>>612738946
you can shoot hotdogs out your ears

>>612739222
Free hotdogs, how is that useless?

>>612739571
ARE YOU SAYING YOU WANT HOTDOGS TO COME OUT OF YOUR EARS???

You can turn your hair into spaghetti

>>612738946
every good looking black girl will give you 30.000 dollars for every breath they take

>>612738946
Everytime you touch paper it becomes moist

You are really good at sex.

You can slow down time, but you are also slowed down

>>612738946
Make women grow cocks

>>612738946
you turn into a nigger but only when cops are around

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>>612740392
>useless

You have the power the shoot a cotton ball out of one ear every ten seconds if you want

>>612740536
>if you want

>>612740342
this could be useful in a lot of situations as long as you could think normal speed

you can make money disappear

Able to predict last weeks winning lottery numbers without any looking or hints.

>>612739571
they arent free, you would probably have to load them after buying at the hotdog store

>>612739983
kek

>>612738946
the astounding ability to fart so that only one person may smell it

>>612739983
Superpowers can't be based on subjectivity, anon. Go back to shitposting in black girl threads.

Smelling colours

>>612738946

You can see -0.0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 times better.

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Your power is to see if you have a power

>>612740630
No, everything in the universe is slowed down. That includes your mind.

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>>612740684
>predict last weeks
>predict
>last weeks
>predick
>pre

Able to squirt ketchup out of your eyes

Your fingernails grow a little bit everytime you sneeze

>>612740876
just try shrooms

>>612741000
You literally would notice no difference, then.

>>612739983
that would be a USEFUL super power you stupid nigger

>>612741218
exacly

hear cockroaches

>>612741351
hear cocks

you put on socks on your hands and you can fly, but the socks are made of cotton candy

>>612738946
super human strength
but only when you're sleeping

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>>612740831
post ANY good looking black girl and ill donate my life earnings to africa

there is a reason why black girls climb overr white dick

>>612741425
well you can still fly

>>612740961
SUPER-power, anon.

>>612740806
I'd actually like that. It would be entertaining during family dinners.

>>612740679
You could use this to make your ex's money dissapear. I'd like that.

able to grow more teeth anywhere but in your mouth

>>612741257
>the joke
>you

Able to make people's heads explode, but only if you maintain eye contact for 8 hours

Ability to use x-ray vision, but only on giraffes

>>612740491
Fage

the ability to hear audible ejaculations, but only if the semen lands on your face

You can hear and communicate with sperm but only if you press your ear to another man's scrotum.

You never get a tired jaw when chewing 10 gums at the same time

You have the same super powers as batman has.

You never get tired of eating McDonald's

You can communicate with jellyfish, but they have a deep distrust for you and will never give valuable information

you can accurately describe any protozoan

you have control over static electricity, but all you can ever do with it is shock the fuck out of yourself whenever you touch a doorknob.

I love you /b/.

>>612740325
Underated post

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>>612741478

You can go through walls but you can't control it

>>612738946
I would like this superpower.

>I like to dress in women's clothing.
>Hairy legs look shit when dressed up
>shaved legs look weird and gay on a guy
>with this super power, I could shave my legs, dress up, then be back to full guy-leg mode extraordinarily fast

you can command any actual good looking people on /b/ to do your bidding

>>612740876
Actually a thing. Called synesthesia.

You can turn into a nigger.

>>612741185
Set a world record.

>>612741000
Check 'em

You always wake up with bed hair and you can never fix it with any hair product

>>612745134
I might as well transfer my money to a trust fund for my children because you obviously can't provide proof

>>612745665
Oh shit, synesthesia would be cool

Like shrooms the whole time

your body can resist extremely hight pressure

>>612740325
kek

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>>612744266

>>612740432
Superpowers not curses.

The power to gain a pound for every faggot in your thread

I'm getting fatter by the minute

The ability to charge electronics, but only underwater.

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>>612745134

The ability to see colors.

>>612746616
>what are waterproof electronics

the ability to converse with niggers

able to turn your nipples into dicks, and vice-versa.

>>612741648
Grow incisors on fists and punch shit. Done.

>>612745789
Run faster

The ability to copy your own ability

>>612747122
>autofellatio
>useless
Pick one

>>612745789
Satisfy your girlfriend for once

get people on /b/ to like you

>>612747609
then get 25 years to life

>you can walk on water but only when it's frozen
>you can see into the past
>you can find anything you've ever lost but it will always be in the last place you look
>you can talk to dogs.. but they can't understand you

I actually have these guise

You have a very vast understanding of the future, but it is so far in the future that you can not put it in any terms, plus it it so profound and unbelievable that it seems no one will believe you. Plus you have nightmares about the horror you see in your mind, never being able to tell anyone about it in a manner that makes you look sane.

>>612747156
Teeth have nerves which would make it painful

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You get god-like powers BUT only when you get a gf

>>612748485
I have this

>>612739983
so, do good looking half-black girls give me 15,000?

>>612748648
>easy

pick grossest woman on earf and pay them munch money to date me. I get god power and become a Hanson gentleman

>>612748228
>walk on 1mm thin ice
>not specified timeframe or perspective
>go blind every time you find something you lost
>implying dogs dont understand already

>>612749092
In my ass

xray vision but only through windows