GIOYC
- Home
- Board: /adv/ - Advice
- Reading: GIOYC
hey, you've got a thing there. right there. its on your chest. yeah right there. should do something about that.
wish my heart didnt hurt so bad when people do little things that upset me
>>17025258
Why are girls in anime so perfect but shit in real life?
>>17025266
Because they are the dreams of other lonely people.
>>17025276
I'd rather dream forever
Been on a dating site for two weeks. The first 4 days I had 4 ladies initiate contact with me. I'm very shy. Nothing in almost 2 weeks. I'm going to initiate contact with some tonight. I'm very nervous.
>>17025266
God you're a faggot.
>>17025297
>>17025308
You're not helping your case any here.
Fucking annoyed, though not pissed for some reason.
But this sums up the whole deal.
So I asked a girl out, and she accepted, but the night before she told be a friend of hers from our class wanted to tag along
So they found me, and we decided to go to the Gardens on campus, and he began joking with her quite abit incl some more sexual jokes, but she did not seem to into that. After like 45 minutes or so we went back to the campus center. She was going to go and sleep somewhere quieter on campus, but he asked her to go somewhere with him (Asked a few times before she agreed)
Now, during the class later, a friend of mine mentioned that he was getting a bit too touchy with her, and she seemed visibly uncomfortable with this whole thing.
I think that she realizes that he only wants to fuck her, and is not buying into it, but does not want to cut it off as he's one of her few friends.
>>17025320
You haven't been here very long have you
Fuck you for coming into my room, looking through my shit and getting me into trouble.
Thank you for putting the nail in the coffin for our relationship. We should have never been friends in the first place, and it was based mostly on convenience and not love.
The longer I leave this, the more it hurts me. I thought time would help me get over it. But it isn't working. I'm missing you so much. Our conversations at night, recommending music to eachother, listening to music in the grass, holding hands, the Grimes concert we went to.. I thought there would be so much more of that, more concerts and memories to be made together. I thought we'd make it. I thought we'd stay like this forever.
I don't know what to do anymore.
You hurt me and i thought it was the end, so I hurt you more so I wouldn't feel like the victim. I wish I hadn't, I didn't want you to see that side of me, cause I hate to show people how vicious and pathetic I can be. I reached out to fix things about 4 times over the next month. Is this really it? I kept reaching my hand out, to you who has no other friends and who cared so much about me, and you're alone now and won't allow yourself to become close with me again. It hurts me. I wanted to make you the happiest person alive. But I only stressed you out and hurt you in the end. You've blocked my number and my facebook. Is this the end? Is this really it? I don't know how to reach out anymore, and I think it would be very desperate/pathetic of me to try when you've turned me away so many times now. I think in time you'll come back. I hope you do. I never loved someone like I loved you. Our friendship made me feel infinitely strong and fragile at the same time. And I wanted you to feel like a burning sun, and me a glowing moon
Masturbation may keep the sexual urges away but it does nothing for the loneliness, there's got to be a better way to be alone.
I just don't understand.
What is wrong with me?
Medication didn't help.
Therapy didn't help.
I just feel like I'm alone in the dark and that this entire game we play is utterly pointless.
I don't see what the point is raging against the darkness.
I think it's just that I'm sick of life.
WHY THE FUCK IS IT NOT FUCKING WORKING FUCK
I love you so much, and I've been waiting to tell you for almost a year. I'm going to be destroyed emotionally when you're gone
I just want to date a normal guy without a shit ton of baggage. Jesus fucking Christ. Like let's go get coffee and talk about the weather and other banal stuff. I'm not your fucking therapist.
Life is too easy. I'm bored, and no one is offering up a challenge for me to accept. No one understands what it's like to not have to face a daily struggle, apparently, and whenever I bring it up in a serious setting with someone I trust they tell me to stop being weird. I'm sick of being congratulated and awarded. Give me a real battle just once to help me prove I can do difficult tasks.
You better not break my heart
I really don't think you will, though
>I write erotica for cash
>Some guy wants to pay me $100 or so to write erotica about clowns, because he has a clown fetish
>I have to finish writing my debut story for Amazon first, and then another story for a furry about him having fart-sex with his skunk boyfriend, before I can get to him
>These people make me giggle so much
I also started writing a novel that is probably utter shit, since I'm 1,000 words in (2 pages) and still don't really know what it's about. http://womaninbl4ck.tumblr.com
My principal investigator doesn't give two shits about me or my research, and I'm realizing I might not either. I'm sick of school. Someone please help explain this stuff to me. Please help me do a good job so that I can graduate.
I miss you, t
with my whole self
Still crazy for you
>>17025758
You just want to date a walking dildo.
>>17025794
Become a mercenary.
>>17025910
how do you break into this business? I've been told by people over my life that I'm a talented writer and I am not below doing something like this for cash.
Sometimes I miss hanging out...
But then I remember how much of an inconvenience people can be, and promptly return to my plans for world domination.
>>17025939
I started writing on FurAffinity for people with weird fetishes and eventually started taking cash. I recently quadrupled my prices just because I could (and straight-up told customers that was why) and none of them cared because they were too busy being horny, hah.
I only have about 130 followers right now, though.
I'm currently working on my debut erotic story for Amazon's Kindle Store. I've never written or had gay sex before, though (most of the stuff I write doesn't actually involve sex -- one gay recently paid me to write about wombles eating honey until they get fat... 'sexily'), so it's requiring a lot of research out of me.
>>17025846
They will. If not until they leave. Everyone leaves, always, no exceptions.
Be careful with whom you give your heart to anon.
>>17025794
I seriously laughed out loud here.
You are not nearly as amazing as you think you are. You're just a faggot kid that doesn't know anything. Seriously, how fucking retarded are you?
You don't sit around waiting to be challenged. You fucking go out and do it yourself. The fact that you are just waiting around to "prove" yourself makes it abundantly clear you have nothing going for you.
>>17025378
Just walk away friend.
Your story sounds similar to mine.
I pretty much burned the bridges on my way out, push so hard someone else caught her. Yet she came back. We tried to fix things. The love was there from both sides, but it wasn't enough to fix it. The damage had been done. Our trust in each other was fragmented. The short time apart changed us enough to not function well as a team anymore. I viewed her differently as I am sure she did as well.
Then again thats Life. Should just include the tag line of "Experiences may vary."
Best of anon. Try for it if you must, but never forget to care about yourself as well. Don't run yourself ragged, your no good to anyone like that, especially yourself.
Well, my boyfriend got really mad at me today over a video game...
First he told me "Don't play support anymore, just stop playing support"
Then he told me "I'm going to just play by myself from now on"
Not sure how to react to this...
>>17026194
Time to git gud
>>17026199
Yeah, it's honestly the only thing I can think of, guess I can just spend time training when he's working, didn't think he would get so angry, but if being better at a video game means fixing our relationship, I better get to work.
>>17026210
Do you have to play together?
Keep in mind that working together in gaming is stressful as fuck. I would recommend you guys just share the hobby, you have someone close to talk about stuff with. Maybe someone to calm you down after a bad game with the pubbies.
Playing together is nice from time to time, but always git gud for your enjoyment. If not it feels like a chore.
Pretty much what I do with my gf, since she's terribad that games and I rather just chat woth her about it than get mad because either one of us fucked up.
>>17026210
Grow up. Instead of training on a video game, join the rest of us here in the real world. Your boyfriend shouldn't get mad over a video game. Like, I get it. We've all been there. But tell him to quit acting like a child. You as well. You shouldn't let him shun you because you're not good at a video game and then come to a forumn for advice. You should talk to him about it, that's how adults handle things.
>>17026230
>come to a forum for advice. You should talk to him about it, that's how adults handle things.
>>17025667
smoke DMT.
Go to youtube, learn about it. try it
It has taken several people i know out of their useless mindset and showed them the meaning of life.
Smoke DMT
Smoke it now.
>>17026230
>come to a forumn for advice
Ehhh...you do realize where you're at, right?
Stop leading me on. You know how I feel so just tell me how you feel already. I would take a rejection over this any day of the week.
>>17026230
YOU TELL EM', HOW DARE THEY COME TO AN ADVICE FORUM ASKING FOR ADVICE!
Si senorita, it does scare me that you still think about the questionable thing from my past. I havent though about it since I stopped months ago. Its still on your mind though? Its ok; I just hope you dont think thatd still me..... I changed. For both of us.
>>17026338
Initials?
Holy fuck my work team has some retarded people in it. Also doesnt help that they are arrogant, while they makd no sense. Think they know more about certain topics and think I am stupid, while they make the most obvious mistakes and make up constuctions that make no sense when it comes to sourcing and the theory presented and yet they think I am the weak link?! They can fuck right off to their mothers dampy vagina. Holy fucking shit!
>>17026338
>that feel
It's a sickening feel. Shit onky get worse as time goes by. Eventually you crack and give, or make a move.
>>17025846
<3 don't want mine broken either.
>>17026194
>playing mobas with your gf/bf
NO.
Well actually you can, but don't do it often, and NEVER duo lane.
I fought with my husband like cats and dogs when we duo laned. He's aggressive and reckless and I'm rather passive and cautious.
We started doing him top and me jungle, so I got a better feeling of what I could control, and he was better leashed in his aggression on the top lane. So he wouldn't try to stupidly make a play if I wasn't calling it.
You still risk him bitching and complaining about being ganked, especially if he's the type of retard to push in with no vision or communication from the other lanes, in which case just leave that fucktard to meddle in bronze and go play something that you like.
Matched with a hot girl on Tinder yesterday. Second person I've matched with after being on there for two months, the last person replied a few times and then just stopped talking to me ad presumably deleted me. Messaged new girl and never heard back. Trying not to care. Caring a lot.
He said he was "sorry" for treating me like absolute shit and for being a huge cunt. He promised that he'll "change" and "be better".
Yet, all it takes is one tiny shit thing for him to go back to treating me like shit and like I'm nothing.
I don't know what's happening now, I don't know what's going to happen. I'm just tired of being abused by him when all I have to give is my love.
I hate this.
