Self-validation
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You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice
You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice
I have an unhealthy tendency to seek validation with others, which has landed me in damaging relationships more times than I can count.
I just cut contact with a girl who more or less used me like a surrogate boyfriend. After initially telling me she wasn't interested in dating me, she begged me to stay friends with her and said she didn't want to lose me, so that got me to stick around. Turns out it was mostly because she didn't really have any other friends at the time and once she got her social life back together, I was a non-entity to her.
I decided she wasn't worth the love I came to feel for her. That I deserved way better than how she treated me. I just want to make sure this never happens again. I gotta learn how not to need anyone else like that. I never want to fall for anything like what happened with us again. Not ever.
How do I focus inward and build that self-validation?
You don't do jackshit. You learn from your experience and avoid the same mistake. Also you fill your life with content. Something that keeps you interested and what makes you an interesting person.
