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ITT most fucked thing you did in school
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ITT most fucked thing you did in school
>>
laugh at a kid wth my twoo gfs
>>
>>561534291
fucked a 14 year old girl in the school theatre.

that was fun
>>
>>561534291
Worked hard, respected my parents, cared about my grades and followed the rules. Worst decisions ever.
>>
i plasticspoon catapulted a pea at this one girls head, like 15 yards away and landed the shot
>>
I beat the fuck out of a kid in wrestling practice for trying to put his finger in my ass.

I wish I was joking.
>>
>>561534856
You loose cannon, you!
>>
>>561534291
Asked my Spanish teacher in 7th grade how to say divorce in Spanish the first day she was back after a 2 week leave after being divorced. She broke down in class.
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>>561534856
this
>>
>>561534291
Study
>>
Also, I glued some sad dumbass in a blue tank top to a wall. That shit wasn't right, but the rest of the class got a kick out of it.
>>
>>561535013
You probably liked it
>>
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>>561535039
>>
I tripped a nigger that hated me and then after he fell on the ground and the assistant principle came over I played it off and said that he tried to trip me so he got written up
>>
Kicked a retarded kid in the face for spitting on me, then proceeded to spit directly into his ear. He cried a lot.
>>
>>561535039
Rekt
>>
>be 10
>be with this guy that I don't like
>chase down a rude girl that was 8 years old
>pull on her shirt and look at her nipples
>she tried to resist but we forced it
>laugh while doing it

I feel pretty shit about it now that I know what I did
>>
same nigger bitch took my seat at lunch so I asked if it was because I was white and when he said yes I started a commotion and freaked out on him until an administrator came over and I called him out on being "racist" so he was suspended and wasn't allowed to be near me
> fuckyeah.png
>>
>bully emo kid
>decide to take full advantage
>threaten to beat the shit out of him if he doesn't suck my dick every day
>as expected, he does so every day
>a few months pass
>he's sucking my dick as usual
>blow load on his face
>he breaks down crying and says he loves me
>fucking smack that faggot across the face
>avoid him completely
>he stops going to school shortly afterward
>never hear about him again

I'm sorry, Jason.
>>
I got raped by an emo kid consistently for an entire year. Almost daily one month.
>feelsbad
>>
>>561534291
>right before me and my girlfriend got back together I got some good dome in my step moms empty classroom(junior year)
>>
>>561534856
Fucking this. Just graduated University this summer and about to start a trip around Europe and Africa. I'll worry about my career and relationships later, time to live life.
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>>561535710
You messed it up, you had something going there
>>
When i was like in first grade the daughter of the teacher was in the same class as me, and she was the only one who got perfect scores in everything. I was so fucking pissed off that i screamed at my teacher "GO FUCK YOURSELF YOU FUCKING BITCH!"
The teacher talked with my parents and i got grounded and stuff, so i got a marker and i wrote on the floor of the school "FUCK YOU MS. X FROM ANON".

I got grounded again and they made me clean the whole fucking floor but i don't regret it. It's by far my best memory from school
>>
>>561535710
>>561535724

wat
>>
>>561535710
>>561535724
wait what?
>>
>>561534675
Teaching has its benefits
>>
>>561535935
>>561536096
Yeah, that's a bit weird. And really fucking coincidental. We pretty much posted at the same time.
My name is Martin, nicknamed "Marty" or "Max(in my earlier/junior years)."
So, not the same. Thankfully.
>>
>>561535724
Jason never got over his love for >>561535710, huh? Took it out on some other faggot?
>>
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>>561536196
Sounds plausible
>>
>Senior year
>We got a new college counselor this year
>She has no idea how to do her job (not that she tries, anyway)
>Complete bitch throughout the year
>Finally, last month of school
>Get a clear, plastic container and fill it with gummy bears
>Haribo sugarless, to be specific
>Write some bullshit note which said, "We couldn't BEAR to not have you this year!"
>Later in the day, I'm walking through the hallway.
>See her running with a weird stride and crying
>Goddamnthatfeltgood.gif


>>561535582
Someone put a nigger in their place when the victim was white?
Give that man a medal.
>>
i sold weed in the student parking lot to literally anyone who wanted it even the middle or elementary schoolers (all three schools were connected
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>>561534675
what school bruh
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>>561534291
creampied my 14yo gf in the headmasters office after we've been there cuz we got caught smoking pot in class while doing math finals.
>>
>>561535935
>>561536096
for fuck sake
obvious bait is obvious faggots
>>
Have many things.
> play hackey sack every day during lunch in this hallway
>guy I don't really mind but am really mean to sometimes plays with us
>go to "snake" the sack from him but really just want to kick him in the balls
>dude I'm so sorry
>tfw laughingwhores.jpg
Another
>go to overcrowded school with 6200 odd students
>power goes out, proceed to instigate riot in cafeteria foyer
>shit gets really out of hand they tip over a pop machine
>bottle of Gatorade rolls to me, fuck yes
>go in bathroom and piss in the bottle, go back to chaos
> looking for target, notice this big Serbian fuck who annoys the shit out of me
> take aim, fire
> hits him in the head and breaks open
>I am okay with this
> he starts screaming in his e eastern European accent," who hit me in head with bottle piss??"
>I am laid out cracking up as he works himself up
>he reaches in his backpack and pulls out a plastic bag and drops an unopened can of pop in and starts laying into people with it
>my fucking sides when I never got caught
>>
>>561536402
That sounds most pleasureable. I envy you
>>
>>561536419
Not bait, just an odd coincidence.
>>
>>561536130
haha. nah. I was a student there and 17 at the time.

>>561536382
the school I went to when I was younger. although that was 10 years ago now
>>
Wrote SHIT on the boys bathroom wall with my own shit.
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>>561534291
Stabbed a girl in the back of the hand with a pencil for pushing me in the lunch line.
Got in trouble for being violent, especially with a girl.
Took the alternative by calling her a "fat ho" until she developed self-esteem issues, might have made her anorexic too.
>>
>>561535836
>inb4 Ebola
>>
>>561535550
sounds hot. pics?
>>
Worked hard, respected my parents, cared about my grades and followed the rules, but also stayed back after school every day for a year to jack off in the classroom. Nobody ever found out, don't think they even thought I was capable of such a thing, being a model student and all.
>>
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>>561536628
Women are so weak-willed I swear
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>>561536626
Diego must have been pissed.
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>>561535710
no homo
>>
I pee'd in a cup then I poured on my crush's locker
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>>561535550
you created a tumblr cunt that day about how she was RAPED at age 8 by two CIS SCUM MEN
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got behind a girl, grabbed her hips and thrust my hard dick into her butt.
>>
>>561536532
Where the hell did you go to school? The inner city?
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>>561536626
Florida middle school?..
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>>561535236

>laughing baby suitcases.png

FTFY
>>
>>561536539
we passed the finals btw
>>
>have to stay back after class
>11 yo girl in my class can't finish work
>principle is in connected room but too busy
>tell her ill do it if she kisses me dick
>puts it in her mouth straight away and swiggles tongue like she knows what shes doing
>give her answers to half homework
>getnakedfortherest.jpg
>cutest little pussy ever
>lick and finger her
>lay on top of her
>sotight.wav
>principle walks in
>ohfuck.gif
>lose job
>sex offenders list
>>
Most fucked up think I did in HS was dump my gf out of the blue. Everything was going fine but I just got bored so I went on fb, twitter, my phone, myspace, and blocked her off of fucking everything. Didn't even say a word, just out of the blue. And I never answered when other people asked what happens, her fiends or even my friends. I offered no explanation , I just, stopped talking to her. Didn't even say we broke up, I just stopped.