Is it really so much to ask, of the person who's supposedly "in love" with me, to stop abusing me?
>regularly sell stuff on eBay
>don't have printer, so regularly go to office supply store to print shipping labels
>girl working the print counter is absolutely adorable; has great personality (at least, while behind the counter in "work mode"), etc
>immediately become infatuated second time I had to print out labels
That's really fucking annoying. Now I have to either buy a fucking printer, or go to the next closest place that does printing, which is significantly farther away.
This is a stupid feeling.
I'm better than everyone else. I deserve a girlfriend. No one else does. I'm superior to all the other men. Fuck them all. They need to die.
>>17026497
How about telling him to kindly fuck off?
>>17026514
>t.Elliot Roger
>>17026497
Leave. People don't change. Had a gf like that. No matter how I asked, still got abused.
I don't care about most of my GF's extensive sexual history aside from the fact she's had multiple group sex with women and men. The thought of her and another chick slurping chad's dong together and going to town on each other makes me fucking furious, because she's openly said she loved it, and also openly said I will never get it.
I can get it from someone else but mentally it's not the same. I need it from her to know she's mine; otherwise in my head she still belongs to the guys she did it with. She's wife material, perfect in a ton of ways but I often have doubts about it because of this. however compatible we are, how can I be content knowing other dudes got to experience that fantasy with my wife when she was young & adventurous then I'll never get it. I'm left with waiting for her to turn into a frumpy prude because she just doesn't care as much about pleasing me as she did them.
>>17026514
With that kind of attitude, I sure wouldn't date you. And I'm bi, so I actually could.
I honestly like really need to be fucking railed by a good cock rn
Lately I've been depressed, paranoid, impulsive, anxious, and obsessive.
I need to do something that makes no sense, because I feel like I'll never find happiness if I don't do it, but there's no logical reason why doing this thing would make me happy.
I've been answering the door with my hand curled into a fist, or a knife hidden behind me, because I've managed to convince myself that anyone knocking on my door is going to try to barge into my house and threaten my family, and I need to fight them off.
Every night, I make myself go to sleep early, because if I stay up I inevitably start crying. The crying then escalates into a panic attack, and I hyperventilate. My emergency inhaler has been emptied in the past two weeks.
I've also been nearly fainting a lot. I'm trying to drink more liquids, but it doesn't seem to be helping. So I'm falling over a few times every day. I've already lost vision and fallen once today.
I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm medicated, but maybe the meds stopped working. I had an MRI very recently, so I know I don't have a brain tumor or anything like that.
>>17026562
>openly said she loved
>openly said I will never get it
>she's wife material
Nah, son. Dump that whore.
fuck fuck fuck how could i fuck up so bad? i hope she takes me back, she said she would call me, maybe i should call her? dont know what to say, i had nothing to say to her, couldnt even apologize properly, i cant express myself, what the fuck should i do? seppuku here i come
>>17026480
Mate. Read "the mystery method" and apply it. Swipe right to every girl and try and pull every girls number. After a while you get better at it and it spirals until your fucking every weekend. Im a 6 at best but i just studied and applied that book. Dont just think oh this isnt gonna work for me.. read the book and do it. Ive fucked 36 girls from tinder alone since the start of last year.
Good luck homie
Where do I find a confident girl that doesn't give a single fuck of how she looks in a picture, not afraid to break a sweat etc.
I'm about to kill myself
>>17026701
Why?
Don't do it tho, it's not worth it.
>>17026701
Don't do it, anon. If you want to talk about it, let me know.
>>17026515
That would not end well lmao.
>>17026528
But he could change, he might change. What if I leave, and then he does change? I don't rly want to miss out on happiness with him, and a life with him. And
>muh feels.
>lowkey kinda too scared to leave anyway, for a bunch of reasons.
>>17026893
He's an abuser. Yeah, he might change, but... he might not, and if he doesn't you'll only get hurt.
It's better to leave, and go find someone who won't abuse you to begin with.
>>17026701
Don't kill yourself, anon! See a psychiatrist. See a therapist. They can make your life not suck anymore, trust me.
It might take some time, but it's sure as hell better than dying.
I almost killed myself a week ago.
Someone just had to interrupt me...
Of course of course.
I decided I should work on things some more and maybe its fixable.
At some moments I find myself regretting not finishing myself.
But, I have a job interview today and that's a good thing... If I can get the job things ill be a lot more okay.
Delusional. Pathetic. Loser. Lonely. Coward. Weak.
Why yes, I want more than sex. Why didn't I said anything? Because you didn't ask and I assumed the answer was 'no'. So what now? Are you going to pretend everything is aight between us, because I won't.
I wish I met somebody I wanted more than you.
Goddamn I'm bored. I'm bored of being bored. I'm bored of all possible solutions to boredom.
This law degree had better have some fucking interesting people on it, or I'm gonna get bored of that, same as I did with computing.
I just don't care any more, and as much as I want to blame it on depression, I know I have that beaten. I won that fight. Now I need a new fight, and I can't find one.
Also, I'm eating better than I ever have, and I still can't gain weight. The only effect I've noticed is I seem to need less sleep, which means I'm now bored for an extra 4 hours per day.
Fuck this gay life.
>>17027036
Is this a description of yourself?
>>17025258
I miss my delusions from my bipolar mania. I mean I am happy to be on medicine and stabilized, but the euphoric feeling of mania was enticing.
I fucking hate dogs. In today's world, this is tantamount to saying you're a supporter of Middle Eastern terrorism or being some kind of psychopath. But I don't care if it make me a social pariah, I can't stand them. People give dogs such a lofty status in American culture, because according to dog lovers, they're loyal, give unconditional affection/attention, always stick by you, etc.
This is all a bunch of bullshit. Loyalty implies a conscious choice to remain in the company of someone. Dogs can't just pack up their little doggy suitcases and walk out the door. They have ZERO choice to be with you. For one, they depend on you for survival, and two if you chose to always leash them, then they couldn't escape/wander off even if they wanted to. That's not fucking loyalty. They're "always by your side" by virtue of the fact that they either A) Depend on you for food or B) Its physically impossible for them to be anywhere else.
Other things that piss me off about them: dogs are incredibly neurotic animals. They react erratically to the smallest, insignificant changes in their environment. Gone for a few hours? Dog will get anxious and exhibit destructive behavior. Food dish isn't in the exactly right spot or is slightly dirty? Dog won't eat and will starve itself (never mind that it licks its asshole and crotch non-stop, but hey a dirty dish is tooo much to deal with apparently). Cat got some food the dog wants but can't have? Dog gets angry and pees on the floor.
And this isn't even covering their horrid smell, the shedding, the constant staring when you eat and sneak attacks on your food if you aren't careful, loud barking (I've never said, God I wish that cat would STFU), and the need to be taken outside multiple times a day regardless of how shit the weather is.
Dogs are just a way for people to pretend they are "loved," without actually seeking out human companionship. Your dumb dog would love any other person just as much, fool.
>>17027121
Medfag here, if you think you'll find interesting people in law school you've got another thing coming.
That's what 4chan's for.
And damn, you sound like you need a hobby as bad as some anons need girlfriends.
>>17025266
>life is empty as fuck
>try to fill the void with escapism in anime and VNs since it seems to be all the rage these days
this was a bad idea
at least now I know why weebs are so miserable all the time
>>17027209
Mania is one of the best feelings in the world.
>>17027213
Clean, quiet, well-behaved dogs exist. They're not as common as they should be, but don't write off all dogs completely.
That said, totally agree on dog smell. The scent of a dog is fucking vile.
I miss those dogs more than I thought I would, even more than a year later.
Now and then I will dream that they are asleep next to me, only to awake and see that they are not. I never thought I would miss them being so difficult, and yet I do. Even the small things...
I had B for years before you, and miss him terribly. A we shared, but I loved her no less. Thank God we never had children, as this was difficult enough.
I wish I could see them, but I know you better than that.
>>17026967
Best of luck anon.
Get that job and improve things for yourself.
Is it normal to be suicidal over losing an ex or am I just weak?
Turning 21 this July
never had a gf
not even a kiss
that's it lol
>>17026967
You should really see a mental health professional -- like, a psychiatrist, and also a therapist. They can be really helpful; I would know, since I've been in your place (at least the suicide attempting part -- no one walked in on me, I tried to hang myself and wasn't good at knots.).
They can make your life worth living again, so please, get the help you so obviously need.
How to find a mental health provider: http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/mental-illness/in-depth/mental-health-providers/art-20045530
How to find a therapist: http://www.webmd.com/anxiety-panic/guide/how-to-find-therapist
How to deal with suicidal thoughts: http://www.helpguide.org/articles/suicide-prevention/suicide-help-dealing-with-your-suicidal-thoughts-and-feelings.htm
A list of suicide hotlines, organized by country: http://www.suicide.org/international-suicide-hotlines.html
>>17027526
Oh, I've already been in this thread -- I'm a derp, sorry.
Though what I say remains true.
>>17027521
There's more to life than kissing girls, anon. Like... everything else, for instance!
>also, kissing boys, though I assume that isn't strictly relevant since you don't appear to be gay/bi/pan
>>17027526
>>17027531
>>17027538
>triple posting
Its time to find a hobby
I have a lot on my mind right now.
I need to focus.
but I gotta hand it to you, you sure know how to trigger muh feels.
been a while since I listened to it.
>>17026382
Initials?
How can I feel so on top of the world and bullet proof one day and am crumbling into pieces the next? I can't handle these mood swings anymore, it makes me want to end it.
