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RAW GAMETHREAD #5
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You are currently reading a thread in /asp/ - Alternative Sports & Wrestling

Thread replies: 255
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>cheese gobbling cheese americans
>>
>de gay
>>
>flair/flair drama

Great i'm gonna go grab a snack
>>
Second
>>
Muted the TV until this SHIT is over.
>>
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>Women's wrestling
>>
Seriously skipping this Flair shit
>>
how many commercials have we had now ?
>>
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>tfw Big E was a member of Bullet Club all along
>>
I missed the first hour. Did Jericho do anything yet?
>>
Rusev needs a face turn, even if it's on the basis of "your food is so good that now I love your country"
>>
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>>1341236
No

you practically missed nothing
>>
Rusev sucks
>>
>hockey is out of intermission
THANK GOD
>>
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>>1341193

Did I miss anything important?

>Hope I didn't miss the return of KURT ANGLE and his three I's.
>>
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>>1341206

he will build up the tag team titles
>>
>>1341241
Owens got that gimmick already
>>
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Eagerly looking forward to the state of Dana's booty tonight
>>
still in puerto rico boys!
>>
>Primo and Epico

Oh look it's fucking nothing!
>>
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>more of the Shining Stars

STOP
>>
I have seen a lot of bad RAWs in my life

This is for sure one of the worst and makes the top 5 list
>>
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shining jobbers
>>
>>1341241
i loeff thee peatza
>>
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>be american
>gobble cheese
>turn in to cheese
Top kek americucks
>>
>>1341247
literally nothing
>>
The hatch thing is a "AND HIS NAME IS JOHN CENA" joke a year too late, calling it
>>
>>1341256
The go-home 2 weeks ago was on par with this. But this is total shit.
>>
KILL THE SHINING STARS PLEASE
>>
They invited me to Puerto Rico again. THOSE MOTHERFUCKERS
>>
>tfw switched to sky sports stream
>no more fast food ads
thank you based sky
>>
weren't one of these dudes a fake Sin Cara?
>>
Are Memorial Day Raws usually this bad because no one is going to watch it ?
>>
>ATTENTION

WE ARE NOW HAVING A WOMENS """"WRESTLING"""" SEGMENT

PLEASE HAVE FOOD AND WASHROOM BREAKS NOW.

SEGMENT SHOULD BE OVER IN ABOUT 5 MINS
>>
>>1341268
It was Goldberg
>>
>women's champion Ric Flair
holy fuck.

maffew must be creaming himself watching this shit
>>
>Puerto Rico

Pay debt, spics.
>>
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Worst RAW of the fucking year so far.
>>
>>1341263

>Awake at 3 am to watch a kid's show

How messed up is your life my man?
>>
>>1341254
>>1341255
this has to end with Carlito coming back

otherwise what the fuck were they thinking

do they actually own a puerto rican travel business outside of WWE?
>>
i haet muh dad
>>
>>1341236
No he ME RAW.
>>
>>1341250
kek
>>
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>A confrontation between Women's Champion Ric Flair

Cole pls
>>
>Women's wrestling time
>>
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>>
>they took these guys off TV for 6 months and this was the best gimmick 27 writers could come up with
Holy fuck
>>
Can anyone actually believe these Puerto Rico promos they've been running for like half a year now? They're not even really promos, what the actually fuck is the point??
>>
>>1341283
who the FUCK is mafffew
>>
>>1341268
It was for Goldberg being a pre-order bonus for WWE 2k17.
>>
>random dean
>>
>they're having other wrestlers react to it
you've got to be kidding
>>
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>Come to Puerto Rico, the shining star of carribbean.
>>
>>1341273
Yeah, dude. Always best stream. I was on /wooo/ and it fucking sucked. Fun to be an Amerifag and get great britfag streams.
>>
Dean sees through the façade. Interesting.
>>
Dean is supposed to be crazy but then gives his 2 cents on every matter in wwe all calm
>>
NOTHING HAS HAPPENED IN ONE HOUR AND THIRTY MINUTES
>>
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>>1341275
Fake sin cara is the current sin cara
>>
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>>1341302
wymons/trans are important now goy
>>
>when ur daughter is bigger than u
>>
>>1341300
>>1341282
At least he isn't the showcase guy, thank god
>>
WHAT THE FUCK IS THE PURPOSE OF THIS SEGMENT WHY IS DEAN AMBROSE COMMENTING AS IF HE GIVES A SHIT

