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Poorfag/Joblessfag here. I have no money, no food, but a glo
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Poorfag/Joblessfag here. I have no money, no food, but a glorious voice and will say anything you want me to for money. Hell, I'll even say it for free. I don't give a shit.

I'm about to get kicked out of my apartment, and this is my last ditch effort to scrounge up enough cash to not get kicked out.

paypal:
[email protected]
>>
>>529069782
Sample of my voice

https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/voice1
>>
>>529069782
I'll even read a fucking story about Mario shitting in Yoshi's mouth if you want
>>
>>529069782
say "back in the summer of 1973, my friends and i used to play ball at the park in our neighborhood. little johnny had the best pitch while pete had that strong swing. we were probably the best little league team in our neighborhood. but then everything changed once the fire nation attacked." for free
>>
I'm broke too or else I'd donate, but how the hell are you not on the radio or some shit?
>>
>>529069782
Or jerk off on my microphone and record it

>>529071436
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/1973-1

>>529071557
I wish I was on the radio, and I've even sent in voice clips and resumes to the local stations, but no response.
>>
>>529069782
holy shit your voice is awesome
>>
>>529072062
i liek you OP youre cool
>>
>>529072170
Thank you. It's all I've got going for me right now.
>>
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You should stream vidya games on Twitch until you can get partnered. I would highly enjoy chilling out listening to someone with a voice like yours. There are a few streamers with decent voices I know of, but not quite as chill as yours.

Pic related: It's what you should do.
>>
Wow that really is a fantastic voice. You lucky bastard.
>>
>>529072062
ok say "it aint no fun if the homies cant have none"
>>
>>529072298
I actually do stream on twitch, usually on weeknights from 10pm to 1am

I've got a mere 40 followers on twitch at the moment, but no idea on how to get partnered
>>
>>529072447
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/aint-no-fun
>>
Say "Master Y I, you suck donkey dicks. Big big donkey dicks"
>>
>>529072496
Post a link, dude. I'll follow for sure.

And you just need a stable viewership. Advertising like this should work.
>>
>>529069782
weren't you on tv a couple of years ago..?

what happend?
>>
good voice op good voice!
man I have some weird scenario here, my voice is normal, but when I use the mic all girls starts hitting on me, too bad I'm a fat fuck though. would help if I could but I'm in the ditch too, good luck man
>>
And if that doesn't pan out for you, you're going to need to head on over this way.

https://7chan.org/jew/

Some seriously good info over there for living cheap/free. I know. I'm fucking homeless. GG OP.
>>
>>529072778
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/master-yi

As someone that mains Caitlyn, I've said this too many times before

>>529072792
twitch tv/drunk_games
>>
say this, for free pls, broke dick nigger here as well
I'll hunt him down and feed him his own testicles and i do it in a jiffy and i don't care if his momma their, his grand mamma, innocent bystanders, little kids, baby-sitters, bill collectors, whatever! id leave his whole block filled with hot brass if i have to. and you know why? cause i just don't give a fuck.
>>
>>529072062
>https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/1973-1
AHAHAH WTF
>>
>>529073239
I've thought about streaming on twitch, playing games and getting drunk. If I had money to send you I would. If you can hold out til next month I can throw some $ your way.
>>
>>529073239
>https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/master-yi

FUCK YES! Thank you! - Ill keep e-mail and try to send a dollar or two when i get a chance. Thanks for epic voice
>>
>>529073251
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/dont-give-a-fuck
>>
>>529073813
say this please:
after all these years you call me a stalker?
it didn't have to end like this... this is what I get for helping random people.
>>
This is "The Man with the Golden Voice", shown on the news a year or so ago, had an amazing voice but homeless because of his drug addiction; he got some notoriety after being on TV, given a job and whatnot, but was apparently unable to completely kick the habit and wound up homeless again. Nice voice though.
>>
C-could you real the Navy Seals pasta? I'll send like $5 if you do.
>>
>>529073636
Thank you, I do appreciate it.

>>529073026
Become a sex hotline worker
>>
Hey op, fire me an email over to [email protected] so I've got your contact I may have a paid task for your voice......
>>
>>529074179
Im a shyfag lol...
>>
OP can i pay you in dogecoin?
>>
>>529074586
As long as it's a few hundred thousand
>>
>>529073813
AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA FUCK YES thanks man!
>>
Do audiobooks.
>>
>>529072986

OP has an awesome voice. But that's not him. This is Ted Williams:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6rPFvLUWkzs
>>
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Is that you in the picture? I saw you on TV. You spoke well and someone gave you a job working in radio or something. How did that work out for you?
>>
>>529074125
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/stalker
>>
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>>529069782
Berries and cream! Berries and cream! I'm a little lad who love berries and cream! (higher pitch) Berries and cream berries and cream im a little lad who loves berries (clap) and creeeaaam.

