If a friend of mine liked me at one point, but my inactiveness kind of pushed her away, is it at all possible to win her over again
The more I think about this situation and the more I realize how great she is the more I want to either off myself or spend the summer becoming someone that actually deserves her instead of the beta fuck who ruined his own chances at happiness that I am now
>>17159514
People move on. She's probably moved on, too.
The only people who don't move on are the people with nothing going on themselves, and hours to spend wondering 'what if', 'why,' and other irrelevant shit since the opportunity is gone now. People like you.
>>17159534
That's... enlightening.
Thank you, Anon.
I feel you OP but >>17159534 is probably right.
You made the choices and now you just need to move on and remember the outcome.
>>17159534
Goddammit
I know you're right but this is so fucking difficult to accept I just don't understand how I was too stupid to take advantage of the best opportunity my life's ever had
but I know you're right and that just makes it hurt more
>>17159564
Stop regretting, there's tons of women out there, she wasn't perfect, it wouldn't be a perfect relationship, none of them are - the true relationships are the ones that weather through hardship and time.
Buck up, take good care of yourself, improve, and find someone else to love. There's lots of people who need love out there, OP.
>>17159564
>>17159534
daaaaaamn that was savage. true, but savage.
desu I would have probably said something similar.
OP here is the problem with the way you're thinking. you think that this person is utterly unique when they aren't. you've ingrained this idea so deeply that you feel you now can not be happy without them because they are so singular... and that's stupid. there's 7 billion people on the planet. seven. b.i.l.l.i.o.n. there's someone else out there for you, I guarantee it. there is no such thing as ruined chances at happiness, you just need to go find it.
story time: found an incredibly interesting woman, we hit it off, we dated a bit, we broke up a bit, we dated a bit, we broke up a bit, we stayed broken up and didn't talk a long time. we ran into each other again and kinda hit it off again, I remembered how much i liked her and wanted to try again, some assholes did everything they could to ruin it, trying again didn't happen, it didn't bother me.
that last part is important. why? because there is no single person on this planet that can't be replaced in your life. it's maybe an uncomfortable truth. it's maybe a truth that makes you sound like an asshole. but it's the truth. we live on a planet of over 7 billion, not like way way way back in the day when there were maybe a couple thousand people living around you and you maybe couldn't lose that one guy or girl from your social circle cause then you didn't get cabbage that winter. everyone is replaceable. once you realize that you're free of others. helps if you get screwed over a lot. but that girl that you think is your only chance at happiness? replaceable. fortunately or unfortunately, however you want to look at it.
I choose to think its fortunate because we also live in an age of self righteous, and yet criminally vindictive, cunts. and you can just cut them all right out and not deal with any of the bullshit. you can cut out anyone they infect with their bullshit.
>>17159586
you could cut an entire goddamn country out of your life, and it literally would not fucking matter as far as the quality of your life. you can find anything in that country, anywhere else.
the united states, everyone says its the best country in the world and no one has the things they have, blah blah blah. it's 318.9 million people... 4.4% of the world population. nothing. similar to the proportional weight loss of taking a massive dump for a person of average weight, to put it in perspective.
that one girl, is not the end all be all of your world dude. should just be looking for someone you want to share your life with.
>>17159564
Obviously because you're not as smart as you think and need a serious dose of humility before you start to see the world rationally.
I really appreciate all of your posts, its making it a bit easier to come to terms with my fuck up and hopefully with time I won't see it as a fuck up anymore
As a secondary question, there's not really any way I can remove this friend from my life, and I kind of don't think I'll ever want to. Do you think that's going to make it harder to remember she's not as special as I'm thinking now? Should I just be more active with other girls to try and instill that?
>>17159564
>best opportunity my life's ever had
you're still thinking wrong.
>>17159613
I fail to see how humility would help anon. If I'm honest he needs a little ego so he can regrow his balls. in fact I see nothing in any of his posts that lead me to believe he hasn't over dosed on humility. I don't understand your post.
>>17159637
>there's not really any way I can remove this friend from my life
what, are you conjoined? yes you can remove them if you so choose.
>>17159768
We share a lot of friends and are going to be in a class together so it would be awkward and petty of me if I just stop hanging out with the entire group because I can't handle my feelings for her
