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I just feel like I can't do it anymore, /adv/ I hate to

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I just feel like I can't do it anymore, /adv/

I hate to be another one of those suicidal threads but nothing seems worth it and my Pure-O OCD is controlling my whole life. I'm on 100mg of Zoloft and go to therapy but it's still there and it never goes away

When I was 13 I was coerced by a 20 year old online to make child pornography of myself by manipulating me with compliments and it's ruined my ability to be intimate forever and I have vaginismus but my boyfriend needs sex in his life so much that I feel like he'll never be happy with me and we won't last

Everyone leaves me the moment I do one thing wrong and even now someone I thought was a good friend of mine seems to be talking about how the only reason they're not breaking it off with me is because they'd feel bad because I recently bought them an expensive gift

The only thing keeping me going is I love my family and I don't want them to be sad

I don't think my life is going to go anywhere, I have a job and I go to university but I still feel worthless

I just want to start over and be okay but that's impossible, so how does life get better when nothing goes right, /adv/
>>
>The only thing keeping me going is I love my family and I don't want them to be sad
Me, too!
It takes a lot to maintain some semblance of control in front of others, but we do it because we don't want to hurt them, even if we hurt.
I am sorry you had bad experience when young. Wish I could hug now. You need a good hug.
When I feel bad, I thin how thankful I am. Life could be a lot horrible, but, even if the hurt never stop, we can keep going! People are like wind, one come and one goes away. You remain
>>
please tell me you're seeing a psychiatrist for your obvious psychiatric issues.
>>
>>16891986
I am but I've only been able to open up about the more serious stuff a few times

Mostly I just talk about how I have online checking-up on people who hate me issues from my OCD
>>
>>16891922
>manipulated

You're just a slut
>>
>>16892001
Don't be an insensitive prick. Obviously OP is troubled by this. Fuck she was 13.
>>
>>16892835
You're saying it like its an excuse

If you killed someone at 13 they would try you as an adult. At 13 you have the capacity to not be a stupid slut on the internet. I'm not going to give a grown up slut sympathy when it was her choice.
Thread replies: 7
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