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D&D treats all animals as TN because supposedly they act on instinct alone but let's be honest: some animals are rather pleasant while others are pure evil. What alignment would you assign to what animals for what reasons? I'll start.Before the obvious objections arise, this is afungameforfun
Honey bees:
>Work hard, directly and indirectly responsible for about a third of the food humans consume
>Not agressive, generally don't mess with you if you don't mess with them
>Even if they attack, they will lose their stinger and die so violence is always a last resort
>Highly organized and hierarchcial society in service of their queen and the greater good
Obviously lawful good
Wasps on the other hand:
>Highly agressive
>Can both bite and sting
>Can sting as often as they want
>Often attack and murder honey bees, sometimes even infiltrating their hives
>They exist purely to fuck shit up
>Parasitic wasps were horrid enough to make Darwin denounce his faith in a benevolent creator deity
If that doesn't scream Chaotic Evil I don't know what does
>>46356621
>Confusing aggression for morals, rather than accepting it as instincts developed to ensure survival of the species.
>Including data about how they interact with humans, who are basically out of their scope of understanding.
OP clearly doesn't understand their own topic. The begged excuse as "for fun" isn't relevant, because if that's the case then you have to assign the cultural concepts of good/evil and lawful/chaotic to entire species for new reasons of your own choosing rather than based on actual facts (and animals will otherwise typically line up as lawful and neutral because they live in organized groups).
Wew
>>46356621
Honey Badger = Chaotic Neutral
>>46356621
while wasps are universally agreed to be dicks, they are a very good pesticide for all natural, non-flower-based fields.
If it is flower based, use bees instead, as the pollination boon is more valuable than the pesticide boon, and bees do a marginal job of pesticide on their own. Just not as good as the absolutely vicious wasps.
Yeah man, I'm sorta sick of how many people say animals are true neutral cause their acting on their own interests yet a villain who sees himself as Neutral Good but he's Chaotic Evil in reality is completely fine. If a bear is attacking you, it's gonna be evil. If it's protecting it's cubs, it's lawful evil.
>>46356621
I want to get kidnapped by beegirls in order to become a hiveslut/drone who is force fed honey and has to breed with a highly pregnant queen all day.
Then in the winter I get my ass thrown out and die from the cold.
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>>46360002
>Then in the winter I get my ass thrown out and die from the cold.
What kind of mammal are you?
>>46360467
A naked furless one over 100 km away from the nearest road in a place below freezing temperatures. Drones get thrown out in the winter. Nature is cruel.
Maybe the only way to survive the winter is to whore yourself out to the rest of the hive so you can stay.
>>46360701
>not immediately surviving in these situations
>>46359423
I wish there weren't facebook meme animals
Wolverines are more durrable anyways
![Khans-of-Tarkir-Art[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/wen14qs.jpg "Khans-of-Tarkir-Art[1].jpg")
>>46360701
>furless
Kill an animal, steal his fur
>muh food
Look at the furless animal in front of you. See all that soft stuff? Eat it.
>Muh weapons
See all those bones in front of you? Pick the biggest, heaviest one. Now go hunt an even bigger animal, steal his fur, eat his meat and use his even bigger bone to kill an even bigger animal.
You're a man, act like one!
>>46356621
You seem to be making a confusion between moral character and usefulness to humans. You're going to call anything that works with humans as "lawful" and anything that works independently (e.g. not with humans) as "chaotic". You're also going to call anything that produces a useful material "good", confusing humans taking a resource of something with intentionally spending energy to better others, while you are calling anything which destroys some human material to be "evil".
Let's look at some examples.