>>17027611
I don't know how severe those mood swings are, but this sounds like you need professional help. Things that come to mind are e.g. BPD, bipolar, anxiety, etc
Im mentally ill to some extent and i know it from a shrink not a self diagnose but the shrink gave me some fucking sedatives that made me feel like a vegitable all the time so i quit them and started self medicating with speed extacy cocaine and rarely a bit of xanax abuse. Im paranoid so i cant talk to anyone about my true state of mind and all i want is someone i can trust and be with. Broke up with my gf for 3 years cus i realized i dont trust her and she is too cold of a person to help me. Found a new girl at uni and i think she likes me but im affraid that being somewhat of a junkie(i dont look like one tho i always take care of myself when it comes to looks and im generally a handsome guy or atleast thats what ive heard)will drive her away and she already knows about a part of my problem because i decided to tell her and i hope she reaplies to my feelings or i think ill feel too bad and like she betrayed me and probably end myself.Also im affraid of pursuing her and i never really knew how to go after girls so im really terrified of doing it....It really bothers me that i dont trust anyone so ye feels like you are alone in this world....thats it i guess
>>17027547
Like you're one to talk.
>>17025258
Moving in with my potential life friend in 3 weeks.
Been planning for months.
And now my industry slowed and my hours are cut in half. We have first and last, so that's cool and all, but if this doesn't pick up soon, I may be in a spot of trouble.
Timing.
I feel like I'm losing my grip and no one can help me.
I feel confused right now, I have a hard time making decisions and often criticize my decisions. i find it difficult to stop myself from doing this, and it only makes the confusion worse.
Just realized that 4/20 is coming up next week. Should have weed to smoke on 4/20 this year. I haven't done that in a while.
>>17027509
Normal.
I'm sorry, anon.
>>17027637
Go to a new doctor and get some actual medication, you're going to end up fucking up your life and new relationships like this.
You know, it would be amusing to see you fall for the same guy again. I mean, I'm just a, in your mind, a piece of shit, right? How dare I, the scum of the era, talk behind your back when that's what you EXACTLY do with other people when talking about me? How dare I, the hypocrite, cry foul when you talk behind my back and tell you that it's ill-mannered while it's okay for you to do it but not others? How dare I, the abuser, the persecutor, comprise our friendship when it's you who make sexual insults about me? Shaming me for having a small dick when you've never seen it, mocking me for having bad skills in bed when we've never even touched?
I swear, people like you humor me. You are crazy, you think you have this figured out? But the only guys you are attracting are weeaboo, wannabe Otakus. You can show off your skills in dirty talk, but your stupidity is going to discredit everything you say.
There are two parts inside myself : one who wants to fight till my graduation and the other one that tries to make me give up. I don't know what I should do. I just don't feel I will succeed either way. Anyway I guess I'm posting here because I don't really want an answer. I just want to externalize a bit of that struggle. I also hope these two parts won't annihilate each other because they are my whole.
I can't stand seeing people's messy hairlines at the back of their necks. Everyday I take the bus and stare at the back of people's heads and it bothers me so much to see those overgrown patches of hair every one has going on both sides of the neck. It gets under my skin, I want to fucking grab them, sedate them and force shave/wax them off.
I would single-handedly own and run a barbershop made exclusively for the shaving/waxing of back of the neck hairlines, with regular check-up appointments for the re trimming. I would gladly do all of this for free if it meant I could do the shavings myself and would finally rid the world once and for all of shitty, messy hairlines.
haha don't wanna get obsessive here but for some reason i got a message from my friend at 3:33am whilst i was at your house on sunday and it was trippy and then i decided to look up the worst takeaway in the world on just-eat last night and everything was 3. 333 votes, address number was 3, everything to do with the delivery charge was £3 over £3, not available below £3. so right after that i went on facebook and lo and behold yours is the first post on my feed.
not your fault pretty good night and i dont wanna make things weird again, but i gotta talk to god now
what the fuck god, are you trying to trip me out man? you motherfucker. im not going down that path again. i might be spiritual but i was borderline obsessive and psychotic back then. what the fuck? why would you trip me out like that?
yeah she'd be cool to be with but i dont wanna see her as some obsessive soulmate or whatever, itd fuck up friendships anyway it's stupid. wtf. theres so many other girls out there that itd work with you know.
>>17028329
You seem fun
>>17028426
omfg 33 seconds FUCK OFF
>>17025258
Part of me seeks validation for choosing music as my future. Most people who don't shit on it, try to give fake affirmations, which is just as insulting. It never bothers me enough to stop working, and the prospects don't sway me from taking the risk, but it would be nice to come across someone who sees the same value in music and not just its marketability.
It hurts so bad but I can't fucking tell you that it hurts.
>>17028426
>>17028432
http://sacredscribesangelnumbers.blogspot.ro/2011/06/angel-number-33.html
>>17028466
Why not?
I don't even know why I'm on this dating site. I feel like even if I was to actually meet somebody (which is unlikely, because I've literally spoken to 1 girl out of about 60 that wasn't completely up her own arse) I would just disappoint them. I feel like they would expect me to be better than what I actually turn out to be. The whole situation would feel too forced as well. Where the fuck would we even go and what the fuck would we even do.
>>17028474
haha believe it or not i have read this before and i do believe it - it is very reassuring. though i take it with a pinch of salt too. she's the daughter of a freemason too. i dont think it has anything to do with that though. hopefully just all the shit im doing at the moment to sort my life out is the right way :)
It honestly feels like i'm just supposed to be alone. I have anxiety, depression, hair loss at 22, no self esteem and no self belief.
I'm far better than what i was and i'm coming to terms with my crippling fear of failure despite never failing anything. I feel like i am finally finding a balance in my life.
But if the subject turns to dating or even just putting myself out there my default is flat-out self criticism. I just feel like i'm not good enough, that i'm ugly, that i'm unattractive, that my mental health will kill any chance i have at a relationship, that i'm worthless and i am fearful of being hurt again like i was so many times before that i just cast away any idea of contacting anyone. Even if do manage to sum up the courage to make contact i'm spending an hour googling what to say.
All i do is just browse a dating sight and think about how happy everyone looks and remind myself of lonely and sad i am...
>>17028495
I hope so too, anon. :)
May you have the best of luck!
I'm depressed as fuck :D
I've slept for 12 hours but I still feel like shit.
Kinda just letting stuff ride out for now until I feel normal.
>>17027521
Same for me. You're not alone out there.
My year has been shit. I've been depressed, my anxiety has been chewing at me ever sense my classes started, and I feel un-needed from my friends. My loss of focus could just fuck up my life entirely and if I don't get into college I'm fucking screwed. I don't know what to do. I've literally done everything I can but I feel I'm just set up for failure. If I don't get my dream job what is there too me. I was held back in the fourth grade because I was bullied to the point where I was choked. I had no friends in elementary school and that still haunts me. I feel my friends are just here to be nice to me cause I am fucking stupid. I joke about being depressed at school all the time, but I probably do have it. As an 18 year old in high school I feel too old, not in the right place.
There is one girl that just has my hopes up. But I'm too scared too even aproach her. I know she likes me, all the signs are there, but I can't fucking bring myself to it. Everyone I ever liked has just ignored me. Even the love of my life. She won't talk to me anymore. So this girl is the only chance I have towards happiness. I just feel so unloved all the time that I've been scared of rejection all my life. I need her in my life cause I need something. I feel she could be the one too. But maybe I'm just over thinking things. Does she even like me? Or is she just looking at some stupid burnout that doesn't care anymore. I miss being happy and I just don't find anything fun anymore. Anything I used to love doing I don't love anything anymore. I've been rambling on so I'll just stop now.
>>17026696
By not inventing an image board made to humiliate, degrade and rate how good they look in pictures. We already fucked that up long ago son.
>>17028483
She would never trust me again.
I'm sorry I'm not as smart as you. Honestly I really, really am. You've made a huge mistake attaching yourself to me, no matter how much I love you- because I know that I'm just going to disappoint you in the end.
I'm probably one of the least determined, most cynical people you've ever met, and you don't know how scared I am for you to finally realize that once we move in together. I don't want to let you down. But it's going to happen.
So I'm sorry.
>>17028745
Initials please?
>>17027213
Dude... There is something seriously wrong with you. If you're jealous dogs are loved more than you, take a real, hard look at yourself to ask why. If you've just too much time on your hands to think about this shit, again, ask yourself wise.
Furthermore, whatever relationship anyone has or feels toward their pet, is none of your business so stop being a judgemental prick.
>>17028816
L M. But you're not him.
I thought she was into me
Wanting to hang out all the time, wishing she was here, complimenting me, sending hearts
Oh well, what can you do anyway
I am still into her
my mistake for thinking anything could come of it
Fun night, lads. Hope we'll meet again in 5 years
I'm scared. I wish my co-workers would be more transparent with me. Or... Just always be up front with me than go out in beak room and talk. I know there's the old saying if thy don't say anything then there's nothing to fret about but then again it's a salon atmosphere and everyone talks but I hope that I'm just over thinking shit then thinking it's people not telling things I need to know to improve so it won't be repeated. It's hard to say at times to trust myself or confide in mothers that I'm doinfine
>used to talk in a high, whiny sperg voice
>now I talk in a deep sperg voice
A girl I thought was super fucking cute at 17 is now 22 and ugly as fuck now.
She lost all of her youth in 5 years. She use to be cute, perky, adorable petite body, and great skin. Now she's frumpy, tired, worn skin, and lost all the cuteness and petite-ness she once had.
I can't imagine what shes going to look like when shes 30.
It has been almost 2 weeks now and i still think about you, i know you are poison to me yet i feel the need to get closer to you.
>>17027213
Christ you are fucking retarded. You have no idea about how nature works and even less how dogs work.
You want to know why they are so loyal? They are social, small pack animals. The reason they don't pack up their little doggy suitcase is because they don't want to. Their owner is the alpha and lead dog and they will do whatever they say and adore the affection their leader gives them. This isn't a hard concept to understand.
Your whole "dogs are neurotic" bit is incredibly retarded. What the fuck is wrong with you to actually think that way? Are you this fucking retarded?
That 4th part about their smell and other shit is just the signs the dogs aren't being cared for properly or trained properly.
Lastly, you can say that about any fucking human as well.
You're just stupid. You could have summed up your entire post with a single line "Hey guys I'm retarded and hate dogs because I'm retarded."
>>17029166
Initials?
>>17029173
Hers is D mine is X.