Do it for the dog
>>
>>529074641
So you won't take anything under 100 bucks? jesus christ i thought you were poor.
>>
shit, I could totally use your voice, but I need to write up the script first. As long as you keep your soundcloud, I'll contact you sometime soon
>>
>>529074586
>>529074641
nah fuck it. send it anyways. DJHF7QkfrM5Y5c9 3G2uf5Yf1arVKSM7w3R
>>
>>529075068
Sorry, I thought they were still worth .000000000000001 cents
>>
>>529075007
omg op is a bro give this man some money
>>
Say "Big boss, is that you? What happened to our memes and genes. And that faggot with all the gadgets?". please?
>>
>>529074178
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/navy-seals

I actually recorded that a few months ago
>>
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Have you tried getting a job for adverts,video games,tv documentaries,etc?.. At least, ok here's your next mission; Send some reports out to some companies and see if they like it, etc..
>>
>>529075112
I need confirmation this is OP

say this in soundcloud

"Feel the rhythm! Feel the rhyme! Get on up, its bobsled time! COOL RUNNINGS! "

if you say this I will give 30 doge
>>
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>>529075546

I love you man. Good luck getting the money you need.

>incoming 5 dongs
>>
>>529075034
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/berries-and-cream
>>
>>529075546
you are awesome. i would send you money if i had some. hoping some anon will send you money
>>
>>529075806
What the fuck is he supposed to do with measly 30 doge?
>>
>>529076068
op send a sample to kojima he's a bro, he'll probably give you a spot on a metal gear game
>>
>>529075806
The guy that posted his address above is not me

https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/cool-runnings

My dogecoin address
DAFZK5NKd2E5XGxAL
QwWp2BsVd955ucnAh
>>
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>>529075941
>https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/berries-and-cream

YOU ARE A GOD AMONGST MEN SIR. MAY FORTUNE FIND YOU IN YOUR TRAVELS
>>
>>529076068
If doge takes off like bitcoin, you could be a millionaire.
>>
why don't you join the navy and do something with your life instead of being a faggot
>>
>>529075538
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/big-boss
>>
>>529075908
Verified that you sent.

Thank you so much
>>
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>>529076840

Not a problem. Once again, I wish you the best of luck.

>better top the luck with tits.
>>
>>529076635
If I weren't such a giant fucking pussy, and afraid of dying, I'd consider it
>>
>>529076267
sent ;)

I encourage other people to send doge as well
>>
>>529077285
I haven't opened my dogecoin client in ages, so I have over 30,000 blocks to update before I can check anything
>>
>>529077149
If it weren't for her eyes, I'd probably be masturbating to her right now
>>
>>529077771
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/her-eyes
>>
>>529069782
can u do the navy seal copypasta
>>
>>529078046
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/navy-seals

Posted it up above already
>>
>>529078046
oops, somehow scrolled passed it. mb
>>
Your microphone sucks OP... or else you are applying too many effects.

Anyway... this company is doing another voice contest soon. check it in a month

http://www.thenextgreatvoicetalent.com/
>>
Wish I had something to send but can you say,
"Hey Zach, you flaming cock mongler, I bet you actually get hard when Dom tickles your bum."
But seriously dude, you'd make a great voice actor. Try sending some samples to someone.
>>
Sell your microphone if you need money for rent.
>>
>>529078598
I use an AKG condensor microphone and put a little compression and EQ on it. Here's the stalker clip from above without effects.
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/no-effects

Does that sound better, or is it really just the mic?

I also had no idea about that contest. Thanks so much for that.
>>
can you do this (or at least a part of it) plz, but in a very serious talking voice and getting angry towards the end, like reporting a tragedy or something like that.


I’m a little teapot, short and stout
Here is my handle, here is my spout
When I get all steamed up, hear me shout
Tip me over and pour me out
>>
>>529078778
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/hey-zach
>>
can you please sing the pokemon theme song?

You're voice is fucking awesome, Ill throw some bucks you're way for all this shit
>>
Did you do that metal gear rising song?
I think it was you
>>
>>529079162
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/teapot
>>
Someone get this guy a job!
>>
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in a world, where 4chan has access to the greatest voice actor of all time.... north korea has collective balls the size of peanuts
>>
>>529079409
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/pokemon

I don't remember the rest after that
>>
"Hey there, just wanted you to know, * deep breath and whisper passionately* poop gets me." Dude your throat sounds like sex.
>>
>>529069782
"That's how I was left there, alone. With all the tortured voices in my own head. Cutting my hands collecting the scattered shards of my broken soul. Drifting alone in this dark void of madness with no company but the echoing of my own screams throuought the vast silence of the emptiness inside me for all eternity"
>>
>>529080510
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/north-korea

