How do you make some who hates you stop hating you?
Like how?
>>17280192
Sigh.
Dig deeper, anon, tell us whats wrong, etc. Etc.
>>17280192
Why bother? if they dislike you for no reason, you can't do anything. They are the shit. However, they have a reason that isn't stupid, stop doing whatever makes them hate you.
Depends on why they hate you. Did you set them on fire? I suggest putting them out, but not by peeing in them. Is a bucket of water near by?
>>17280343
i'd tell you but im scared they're watching
>>17280368
I doubt it. We need a story. It's not like there's some cure-all, here.
come on OP, tell aunty /adv/ what's wrong.
the answer will probably be the same regardless: you can't make someone feel something or stop feeling something. their feelings are their feelings. one thing you can do, though, is steer clear of them til they stop being mad. if you're lucky, it'll be one of those situations where the person eventually forgives you if you just stay the fuck out of their face for a month or a year or so (length of time depends on the situation and the person, some people are real grudge holders). if you're not lucky, well then that bridge is burned, move on.
if you can't get away from them (like a roommate or a coworker), confront them and offer to hear them out. when they start airing their beef, don't get all defensive and whiny, just hear them out. then thank them for their honesty and tell them you want some time to think about what they've said. then start thinking of ways you can compromise.
however.
if it is someone you can't get away from and they're just a flaming abusive asshole, start making plans to get away from them. move, transfer departments, find another job, whatever it takes. don't put up with toxic abusive people.
but if it's just that you're not getting along, try to figure out a compromise with them.
>>17280192
You can't really. I hate to sound like a loser counselor, but you're always gonna have haters. Let them talk all they want about you, they're still talking about you. You are the conversation, you are what they're spending a lot of time about. If you don't have anyone hating you, you're not doing life right. You can TRY to be friends with a hater, but odds are it won't work unless you have some fact to drop on the table.
![Bustup_13_19[1].png](https://i.imgur.com/bpilGW9.png "Bustup_13_19[1].png")
Monitoring this thread because I want to know as well.
The girl I like won't speak to me anymore, and has blocked me on facebook.
Is asking someone out really so bad that they would want to avoid you at all costs? We used to be okay friends, now she doesnt even want to look in my direction.
I get that she doesn't want to make it awkward, and I know just going back to being friends won't make me like her any less than I do now. But holy shit, avoiding me like the plague hurts me more than anything, and it only serves to depress me every time i see something that reminds me of her. What the hell did I do?
I'm sitting there, talking to her about her assignment for class, and final fantasy 15 (she's crazy about it,I guess) and she tunes out almost immediately. I just want things to go back to normal. I regret asking her out so much.
>>17280512
Rough man. Not your fault, you went for it, that's good for you.
Has it been too long? Like only a week or something? Things'll probably ease up if it hasn't been so long since you asked her. To go so far as to block you on facebook is very extreme.
At least you still see and talk to her and she isn't running away from you or anything. She'll probably ease up after some time.
>>17280512
You motherfucker.
If they block you and tune you out of their lives, they don't want to fucking talk to you anymore. You blew it. Now move the fuck on, because they have.
![Bustup_13_21[1].png](https://i.imgur.com/ZfWQV0J.png "Bustup_13_21[1].png")
>>17280541
Its been like 3 or 4 months since i asked her out. I last spoke to her like 3 weeks ago. Only time she does talk to me is if she happens to be part of a conversation me and another one of her friends are having, and thats only if one of us directly calls her out, when i speak, not even towards her, she immediately goes quiet. It's my fault this happened, and I don't even know what I did. Should i have kept my feelings locked away? Right now we could be geeking out about the FF15 movie they are making, but I just had to go and run my mouth. Okay, maybe not really but still.
>>17280547
I can't help it. I hate leaving loose ends. If I fuck something up, I fix it. If I said something wrong to her, I want to make it better somehow. It's driving me up the wall that I somehow offended her, and I can do nothing to fix it. If I did something wrong, tell me what it is, so i dont do it again to somebody else.
Everyone and even her tells me she doesn't hate me, and I didnt do anything wrong. You don't block someone unless you really don't like them, but she'll never admit it. One of the nicest people on campus, and she hates my guts and probably wishes I was dead. I just want her to stop thinking im some piece of shit. I care too much about my friends to lose them because of something I did.
>>17280192
Kill them
>>17280593
Well after thinking about it, >>17280547 is kind of right, just being a dick about it.
She'll certainly never want to date you, she's made that apparent. If you're hoping to reconcile some "friendship" afterwards, and it's been 3/4 months since and you're still getting this awkward feeling around her, she may just not be one of those girls comfortable with doing that. Possible she is inexperienced with guys asking her out? Most girls by 21 should have no issue saying no to a guy-friend and are so used to their horny friends asking them, they don't mind.