Alright, here goes. It's now or... well later, like next week or the week after. it's happening, can't fall through.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=id8Zo2EHQPE
who needs sleep. could do with more hours in the day though, could do with time to hit the gym to refocus my mind. can't focus on this paperwork so I'm here posting this pointless shit.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-9r7ezjl1us&nohtml5=False
I've realized, most people get to a point that they're okay with and seem to stop, I never understood it. I could never fathom why you'd just stop at some random point in your career, or financially. I've never been one to be satisfied and it annoys the hell out of people. I'm constantly restless feeling the urge to progress some way. I'm never going to be satisfied with how things are, I don't see a legitimate reason to be such. there is always room for improvement and I feel a certain obligation to push as hard as I can to move everything forward for everyone.
you know, I was satisfied once in my life. i mean really, totally content. I had never felt that before, had no idea what I was doing, and i indulged too much in it, and lost that person. that's what she did to me, that's why to this day she randomly pops into the forefront of my thoughts. she taught me what it was like to feel satisfied with life.
some would say its unfortunate, some would feel.. odd i guess that I'm just never satisfied with the way things are. a lot of people get pissed that i can't just accept things, that i nudge people out of their ruts they've worn into the very earth they stand on. fact is, I'm totally fine with it. this is how it has always been since before and after her, and it may always be this way. I live for progress, even the smallest progress, but I can't stand still. this has been a patrilineal trait for generations from what I can tell.
anyways I'm rambling and just sort of typing out thoughts as they happen. I've got shit to do and a visit to the gym Ive gotta keep
>>17029172
Dogs don't actually have alphas. Pack theory was de-bunked.
>>17029190
I'm good friends with a guy that has a dog sled team and they clearly act like a pack with one dog standing out from the others.
For fuck's sake even if you own more than one dog they will form a small social group with pretty obvious tiers.
It's like that for any type of social animal. Even humans. When you think about a group of friends there is always one person that stands out as the one that ties them altogether.
>>17029190
>>17029220
Seriously I'm reading on this and they all start out with headlines of "PACK THEORY IS A MYTH" but then later say something like ". Among the interesting things that were noted was the fact that while hierarchies did exist to a certain extent, they were very flexible."
most of it seems to be arguing over semantics. When I hear "alpha" I don't actually think of it as the dog thinks their human is another dog. But that the human is clearly the one calling the shots and the dog knows it And if the dog were to try something that pisses me off the dog will know I wouldn't let him do that shit physically.
The same can be said to a dog that is bigger and more aggressive. The other dogs know they will get their shit kicked in if they tried to take anything from that dog.
There's clear evidence that dogs in a pack know where they stand, It might not the true definition of "alpha" but what the fuck ever. It's clearly something that happens, to an extent.
>>17028998
What happened?
I'm just so tired.
I lost my job about a month ago.
At first I was fine.
I had enough for rent for a little while.
I'd be OK.
I'd find a new job.
I was optimistic.
Now that optimism is gone. I just sit at my computer all day. I'm always bored.
I keep checking my emails but I never get anything.
Now I'm drinking too much again. I had a good period going.
But now once the sun sets, I just want to get fucked up.
I'm just so tired all the time.
>>17029284
I'd say
force yourself to get up early one day
and eat well.
And use that extra time to do something that feels healthy.
Like, say you get up at 8 am everyday and by 9 you're in the computer (also the computer drains your energy). Get up at 6 and, I don't know, meditate, excercise, read, anything you know you like doing.
Should give you a feel for what it's like to not be on the computer for a while
>>17029311
Days are so fucking long though.
I have good periods. Especially when I'm cooking.
But then it just turns into waiting.
That's what being unemployed is really about.
Just fucking waiting, all the time.
Girl I like has realized I'm a piece of shit no life retard and has stopped talking to me. At least we fucked three times, she probably regrets it now but that's her loss. I don't think I'll ever get a girlfriend, though. I'd like one but I'm just not capable of it.
I can't form intimate relationships with girls. I only get away with it when drunk but when sober, I feel so uncomfortable kissing or initiating sex or anything touchy.
>Also, tfw liver is possibly fucked but still keep on drinking
The company nurse is retesting me next month for my liver but at this rate I don't think it will improve
>>17029343
Hooooly shit, I didn't read this before I posted. Our situations are so similar that it is frightening desu. Cheers bud. :(
Yea, this guy is just giving off bad vibes.... Actually kinda afraid he'll do something stupid or illegal just to bang her, with or without consent.... I am serious, I am actually worried for her...
awwkay
So what if..
I mean, Ruby is actually p cool but... object oriented? sigh....
Perl is cool too... maybe I can use Perl, there's that Higher Order Perl book as well, p good, I actually learned some new stuff just by reading the first few pages.
Anway. What if... okay, what if I just, like, focus on getting some Perl under my belt and try to use that for freelancing.....
Anyway, the idea that got my attention was that I could travel... maybe? and write perl for the bux.
Fuck I still don't know how to sell my programming skillz.
Also Networking or system security... uh....
>>17029384
you the same guy that posted in here the other day about that real weird date where she brought some dude that was overly sexual and shit?
tell her.
>>17029322
sounds like you should be doing something involving cooking for a living.
how about you volunteer doing cooking for something while you've got all this free time killing you? or like go to a cooking competition. might meet someone that can give you a job or something.
start a cooking tutoring class as a business. start a business selling cooking supplies both commercially and retail. some kid started a truffle business in NY I'm sure you can do something too.
working for other people is crap anyways.
you've got all this time, time to start killing it instead of it killing you m8.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UWOQHj_o6eo
listen to good music, get your mind right, make a plan.
>>17029523
Possibly the same guy.
But yea, I should... But part of me wants to leave it for now, while I try to get with her.
I haven't posted on here in awhile but you're starting to make me worry again.
You haven't done anything wrong to let me think why I should feel this way
But the last time my gut told me something was wrong I turned out to be right.
I really want to be wrong
Before we broke up I would ask you if you loved me from time to time, just to be reassured.
I stopped doing that after we got back together. I don't want to know when you stop loving me again.
Well... I have lots of regrets in my life. And many missed connections and friends I wish I kept and talked with more before I lost touch with them. I've had a fine life. Not amazingly great, but I feel it's been decent. I can't stand decisions people around me make (more specifically, my brothers and my mother's friend), they're seriously NOT sound. On the subject of my brothers, they're both... lacking a kinder word, pricks. One of them not so much, but the other one takes the cake. And shoves it down the garbage disposal. I REALLY hate my mother's friend. She's been living with us for 25 years (currently 21), and she only recently got a serious job and actually is helping around instead of sitting all day. Which is hypocritical of me because I'm working on getting into College, but I don't feel I'm doing it fast enough.
tl;dr I hate the stupid as FUCK decisions people I know make, and wish I had more than I have now as far as life accomplishments goes.
I wish everynight I had more booze to drink.
I don't have anything in my life to be sober for.
I just want to drink until I'm happy. Every night.
I just want all my responsibilities to go away without any consequences
Fuck you for friendzoning me because I'm shorter than you. You say I taught you how to live and I'm the best person you know, yet you are planning your future with a guy you barely know. I thought you are smarter than this.
Thank you for getting me slightly drunk. I needed that. I needed you. It was nice. Hope to do it again soon. I'm gonna hate myself tomorrow but it was worth it. I'll remind myself of that.
>>17029720
and you'll keep talking to her too like a fucking idiot. That way she can use you for all her emotional support and then fuck the guy that's more attractive than you are.
This is why I never continue a friendship if I get turned down. Really, the big problem I have is I meet a new girl who then proceeds to flirt with me a fucking lot. Then like a week later she will tell me "oh... I have a boyfriend I can't keep talking to you like this. Still want to be friends?"
I just nope right the fuck out of there. Happens way too fucking often.
>>17029322
Restaurants are literally always hiring line cooks and you don't even need experience really.
>>17027521
haha, well for starters I don't mind being single and stuff but it does makes me anxious sometimes when I see couples.
Glad to know I'm not alone
and yeah, surely not gay or bi.
I wish the last 6 years never happened! It started with my children getting hurt by their uncle, their father not being able to deal with it all and turning to drugs and having a lethal overdose at 32 years old, my father dying 8 days after that of lymphoma and leaving us all alone, the sick bastard who hurt them only getting a 3 year sentence, and trying to survive the last 3 years all alone in a different city. I know I sound like I'm whining and boohooing but I'm just being honest. I wish every night that I just won't wake up and every morning I feel like I'm smothering! Like I'm never going to make it through the day, like no matter what I do or sacrifice for the kids that I'm still a major let down and they deserve better, they deserve a mom that would have been able to keep them safe and a dad that would have been there. If anyone has ever been through any of this or understands that desperate feeling and has any positive advice please share!
>>17029737
She's not some random chick or I would of already told her to gtfo. She's been my best friend for the last 2 years, she adds value to my life (not sexually of course, but there's other girls who do). I'll always secretly hope we hit it off one day.
Why don't you want me? I would do anything.
>>17027623
Doctors speculate that it's bipolar but doesn't bipolar has longer spans of mood swing cycles?
I want you to want me. I want us to wake up in the same bed. I want to kiss you really soft and sweet. I want to feel your breath on my face.
I can't let you go...
You were a genius. You were also manipulative and controlling and you pissed me off when you were too lazy to get up to something that took five seconds, and you treated others around you like shit, but you knew how to do it just enough that you would be taken care of. You had a bad past and you had to it in order to survive.
When you realized you were attracted to me but couldn't control me like others in your life, I kind of mindbroke you and everything about you reverted back to all your pain. And it was good and bad, because you needed me to fulfill that aspect for you and I wasn't ready for it, but I was willing to give it time to help you how I could. You were able to cry again, and you hated it even though it gave you something you were so desperately wanting in life.
And I wanted you more in a short time than anyone in my life. Your intelligence, your attitude, your interests, the way you didn't hold back what was on your mind, how you held me in bed, and your dreams were more in tune with me than I could have ever hoped to find in my life...
I'll get back into the career I originally wanted to do, and make enough money that I could care of you and help you not be afraid because of the fucked up shit that happened to you as a kid. And I'll find you again and ask you one more time if you want to make it work out. And I'll find a house for us, for you... and me... and I'll take care of you the way you needed...