It completely rekt her. This was over 3 years ago and I'm STILL getting messages from her every time she finds me on a social media or something. I get a message or email every holiday and my birthday. Literally haven't said a WORD to her since and she's still trying to contact me. Pretty sure I've rekt her ability to fall in love and trust others.

Will post proof if anyone wants to see what messages from a heartbroken destroyed 21 year old still trying to figure out what happened 3 years ago if anyone wants to see.
>>
>>561537034
Nope, just a really fucking big school that had three different towns that fed it kids from their middle schools. There were only like 100 black kids in the whole school and they weren't even the ghetto ones
>>
>>561534291
>Graduated with no problems
I'm terrible, I know.
>>
>>561537326
kek
>>
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>>561537326
>>
Our teacher was late, so I tried to break-in by using my pencil as a lock pick. The graphite snapped off into the keyhole and I just walked away. When an administrator came by to let us in, he jammed the pencil lead all the way in and the lock broke. They had to wait ~2 hours for someone to come by and replace the handle and lock set.
>>
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>>561537387
you have my attention
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For senior prank I pissed on the floors of the bathroom and span around
>>
it was by accident but i still feel bad
>outside on small blacktop
>playing sharks and minnows
>few are the sharks who tag the minnows
>i felt bad for the chubby kid
>ran especially slow to catch him
>apparently i ran too slow
> i tapped him on the back and he tripped over his shoelaces falling headfirst into the brick wall
>the noise was so loud
>he walked away with a huge-ass bump on his head and probably a concussion
>i still have no idea how he's doing
>he was like 7 and i was in 5th grade
>>
Shat on Debra's desk.
>>
One of the teachers once forgot her purse in the classroom before everyone went to eat during lunch break. I waited until everyone left, took out her wallet and hid it in the bag of a kid that I hated, then went to the cafeteria.

When I returned, the teacher was already there, furiously looking through her bag. The principal was also called. He made everyone unload their bags one by one, and of course the wallet was found in the kid's bag. He denied stealing it, but since he was a delinquent (which is why I hated him, he was fucking with me and everyone else in the class every now and then) no one believed him and was promptly expelled.
>>
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>>561537387
yes pls
>>
>>561537387
yes!
>>
>be in grade three
>kid that I hate sits next to me because teacher made us
>kid is really pissing me off today
>he goes to sit down
>i pull the chair from under him
>he smacks his face on the desk
>breaks all his front teeth
>teacher tells him to be more careful as she is freaking the fuck out

Got away with it.
>>
>>561536348
ahahaha the laxative gummy bears
>>
>wanted to green text
>didn't feel like it
>I punched a retarded kid in the mouth
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I used to be bullied by 1 guy in middleschool

I made 1kg of gunpowder
Filled his backpack made a pentagram around it with gunpowder and some swastikas with red paint and set a little time device to turn it on with a small part of candle, also left this message in the wall "keep your bully shit and you will be next" later after recess we all walked in and everyone was 3 mins in wtf mode and then the show began, he never bullied anyone else and left school next year.

No one knew it was me but they suspected.
>>
>>561537816
10/10
>>
>>561537387

God damn it dude, she just want closure. A breakup without any closure is crazy emotion-wise.
>>
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>>561535803
>I got some good dome
Dome?
You mean you got head from a bald uy?
>>
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>>561537574
>>561537703
>>561537720


Ok. Will pst more soon. This is a message I got last month when I made a Couchsurfing account on Couchsurfing.com.

Fucking Couchsurfing.com
>>
>>561537387
Yes pls
>>
>>561534675
Eyo Inzy mate
>>
>>561534291
>whole class hates high school teacher
>one day near the end of school we all do what we want during last period, ignoring him
>he leaves the room the reprimand student because of something
>while hes gone i pour water bottle on his chair, its cloth so it soaks it all up
>he comes back and sits in it
>visibly disturbed, he just sits there quietly for the rest of class
>while we are leaving tears coming down his face
>>
>>561537964
*bald guy*
>>
>>561537809
I use to do that all the time. No one ever got seriously injured unfortunately.
>>
>>561538002
Moar
>>
>>561535710
You gay nigga
>>
>>561538002
what are you motivations to have done it?
>>
>>561535836
I wish I had money for that.
>>
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>>561538002
I lol at how she starts to blame herself. Also she knows I live in a different country now, we don't have the same holidays you moron. I wonder how long she'll keep messaging me.
>>
>>561537928
What am I reading?
>>
>>561538002
jesus, she even thinks that she was responsible.
still, was there not another reason for you breaking up with her? just boredom?
>>
>>561534291
I punched a guy on top of the stairs, broke his nose and pushed him off. He had broken nose, few ribs and leg kek, I got expeled and landed alone in a class with 32 grills, was worth it.
>>
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>>561538002
>being in uganda made me wonder where your parents came from
>mfw you're black
>mfw she wants dat anaconda

Moar pls
>>
Broke a girls hand with a hammer when she called my gf a bitch. Then she called her a slut and i broke it again but that time i put a nail in. thank fuckin lord i had a mask on both occasions because i would have been fucked.
>>
>>561538387
hory shet you fucking rekt her.
>>
>middle school
>people thought caffeine pills were the best things ever
>students abused them and it was banned in school
>no way to get them cuz only 13 at time, but profits were to be made as they were selling for 2 bucks a pill
>steal my moms medication.
>it's Metoprolol 50mg tablets
>sell em as caffeine pills
>sold 10 to this one kid, fuck ya $20
>kid proceeds to take all 10 at once
>idgaf cuz I didn't know what metoprolol was
>kid passes out in gym class
>pale, sweaty, losing consciousness
>paramedics had to pace him with those electrical defibrillator things
I guess he died at one point, and they coded him and brought him back to life.
He stopped going to our school after that
I spent the money on a 3 doors down album
>>
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>>561538002
wait, you're a nigger?