NOTHING MAKES SENSE ANYMORE
>>
>Kallisto out of fucking nowhere
>>
Is this a super low-budget 30 for 30?
>>
Real talk, I liked that Charlotte promo when she kicked out her dad. You could tell there was a lot of truth behind her words.
>>
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>Charlotte with only Dana Brooke now
>>
I'm not one to tap out of women's wrestling segments meme but for the sake of my mental health this is the first time I am doing it due to the nature of how awful that segment last week was
>>
>>1341297
Puerto Rico is really desperate for tourism, they're pretty fucked
>>
>these cringeworthy superstar opinions on Charlotte's pipe bomb
>>
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SAVE_US.DANA
>>
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>Its a VH1 Behind the Music episode
>>
>>1341303
Such a paradise. American administration at it's best!
>>
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>no one gave a flying shit about that charlotte promo they needed other wrestlers to talk about it
>>
>>1341285
That probably goes to the raw two weeks before Mania
>>
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>The Man
>The Guy
>The Champ
>The Woman
>The Architect
>The Club

WTF
>>
>this "commentary" from these wwe "superstars"

stop this
>>
>>1341309
Goldberg commercial
>>
>>1341313
Source on pic?
>>
Becky vs Natalya in a Bra & Panties match when?
>>
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Why is this awful promo being pushed as some amazing shit that will be remembered forever?
>>1341286
It's 9:30PM bright guy
>>
>JBL with the meta commentary
>>
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Ric sees through the facade, interesting
>>
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>womens """"wrestling"""
>>
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Can we have more "façade" posts?
>>
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>womens wrestling deserves better
>>
>>1341336
snapchat
>>
>>1341333
WTE*
>>
How fake are those tits?
>>
Charlotte's cleavage is on point

Good god
>>
>TO ME YOUR JUST DEAD
>I WISH YOU DIED IN THE W0O0O0OMB

THIS COMPANY IS SO HORRIBLE. WHY DO PEOPLE GIVE THEM MONEY?
>>
>>1341346
>charlies tits

wtf is habbennig to muh dik
>>
FACE STEPHANIE

MEN!!!!

DICKS AT THE READY
READY
AIM
FIRE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>
>>1341333

welcome to the The era
>>
Jeez, Steph.
>>
man arms: the segment
>>
BASED STEPH
A
S
E
D
>>
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>Women's wrestling
>>
holy fuck Charlotte BTFO
>>
But Steph disrespected Ric? Why is creative giving her the moral high ground?
>>
I wouldn't mind going out to dinner with charlotte
>>
Steph has to emasculate the women now? It wasn't enough to do it to the entire male roster?
>>
>this match is brought to you by warcraft
Is it because Natayla looks like an ogre?
>>
>>1341351
They're fake you virgin
>>
Charlotte vs Steph in a Bra & Panties match when?!
>>
Angry Steph turns me on
>>
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>warcraft
>>
>steph hatefucking charlotte with a strapon fantasy
thanks wwe
>>
>>1341193

MY DADDY ISSUES.... so much for WOMAN WRESTLING....
>>
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>DANA BROOKE

watch out for her

apparently they really like Dana Brooke on the creative team
>>
that was pretty based from steph tbqhfam
>>
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God damnit Vince, make RAW Great Again!

He has several hundred of matches still in the tank and ready to go at a moments notice.
>>
I'm giving up and turning on basketball

Tell me when Cena is on
>>
Charlotte "We're trying to appeal the MLP fanbase" Flair
>>
>it's a steph buries the talent episode
>>
Steph vs. Charlotte confirmed for Summerslam

>State of the women's championship
>>
Didn't steps husband beat flair into a bloody pulp once lmao
>>
Face Steph is top tier stuff desu, hope she starts acting like prime 2003 Steph again
>>
THE LITERAL STATE OF THE WOMENS DIVISION PRESENTED BY WARCRAFâ„¢
>>
This is the worst raw in at least a year.
>>
>>1341349
Steph's?
I know she used to have enhancements before her first pregnancy, but she had them removed then. I'm not sure if they grew naturally (usually happens after pregnancies) or if she put them back on.
>>
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>>1341367
The cleavage is real nigga
>>
So Steph is legit face now, right?
>>
>>1341353
There should be a list of all the overacted lines

>YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE MY FRIEND
>I'M GONNA KICK WHERE HIS APPENDIX USED TO BE
>I WISH YOU DIED IN THE WOOOOOOMB
>>
What the fuck is happening? First RAW I've watched since TLC because I kept hearing it's been better lately but this is fucking awful.
>>
>Warcraft
That's still relevant?
>>
>Ryder buried
>Nattie about to be buried

