I fucked up a few months ago meeting a therapist by making myself seem far too normal and lying because I'm so used to it, and realized I should go back because waking up feeling like shit every day, thinking you should just kill yourself and almost breaking down randomly at work isn't something that happens to regular people.
How am I supposed to go back to the same person and explain this to try and get medication or something?
"Hey, I wasn't exactly honest with you the first time we met, I was nervous because I am scared people will think I am crazy."
There you go, quite literally the only answer you need.
Do it. There's no secret to it, just let the words fall out. It's like vomiting. There's horror and a clenching strain a huge mess in the floor and you're hot and embarrassed.
And then (if you're going to a good therapist) he'll smile and get to work. Remember that dealing with issues like yours is his day job; he can handle whatever you throw at him. Anything.
>>17358357
Pretty much this
>>17358345
I think they'd be very understanding if you told them. Part of what makes this shit so awful in a lot of cases is that it's hard to go and get help. It's pretty logical that even if you made steps to getting better that those psychological barriers to talking about how you're feeling could still be there.
Hope things get more manageable for you anon. Suicidal thoughts are a horrible thing to have to try and live with.