and she went to uganda to learn more about what it was like for your parents...but you're not even ugandan? this bitch tripping lmao
>>
>>561537387
I'm very interested but
>her fiends
I leled
CAPTCHA licknet gold
>>
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>>561534291
Well for the past year me and my class mates have spent 70% of the school time high in the locker room
>mfw our teacher dont give a shit
>>
>>561537387
Pics or didn't happen
>>
>>561538434
Boredom and me leaving the country soon. To me this way was easier than telling her in leaving the country and have to spend my last few weeks with her and all that bullshit and me comforting her and shit. Not even trying to be edgy, I was just lazy and this was required the least amount of work.
>>
> fapped everyday in english class to fat ass teacher
> made fat friend eat cum
>>
>>561535836
I hate you I truly in my heart of hearts fucking hate you, this ...this ..whole whatever the fuck you call this white dominated existence...I fucking hate it. I pray for the day the throats begin to be slit and heads start to roll...my hand trembles just thinking about it. I died along time ago so I could give 2 fucks about death or prison I pray for your blood to spill the ground every fucking night. Fuck your existence.
>>
>bullying fat indian kid with big head
>call him weird names he gets angy easily
>summer, pretty hot ouside
>school is getting new toilets
>have to shit in portable toilets
>toilets face the school perfectly so you can see inside from every corner
>one day he has to take a shit
>sits down, doesn't close the door properly
>see my opportunity and open it
>unable to close it because elementary school and hes too short
>sitting there sweating like a pig taking a big shit
>smell coming out of it children are running away laughing
>whole school sees him shitting with a terrified look on his face
>hes getting angry now screaming at me for doing this to him
>starts crying
>teachers notice and rescue him
>not allowed to go near the toilet for the rest of the week
>school had someone guarding the toilets from then on even after the new ones were done

great times
>>
> this kid who lived down the roads mom killed herself
> dad killed himself infront of him informing him its his fault
> lives with grandfather now and pulls his hair out we call him patches
> socially akward as fuck me
> me and another neibor jumped him while he was riding his bike and threw it in the ditch
> just really beat the shit out of him regularly
> one day he comes to my house while a bunch of freinds were over and he starts getting weird as fuck
> tell him to leave he refuses
> try to force him out he gets under the air hocky table and holds on to one of the legs with his arms and legs
> get a rope tie it around him and all my freinds to pull on him to remove him
> beat his ass in the yard and chased him away
>>
>>561538387
Dude send her with a psychologist or else her entire existance will go to shit, she has the profile of an emotionally unestable person.
>>
>>561534291
I threw a bunch of pollinating flowers into a black retarded kids hair. that yellow shit would not come out with all that grease in it. all the apes were throwing a fit trying to figure out who it was. His name was charles. i heard he was kill

also he was friends with another kid that i nicknamed "the boxer" because he would punch wildly like a praying mantis. one time he caught me off guard as i was coming around the corner at school. knocked me pretty good in the head. so i sucker punched him a couple days later when the special ed teacher was busy with another tard fight. the boxer never saw it coming
>>
>>561536532
Have some more of my high school delinquency
>so I failed sixth grade because I didn't think they would actually fail me so I did zero homework
> get kicked our of high school freshman year but it is cool moving to the house my folks built
> so I am already older then most of the other class mates not to mention I failed a grade and missed a year of school from being kicked out so as a junior I was almost twenty
> first day of school my optimism is strong plus I'm high as fuck so I feel like I'm am going to quit being a delinquent asshole
> go through the day going well when I get to my Spanish class
>nofuckingway.jpg I know my Spanish teacher, we went to high school together before I got kicked out
> this is fucking amazing,
Continued>>
>>
>>561538002
>Being in Uganda made me wonder how where your parents came from...

Bad boyfriend also confirmed for nigger.
>>
>>561538895
i would have done the same thing myself.
good job.
>>
paid a fat retarded black TLC kid 5 bucks to smash an apple on his head
>>
>>561534291
wrote a detailed letter about my ISS teachers dead husband and how he comes back from the dead to rape her and shit.. printed it out and told her to go pick it up. she didn't come back to class. principal came and got me, told me she went home crying. got OSS for 3 days.
>>
>>561538002
sounds like a sweet girl tbh

You're just moronic and I'm 200% sure you'll regret your actions.

I know I did, just let the age bring it like a "rekt"cking wave
>>
>>561538002
Oh god. Plz just respond, she sounds like a nice person.
>>
>>561535710
stale pasta
>>
>>561538917

>i died a long time about
>my hand trembles just thinking about it
>i could give 2 fucks about death or prison

the edge
>>
>>561538978
TOP KEK
>>
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Just remembered something.

>be in 3rd grade
>swegin it
>kid behind me is a real fruitbowl
>just thought he was a little girly at the time
>always called him buckteeth
>he cried immediately each and every time
>once whispered in his ear that I was going to "fuck him bloody"
>cried so hard that he had a panic attack and almost choked on his own breath
>teacher blames me, get suspended for a week
>mfw I now realize my choice of words must have made him weirded out considering he's actually gay now and probably was then
>>
>>561539246
the newfag
>>
>>561539086
Yeah..I'm probably the laziest person I know. Even all the grammar and spelling errors throughout all my comments I'm too lazy to backspace and fix them. She was clingy so it made dropping her easier.

Also I was her first boyfriend so I think it hit harder.
>>
>3rd grade
>transfer student
>need2shit.png
>no sign of bathroom
>shit my pants and attend classes with 1st grade kids
>nobody noticed
>go home
I kinda enjoyed the mushiness
>>
>>561534675
That you Riley?
>>
>>561535710
wat....
>>
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>>561534291

>be 13, youngest in crew
>older guys made some party, some guys were even in prison
>shitload of weed, drinks
>some full retard is in the house
>he was 15,happy that no one is beating him now
>he is wrestling with the guys
>suddenly his pants are taken off, retard is confused
>older guys starts fucking him "hey you have to do it if you want to be here"
>he complies
>some of older dudes to me "now is your turn Anon"
>i know if i dont fuck him i am next
>i fucked the retard
>"aaww right kiddo" they high five me
>years later
>still feeling guilty about it
>>
>>561536332

You need to never come here again if you're going to spread this stupid horseshit.
>>
>>561538895
Jeremy?
>>
>>561535710
>fucking smack that faggot across the face
Why did you hit yourself?
>>
>>561539328
>3rd grade
>fuck you bloody

K
>>
>be 11
>get in trouble with parental Dad unit for bad grades, he takes my Playstation
>Just borrowed "Guitar Hero" from a friendly neighborhood kid
>when he's not there break the lock on his door and play that shit for 5 hours,then put it back.
>Put the lock back together but it looks like shit.
>He doesn't notice for 3 days.
>Never trusts me again, because his girlfriend is paranoid I stole her weed.
>He's dead now.
>At least he's not around to see me be a giant faggot.
>>
Let me tell you a story about something that happened to me. I was in 8th grade, we had a high school attached to the already massive school so there was a lot of kids there.

