If you were a booger, I'd pick you first.
How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the ice; hi I'm [anon]
Whale hello, it's dolphinitely nice to meet you!
If I had to guess, I bet your phone number is 3. Oh it's not? Well what is it then?

That's all I've got. With some conversation finesse I've actually been kind of successful with these.

you sit in a pile of sugar cuz you got a pretty sweet ass

Do you work at Subway? Because you give me a footlong.

>>16467791
wow

just wow

>Whale hello, it's dolphinitely nice to meet you!
I can imagine having to try and not say this. Although I guess the fat connotation ruins it.

Are you sitting on your F5 key? Because that ass is refreshing.

>>16467788
"Would you care to join me for a Wormdo?"
"What's a Wormdo?"
"It crawls along the ground like this" *makes crawling motion with finger*.

>>16467851
That only works if you use the mesmerstare

>>16467834
for context I used this while making a stupid voice for a stuffed whale.

>>16467847
10/10

Small talk to girl about anything at place where you wait for sht, whether its a line or a station or sht. If she seemd to like talking to you and when the time approaches the wait ends:
>Hey, uhh, I dont usually do this but, could I have your FB (or skype or phone or email or anything), it was fun to talk to you and I dont really like the idea of not talking to you again, so...
>oh shit, cant remember what I said exactly
Anyway, got meself a gril for 4 years this way.

>>16467788
>wow, you have this super cute shiny smile
(to a girl with braces)

Do you want a receipt?
>only if your number's on it!
to a cassiere

>damn you look so cute, I'd actually leave my phone in my pocket whilst talking to you!

>you've been practicing that smile haven't you?

>your dance just makes me happy

>Have we met before ?
>Her: No, I dont think so
>Yup, thats where I know you from
>Her: Where ?
>My dreams

>Is your name google ?
>Because you're everything Im searching for

>Do you know anything about phones ?
>Something is wrong with mine..
>Her: What wrong with it ?
>Your numbers not in it

>Can I follow you home ?
>My parents always told me to follow my dreams

>Did it hurt ?
>Her: Did what hurt ?
>When you fell from heaven, did it hurt ?

>Theres something on the back of your neck
>Pretend to have a look
>Yup, just as a thought. Made in heaven.

>>16467788
Can I sage your thread? I need you to go down on me.