Is it true that Greek mythology was far more lighthearted than modern readers interpret?
I think you got the wrong board, OP
Ulysses arc is best arc.
>>140485187
No. People were just far less thin-skinned than today
>>140485187
Yes, they created ye olde yaoi and practiced openly gay sex.
>>140485326
I get this joke, its very fitting.
Ancient Greece was god tier. Literally the epoch of civilization, intelligence wise. The amount of 10/10 characters you could put into that kind of a setting is insane.
>>140485187
Sure, if you don't mind rape.
Lots and lots of rape.
>>140485551
t. romecuck
how's the leaded water taste faggot
>we told Heracles to impregnate the entire island of women, and he actually did! The absolute madman
>>140485569
But I do mind rape. And so did the Greeks.
>>140485551
This! The middle ages ruined everything with their moe moe germanic tribes.
Greek gods were the comic book heroes of their time.
They may have godly powers, but they had human emotions and failings, which is why they were so popular.
can confirm, am greekfag
>>140486955
Why are you posting this worthless facebook-tier shit?
>>140487153
because i always giggle when i read it and it's pretty much true.
>>140487327
I liked it too, anon.
Wrong board
Please delete, mods
>he didn't read the source texts
EOP please go
>>140485187
yes
maybe
I don't know
>>140487430
Sad. It had potential.
>>140487895
Can you repeat the question?
>>140485187
Why is this in /a/?
>>140485187
Only in the sense that 9 out of every 10 Terrible Things in Greek tragedy happen because Zeus can't keep it in his toga.
>>140485326
>>140487430
Greek novels are the precursors of light novels, though
>>140488816
His chiton. Togas are Roman.
>>140488816
The other times was when Zeus or another god got pissy about someone not worshiping them enough. Or another god couldn't not go a-raping.
Case in point: according to one legend, the first Athenians were created when Hephaestus got tired of Aphrodite making eyes at Ares and tried to rape Athena. he chased her while jerking it and when he came, some hit her leg, fell off and became humans who founded Athens.
Or the time Athena made Medusa into a gorgon after she got raped by Poseidon in Athena's temple and prayed to never have that happen again.
When the Japanese were still living in caves, the Greeks were already creating dickgirls.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hermaphroditus
>>140490530
Hermaphroditus wasn't a dickgirl, he was a boy that was so beautiful a water nymph fell in love with him and fused onto his body, giving him all genitalia.
>>140490588
Hermaphroditus ended up with the body of a girl along with a dick though.
>>140490588
So a futa?
>>140489622
Well, Medusa didn't get raped again. Mission accomplished.
>>140489224
But Zeus is never depicted wearing a chiton, it's clearly a toga.
>>140490530
When moot was still but a glimmer in someone's eye, the Romans were already shitposting.
http://www.pompeiana.org/Resources/Ancient/Graffiti%20from%20Pompeii.htm
>>140490728
In the Renaissance era sculptures and paintings? It makes sense that Italian artists would put him in a toga. It's the same principle that makes everyone paint Jesus as white.
Some legends would make for great porn. Like turning "judgement of Paris" into one were Paris decides the best goddesses is the one who can fuck the best.
One day soon, I will make a Latin translation to some anime. I don't know what yet, but the day is coming
>>140491089
>There will never be doujins about the gods rape escapades
>>140485187
>Lighthearted
>A man loses his wife on their wedding day.
>He sings and play songs to the point he manages to get her back from the underworld, but on the condition he must walk in front of her, without looking back until they are outside.
>He fails to do that at the very last moment.
>Gets killed by carpet-munchers.
>But his head is alive and still singing.
>His father, one of the Endless, decides to take the ultimate punishment as long as his son can finally rest
>His tale is interpreted as an act of cowardice later on.
Orpheus had a hard life
>Hamlet was a GOAT masterpiece
>Writes "Taming of the Shrew" to pander to tsundere-fags
Fucking sell-out
>>140491298
Dream was a cool nigga, RiP.
>>140485187
Oedipus Tyrannus is really fucking intense.
>>140491298
I like the Izanagi story better, he sees his waifu half-rotten and eaten by maggots and runs away kicking and screaming.
>>140491269
>Tachibana-san's Circumstances with a God
>>140488910
>The godesses asked me who's the prettiest and now my girlfriend is Menelaus' wife!?
Then it turns out that Japan was founded by the same antediluvian iron age tribe that founded the Greek civilizations, which accounts for why many Japanese legends often have the same motifs and structure as western ones instead than oriental.
>>140491416
When you imagine that Jocasta manages a Gunpla shop, Eddy-kun suddenly seems like a whiny little moralfag who can't enjoy a good thing for what it's worth
>>140490747
>I.2.20 (Bar/Brothel of Innulus and Papilio); 3932: Weep, you girls. My penis has given you up. Now it penetrates men’s behinds. Goodbye, wondrous femininity!
>>140491339
Shakespeare was an otaku pandering faggot all the way back when he wrote a Midsummers Night's Dream. No way a hot fairy babe would jump on a loser's dick that quickly.
>>140487153
Blacks on Instagram are now the number one source of internet memes.
>>140485551
Shut up, homotroklos
Go back to sucking little boy dicks
>>140491758
See, I can handle male power fantasies (in small doses); I actually enjoyed Macbeth until season 2 when he became an edgelord. What I can't stand is making the heroine the worst archetype of girl
>>140490747
VI.14.36 (Bar of Salvius); 3494: In one bar, a picture depicts two men playing dice. One shouts, “Six!” while his opponent holds up two fingers and says, “No, that’s not a ‘three’; it’s a ‘two’”. By the door of the bar, another picture shows a short man driving a group of men out. Above his head are the words, “Go on, get out of here! You have been fighting!”
fucking dubs threads
Friendly reminder that the Greeks had waifus before it was cool.
>>140493115
>>140493115
Even cavemen drew waifus on cave's walls.
>>140493153
Dubs, waifus, futas, traps, why were thr greeks and romans so /a/?
>>140492872
Fucker made the same mistake in King Lear. I mean, I wonder who the heroine is, the pure maiden or the two evil sluts?
That said Edmund vs Edgar was a brilliant conclusion to the arc. I was hyped as shit when he revealed his true power level.
>>140493206
Don't forget fucking shotas in the ass.
>>140490747
Came here to post this. I have buggered men.
>>140486955
its funny because its true
>>140493206
they were ahead of their time
>>140489622
Why was Athena such a grade-A cunt?
>>140493493
It's hard being a good woman when your husband sleeps around a lot.
>>140485187
this is now a Historie thread
>>140493206
You forget incest.
>>140493526
Your talking about Hera
>>140493633
And your shounen battles
>>140493654
Oh yeah.
>>140493526
Yeah no, Athena is permavirgin status like Artemis.
>>140493733
>muh pure warrior waifu
Fucking Saberfags, jesus christ.
>>140493115
>When you hotglue your figma so much it becomes alive
>>140493190
This is a Greek myth. I feel like the ending should have been more horrific.
IX.8.3 (House of the Centenary; interior of the house); 5279: Once you are dead, you are nothing
>>140493947
TRUE LOVE ALWAYS FINDS A WAY
>>140485187
Athena is best girl.
>>140488769
Because Greek mythology is basically an LN plotline.
>>140485187
Absolutely. You know how you mess with your friends about sucking their dicks & all that shit. Sometimes in the shower you smack their butts a little with the towel. Maybe you'll play lights out in the military - you know that game where you turn off the lights and grab a dude's dick and then turn the lights back on and then you have to figure out whose dick you grabbed. But you aren't really gay it's just funny to talk like a fag. Well the Greeks were just like that. They would have fun pretending to be gay with each other, but it just so happens that stories and concepts were passed down in stone and word of mouth. Therefore the sarcasm was a little hard to pick up on. That's why people think Greeks are a bunch of faggots, but it's really just dudes like you and me who pretend to be gay for laughs.
>>140494232
>I Can't Believe My Husband Cheated On Me By Transforming Himself On A Bull And Now His Son Is A Half Human Half Bull Monster?!
>>140494488
uh the bull was so sexy that she had Daedalus make a cow suit for her to get fucked by the bull
>>140493206
>>140493633
>>140493661
The Nemean Lion arc is my favorite in the whole Twelve Labours of Heracles.
He gets that bitching mane, and you would think he would get overpowered because of the impenetrable skin but the way he must tackle the other jobs go around that.
Truly, you can appreciate the blooming writing abilities in this early work fromHirohiko Araki
>>140494433
>they frotted with teenagers
>one of the few remnants of their civilization are statues of twinks
Ancient Greeks just sound like good bros, not gay at all.
So if Greco-Roman mythology=anime and manga, does Germanic mythology=manhwa and Korean dramas?
>>140493992
t. Emius Shirous
>>140493992
Floronius may be dead, but he's not nothing. He buggered six women at once. RIP in peace you privileged soldier of the 7th legion.
>>140491339
>Hamlet GOAT
>he hasn't read King Lear
Lear was some real nigga shit. Hamlet is literally about a whiny kid that can't fit in the Machiavellian world of politics. Lear loses his mind and loses the only person in the world that truly loved him.
Also, all cuckfags should read Othello.
