Why can't I find a boyfriend? I've been alone since I broke up with my boyfriend of five years about two years ago. Okay I'm clinically depressed and I have a personality disorder and basically I'm insecure and anxious as fuck but I conceal it really well.
I'm actually considered very pretty and cute and I'm slim and I EVEN FUCKING SHAVE MY LEGS.
I'm clever and interested in science and shit although I also have Aspergers but no one knows that.
So basically I appear as a quality individual (obviously I'm not but it's not like I reveal my true fucked up self when I meet someone) but boys just aren't into me. Or if a miracle happens and someone is, I never feel anything for them, even if I try to make myself. I'm just so sick and tired of being alone.
Could be that you just haven't found another person you connect with, could also be that you're not as good as you think you are, or you're just unlucky. We really can't get into other people's minds and can't give you a better answer about you without more info
Do you approach guys or just wait for them to approach you?
Not a criticism, just trying to get a handle on your current strategy
>>17097060
Because your a nut job. Stop trying to ruin peoples lives and stay single.
>>17097089
Agreed. Its irresponsible to have mental illnesses and then fuck others up by getting into relationship with them.
Natural selection and die alone for mankind.
>>17097087
Well if I think that someone might be interesting I just approach them and see how it goes.
I don't ruin people's lives. I just need to be alone sometimes and I cry a lot. I'm on loads of meds so I'm not completely nuts. Lots of girls are much worse girlfriends just because they are jealous bitches.
Me and my boyfriend broke up because I was too depressed to take care of our relationship. We are still best friends (shitstorm about to hit I know it - but every relationship is different and some people actually manage to stay friends).
>>17097130
Also I keep my demons inside my head. I go to therapy twice a week and see an actual professional so I never use my bf/friends as makeshift therapists unless they ask me to tell them what's going on inside my head/how I'm really feeling or something. I'm far from a perfect girlfriend but I'm not as bad as you seem to think. My issues make themselves known in a relationship by my general malaise/tiredness, problems with sleep and when I'm really stressed out. But mostly I just suffer by myself and that's how I prefer it.
Although you have a point about dying alone and natural selection. My neurochemistry has been fucked up since I was a kid and my imagery offspring would probably have some mental health issues as well, so I probably should die off to protect mankind. Although I can't reproduce so I think we're good.
>>17097209
you seem really really attractive to me, i'd love to have a depressed gf like you because im not always happy either so we can talk to each other often and be there for each other and stuff
where do you live op
Be honest op, are you uggo tier
>>17097060
>not disclosing mental instability to potential partners
>hiding aspects of yourself until you feel that a potential partner is sufficiently invested in hope of not being dumped
anon pls
we can spot this a mile away
not to mention it is extremely unethical to falsely represent yourself in such a manner.
shame on you. you need to sort yourself out before you even think about trying to have a relationship.
Is it me are are thirsty girl threads becoming more common?
Literally go out, spread legs, see what sticks.
That easy.
>>17097246
Well slow down famalam
Personally, I prefer the air.
But I also prefer if they slowly disclose it, because a lot of people like to be up front, which is fine, but more often than not, they use it as some bullshit excuse.
I mean seriously, I hate telling people I have depression because people use it as a scapegoat or think they have it when they're just being edgy, so they'll say it like they're some kind of special snowflake.
What I'm saying is, it's something you ease into, like maybe second date
>>17097253
She already said that guys were into her but she rejected them. She's obviously way too picky for that.
>>17097253
I want a qt adv gf
>>17097246
Okay the way you put it makes me sound awful, you're right. But I always tell my potential partners (had three of four after break-up) in the very early stages (like second or third date or even first date if it seems like something might come out of it) that I'm mentally very unwell, not trying to trap someone into a bad relationship. I don't know why it's so hard to believe. My issues are about ME, not other people.
Also, I'm not comfortable with people knowing about my issues. Should I represent myself as a tired, unwashed, crying pitiful mess of a human being? Just because I'm depressed doesn't mean that I should let everyone know so that they could avoid me like the plague. You make me sound like I'm trying to spread HIV or something.
