I need some advice on getting out of going to the wedding. I don't really like this friend of 20 years so not going his wedding will fuck up other friendships.
My friend just announced that he's getting married. A date has not been set yet, but I'm assuming it's going to be spring 2017.
I've known my friend for 20 years. I never really liked him, but somehow the fucker is always in my life.
When I tell him I'm not going he is going to flip the fuck out.
Help me get out of going to this wedding anons by suggesting some excuses
Stick your hand in a woodchipper a week before the wedding.
Well your options are either fuck up your friendships with the others, or suck it up and go to the wedding. It'll only be a morning or afternoon of your life
You stuck with this guy for 20 years when you never really liked him?
I'm sorry, OP, but you're out of choices. Unless you're in the hospital, the courthouse, or the morgue, you have to go. Consider it one last duty to a dying friendship.
>>16996380
Take him hunting (or a shooting ring) for a bachelors party and "accidentally" shoot yourself in the foot. Problem solved
>>16996387
kek this
If you know any sick people, like people with the cold, whatever, hang around them a lot. Before the wedding, hopefully you get sick, then go to the doctor. They'll give you medicine and shit, but don't take it, and get even worse, then on the day of the wedding, just look like a total wreck and that should work.
If you never liked him then why call him your friend?
Go to the wedding you fag