>>140494657
And early Middle age transcriptions = Duwang
>>140494047
god tier: Hestia
great tier: Demeter
okay tier: Artemis, Athena
shit tier: Aphrodite, Hera
>>140494837
>Hestia
>anything but shit tier
>>140494837
>Hestia
>Oh, I'll give up my throne to that new kid Hermes
>I'll just sit over here by the fire.
>By myself.
>forever alone virgin
ONE OF US.
>>140494837
Have you tried with shotas? With such shit taste is obvious you aren't interested in women
Hermes best boy.
>>140494897
Hestia is the perfect waifu you pleb
number of times hestia turned a mortal woman into some monster out of jealousy:0
number of times Hestia killed some dude who happened to catch her bathing:0
>>140494958
Didn't she give the seat up to Dionysus?
>off topic thread up for 4 hours
Nice job mods
What a shit, unfunny thread.
>>140495148
>not knowing cl/a/ssics threads
step it up senpai
>>140494047
>human girl gets good at sewing
>Athena is goddess of textiles
>girl says Athena ain't shit and her father is a manwhore
>Athena challenges girl to duel
>Athena gets her shit royally pushed
>gets mad and turn girl into spider
Your greek goddess waifu a shit!
Did the Greek have virgin mothers?
Or was that a Christian original?
>>140495024
>Hermes.
>Not Ares.
Get your shit straight, son.
>>140495248
>implying anybody liked Ares
That guy is a fag who thought he was tough but then goes crying to daddy when he gets a paper cut.
>>140490747
People never change
>>140495246
>Did the Greek have virgin mothers?
Not with Zeus around they didn't.
The closest though would probably be Hephaestus who Hera spawn out of jealousy
>>140495246
dionysus was gestated by being sewn into zeus' leg cause his mom got disintegrated
that's sort of the opposite, I guess.
>>140495248
This >>140495358
Aries was a bitch that liked to bully humans.
>>140495236
worth it
Any egyptian bros here?
They shitposted on walls before it was cool.
Let's try and make myths from the Metamorphoses into LN titles.
>I chased after my nymph but she turned into a tree!?
>>140494047
Athena is an envious ugly cunt.
Kill yourself.
>>140495515
>Boku no Ganymede
>>140494655
What is the Eva of Greek Epics?
>>140495515
>I was peed on while in a cage and then got pregnant with a son
>>140490530
They were also making Waifus real:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pygmalion_(mythology)
And they had great taste in Monster Girls.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Centaurides
>How beautiful the Centaurides are, even where they are horses; for some grow out of white mares, others are attached to chestnut mares, and the coats of others are dappled, but they glisten like those of horses that are well cared for. There is also a white female Centaur that grows out of a black mare, and the very opposition of the colours helps to produce the united beauty of the whole
>t. Philostratus
>>140497436
Greeks and Romans had fetishes for everything. Even statues, but I can't find the link
>>140485187
Yes
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c26Af95bmik
>>140498894
>ThatAnimeSnob
Dropped.
>>140485326
My sides
They say Hercules fucked a lamia in a cave and fathered the entire scythian nation
>>140499412
So furry bangers were descended from Hercules huh. Where's Hera when you need her?
>>140490747
Floronius, privileged soldier of the 7th legion, was here. The women did not know of his presence. Only six women came to know, too few for such a stallion.
>>140485758
>Zeus, Apollo, Serene, Poseidon are gods who raped people.
>Zeus has raped enough to be incarcerated for all eternity
>Everyone in Greece viewed it as something great
They mind it alright. They think it was great.
>>140485613
>t. romecuck
Fuck off /int/.
You know, I still expect most of these threads to devolve into bathroom shitposting.
Is the Iliad the LOGH of Greek epics?
Reminder that Muhammad, the prophet of the most popular religion in the world, was into loli
>>140503828
>most popular religion in the world
Islam is hated by everyone who isn't a mudskin.
>>140504004
By popular, I meant the one with the most followers, which it sadly is
>>140503799
Indeed, but substituting cheap politics with masculinity.
>>140494837
>Athena
>not God tier
She literally was the most supporting goddess in both Illiad and Odyssey, which are literally the two greatest novels about greek mythology ever. Also, she is pure, she never scored. You dislike Athena because she is manlier than you.
>>140504028
ayy
https://www.cia.gov/library/publications/the-world-factbook/geos/xx.html
>>140504098
>Athena transforms into Mentor, an old guy
>is absolutely bro-tier
>acts warlike
Is Athenatrans-male?
>>140504158
Cool, I thought I read otherwise somewhere but that's good news
>>140499742
probably geting cuckd by her husband
>>140504164
She can be whatever you want, but she won't bang you.
>>140504332
>tfw no Telemachus-Athena /ss/ doujins
Well at least we get Odysseus sweet talking Nausicaa
>>140504394
Telemachus was already too old by the time
>>140504441
Oh right, he was of age to fight, wasn't he? My mistake.
>tfw no Telemachus-Athena Christmas Cake doujin
>mfw there are people here who haven't read Thermae Romae
>>140504158
>muslim not first
That racis'
>age structure
>0-14 years: 25,64%
Noice.
>>140493206
Some things never change
>>140493153
>>140493190
I actually expected Aphrodite to turn Pygmalion into stone so he could be with his waifu. Guess that despite being a slut and kicking off the Trojan Wars, Aphrodite was pretty nice.
>>140505352
Sluts in general are nice people, you just don't want to have a relationship with them.
>>140491641
Gaius & Aulus needs to be a SoL show
>>140490747
>Chie, I hope your hemorrhoids rub together so much that they hurt worse than when they every have before!
wow
>>140504581
I read it, anon..
I'm here for you <3
-emperor Hadrian
>>140493190
I never expected Aphrodite to be this bro tier
>>140504098
The Iliad and Odyssey aren't novels, you know.
Religious rituals are much more interesting than the myths themselves. The Romans knew this and that's why no indigenous Roman myths (which comparative mythology indicates are as different from Greek and Etruscan ones as the Greek ones are from the Vedic) survive in anything but euhemerized form.
>>140507976
The Greek gods were very human, which is why they were capable of both great deeds and great atrocities depending on which side of the bed they woke up that day.
>>140494837
>Aphrodite
>shit tier
>literally brought a guy's waifu to life
>shit tier
>>140508128
She cucked her husband though.
>>140490747
ROMA
O
M
A
Also
>Two friends were here. While they were, they had bad service in every way from a guy named Epaphroditus. They threw him out and spent 105 and half sestertii most agreeably on whores.
>>140490747
>that one guy shitting in front of everyone's houses
>>140504581
It was an entertaining read. It's obvious it wasn't suppose to be longer, but the romance with the romaboo wasn't that bad.
Also Tommy Lee Jones best grandpa.
>VIII.2 (in the basilica); 1881: Virgula to her friend Tertius: you are disgusting!
b-baka...
>>140505352
The gods are fickle and easily angered, but they are generally OK folks otherwise. Ares and Hekate are edgelords, though, and Eris is just a bitch.
>>140505546
Poor Hephaestus.
>>140508128
>Literally made Medusa a monster cause people liked her hair better
She's a cunt m8
>this entire thread
Every greek deity except Hades and those associated with his realm A SHIT.
>>140490747
>V.5 (just outside the Vesuvius gate); 6641: Defecator, may everything turn out okay so that you can leave this place
>literally "shitposter pls leave"
>>140485187
Greek tragedy.
Hera was actually a good woman, she was just cold towards people.
It's true that most people think ancient Greek comedies are stuffy and/or dated, until they look up Aristophanes and see all those fap jokes.
>>140493493
All the gods were.
>>140485187
Which one is your favorite hero?
>>140485187
>starting a self-proclaimed-historian thread
This is not anime. And underage will love it, so congratulations on your first 500-post thread.
>>140490747
>VIII.2 (in the basilica); 1811: A small problem gets larger if you ignore it.
What did he mean by this?
>>140513895
Odysseus, although Jason is a fun parody of how a Greek hero should be.
>>140485187
Not a Greek myth, but I'd fucking pay for an anime adaptation of Lysistrata.
That shit would be hilarious. Like that scene where they are dividing up the territories by using a naked woman's body as the map.
>>140514150
>implying underage appreciate the Greeks in the first place
Just because you failed school out of disinterest for this shit, doesn't mean you have justification for projecting anon.
>>140514345
That you must catch up with your backlog before it grows bigger
>>140512288
Plautus jokes are also pretty funny
>>140514733
Truly ahead of their times
>>140490747
>I.2.23 (peristyle of the Tavern of Verecundus); 3951: Restitutus says: “Restituta, take off your tunic, please, and show us your hairy privates”.
>literally Tits or GTFO
4chan is a recreation of pompeii through and through.Vesuvius eruption when
>>140490747
>VII.6.35 (Brothel of Venus; on the Vico dei Soprastanti opposite the Vicolo del Gallo); 1645: May Love burn in some lonely mountains whoever wants to rape my girl friend!
NTR was a roman invention indeed.
>>140488910
It's so fucking true.
I can't take the Classics seriously any more. I just imagine the characters speaking like my chinese cartoon protagonists and it fucking fits so well.
Heck, you could probably interpret plenty of jokes as greentext.