Saying stuff like that makes me feel really bad - I know, this is the internet and when you complain about your problems in 4chan this is pretty much what you have to expect to be realistic.
>>17097271
Okay are you kidding me? Three or four men have been vaguely interested in me in two years and I'm picky? It's not like I have smitten men coming to me all the time. Only one of the guys wanted more than just a fuck.
Jesus you are annoying. I can kinda see why.
>>17097283
you just have to find someone that is interested in being with someone like you, anon. i know people like that exist
they want someone like you because you'll be their center of the world, you'll use them for happiness and they'll be there for you, making them feel more important
normies arent like that though
OP pic is so cringeworthy.
Anyone who has to tell themselves they have a "beautiful mind" most certainly does not.
>>17097265
>maybe second date
this is the absolute longest someone should wait in my opinion. im not saying you should open with "btw im fucked up and have xyz disorder", but as someone who has experience with people purposefully misleading me into thinking they were mentally stable and healthy and then proceeding to wreak havoc upon my life, i prefer to know asap
>>17097283
>Should I represent myself as a tired, unwashed, crying pitiful mess of a human being?
yes. if that is what you are, if that is how you see yourself, this is what you should show to others. anything else would be a lie. do you not like the way you see yourself, or the objective reality of yourself? work to change it.
>You make me sound like I'm trying to spread HIV or something.
you have the potential to be harmful or destructive to someone. to be fair, we all do, and i dont think that having a mentally unstable partner is as bad as the hiv by any stretch of the imagination. but you have to understand that any partner you may have could end up seriously fucked up if things turn sour. if you genuinely care for someone, why would you want to expose them to that? why not take the time to improve yourself and repair your mental state before entering into a relationship to avoid putting your partner through unnecessary suffering?
>>17097316
they obviously are saying they dont because they have clinical depression idiot
Okay. Never mind. Just tired of being always alone but hey, I'll just magically cure my depression of 10+ years and hope that I'll be feeling better before I retire so that I'm finally justified to find someone to love.
God people can be narrow-minded and mean to each other. I've never seen why anyone gets any kicks out of being an arse
>>17097292
Please respond, I'll marry you right here and now.
>>17097378
Tired of being lonely? Women amaze me with their stupidity, lower your standards and you'll find someone to keep you company OR workout, improve your attractiveness and attract a higher quality man. Otherwise fuck up and enjoy the rest of your life with your cats.
>>17097449
It's not like my standards are very high. I don't care about looks that much, I don't like ripped guys etc. I'd just like to find someone who wants to have more than just occasional drunken hookups.
Also, like I said before: I am considered very attractive. I don't think so because I kinda hate myself but I know that if I told people that I don't like my looks they would think I'm fishing for compliments. If I look at myself objectively, I am attractive and very fit. Why is it so hard to believe? I have beautiful friends who are also lonely.
And please come up with something more creative than cats next time. Or preferably, don't comment again. Ever. In any post. In the whole internet.
>>17097472
What are your minimum standards?
What is your ideal match?
>>17097060
will you be my gf?
>>17097489
this, op
>>17097489
I like big black dicks
>>17097472
Look lady, either your looks at butt fugly or your personality is. Nothing else too it, there is no mystical powers at play, ugliness deters potential partners whether internal or external.
You need to get your head out of your ass and into reality, no one gives a shit about your bullshit.
>>17097501
well, in that case you should go to a club of some sorts. why are you so angry about guys only wanting to fuck you when that's all you want?
OP is a real human piece of shit and will most likely die alone
>>17097060
>Why can't I find a boyfriend?
Because you sound batshit insane.
>>17097489
Either someone who's 23 or mature for his age and, well, it would be nice if the guy was at least my height which is really not hard to achieve since I'm 165cm. Also I'd prefer someone who's not obese or super beefy because I'm not usually very attracted to seriously fat or rippped people. Normal or above IQ (not into mentally underdeveloped people) and no psychopathic/narcissistic tendencies. No extremely weird fetishes. Someone who wants an actual connection with another person and not only sex. And no, I'm not asexual or a prude, I just want more than sex, which doesn't mean I don't want sex as well, because obviously I do.
