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Ask a guy who's about to kill himself anything
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The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
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Thread replies: 255
Thread images: 59
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Ask a guy who's about to kill himself anything
>>
Why.
>>
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Shooped, noone has propane tanks or balloons.
>>
Why is there a balloon?
>>
>>552350826
Do you like cake?
>>
>>552350826
don't do it man. Seriously. When you kill yourself, life is over, you don't think or feel.
Whatever is troubling you, ignore it. Life is better than death, no matter how shitty life is.
Trust me anon. I'm not some whiteknight faggot or some summerfag.
>>
livestream?
>>
>>552350826
where'd you get the tank? no access to a gun or a potentially lethal fall, so i'm considering this.
>>
have you tried smoking weed?
>>
>>552351115
this
>>
>>552350826
topkek
>>
>>552350826
Smoke DMT first
>>
will you livestream it?
>>
I guess the obvious question is...why kill yourself?
>>
>>552350826
Why would you kill yourself when you can dedicate your life to making others happy?

Why are you going to end it?
>>
>>552350826
Stream it!
>>
>>552351115
get out fag

just do it OP, post live stream
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>>552351014
Because why not, going to die anyway right?
>>
>>552350826
Stream it faget
>>
>>552350826
Where?
>>
>>552351325
Why would you want to make others happy?
>>
>>552350826
Why arent you raping women?
>>
>>552351159
>>552351024
you can buy baloon kits at walmart that have a helium tank inside
>>
>>552350826
Are you white? Then please, let no one stop you.
>>
>>552351182
this
> captcha 2420
> 420
>>
>>552350826
what did you get for your last birthday
>>
can I have everything you own?
>>
Don't do it, but if you do, livestream it you'll be famous
>>
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>>
>>552350826
Why are you bothering us with your shit op? Nobody gives a fuck really.
>>
>>552351102
It's his birthday.
>>
>>552351343
OP seriously don't listen to this cancer. Don't kill yourself OP, live.
>>
Why don't you get a credit card and live it up first? Just kiling yourself seems a waste.
>>
>>552351454

So OP, are you going to blame someone? Surely there must be someone to blame for your suicide?
>>
>>552351475
>cancer
I don't think you know what that means.
>>
Why aren't you raping teenage girls?
>>
You will never be a supreme gentleman, OP
>>
>>552351454
Fake.

Helium isn't even real.

2/10
>>
>>552350826
soo....what are you doing with your life?
>>
Don't do, op no, stahp life good, dead bad live ples for thw wurl...don't go
>>
Don't kill yourself. Do some drugs. Killing yourself is like making it so you never existed.
>>
How exactly are you feeling right now OP? Just remember, in 70 years you will be dead forever. 70 years is nothing to infinity
>>
>>552350826
What method are you going to use?

Inert gas asphyxiation?
>>
>>552351559
>>552351680
Lol what.
>>
>>552351519
Why would he want a reason to live for when hes gonna kill himself?
>>
>>552351703
How do you know you'll be dead forever? Everything you've ever experienced could all be a dream and when you die, you just go to another dream.
>>
>implying helium kills the man

You just get a super-funny voice, idiots.
>>
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>>552351624
>>
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>>552351624
>Fake.
>Helium isn't even real.
>2/10

How can balloons be real if helium isn't real?
>>
Don't do it. Start a fresh, move somewhere new, you do whatever you want, there's no reason to do it.
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>>552351810
I'm willing to bet things will be for me just like they were in 1914
>>
Where are you from?
>>
>>552351812
It displaces the oxygen in your body without the pain of suffocation, which comes from carbon dioxide build up
>>
>>552351387
So nobody else makes an exit bag. Helium shortage, dude. We need that shit for keeping lab equipment cool.
>>
hello
there's a high chance that you might die if you commit suicide
dying is not good
thanks
>>
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>>552351825
What if the real isn't even helium?
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>>552351941
Will you buy me a balloon first?
>>
>>552351282
>>
>>552351941
You won't be able to it with that amount. Don't do it
>>
>>552351941
lol where did u read that? internet?
>>
I agree with the credit card also why not "test drive" the sickest car and go nuts first. Easy achieved good luck
>>
>>552351941
Livestream?
>>
take the last of your money and get a bunch of hookers and fuck yourself to death.
>>
>>552351941
have you ever tried some drugs OP? serious question
>>
>>552351396
lies
>>
>>552352117
Its Inert gas asphyxiation. Its real people die without knowing it. Happens all the time at farm storage. Farmers die without knowing it.