>>140508595
She's the greek goddess of love. Just what did he expect when he married her?
>>140512180
Hera is the goddess of marriage. She is married to Zeus. I think it's fair to say she had very credible reasons to be acting cold to everyone.
Odysseus > agamemnon > ajax >>>> Achilles
>>140516879
I'm in rage right now!
>>140516879
>agamemnon
Really? Guy was a bit of an asshole (not that the others aren't), and he did die a somewhat embarrassing death at the hands of his wife and her new boytoy.
>>140500977
It was only a crime if a god tried to rape another god. Human's don't count. They are like objects to gods, sex objects.
>>140516879
>not wearing proper feet protecion
Achilles was a fucking retard. Same as his mother for leaving the heel out.
>>140517081
He's better then those other two
>Achilles gets pussy when ever things aren't his way and hides in his tent like a bitch
>ajax fucking kills himself over not getting Achilles' armour when he died
>>140517322
>gets pussy
Fuck meant gets pissy
>>140517322
True, you make a really good point there, so I'll concede that to you.
>You took my prize women Agamemnon you dick! I'm not going to bother fighting anymore!
>Okay, I'm willing to give her back if you get back to fighting.
>No, I don't want her anymore, go away!
Achilles was a pretty whiny bitch.
>>140495148
>off topic
Whatever do you mean? It's just another Gate thread.
>>140485187
Yes. Every single historical period is always blown way out of proportion in modern media.
>>140517081
I'ma let you finish though. But I just wanted to say, as a person who was there, I can speak on behalf that he was, quite literally, a dick and Calchas was a fucken paedo who didn't get it on so, like, he decided to make up this whole no wind excuse, just to kill one little girl. But then out of fucken no where this ALIEN CHICK CAME DOWN FROM THE FUCKEN SKY AND WOW!!!!! And then SHE WOW!!! Like WOW! Bow and arrow of fire!!! OF FUCKEN FIRE!|
Ancient aliens now, bad neighbours back then.
>hades
>makes promises
>treats everyone fairly
>only sees his wife in the winter
>seen as the devil
>zeus
>rapes everyone
>cheats on his wife all the time
>shapeshifts to rape even more people
>seen as god
It's no fair.
>>140516879
Agamemnon was pretty bad. Not an exceptional warrior but very arrogant, self-centered and a terrible leader. Ajax was a very powerful warrior but he wasn't very bright.
Achilles may have had anger management issues, but he wasn't so bad.
>>140517081
Agamemnon just had shit luck with girls. Other than that he's a good dude.
>>140502582
You called?
>>140517549
Right? Hades get so much shit even though he is the fucking nicest God around. Aside from that Persephone shit, but even then that is implied to be a happy marriage in comparison to all the other cluster fucks.
>Be Herakles
>Gods giving you shit when you just want to get these 12 labors done
>have to get the God of the Underworld's pet for one of them
>oh shit
>goes to the Underworld and asks Hades for permission
>expect to get fucked over
>Hades just says sure, on the condition that he brings him back after he is done
Seriously, Hades is Best God by fucking miles.
>>140517549
Zeus never kidnapped a woman and forced her to marry him.
>>140511130
>Eris is just a bitch.
>all the normie gods are having a huge party
>don't send you you and invitation
>send a golden apple to the party
>write on it "For the hottest chick"
>All the Stacys in Olympus start narturally start fight over it
Don't be too hard on her Eris is just the Greek Tomoko
>>140495515
>Is it wrong to pick up girls in the underworld?
>>140517577
>self centered
>compared to those other two
Dude was chill, he just wanted revenge on troy due to them not letting him personally settle things with paris who stole his wife
>>140517677
>forced her to marry him
Pretty debatable, some interpretations actually make the marriage itself mutual, and it's just Demeter getting pissed off than anything else.
>>140517549
>only sees his wife in the winter
Slight correction, it's actually summer. Greek Summers are pretty harsh and their Winters were pretty normal weather. Hence why Demeter created summer in retaliation whenever Persephone was with Hades.
>>140517677
Yeah, he just forcefully raped everyone arbitrarily. That's... better?
>>140517752
>paris who stole his wife
I kind of feel bad for Paris though, even if he was kind of a selfish and cowardly twat.
I mean the war started because the gods were whiny bitches about a contest they brought to him.
>>140517677
Worst, he never went around holding hands.
This might come as a shock to you but women in ancient greece were not meant to hold hands around, even with goddess. That's just...unnatural.
>>140517752
You're thinking of Menelaus, Agamemnon was married to Clytemnestra not Helen.
>>140517677
Zeus took Ganymede from his family to be his cupbearer (read as fuccboi)
>>140517823
The war actually started because the Olympians pissed off the goddess of NEETs
>>140490747
>VIII.2 (in the basilica); 1812: Caesius faithfully loves M[…name lost]
Who won the Caesiusb owl?
>>140485187
This is often true with old stuff. For some reason, when stuff is old you have to pretend that it's ultra-heavy dead-serious shit. Hence people sitting on chairs listening to an orchestra performing... dance music. Sigh.
>>140511651
Hades had it hard.
>Get the worst realm
>Did his job and stayed there most of the time
>Found waifu
>Kidnap her
>Her mom gets mad
>Make a deal to return her for half the year
>>140517910
>hades posts about his princess waif
>zeus won't shut up about boypussy and feminine dick
>>140518010
Huh, I always thought it was because everyone got pissed when he took that one guys wife away (since she was the prize for the contest or something along those lines). Though I could be getting my stories mixed up.
>>140517878
>be greek king
>away at war for years
>come home
>your wife is fucking you uncle
>she goes Higarashi on you as soon as you get back
being Agamemnon is suffering
>>140518047
>Sigh.
Fuck off.
>>140518076
It's alright though. Hera fucks him too.
>>140518100
That's the human side of the story.
Homer's shit usually has a lot of duopoly
But you are mostly right.
>Eris throws the apple
>goddess start fight over who is prettier
>some decides to ask Paris
>Slut goddess offers Paris any girl he wants
>He chooses Helen
>All of Helen's former suitors are obligated to help get her back
>>140518118
Don't forget Cassandra.
>get blessed by Apollo with the gift of foresight
>also because he is an ass he makes it so that no one believes you
>winds up as the prize for greek king
>ends up at his home, with him saying the people there should treat her well
>wife is obviously going to kill him, and her because she is a jealous murderous bitch
>states the obvious to everyone there
>"nah, what are you saying!"
>just goes ahead and let yourself be killed because fuck everybody.
>>140485187
That's because the translators used flowery language. Just imagine, thousands of years from now, where nations collapse and languages become lost, so anime becomes one of the pillars of "high culture" because scholars take japanese and turn it into shit like
YUI: Forsooth, leisure is leisure!
ITT: Characters that are literally you
>>140518076
Just like /a/!
>>140518275
And she gets away with.
She was so hot, so legend tells, that a mere gaze of her could turn straight women gay. With her god like gaze and smirk.
Man. That's one hell of a power.
>>140517549
>Is actually the oldest
>But is considered the youngest and got the shittiest realm because he got out of his daddy's stomach last
Hades and his suffering
>>140518118
>has to sacrifice his daughter because Artemis throws a bitchfit
>has to return Chryseis to her dad
>wife murders him and his concubine
3DPD women, not even once.
>>140518282
>>also because he is an ass he makes it so that no one believes you
Apollo is a dick and a coward, this is made very apparent in The Eumenides.
Hell, Apollo is the more or less the precursor to /r9k/'s "Chad"
>>140518323
>hades is tomoko
>zeus is umaru
>>140518485
Speaking of the main trio, I'm surprised that there hasn't been much on Poseidon's dickery yet.
>>140518311
>you are literally Nobody
;_;
>>140518370
>She was so hot, so legend tells, that a mere gaze of her could turn straight women gay.
What? Helen? The Helen of Troy?
By the way, how many of you have seen Plebs?
Not mythology, but I still think you'll like it.
>>140518508
>sister gets touchy feely with a guy
>better send a giant scorpion to kill him
>hey sis,bet you can't shoot that swimming thing
>shit,he became stars
>better make the scorpion stars too
>>140518539
He is always overlooked thanks to Zeus being a more notorious jerk and Hades being a bro
There's some real quality here, we should have a monthly cultural thread
>>140518539
I think Lucian wrote a satire about how Poseidon laughed at polynisus after he got his eye poked out by Odysseus. Shit was funny
>>140490747
>VIII.2 (in the basilica); 1824: Let everyone one in love come and see. I want to break Venus’ ribs with clubs and cripple the goddess’ loins. If she can strike through my soft chest, then why can’t I smash her head with a club?
>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>140518275
Paris had it tough honestly, he really didn't have a choice. Even if he picked Hera or Athena the other two will try to fuck him up in their own ways.
>>140518539
>be Poseidon
>fuck with a guy because he blinded your douchebag son
People saying Hades was a bro. Hades was like fucking Cthulu and Eldtritch abomination kind of guy. He may have been a good guy but he didn't look alluring. I mean, the guy of the undead and with monster and dark souls kinda of vibe. You just don't go to god meeting and talk about your sex live with a god that is just probably tentacles and horror things.
>>140518880
forgot my image
>>140518830
Do you mean Lucilius?