Now please tell me, do I ask for impossibilities?
>>17097516
Sry about that ruse, I'm not the OP.
Honestly speaking there are only two main reason girls complain why they can't get a bf: they are either fat or ugly.
>>17097522
Show us a picture of you. NOW
JESUS CHRIST there are some seriously angry people here! Calm down for fuck's sake, people who wish other people to die alone must have some pretty deep issues of their own
>>17097522
Translation: I want a guy with MONEY, who is atleast my height but preferably much TALLER, not attracted to fat because eww or steroid infused monsters but you need a GOOD BODY, someone who wants a connection with me.
A K A: I want chad that won't pump and dump me.
Fuck off whore.
>>17097536
Just bantz
I'll be your bf senpai where you at
le >>>/r9k/ army has arrived xD
>>17097538
Are you actually so stupid that you seem to think that you can magically read something like that between the lines? Fuck off. People like you make me feel better about myself.
>>17097522
Those sound like entirely reasonable standards.
What is your IDEAL though?
Because you're either lying to us on what you're looking for or you're very unfortunate, and all I could suggest for you is to meet more people.
>>17097060
Sup girl, another femanon here.
I found my first bf at 31. Never had a bf before. I was a bit sad about it at times during my teenage years but I would've rather masturbated to Edward Cullen than be with a guy I don't like. I focused on getting a degree, getting a job, pursuing my interests instead.
I didn't even had to do anything special for him to attract my bf. I became a positive, well-adjusted person whose fantasies were a source of energy for herself rather than a drag, and he fell for me hard. Wants to get married and start a family with me, wants only me, no longer interested in anyone else, etc. Serious pure true love.
So my advice is, stop looking for bfs and worrying about men and start looking out for yourself. Get a good job, pursue your interests, go out and make friends, do activities you find fun, that sort of thing. When you become a confident positive person happy with yourself like I did, you'll start naturally attracting good partners like a magnet.
>>17097522
You just described literally the bell curve distribution of the man population...
>>17097575
> Serious pure true love
kek, you know how much pussy he's wrecked before you?
I have no doubt he's smitten, but there's no way an inexperienced virgin like yourself will ever be able to satisfy him like he's used to.
>>17097567
I don't know. I've liked guys who had been much taller than me but also guys that have been the same height. I've liked skinny guys and just normal, soft guys. I've liked guys with light skin and dark skin, with light hair or dark hair, with light eyes or dark eyes. I don't have a mental image of the man of my dreams. I seriously don't care about the looks that much, like I said I just want to be able to talk to the guy about more than the weather or who slept with who in last night's party.
>>17097587
You fucking heightist!
>>17097060
>shave my legs
>sick and tired of being alone.
are you in europe?
>>17097522
Does your name start with an E?
>>17097587
i hope you realize how many people you're attracting to you just by saying this, and how many of them are serious about talking to you (me)
>>17097575
Thank you, that's actually really good advice. It's just hard to try to forget about loneliness and being single and just concentrate on other things. I probably should've asked for advice on how to get over being a single and focus on other stuff instead in the first place.
>>17097602
Nope.
>>17097596
Yeah, in the UK.
>>17097587
Well, to be honest it seems like the fact that you don't have a specific ideal in mind might be your problem. You need to have clear goals in life if you ever want to achieve them.
Until you figure out for yourself what you want, you can't really expect to find the person to fulfill your expectations.
Again my suggestion stands, in that you need to meet more people. No one is saying you have to blow 1,000 guys, but you really need to figure out what you are even looking for in a guy.
>>17097610
that's too far away from Hamburg :/
never stop shabing your legs pls.
>>17097615
I would say that she does know what she's looking for in a guy. It's not good to have specific requirements or some physical look the guy should meet as much as possible. What matters is the kind of person he is and how he makes her feel.
>>17097615
Thanks for the advice. I should go out more, that's true.
Generally men can smell crazy on a woman from 500 yards, even if you're trying to mask your mental problems.
In my opinion get help for your issues, when you feel better and more confident in yourself you'll be beating them off with a shitty stick.
>>17097644
Thanks for the advice. I'll do that.