And I'm so sorry... God I'm so sorry.... I don't want it to be this way... Please I just want to talk to you again...
>>17028703
I like you.
Been feeling really depressed for almost 5 years now, ever since I started college. I always put off talking to someone, mostly out of pride. Three years into the bout, I started having suicidal thoughts. Should have been the point to seek help, but I guess I was too stubborn. Amazed that I've kept it together after the dui and being stabbed in the back by Salinger. I've lost almost everyone, but the few people still close to me give me hope that I'll eventually see better days. I need to stop putting off finding a therapist, so I can finally be at ease.
>>17025287
How did it go?
When i was 21 i was raped by two gay gangsters. I was threatened with my life if i ever spoke out about it.
I'm 27 now. I'v become really frustrated i can't hold a job down and i have a hair trigger temper. I can't stand any one touching me (especially guys) and i'v not been able to have a serous girlfriend for years.
I have decided the best course for me is to confide with someone.
>My mum
My mum used to be a nurse and could offer good insight. The con is my mum worries a lot about me as it is and i don't know if it's a extra worry she needs.
>My best mate
My mate would understand and it would make a lot more things clearer to him. Con I don't want him to think less of me
>My cousin
He already knows as i went to his the next day after it happened and told him. Con bringing up old memories will be tough with him since weve not spoken in years.
>A doctor
Has medical qualifications Con has no emotional attachment
Who do i confide with?
>>17029157
Isn't heroin just great?
>>17029845
Who broke whose heart?
Idk how much longer I can take this.
Suicide is beginning more and more to look like my only option. I have nothing to live for, and I fuck up everything. Whether it's my job, my near perfect relationship w an amazing woman, or chances at fucking a really cute and cool girl.
>>17029845
Your Initials please?
>>17029906
A psychiatrist of course. You mentioned trouble holding a job so I'm guessing you don't have a lot of cash to throw at a shrink but it seems like an investment that you really need to make.
>>17029842
I want you too, Anon :)
He's a predator; literally, and you're prey. Remember when he cornered you, forced you to kiss him? And you still are close with him. Still like him? Even as a victim... We both are, there's a "half secret" for you to put in your book.
It's like inviting a vampire into your house before they even ask your permission. Self destruction. Come on in and get me, I'm leaning back my chin for easier access to my neck. Take me...
Don't let him get to you. Ruin you.
>>17030212
What's her and your Initials?
Should I gamble $200 on the roulette table tomorrow? I would get my money back to positive profit
>>17029260
Nothing, just a small farewell party between friends
What should I do with the peanut butter the mice lick off my mousetrap?
Put some butter in a bit of paper towel so the mice will have to step on the trap?
Yesterday 29 traps got licked clean
2 snapped
1 dead mouse.
Maybe I should buy some gum candy.
>>17028719
What did you do?
>>17030219
Buy some stocks instead.
Wanted to post this in another thread about suicide but then I decided not to encourage another stranger to kill himself..Do it, honestly if I had a gun I'd do it. I'm 22 and I had enough of this shit. The same people that I hate, the same family that only cares about what value they can get from me, the same work eat do drugs sleep repeat pattern. What's even the point? There is no fucking point!!!!! I've done sex, most drugs, hobbies, varied jobs. Nothing is enjoyable and everything is pointless.
>>17030245
Damn dude i guess thats what happens
>>17026194
Join the club, my boyfriend went fucking crazy over a lost ranked game and told me he never wanted to see me playing the game ever again
Plan on leaving him soon.
>>17030353
Gay anon here, my boyfriend is the same way, he got extremely pissed tonight over a ranked match, told me he was done ever playing anything with me, so...yeah, fun times.
Every time one of my friends says something like "we/you need to find [you] a gf," or "hurr that [totally random cashier/etc] was flirting with you!" it makes me want to stab them in the throat; then I feel bad for thinking that because I feel like a bad friend. So fuck you, friends.
>>17029999
a
>>17029999
we both did
>>17029765
You haven't given yourself a fair share of time to reflect and grieve . I know we put on our solders hat and try to push through for our children, but that is more damaging in the long run. Im not sure how your financial state is but even the state could recommend some counseling for you, you should take the thought into serious consideration. In the mean time try and find an outlet that will mentally and physically strengthen you. Yoga is a good start and their are TONS of beginner videos on youtube.
I wish you well mama, youre doing fine
>>17025258
I really like this girl. Like, I could easily fall straight up in love with her if things keep going the way they are. We're both girls, and she's dating another guy. So I think I've gotta back off.
Hey.
I know times arent looking bright right now, ever since "THAT THING" happened you are just not the same anymore.
Come on man...
You managed so much already, you should be proud of yourself. But instead you're still leaving yourself behind.
You know bad shit happens to everyone, theres people that have it way worse than you.
But you dont seem to care, instead you get drunk everyday and go to the same grief everyday.
I'M SO SICK OF IT! SO FUCKING SICK!
If you go on like that you will die before 30 I'm pretty sure about that.
3 months m8, 3 fucking months and everything will change! You will finally be able to enjoy the bright side of life, why cant you just keep looking forward to that?
I know you better than anyone, I know what I'm talking about.
You can do it. Keep your head up. I dont wanna die.
I'm really starting to hate this fucking website. I swear to god I despise every single one of you worthless pieces of shit.
I'm just as scared about rejection as you are.
My wife and her sister became hateful of each other after the sister accused me of having sex with her a few years ago at a holiday party. I told my wife that she must have been drunk, which she was, and that she probably slept with someone else, which she is know to do.
The sister was not lying to wife. Not that I feel guilty about it, just worried the sister might bring it up one day. Doesn't help that I also slept with their younger sister about a month ago.
I guess I'm sorry.
>>17030611
Sjit, forgot to mention, the younger sister is pregnant. Likely from last month.
>>17030616
I also forget to mention that I'm going to file for divorce soon.
>>17030636
Doubt she'll find out. The younger sister can over a week ago for some "talking" and told me that she didn't want to fuck with my wife's happiness, so she's going to get it aborted. I'll probably stop it after all this. It was nice of the younger sister to do all this for her sister. Nice to see they still get along.
Being ignored is the worst feeling ever
>>17030658
>that feel you are being ignored by someone that thinks you are ignoring them
CABBAGE.. KNICKERS... ITS NOT GOT A BEAK!!
Well it would seem this relationship is coming to an end. Currently I feel fine. But when the time comes, I'm scared to think how alone I will feel
The guy I like is into both me and some other girl. After seeing her I'm getting the impression he lead both of us to believe he's more into the other one.
What a complete idiot.
>>17030505
:^)
>>17030611
>things that never happened
But if it does, you keep on doing you, this is funny af.
Please do that again when you remarry.
>>17030658
Ever made an effort to let your guard down and maybe check in on the other person?
>haven't talked in two weeks.
>doesn't ask how I've been.
>hits me up for sex.
Get the fuck outta here, sloot.
>>17030756
I always do that. They probably just dislikes me though.
>>17029797
Not necessarily; look op "(ultra) rapid cycling bipolar".
I feel like a horrible person because I can't decide whether I should dump my boyfriend or not. I think the reason why we're still together is because it's been over 2 years and he loves me. He treats me like a goddess who could do no wrong but it makes me have 0 respect for him. He's massively obese and isn't losing weight and I am disgusted by him. We get along ok but I find myself snapping at him a lot and treating him badly because he just takes it and I'm angry a lot. I know we should break up but I have this sliver of hope he can change maybe. Probably not. I am suicidal and hate life so will just kill myself soon to solve the problem regardless. It will fuck him up though
>>17030485
Initials?
>>17030851
Or just look up bipolar type 2?
Only three more weeks until the stress of school goes away for a while
We're gonna have so much sex xD
I regret not taking the chance. Try and fail is better than that.
>>17030867
Fag
>>17026078
If she left I don't think it would break my heart
Only if she lied
You know what I saw.
>Why are you talking to me?
>kek
>>17030933
what did you see?
>>17030872
Rude much
>>17030946
I saw the last bit of trust I had for someone crumble.
>CAPTCHA: cookies
I really wish I had asked if you were single yet even though it's fairly apparent you're not.
Man why you gotta go and date the dude from your shift? I mean it makes sense and all thing were unjust going nicely between us.
Whatever I guess. I still got C and D left but I realized I don't 'like' them. Like how I 'like' you.
Shit wouldn't it be mega awkward if you were like 22 or something? That's be weeiiiird. I guess not developing crushes on people you barely know might be a good plan after all.
Man, I like you a lot, but you are a one manipulative shitdick. Annoyingly insecure too.
Why not just go after what you want directly, with no games at least ONCE? Take an example from me. Does it hurt? Yes. Is it worth it? Yes.
Me and this guy were only friends since December and we stopped talking a few weeks ago because we had a huge fight. But, I really love him, and I know he cared about me too and valued my friendship (because he is a loner and everyone thinks he is weird and unlikeable except me, who really appreciated everything about him)... I think things blew up cause we're both guys and I liked him and I think for a while he felt the same but I think he was afraid/ashamed of being gay. Even though he's a loner he cares a lot about what people think of him, and I guess since there's still a lot of stigma attached to being gay he wasn't prepared to be with a guy. It sucks. I didn't really want to be with him, I didn't feel like he was ready for a relationship so I just wanted to be good friends and make fun memories together. Things got out of hand. It's very sad. In the end he did a lot of horrible things to me in an effort for me to get over him so this relationship/romance drama could subside, but he took things too far and destroyed our friendship.