>>140518673
>hot imouto gets peeped on in the bath
>guy get a nosebleed
>she gender-swaps him as punishment
It's like something out of Tu Love Ru
>>140518813
Begone Generalfagius, screwer of men.
>>140485187
Nope. For today's standards it's pretty much dark, depressing and with large body counts. On the other hand there were multiple versions of the same myth, so even these ranged from depressing to bittersweet. And even less of them had something of a happy ending.
And the best part? The least dickish Greek God was Hades because a) he sat almost the whole time in the Underworld and b) wasn't interested in mortal affairs all the time (or to be precise: the least barring some exceptions).
Roman versions are more lighthearted instead.
>>140518900
You can be spooky and still be a bro.
>>140518694
And that's why all that buttfuckery happens in Age of Mythology.
Poor Arkantos...
>>140518830
That's the True History writer,right?
https://lucianofsamosata.info/downloads/lucian_true_history.pdf
>>140518311
bu..but that's laocoon
>>140518968
Could have been worse, could have gotten turned into a deer, hunted and devoured by dogs.
>>140519003
No one is questioning that. But the thing is, the scariest god turned out to be the most kind and faithful.
WAIFU ALREADY CLAIMED
SORRY FOLKS
>>140519054
Or even worse, raped by Zeus.
Seriously that nigga will stick his dick in anything and anyone.
>>140518950
Found it
http://www.theoi.com/Text/LucianDialoguesGods2.html
>>140519032
Yup
>>140519028
>Age of Mythology
That game was so good.PROSTAGMA?
But seriously, Arkantos would be an OP Lancer class in Fate after what happened to him at the end of the final mission.
>>140518900
>cthulu
Its cthulhu, I don't get why people have such a hard time remembering the h
>>140519003
>>140519100
I always wondered about that, since the Greeks very much had the "beauty = good" and "ugly = evil" theme going. It was a bit weird seeing how Hades is portrayed as the kindest.
Same goes for a lot of those associated with the underworld. Charon and others were usually just doing their jobs in contrast to the peons of the other gods.
>>140494047
Damn right.
>>14048518
>You just don't go to god meeting and talk about your sex live with a god that is just probably tentacles and horror things.
Well, you never know. Maybe Persephone is into that kind of shit after spending enough time with him.
>Greeks never talked much about Hades because they were scared of him
>>140519032
>plant girls capturing people who try to fuck them
A few pages in,and still just like my japanese manga.
>>140519181
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dmtW0EzA0yE
VRITOMOS?
>>140519311
Once in the realm of the dead even gods get humble+modern morality making people see figures from old stories in a different light.
Athena
Artemis
Aphodite
The three As of GAAAY.
Hephaestus created robotic sluts for his own pleasure
one of us
>>140519355
Which is funny because they had to find a backhanded method of praying to him when they wanted wealth. Since he was the god in charge of that.
So they went so far as to come up with another name for him to pray to.
>>140516879
Hektor > Odysseus > Diomedes > Achilles > Ajas > Agamemnon
>>140519181
>Titans expansion pack is released
>His son grows up to be a gullible retard that almost ruins everything
>>140519487
VULOME.
>>140519544
artemis would kill you for even watching her shoulder
>>140519552
Well when you're stuck with a cheating slut of a wife you gotta do with it somehow.
>>140519667
To be fair, he wasn't there to raise him right.
>Heracles asked Hades for Cerberus, and Hades told Heracles he would allow him to take Cerberus only if he "mastered him without the use of the weapons which he carried", and so, using his lion-skin as shield, Heracles squeezed Cerberus around the head until he submitted
Hades was bro, he didn't want Heracles to hurt Cerberus with his weapons.
>>140485326
o my fucking god, that plato oke, my sides
>>140519736
who is also his sister
>>140519728
She turned a boy into a maiden after he watched her bath, no, not the other who was turned into a stag and killed by his own dogs, just a kid who got turned into a chick.
If that was not enough bad luck, the boy now turned girl was taken captive by Aunty Artemis and explained why men a icky and disgusting.
>>140517440
Achilles was a tucjing pussy with no standing to say nothing in that war. After the Iphigenia shit on argos, he had the balls to actually claim a woman, tucking sissy.
>>140519825
Just like my genderbender WNs.
>>140518539
We read Ovid in school, and he tells a story of Iupiter = Zeus working together with Neptunus = Poseidon to kill off humanity. According to Ovid, Zeus first tried it on its own with lightning strikes, but he stopped before everyone was dead because he feared all creation might catch fire. So he worked together with Poseidon to finish the job with one big flood. They were pretty thorough, there were only two survivors. – Ov. Met. 1.318
>>140519825
this is why jap should make more hentai around greek mythology
don't get me started with that milf of Hera
>>140517687
I prefer KonoSuba's Eris to her.Even if they are the same goddess.
>>140519544
Two of those are permavirgins, the other is really really bi-sexual.
>>140519138
Zeus has fucked
>his aunts
>his older sister
>mortal women
>his own daughter
>his brother's wife who also happens to be daughter
>mortal men
>other goddess
>nymphs
Zeus is a "Your mouth is saying no, but your body is saying yes" kinda guy.
>>140519311
>t was a bit weird seeing how Hades is portrayed as the kindest.
Hades was alright insofar as you could at least expect him to stick to his side of the playground. He's portrayed as jealous, stern, greedy, possessive, deceptive, cruel, and so on. He mostly comes off as better than his fellow Olympians because there's far less written about him, and one of the reasons why there's so little written about him is because the Greeks generally wanted to associate with him as little as possible. They even made up titles for him just to avoid speaking his name. He shows maybe one or two positive character traits throughout Greek myth, and those would be that he at least shows some degree of respect for his wife's wishes and that he unlike his siblings at least doesn't meddle in the affairs of others all that much. Unless your name was Heracles he wasn't gonna lift a finger to help you out without making sure you were fucked anyway. He's really not an okay guy and has never really been portrayed as such.
>>140520039
I think it's more that they were afraid of him after all, even the Olympians would eventually die.
>>140519667
At least he gets better. On the other hand he was kinda right with the Olympians not helping them and instead restoring the Titan Temples for saving the Atlanteans.
Then the Greek attack, call their allies and it all goes to hell. Also who knew Krios was Kronos's agent until the Titans were set free?
>>140504028
Only if you count Christian denominations separately.
>>140519266
They don't English to begin with.
>>140520039
I think Hades was just a very misunderstood god. He wasn't even the guy to take you when your time came, he was just the ruler of the underworld.
I imagine the reason he helped Herakles was because the guy just asked nicely. And he also gave Orpheus what he wanted, even though his request was absolutely outrageous. Too bad Orpheus wasn't the kind of guy to RTFM.
>>140519816
Aphrodite was born from the severed testicles of Uranus, not his sister, more like her great aunt or something
>>140520201
Gods can't die by aging, they can be mutilated or imprisoned but I don't recall a god ever dying of old age.
do you have any greek mythology related hentai, anons?
>>140520472
>nerd
>locked in a volcano
>makes androids for fun and faps
>married with his aunt
>who is also the most lewd goddess of all
hmm...
>>140520486
Their was a prophecy that Zeus would be overthrown and killed by his son like his father and grandfather were.
>>140520569
That's not dying of age
>>140504098
You sound like a Manafag
>>140520569
Yes, a prophecy with Methis, that her and Zeus sons would kick him out.
Thats why he ate her and Athena ended up being born from his head. But since there was that prophecy, he never fucked a Methis again.
>>140520461
>he also gave Orpheus what he wanted
Because Persephone asked it of him, not because Orpheus did. And the terms he set for Orpheus and Eurydice's journey out of the underworld were made to screw Orpheus over anyway.
>>140520490
>Greek myth hentai
I'm just imagining the tags
>incest
>yuri
>yiao
>bestiality
>rule 63
>NTR
>rape
>>140517752
Agamemnon wasn't the guy who had his wife stolen. And he sacrificed his own daughter to get good winds to go to Troy. And there his pride caused huge problems. After he was forced to give up one of his concubines to appease a god, he stole the concubine of his strongest warrior out of simple spite causing him and all his men to sit out the war. That would have led to the defeat of the Greeks if Patroclus hadn't died and made Achilles rejoin the battle.
>>140520557
Seems cool, i would hang out with him
>>140520741
>cowgirl
>monstergirl
>gender bender
>hermaphrodite
>spider
>stone
CHRONOS PRIDE WORLWIDE!
Whys is this thread still here?
Where do you guys read myths? Any good places for it?
>>140485187
No, what the fuck made you think that?
>ctrl+f "sekkou"
Did you already forget the best show of last season?
>>140490747
>Let everyone one in love come and see. I want to break Venus’ ribs with clubs and cripple the goddess’ loins. If she can strike through my soft chest, then why can’t I smash her head with a club?
I know that feel
>>140520728
>the terms he set ... were made to screw Orpheus
I don't know if he set the terms as such, let alone to screw him over. Maybe it's just how it works. The living don't get to see the dead, so until she was officially living again, he simply had to not look. And if he'd just followed the recipe he could have just walked out of there and there would have been nothing Hades would have done about it.
And yes, Hades allowed it because of his nagging wife, but given the request it was pretty damn lenient that it was granted at all.
