A bored wizard from the 5th Dimension visits our planet and turns all mythological beings real. Depending on your local folk lore, how fucked are you?
I'm Scandinavian. I'd probably wander into a nearby forest and try to make friends with some elves.
Well I'm in the states, so unless you give us Native American myths I guess all we'd get is Bigfoot and Slendermen
I live in Northeastern USA, so as far as i know we have a shitload of ghost living in abandoned houses, bigfoot, demons, windigos, and some sort of demon that loves booze. As long as you carry around hard scotch and a cross you should be good.
>>47510309
>making friends
>with elves
Good luck with that, m8
>>47510309
I'm a Mississippi Man but I don't think there's any spooky scary mythological things in this state. I think there's stuff in neighboring states, but I doubt they'll take a trip here any time soon. OP, don't make friends with the Fair Folk.
Living in western Europe I will finally witness dragon ducks of apocalypse and goats with additional legs of uneven length
Also the saints
>>47510309
The over abundance of gnomes would make me insane.
My house just burned down because I forgot to give old porridge to the sauna gnome.
Fucking thanks.
>>47510784
>sauna gnome.
What?
>>47510842
A gnome, or, I guess "elf" would be a better term, which lives in your sauna, keeps it clean and working and helps humies occasionally.
If it's happy and content, that is, if it gets pissed, it burns your shit.
>>47510364
>Well I'm in the states, so unless you give us Native American myths I guess all we'd get is Bigfoot and Slendermen
You could pull quite a lot more out of old frontier lore: Paul Bunyan with his giant blue ox, Jersey Devil, Nain Rouge (red dwarf), Mothman.
>>47510889
Besides the burning that actually doesn't sound like a bad deal.
>>47510923
Yeah, it isn't. Old folklore, atleast in Finland, has a lot of spirits or elves which are helpful and friendly if you manage to not piss them off, and that's why people left some food for them.
All important buildings, the sauna, the building of residence, the storehouse and the cowshed had their own elves which helped to keep things in good order aslong as they weren't pissed.
If they got pissed, they burned your shit, summoned demons to fuck your shit, ate your children, ate your food and so on.
>>47510982
Was there an all purpose elf? Why have many elves to take care of your things when you can have one elf to do it?
>>47511015
As far as I know, every elf had it's own area of expertise, so to speak. It might be different in other areas of Finland and Karelia, though, as folklore does often have slight local alterations.
In addition, elves weren't really thought as to be pets or animals, but spirit-beings which have the power to either leave you be or fuck your shit up beyond repair. You didn't get an elf to do things for you, but the elf did things for you aslong as it was happy. It was thought to be a more or less symbiotic relationship between humans and the fey folk.
In addition to elfs, there were also other spiritual beings in Finnish folklore, like the hiisi, which are sometimes evil and malicious and other times neutral beings. A lot of strange looking natural stuff, like glacial erratics, were thought to be their doing-
>>47511174
I never meant like a pet, Anon. I assumed it was you make a deal with an elf and you keep it happy.
I live in London.
I'd obviously travel to Avalon and at once pledge loyaly to the true king of England.
Although I'm staunchly anti-monarchist, I'd follow Arthur to hell and back.
>>47511310
Alright, I understand your chain of reasoning, but it isn't like that. The elf just sort of comes to dwell in your buildings when you build them.
Sort of like in Heroes of Might and Magic, really.
Back when I was a kid, my grandmothermay she rest in piecetold me of some sort of cursed people living underground. They were born out of biblical Eva, somehow, but not of Adam, so they were bastards and thus banished underground, and that's why they're jealous of humans and steal cattle and kids and occasionally burn your shit. Can't remember what she called them, though.
I live in Oregon so Bigfoot, Paul Bunyan and his Ox, and a bunch of Native American shit I guess.
Bigfoot would most likely be like having apes in the woods so meh. Paul Bunyan's a cool guy, probably gonna make our pancake industry skyrocket and take jobs away from logging.
As for the native stuff, there's not much of it here.
>mfw captcha
>>47510309
Britfag here. So Giants, Fey of all types, the odd Dragon, various Ghosts and Spirits.
And right now I'm trying to remember what the fuck the Lampton Worm is, because it's near by and I haven't heard the story in years.
>>47512215
>>47510905
>>47510364
>implying bigfoot isn't real
>>47511499
Sounds like morlocks 2bh.
Probably have to break out the ol' shotgun and deal with some damned chupacabra.
>>47510309
British, so personally? Totally fucked, probably going to become some Fae's slave.
The country as a whole? Eternal thanks to King Arthur.
>>47510309
>Jersey devil comes to fuck people's shit up
>Pirate ghosts all over the fucking shore
>ancestor spirits probably pissed that all the Indians died to smallpox
Time to become a cleric. Good thing this state is full of Catholics.
>>47512441
This guy gets it.
>>47510309
>Somerset
As long as you stay away from Wookey Hole, you'll be fine. Hell, our local Black Dog, the Gurt Dog, is a pretty friendly beast. Watches over kids playing in the Quantocks.
Although we may have some problems with Gwyn ap Nudd leading the Wild Hunt out of Glastonbury Tor.