>>17031117
>>17031117
I got furious at the horrible things he did and tried to hurt him too, in retaliation, because I was really upset that someone I loved would do such terrible stuff to me. It sucks. It's been a while now. I reached out to him many times, maybe 4 times in the past 3-4 weeks to try to fix things. I feel like it maybe is too late for us. Each time I tried to fix things he refused to be my friend again and I don't know why. He honestly has no one, maybe he genuinely thinks I'm a terrible person? I just wanted to make him happy and to love him and make fun memories together with him. It sucks. It makes me so upset, I've been drinking so much and doing so much stupid stuff to cope, I've never been this upset about a relationship ending. Do you guys think there is hope that he'll reach out and try to fix things eventually? I feel like maybe he needs time, probably, to sort things out for himself and figure out his feelings and stuff. I don't know.. I really hope this isn't the end guys, I've never cared so much about someone, it made me feel so good to have a friend who I really understood. It was fucking amazing. People thought he was a loser, but I thought he was my fucking brother, he was so incredible. I cared so much. Please tell me he'll fix things. Tell me it'll be alright, and mean it, I really need someone to tell me that this guy cares and misses me and will eventually apologise and I'll apologise and we'll go back to the way we used to be. I fucking miss him so much. Life was so amazing when I was with him. I loved it all so much. It was incredible. Fuck I'm so drunk and it's almost 2am and I really need someone to tell me I'm gonna be okay. I'm so afraid of moving on and him just becoming a memory to me and us never talking again, cause this really was the happiest time in my life. It felt fucking amazing. I'm so upset. I'm so so so broken. Fuck, someone hug me
The girl I like finds me annoying and her niceness towards me has just been an act. Feels kinda shit, but it's better to know now than never. She should've told me to fuck off right from the beginning though.
i yell at my children and i feel like absolute shit. next day comes, they push my buttons again and i yell again. it's a fucking circle and I need out
>>17031580
Right with you there. Smoke if you can, it really helps
>>17026562
The real problem is that she told you she loved it when you're really not okay with it, it almost seems spiteful
Last week i was my penis was itching and i was having slight burning sensation when peeing, i figured it was just a uti and it would go away, yesterday i had yellow discharge while fapping it up. i texted my BPD gf about it and asked her if shes ever been tested because of what i just experienced. I never cheated on her, been with her for the last 8 months and she had gotten tested 2 months ago, both came out negative for gonorrhea and chlamydia, she showed me the results. i went and got tested today, now i have to wait a painstaking ~2 weeks to get results. she broke up with me/i broke up with her because she thinks i cheated on her.
>>17031545
its allways the same mate, all of them are like this.
>>17031604
this is acctually quite funny s:
>>17031612
shit sucks bro, i might have an STD. i never asked for this. also this is probably one of the worst ways to break up with someone
>>17030231
RAT POISION GHE PETANUT BUTR
why do I get an urge to kill myself and feel worthless every April?
I know I said "You're the reason I regret being a rotten human being", but I'm not sure if I said it as a compliment.
No matter how I look at it, us being together has just progressed from "unbelievably difficult" to "Insanely unprobably".
Things were way much easier when I was alone, but I don't want to lose you again.
-------
-------
It's sad, but I need to accept that there will never come the day my mother stops seeing my as the living reminder of the biggest mistake she has ever made.
----------
----------
I hope your event fails.
I earnestly wish for it to be a huge let-down.
--------
--------
I'm already tired. A quarter of a Century alive and I still don't see a bright future, neither a happy present for myself.
I call it a "good day" when I don't wish I died/was dead in a 17 hour span.
>>17030852
I just... I don't need to say anything. Yeah, just that.
It's only been a month.... I barely knew you before this and now I can't stop thinking about you. I'm like a goddamn schoolgirl.
This thing we're doing... There's no way it can end well. We're all going to be hurt by it. I want to keep you in my life but I can't just leave my boyfriend for you. We've both got to stop being such selfish cunts about it...
>>17031688
I hope it fails, too. I don't want to go but I might have to just to witness something bad happening.
>>17031656
Perhaps you have seasonal affective disorder (seasonal depression)?
It's worth seeing a psychiatrist about, anyway.
>>17031742
>Perhaps you have seasonal affective disorder (seasonal depression)?
is that common on people who used to live on a hot weather but moved to a place with all 4 seasons?
>>17031742
>It's worth seeing a psychiatrist about, anyway.
pfff I can't afford those.
interesting Always though I just got depressed because it was my birthday and i'm a loser.
I miss you and I still love you and I get a pain in my chest when I think about you moving on and not caring that I'm gone. You're all I want and I can't stop wanting you. I wish you could be happy with me. I just wanted to make you happy. Please.
>>17031826
And can you give some examples of what you did to make me happy? Because what you were doing does not seem to reach that goal.
>>17030852
Initials?
Fuck you. You left the best thing you could have had to travel the world. I know we agreed we would try when you get back. But I already blocked you on everything and started fucking other people. Have fun coming home to emptiness
Retailfag here.
I feel like a genuinely shitty person for selling cigarettes to a woman over 40+ years old.
She wanted her first pack of cigarettes, and asked my professional opinion on what brand she should buy. She seemed giddy, excited about it as a prospect. I advised her against it, but made the sale anyway, despite the fact that I felt disgusted, as someone who had struggled to quit smoking, several times, and barely succeeded.
I could have refused that sale.
I've had nightmares about this woman getting cancer, and it being my fault.
I have a crush on my online friend and I think she likes me too, but she started to date someone else some time ago and wont shut about him. I lose all my sleep because I can't stop thinking about her and feel really bad all the time.
Should I just give up and forget her?
I often wonder what my life would have been like if we'd never met. I regret so much and have many good memories. Im slipping into depression again, all day I've wanted to end it all.
I need to know if you're interested. I want to move on if you aren't.
>>17030856
Type 2 has nothing to do with rapid cycling, it just means you get hypomania instead of mania.
>>17031735
I sometimes wish I could hold back all of my hatred. But things aren't in grayscale anymore. There's only white or black.
Before I would've stayed away from all that. But now I can't help but to take it personal. I think I'll go and see how things are, while hoping for everything to crumble.
>>17032106
Initials?
>>17032099
Initials please?
>>17032120
For H.
It's been two years, and you could've already married. I'm always afraid learning that you found a girl, yet, it's also my deep desire.
You were my first friend, the first person I appreciated spending time with. Really hoped you would shrug off that I stopped talking to you, quickly moving on and never bothering. Trying to keep crushing on you secret got me almost insane, you wouldn't like me like that. You wouldn't like me acting strange as I usually do at all.
All that edgy shit that a person can be a drug turned to be fucking true. And that crazy theory that in 500 days of summer, Summer saw how Tom perceived her and didn't like it, also seems more realistic.
Every time I tell myself, that I didn't have a chance, because you knew nothing about me and didn't want to, but I regret betraying you once again.
Never saw a person as pure as you, and probably never will.
My best friend and the girl i loved liked eachother and went dating, she leaved him because she was passing through a bad depression and i acted as a emotional suport for my friend while also trying to forget about her.Eventually my heart healed itself and i wasnt in love anymore,i talked to both of them one day, and the two of them wanted to start dating again but both didint know how to tell eachother and i fixed that.Now they are both dating again but...Dont get me wrong,Icouldnt be more happy about them,but everytime I see them toghether and loving eachother they just remind me that im fuking alone in this piece of shit of life.I just wish i had someone special to give my soul to.They have asked whats wrong with me since i have acted strange this past days,but i could not bear to tell anyone of them this shit.English its not good,but thanks for listening 4chan.
Ugh, I hate my car. Why does it always break down when I need it the most? I wish car batteries never needed to be recharged because I need to go to the FUCKING DOCTOR tomorrow morning and the standard jumpstarting method isn't working so I need to do it the FUCKING HARD WAY. EAT SHIT, YOU WORTHLESS PILE OF GARBAGE.
>>17032137
I'm a W who would say the same thing to my H t b h
>>17026893
look up battered women's syndrome and see if that's the kind of situation you want to be in.
I was supposed to hookup with a guy to lose my V-card today (im a fag), but when I saw him IRL I realised he was like 5'2 and idk, I just couldnt.
I feel really bad - im sure hes a great guy - i just wasnt at all into him and i figured id rather just go home than have embarassing and awkward sex.
Am I a bad person for not sleeping with him?
How do I salve my conscience?
I want to die but I'm too scared
>>17032258
talk to a psych, you will feel better once you lay it all out in the open
My ex girlfriend was a friggin' sociopath who thought she was a godess, and I'm actually happy because she has a shitty life nowadays. She lost all of her friends, I told her countless times:
"Don't be stupid darling, you have to be more humble, be more open minded, don't be so judgmental"
And after we broke up, she ended up bad mouthing me and a friend. For what? Because I hold no grudge against my friend, even if she did? FUCK YOU LUCÍA, may you and your dickless fag of an actual boyfriend may know what is to have respect! And maybe, you'll grow and be a decent human being.
>>17025931
I wish this was for me.
Dear D
I don't have the balls to ask you out after all this time. It's been too long, I ignored you back then like a fool and I know I shouldn't have. Your recent texts gave me hope since the only reason you asked around for me was to see how I was doing in life, but I really can't respond back for shit.
And now it's been almost a week and I can't just do it. Dunno if it's too late, but if you are still willing to talk to me after a year and a half of not seeing you again...
Dear A
You left me when I needed you the most. You didn't even try. 3 years and an engagement. I know, I was unemployed, but you said you loved me. That night on the bridge by the lake, you were wearing that white summer dress, I was braiding your hair, we talked about what to name our kids. But no, you wanted something else. When my parents divorced, you went to a party. I didn't hear from you for three days. Then you left me, fucked my best friend, and now I can't trust anyone anymore.
It's been six years. You're married. You got a kid. You got a manager position in another town. And I'm still here, still recovering from the fucking disastrous, suicidal depression you left me with.
Yeah, I've changed. I got a master's degree. I've dated others. But you've left me with an ache, and a mistrust that just won't go away.
That was supposed to be our fucking wedding pictures that our mutual friends shared on my facebook wall. That was supposed to be my kid. It wasn't meant to be like this.
You were a disaster, and even if there are roses growing from the cracks you left in my soul, those roses are black and smell like ash.
Fuck you, I'd forgive you in a heartbeat.
Just ask.
>>17032394
Some people don't want to be forgiven.
>>17032405
I know. Which makes it even worse that I still would. Fuck.