>>140521015
actually yes
might check it out again
>>140520885
>necrophilia
>tentacle
>mind break
>shota
>guro
>vore
>>140520926
New to /a/?
Biblical, roman, greek, sumerian and nordic threads give so much comparison talk that they are tolerated and tend to be fairly successful
>>140520947
the Iliad and the Odyssey is pretty important
>>140490747
> If anyone does not believe in Venus, they should gaze at my girl friend
Pic related, it's me and my bitch.
>>140520947
Hesiod, you pleb.
>>140493190
So Galatea looked exactly like Aphrodite?
I half expected her to take the statue's place for shits and giggles. That would have been a nice way to mess with the poor lad.
>>140520490
Sort of, there's a VN that has its roots on Greek mythology, and it has h-scenes. And some very good chuuni chants based on it, too.
>>140521196
well
>loli
![Fellini.Satyricon.1969.Criterion.BDRemux. rutracker.mkv_snapshot_00.02.01_[2015.10.02_00.50.42].png](https://i.imgur.com/HgWOhns.jpg "Fellini.Satyricon.1969.Criterion.BDRemux. rutracker.mkv snapshot 00.02.01 [2015.10.02 00.50.42]")
Guys, read the Satyricon, seriously.
>>140520800
Hephaestus was pretty hard to look at.
IIRC Aphrodite was forced to marry him because all the other gods wanted to fuck her and she them.
>yfw she cheats on him with Ares anyway
>yfw Eros is probably not even his son
>>140521836
>Aphrodite was forced to marry him because all the other gods wanted to fuck her and she them.
this sentence doesn't make any sense
is she a cuck lover
>>140521613
Source?
>>140520947
>doesn't know about the origin of pepe
>>140521995
https://vndb.org/v16134
The chants are seriously good btw.
>>140522226
>In the near future, fossil fuel deposits have dried up and nations scramble to secure the few resources which remained. It was at this time that Japan successfully discovered the previously unknown “Astral” particle was successfully discovered by Japan, which would solve all of the world’s energy problems. However, the other nations would not recognize Japan’s superiority and set out to take the new technology by force, sparking the Fifth World War.
>The entire world descended into a fierce war, but no one realized what was the greatest danger to humankind. The malfunctioning of the new Astral nuclear power reactors caused a seismic space-time earthquake which wiped out Japan and most of eastern Eurasia. With the birth of the second sun, Amaterasu, came a drastic change in the world situation. It was impossible to maintain the current culture with a lack of electronic circuits, so the war ended without any victor, but only a deep scar.
>It took a thousand years before humankind recovered from this catastrophe. Then another unprecedented calamity came to the capital of the military nation of Adler in former Western Europe. Blood and screams filled the burning streets as the city descended into bottomless despair. Two strange beings appeared to challenge the hero and test the fate of mankind.
>Zephyr did not believe this fierce heroic battle suited him and decided to run away instead. He did not care about winning the battle; he just wished to live a normal life. For the only girl whom he had saved, he promised to turn his back on everything. This is not a story about heroes; it is a tale about those who have lost.
>>140520947
perseus.tufts.edu/hopper
>>140522367
Yeah I'll skip that. Even ‘seriously good chants’ won't save that.
>>140521906
>Aphrodite was forced to marry him because all the other gods wanted to fuck her, and she them.
Better?
Basically all the gods wanted to get in her none existent panties, and she was totally okay with the idea.
>>140522367
>>140522923
Yes, stick to SOL, it's simpler.
>>140521836
>IIRC Aphrodite was forced to marry him because all the other gods wanted to fuck her and she them.
She agreed to marry him after he pointed out every gift that the others were going to give her was going to be made by him.
>>140494047
Truly the best girl.
>>140522226
>It was at this time that Japan successfully discovered the previously unknown “Astral” particle was successfully discovered by Japan
>>140522923
It isn't greek, but what about Tokyo Babel?
>be goddess of dawn
>spot handsome mortal man
>ask zeus to make him immortal
>he does, but doesn't give him eternal youth because apparently he's some kind of literal genie today
>he ages into a cricket
>zeus gives no strings attached immortality to some shepherd he wanted to plow
>>140523121
True, but her father proposed the marriage to curb her philandering ways which is hilarious ironic.
>>140523191
TB is excellent, but very poorly advertised, so nobody knows about it.
>>140523227
It isn't. She was competing with him and he didn't like that
>>140523324
That's pretty much the same thing isn't it?
>>140523261
I just wish it had a Samel route. It was the only fault I could find in it
>>140523377
No, because it was a calculated move. Less Aphrodita around, more men for Zeus.
>>140523395
I think everyone agrees on that. Samael is best girl, Setsuna's non-existent sex drive agrees.Lilith's route practically is that, though.
>>140523205
>be goddess of dawn
>far for Aries, the bad boy of the gods
>get pumped and dump
>his other side chick get jelly
>curses you with to be perma-horny
>can't stop /ss/ing
>>140490747
>Rome
>Greatest country
>buttsex and degeneracy
>downfall
>America
>greatest country
>buttsex and degeneracy
>???
Now we wait
>>140523483
I like to think that scene was her h-scene, stealing the true route
>>140523542
Good thing I'll be part of east america
>>140523542
Actually, it was the massive exodus of immigrants that destroyed the roman empire. In the end, tolerance destroyed them from within.
>>140485187
I interpret it as fairly lighthearted despite some of its themes.
>>140523726
That still applies to America.
Probably not. I don't know much about greeks, but the Greek emulated and learned from the ancient egyptians. Ancient Egyptian myths revolved around rape, homosexual elements, cuckoldry, and incest plays.
From what little I know of the greek myths, these are present in those.
>>140523726
Rome didn't fall until WW1.
Seriously, look up how Roman succesion went. Its insane how long it lasted.
>>140490747
>VII.9 (Eumachia Building, via della Abbondanza); 2048: Secundus likes to screw boys.
>Secundus is a faggot.
Anyone ever read those short stories of Greek myths as told from the perspective of Hades when they were kids?
>>140490747
>VIII.2 (in the basilica); 1864: Samius to Cornelius: go hang yourself!
The story of its ruin is simple and obvious; and, instead of inquiring why the Roman empire was destroyed, we should rather be surprised that it had subsisted so long. The victorious legions, who, in distant wars, acquired the vices of strangers and mercenaries, first oppressed the freedom of the republic, and afterwards violated the majesty of the purple. The emperors, anxious for their personal safety and the public peace, were reduced to the base expedient of corrupting the discipline which rendered them alike formidable to their sovereign and to the enemy; the vigour of the military government was relaxed, and finally dissolved, by the partial institutions of Constantine; and the Roman world was overwhelmed by a deluge of Barbarians.
— Edward Gibbon. The Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire, "General Observations on the Fall of the Roman Empire in the West", Chapter 38
>Remember kids. Multiculturalism kills.
>>140523840
>The filthy Turk or the Barbarous Ivan
>being legitimate succesors of Rome
Choose one
>>minstrels and harlots
>>140524143
Looking at Roman history it's hard to see how you arrived at that conclusion. The multicultural part of Rome's history was when it flourished, its downfall came later (but wasn't solely due to its new-found xenophobia).
>>140523840
>Rome didn't fall until WW1
>not sacked and pillaged to the ground by Visigoths and Vandals in 5th century
Go back to history class Alarich.
Would you read a manga about an ancient Roman boy doing ancient Roman things?
Also throw in some real historical figures, like based Catullus.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Catullus_16
>>140524720
>He thinks East Rome isn't Rome
>>140511651
Did hades ever have kids?
>>140490747
>VIII.2 (in the basilica); 1826: Phileros is a eunuch!
>>140523726
It was poor management, greater divide between plebs and patricians, carelessness of patricians, degeneracy being more common (less people were getting married), poor tax inefficiencies, Rome overextending itself, losses in military battles, etc..., that brought Rome down. The massive number in migrants is just a result of Roman agression anyway, you're confusing correlation with causation.
Also Christianity could be a cause of Rome's downfall but it's too politically incorrect to mention such a thing. Then again, Rome's downfall isn't necessarily a bad thing so any Christian reading this shouldn't be angry that a pagan civilization was brought down.
>>140490747
>On April 19th, I made bread
Shut the fuck up OP we're talking about bread
>>140524804
Would the real Ancient Rome really have accepted a Jewish religion? They spent all their existence persecuting Jews and Christians, seems very anti-Roman to suddenly become Christian...
>>140494837
Hestia a bestia.
>>140490747
>VIII.2 (in the basilica); 1882: The one who buggers a fire burns his penis
is this the origin of "don't stick your dick in crazy"?
>>140495236
"Goddess of wisdom" my ass.
>>140525152
If you bothered to read the New Testament, you would know that the Jews was left alone to do whatever.
If you read history, you will also know Christianity was some shitty little Suicide cult for most of its time as a cult.
>>140524937
Three, Macaria, Melinoe and Zagreus, although Macaria is the only one that's actually his. The other two were born because his brother Zeus decided to cuck him.
>>140525287
Fucking Zeus.
>>140525287
Once again, Zeus proves why he is worst god
>>140525251
>If you bothered to read the New Testament, you would know that the Jews was left alone to do whatever.