No male or female have been buried more by Vince, the past 5 years than both of them. Gotta bury them both on the same night.
>>
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LEAKED NUDE OF CHARLOTTE !!! !!! !!!
>>
Like Warcraft, this match will too involve orc women and be very very shitty.
>>
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>>1341365

she needs to show which woman runs the place
>>
zzz manlets with vaginas match
>>
>It's a "Steph is wrestling at summerslam again" episode
>>
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>>1341374
True...she's definitely the least talented callup by miles and miles, but Dana = thicc
>>
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>>1341373
>giving 1 fuck about womens wrestling.
it's a piss/fap break. nothing more
>>
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>>1341395
>>
>>1341374
>less talented version on Nattie

I wonder why?
>>
>>1341378

That is what new Smackdown will be for bro... wrestling instead of soap opera.... probably.... maybe.... hopefully...
>>
>>1341400
>it's a "you still got it" chant for someone who never had it episode
>>
>>1341395
Kek

KEK
>>
>>1341365
>now

Mate, she's been doing that for a while, though she did take a break for the dawn of the Diva's Revolution.
>>
>>1341394
Just wait till the Brand Split happens. Both of them will be in Smackdown and will experience a career renaissance,
>>
>>1341395
nice try, this fridge is too feminine looking to be charlotte
>>
JUST REALIZED THAT SAMI ZZZZZZZZZZZZZAYN HASNT APPEARED YET

FUCK
>>
>>1341404
I know, hard to believe anyone has less talent than nattie
>>
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>>1341394
>yfw Ric comes back to manage Natty and Ryder
>yfw WOOOO WOOOO WOOOOO
>yfw the Figure Fourshooter
>>
Reminder that Steph is winning the women's championship at summerslam
>>
literally no more than 2 matches at a total of 15 minutes in total and raw has been on for an hour and a half

how many commercials have we had now ?
>>
>>1341402
Top kek is that a poster on here.

I knew you faggots were all manlet dweebs. Im embarrassed to even be here kekekekek
>>
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>>1341384
>the woman with the most heat and the guy with the most heat are both faces
>>
>>1341390

I think every year Dave Meltzer ranks the worst promos and they're usually the ones where someone says something about wishing a family member was dead.
>>
This is the first RAW I've tuned into in well over a year. How good is tonight compared to other weaks? Cos tonight is pretty fuckin weak desu
>>
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>>1341402
>>
>>1341400

>its a dominatrix steph episode

can't wait, your virgin meme fucks can watch jay leno wrestle random gook #5000 the day before
>>
>>1341423
Nobody is giving me any (You)s. Should I try to give a (You) to myself?
>>
KURT ANGLE SIGHTING
>>
>>1341405
lel no

vince is going to be more involved than ever with smackdown, including ruining the commentary like he does with raw
>>
was that Jeff Harvey?
>>
>>1341418
YOU
>>
>>1341418
>not knowing based aids skrillex
>>
>Faces tell Charlotte that she should stop using Ric to win her matches and that he is holding her back
>Goes on live air and tells Ric to her face that he is holding her back and that she is not gonna be using him in her matches
>Faces say that Charlotte did a bad and evil thing

Fucking hell
>>
>>1341404

If Nattie was a heel, her charisma vacuum would make more sense. But no... MUH FAMILY HART
>>
CENA
E
N
A
>>
>>1341421
It might very well be worst of the year.
>>
>>1341426
Marked a little
>>
>>1341395

Have sex
>>
>>1341429
You what?
>>
Jesus Christ the segment could have been done better.

Steph could've been like "Our fathers are responsible for putting wrestling on the map. yadda yadda yadda and I would never dream of embarassing mine the way you did yours etc." in stead of just going in her face and be like "SHUT YOUR DAMN MOUTH" Higher ups look crazy dumb when they shout.
>>
SAWFT
>>
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>>1341418
nah it's sjw fucking white male meme from /pol/
>>
>>1341426

Where?
>>
>>1341412

kek
>>
S A W F T

SAWFT
>>
>>1341414
She is literally a Nattie clone, just far less talented.
Short
Blonde
Thick


But Vince is big on Dana, and has buried Nattie to the earth's core. Nattie should be the top diva, and not a glorified jobber. If her last name wasn't Hart she would be far more successful.
>>
>>1341417

Am I going senile? There usually aren't these many commercials. I can't believe I'm still watching when all I want is Cena...of all people.
>>
>>1341421
This is the worst it's been since post-wrestlemania, they've actually been decent up until now
>>
C O U P L E

H A Y T A S

?
>>
This is a terrible raw, but i'm glad i'm with you guys watching this burning car wreck as it happens.
>>
OH ITS THE MANLET INJURED AND BIG CASS
>>
>>1341437
>He likes horses
>>
AND THIS IS OUR PROMO

AND IT'S SEVEN HOURS LONG

AND YOU CAN'T

TEACH

THAT
>>
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Who /chaingang/ here?
>>
>Rick Flair
One of the Four Horseman

>Charlotte
A horse
>>
>>1341427

Sadly probably true
>>
>>1341431
>its another "all the faces are huge hypocrites" episode
Byron Saxton is the worst about it. He loses his mind every time a face is attacked outside of a sanctioned match, but if a face jumps someone, you can hear him jerking it at the table.
>>
The same promo with these dudes.