>>17031826
Initials?
I'm losing my goddamn mind.
Under 30 days to cram for my engineering exams. I am so behind that even 3 hours a day isn't enough. From what I've read and learnt about improvement and productivity, the plan I devised is not only not effective but it's unsustainable. It's the sort of thing that leads to you crashing and burning as opposed to succeeding. Not to mention I've done a plan like this in such a short time before, failing both times. But this is the only plan to do in such a situation, because any other effective plan would have had me starting to work months ago.
So here I am, facing a challenge I failed 2 times before, except the cost of failing this challenge is my Uni. And once Uni kicks me, the trajectory of my life is going to go in a negative direction.
And lets hypothetically say I succeed in this exam with all the odds against me, lets assume I pass everything. Then I have to start cramming for the 4 modules I have failed already, and it's the same issue again. Same odds, same setup. Short amount of time with a lot of work needing to get done.
And lets say I pass the second exams too and then I'm thrown into my next year, and a whole load of new information starts flowing in and this whole process starts again..
This wouldn't matter if this was the only thing I needed to focus on. While I'm holding tight to make sure education isn't going to float away, socialising has already slipped from my hand. I've lost friends and I'm losing them more and more. My actions and reputation from before holding me down. And because I have been so preoccupied with education, my social skills haven't been improved. I'm still a fucking loner in my course, I have no friends here after a year of being here and my current friends think I'm a loser. I'm still a kissless virgin.
I am losing my fucking mind. I will keep moving, I will keep fighting the good fight but goddamn do I feel dissuaded and demoralized.. How the fuck did I end up like this..
I want to fuck my boss.
>Mmm, yes sir.
if I got super drunk and high and groped a girl's boobs and ass but the next day people told me that was a friend cross dressing and that I was so intoxicated to tell the difference. Would that make me gay? i'm confused and my friend telling me he "enjoyed" doesn't help either.
I'm still crazy for you
>>17025758
I wish girls didn't treat me like an emotional tollbooth either. (I sound like a hypocrite but this is a get off your chest board and I held this back for a couple of months) I hated how she would constantly bring up stories about her alcoholic ex after we banged and how I would have to listen to stories about people I never met with very little context and most of these stories had inside jokes that I would never get. The only reason that I decided to date her was escapism and I thought she was beautiful. I am just dumbfounded by the fact she thought I was "stupid" and "vapid" then later I find out shes cheating on me
. For fucks sake babe, my friend tried to kill himself at that time, my dad was losing his mind and going to the nuthouse which lead to us finding out he had dementia. I wanted to escape my problems and I took solace in the fact that even though things were bad I had you. I really liked her to until I found she lost interest because I didn't "open up". Thank god I didn't you drained me and talk shit about me behind my back. Lets be honest I was a rebound guy nothing more nothing less
>>17032117
Wait -- what are you talking about?
>>17026194
What a dumb immature prick. It's a game, I will never understand idiots who get so bent out of shape over something that's supposed to be fun. He made you feel bad about yourself and he'll do it again because he's a pissbaby. Drop him
>>17029553
Yea... He's a bigger asshole than I thought calling out people who are more qualified than him on a topic in class
more of a meta thing but frustrating
>OP makes thread
>bump
>bump
>bump
>someone actually replies because thread is on page 1 and OP just bumped a minute ago
>OP never comes back
>>17031122
If I had a friend who I adored like you do yours, I'd be trying my hardest to right any wrongs and allow those feelings to blossom. It might sound gay as fuck but I've felt like that before and those feelings need to be addressed.
What did he do to fuck things up?
To that type of woman who calls out a guy as gay,
Convincing other people that I'm gay doesn't make me any more attracted to you. And doing it for my attention is just desperate.
If I do have to leave I really hope you'll follow me one day
I like it when I don't see you for a while and you become abstract. I like you in the abstract. In real life you scare me too much.
If she wants to reject me, just fucking do it. I don't have time to play a game with you saying your busy....
Though can be a legit excuse, but two of em? A bit fishy. She has given odd excuses before that have verified
I'm in love with someone who will never be mine
I'm sick of anxiety
I just want one normal day since I post my family
>>17032373
You a chick or dick?
I hope you haven't lost interest. I like you a lot. Please don't leave me hanging like this...
I need some advice
There is this girl I have been talking to
She is what keeps me going and re arranges me till I am sane.
The thing is that her father just grounded her. She is not allowed to go to robotics or else her phone and laptop will be taken away from her. Yes, this is a long distance relationship. She loves robotics and it's her passion. so should i give her up so she can follow her dream? I told her to wait since I believe there is always another way, but I am afraid it will have to come down to the worst.
not a pic of her but it sure looks like her
It's been a year. I see you from time to time. It wasn't even a true thing we had, but the tension was there. And right now, I don't even know what could possibly happen.
You probably still don't know the truth about it. Maybe you don't even care anymore. But you're special to me, in ways you'll never understand unless I told you. And all I want is to either move on from this whole thing that I've thrown out of proportion, or have another shot at it.
>>17033412
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TwUbXuQnW8E
because of you, i've always gone after the partner that i could never have, an i've ALWAYS left the right ones for me
>>17033415
Believe me, I've been saying that to myself for a year now.
think I saw my crush walking with some dude and I'm having a panic attack and drinking whiskey and benadryl fuck just let this pass this is a a major over reaction wtf am I doing I just want to timeskip.
>>17025258
I hate not having feelings. I want to love somebody. I just don't know how to do that anymore. I'm too afraid of intimacy. I don't know how to relate with people for any amount of extended time. Every relationship i have crumbles. If i think things are going good, i'm actually tearing that person down. I'm trying to find myself and find peace and balance. But i just can't in my current state, my current enviroment. I hurt because I have this remarkable talent for making people insecure because i'm insecure. I just want to feel things again i just want to feel confident like i used to.
Probably killing myself soon.
I fail at everything I attempt.
I have nothing to live for.
I opened my heart up to you, and confided in you, and you're stomping on it, you of all people should know how it feels too. Fuck. Why do I have to catch feelings
I don't really love you. You said it prematurely after I had gotten out of an abusive relationship and I'm really getting tired of you. I want to stop talking to you and I would if I didn't think you'd be fucking devastated. You don't even fucking know me and you think you love me.
>>17033501
Initials or story?
>erping with some girl on the internet
>start getting into the hard shit for the first time that she likes
>no response for over 2 hours
Welp, just sitting here like a dumbass now.
>>17033501
I know. I thought about it and I really don't mean that I wish something bad would happen. That was hateful. I would never want that. What I want is control. I want control over things I have no control of. It's the feeling of my life, over and over. An animal trapped in a cage chasing it's own tale. That's me. It's how I was made.
I feel like a fucking shit-head for trying to open up to people. Especially towards people I want to get close to.
I understand (at an intellectual level) that I have to, but it's just so fucking hard. I feel vulnerable and stupid, boring and lame.
What really hurts me is that there's someone I really like, and no matter how hard I try I can't find a way to open myself up to them, and this just ends up making things uncomfortable for both of us.
>>17033501
I'd hate to think that he thought this is how I feel about him. I hope if he did read this, he'd see how it couldn't be me and avoid the mistake
My mom died 2 years ago and I had to quit school (was going on 3rd year at college, art major) because I was pushed to the side during her medical treatments. I could've been able to go back with help from my dad without taking any resources away from my mom's care since medicaid was covering her but no one was really able to help me work out a way to keep me in school. I ended up going to community college for fall 2014-15 semester and was really happy about that, I felt like I was able to cope and focus on making my life better. But my debt from my previous school locked my financial aid and got me kicked from CC early. I feel like all the previous coping I've went through is undone and I can't really get a hold on my life anymore. I live with my dad and 2 older siblings who all work and I can't really bring myself to much each day besides fucking jack it and waste time not even playing games i like or putting in effort on my art or finding a job. I'm depressed, I miss my mom and I'm really at my wits end and all i can do is jack off I hate this
I'm the best at what I do and all these suckers can blow me
I'm supposed to be barely functional and these cunts are dragging behind me like morons, panicking about their shitty excuses for lives.
I will fucking grind them to dust and then I'll go pro
And I'll have the life I want and they're going to be fucked
Hey You,
I don't know why I'm here. I'm cold. But even though I'm in this blizzard, I won't stop moving. I'll do whatever it takes. Please just hang on to me, don't ever let me go.
You looks so pretty today. I can't stop thinking about you, of all people. But I know I don't deserve you. I'm sorry and goodbye.
Im about 90% sure i have SAD, im pretty positive it is fucking with my schooling, i dont like the idea of being medicated.
Or im just a lazy piece of fucking shit
2016 is the first year ive been legitimately suicidal
Why am I so envious of everyone?
If I'm not envious of people more successful or better looking than me, I'm envious of people who are able to happy and satisfied with less than me.
Why do I have so little self worth? Why do I assume everyone hates me? Why am I so paranoid? Why am I convince deep down my paranoia is justified?
I had another chance with you and I destroyed it with my selfish prideful behavior.
I wish I hadn't done that, but I did it and probably for a reason.
I will move on now, and I will try to improve myself and hopefully in my next relationship I won't do the same things. Lol, hopefully I make different mistakes instead. Then I can identify THOSE flaws.
I will always love you, all my life I will love you.
Goodbye.
>>17033771
Change your diet and i get that youre in school but look into an Ultra violet lamp, They sell small ones for desks. Both have helped me greatly over the years. I also changed my diet to include more hearty greens and animal fat to help with cognitive issues like brain fog.
in review
>Vitamin D supplements
>Ultra Violet Lamp
>veggies and bacon!
>>17033444
Because youre missing an important lesson from your mistakes.
Dont try extremes but maybe look outward fromt he idea of relationships and spend time with yourself for a while.
>>17033789
God, I wish this was for me
I gave this guy I loved so many chances and he kept ruining things.
But I would always forgive him, I'd always let him come back into my life and I'd always love him like a brother
>>17033876
Eyes like the ocean which reflects the sky.
If you recognize that line, it was for you.
>>17033326
Initials please?