NT is not a history book.
>If you read history, you will also know Christianity was some shitty little Suicide cult for most of its time as a cult.
And yet Eastern "Rome" adopted it as a religion.
>>140525185
More like "Don't fuck that syphilitic girl, no matter how hot she is"
>>140525350
>And yet Eastern "Rome" adopted it as a religion.
And yet, Christianity is the religion of the West, and still is. Even if the present modern counter culture despises it.
>>140525091
>losses in military battles
Although Rome did suffer some painful blows early on, the real loss of Rome's fighting power was due to civil war and the ruling elite deliberately weakening the army to stay in power. The ‘overextending’ bit is mostly myth. Originally, the western countries had an incredible defence-in-depth, but due to various circumstances which were mostly the fault of the southern countries a civil war started and the defence of the west was reduced to just the limes. And that had dire consequences later on.
A lot of these problems were directly caused by the fact that for most groups of people war was the only way to effect change in imperial Rome. This is all tied into increased lack of political empowerment of the plebs, lack of real democracy, lack of a proper middle-class, a wide wealth gap and the rich owning almost everything.
>shouldn't be angry that a pagan civilization was brought down
By the time it was brought down it was a Christian civilisation though.
>>140523726
No, what destroyed them was the fact that they let Germans and Anglos live. These subhumans should have been annihilated.
>>140525410
>Christianity is the religion of the West
The West has been longer than being Christian though...
Regardless, I'm not talking about the West. I'm specifically stating that it's not very Roman for a Eastern Rome to adopt something Jewish,especially a religion they were discriminating against.
> Even if the present modern counter culture despises it.
Christianity was despised since the Enlightenment.
>>140525318
>>140525348
Fun fact Hades' wife is also one of Zeus' many illegitimate children.
>>140525527
It's called politics.
>>140525218
But isn't that what wisdom basically is? The understanding that although you may be right, you will never stand a chance against might?
Arachne lacked wisdom and got slapped down by the goddess of wisdom.
>>140525413
>The ‘overextending’ bit is mostly myth
It's not. It's one of the causes, not a single cause. There is never really a single cause in empires dying. It's an amalgam as a result of its complexity.
Every empire overextends itself at some point. Rome did as well.
>lack of real democracy
Except Rome was its greatest heights when it was an Empire.
>By the time it was brought down it was a Christian civilisation though.
At the final nail in the coffin. But Rome was degrading before that. Rome was much more glorious when it wasn't Christian.
>>140525527
>I'm specifically stating that it's not very Roman for a Eastern Rome to adopt something Jewish,especially a religion they were discriminating against.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theodosius_I
>Christianity was despised since the Enlightenment.
Read a book nigger. The religion was adored during that time. The organization wasn't.
You should really read up on the religion of the people at the time. Its gigantic bit of counter culture, but In God we Trust is there.
So, which is your favorite God? Hades for me.
>>140525527
Can you still call it counter culture at this point though?
>>140525717
Hades, Hephaistos, Poseidon
>>140490747
>Beta males declaring their love on wallbook
I.10.2-3 (Bar of Prima); 8258, 8259: The story of Successus, Severus and Iris is played out on the walls of a bar: [Severus]: “Successus, a weaver, loves the innkeeper’s slave girl named Iris. She, however, does not love him. Still, he begs her to have pity on him. His rival wrote this. Goodbye.”. [Answer by Successus]: “Envious one, why do you get in the way. Submit to a handsomer man and one who is being treated very wrongly and good looking.” [Answer by Severus]: “I have spoken. I have written all there is to say. You love Iris, but she does not love you.”
>>140525798
Successus BTFO
>>140525708
Not him but during revolutionary France they tried to make Catholicism illegal and institute a religion based on rationality in its place. They even had a temple built with Greek philosophers carved in it.
>>140525691
>Every empire overextends itself at some point.
Not true. Overextending is when you expand your territory beyond where your economic and military apparatus can support it.
Rome's territory had been more or less constant and its downfall came mainly because for many reason it destroyed itself from within. Overextension played no role.
>>140525636
Athenafags are out in full force I see.
>>140525879
Look at it this way: Even back then they did not go for Atheism, and they wanted to worship something.
Atheism has been a pariah trough out the entire of history, until far into modern times. And Atheism is still a pariah outside of the modern world.
I remember one time Athena dressed herself as a man and seduced a mortal woman. Seduced might not be the "correct" term. There was a lot of, do what you're told, or your whole family gets it part. She was a Sybil or something.
>>140525691
>Except Rome was its greatest heights when it was an Empire.
The empire (and the lead-up to the political disenfranchisement of pretty much everyone who wasn't born into the ruling elite) started off the endless cycle of civil war and it also necessitated the emperors to fuck over the legions. It managed to get a good run on its inertia, but the seeds for its decline and fall were sown early.
>>140485187
Nope.
i'd like to read the graffiti in original latin. anyway, it got me thinking about why were they so fuckin gay, and i guess it might've been because they didnt have condoms so doing women was risky business.
>>140485187
>Hiro rejected my application in favor of faggots who leave this thread up
>>140525717
Heracles.
>>140525972
They were atheist Making a temple and a religion to rationality doesn't mean believing in deities. The Anglo intellectual world was by comparison Deist though.
>>140525623
You're replying to the wrong post.
>>140525708
>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theodosius_I
That's not disproving my point. For most of Roman history, Christianity was an oppressed religion.
>The religion was adored during that time
Voltaire on Christianity:
>"[Christianity] is assuredly the most ridiculous, the most absurd and the most bloody religion which has ever infected this world. Your Majesty will do the human race an eternal service by extirpating this infamous superstition, I do not say among the rabble, who are not worthy of being enlightened and who are apt for every yoke; I say among honest people, among men who think, among those who wish to think. … My one regret in dying is that I cannot aid you in this noble enterprise, the finest and most respectable which the human mind can point out.."
You're an idiot and should read more. Many of them were deists (i.e they were theists without a religion). They despised Christianity. Some were Christian though.
And during the Enlightenment, there were anti-Christian groups in France.
>>140525879
Exactly. It also explains why during the Enlightenment and after it, there was much more focus on Ancient Greek literature and other things pagan then before.
>>140525972
You're trying so hard to escape your cognitive dissonance it's funny. You're going to have to revise your Western identity.
>>140520490
Mentaiko's Priapus. Zeus is kind of out of character though.
Not following Atomism.
Shit or not, lil nigga figured the shit back then way faster than any fucker around but noooo, lets makes "le elements" instead!!!
>>140526324
Do you have to post like that?
>>140525947
Rome venturing beyond the Rhine was overextending. They didn't hold much territory if any but there were campaigns.
>>140526116
The empire also gave Rome the ability to become strong. You can't look it in just one side.
Yes civil wars and coups became more likely
as an Empire but it also made the civilization stronger. Republic made it more stable but not necessarily better. There is a drawback to many things.
>>140485357
> Greek mythos as shonen battlemanga
> First time a decent Battle manga finishes a fucking boat trip.
>>140526162
Maybe he sensed how power hungry you are eh?
I liked the story about the couple who loved one another so much that they couldn't stand watchingn one die before the other, so the Gods just turned them into a pair of trees.
It's very romantic.
>>140525636
So basically, "just because you're correct doesn't mean you're right."
>>140526065
>Have a hot priestess that every wants to fugg working for you
>your uncle rapes her in your temple
>decide to make her even better at making men hard
>>140526161
I went to Barcelona with a professor who read Latin and some Greek and walked around various ruins, with him reading aloud everything he saw. In addition to all the "CCXIII this stone block was put here by Joe Romanus and Phil Publicus to commemorate our good drinking buddy Marc who killed a Lusitanian", there was a ridiculous amount of dumb graffiti, even on temples.
Also, apparently the Romans found it fucking hilarious that the Greek word for bed, κοίτη (which shows up in a few idioms of the sort that you find in mosaic floors), sounds just like coitus.
Which Greek laddie was it who went on a quest of some sort and then pissed away fucking YEARS just fucking around in some almost utopian kingdom?
>>140526653
nice
i try to write some latin shitpost too
>is spectumquoque ne cinematographatum Asianum
>>140526540
Literally the only story where the gods aren't huge dicks.
So what anime would Diogenes shitpost about on /a/?
>>140526928
He'd probably post wagecuck threads on /r9k/.
>>140490747
>IX.8.3 (House of the Centenary; in the atrium); 5213: My lusty son, with how many women have you had sexual relations?
ara, ara
>>140521026
That's a very metal way of cursing love.
So today I learned that the Greeks were kink freaks with as much shitposting tenacity as a regular 4chaner. I guess some things never change.
>>140526928
Diogenes would be an One Piece fag.
>>140526733
You're either talking about Jason, who dicked away on a island of women, Odysseus got lost at sea for 10 years, or Aeneas who fell in love with Dido and chilled in Carthage for a while.
>>140527220
Aeneas isn't a Greek myth though.
>>140526367
>Rome venturing beyond the Rhine was overextending
Most of Rome's campaigns beyond the Rhine were to put border peoples in place. There were also some diplomatic missions. Most of Rome. The border of the empire was firmly set at the limes for most of the time and most actions beyond the border were in defence of that border. And Rome at its initial strength could have held it, it was Rome screwing itself over internally which caused the limes to fall and the empire to collapse.