Support:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=176eog7mZjc
>>
>>552352025
will it take off?
>>
>>552352232
/thread
>>
>>552352232 this
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>>552352039
>>552352039
I'll Make you a balloon, what do you want it to say?
>>
>>552351941
explain the funny voice then
>>
>>552352117
The Exit Bag is a real thing dude.
>>
>>552350826
Happy birthday
>>
>>552350826
buy me a game before killing yourself and made my week better ;_;
>>
>>552352305
helium is directly related to the size of your testicles and your overall buoyancy
>>
OP, if you're sure you want to, don't listen to these guys. Just make sure you DO kill yourself, instead of stopping halfway through, or failing completely, and ending up a vegetable.

Also, if you livestream you will live on in /b/ fame

And who's to say he hasn't already blown all his money on a fantastic last few months.

>>552352305
I think it tightens the vocal chords or something.
>>
>>552352303
Please write "David's Balloon" on it.
No one has ever got me a balloon before.
>>
your family will suffer for the rest of their life, op. my sister did it and it just fucking sucks. go meet some girls or something and make your life worth living
>>
>>552352437
(´???`)
>>
>>552352275
>Its Inert gas asphyxiation. Its real people die without knowing it. Happens all the time at farm storage. Farmers die without knowing it.

Makes ya wonder why they don't execute murderers with that technique, they would be gone within a minute and no IV, no drugs, no pain or stress.
>>
>>552352303

Life is for the living, OP. Some people are born and die when they are 20 only to be buried 60 years later, no one will ever mourn you the way you want them to but you can make them by living first.
>>
>>552352305

no, your voice appears to change because sound propagates differently throught different mediums.

on other planets with different atmospheres your voice would sound completely different than you think it does on earth.
>>
>>552350826
lol its my birthday today and some guy wants to kill himself. HAHAH
>>
Firstly don't dieting isn't cool anymore and life is special. Also you will just pass out and your body will naturally close the airway to prevent the poison resulting in retardism.
>>
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OP is kill
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>>552352064
>>552352117
ITT: biologically impaired
>>
I know i can't allure you from doing this, but you seem like a nice guy and i wonder which problems you have, that you have to kill yourself. I thought about killing myself multiple times, but i said to myself: "fuck it. fuck you, fuck everything, dont fuckin do this. Your live is worth more than your death. You deserve to live, you're chosen to live, no matter what people say". That helped me alot.

Hope you didn't kill yourself already. After reading this, overthink it. It's not my problem, if you choose your death, but i'd be relieved if you don't do it.
>>
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>>552352437
>>
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>>552350826
do it this way like in this gif, instant death
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>>552352636

>your body will naturally close the airway to prevent the poison resulting in retardism

either he breathes helium and dies and breathes nothing and dies
>>
>>552352732

OP, no lo hagas. En serio, no vale la pena. En lugar de suicidarte intenta hacer algo que siempre te ha gustado.
Escapa de todo, hac un viaje largo, vive experiencias nuevas, olvida lo que ha pasado.
>>
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>OP kills self
>"gonna die anyway right?"
>fast forward 50 years
>biological immortality discovered
>OP is kill
>everyone else still alive forever
>mfw
>>
>>552352416
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JjJOS0BpgnM
>>
>>552352732
Will you make me two boob ballons, then tape them to your chest and write #Shrekt above the left tit? Thanks OP! No one's ever made me balloon tits before
>>
>>552352648
How's he doing, still in the ICU?
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>>552351941
You pass out before you can get close to dying retard. Just blow up the helium tank. Go out with a bang!
>>
>>552352732
now one where is written Parsa
t-thanks ;_;
>>
>>552350826
You are very lucky I happened to come across this thread. Listen to me and listen to me very carefully.