>Nobody realizing that this act would make the gods real too.
ISIS would kill us all. It would be like Patapon but with Mudslimes and that really cool "Ay ah yah ay atta atta ya oh so to no nananana" sound. You know. This one.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lxo9iEX8W1c
>>47512858
Damn sight better than here. We have some hairy hands that'll crash your car, I guess.
>>47510309
Brazilian folklore is mostly indigenous beliefs we learn in school. I don't remember much, but i'ts mostly some forest demons that kill wanderers, so i guess i wouldn't be too fucked.
>Boitata is a giant fire snake that burns those who try to harm the jungle
>Corpo-seco is a corpse that was rejected by the earth for striking his mother and now kills people for reasons.
>Curupira is a demon that has his feet backwards so to confuse hunters. Indigenous people believed they had to make him offers not to anger him.
>Mula sem cabeça is a roastie that slept with a priest and turned into a mule with fire where it's head should be
>>47512941
And big cats.
>>47510309
Oregon.....its either bigfoot or wendigos. Im hoping bigfoot considering.
I'm in Australia and our Aboriginal legends are so fucking spooky that they made a Call of Cthulu supplement for it. I'm boned.
Scandinavian here other than the shit that will kill you our folklore is pretty funny , having to say lookout every time you go to the toilet so you don't accidently shit on a vittra that will be mightly pissed.
>>47513248
Also people up north will still move their house if they think it was built on a vittra trail so as not to anger them
>>47512441
Bigfoot is not, in fact, real. Please do not worry when camping in the pacific northwest and feel free to eat lots of fatty foods when doing so.
>>47513074
Ausfag here
Aboriginal stories are weird man... i havent heard many but 90% of them involve a mystical rainbow snake and the other 10% make little sense.
I dont know of any particularly spooky ones but i can see how some would fit in to coc
How do you think one tribe believed kangaroos got their tails?
Would 'two roos fighting with spears lodging each others spear in each others backside' have been what you thought?
Also bunyips
[Spoiler] and drop bears [/spoiler]
>>47513248
Essentially surviving Swedish folklore is to follow the mantra of lagom
>>47513074
Mind sharing with Mississippi Man? I love to learn about other countries and their culture.
Southeast Alaska here. Everything is either a shape changing kidnapper or a shape changing mentor that will teach you great power by kidnapping you and hitting you until you get strong enough to fight back.
>>47510309
North Carolinian here. About a dozen ghost pirates are gonna be ten minutes away from my house
Ireland.
So, fairies. Irritating underground faggots with no sense of right and wrong. Probably get another race of mythical warriors coming in to colonize the place since that is pretty much the entirety of Irish mythology. And if it isn't fairies, it's ghosts spooking you.
That's it, lads, fairies, ghosts and foreigners.
I'd move to Canada, I'd rather deal with a wendigo and sasquatch than having to deal with fucking fairies again.
>>47512215
As a dyed in the wool Mainer, I'm afraid you're going to have to fight us for custody of Paul Bronyan.
>>47510432
Scand elves were mellow as long as you were polite to them
As an Albertan, I'd really just have to live out the mythological belief held by the rest of Canada that Alberta is a giant tailings pond filled with shitty, inbred, subhumans. So it's really not that far to go.
>>47511015
It's called awife
>>47514542
Not even Canada is free of awful monsters and spirits, once you start accounting for aboriginal lore beyond its most popular, well-known creatures.
>>47510309
>turns all mythological beings real
Fate/Grand Order: World War edition
Here comes the snow!
Well, I'm in Michigan, so there'll be packs of werewolves just roaming around every where, a bigfoot behind every other tree. Aliens would be regulars at bars and restaurants. Every hitchiker would actually be a ghost with a fifty fifty chance of being harmless or murdering your shit.
But the real danger? All those fucking mystical ax murders.
I'm in Ohio, so we'd get giant hairless bear/mammoth monsters, ghost wolves, enormous aquatic serpents with antlers, massive amphibious panthers, winged men who cause storms, an assortment of human ghosts, the melonheads.... and that's about the worst of it. Not all bad, considering. At least we don't have wendigos or mylings.
>>47515937
>mylings
How are those as bad as Wendigos?
>>47510309
Well, for one, George Washington would probably come back to life as a demigod, along with American anthropic personifications like Columbia, Justice, Lady Luck / Miss Fortune.
We'd also have to deal with the devil in his various guises, whether that be the sharp dressed city slicker, the old blind man in the swamp, or the cowled forest figure.
Then there's all that cryptozoology stuff, aliens and the like, not to mention Native folklore and mythology.
I also live in Texas, so we might get bleed over from whatever is left of Mexican/Aztec mythology.
>>47512896
Wouldn't that just bring the creator god into existence, and have him schizophrenically fighting himself as YHWH, God, Allah, and so on and so forth?
I wonder what the Greek gods would think of the modern age, or their Roman names.
>>47515980
Ask me that again when a gigantic undead baby is crushing you to death as you struggle to carry it to a graveyard.