None of this has got anything to do with overextending. I hear this meme all the time. ‘All empires eventually overextend and collapse.’ But most empires that have fallen have done so for completely different reasons, like them screwing themselves up from the inside, changed social realities causing a dissolution into separate entities rather than a downfall, sudden catastrophe, sudden contact with another expanding and possibly bigger empire, ... the list is endless.
>The empire also gave Rome the ability to become strong.
This is incorrect. A lot of the early expansion happened under much more difficult circumstances during the period when it was a republic. Rome's strength came from a large economic area with no internal borders under dispute (most of the time until civil wars became a national hobby), the way Rome put its state and its armies to use for the Roman state, employing the entire Roman economy if need be (this was what Hannibal didn't understand and what eventually caused his downfall), a well-regulated military and a well-organised state (including the legal system and bureaucracy) in general.
The empire, or the transitioning to it, was mostly a formalisation of the change which had been ongoing for a while towards a system where the emperor rules it all. The benefit was to the emperor, not the Roman state. And it had a great weakness: the only way to press for change was to wage war.
>>140527268
You're right, he was totally real and my ancestor.
t. Augustus
>>140527268
Yeah but he was a survivor of the Trojan war.
>>140527220
Must have been Jason.
>>140527175
Well, they didn't have 4chan back then but they SURE HAD 4walls to shitpost.
>>140513895
Aquilles.
>>140518026
Marin.
>>140525527
It wasn't only Eastern Rome that accepted christianity
all of Rome was christian after Constantine
>>140526928
He plucked a chicken, he didn't plug it. (I hope.)
The whole exercise was a tiresome exercise in pedantry from which nobody learnt anything, least of all he himself. I know the type, stupid people who think they're smart.
I'm pretty sure Atlantis may have existed. And that Minoan Crete was a settlement of this once prosperous and advanced civilization.
A pity they ended up drowning.
>>140495236
Some versions have Athena winning, and then turning Arachne into a spider.
Still a bitch move regardless.
>>140495358
How that guy turned into Mars is beyond me.
Mars was great.
>>140516443
>But that's the wrong hole Zeus-sama!
>IX.8.3 (House of the Centenary; in the latrine near the front door); 5243: “Secundus defecated here” three time on one wall.
kek literal shitposting
>>140527677
What he did was the opposite of pedantry.
>>140527661
Let's not confuse things though. You had people in Rome(proper) well into the 5th century as the West was falling to the Goth who were still saying that they should return to the traditional religion. And in the East Greco-Paganism didn't go away completely until it was forcefully removed in the 9th century.
>>140511130
> No mention of Enyo, literal god of war crimes.
>>140527729
Oldest versions have Arachne winning.
Besides, we know the Gods were dicks.
Artemis turned a boy into a girl and raised her in a harem of nymphs and became her lover.
Aphrodite had Adonis, a boy whose beauty was so great that even the god of war got cucked because Aprodite openly slept with all, but she openly said her love was for the mortal boy she raised.
Hera had been fucking Zeus cupbearer, perhaps the only lover didn't mind "I wonder why? Maybe she was okay as long they were guys?"
There's so, so many fuckeries.
>>140527707
That image is labelled ‘Styx’ but it is actually meant to depict a Slavic water demon that drowns people. (Which is fine too in a myth thread.)
>>140511538
Yeah, fuck Jaffe's overpowered edgelord.
>>140513895
Hector
>>140490747
>VII.12.18-20 (the Lupinare); 2192: Sollemnes, you screw well!
"Sollemnes-kun! My hips are moving on their own!!"
>>140513895
Odysseus with Hercules coming right after
>>140527922
>Artemis turned a boy into a girl and raised her in a harem of nymphs and became her lover.
Oh I know exactly why I have this erection.
>>140488910
>Ancient Greece
>novels
Is this how it feels to be a highschool dropout/comp sci major?
>>140527922
>Artemis turned a boy into a girl and raised her in a harem of nymphs and became her lover.
Lucky bastard.
Becomes the grill and fucks a godly christmas cake.
>>140527833
It was pedantry and he himself knew it at the time. Of course ‘featherless’ didn't include creatures that had their feathers unnaturally removed. Neither did it include dogs with two amputated legs (I saw a video on the internet once of such a dog actually walking, cannot be arsed to search for it though). The dead-pan modification of the definition and he himself not bothering with glueing flat nails on the chicken shows that both he and his audience knew that he wasn't actually saying something smart or deep, but just being irritating for the sake of it.
Of course the definition had real problems (none of which he recognised or pointed out by the way) but then again Charles Darwin was still rehearsing his lines in the wings.
>>140528045
>>140528094
No it isn't. Biggest insult one could do was to be compared to a woman.
All for what? He didn't even spy on her, he just wanted some water to drink and didn't know the goddess was there.
So, I get that Greeks enjoyed incest, rape, yaoi, monster girls, shotas, and many other things, but about loli?
They can't be /a/ without loli.
>>140527922
How many STDs did Aphrodite have?Would fucking her be worth it?
>>140517677
As far as all the shit Greek gods were doing, kidnapping and forced marriage is on the low end of the scale. I mean just look at Poseidon who literally drowns people for shits and giggles, and then there's Zeus who basically rapes everything he can stick his dick into.
>>140528280
Either she turned him into a girl or kill him.
Which do you think she prefered to do?
Besides, he didn't do it out of malice and the goddess knew and personally made him, now her, hang around the most exclusive cult around. The girl was untouchable, only to gods.
Guess the religion.powerlevels
>>140528576
Do immortals have immortal STDs?
>>140485187
Wouldn't such an idea just be another modern interpretation?
>>140528576
None. But there was one time where Hephestus wanted to know who Aphrodite cheated on him, so he made this magical net.
The next day, he found Zeus, Poseidon, Ares, Apollo and other lesser known gods and even mortals.
Eventually the shame was so great and Zeus was so pissed that he ordered Hephestus to release him and well, everybody.
The bastard was a cuck.
>>140528702
Hinduism
>>140528641
How many times do you think Zeus raped her?
>>140527922
>Hippolytus takes vows to become a wizard
>Aphrodite is buttmad about it
>get Hippolytus' step mom to fall in love with him
>step mom's nurse tells Hippolytus
>Hippolytus says he's not interested in "3DPD!"
>Nurse makes him promise not to tell his father
>step mom hangs herself after being rejected
>Hippolytus' father finds a letter that claims that she an heroed because she was raped
>Hippolytus sworn to secrecy by nurse so won't tell his father what really happened
>askes Poseidon to kill his Hippolytus as revenge
>Hippolytus a kill when his chariot loses control due to Poseidon frightening the horses
>turns out nurse planted the suicide not
>nurse was working for Aphrodite all along
>Aphrodite killed a guy for being asexual
>>140490747
III.5.3 (on the wall in the street); 8898: Theophilus, don’t perform oral sex on girls against the city wall like a dog
>>140528702
Karna vs Superman
>>140528574
I don't think they had stories about lolis.
There are few stories about women who were not goddesses in general.
>>140490747
>V.3.9 (House of Cosmus and Epidia; right of the door); 6702: Aufidius was here. Goodbye
He was an hero ;_;7
>>140526733
That sounds more like Urashima Taro.
>>140528984
He didn't exactly go on a quest.
>>140528902
Theseus kidnapped Helen when she was like 9 didn't he?
>>140528902
Helen of Troy was actually a loli when she first appears. Theseus actually kidnaps her with the intent to marry her when she came of age. i believe she was around 7-10 years old at the time
>>140490747
>VIII.2 (in the basilica); 1880: The man I am having dinner with is a barbarian.
The tittle seems legit, I wonder if his LN was successful.
>>140529027
>>140529089
They fucked like crazy didn't they
>>140528846
>But there was one time where Hephestus wanted to know who Aphrodite cheated on him, so he made this magical net.
>The next day, he found Zeus, Poseidon, Ares, Apollo and other lesser known gods and even mortals
Holy shit lel
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q-yUaLqsbuw
Greatest Empire to ever live. Lasting for over a thousand years. The living proof of superiority and the final great empire.
>Otaku MC
>hates 3DPD
>be first day of the 2nd trimester of his first year of high school
>Aphrodite transfers into his class
>sits next to MC
>entire series is Aphrodite trying to seduce MC, who vehemently rejects all of her advances
Anime when?
>>140529027
>>140529089
Theseus was a man of great taste.
If he had succeed, the Trojan war could have been avoided.
>>140529165
Have you not heard tales of Aphrodite's sexual hunger? It was said whoever bested her in bed could conquer the world!
No one did.
She DID have a boy toy though. Adonis. But Adonis does not count.
>>140528867
How does one perform oral sex on girls ‘like a dog’? I know two positions that are used by dogs and neither lend themselves to oral sex.
>>140485187
>offtopic thread
>400 post
>>140529331
I think he meant the part about having sex against a city wall in public.
>>140529331
Only dogs lick people senpai
In those days women were at the bottom, and eating them out was seen as placing yourself lower. Yet boifucking made you a man
>>140529331
It has been lost through the ages.