I was fat, like over 350 lbs. never talked, to anyone, not even the teachers other than yes or no. I remember one time I tried to help a girl who dropped her books, her arm touched mine, I still remember how soft her skin was to this day.

anyways, we all went out on a trip to "clean up the city". we had to wear gloves and masks because of the used condoms and needles around.

by the end of the day a group of guys ask if I wanted to go for a walk with them, they were going to pull a prank on the teacher. they told me to check if he was in the shed or not yet. I peaked in, and they all pushed me.I got up, it was dark, I heard a padlock click and laughing/running. I fell on the fucking bio hazard trash on top of that.

it took 3 hours before someone heard me. they had some big celebration in the building across the street after the clean up, so they didn't hear me till it was over.
>>
>be like 11 or 12
>be that chubby bully kid
>have friends that I fight a lot for fun
>they hang out with me because they wanna be tough
>one day I find a long thin stick.
>proceed to whip one friend very badly with it because I am a cunt
>it breaks his skin
>he is bleeding
>about an hour after the beating
>ate jam on toat for breakfast
>saw a lil chunk of what I assumed was jam on my pants
>was a chubby fuck so scraped it up with my finger nails and ate it
>turns out it was a small chunk of flesh from my friend

yup

true story

the worst part was I really didnt give a fuck once a realised.
>>
i wrote a bomb threat when i was in middle school...
>>
>>561539539
Fucking faggot
>>
>>561539638
I was a weird kid.
>>
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>>561534856
This was me.

But there was this one teacher that people hated, and one time someone pissed in his coffee, all over his desk and on his computer.

In the end it turned out a girl did it.

Many kek's were had.
>>
Threw a stinkbomb into the hallway right before everyone was in the hallway. Still laugh about it
>>
My friend and I were in the same classes but in different sections for science and math. So we each had the same finals. I had math then science, he had science then math. Each of us copies down all the questions to our first final then handed them off so the other could cheat off them.

We each got like D's on the first ones we took and perfect scores on the latter.
>>
>>561539412
dude i get what you're sayin but man... you're one coldass motherfucker, even for /b/
>>
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>>561537326
>>
>>561538002
>>561538387
I'm gonna laugh my ass of at your nigger ass when you marry the girl of your dreams and she does the same thing to you.
Good luck getting divorced, paying child support, and losing your two kids.
Btw, I alreadly seen this happen, dont ask me how but just remember my ID; the date, and this post. Trust it will matter to you 12 years from now, exactly.
>>
>>561536402
>smoking pot in class while in a math final

How ghetto was your school?
>>
had several friends (me included) to piss in a bottle and handle it to some random kid claiming it was some fancy drink. the kid took a sip and almost puked. we got caught and only one of us got punished kek (not me tho)
>>
>>561538002
are you a nigger?
she said studying in Uganda reminded her of your parents
>>
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>>561539412
ya dun hit hard. if you ever get back to your old country, check on her. i'm pretty sure that you're going to find a new "her". not in a good way, tho
>>
>>561535710
>this old ass copy-pasta
>>
Tripped some girl on the bus wearing a dress, not sure why I did it. Felt like an asshole afterwards.
>>
>>561534291
>Senior Year
>I'm president of Speech and Debate
>Freshmen intro day
>Really cute girl there
>She starts to do all the events I do
>Bit strange, I guess she likes me?
>Me and her go to lunch together at a tournament because everyone else was busy
>She says she really likes me
>Later that night I drive her home
>Her parents are out of the country
>She takes me to her room
>Fuck her
The rest of the year was really awkward because I realized that I had sex with someone 4 years younger then me, so I cut it off. We ended up still being friends, we still hang out.
>>
>>561539208
Nope. That would ruin everything

>>561539190
Why would I regret it? It's been almost 4 years and I can have her any second I want. Not like I ever will want her. I live in a different fucking country and I've just graduated. Life is pretty good...no need to go back to BS HS relationship days.
>>
there was this asshole nigger in 2nd grade who stole $20 from me. i found him the next day at the playground and punched him in the face when no one else was near. the impact made his head move back and hit a support column/pole of one the playground equipment(i think it was part of a slide). he wasnt moving on the ground so i just took my money back and the entire playground had a sand floor so i just decided to bury part of him so people wont find him. eventually the teachers found him and apparently he suffered memory loss. Is this just concidence and good luck? No one found out it was me unless i told them the story
>>
in 4th grade i joined in throwing dodgeballs at this weird kid. we made a circle of about 10 kids. that was about it though. I matured and for some reason became very quite. I never got in trouble

Kind of related though - in kindergarten there was a bathroom in my classroom. So I go to take a shit and shit my pants and what not. My teacher had to come in and wipe my ass and stuff it was pretty embarrassing even for being 5 years old. I don't think anyone cared though. Kindergarten rules man
>>
>>561539905
SHIT NIGGA
>>
>>561539684
That gave me the feels, anon. Did you tell anyone who did that to you?
>>
>>561539016
dude are you me
>>
>>561534291
Broke in school for like 4 times during junior high. It was to steal the term test question. I would lead my team, planning for escape routes etc. One time, we even took a camera and sold it off.
>>
>>561535710
>be in 8th grade
>hot chick with the finest ass I've ever seen flirts with me months on end
>one day she pulls me aside after school and shows me a bottle of lube
>starts grabbing my dick and asks if I want to help her use this lube
>I pussy out and leave due to my inexperience with girls


Still regret that shit. She and I are still good friends though, she be grabbing my arms and hugging me a lot since I've beefed up. I will get another chance dammit!
>>
>>561539016
Oh yeah when we moved new school
> this is amazing, we used to party and were purely close just never fucked. Fooled around a lot though
>I walk in the class and tell,"holy fucking shit anon anon" and run at her
> she looks up visibly freaked out then she realizes who I am and said"oh shit it is you anon"
> give her a big hug and start talking, little awkward when I have to explain that yes I am still a student but she laughs it off nicely
> spend that entire class saying naughty and inappropriate things in Spanish when she's asking for examples
> time to pick your Spanish name
> take a name that I know it's slang for some swear words
> teacher just smiles and accepts it
> Mexican kids in my class think I'm hilarious
> rest of class idolized me
>stupid freshmen
>>
>cafeteria
>lunch time
>niggers everywhere
>try to bait niggers with banana on table
>no niggers take bait
>eat banana
>throw peel on ground
>fat ape bitch slips on it with high heels
>nearly breaks her tibia
>all whites laugh
>blacks are all screaming howling cries of war
>slip out of the background into computer science class, giggling to myself like a little bitch
>>
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>sophomore year
>all out brawl with five girls
>disciplinarian office
>told that women should be respected
>fast forward
>senior year
>get close with said five girls
>mfw sexual tension with every single one
>now 25
>still virgin
>mfw
>>
>>561534291
I tried to fart on my friend whilst he was tying his shoe laces. I ended up shiting myself. Luckly he didn't notice. Ended up sitting on the toilet until the end of P.E. Got away with it though...
>>
>>561535869
I didn't even know what a fuck or a bitch was in first grade.