>Founding Fathers all get reborn as enlightenment supermen who have achieved Apotheosis
Watch out, rest of the world, here comes America!
U S A
U S A
U S A
>>47516110
I doubt your founding fathers would start shit abroad when they have so much work to do at home.
>>47516152
Please, clearing up all the misunderstandings, and clearing up all the traitors and corrupt officials, would take but a week and a half.
>>47516190
On the other hand, reinstituting slavery would take a few more.
>>47516200
>implying most of the founding fathers were diehard pro-slavery
That division ran deep in America the second the first slave set foot in the colonies, not just when the civil war was gearing up.
>>47516011
>>47516110
>>47516152
>>47516190
Guys. Think about it. Where we'd go we wouldn't need a big stick.
>florida
>love bugs as genetic experiments let loose.
>swamp men.
>no really, swamp homnids.
>Pirates
>Southern John Henry
But then add in the Fountain of Youth, and I'm all game let's fucking do this!
>>47516254
How does that matter much compared to normal Florida?
let's see, talking animals, squirrel like creatures that drug people with lichen, some booze loving logging spirit that will kill new loggers who fail to offer tribute, cougar that has a flesh mace on its tail and lures people into the woods by talking like a person so it can bludgeon them with it and eat them.
A lot of haunted lighthouses, A lake monster or two, some possible viking mythology bleeding over, Paul Bunyan(other states can fuck off, he was born here), and a well that apparently drove someone insane when they were lowered into it.
Let's not forget the apparent demon that lives in the woods just across the border.
>>47510309
would that mean that us regular humans would be able to cast magic? Seeing how now magic exists.
>>47516242
Most of them owned slaves and didn't free those slaves upon their death, so yeah, I think it didn't bother them too much.
>>47516253
>all the presidents (and founding fathers) who have been dead / out of office long enough to have a sufficient mythology/persona developed around them are suddenly revitalized, taking on their popular American attributes
>Hamilton immediately starts arguing with Jefferson
>Jackson gets rightfully pissed about both him being on a federal reserve note, and being replaced by a black woman on a federal reserve note
>Nixon immediately stars spitting fire about all the shit modern politicians are getting away with, while he had to resign for just wiretapping
Lets fucking do this
>>47516254
Dude. Look into the myths of the Seminole. You're going to get fucked by shadow-men that drive you insane, giant spectral owls who eat hearts, and plague wolves.
>>47516284
...Wisconsin?
>mythology
>vampires
Wait so does Christopher Lee come back to life, forced to stop this nap, and or is forced to show his true colors as Dracula? What kind of vampiric powers would he get? Old school or modern?
>>47516348
We need this in real life. Then I can meet my favorite presidents.
Wait if the dead presidents come back that means JFK will be OP.
>>47516283
Uh, I get to look fit af while laughing at attractive morons in those headlines?
Florida is like living another dimension mate, you kinda just roll with it.
>>47516428
I mean, if we're talking mythical vampires and not Hollywood vampires, people in your neighborhood are just going to start mysteriously dying. What country do you live in?
>>47516445
How long does the rolling take?
>>47516452
Freedom Land. I think I'll be fine for a while.
>>47516397
Nope Maine
>>47516472
Yeah, vampires aren't a big thing in American myths and legends. There's plenty of local horrors to worry about before they start spreading outside of immigrant communities.
>>47516472
I personally got adjusted overnight, but I guess that's just because I was mentally out there to begin with.
The best way I can describe it is its like the fallout cloud of crazy from the Bermuda Triangle just covers Florida completely, and the only thing that combats it is city smog.
>>47516510
I'm surprised that Native Americans don't have vampires. Do they have vampires?
>>47516522
The smog sounds like its overworked.
>>47516555
They have skinwalkers. Infinitely more terrifying.
>>47516555
>I'm surprised that Native Americans don't have vampires. Do they have vampires?
Just witches I think. Pretty sure there is something that drinks blood in the South West. not the chupecabra or w/e but something that drinks people blood.
>>47516589
Skinwalkers are just shapeshifters who know when you talk about them, and talking about them empowers them right? I can't remember my skinwalker facts sadly, so please forgive my total ignorance.
>>47516623
Witches are close enough.
>>47516589
Only the Navajo have skinwalkers, and they're mostly just shapeshifting shamans who are dicks.
Other tribes have things that are as bad or worse than vampires, though. Wendigos. Stikini. The Hecesiiteihii. Bukwus. The Baykok. Raven Mockers. The Stonecoats. The Nalusa Falaya. The list goes on.
>>47516640
>>47516655
Skinwalkers can/will fuck you up in horrific ways just for shits and giggles. Like, really fuck you up.
They'll also disguise themselves and ask about the skinwalker legend so they can enjoy the fear. Just like you... Oh fuck.
>>47516655
>Stonecoats
That doesn't sound too bad.
>>47516681
So they're the Fair Folk but Native American flavored?
>>47516703
I'll be honest, I'm a little hazy, but from memory, what >>47516655 said is pretty accurate, except they're far more sinister than that portrayal.
>>47510364
>skinwalkers
>>47516730
How much sinister? Also did some googling and two of those things doesn't sound bad. Baykok is just the Grim Reaper, and Hecesiitehii are just canabal dorfs.