>Bees work together with humans, can be controlled by humans, and produce goods for humans. Lawful Good
>Dogs work together with humans, work in packs, and provide a service to humans. Lawful Good
>Horses work together with humans, work in herds, and provide a service to humans. Lawful Good
>Sheep are cared for by humans, follow human directions, and provide a good to humans. Lawful Good
>Chickens stay together in coops, will likely get killed on their own, and provide a good to humans. Neutral Good
>Wolves eat sheep and chickens. They work together in packs. Lawful Evil
>Termites work together and destroy wooden houses. Lawful Evil
>Foxes eat chickens (not really but let's say) and work independently. Chaotic Evil
>Bears live independently but don't bother human farms. Chaotic Neutral
And so on. Note that for all the "Good" animals, it would be considered slavery to be treating an intelligent species this way: forcing them to live with humans and then taking their gathered resources for human use.
Also, note that morality can be highly different based on perspective. Humans are considered neutral by human-morality, but if there was such a thing as "deer-morality", then humans would be considered as Evil as you are considering wasps.
Boop
>>46360002
One, you are probably low, low, low on the roster of available breeding stock. Two, male drones die when they have sex due to having their internal organs ripped out. Three, please take this /d/eviancy where it belongs.
>>46366989
If I'm human and they're part human my penis will likely be okay. Only one way to find out. Also it's /h/ not /d/.
>>46367106
>bondage
>force feeding
>pregnant insect sex
>guro
No, that's a fairly /d/ fantasy.
>>46367106
Imagine the lives if bee girls actually became a thing. They would have to turn away endless hordes of delusional neck beards who don't realize having "a penis" and having "a desirable penis" are two separate distinctively different things.
>>46367297
That's easy. Every other man (except for /r9k/ for some reason) knows you can trick them into thinking your penis is a desirable one. Just like with real women.
>>46367209
I didn't even think about the forcefeeding and the pregnant sex part desu. It just was there because bees. Oh well, I guess it really is /d/ except guro is banned on /d/.
>>46356621
If anything, animal aligments should just be different shades of neutral. Animals don't have capacity for complex more structures like concept of good and evil, but it's pretty easy to argue that hive insects like bees and ants are LN, what's with their highly organized and rigid society where each individual exists to serve a common purpose.
>>46360002
There's a race od beegirls in PF that does all that except the dumping you out during the winter. They just eat you when you're too old to fuck the queen.
>>46368847
Oh Pathfinder. Why am I not surprised? Well at least I'll be susitence for my kids or something.
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>>46366989
>Two, male drones die when they have sex due to having their internal organs ripped out.
Holy shit, and here I was thinking bees were the only insects that kind of treated their men well.
Are there any animals that don't treat their men like shitincluding humans? Nature is fucking scary.
>>46368988Seahorses. No joke. The female seahorse stays with her mate after the deed. She cuddles and provides gentle touching during the male's 'pregnancy'. They also pair for life. The trade off is M-preg
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>>46369050I'm obviously no biologist but if the men are the ones that get impregnated, how is it decided that they are the men and the other ones are the women? I'm pretty sure there's some logic behind it but when just looking at it like the outside, you'd think the men are the women and vice versaAlso, M-preg isn't a horrible trade off for not being treated like a disposable tool
>>46369076
It's all about which one lays the eggs-- to seahorses, the female has an ovipositor, which pseudo-"impregnates" the male until the eggs hatch.
>>46369076
Eggs and sperm mainly. Ovipositor might be kind of phallic but it's a female organ because of the eggs. And any recepticle for it can still be a male organ if it inseminates the eggs deposited into it.
>>46368988
There's some parrots that mate for life and take care of their chicks together.
>>46369076
The female lays eggs, but deposits them into a pouch on the male's stomach, where they stay until they hatch.
>>46369076
The female is the one that makes eggs, the male is the one that fertilizes them.
>>46360772
Do they have biteproff hardened fur?
The ability to sleep of cobra venom?
>>46356621
>while others are pure evil
Show us on the doll where the raccoon touched you anon.
>>46368988
Well with lions its the Men that are shits.
>>46368988
Penguins mate for life, if I'm not mistaken.
>>46369934
They are also cannibals, paedophiles and necrophillacs.
>>46371088
So are humans.
>>46356621
Centipedes are CE. Nothing with that many legs and a poison bite is capable of being anything else.
