>>590839383
was the vomit flavoured kiss all you thought it would be?

Nope. You dont't cumbastard.
You lost your virgin and Im superman.
Must show proofs

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eh b0ss incest is not wincest

>>590839383
One day you'll realise that your brain can still semi function after a drink and decisions like these are not made

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>I am at school.
>I'm coming to the end of my education and I haven't got laid yet.
>Time to get serious.
>As part of our curriculum I must get some work experience.
>Get a nice, petty job working in an office.
>Secretary there, definitive 8/10
>Keep making eye contact, keeps smiling.
>Istihshappening.jpg?
>She goes into photocopying room, keeps making eye contact. I must follow.
>Istihsrealihapening.gif?
> Before long we make out. On the floor. But no dinosaur.
>She pushed my head down and I knew what to do.
>I sucked and licked her wet clit and then she went back at me and soon I got off.
>Finish.
> I button up my pants and she smiles at me.
>"It's great that you're working in the family business son."

>>590839383
Hey would you ask Lucy if she'd sell me some of her used panties? Thx n advance

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Well fucking a man I would have hit it too
> bonus for wincest

>>590841137
>le clapping man.gif

>>590839383
Personal army request....successful?

>>590839383
cool /b/ro you get your pink wings. I hope you went down on her too.

>>590839383
She was that drunk to fuck a neckbeard like you and you didn't think to take a picture? GTFO you lying faggot kissless virgin.

>>590840025
^

idc if this is true its a good story
(boner achieved)

<wat

>First pretty sure wasn't her vomit
>She tasted sweet like pineapple drink so no compalints there
>This morning although bad hangover she remembered everything
>We talked for a few hours and she said it was a mistake
>She cried :(
>We hugged and she kissed me again
>Then she said no no no we can't and left
>What should I do bros?

Don't be a pussy. Go for it.

>>590842440
You got 17 year old cousin pussy. Quit bitching and be happy.

>>590842440
You took advantage of her, the fact she was drunk and just broken up. She probably thinks you're a faggot now.

>>590842440
>What should I do bros?
Nothing. Just let that drunk trash whore come to you, and ignore her otherwise. I'm not saying this to demean her; this is the only way you'll ever matter to her. You're that backup for when everything goes wrong, and you'll lose her if you pursue.

Just ignore it and act like it never happened until you two are alone and she's drunk and vulnerable again. Then rape the shit out of her some more.

>>590843196
This. Exactly this. Smart anon is smart.

>>590842440
get checked for vd and hiv, she sounds like a girl who goes home from any party dripping dna

>>590843792
"dripping dna" that made me chuckle anon

>>590843196
This grills want what they can't have ignore the bitch

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>>590842440
she'll get drunk again and the same thing will happen, just do it again and eat her out, make her want it to happen over and over

>>590840894
>your brain can still semi function after a drink
Correct.
>decisions like these are not made
Super-duper wrong brah.

>>590843792
This. Exactly this. Smarter anon is smarter.

>>590839383
I went to a ever has been to many over up and gone in or not they gayer than arrogantly she do but don't got do.

>>590843196

We should be friends.

>>590844216
Its called a subconscious it recognises family members

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>>590844584
wat

>>590844584
wat?

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>>590844584

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>>590844597

>>590844584
what

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>>590844584

>>590844584
drunk?

>>590844584
Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

>>590844584
Someone post the classic version of this. It was from /v/ in 2010.

>>590845864
see
>>590845821

>She was fucking tight like waaay tighter than my fleshlight.
>Brian was her second sexual partner.
>She tells me everything when we hang out.
>I didn't go down on her :(
>Unfortunately I came in like 2 minutes and then we went to sleep
>She just texted me and wants me to pick her up from school in an hour

>>590845028
Your body does not have the same degree of familial response to cousins unless you've literally lived in the same house as them for extended periods of time. The only thing your subconscious would object to is the social stigma, and getting drunk is the perfect way to get your subconscious to ignore social stigmas. I'm not saying every time you get drunk you're going to fuck your cousin. I'm just saying that fucking your cousin is totally something that enters the realm of possibility when you're drunk.

dick dick cock dick

>>590846576
>She just texted me and wants me to pick her up from school in an hour

How convenient

>>590846671
I'm highly skeptical man but fair play

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>>590844584
What.

>>590846671
Most people around the world marry their second or third cousin. Its very common in the developing world, and in some rich countries.