Your parents are shitty parents.
>>
Bullied a chemistry teacher.

>Call him a faggot. Everybody laughs, he stands still, staring in to the void for half a minute.
>Threw some coins when he was teaching us, at his face.
>Took a couple of rotten eggs. I threw it on the writing board, a little came on his face. He turned to us, after a few seconds. He had a few tears.
>Started a snowball fight at him, by throwing one at his chest and calling him Mr. Icedick.

I regret everything. He didn't finish his year at school. He left halfway during the year.
>>
Fapped during math class because teacher's ass was so damn hot.

Some girl noticed me do it and asked me out. I said no.


I can't believe it today.
>>
>>561540348
kek
>>
>Be on Cross Country team
>Take Adderall before race to RUNRUNRUNFAST
>Always win
>Be senior
>Make friends with Freshman Asian kid
>Kid's first big race on Varsity
>Offer kid Adderall. Tell him it will make him faster
>He runs a pretty good race
>"I RAN A GOOD RACE BUT I'M NOT SURE WHAT THE PILLS DID OH MAN I'M SWEATY ARE YOU SWEATY?"
>See kid next morning. He looks like shit
>Tells me didn't sleep all night. Thanks me for pill
>I give him pills for like five more races
>I graduate
>Years later, see a FB post by him admitting he is dropping out of college to go to rehab. Says he's addicted to stimulants
>lol woops
>>
>>561536532
JJJJAAARRRRAAATEE!!
>>
>>561537687
Lonely island pls go
>>
convinced class clown to throw chair out the window from 3rd floor. it somehow managed to break one of the windows below on way down


he got suspended for 3 days.
>>
I hitted guy at 2 grade in the face and after that he left from school and moved somewhere else
>>
>>561540220
Heh no I am me.
>>
I fucked deaf girl in bushes.
>>
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>>561534291
At founders day where the entire school is crowded and there are food stands and shows going everywhere I hunted this short guy in class like a serial killer

>Once I bumped to him I just stood there looking down at him
>serious intent-to-kill face activated
>slowly follow him when he stepped back
>you can see his face nervous and shit
>he keeps looking back at me worried and started sweating
>I keep following the faggot through crowd of people
>feels like a serial killer movie
>he starts to moves through the crowd fast
>eventually lost him due to the crowd blocking my path
>outside school
>I stood outside across the street waiting for him to go out
>sees him looking wary and shit
>I just stood there staring at him like Michael Myers
>he eventually sees me
>acts like he didn't and looks down while nervously walking fast to get picked up by his dad

I didn't even know why I wanted to scare the poor fool, it's like some bully switch activated in me kek
>>
>>561540048
faggot
>>
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>>561538387
was she a qt?
>>
>>561540651
never realized how fucked up that dudes face is
>>
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>>561540631
I guess she didn't hear you coming.
>>
>>561540409
Was his name Petnuch?
>>
>>561537928
fake
>>
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I have so much stuff. I was a little miscreant.

>be in band, grade 7
>put tampon in the pipes of a cornet (trumpet) when nobody is looking
>band director starts conducting
>horn won't play
>kid raises hand and tells the conducter that there is something cloggin his horn
>conductor can't pull valve out to see inside
"No problem, I have a machine that will flush anything out with a jet of water."
>ohgod.png
>conductor goes into office
>hear yelling a few minutes later

Apparently, when the water was being pumped through, not only did it spray everywhere when it hit the clot, but the tampon inflated and did irreperable damage to the horn and a new one had to be purchased. Never got in trouble.

Another:
>grade 8
>found a random bottle of perfume on the floor
>was going up to random buddies and spraying them
"Haha! Now you smell like a girl!"
>spray Jeffery
>his skin starts burning
>blisters
>Jeff goes to the nurse, I go to the office
>waited in there for more than an hour
>medical emergency; ambulance shows up
>he was severely alergic to some chemical in the perfume
>winds up in the hospital for several days
>I get suspended
>mfw he smelled like a girl

Shit was retarded. I have a shitload more if you want to here them.
>>
>Be 14
>Super angsty Communist phase
>Drew giant Swastika on bathroom wall in marker
>Get caughtt by land whale whore math teacher
>Dragged to principal's office
>Sit in silence as I get chewed out by equally as land whalish principal
>She dismisses me
>Open the door, turn around, Nazi Salutes and screams "Heil Hitler" in puberty voice.
>Fucking run for mein fuhrer
>>
>be probably 8 or 9
>new kid moves to town
>become friends
>one day he brings spiderman toy to school
>our elementary school was small (probably only 45-55 kids in K-5)
>school sits on a hill overlooking ballfield
>recess
>ask to borrow spiderman toy
>no.jpg
>grab spiderman toy from him
>throw it into bushes at the bottom of the hill
>not allowed to go to bottom of the hill during school hours
>he runs to recess supervisor
>cries about me throwing spiderman toy
>teacher makes me go get it
>makes me take note home to my parents
>throw note away in stream up the street from my house
>parents get a call about me bringing home a note
>anon, teacher said you had a note for us about something that happened at school
>only time i was ever "grounded" for 3 days

>went over to the kids house and apologized
>a week or so later was hanging out at his house and found a giant human shit in his bedroom
>they moved a couple days after that
>>
>>561535869
...and it accomplished nothing. welcome 2 life.
>>
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>>561540196

it was a teacher and then a groundskeeper to cut the lock or whatever. I told them I fell in and I guess someone accidentally locked it. I wasn't much for story telling back then, talking to anyone gave me panic attacks
>>
>>561538968
That feel good? fucking faggot
>>
>>561540892
No, he had an western - european name.
>>
Got an A- on my Calc 3 midterm
>>
>>561540651
this is a good idea. i have another year to go and my school has these festivities in the gym sometimes. it's a good idea, in case i want to spook off some faggot.
>>
>>561534291