Basically, definitely drop the idea that you're ever going to date her, and understand that if, and I mean IF, you two get back to a point of seemingly-innocent "friendship", despite her knowing part of you wants to plow her, it won't be for a good while.
I'm sorry man, but maybe cutting ties is healthiest for the best of you. I don't think a guy/girl friendship can ever really work if one person wants to fuck the other.
Force them.
With your dick.
![Bustup_13_09[1].png](https://i.imgur.com/xxteTpY.png "Bustup_13_09[1].png")
>>17280608
Least she could do is atleast tell me she hates me to my face. I'd have a much easier time moving on then,because then i could atleast TRY to resent her. Or even just tell me what I did. I'm sitting here replaying the entire past 3 months over in my mind trying to figure what I said,and how i said it. Maybe she is right, I am a total piece of shit, and it's all because I couldn't just keep a lid on my feelings.
The worst part is that I see her everyday because our friend group hangs out in the same place every day. I may have to drop them just to get away from her. I don't even care if she wants to date me anymore, I can find somebody else, I just want her to stop hating me and looking at me like im some kinda subhuman trash. I did not spend the last 3 years trying to better myself in any way possible, just for her to take it all away and say Im worthless.
Fuck me, I may as well not ask anybody out If its just going to make them hate me right out of the blue.
Be honest with us, op. Are you talking about yourself?
>>17280664
LOOK AT YOU FISHING FOR PITY
If you're going to stop dating because ONE FUCKING PERSON turned you down, though very strongly turned you down, then just kill yourself. Because this ONE person that you are infatuated with turned you down, suddenly everyone is a big disappointment. Keep in mind, and I want you to really get this through your head, infatuation is not love. Or even liking someone.
>>17280664
>hates me
Well you don't know she hates you and my honest guess is she doesn't. Telling a girl you like them shouldn't make them hate you, and if it does, they're fucking bonkers.
>tell me what I did wrong
You didn't do anything "wrong", man, you had feelings eating away at you and you were honest with this girl. Be proud you actually did something about it. I've let feelings for a girl rot away inside me and never say anything until it was too late. That's much worse.
>replaying the entire past 3 months
Stop doing that. The past is the past, no point looking back when there's nothing new to find.
>and say Im worthless
Which, unless you forgot to mention, she hasn't said. Again, she probably doesn't hate you at all, I'm sure she just feels awkward about it.
>Fuck me, I may as well not ask anybody out If its just going to make them hate me right out of the blue.
Oh come on.
OP, there's this online community that I've been involved with for a year, but now they all hate me.
It takes a lot of energy to deal with that, counter it, and prove you're the bigger man. The more you try to fix it, the more problems that arise.
Then I realized, it's not real life, and I can go about my life without ever running into these people. So I said "bail? bail".
Protip: bail.
>>17280512
She either is creeped out by you, or doesn't have the social skills to proceed from you asking her out, and she doesn't want to lead you on.
This guy is an asshole: >>17280547
But I would just bail.
Fem anon here. Op I think she feels weird and cautious. In my past when a dude says he likes me and i dont reciprocate his feelings I've found it best to not say anything to them for a while. The guys I tried to keep talking to (as friends) always assumed i liked them and wanted to date. She could be like that, maybe you just gotta break the ice.
![Bustup_13_18[1].png](https://i.imgur.com/T5PYHve.png "Bustup_13_18[1].png")
>>17280678
Yea,yea infatuation, Why else do you think I explicitly avoided using the word 'love.' I actually despise using that when it comes to romance.
No, see. No doubt she is one of the nicest people on campus.
If she is sitting there thinking i should kill myself, which is totally out of character, Then maybe i should really assess the situation and myself, and start thinking about making a change somewhere. I most likely won't stop dating because of her, I mean I'm already interested in someone else I know. But thats a different story.
What I want to know is WHY the girl hates me. It bugs the shit out of me, that her, of all people in our friend group, the girl who claims she doesn't have a mean bone in her body, hates me. You don't block somebody you just "kinda" dislike. Assuming she isnt petty, I clearly had to have done something that she'd go so far to actively pretend I'm not in the room.
So if i'm a piece of shit, like im almost positive she thinks i am, Then what was the past few years for? I'm still the same shitty person from high school. And I refuse to let that be true, or let any of my friends/family think that.
TL;DR: I desperately want to prove to her that i'm definitely NOT a piece of shit, and the fact that she is probably thinking that, not only hurts me, but is actually throwing me into so many existential episodes.
I want to fix this, any way i can. Just walking away from it is like saying, Well fuck, shes right that im not going to get any better. I'm not asking for a complete 180, i just want middle ground.