>>47516681
Damnit, /x/, stop making Skinwalkers out to be more than they are. They're just Sorcerers whoa assume animal shap to fuck you up, like oldschool werewolves.
>>47516703
Skinwalkers are decidedly human in origin. Native American have other Fair Folk equivalents. Point in fact, the Stonecoats would be some sort of Unseelie. They're a race of shapeshifters or illusionists who appear human, but whose true form is humanoid monster with fangs and overlapping stone plates for skin. They have a variety of abilities, with each individual usually exercising some ability to seek out humans and to control stone. They eat human livers and are very, very clever about how to get at their favorite food.
>>47516776
I was talking about skinwalkers. Asshole shapeshifting shamans with no morals and a gigantic dose of sadism is the best summary I can give. The creep factor comes from them being anyone or anything.
>>47510364
Nah, we got shit like the early American version of Rawhead and Bloody Bones. A giant bloody hog skeleton in overalls that walks like a man, carries a shotgun, and really hates hunters. Pro tip: never shoot and eat a witch's pet hog. They don't like it when you do that.
>>47510309
>live in nz
>nz becomes an island full of beasts and tree spirits
Fuck, I guess I sell my soul as soon as possible to get some sort of divine power and then stay the fuck away from rivers.
>>47516776
Cannibal dorfs who can fly, have super speed, and are superhumanly strong. According to the legends of the Great Plains tribes, they murdered their way through the native population until all the tribes united to drive them back to the Rocky Mountains, supposedly exterminating them.
It's a very ASoI&F setup, with the ancient horrible monsters driven back beyond an impassable landmark by an ancient alliance, and supposedly killed off. But deep in the mountain caverns, something stirs...
>>47516787
Stone giant fair folk does sound pretty horrific.
>>47516798
In other words they're /tg/ playing wizards using the "no sense of right and wrong meme".
>>47516807
So Bloody Bones is the skelly? I can't remember.
>>47516807
Shit yeah, American Rawhead is hardcore. He steals bits and pieces from other dead animals so now he's a patchwork monstrosity with the claws of a bear, among other weapons.
>>47516787
>Damnit, /x/
Also /k/ they're scared about skinwalkers cus /x/ convinced them they're all thespoopyshit they've seen outinnawoodsall rolled into one.
>>47516845
The creepy That Guys with the torture fetish part of /tg/, but yeah, pretty much.
I'm probably over-blowing them since they're the only mythological thing that actually scares the crap out of of me.
>>47516834
Okay now I'm spooked. I hate to see their tantrum spirals.
>>47516765
I wouldn't worry about it.
>>47516845
British Bloody Bones is a nightmarish boogeyman who abducts and eats children. Pic related.
American Bloody Bones is an undead monster summoned from the corpse of a witch's prize pig after hunters killed it, and now her creations stalks the woods of the American south killing anyone it meets.
>>47516884
Now I'm just imaging Virt here.
>>47516909
I don't know which one is worse. Who's Rawhead?
>Nalusa Falaya
>Chickasaw mythology
>mfw
Welp there goes Mississippi Man's luck.
>>47517011
Forgot to add Choctaw.
>>47516942
The creature's names in both versions is "Rawhead and Bloody Bones." Calling them just "Rawhead" or "Bloody Bones" is an abbreviation.
>>47517011
Nope he likes being stuck with the weird, thorn-like stinger of a mysterious shadow creature, magically turning him into a psychopath.
>>47517087
Bloody Bones sounds much better.
>>47517101
I am him. My first idea is either putting crosses all over the state.
>>47516845
>So Bloody Bones is the skelly?
Rawhead and Bloody Bones is the full name of the skeletal hog. Its name was Rawhead while it was alive, and once it was raised its body was made of bloody bones, thus "Rawhead and Bloody Bones".
>He steals bits and pieces from other dead animals so now he's a patchwork monstrosity with the claws of a bear, among other weapons.
Oh fuck, I completely forgot about that part. Yeah, and a raccoon's tail and some other shit thrown in there for good measure.
>>47517145
>I am him. My first idea is either putting crosses all over the state.
Hey, just stay out of the pine woods at dusk, you should be fine. Although... the legends about the Nalusa Falaya are vague about the effect of his "thorn" on people. Usually they just say people marked by the thorn are made to "do evil." This is making me look at the infamous "Florida Man" behavior detailed here: >>47516283 in a new light.
>>47517238
>Oh fuck, I completely forgot about that part. Yeah, and a raccoon's tail and some other shit thrown in there for good measure.
And that was back shortly after his creation. He's been wandering the US for decades now. Imagine what he looks like now, if he's been adding to/replacing his rotting bits over the years, seeking out the best parts to make him more deadly.
>>47517238
He sounds more like something from deviantArt, or something from a movie.
>>47517251
I live in a sort of wooded area where the closest town is five to 15 minutes away. Either I need a moat of fire or a moat of crosses here, Anon.
>>47510309
Does America even have amy positive mythos? All our legends are about hauntings, demons, and some flavor of bipedal swamp monster/lizard monster. I only know of Southeastern legends though.