>be in english class
>class goes to computer room to type paper
>me and friend talking like normal people
>bitch on other side tell us to shut up
>she been a bitch all year to us
>me and friend get brilliant idea
>end of class she still writing paper
>bitches back end of computer facing us
>friend unplugs her keyboard
>plugs my keyboard in
>commence alt-f4 spam

she lost her whole paper
no regrets
>>
>>561541205
Nerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrd
>>
>>561534291
>be me
>5th grade
>make friends with kid who had a buttton of pokemon cards
>loved pokemon
>get together and play pokemon cards all the time, trade, play the games, become best friends
>kids in our class come over and bully him
>ironic as they liked pokemon and naruto too
>"hey anon, isnt your friend a faggot, he looks like such a retard kek"
>"heh yeah, what a faggot"
>dont talk to the kid for most of the year until the end of the 5th grade, where i redeemed myself

I have a ton of stories about 5th grade but idk they're worth greentexting
>>
>>561540981
go on
>>
had a public stare down with the headteacher because he was being a little bitch, he walked away and realised he lost then came back and made me go to his office. not really a bad thing tbh, he was a little bitch. also uploaded a pic of some autistic kid with rude captions i can't remember, that was pretty bad
>>
>be in pe
>annoying kid that annoys everyone comes around
>this kid would talk shit then run to the teacher before you can do anything
>everyone's playing soccer
>tell him to be goalie
>everyone commences to kick balls at him as hard as we can
>after about 5 minutes of getting pummeled by balls he hides behind bleachers
>hear him crying
>call him a faggot
>tell him to get his crying ass out of here
>sit on bleachers and chill rest of day cause I don't even play soccer
>>
>>561538968
You're a fucking ass hole.
>>
>>561539731
anon is a comfirmed autist
>>
Well sophomore year I took a girls virginity in the upstairs bathrooms at my school while promising I'd dump my girlfriend and date her this continued 2 months till I was bored. Jr year at same school I bring rubber gloves and vasaline to school and lubed up all the girls bathroom toilet seats on the second floor both wings a few girls fell in and they even called an assembly over it never busted just don't tell anyone not even your friends till later on when it blows over.
>>
>>561537387
Dick.
>>
>>561540702
you made him really upset thanks fag
>>
>be me 2 grade, everyone plays soccer accept me, kids didnt like me. so at the breaks i was always alone.
>one day "i wanna play with you"
>kids say "no". berserkmode activated
>grabed a branch hit ony guy, i stabbed it in another guys eye and after that i broke the nose of the "leader" with a headbutt
>my mom forced me to apologize, did it.
>became best friends with leader
>>
>>561535013
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_L3e3tTFlM
>>
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>>561541832
>>
>like 6th grade
>this kid has skipped two grades and is really young but smart in my class
>also this kid is such a dick
>sitting in class one day behind this kid
>we had some inexpierenced bitch sub
>doesnt know sixth grade science see we can all draw
>fucking kid draws a picture of me sucking dick
>rage.jpeg
>he sees it and takes off
>i chase him around the room for a minute
>he tries to crawl under the teachers desk
>bitch just sits there and watches
>i pull him out from under desk
>smash his head into the ground three or four times
>kid just lies there
>somuchblood.mp3
>decide to just walk out
>get suspended for a week
>kids name is christian
>becomes known as the christian beatdown

Im sorry kid, i was alot bigger than you, and your little was just decapitated infront of you, you didnt deserve it, atleast you were never a dick again
>>
>>561541367
>grade 9
>back in band
>new girl came moved in and was a major feminist bitch
>at least 100 lbs overweight and always a jerk to me and my buddy Gar
>band director was all about age-seniority
>because she was older, she got first pick on everything and a lot of perks
>Gar and I had been sharing a locker for the entire year
>she wanted that one and made us move out of it

From this point forward we made her life a living hell. I honestly don't know if she killed herself or moved away, but she stopped coming to school suddenly and without warning.

Anyway,
>found a bottle of perfume on the floor of the bandhall
>Ineverlearnedmylesson.jpg
>when nobody is around, I pour the entire contents into her French Horn
>it is all just sitting in the tubes
>Gar walks in
"Gar... just follow my lead..."
>Bitch walks in
>I start inhaling deeply on my mouth piece repeatedly
>Gar immitates me, but neither of us say anything
>after a few minutes of confusion:
"What the fuck are you guys doing."
>tell her we aren't doing anything
>she persists
"Ugh! Fine. If you must know, if you inhale into your horn real heavily like this, it gives you a really funny sensation in your lungs. It kind of tickles. I think it's the brass or something."
>Gar adds on:
"I think I'm actually getting a little light headed from this."
>Bitch rolls her eyes and pretends not to care
>eventually she pulls it up to her mouth and takes the biggest breath imaginable
>>
>>561542165
She took so much perfume into her mouth and lungs, I thought she was going to die. She threw up all over the people in front of her and ran to the bathroom, falling over and putting a huge dent in a tuba along the way. When she came back she was too embarrassed to tell on us.

I have more. Especially from band.
>>
>>561539328
>fruitbowl
Fucking beautiful
>>
>be 9 y/o girly me
>have a huge crush on my teacher
>(even today he is an 8/10)
>stayed after class one day
>sits on his lap
>i wiggle around a bit
>teacher says nothing
>puts arms around his neck
>gives him a quick kiss
>puts hand on his dick
>I leave
>class the next day was like nothing happened
>>
I fucked my girlfriend on my accounting teachers desk and wiped cum around his desk so it'd dry.
>>
>>561541242
It was take home...
>>
>>561540260
Another time
> series getting ready to graduate
> I'm not a fucking senior and I am older
> disgruntled
> hear that they have an amazing prank planned
> decide I will have my own pranks
> full three water bottles with milk and ammonia
> systematically squirt them on the ground all through the school as I walk on some super sneaky shit
> whole school smells like rotten eggs from ammonia milk stink bombs
> kids are getting physically I'll from the smell
> leave school and get more stank juice
> return three days later and stink the school up again
Four seniors got blamed for what I did and weren't allowed to cross the stage
>>
>>561534291
> be me
> Middle school
> Half day, not many people show up
> Go to bathroom
> Think about south park
> Shit in urinal
> Sneak away
> Laugh when someone mentions it in class the next day
>>
>be me
>kindergarden
>outside, pe class
>some 5th grader sitting around in the yard with one of his friends, visibly upset about smth
>we were walking around in a circle, and at some point a friend yelled at him "duck!"
>had no idea who he was or why he was called duck
>start yeling duck every time we'd pass him, my friends join in
>at some point he runs off crying, his friend gave me the look and went back in
>never see him around
>mfw i took down a 5th grader while in kindergarden
i can also tell some more stories from middle school and shit. present interest and i will share
>>
>>561535189
Dat Cat!
>ID
>>
>>561542151
**little brother, kid was just in a car avcident two weeks before and his brother was decapitated infront of him
>>
did a bunch of suboxone and puked all over my desk in english class lol
>>
>>561540428
one does not simply start fapping in public and get bitches
>>
>>561542452
PEEN
>>
>>561537387
pretty fucking edgy, doubting you're 21, allow me to sage
>>
>>561541832
In reality they beat a few screws loose in your head, didn't they?
>>
>>561535710
Old copypasta
>>
Smoked some synthetic weed in the bathroom in 11th grade with some bros.