You will not like what comes after death, and it will make your life right now look like a walk in a beautiful garden.

In year 8047 bc, the war between the people on the land(what you call humans), and the war between the undersea folk starts. Shit gets real, lots of people die, me being one of them. I was floating in the water, dead, when it came to me. I don't know why I was chosen, but, I have seen beyond this world. The god Czernobog came to me and in exchange for acting as his living proxy, I was granted multiple powers, and life.

It hurts me to see kids like you condemn yourselves to the next life. If you have not fulfilled your duties as a human, which are to survive until you reproduce, and until your offspring reproduces, the place you go to will not be pretty.
>>
>>552352749
You don't die jumping into water, stupid. It's not like you're hitting concrete.
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>>552352749
he survived actually
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>>552352732
IS today your birthday? It's mine too. Do not kill yourself man
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>>552352801
/this
>>
>>552352749
You're fucking stupid. It's just water. Not like he's jumping off a tall building and hitting solid concrete. Faggot.
>>
>>552350826
why are you going to kill yourself ?
>>
Oh, and make sure you blame some real scum of humanity for your misery (assuming you're killing yourself because of depression and not like "You have a cancer b0ss, you have 3 months to live in agony")

>>552352510
I imagine a large container of cyanide, that you might get hundreds of executions out of, is cheaper than a tank of gas, that you're gonna need quite a lot of
>>
Hey OP! Can you make a balloon that says "Maribel's Balloon."? That'd be great. c:
>>
>>552352749
requesting somebody posts the pasta that goes with this gif
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>>552352904
>guranteed replies
>>
>>552352851
lol
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>>552352305
because it has something to do with the physics of wave or something like it travels faster in helium then in air
>>
>>552352732
please write "Grga suicid za tebe!"
>>
>>552352927
Sure
>>
We'll miss you :c
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>>552352749
>instant death
are you retarded? it's water, nothing would of happened to him
>>
>>552351303

Why live?
>>
Can you please write on the balloon " J Beutel is an faggot" cheers also stream urself suiciding
>>
>>552352909
>I imagine a large container of cyanide, that you might get hundreds of executions out of, is cheaper than a tank of gas, that you're gonna need quite a lot of

cyanide death is very painful, its basically like drowning and you feel it to the last second.

Inert gas puts you to sleep quickly
>>
>>552352989
Make a balloon with a face on it!
>>
>>552352510
The helium exit bag is the poor man's gas chamber. The government just has access to better gasses than you
>>
>>552352807

>implying immortality is something good

OP, two final question:
1. How will you do it?
2. Where is the stream?
>>
What was the greatest moment of your life?
>>
>>552352870
Bait detected
>>
>>552352749
>water
>instant death

are you fucking retarded, water is LIQUID, he would suffer little to no damage
>>
>>552352989
Make me a balloon saying:
"No gods or kings only man"
>>
>>552350826
Why are you being such a pussy? Just shut the fuck up and do it, nobody gives a shit about you.
>>
>>552351941
Don't do this OP, inhaling helium creates mustard gas and it could kill you.
>>
Doesn't that kind of helium tank have too much oxygen added for this?
>>
>>552351259

Why would you use kek instead of lol? Think about it. It doesn't mean anything. It's just the modification of the actual acronym lol. You don't even know why you use it. Somewhere, sometime you saw a few people post it and hopped right on board. Too mainstream for lol, right? That's so old. Its meaning makes sense but you don't feel comfortable expressing your approval of things on the internet with the common old "lol" that's been around for so long. You'll man up and use the purposely misspelled version with no discernible humor or purpose besides making you look like a complete idiot while you maintain the false concepts that other people find it amusing or appropriate and that using purposely misspelled words shows the world that you're not afraid of anything and are part of some grand inside joke that no one finds funny. There's a lot going through your head, but you realize I am right. You will try, though, to get the best of this exchange. What are you going to go for? Newfag? Summer? Oh damn tere are so many options to choose from. An implication that I’m underage perhaps? That’s always fresh. Maybe you’ll just shut down. I think you should go with something abobut butthurt or being mad or even comment on the length of the unproportionally long comment that so swiftly brought to your attention that you are a faggot that tries oh so hard to fit in. Careful though, is this even OC? Tsk tsk, hard to say. Don’t want to get embarrassed, Anon. I’m sure you could find some grammar or spelling errors as a last resort. I can’t wait, it’s always fun playing insult roulette.
>>
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>>552350826
So how does this work, exactly? You inhale propane then light a match? That's hardcore, bitch. Damn.
>>
>>552350826
how much does your kit cost anon?