You really think I'm the greatest? :3
>>
>>529081045
>https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/north-korea

how r u not doing movie trailers? or at least gag trailers????
>>
>>529081045
ofc
>>
Dude, your amazing... get into DJing!!!
>>
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"May your anus be stretched by endless sodomy so long as the universe remains in motion. Your nipples will be chafed by the corrugated cocks of shit demons, crafted in the womb of the vulpine temptress herself. The only cure to your spiritual infection of the anus is pure, unadulterated...Dom."
>>
Dear god please say "Kept cha waiting, huh?" like Solid Snake
>>
>>529076428
doge is a fucking faggot and that shit will never be worth anything.
>>
say: "Hey Nina (Nee-nah), I just wanted to say that Matze(Mah-tseh) loves you and you are fucking awesome"

thanks man :)
>>
>>529081308
Because, honestly, I don't know how to get involved in that
>>
>>529081045
Could you please say:
"i love chicken nuggets *dramatic pause* chicken nuggets is like my family, chicken nuggets is my life"
You sound like the guy from Postal
>>
>>529081045
Say
"I'm a poor nigger faggot, and I'm about to get kicked out of my nigger apartment. Please, I'll even suck cock just give me money."

I'll pay you 5 fucking bucks, just for making me laugh.
>>
>>529080769
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/hey-there
>>
Op is not a faggot
>>
OP DELIVERS
>>
>>529080785
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/left-there

Some commas would've been nice in that sentence
>>
>>529075546
THIS IS THE BEST THING EVER!!!!

I am fucking downloading this
>>
>>529082669
This summer, my dong gets chopped off by a feminist in "Women Take Over The World" coming to a tumblr near you.
>>
>>529081670
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/endless-sodomy
>>
>>529082096
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/poor
>>
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>>
>>529081682
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/waitin
>>
>>529083004
You're fantastic. Good luck in all of your future endeavors. Record some samples and get an agent
>>
Archived this shit because this is hilarious
4archive.org/b/res/529069782
>>
>>529081858
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/hey-nina
>>
>>529083258
Wow, thanks man

I actually don't give a fuck about you though you miserable cocksucker, u upset bro?
>>
>>529081858

??? :(
>>
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Op please. lol
>>
>>529083870
Oh shit, I'll pay for that as well
>>
>>529083709
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/not-mad
>>
do the "hey faggots, my name is john" copypasta.

do it with a jersey accent if you can
>>
>>529078778
>>529080769
>>529081670

Hey, Chris.
>>
>>529075546
>KEK
>>
>>529081956
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/chicken-nuggets
>>
>>529083696

thanks man, my gf was kinda pleased :D
>>
>>529082883
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/this-summer
>>
>>529083870
OP here

Working on this one at the moment. It might take a little bit longer than usual
>>
>>529083494
yeeees
>>
can i talk to you v?a email? im interested in your voice
>>
Betsy and Peen, Go fuck yourselves...Biff is going to return one day and fucking rape you; he's also going destroy you. Eat shit you dirty rats, also fuck Tweet
>>
>>529085115
Of course. Send an email to [email protected] and we'll go from there
>>
>>529083870
>>529084043
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/chicken-nugger

Enjoy
>>
>>529085898
op why are you so cool
>>
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War. War never changes.
>>
>>529085541

Please do this one; will donate.
>>
>>529086298
This
>>
>>529085541
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/betsy-and-peen
>>
>>529086298
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/war-never-changes
>>
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Here I was, just minding my own business enjoying my Second Amendment rights, and you people have to freak out on me!
>>
You sound eerily similar to Diplo.

Say "We are farmers, bum bdum bum bum bum bum bum"
>>
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Hey Faggots,

My name is John, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day looking at stupid ass pictures. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten any pussy? I mean, I guess it's fun making fun of people because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than jerking off to pictures on facebook.

Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I'm pretty much perfect. I was captain of the football team, and starter on my basketball team. What sports do you play, other than "jack off to naked drawn Japanese people"? I also get straight A's, and have a banging hot girlfriend (She just blew me; Shit was SO cash). You are all faggots who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.

Pic Related: It's me and my bitch
>>
>>529086452
>https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/betsy-and-peen


Ahh man legend. money on way.
>>
>>529086874
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/second-amendment
>>
>>529087016
you make me feel bad about myself
>>
>>529087016
Dominik you little faggot you suck and your girlfriend Megan is really fat.

Please do it ! Will give you some dollars
>>
Goddamnit OP why are you not doing voice over or radio work????

OP you are not a faggot btw
>>
>>529086880
https://soundcloud.com/user317868733/farmers

I have no idea who Diplo is, and I'm too lazy to google it
>>
Pwndora is the hugest fucking faggot to walk this earth. May a thousand floppy donkey dicks slosh around in and around your face!

-GO!
Thread replies: 139
Thread images: 15

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