The Enzo is good on the mic is a meme.
>>
Jesus Christ get some new material
>>
>enzo still wearing the jacket he stole from nakamura
>>
WE

GOT

A
COUPLA HAYTAS?

COUPLA HAYTAS?
>>
>>1341444
they had a little video for collections on the WWE network

Clips were shown of John Cena's rise and Kurt Angle was in one of those
>>
>>1341449
gotta get that ad money before everyone switches to basketball
>>
HOW U DOIN
>>
>>1341450
the RAW that ended with Dean ripping Jerichos jacket is still the worst
>>
Kek I like this manlets catchphrase

New age outlaw return feud when
>>
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>the same promo every week
>>
>>1341418
>Im embarrassed to even be here

Aren't you here all day every single day talking to yourself on multiple trips? Are you literally brain damaged?
>>
>>1341453
C-Colin Cassidy vince
>>
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>yfw Goldberg spears Cena in the end of the show
>>
wait..wat
>>
how the fuck is he back so soon after a concussion? what the hell is wrong with vince
>>
>Enzo Annoying
>>
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>>1341458
>>
>it's an Enzo's monologue doesn't work episode
>>
>that random foot shot
>>
CHEESE
>>
>ANOTHER TAG MATCH
please just kill me
>>
I hooked up with natalya once if anyone is interested in the story
>>
Who's this fuckin' wigger..?
>>
>>1341471
That one was actually good
>>
>What's my promo tonight boss?
>Name off types of cheese
>>
>>1341478
Somebody please post that Beno*t gif
>>
Big Cass been making Dudley's job 2v1 for a month, imagine if Enzo could wrestle. They are perfect for each other.
>>
DICK CHEESE LOL
>>
>>1341478

his gimmick is brain damaged retard

the concussion helps
>>
is enzo the janetty
>>
>Enzo and Big Cass
BOOOOOOOOOOOORIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAS
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK
>>
>all this cheese
>>
HOW YA DOIN
>>
Your mom is like a bus route

Everybody ride her

How ya doin?

Eh How ya doin??

Couple a haytas!

Couple a haytas!
>>
Why the fuck are they STILL feuding with the dudleys?
>>
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>Enzo and Cass
>>
Dick cheese?
>>
HOW YOU DOIN
>>
ayy i love these dorks
>>
My god 6 months ago I hated Enzo and Cass more than anything...Now EASILY the best part of Raw.
>>
C R I N G E
R
I
N
G
E
>>
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>from under
>>
This is the Cheese episode
>>
Is Enzo & Cass the Too Cool of the "New Era"?
>>
>AIDS CHEDDA

What did he mean by this?
>>
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Is Cass' gimmick since Extreme Rules pre-show now just to list foods?
>>
Cass still delivers lines like he's in Garth Marenghi's Darkplace.
>>
This is terrible.
This RAW is pain.
>>
goldberg vs brock when?
>>
>>1341457

they're okay
>>
>no mozzarella
YOU HAD ONE JOB
>>
>>1341496
1111111111111111188888888888888++++++++
>>
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mfw an american fattie was eating cheese near me
>>
>>1341509

Dean isnt out there
>>
>>1341456
<sensible chuckle>
>>
I AM THE CHEESE

I AM THE BEST CHARACTER ON THE SHOW
>>
These guys are over as fuck

Literal rock tier catchphrase recognition
>>
>>1341500
Le new era meme.

>Dubley boys
>>
>>1341509

Have sex
>>
>yfw that stale routine is THIS over
>>
>>1341478
Concussions are odd like that. Some guys can bounce back in days. Some can take months. There is no fix time to recover from one.
>>
So I guess Enzo recovered well from that terrible concussion lmao
>>
Haven't the Dudleys aready wrestled tonight?
>>
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inb4 Enzo gets another concussion
>>
>>1341494

Like Luke Gallows?
>>
Jesus...
>>
>>1341518
>mfw he threatens the Dudleys with a knucklesupper
>>
>>1341526
Exactly Enzo and Cass are and its C R I N G E
>>
Enzo is the new Road Dogg and that's it
>>
Has the Dudley Boyz won a match yet
>>
Holy shit stop shilling for Warcraft

that's like the 10th time they've mentioned it while on-air, and then all the commercials for it in between
>>
>>1341529

nigga please, fucking 18+ PLEASE
>>
>>1341496
cupple-uh-haytuz
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