>>590846576
Bring her to 4chan and then do some timestamped request pics

>>590840025
Thank you anon that was the first real smoke I've cracked all day

>>590842440
best way to get her back is to communicate absolutely 0

Oh shit her mom just called me and I noped the fuck out of answering

jazz hands

Allll good bros she left voicemail and was just making sure I'm right to give Lucy a lift home

moar pics of lucy

>>590848731
thank god

LUCY PICS NAO

>>590839383
Pics or it didn't happen

didn't hapn

ITT: Didn't happen.

>>590843196
Wisdom.

CONFIRMED: didn't happen

thanks alot op, get my boner up for nothing. what the fuck am i supposed to do with this now

What country mate?

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>>590844584

I'll try and record our convo this afternoon for you bros, any tips on what to say as I'm fucking beta as all fuck?

>>590850696
tell her to come over again.... don't ask, tell

>>590848731
so when are you gonna post more pics of her?

>>590850696
tell her to come over and talk about what happened

>>590850696
Don't bring up the sexy time.

Just act normal. If she says anything, then basically say "what did you think?"

Depending on her answer she either liked it or didn't.

In this case I'm assumimg she liked it, because she wants YOU to pick her up. She probably wants you to bring her back to your house.

Just play it cool, and if she becomes flirty, take the alpha position and say whatever you want.

As in, if she says like "anon tthanks for the ride"
Say, I'd give you a ride anytime.

Make the sexual tension obvious, because teens girls wanna fuck
It's instinct.

>>590839383
My bullshit detector is going crazy

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>>590843108
I find it hard to believe that he "took advantage" of an explicit declaration of consent.
Of course, that's assuming that OP's story isn't complete bullshit.

>>590845028
>seriously implying incest never happens
people are fucked up man

>>590839383
Nudes, or it didn't happen .

>>590851592
This guy knows.

ITT: Either OP
1. Is a lying faggot (99% chance)
2. Used as revenge material for a cousin only to be ditched for whenever she gets back together with Brian or some other nerd

Even in his fantasies OP is a cuck

>>590851592
Kinda this except not too available, but flirty and if she wants to come over...id probably casually say yeah

On my way to pick her up. Will deliver with recording of our conversation and more clothed pics. No nudes cause she is only 17... I am fucking rock hard bros!!!

>>590855134
will bump for pics

fuck i'm a cuck to op's cuck

fuck it i don't care still bumping

>>590839383
Fake and gay

>>590855134
Good luck, /b/ro!

>>590844584
What the fuck did I just read?

>>590855134
Take my advice bro!
>>590851592

>>590855134
sticking around for pics. Don't care if they're clothed bitch is hot as fuck

KEEP THE THREAD ALIVE!

>>590839383
>"Anon it's not fair, you live here all by yourself that's so sad"
>"Anon why don't you have a girlfriend you're so nice"
>"All guys are assholes but not you"
yea....

>>590843196
This guy.

>>590856643
>she wants the D
Captcha: iniga

Fake story is fake. I fapped anyway

waiting for results

>>590839383
more pics of her?

>>590856097
good advice

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>>590844584

Moar pics of her and bone her again and upload or else it didn't happen

BUMP

KEEP THIS THREAD ALIVE TIL' OP GETS BACK FAGS

IF 404 PUT COUSIN AS A KEYWORD IN YOUR POST SO I CAN SEARCH FOR IT OP

Bampu

OP maybe not bullshitting seeing that if you reverse image search nothing comes up. Probably embellished the story a lot though.

>>590859080
pic title seems as though it's from today as well

either he is le master ruseman or at least some part of his story is true

>>590844584
all newfags

>>590839383
post more pics of her you fucking wanker

OP will surely deliver...

>>590859080
story was a little too smooth, not like real life

OP here, sorry turns out I have no cousins and no-one was in my bed but me last night. The fat beta virgin part was true though

all right bros, will be bumping with a story of my cousin
>we were young, like 9 or 10
>we once got our clothes off and said "let's pretend we're at the beach"
>feelsgood.png
>we kept doing it over and over again
>just didn't fuck her because too young, didn't know what to do
>kept doing for a while, did everything imaginible but fuck
>stopped seing her because familly fight(not because of us)
>we have a little contact now (I'm 22 she's 20)

What school is open at 2:04 am eastern standard time or 11:04 pm pacific?

