I love my girlfriend, a lot, we've been together for nearly a year and a half now. We've argued a few times, almost broken up a few times (we both are quite stubborn) but I've noticed recently I just don't feel the same feelings I used to when I'm with her. I love her so much, the thought of losing her cripples me, but I just don't feel the same.
Can somebody make sense of this? I might be rambling, I don't like some of her behaviours, but I really do think a lot of her. Something just feels... Different, but I know that id be lost without her.
>>17311023
Honeymoon period is over. You don't feel all fuzzy and nice around her anymore. It's normal.
>>17311034
I agree. Though I think they honeymoon period made me forgive a lot of her behaviours. The bluntness, mood swings, jealousy, the incessant condescending, the unwillingness to ever admit fault, the refusal to ever accept I might be right about something. I put up with it all because i love her. It's weird really, i never thought I'd put up with so much shit. I give it as good back, I don't really back down from the stuff she does, but still, surely relationships aren't about that kind of thing?
You are both getting complacent and losing love.
Learn to like each other again.
Also, talk to her.
>>17311023
honeymoon is over. you get over the amazing excitement of getting to know someone, and now you know them. in older times people had less of a chance to notice this cuz they quickly got married and made babies and had to focus on that. they didn't have time to realize what their emotions were.
we deal with that a lot fast, courtship moves slower. you are over the excitement, which means you are less forgiving of the flaws and more annoyed.
that isnt to say you dont love her. maybe you do. maybe you dont. thats something you'll have to explore.
>>17311044
listen, take it from me, I was in a 4 and a half year relationship that I know I should have ended after like a year and a half.
Get to know her again, this time your head will be clear of all that honeymoon period shit you had when you were first dating her. Check out her likes, dislikes, and what you like and dislike about her. Finally, ask yourself, "If I wasn't dating this girl, would I hang out with her?"
If the answer is no, break up. You can talk to her about it, but chances are she's probably not gonna change. You have a chance to see who she really is now.
And if you guys really do this >>17311044
then yeah, maybe break up and work on yourselves for a bit.
>>17311023
If she's that condescending and difficult, talk to her about it. Try to work between the two of you on the things that bother you. Martyrdom breeds resentment, and if she can't have a civil discussion about her faults and you can't see yours, then the relationship is doomed. Some comments about marriage I saw in a different thread apply here: >>17311645