>dat walk back to class
>>
>>561539412
is she a nigger?
>>
>Be 11
>Outside with friends
>One says he has to go pee
>After 10 minutes we are wondering where he is
>I go look for him
>Got his dick stuck in the zipper
>Pee all over his pants
>He asks not to tell anyone
>Says ok
>Go outside says to friends he have peed his pants
>Everyone runs to the toilet and laugh
>His mom comes and pick him up
>Dont see him for a week
>He eventualy forgave me (i think)
>>
>>561534291

always remember, you sit when you want to talk to someone seriously

5.8 here banging chicks with no problems
>>
>>561538387
>Your parents are from Uganda
>She says she did stupid shit

Are you sure she didn't dump you for being a nigger, now she wants to make it up to you because now she feels privileged? Tell her to get off tumblr
>>
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>>561541067
same elementary school

>be same age
>have major crush on girl across the street
>inb4 don't take the girl by tim mcgraw
>she and i have seen each other naked/played doctor
>she starts making fun of me for some reason one day
>lunch and recess outside that day
>sack lunch from home
>tinfoil
>girl still making fun of me - she's on the merry-go-round
>ball up tinfoil
>chuck it at her
>hits her in eye
>screams in pain, thinks shes gone blind
>mfw
>teachers drag me inside
>mom called

also

>year or two after that
>similar to the Recess episode when the teacher hands out all the playballs (basketballs/dodgeballs/soccer/etc)
>recess bell
>teacher outside collecting balls
>still wanting to play basketball
>ANON bring that ball over here
>chuck ball at teacher hard
>hits her in leg
>she goes down
>other students go quiet
>ANON GO TO THE PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE NOW
>fuck, all i did was throw her the ball
>no punishment
>>
>>561542419
>middle school
That South Park is fairly new
Underage b&
>>
>>561542165
Fuckin band nerds.
>>
>>561540981
I have a similar one

> be junior
> end of gym class, finished changing early
> axe body spray was really popular
> found a can on the floor, just happened to have all the materials in my bag to make an axe bomb
> roll that shit into the locker room
> bell rings, I duck out and hear hysterical coughing from down the hall
> middle of next period
> hear sirens
> oh shit
> look outside, some freshman is being loaded up onto an ambulance
> Apparently he had an allergic reaction and passed out, missed like a week of school
> I never got caught and they ended up make gym teachers stand patrol
>>
>>561538387
Anon i'm begging here, make her your personal sex slave and black mail her saying how terrible of a person she was when she was 17. You could have a personal sex slave that will do anything you ask.
>>
I made a mom joke towards my friend who's mom just died
>>
i made a joke during school announcements about down syndrome. they said "we have a special announcement about our friends with down syndrome" and i laughed because they said special.
>>
>Be me in primary school (so yah England btw)
>year4/5 at the time so I was 9 or 10
>We have this stupid evil bitch teacher every once in a while, I swear to fuck she is devils incarnate
>Funnily enough her shadow on the wall looked like an actual witch and witches do often get burned XD
>So one day everyone in the class is having fun throwing shit
>bitch teacher engages killjoy mode like every other day
>fuckingdevilbitch.jpg
>Decide to take justice into my own hands
>I open my desk drawer and reach around for the one object I know can slay the mighty beast
>A fake maggot idk why I still had it it had been sat in my desk getting sticky and had a load of dust and dirt stuck to it
>anyhow I decide the maggot will be her demise and demise it was
>From the back of the classroom where I sat I launched the fake maggot
>FKIN BAM HEADSHOT REKT FAGET
>The maggot lands on the side of her head and is stuck there nicely
>class starts freaking out
>I get snitched up by one girl who seen it, doesn't surprise me stupid fucking sandnigger bitch
>So anyhow I get in some trouble and later find out that the teacher couldn't get the fake maggot out and had to cut her hair
>That brought me great happiness as she looked like a fucking tard now
>I'm praised by many, hailed as a hero
>didn't see much of that teacher afterwards
>rekt

I also called another fat bitch teacher who pissed me off in primary school Jabba the Hut rekt fagget
>>
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>>561537928
the fuck is this
>>
>>561535869
edgy br0
>>
>10th grade
>New chemistry teacher
>Has no idea how to teach
>Spend months on week long lessons
>Students basically run the class
>Everyone constantly insults and disrespects her
>One day we all agree to just sit still and be quiet out of nowhere
>We all coordinate
>Suddenly its time
>Class goes dead silent
>Nobody moves anything, except our heads as we follow her with locked on eye contact
>She has a break down and is escorted out
>tfw she was fired
>lulz had
>>
>>561542887
HOLY FUCKING SHIT!

THIS NIGGA A DETECTIVE!!!

AWWW SHIT YEAH

FUCKING DEDUCTION

SOME SHERLOCK HOLMES SHIT GOIN ON RIGHT HERE!
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>>561534291
>sprayed graffiti in and putside school & also on railways
>get caught and fucked by police and having major consequences in school as well
>principal wants to call my parents
>she goes over into another room and calls my father
>i panick and jump out of the window and run away

well i kinda returned after a few days since no money and hungry. had to put up with the shit i did

>principal was fired
>mfw
>>
>bully emo kid
>decide to take full advantage
>threaten to beat the shit out of him if he doesn't suck my dick every day
>as expected, he does so every day
>a few months pass
>he's sucking my dick as usual
>blow load on his face
>he breaks down crying and says he loves me
>fucking smack that faggot across the face
>avoid him completely
>he stops going to school shortly afterward
>never hear about him again

I'm sorry, Jason.
>>
>>561540993
kek
>>
>>561542919
>in band at football game
>in bleachers, waiting for halftime or other gametime songs
>crickets everywhere, hitting us in the face, flying around annoying as fuck
>Bitch is terrified of crickets
>Gar puts a cricket in the nozzle to her water bottle
>I put a cricket in her mouth piece
>Gar puts crickets in her bib
>I put as many crickets as I can find in her hat
>she goes to play her horn and the cricket jumped right into her mouth
>she was so startled, she swallowed it
>Bitch starts screaming and crying and goes for her water bottle
>doesn't even look at it because she's so desperate to wash the last cricket down
>swallows the other cricket
Gar and I are laughing our asses off at this point
>the directors come by and tell her that it's against the rules not to have her hat and plume on
>she was so intimidated that she scrambled to put it on without looking
>bitchneverlearnseither.exe
>as she's lifting it up over her face, about 50 crickets get dumped all over the front of her face and into her clothes

She was freaking out so bad that she actually passed out and had a seizure right there in the stands. We weren't laughing anymore, but I still chuckle when I think about it. We didn't get in trouble either because there were so many crickets around everyone thought it could have just been a coincidence.