>>590860167
lel nice try ya drangus

>>590860235
I have no idea anon but maybe some sporting event or band?

>>590860235
who ever said she's american

so ignorant of the rest of the world, so fucking retarded. kill self pls

Buump

>>590860235
agree
europe is still in school right now, as it is only around 9:00 AM

>>590841502
>Well fucking a man I would have hit it too
>Well fucking a, man, I would have hit it too.
Commas are important.

Took advantage faggot. My step sister and I were drunk as shit and it almost happened. I felt awful and I sincerely hope you regret it.
End rant/

>>590860235

haha good one bro!

this is the only thread that i genuinely wants op to deliver.

>>590861211
Kindly an hero

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>>590844584

>>590844584
Yo man. The strongest. Into the totally with that and can't even passed it from the other dude.

>>590861125
Clearly OP is Russian.

>>590860235
Like it has to be a school not in the US if he isnt a beta fag tier bitch.

Op swore a pic 30 mins befofe. I think he wont deliva and fagging or fake OP

>>590862051
did any1 reverse image search girl in OP?


We better tell OP to post more pics or we're sending a copy of this thread to her and his family

don't let the thread die!

>>590841137
All those fucking desktop icons.
All my rage.

Bumping the bread, bored at school... It's 8 AM to the cunt that thinks everyone is from 'Murica

>>590862252
just did,nothing found.

This thread is dead...

keep it going fags

>>590861274
this is b, and so the odds that 1 picture op is telling the truth is extremely low

cmon op may not be bulshiting

im 98% sure this shit is real and im about 60% sure op is not a fag

>>590842440
dump more pics obvs

Just post her nudes, OP... she's 18.

did OP abandon ?

>>590863482
and you know this by reading that fairy tale he wrote or the non existent photo proof?

>>590864326
yes

its looking that way

OP is legendary. No way she loves you OP, but damn you fucked that drunk bitch, good for you. Now just try to avoid the fallout.

>>590864692
>>590864843
you retards read the thread. he went to go pick her up

he told us to bump and promised pics and an audio recording of their conversation

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>>590840322
http://young-roulette.tumblr.com/

free l i v e

>be me, 18
>college party at frat house
>douchey frat, guys can't get in unless we bring grills
>ask some grills from my hall to go
>they bite
>pregame in their dorm because guys have to pay for beer
>drinking straight Vlad
>have a good time in their dorm until we leave
>show up to the frat with 3 chicks
>frat brothers are pumped, high fiving me and shit
>get in the party, nobody I know is there
>girls follow me everywhere because I am the alpha
>the entire party is really just me and the girls having fun
>dancing with 3 9/10 chicks the entire party
>grinding on me
>cock is throbbing
>girl 1 notices my party rod
>tells girls 2 & 3
>they all start grinding just to feel it
>tryingnottocum.mp3
>they start rubbing it while looking me in the eyes
>taking turns rubbing shlong and making out with me
>time to make it home
>make out and grope our way upstairs
>open bedroom for fucking
>occupied
>open another bedroom
>occupied
>mfw every room in a frat house is occupied
>what do
>I'll just fuck them on the ground
>find a closet
>thiswilldo.jpg
>girls still grabbing meat
>tongue fucking their brains out
>begging me to 4 way them
>open the door
>get on the floor
>everybody walk the dinosaur

>>590840322
PINK GUY

inb4 she turns out to be pregnant

Mfw please op

>>590865216
You sir. Are a god

>>590843196
Hahah this thread still going. Yeah this is the only way. When sober she will hate what she's done and will NOT reciprocate any advances. When she's trashed again, heh, just be in the right place at the right time.

OP could be in Australia. It's 6 pm

>>590866167
And also school holidays

>>590866167

Almost 7 in East Australia, (Vic, Qld, NSW)

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OH PEEEEEE

>>590866620
▲
▲ ▲

>>590845028
true, but my drunk self thought it would be ok to run through downtown anonville and jump on a cop car... sober anon would not do that. I am not saying I would bang my cousin, but the point is that decision making skills including sub-conscious gets a little sketchy.

Pic looks like a UK school uniform, could also be Aus. Or BS. Meh, still here.

bumpian

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>>590839383

just for shits and giggles lets pretend your not full of shit.

she will not be around for a repeat showing, here's why:

if that really was your first time, you sucked. End of story, everyone does their first dozen or so times due to confusion/nerves, it's not big deal.