I guess there's Hogzilla, but seeing as he is real he doesn't count.
>>47517335
>I live in a sort of wooded area where the closest town is five to 15 minutes away. Either I need a moat of fire or a moat of crosses here, Anon.
Unfortunately, the legends don't mention any particular way to ward him off. Stay away from swamps, too. Ignis Fatuus lights are supposed to be his children, presumably some sort of larval stage.
>>47517390
He can't hide in the forest if there's a fire burning it all down.
>>47517379
Oh, sure. Old Stormalong, Johnny Appleseed, John Henry, various positive Native American mythical beings like the Nunnehi, that sort of thing. And then there are some mythical beings that are not necessarily good or bad, like the Knockers or the Thunderbirds. Cyclone Person was supposed to be a pretty-stand up guy, at least to the Shawnee.
>>47516011
>>47516110
This is actually pretty fucking awesome. Didn't TG used to have a setting where something like this happened?
>>47517379
Positive myths are kind of rare everywhere. Even the ones that seem good on the surface end up being kind of sinister after some thought.
>>47517433
Well, he's a living shadow. He's described as slithering along the ground like a snake. He might live in the woods, but there's no guarantee he HAS to stay there. If you burn them down, maybe he'll come to live at your place.
>>47517441
There was one setting made where it was civil war vets vs things that go bump in the middle of the night in Freedom Land.
>>47517458
What would happen if you shine light at him for an extended period of time?
Fellow Kiwi!
Wow, we would pretty much not be safe any where outside of a city.
>>47514542
>again
wat
Wait wouldn't Aussies have to deal with giant Komodo Dragons in the outback too now?
>>47517558
>implying those were legendary
Why would native legends come back if they are all dead
>>47517515
>What would happen if you shine light at him for an extended period of time?
Good question. Although he's often referred to as a shadow, it's unclear if he's an actual shadow or a physical creature that just likes to hide in shadows.
>>47517680
...they aren't? There are still sizable populations of Native Americans throughout the country. Also, OP didn't say the return of the legends was predicated on the people who believed them still being alive.
>>47517707
They are less than a percent and are mostly in the west coast. Also it's not a local legend if the people that made are dead or no longer living there
>>47517335
¿Why not both? The kkk probably could hook you up with bulk distributors.
>>47517558
... Don't they already?
>>47512398
The Lambton worm is a dragon, or at least the British version. Most British dragons are things called Knuckers, essentially giant aquatic snake/eel monsters. They usually don't breathe fire, instead they spit out poison or breathe poisonous fumes. Their blood is also frequently poisonous, killing if it's absorbed through the skin. They attack by constricting, and can often regenerate from wounds, even re-attaching severed body sections. That's why the knight who killed the Lambton Worm did so in a flowing river while wearing a suit of armor covered in blades: the worm wrapped around him, cutting itself to pieces on the blades (and helped along by his sword) and then the river swept the pieces away so they couldn't rejoin.
>>47517684
The logical thing would to be to test that with a flamethrower on stand by.
>>47517756
Some people think Megalainas are still kicking in the Land Down Under so they probably would become more common. As for the KKK thing I'm not the cross burning type. However a metal cross that shoots out fire would be way cooler.
>>47517756
Abos killed them all while destroying the original environment.
It was grasslands and forests when they first got there. Now it is one large desert with a rain forest in the north coast
>>47517734
In that case we wouldn't be getting many elves or dragons or whatever either. The people who live in those places now don't believe in those things, and haven't for a long, long time.
All OP said was that legends are made real, then asked how screwed we are based on the legends of our local areas. If all legends are made real, including the legends of mythical Native American creatures, those creatures will presumably pop up in their usual haunts, not on the reservation.
>>47517828
Europeans still live in Europe despite the memes anon
>>47517847
Those people have very little in common with the people who once believed in those legendary critters, and they don't believe in them anymore. Hell, even European ethnic groups and cultures have moved around a fair bit since the old days. It's not like their mythical creatures would necessarily pop up where they are, based on your criteria.
We also can't forget that music mythology comes to life, Elvis actually appears again here and there, the blues devil waits at the crossroads or challenges musicians to musical battles, Lemmy actually is a God I guess.
>>47517944
>the blues devil waits at the crossroads
Old Scratch is going to be popping up all over the US.
>>47517847
Nobody I know of believes in elves, King Arthur/Camelot, or any of those other things, despite being descended from the people who did.
If it was only things that people still believe in, the thermal properties of jet fuel would change, and aliens would start cropping up. That's about it.
>Stephen Colbert actually becomes all the thongs Stephen Colbert has said about himself.
I for one welcome our new Emporer of Mankind.
Speaking of, honorable mentions:
Kanye West
Chuck Fucking Norris
Mr. T
Santa
Mr. Rogers
Freddie Mercury
Marilyn Monroe
Ron Jeremy
I looked at the word too long and now I don't remember how to spell emprah properly.
>>47516871
/k/ isn't as scared of them, they more want to hunt them with their mosins.