The great sexual technique. Whoever masters it will be the king of porn!!! I ain't even joking. We recently even discovered an ancient sexual position called, the "amazon position" google it.
>>140529180
S2
>Hephaestus transfers in chasing after his fiance
>hates MC
>eventually becomes bros when they realize they have the same hobbies
>>140529371
The more we post in it the faster we can get it to reach bump limit. And next time we can just tell them to fuck off right off the bat.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Typhon
Best dad and husband in classical mythology.
>>140529472
S3
>Zeus transfers in
>begins cucking everyone
>>140529371
>>140529479
You guys haven't been here for very long have you
>>140527175
It's comforting to know.
>>140529541
This thread isn't /a/ related faggot. You could literally have the same thread on /int/ or /his/.
>>140529472
>eventually becomes bros when they realize they have the same hobbies
Building robot sluts? Because Hephestus had a fuck ton of helpers, female automatas he made for the sole purpose of tending to his needs.
Don't ask my why? But at this point he never wanted Aphrodite after she fucked half the world. The other half being dead people.
>>140529621
Fuck off and make a thread there then faggot. These threads are /a/
>>140529602
The only time it's been okay to have threads like these was when that anime about the Roman bathhouse architect was airing.
>>140529479
You mean like >>140485326?
>>140529413
>amazon position
What's the appeal? It looks impersonal and doesn't seem optimal in terms of penetration depth.
>>140529625
Would you want your waifu anymore if she fucked half the world? There's only so much a man can take
>>140529602
Clearly they haven't, Cl/a/ssics is a long time tradition on /a/
>>140529625
Sexbots are fine, remember Chobits?
>>140529678
You fuck off with your off topic shit. This is what made /v/ shit. You take it elsewhere.
>>140518370
>And she gets away with.
Not if you follow Helen of Euripides.
>>140529742
Fuck. Off.
>>140529742
We already had threads like this before /v/ became shit.
>>140529690
Cl/a/ssics has been around for a while now. Should've stopped it back then if you hated it so much
>>140529798
Fuck off.
>>140529719
He didn't even want to marry her. But the gods said. Zeus buddy, which is the best guy suited to marry her. He couldn't take side so he picked the weakest god to marry her.
Hephestus wanted Athena, not Aphrodite.
This thread has made me want to some classical / mythological anime.
I know of Fate, Gate and Thermæ Romæ which I'll check out forthwith. Any other recs?
>>140518370
>And she gets away with.
From what I recall, she was actually not the one to blame.
Paris took her but she hated him and wanted to go back. In more than one occasion she insults Paris because he is a coward and prays Aphrodite to help her get away from him.
>>140529890
Shit, I knew a badass manga set in roman times.
It was about this chick/dude every full moon changed gender and was linked to the goddess of the moon demeter or something.
>>140529887
>Hephestus wanted Athena, not Aphrodite.
>want pure virgin waifu who carries the Aegis
>get stuck with a Stacy who is known as a whore of the ages
>>140529973
Well, almost everybody ended bad, but Helen got home safe with her husband after the war. Paris IS a coward. No doubt about that.
Relevant. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M_JVaMuZZBQ
Catullus 16
I will sodomize you and face-fuck you,
Cocksucking Aurelius and bottom-man Furius,
You who think, from my verses
Because they are delicate, that I have no shame.
For it is right for the devoted poet
To be chaste himself, but it's not
Necessary for his verses to be so.
[Verses] which then indeed have taste and charm,
If they are delicate and a little shameless,
And because they can incite an itch,
And I don't mean in boys, but in
Those hairy old men who can't get it up.
You, because you have collected many thousands of my kisses,
You think me less of a man?
I will sodomize you and face-fuck you.
Cheers, based thread.
>>140528702
Which mythology has the most edgelords?
>>140529973
>>140530107
Actually Hera made a cloud doll and tricked Paris with it and whisked the real Helen away at Egypt where only suffering waited until Menelaus stumbles after the war and saves her.
>>140530337
Good cl/a/ssics threads are hard to come by. Hopefully we can have another good one soon.
>buttmad newshits whining about MUH OFFTOPIC
Holy shit fuck off back to MAL you tryhard autists.
>>140490747
>II.2.3 (Bar of Athictus; right of the door); 8442: I screwed the barmaid
Right to the point. I bet he was a student of stoicism.
>>140530373
Abrahmic.
No doubt about that.
They want to bring the end of the world and enslave everyone to their bidding. Kneel or die type of deal. Doesn't even give you a choice.
>>140529180
I see your premise and raise you.
>Greek gods as students in a Japanese high-school.
Think of the possibilities!
>>140529180
>>140530574
There's an otome game/anime that did this.
It's not great.
>>140495236
>reading the wrong version
>>140530574
Zeus rapes the teacher.
REGARDLESS of gender. Calling it. He also rapes the chair the table, the floor, the air, the chalkboard. He'd be like a sex roach.
>>140530407
Well, that wasn't in the Iliad for sure.
>>140530657
It wasn't.
>>140530552
Can't argue with that.
>>140530107
After the fall of Troy, Menelaus finds Helen and is about to kill her, her robe falls off and he sees her tits. Menelaus promptly forgets what he was doing.
>>140530657
Read nigga, read.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Helen_%28play%29
>>140530754
I feel like some anime has done that before but I can't recall when
>>140530754
Man, she's so hot.
So hot.
I wanna tap that.
Can't argue with that.
>>140530631
Really?
>It wasn't good.
Fuck...
>>140530815
My king. Before your sword impales me, let me show you the likeness of my body, let you long sharp blade pierce through this warm flesh and savor its untold pleasures.
Blade?!! Woman! You are going to get my dick!! Get back to the ship!
>>140530815
>>140531022
I'd watch it
>>140530337
My favourite Roman poet.
>>140495515
>my husband is an unfaithful manwhore but I can't do anything about him so I'll torture his bastard son instead!
>>140530574
What stereotype would each god fall into?
>Apolo is the blonde bishounen.
>Artemis is the super strict captain of the archery club.
>Athena is the glasses-wearing class prez.
>Hera is the oujou student council prez.
>etc.
Others?
>>140530337
>I may be gay but I'm no fag
Kek
>>140531022
The reason he spared Helen came down to the fact that she was taken against her will at the age of ten, and 13 years pass since the war ends and he meets a woman, not a child. The most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Basically, his dick punched him up to the chin.
Yeah, yeah troy burning very nice and all, cover yourself and come with me before someone else abducts you.
>>140531189
>Hermes is the genki energetic boy
>Hephaustus is a meek tech otaku
>Hestia is everyone's onee-san
>Poseidon is FREE!
>Mars is captain of the kendo club while also being member of judo as well
>>140531189
Aries is the schools banchou
Hermes is the captain of high track team
Hades is the class emo
>>140530046
I cannot find it from the description unfortunately.
>>140531189
>Aphrodite is the school idol
>>140531331
>>140531310
>>140531189
>Aphrodite is the gyaru slut.
>Zeus is a wannabe Sakamoto.
>>140531297
It's amazing what a little bit of estrogen can do.
>>140531189
>Dionysus is the bro kind of character that always organizes parties, mixers, karaokes and surprise visits to your house but gets lost in stuff like these when you need him
>>140495515
>My daughter/sister/niece can't be this cute
>>140531189
Would Athena be a closet otaku?
Also, >>140517687
>Eros is the elementary schooler who the high school boys use to meet chicks
>Pan is the guy always looking after the animals
> Artemis is Apollo's imouto who just transferred from an all girls school
>>140531501
So the semi-delinquent that'salways smiling.
>>140531396
>140531189
>Hera is the oujou student council prez.
Hera is the vice president and Zeus is the president but he sneaks off all the time to do
>Zeus is a wannabe Sakamoto
to impress the other female students and hit on them only for Hera to drag him back to the student council room.
>>140490747
This will never stop being funny.
>>140531706
Don't forget Zeus loves boy pussy too
>>140531566
Plebs had an episode, The Erotic Vase, where incest was one plot points.
>>140531706
I do not understand hera. She is spiteful to all of zeus lovers but when he brings home a boy she is okay with it? I mean, we are talking about the guy who was made cupbearer of the gods and fed grapes to hera, he fed grapes to hera.
>>140531933
Well that explains why she's okay with it then. She didn't want him to run off on his own, she wanted to swing together with her husband.
>>140531933
Hera is secretly a fujo
>>140531310
>>Mars
>greek
>>140531310
>Mars
Stop this
>>140532181
I fucked up. Meant to write Ares.
>>140531933
Hera is a fan of yaoi
See you guys next cl/a/ssics thread
>>140532328
More like threesomes. But yeah, she was drooling and clingy of zeus boyfriend.
>>140532286
Funny.My first language is greek. I literally got lost in translation
>>140531933
When it's gay it okay where Hera is concerned.
Also she didn't want any more competing successors.
>>140528861
Aphrodite killed a lot of people for being asexual. She considered it forsaking her because you were flipping the bird to love, and by extension, to her as well.
>>140532581
>Aphrodite was a self centered whore that claimed to be the goddess of love but didn't even know what it was
Worst goddess
![latest[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/AKxgqin.jpg "latest[1]")
![latest[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/nQp1gBW.jpg "latest[1]")