Typing up more.
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>>561541587
>pummeled by balls
kek
>>
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Spending my last months of high school in the attic doing drugs every day. Alone.
>>
>>561538387

She obviously wants the D, just respond
>>
>>561539539
>Fucking the retard instead of having your bros give you a nice anal fuck

Are you gay or something?
>>
>>561537387
>I get a message or email every holiday and my birthday
fuck you man
she sounds like a total sweetheart
>>
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>>561543346
Wow dude, uhm. That might have been a little over the top. Youre a faggot. kek
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>>561542887
tat episode is pretty old ok
>>
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>be me
>in preschool
>i was playing house with this chick with blue eyes
>everyone liked her so i felt like the tits at the time
>random ass nigga called geo steps in and tries stealing mai waifu
>no one likes geo cuz hes bigger than everyone else also hes an entitled nigger
>if he wanted your juice he would yell like an ape until he got it
>he says im the baby and hes the daddy now
>ohhellfuckingnawww.mp4
>i leave
>hes still trying to get at mai waifu
>my older brother watched evangelion
>i would watch it sometimes
>i saw how unit 01 went ape shit and started to maul niggas just going straight up salvage
>i grab the teachers fountain pen
>i go back
>i push him down
>i fucking stab him as hard as my feeble little pre-schooler arms allow me to
>over and over
>im just going apeshit
>the pen breaks
>still on him i start scratching him and biting him
>geo is screaming in absolite horror as im ripping chunks of flesh with my mighty jaw muscles and razor sharp jagged pre-schooler teeth
>geo stops screaming and passes out
>GGGGAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYOOOO.jpeg
>i let out my victory screech
>everyone is in absolute horror
>teacher comes in
>starts tripping shit

>the teacher had my back cuz he hated geo
>he says geo provoked me
>mfw victory screech
>mfw i got off scott free cuz i had to be monitored for rabies
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>>561542950
Anon you made nerve gas.
>>
>>561542804

>Be 13
>First day of music class
>Teacher ask me first for my name
>Tell someone elses name
>Everyone follows
>Start ask "Matt" do that etc...
>Someone else does it
>What the fuck is going on she says
>Keep doing this for weeks
>Eventualy one days she starts crying and runs out
>Never see her again
>She transfered to another school
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>be me
>2nd last day of grade 8
>faggot kid lets call him Mark was a dick to me
>he was also a trouble maker and no one liked him
>teacher and him go out in the hall to have a talk
>this is my time to strike
>grab one of those big ass hand sanitizer bottles and start unloading it on around and in his desk
>teacher and him come back in
>MFW they see his desk

no one ever told him or the teacher it was me
>>
>Be me
>Highschool, 2011
>17 M
>Horny lil' fuck, get girlfriend
>Never fucked before
>Goodie.jpg
>Fuck her everyday, multiple times, stand up doggy
>During school hours, take her in the woods
>Cum buckets on her belly evrytiem
>One day horny extreme hornieness kicks in
>Take her to Music room in my school during class
>Dark, emergency door behind us, Double doors infront (Behind those doors is a stage/classroom
>No one in class, pitch black
>Small room inbetween the classroom and outside doors
>Start fingering her, she sucks me
>Begin fuckening
>Stand-up doggy against wall
> pounding away and not paying attention, feels too good
>Look to my left randomly, look in a small window that is in the door to the stage/classroom
>Ohfuck.jpg
>See brand new music teacher, hot as fuck ginger, about 6 ft tall starring in at us
>GF doesn't notice
>I keep going, starring this bitch in the eyes
> she sees me clear as day
>Turns around, and exits class room
>Imsofucked.jpg
>Nope
>Continue life, never hear from anyone about it
>teacher talks to me more now tho, never bringing it up
>Best year of my life
>>
>be me 14yo with friends
>found a small frozen lake behind school
>call a 12yo guy
>tell him to skate on it
>ice breaks
>kid fall In frozen water
>dont let him climb
>laugh
>>
> be 7
> friend with girl
> she has some health problems
> one day at the bus she told me she cant fall down because then she would have to have a surgery
i was 7 seven so i didnt uderstand very well what problem she had and she didnt explain it very well
> one day we were playing
> she was running by my side
> idont know why i tripped her with my foot
> she fell down and cried
> i contnued runnig and realized what i have done
> after that she was always missing school because of surgeries
> and she was always on crutches
she never blamed me and some years after she changed from school
>>
told a simple kid i killed santa
he was also black
double points
>>
>>561543256

Episode aired in 2006.

8 years ago.

Unless he was he skipped a grade in elementary school he's good.
>>
>>561542434
>be me, 6th grade
>tech ed class
>fucking idiot old man
>i sit with my friends, the edgy ones
>at some point, when he was pissed by my friends i say "fried cocaine"
>"APREUTESEI GET OUT, I AM TAKING YOU TO THE PRINCIPAL"
>he called a security dude to make sure i would wait there and not wander off
>class was in the basement so i hid under the stairs
>fucking idiot came and looked for me but i was nowhere to be found
>teacher forgets this. next time in his class, he didn't say anything.
edgy
>>
>be in 7th grade just started masturbating
>be stuck cleaning gym for in school suspension punishment
>our gym was a separate building about
500 feet from main school building
>no supervisors present so me, Serbian exchange student, and football player force annoying kid to do all the cleaning or we'd beat him with brooms
>only other person there was a 9th grade girl on the basketball team practicing her free throws
>me and football player guy wander around messing with shit and eating snacks from snack bar
>notice girl is gone so I get this burst of courage and go into girls locker room
>hear shower going and pull out my dick masturbating to the thrill of it all
>know I could get totally fucked over since this is a religious school and they make a huge ass deal about "sexual misconduct"
>all of a sudden I realize she's not in the shower yet the water has been running
>at the same moment that I realized, she walked from the locker area naked across the shower room
>I froze in place, my hand still on my exposed dick
>she just comes over and caresses my dick and says she won't tell anyone if I don't
>she had small tits and an average face but she gave me a great bj
>didn't know yet, but this girl was a total slut, she gave an hj to a teacher the next year.
>>
>>561544061
Because everyone started watching south park in 2006.
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