>>47514542
> Probably get another race of mythical warriors coming in to colonize the place since that is pretty much the entirety of Irish mythology
Isn't that also the entirety of Irish history?
>>47511312
isn't that a silent consensus in Bong-land?
if King Arthur ever did come back and the Legend was true, that everyone would pledge him King?
>>47518067
There's a Mordred in every Camelot.
>>47518067
I mean I'm an republican (in the classical sense) American with absolutely no connection to Bongistan, and I'd support Arthur's return.
>>47510309
>I'm Scandinavian. I'd probably wander into a nearby forest and try to make friends with some elves.
And then get brutally murdered by a Troll, Huldra, Nokken or some other horrible creature.
>>47517892
Genetic studies show that people in the U.K are the same people that lived there thousands of years ago down to the exact tribes
>>47518136
All those Normans just vanished into the ether, then?
>>47518171
They didn't actually breed with the population and most of them went back to France. You should read the latest genetic studies
>>47518171
Nah, the people conducting the study got really lucky and managed to choose all the vampires in England. The odds of this happening are quite large, and when written out they actually resemble a phone number. A phone number which just so happens to work and connects to a rather queer young lady.
>>47514796
Nissar aren't elves tho
>>47517828
Sweden would be plagued by folklore monsters since many still believe in them.
My life would become less of a chore since nissar would clean my house as long as i gave em food sometimes and the trolls would probably wittle down the muslims since islam is christianity warlord edition
>>47510309
Living in Russia, depends.
If we get only national myths and fairytales, our stuff isn't really malicious: we get house elfs just like Finns, some mermaids that will fuck your children up if you let them near water, maybe a forest hobo spirit to confuse you when you're in the forest.
It's the USSR-related shit that's pretty scary. First Lenin will arise from his mausoleum as a wax-lich-thing and try to lead all the old men to overthrow the government, then Stalin will arive from the past using a time machine, murder Lenin in cold blood and re-establish all the stuff he did, etc.etc.
Russia. Our myths and gods have been mostly lost after christianity took over. There is quite a bit of boring shit like domovoi, there are mermaids (without fish parts, by the way, they are simply undead girls that live in the water), I guess there are ghouls or zombies (upyr), there's one lich and one dragon, but nothing exciting overall.
>>47519163
Hello there, comrade, nice to see another russian on this board. Did you know about poludnitsa - a mythical woman, who will kill you, if you work too hard? I think she sums up our nation pretty well.
>>47510309
I live in Missouri so the the only mythological beings that become real are niggers that really didn't do nuffin
>>47510309
I'm in the Netherlands so apart from all the generic western European folk myths we'd only get some bearded guy who brings presents every year, so overall we arent really fucked
>>47519185
There's some neat stuff in bogatyr myths (Tugarin Zmeyevich, Gorynych, Koschei etc) although you're right there's not a lot surviving information.
My favorite obscure-r creature from russian myth gotta be pharaonkas, undead mermaids who are descendants of the Egyptian warriors who drowned in the Red Sea. Pretty spoopy if you ask me
Well I live in North Carolina so we'll be overrun by transexual child molesters.
>>47516884
Speaking as someone who regularly plays with one of... Those guys, I can assure you they aren't a myth much to my grave displeasure.
Anyway, I probably die when the Flayed One leads Mexico on the warpath through the United States. Only to end up in hell where I find that the Devil has been kicked out of office by... ol' Hickory himself. Then to make it even worse, Colonel Jackson orders me to duel him or else face damnation.
>>47511312
Are you sure that would be halal my friend?
Living in the Basque Country we couldnt go out at night due to evil night spirits kidnaping people with the pretext of "Day for the people of the day, night for the night beings". Plus giants such as Lords of the Woods (Basajaun) and "Jentiles", and other pesky critters of nature
>>47516833
Amen
>Taniwha aint no joke
>>47516190
>week and a half
>not a fortnight or a score
You had ONE job.
Living in the Basque Country we couldnt go out at night due to evil night spirits kidnaping people with the pretext of "Day for the people of the day, night for the night beings". Plus giants such as Lords of the Woods (Basajaun) and "Jentiles", and other pesky critters of nature such as imps wearing red pants that can undo anything and do anything, and let us nit forget a goddes (named Mari, Amari or The Lady of Anboto in vasque) that if you turn your back to her transforms you inti stone.
>Wisconsin.
Well I'm not brushed up on Ojibwe, Hochunk other local tribes mythology, but I guess Hodags add another predator to the food chain and to the list of things to shoot in the woods after a couple Old Milwaukees
>>47519218
Anon-comrade! That description was extremely lacking. You should have clarified that poludnitsas will kill you if you work too hard in midday in the field, and were an attempt to explain sunstrokes.
I think I have to add that Russian workers in Ural had a distinct folklore of their own, which praised honesty and hard work; just read Ural tales by Bazhov. I absolutely loved them as a kid.
According to my local nut job, the nazis would arrive from hollow earth tunnels in Antarctica flying giant UFOs that shoot lasers and would quickly overwhelm our modern armies.
The one true King Elvis will return.
TFW Italy
TFW absolutely nothing apart some pesky critters
time to get comfy
The forests, rivers and lakes are now filled with nymphs and satyrs.