She however does not know that she took your v card, she (rightly) assumes a 28 year old man would have a LOT of sexual experience, much more so than her.

Because of this her conclusion is that your just really bad in bed...like, REALLY bad, and will not want to fuck you again.

The only solution to this woluld be to tell her she popped your cherry which would actually be worse because than rather than just being a bad lay, your a 28 year old virgin that had to loose his v card by taking advantage of a blubbering drunk cousin.

Your only hope is that shes not very sexualy experienced and thusly doesn't know that you suck in bed

damned if you do, damned if you don't.

recommend killing yourself

>>590865216
top kek

will give this thread 10 more minutes

>>590865216
Fuuuuuk kekk. That one changed me.

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>>590843196
This gave me a mini boner.

>>590867822
1. he probably sucked, but she was drunk
2. you are bein overly pessimistic

>>590867822
/thread

H

Thread is dying guys

Keep this shit

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Bumping with random shit

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we need moar pics, OP

If it's actually true he's not going to have any interest in stopping to upload audio before anything else happens guys. Might as well let it die.

Bumpex
By the way did you notice her HS logo? (The "H" above a Tree?)

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>>590839383
gj anon

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Look at it

5 minutes

>>590869765

I do doubt he will upload audio, he might just use it to quote it.

>implying we're not being b8

Man op wish this was a true story i loved it got my dick woken up

>>590839383
way to go champ

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Ayy lmao

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>>590870182
Nope it's yaoi thread

>>590839383
>Be me 19 yr old
>Just finished HS because I had gotten kicked out the previous year #justalternativeschoolthings
>Mom letting me stay with her
>Starts dating Bryon
>Bryon is cool has 4 kids
>9y boy, 12y girl, 14y girl, 22yr girl
>3 younger live with him
>get a call, Darrels house on fire
>ohfuckareyouserious.mp4
>Mom offers to let the stay with us
>whateyyer, I'll deal with the little shits
>FF- 3-4 Months
>Kids sleep in different room
>12am- Laying down watching About Schmit
>Door creaks open
>It's the 14yr old in her undies
>She comes in sits on my bed
>me "what the fuck do you think you are doing"
>14 "Juss wanted to see what you were doing"
>Me "Get the fuck out of here"
>14 "Why?!?"
>Me "Because I fucking told you to"
>Walks out
>Next evening, I give her one shitty look

End of story

Pretty sure op lost his own thread

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>>590870182
I have been waiting for you

>Be me 19 yr old
>Just finished HS because I had gotten kicked out the previous year #justalternativeschoolthings
>Mom letting me stay with her
>Starts dating Bryon
>Bryon is cool has 4 kids
>9y boy, 12y girl, 14y girl, 22yr girl
>3 younger live with him
>get a call, Darrels house on fire
>ohfuckareyouserious.mp4
>Mom offers to let the stay with us
>whateyyer, I'll deal with the little shits
>FF- 3-4 Months
>Kids sleep in different room
>12am- Laying down watching About Schmit
>Door creaks open
>It's the 14yr old in her undies
>She comes in sits on my bed
>me "what the fuck do you think you are doing"
>14 "Juss wanted to see what you were doing"
>Me "Get the fuck out of here"
>14 "Why?!?"
>Me "Because I fucking told you to"
>Walks out
>Next evening, I give her one shitty look

End of story

Op is kill
r.i.p. op

>>590870619
r.i.p. in peace OP

>>590861211
>step sister

Meaning that if your mom/dad and her mom/dad didn't hook up she would just be another hot chick. Wtf is wrong with you for not doing that.

>>590870807
About to write that. Lol love u <3

>>590861168
>>590861168
>>590861168
>>590861168
i love you

>>590861211
Yep incest is fucked up...

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Look at it and cry you faggots

>>590850054
Go stick it in a drunk cousin.

>>590871080
>step sister
>incest
Wt

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>>590870182
Sure

>>590867822
dude i don't think you realize that some women fuck guys that aren't good at sex.

>>590867822
i love it

Girl looks like Kayla mcgregor


Facebook her

>>590871157
if i had a qt cousin who drinks i'd be all over that

fuck morals nigga

>>590871260
alright so its not technicality incest, but have some morals. I think a lot of the shit on here is funny, but a lot of it irl would be messed up.

