Feel stuck in a catch-22
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After masturbating I become complacent and lose the motivation to pursue women for a few days and overall don't feel a lot of sexual urges driving me, but when I don't masturbate I feel like I'm going crazy, I feel the urge to just tear the clothes off the next attractive women that walks by and take her right there in the street (I would obviously never do this since I have self control and some modicum of humanity and decency). The problem here is that there is no middle ground. If I masturbate I'm lax and don't care about pursuing sex and feel lonely, and if I don't then I become a thirsty motherfucker. Either way I think it shows in my behaviour a bit and it's pushing women away. What the heck and I supposed to do in this situation?
Nofap
>>17276451
That's clearly not working at the moment. There has got to be some way to be motivated and radiate the confidence and sexual energy that comes with abstaining from fapping without becoming thirsty AF.
>>17276571
You aren't doing it for long enough.
Yes, for a short period after you start nofap, you're going to have heightened sexual urges, but these will diminish back to normal levels after a period.
Just chill, dawg.
All in your head
I tried the nofap thing a while back, there's really this deep shame around masturbating that is almost religious in nature. It's literally the same thing the churches teach you. It's bad, it's the devil, and you should feel ashamed for pleasuring yourself.
When you masturbate (especially if you're a young guy like me) it's not like you're just completely spent and worthless and it's a wrap on the day. Theres still a lot of energy in your body that is required to live and enjoy life. Once again; mindset.
Then you have many of the great athletes, artists, and businessmen who abstain from sexual activity and funnel that energy into their projects. Well, if you're doing that, that's cool. If you're not? Who cares? Jerk off dude. It's good for ya.
>>17276571
Cllearly masturbating is working even worse, at least without masturbating there's the possibility of controlling your urges. Let's face it, you can't radiate sexual energy if you don't have any.
Stick with the sexual urges and go out and practise being relaxed around people. You can read this and go "yeah that might kinda work but I'm not really inclined to try it and I'd rather just feel stuck the way I am", the fact is that your thought patterns and the way you come across can change dramatically if you take the right action. So yeah, it's hard and will take a while but you'll eventuallly become comfortable with the urges.