The old gods reawaken.
It's still pretty comfy except for goblins trying to cut the world tree every year and the wicked dead or those not given their final rites coming back from the grave to kill and spread fear and disease.
>>47510474
Missisisipi river would be a perfect hunting spot for a Doonegaes/mishipeshu in the region i live in it is said that they could turn the very water they reside in into incurable poison. and are capable of taking the form of any human they have killed.
MFW Sweden
MFW enticed by Skogsrå only to be sucked dry
MFW fishing in the river only to be dragged down into the water and drowned by bäckahästen
MFW going across the baltic only to have my ship destroyed by sea serpents and get drowned by draugr
MFW going to be and Mare sits on my chest clawing at me and inducing nightmares
MFW I didn't respect the nisse so he burnt down my house
MFW I didn't say look out when taking a dump so I accidently shat on a vittra and he orcestrated my death
I would totally want swedish folklore to be real just so I could have a nisse clean my house and go watch some beautiful not evil mermaids play in the water.
>>47510982
I like how you escalate it from "burn your shit","summon demons", "eat your children" to "eat your food" in the end.
>>47520346
Ahem-ahem. Roman gods.
Croatia, so Slavic mythos
Id probably be cast from my home by one of 20 kinda of house ghosts and wander into a swamp where a one eyed grandma who turns into cats would jump on my head and attempt to drown me in the swamp water as Koschei the Deathless lich prince high fives Triglav and Svarog and Morgana and whoever the Fuck god
>>47510309
Australia.
Rainbow spirit will take white fella into wallalambugi country dreamtime to huff petrol.
>>47510364
Lovecraft is Murrican. So while Ragnarok ravages the north and the End of Days tears open the middle-east we will have the Old Ones marching across the plains.
>>47520346
> Italy
> safe
Roman gods, catholic fucking everything, vampires, demons. Have fun.
>the American dream becomes real and attainable for everyone
Well hot digity. I'd go out and get myself an unskilled job I can raise a family on and research how to keep the super natural from fucking my shot up.
Aside from Sleepy Hollow's headless horseman, what does New York get?
>>47518067
Of course. Though if Greece got it's giant statue of Emperor Constantine the eleventh and rebuilt the Roman Empire, I'd have to go join up with them.
>France
Dragons, fairies, lutins, witches and all that everywhere. I would be fucked so hard.
>>47521560
you got Tarrasque you are fucked Pierre
Oh yeah, Frederick Barbarossa will return to save Germania and the "holy" "roman" "empire".
I wonder how he'll do against arab myths when he kicks them out of yurope.
>>47514542
>Probably get another race of mythical warriors coming in to colonize the place since that is pretty much the entirety of Irish mythology.
If you're lucky, Fionn mac Cumhaill will also revive from his sealed cave to fight them back.
>>47521582
arabs will use efreet to blow up Europe
>>47521560
>English flags over the horizon off the northern coast
Let's hope Joan can rouse the might of france
>>47521560
Don't forget giant Boars and the Dahu.
>>47521594
Impervious to conventional weaponry, but Yurope has many mythological magic users to call upon.
>>47521617
yeah just fuckin unleash bigass jormungadr
>>47518067
Our royal family are pretty shit right now so yeah, fuck it.
>>47510309
Ghosts and lares, lares and ghosts.
And some god-touched prophets and champions.
In the fullness of time, Plouton himself will beget 4 scions, to keep the uppity ghosts & lares at bay.
>>47521021
So, from what I understand, nothing changes for you ozzies right?
>>47518067
what? just cause some watery tart threw a sword at him?
that's no basis for a system of government!
>>47520346
Well, there will be vampire-bitten saints fighting old gods in the form of rams who've been tempted by devils to rape ghost-possessed young brides, but other than that it wiill be business as normal.
If it goes right, we might even end up with a Jupiter-born ruling class.
>mfw a fuckton of REAL vampires
>>47510309
>California
Literally nobody living knows what folklore used to be here.
I guess all that changes is now vaccines cause autism.
>>47520749
That's a big deal if you live in the frozen north and need food to get through the winter.
>>47522123
>eat a slice of pizza
>sprinkle some garlic on
>free to walk around at night
it's a sjame this thread died
I'm pretty sure all I've got to deal with is John Henry, the mothman, and the flat woods monster. West Virginia is pretty tame, unless I'm missing some shit.
>>47522815
>West Virginia is pretty tame, unless I'm missing some shit.
Deliverance-lite and heavy inbreeding.
I am spanish so nothing changes.
Except we made death have a male harem. A huge harem.
>>47522864
That's not a myth. All the movies put shit to an extreme, but it's there. I think Odd West Virginia is one of those places that has a family of inbred fucks. Never been there, but I've heard there's a family that will bark at you and chase after your car. They'd probably eat you too, but them damn auto-mo-biles is faster then hell.
I would have to deal with this asshole
>>47510309
I'm from Serbia. That same night when the wizard does his stuff, i am found horribly disfigured, emacieted, drained of blood, drowned, quartered, burned, maimed, and dead. Not in that order.
