Brian Cage is the greatest big man in wrestling today.
A 6 foot literal bodybuilder that can do flippyshit as good as early Brock, with the charisma and technical skill of an Indie darling...
How has Vince not signed this guy yet? He'd be a perfect Paul Heyman guy, maybe even have him feud with Lesnar and beat Brock in a retirement match?
>outlaw wrestling
>>1425624
have sex
>IM NOT A MAN
what did he mean by this?
>>1425624
Looks like his heart is gunna explode from HGH abuse any minute
>>1425624
looks like he has enlarged organs, gross
>>1425631
>>1425633
you're right guys. now THIS is what a real wrestler looks like. real intimidating.
>>1425624
The fuck is going with his upper body? He looks like a goddamn anime game.
>>1425737
trenbolone.
What's wrong with his gut? Is he about to explode from roids?
>>1425624
He looks like a childhood friend's shitty created wrestler in a video game
>HIS NAME IS BRIAN "THE TERMINATOR" CAGE!!I TOOK THE DEFAULT GUY, MADE HIM ALL MUSCLEY AND MAXED OUT HIS STATS AND HES SO AWESOME I GAVE HIM A TOP ROPE POWERBOMB AS HIS FINISHER!
>>1425630
HE'S A MACHINE
>>1425624
THIS IS WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT DAMMIT!
>>1425752
Those are muscles, fatty. Drop down to single digit % body fat and you might be able to see yours.
>having more than 2% body fat
>>1425767
>Those
>Muscles
Those are intestines that will explode at any moment actually.
>>1425768
pls lose weight and have sex.
>>1425770
Pls get an education
>>1425624
I'm sure he'll pass the wellness test
>>1425773
Well if Paul keeps on passing them, sure...
It's freakishly scary how quick and agile Cage is for a Chad McMuscles meathead.
>>1425778
HGH can make you fat but not Heyman fat
>>1425790
>Heyman
>fat
lol, he's all muscle. You think it's possible to deal with the ECW guys without huge mass?
>>1425624
He's only 5'9
>>1425819
>LITERAL MANLET
BRAVO VINCE
>>1425761
That's the whole point retard, he looks like a guy that can't even be real. But yeah, go on with your skinnyfat sub 6 ft "stars" lol. I'm sure they're gonna keep wwe going strong
What's with the CM Punk chops?
Nigga looks ugly
>>1425819
Cage is billed at 6 feet tall. what the fuck are you talking about?
>>1425624
>>1425863
>Billed height
>Same as actual height
Cmon now marky mark
>>1425867
wasn't implying that, but if he could pass for 6' he's likely closer to that than he is to 5'9.
>>1425873
So you're saying he's like, 5'10 and a half instead of 5'9? Big fucking difference?
>>1425772
...on...?
He was in WWE Developmental years ago.
They fired him for pissing hot in a drug test.
They actually acted surprised he was on the gas and fired him for it.
Now this is an /asp/ I can get behind
>>1426223
>cage gets fired
>reigns gets suspended and left in the title picture
i thought if they got trt prescribed from a doctor they're allowed to be on? really bad decision to let him go.
>>1425817
He only needs a huge nose for that
He admits that his piss is radioactive by this point.
>>1426223
He wasn't even roided up then.
He got cut because it was Spring Cleaning.
You're talking out of your ass, boy.
>>1426667
Cage admitted this in an interview with F4Wonline 3 years ago. Its on the site, go look it up.
You are talking out of your ass, boy.
>>1426671
post the link
To be honest if Roman had the body of Cage and did moves as impressive as his, people would love him
But then again, HE'S NOT A MAN
>>1426687
>if Ramen wasn't shit people would like him
You don't say?
Cause his urine would melt the cup.
>>1426678
http://www.f4wonline.com/may-28-figure-four-daily-bryan-alvarez-talks-brian-cage-about-tna-gut-check-his-wwe-career-how-it
>>1426671
He said they were waiting to fire him for any reason. Something about how WWE doesn't want guys they can't hang their own hat on, so even though Cage was over, it didn't matter because he isn't product of WWE creative.
>>1426744
>Alvarez radio
Yeah I'm not listening to this David Cross sounding fuckhead to find out what I already know:
http://slam.canoe.com/Slam/Wrestling/2013/05/21/20838831.html
He probably doesn't want to be bothered with that wellness shit and on LU he makes plenty while being able to cycle whenever he wants
>>1426784
Cage was fired for pissing hot. It's literally right there in the F4W interview, he says it himself.
I don't know why you need to cling to this myth, but whatever helps you sleep at night.
>>1425624
overpumped manlet.
Literally the same body as Test before he died.
Cage on LU is pretty entertaining, but in the indies he is someone who is actually too big for his own good.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hQVRqJOsdQ0