if it fails i beg of you to post so that i buy a rope instead
>>
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>>552352904
>pic related
>>
>>552352996
More bait
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>>552352870
>>552352904
It's just like concrete at a high enough altitude you dumb fucking faggots. The surface tension of the water would cause him to break everybone in his body if not kill him. Can't dive though. Go for the bellyflop OP.
>>
is that you kyle barton. kill yourself
>>
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>>552352927
>>
>>552353204
lol
>>
>>552353127
Immortality is fucking fantastic. You can see so much, and time is no longer important at all.
>>
>>552353157

Keep trolling, yeah.
>>
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>>552352989
can you maybe like not kill yourself and make balloon requests, a bit like the humiliation german
>>
>this is now a make me a baloon thread
>OP will found out that making baloons is fun
>OP will start to make baloons for small children
>because of the joy of small children he will be happy in his life, and will live until the age of 80
>>
>>552353204
topkek is a Turkish snack food.
topkek
Kek
themoreyouknow.jpg
>>
>>552350826
oh and..

>Unable to extract some or all of the EXIF data,
>which may have been removed from the image
>file.

Damn you. /b/ damn you.
>>
>>552352989
no more balloons asshole, we're here to watch you die, post livestream or gtfo
>>
>OP uses all his helium for making balloons for his fellow anons
>won't an hero
>mission accomplished

Is that /b/'s new way of saving lifes?
>>
tylenol overdose, completely painless
>>
>>552353157
The bait never ends :D

>>552353273
Oh look a fish got caught
>>
>>552353294
Now livestream killing self and we make u king of /b/
>>
>>552353204
U R a faggot
>>
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>>552353294
Could you write "Before I an hero, have a balloon, Codey"
>>
>>552352732
Thanks c:
>>
>>552353294
>>552353001
pls
>>
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>>552351159
>>
Thank you OP, don't kill yourself :c I love the balloon I really do!
>>
>>552351102
to prove that it's really helium
>>
OP are you doing balloon animals too?
>>
Op, dont waste so much helium in making balloons for everyone. Just go ahead and kill yourself, or if you continue with this, you might end up in a hospital as a vegetable with brain damage because you didnt had enough helium to die
>>
>>552353365
lol topkek
>>
atleast livestream it
>>
kill yourself op
stream it

pussy
>>
>>552353204

>top kek
>my sides
>>
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OP is a summerfag. This shit is fake as fuck. Happy birthday faggot. Save me some cake cause I'll be hungry after I'm done plowing your mom later.
>>
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>>552353001
>>
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OP, can i have a balloon with "Michellen's Balloon" in it?
>>
>>552353446
This is honestly really sweet... I agree OP. As much as I like discussing the sciences of suicide with people.
>>
>>552351159
Amazon
>>
>>552353294
OP can you please write "Grga suicid za tebe!" and post pic with balloon near the tank. You would make o bunch of ppl happy!
>>
>>552350826
Stay cool bc ur propane bomb won't kill you unless ur dead already
>>
No Ballz.
>>
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>>552352025
What helium real isn't even the if?
>>
>>552352998
you have many millions of years, available being dead. but you only have about 80 years alive. why kill yourself?
>>
>>552353571
Ok an hero nao
>>
>>552353446
gay
>>
OP

Listen to me or suffer for the rest of the foreseeable future.
>>
OP is this actually going anywhere?