>>590840025
kek

>>590871424
U da real mvp

>>590867822
or you know she was drunk enough to fuck her kissless virgin 28 year old cousin so not only does she not remember anything (because being drunk inhibits your ability to remember, rather than makes things 'hard to remember'), consequently, she doesn't remember it was a bad fuck so he doesn't have to follow your shitty advice

>>590871612
Who the fuck are you to decide the morality of what two consenting adults do with their time?

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>>590844584

>>590871746
sigh, op said that she remembered it

a lot of the shittier posts itt would be eliminated if you fucks were literate

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>>590871978

>>590871834
who the fuck are you to decide weather is doesn't cross a moral line. goes both ways.

>>590870507
>Starts dating Bryon
>Bryon is cool has 4 kids
>Bryon

>get a call, Darrels house on fire
>Darrels

wat

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>>590846972
johnathan cheban?

>>590872080
Shut up you sound like faggot

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>>590872077
Check em

>>590872080
I made no such decision, friend.

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>>590872275

>>590871746
>(because being drunk inhibits your ability to remember, rather than makes things 'hard to remember')
I think what you're pseudo-literate undeveloped mind is trying to say is that alcohol inhibits your ability to code short-term memories into your long-term memory storage, rather than making retrieval from long-term memory difficult.

>>590872388
that other guy is asshole

>>590839383
eh, she being hot is subjective, either way, enjoy it you beta lord, you will never fuck anything else again.

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>>590872416
Last one

>>590872080
That moral line is up to the involved parties.

>>590872508
But obviously him not you, right?

>Be me
>i've kissed but never had any other sexual advances
>meet girl
>not the best face but an amazing body
>shit is on point
>i start trying to get with her but she isn't budging
>one day she grabs me and tell me to follow her
>whatdoyouwantwithme.jpg
>takes me to girls bathroom
>there is this black girl and another white girl standing there
>they start punching me and shit
>punch the black one as hard as i can
>she is fucking out
>white girl is all that is left
>this is sparta kick into a wall
>the other girl was just watching
>told her to go fuck herself for that
>later on in class i get sent to the principal
>Did you beat up these girls anon?
>Yes
>Why?
>they ganged up on me so i beat them up i did nothing wrong
>i get in no trouble at all
>walking out the girl that brought me to the gang asks me to follow her again
>she says it wasn't on purpouse and she's sorry
>she wants to make it up to me
>brings me into a stall
>starts sucking my dick
>hey anon can i have 3.50 cents
It was about that time I realized that I had just gotten a blow job from a 8 stories tall crustacean from the paleozoic era
god damn loch ness monster had tricked me again

>>590865216
You sir, are an inspiration

i get the feeling that all this waiting will be in vain, because you idiots are wasting the bump limit bickering

stop niggers

>>590872553
>clap
I enjoyed thisss

>>590872767
fuck you you are faggot

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le awkward penguin

>>590846576
She called the cops and they are waiting for you there

>>590870576
this is the saddest story i've ever read. my prayers go out to you

>>590843196
The only non virgin on /b/

>>590867822
My first time lasted 40 minutes and she came...

>>590872553
Anon you da the real MVP

>>590847022
>citation needed

>>590872553
Good.

Op is a fag Will not deliver

>>590872705

9/11

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>>590844584

>>590843196

10/10

>>590872197
Kek. Not even sus

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>>590873672

>>590848748
this

Guys so I have this cousin who I only see on the holidays and she's a year older than me. I always notice her looking over at me but when I turn to her she just looks away shyly and smiles a bit. She's pretty cute, considering she's my cousin but I'm not sure what to make of this.

>>590874119
Next time you see her follow her into the bathroom and sex her, even if she says no.

>>590839383
>>"Anon why don't you have a girlfriend you're so nice"
>>"All guys are assholes but not you"
LOLOLOLOLOL
righteo OP

>>590870507
I laughed way too hard at this for no reason

>>590865216
I will golf clap to this.

OP u faggot liar fuck u and ur shit

>>590872705
You fucked up the punchline. You don't say "can I have 3.50 cents" it's "about tree fiddy"

has been longer than an hour, losing faith in OP, reports are coming in that he is in fact a fag

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>>590842440
you sad pathetic piece of shit shell of a man

>>590874305
I don't think that would work very well

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>>590875056

>2 hrs 8 mins since OP supposedly left

faggggggot

captcha fucking related: swine

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>>590872080
who the fuck are you

>>590875926

probably getting ice cream, or is talking to the police.