>>17033884
God damn it. That's a beautiful line, but I don't. He's a H and I'm W anyway, there's no way our initials would've matched up yknow
My guy probably doesn't even come on these advice boards. But man, Harry, I wish you did. I wish you could see how I feel and the effort I made.
>>17033986
We must accept our fates unfortunately.
It is miserable. But we love them. That's what's important.
There's a lady who's sure all that glitters is gold
And she's buying the stairway to heaven
When she gets there she knows, if the stores are all closed
With a word she can get what she came for
Ooh, ooh, and she's buying the stairway to heaven
There's a sign on the wall but she wants to be sure
Cause you know sometimes words have two meanings
In a tree by the brook, there's a songbird who sings
Sometimes all of our thoughts are misgiven
[Chorus]
Ooh, it makes me wonder
Ooh, it makes me wonder
[Verse 2]
There's a feeling I get when I look to the west
And my spirit is crying for leaving
In my thoughts I have seen rings of smoke through the trees
And the voices of those who stand looking
[Chorus]
Ooh, it makes me wonder
Ooh, it makes me wonder
[Verse 3]
And it's whispered that soon if we all call the tune
Then the piper will lead us to reason
And a new day will dawn for those who stand long
And the forests will echo with laughter
[Verse 4]
If there's a bustle in your hedgerow, don't be alarmed now
It's just a spring clean for the May queen
Yes, there are two paths you can go by, but in the long run
There's still time to change the road you're on
And it makes me wonder
Your head is humming and it won't go, in case you don't know
The piper's calling you to join him
Dear lady, can you hear the wind blow, and did you know
Your stairway lies on the whispering wind
[Guitar Solo]
[Bridge]
And as we wind on down the road
Our shadows taller than our soul
There walks a lady we all know
Who shines white light and wants to show
How everything still turns to gold
And if you listen very hard
The tune will come to you at last
When all are one and one is all
To be a rock and not to roll
[Outro]
And she's buying the stairway to heaven
>>17032493
For A
>>17033994
Yeah. We do. Your post is honestly what I wish my Harry would say to me. I gave him so many opportunities to fix things and to come back into my life, and if your person is the same and has given you opportunities, I'm pretty much begging you to suck up your pride and send your post to them. I'm gutted knowing that my guy has made no real effort to fix stuff with me, when our friendship/relationship made me feel the best I'd ever felt in my life. If you love someone, don't let them go.
>>17033326
Initials...?
>>17033654
This is good. It's like gangsta rap. Just needs beatz.
>>17033742
I will never let you go. I think about those few moments in your arms, lying on your chest, wishing I could stay there forever. Stupid, I know. So stupid. But I accept that. I can have you this way forever.
>>17034010
True story: I had my first experience with a boy when I was 15 and it was a lock-in party at our church. I was lying on the floor and he was lying in the pew above me. All he did was touch my face very softly, he touched my neck, my shoulders, my chest, he told me I was beautiful. It felt so good. It was the first time a boy had touched me. It went on forever and he spoke to me so softly. All the time someone was playing Stairway to Heaven on the guitar. This was Valentine's Day, 1984.
>>17026194
fuck him, don't play support. go carry for the jungle and tell him to mcfuck himself when he gets rekt by his own stupid plays.
I wish I never started playing video games
>>17034015
And what are your Initials?
I don't know. I'm insecure as fuck. Insecure in every part of me. My looks, my personality, character, actions, everything. This is some kind of excessive narcissism. Constant self-pity and very low self-esteem could be transformed into very high self-esteem and feeling that "I can do everything" instantly and by random, but even the smallest trifle can ruin my feel of "self" and I'm getting into this vicious cycle again. I can't feel normal, it's either being powerless and feeling hopelessness, or some instantaneous feeling of ability to do everything.
>>17033501
I can certainly picture "my person" writing this, and it is a vent thread, so:
You were in an "abusive" relationship (I very much doubt they were the abuser, as it seems everything that comes out of your mouth is a lie) before us, yet you then became the abuser in our relationship. I always knew you never loved me, I just didn't want to admit it because I know that if I tried to leave, you'd just manipulate me more and hurt me more. You'd seriously physically hurt me. All you care about is yourself and fucking anything with 2 legs and a heartbeat; you used me for an easy lay and as your emotional punching bag. You turned into someone I can't even recognise anymore, and I wish I'd never met you, for you wrecked my life, ruined my relationship with my parents, made me lose my closest friends on more than one occasion, and destroyed me.
You became a monster. Maybe you always were a monster; I was just too blinded by your lies and manipulation and abuse that I couldn't see how cruel and sadistic you were right from the start.
I hope you remember me as the person you killed, because I'll never recover from the damage you've gladly and continuously done to me. I'd rather die than suffer with the pain you've given and still do give me.
If god is real, then I'll break his knee caps for making me an ugly male instead of the perfect cute girl I could've been.
What an asshole, seriously...
My life was ruined from the get go..
>>17025724
me too :(
Called 15 psychiatrists. Not one is accepting outpatients, or they'll only take cash-in-hand mild issues. No one is taking private insurance anymore. Fuck.
I have no idea what I'm going to do. This shit is getting to the point that I cant deal with it, and now that I have the insurance to pay for it, nobody wants to take insurance, and the ones that do either have no experience or knowledge on my issue(so they wont take me), or the wait list is 5 and a half months minimum(not that I've found any taking patients yet, I haven't.)
This shit is fucking hilarious. Try to seek help and it isn't there, but if I were to do my own damned drugs or whatever else, I'm the fucking problem. What the fuck happened to this country that even the doctors are only after a quick buck anymore. And why is no one talking about it.
>>17034474
Well society is trying to weed people like you out of the human race.
Depressed weaklings won't help us evolve any further.
>>17034483
I've got much worse than depression. What I have is also supposedly a chance of being hereditary, I wouldn't put a child through this. But that doesn't particularly mean I deserve to suffer for the majority of my life through no fault of my own, due to something i have zero ability to effect on my own.
Also, funfact: Humanity will no longer evolve in the traditional sense, once we hit large society, that sort of thing peters out into neverever territory. Any changes from now on would have to be manufactured in a lab, not by chance. The same lab that could solve my issues, for all intents and purposes
he's everything i ever hoped to find in a person and he likes me a lot so why do i feel numb and sad now that i've finally found someone
why can't i hold a conversation with him and close up whenever he tries to ask me something and come across as an idiot because i don't know how to express myself
it's only a matter of time before he loses interest in me and i don't want that to happen but i don't even know what i'm doing i just know that i really like him
Do I give up?
I need to know if I should give up.
It was the most amazing, fulfilling friendship I ever had, with someone I really love. We both understood and appreciated eachother. To me, it felt like a dream.
But things happened, we started hurting eachother and we both fucked up many times. We had a huge falling out. I tried to fix things and he blocked me on Facebook and blocked my number. My friends tried to reach out to him. I felt like he did more to me than I did to him, but I offered to apologise in person. I tried so hard. We all did. Everyone I loved put in an effort to save the relationship I had with someone who meant the world to me. It sucks. Time keeps passing by and I don't know what to do now.
Do I give up?
There's nothing else I can do. I can't reach his heart.
It's 3:24am.
Help me.
FUCK THIS SHIT
For the first time in god knows how many years, I have fucking butterflies in my stomach. C, a colleague mine; she's just incredible.
My boss, on the other hand, is being a complete fucking dick to her. She's been here for about two months, never got properly trained, even though he knows this is the first time she's doing a job like this. He's making sexist remarks all the time, though she can deal with those. It's the constant bitching about her, telling her she's not doing a good job, that gets to her.
Now she's going to quit. She's from another country, so that means she'll move back there.
I'll never see her again. Just... fuck this shit.
My girl and I have this friend. We are all pretty close. A couple of months back this friend and I admitted to having feelings for each other and I've since started going out with her behind my girl's back. The thing is: my girl cheated on me before and due to circumstances we decided we could move past it. I make it painfully obvious but no one suspects it. Or if they do, no one says anything. I don't feel guilty. I've come to terms with being a shitty person. This is who I am.
>>17034739
Never give up. Give him time and space. Reassure him you can fix this. You two can get better and heal together. Make him yours again.
>>17034039
I did apologize, I begged her on my knees essentially.
She wouldn't accept my apology no matter what.
>>17034039
>>17034979
You know what? I messaged it to her. Just because you said it.
I wish I was your Harry. I would have done anything for you if you were my Erin.
All my flaws didn't stop me from loving her, they just stopped her from forgiving me.
I have to improve myself, and it's good that she rejected me. It will force me to improve.
honey,
im so angry. i cant stop shaking im so fucking pissed. you accuse me of being able to control things that i have no control over. you get mad at me and expect me not to get mad too? youre so fucking passive, it makes me so angry. god, you piss me off so fucking much sometimes. i gave myself a bloody nose again last night because you were angry at me about something i couldnt fucking control. it made me feel so guilty that i cant always be in control, so i hit myself again. god, you make me want to kill myself sometimes. i love you, god knows i do, but sometimes you make me feel like a piece of shit. you haven't the slightest clue as to how hard it is for me to not tell you to fuck off sometimes. you have no clue. you dont notice how hard im trying, do you? you just keep forcing more and more and more from me. why arent i ever good enough? i try and try but there's always something wrong. something's always WRONG.
WRONG WRONG WRONG.
FUCK.
i love you still...
-d
The interview went really well. It's bizarre how charismatic I can be when I apply myself. I'm still nervous though. The job would be absolutely perfect for me and I'd finally be able to not be a NEET. I'd finally be able to move out, fix my car up and not frustrate my parents.
God, I'm going to be watching my emails and phone like a hawk. Please, please, please let me land this.
>>17033321
Dick
I ache in my chest when I think about you. I don't know what to do, I don't know how to move forward. I'm glad I saw you there the other night. I'm glad we talked a bit. You asked after my fingers, and I was surprised you even remembered the stitches I had.
Does it mean anything? Does it even matter? I'm alright, I just keep thinking of you... So often it's as though I knew you in another life. Ah...help...