>>552353571
Also, might I have a balloon with "You win again, gravity!" on it?
>>
>>552353578
no I want to see death (natural selection) the purpose of life is just to merely exist, by killing himself he's being a tard also im assuming hes not black what a shame...
>>
>>552352510
I think the helium method only works when you breathe in only helium and no air at all. For someone who wants to kill himself, it can be done with enough preparation and because that person wouldn't struggle against it. However try doing that with someone who struggles against it, this becomes nearly impossible.
>>
OP, can you please make a balloon that says Casey has a big wiener.

Thanks much and good luck on the suicide
>>
>>552350826
OP will not deliver suicide
>>
>>552350826
fill up enough of those helium balloons and just float away from your problems
>>
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>>552350826
Be a man, do it right.
>>
>>552353571
OP you do realize that all these people wanting balloons in here don't really care about you
you do realize that don't you?
>>
>>552353709
Stop wasting OP's He supply
>>
>>552353670
>you have many millions of years, available being dead

Imma need some BIG FAT SAUCE on that, please!
>>
>>552353294
Haqim's balloon OP? I will an hero too. this picture will be very meaningful to me anon
>>
>>552353571
OP can you write "Death is liberation. Thank you Elmo." on a balloon?
>>
>>552353682
ur ghey >:c
>>
>>552353571
"No gods or kings only man"
>>
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>>552350826
You're not going to kill yourself faggot all you want is eeeeteeenteriooon go fuck yourslef faggot
>>
>>552353796
Shut the fuck up. Balloons are cool man.

>>552353408
I like the color Red OP. Also, you gonna stream it or what?
>>
>>552353313

Immortality sucks as you get sick of life. Life is repetitive, sometimes boring. Your body may live on, but your brain gets old. There's no escape.
>>
>>552350826
>>
>>552351303
Why do anything? Life is just an endless cycle of shit and happiness, do yourself a favor and enter the void of eternal nothing, no gain, no loss. Forever peace.

>>552351387
>dedicate your life to make others happy
in other words do boring shit with no results.
Acquire gun, get high score motherfucker.

>>552351392
this. if you're about to die, at least go get laid. That's probably the reason you want to kill yourself for anyways, you might not get high score but at least rape a bunch of people and get that out of your system
>>
>>552353792
RIP in peace Ricardo. You'll be remembered my brother.
>>
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>>552353571
Thanks OP
Don't kill yourself, even if you live without a reason for a while eventually you should find one.
>>
I left for 20mins and your still alive? Fuckin do it you puss jive turkey bitch of a human being!
>>
>>552353682
even if he is gay at least he is trying to make op feel better meh.
>>
>>552353814
I have a few tanks
>>
>>552353935
mental prep aint easy
>>
>>552352976
crna macka beli macak?
>>
>>552353952
Then do it livestream already
>>
make a balloon that says "Have a good time fishing Jon" PLEASE ANON
PLEASE
PLZ
pls
>>
>>552353879
Balloons are cool, and so is OP. I hate when people be such faggots because some guy is brightening other peoples days. :c
>>
Get a fuckload of balloons, fill them all up with your helium supply, then turn on the song "pop goes the world" by Men Without Hats, and dance erratically in your room full of balloons.
>>
>>552353935
How do I librates on smartphone?
>>
>>552353952
why didn't you fill the entire room with balloons then by now?
>>
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>>552353224

Yes. Yes that's exactly how this works.
>>
OP just wants to talk to people
>>
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>>552353952
get one that says moe's balloon. :) thanks
>>
Make a balloon for me with something written on it plox
and dont kill yourself. rob a bank first c:
>>
>>552353578
Please OP, do it? you would make me so happy ;/
>>552353952
>>
Has anyone actually delivered a live stream of an hero on /b/?
>>
Why not use that tank to make hundreds of balloons and go and hand them to children in the park for free. See their happy faces. Then tell me you want to die
>>
>>552353796
Who gives a shit, bro. Fuck your bad vibes. We want balloons. It'd be keen if you could do a balloon that says "Harman", OP
>>
>>552354070
Live stream

>>552354162
What color?
>>
>>552354070

Can you make a balloon that says "I'll miss you Brent" then tell us the story of why you are doing it/suicide note?
>>
You're still here posting balloons requests.
Face it OP, you don't really want to kill yourself, you would have done it alread instead of wasting your time on /b/.

But that's a good thing.

Really, don't do it.
>>
>>552354058
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3zUUtf7gOe8
>>
>>552354179
I don't think so. Only that one faggot who burned himself.. survived tho
>>
>>552354179
toaster steve, but he lived
>>
My id is purple and you're all gay.
>>
>>552354205
Green, if you don't have it, you choose the color
also, thanks OP ;)
>>
>>552353884
There are books to read, and a world to see. How can the mind grow old if there is new information to keep it fresh?
Don't you want to see everything?
>>
>>552350826

DO it Op.... Don't listen to all these little faggot white knights.

I believe in you, you will become a true hero, we will not forget you Mr. Helium

An hero, let it all go.
>>
>>552350826
op just turn 360 degrees and walk away
>>
>>552354137
This OP, fuck the world before you off yourself. Hell try to rack up a new high score and do what Elliott cuntface couldn't do get laid.
>>
>>552353952
Assuming this isn't just a prolonged troll, why do you want to kill yourself (since this was supposed to be an AMA)?

>>552354241
what about that guy who hanged himself from a door or something? gif does the rounds here occasionally
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jQYQTFudrqc

do you have any different colour balloons, OP?
>>
>>552352732
Can I have a balloon that says "Carson's ballon"?
>>
OP ive waited for a long time
get on with it
>>
>>552354294
>>552354205
This OP. If you an hero successfully livestream with helium you will be legacy
>>
>>552352616
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u19QfJWI1oQ&sns=em
>>
>>552353884
Wow, you sure think far, little man.
>Implying we won't fix "getting bored" by then
>>
>>552354263
Look who it is again, ID J1ja51hR . I'm fed up with your shit faggot. The other day when you called me a newfag, yeah, haven't forgotten about that yet.
Fuck you I've been on here for months and probably get on here more than you anyways. Don't you know that you make yourself look like a newfag when you call others newfag?
Just because you learned how to hack your name and change it to "J1ja51hR" does not give you the right to disrespect anyone at any time.
>>
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>>552353823
either you have an infinite amount of time being dead, if the universe keeps expanding, or stops, but doesnt collapse. if it collapses, it will do so in approx. 10 billion years. rhen rhe space-time continuum collapses and there isnt such thing as passing time. so you have at least 10 billion years available being dead.
>>
>>552354334
I know the gif, not sure where it's from.
>>
op, can i have a balloon with "Natalia <3" in it?
>>
>>552354443
then what will happen
>>
I thought this was a suicide thread, but now i see its actually a 'ill make you a balloon' thread
>>
>>552354443
i was told there was no maths :(
>>
>>552354492
Your GF?
Beaut name
>>
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>>552353884
>implying i won't be able to shitpost and play vidiya for a thousand years
>>
> Make a bunch of balloons
>write hilarious shit on all of them
>let them fly to the roof
>an hero

>people find body with a bunch of blown up balloons with shitty puns and what not on them
>Best day ever
>>
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>>552354435
I've been blessed by Heaven the god of newfags himself.
How nice
>>
>>552350826
Grow up man. It's beta as fuck to an hero.
>>
IF OP PUTS THE MASK ON, WILL HE DIE?
>>
>>552354186
This.
Or just do like "Up" in a garden chair and see how high into the cosmos you get
>>
>>552351624
>>552351825
This fucking kek
>>
>>552354576
lmao he posted slightly editted copypasta newfag
>>
>>552354587
Fuck off cancer
>>
>>552354587
lol..

>implying it doesn't require courage to kill yourself and embrace afterlife
>>
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>>552354576
I will follow you forever. I know your IP.

Piss me off and I'll dox you.
>>
>>552354673
b8
>>
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Don't do it OP
>>
>>552354628
IT WOULD BE EXTREMELY PAINFUL
>>
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Imma chime in here as a whitknight and say, OP, don't kill yourself. Instead, if you want to escape so much, go out innawoods or the desert or some shit, find god, attain enlightenment.
>>
>>552354673
when did this start? i reckon it was when id's came back shortly after?
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