>>47510309
Germanfag here, I me some ghosts in the hills and shit in the woods that loves human meat. Oh and dragons and dwarves. Fun stuff all around, unless you want to grow old.
Lets see, my bit of bongland has a hard on for ettins and trolls. Also standard elves, dwaves and english dragons. Deurgar are evil/mischievous dwarves that live in bogs.
We'd get brownies though so that seems pretty cool, also all the saints with borderline superhero powers that vowed to someday raise from the dead.
>>47510309
Where I live no longer exists as it has swum off until such time Maui and his brothers come by and drop an anchor, leave their canoe, kill a ray and butcher it into mountains.
>Be in Louisiana
>Never ever go innaswamp ever again
I ain't gonna get my face eaten by a rougarou. And I guess I better start keeping sticks under my bed to trick Tainted Ketrie. And I'll have to go bribe the local witch-doctor with a bottle of rum so the Loa don't hate me.
>>47519303
Underrated post
>>47521707
Just got to watch out for Crow. Crow wont fuck you over over hate but because it was all a prank mate.
>>47523118
So no difference?
>>47510309
At first there isn't much difference with the rest of western Europe. Then, about one year from now, the annual town celebration goes awry as the dragon Saint George symbollically kills every year actually comes back and we have to hide while good ol' George and/or the local NATO base try to get rid of it. Starting from now, it happens every year.
Also we've got a saint's head in our main church so that would be pretty awesome, miraculously curing illnesses and all that. Except if we don't manage to put the head back in the church during the aforementionned yearly celebration (because it's in a super heavy cart and we have to make it climb the town's steepest street), then we would be even more fucked.
There's probably some other stuff happening but that would be the most important.
Also a town not too far from mine is protected by a saint who apparently can turn into a bear so that's pretty awesome.
>>47510309
>Be Jew
>God has no form
>Only few old prophets who died before dinosaurs were here
>NoEffect.jpg
>Feels good man
>>47522815
>mishipeshu
Look into Native myths. It'll be similar to what's in Ohio, lots of horned serpents and what not.
>>47521042
I love it. Always wanted to see one of those mind warping entities.
>>47514705
Fuck, I live in NH, all we got are native American skelly bros and ghost caves.
Maine getting all the good shit like usual.
>>47513320
Waaait a minute...
I'd say at this point Jack the Ripper has become a myth/legend. Can we get some clarification on him, OP?
Which myths would cancel each other out? Would a different vision of the same person or monster cancel it out, or would they fuse to become much more powerful?
>>47521796
So you're saying they sent /sci/? They don't do anything useful.
>>47516253
>Delighted!
>>47524759
Seeing Teddy in his fully powered state is something to be delighted about.
>>47521343
>Women become subservient and truly are inferior to men in every way.
While I regret the loss of real women, I am glad to be rid of the dickless feminazis. The remaining few should get eaten by Lizardman in short order.
>>47521499
Ten pin playing fae that like to knock your ass out for 40 years after they drunk with you. Um aside from that? We get half of Champy if Vermont isnt being a bunch of cunts.
>Bulgaria
Shape-shifting dragons which like to steal or seduce humans of the opposite sex. Samovilas which might fuck you to death. Vampires. The boogeyman that steals kids in his sack. Phoenixes.
And a bunch of other stuff I dont remember.
New Jersey here, jersey devil would probably fuck me up one night
>>47524209
That reminds me, Springheel Jack is a thing. Did I get that right? Which in return reminds me of Candle Ja
>>47510309
Michigan
There Wendigos, water spirits, skinwalkers, all forms of dire animals, lots of wood elves, dwarf colony in the UP, and probably cthulu in one of the lakes.
>>47510309
>Aztec
>Chaos gods from 40k that aren't as dickish.
>>47523982
That just means you have no protection from anywhere else's shit.
Very soon homeless because of shit like >>47510784 . After that I could probably start doing pretty well, though, as long as I was polite to strangers of every kind, left regular offerings to home gnomes and didn't fall on the ground. Actually, it might be best to start looking up how no to piss off any spirits, otherwise I might end up trapped in a mirrored forest realm or something like that.
Väinämöinen's return would be pretty baller though.
And I should get a pet grass snake to keep the livestock healthy.
>>47525045
One a side note, this would also mean Revelation starting, and the second coming of christ, and all that jazz. We would be fucked
Ukraine.
I instantly get murderfucked by undead girls by walking to close to a river, forest, plain, swamp any type of terrain except human habitat. Sometimes they dont eat you instantly, but force to live with them making escape impossible by utilizing some space bending magic so you always come back to them.
Oh and a house spirit. He probably allready knows all my porn fetishes.
>>47510309
>Huntsville
>GOATMAN
Shit.
>Norwegian
>Trolls and giants everywhere
Which place is going to get hit the hardest with all of the spooks? Just how much changes now that mythology is now real and out for blood?
>>47525375
All of them. Its easier to think about which place is gonna hurt less.
>>47525375
Greeks might experience a sudden rise in sexual assault cases. They'll just chalk it up to boat niggers though.
>>47525375
Well, I sure for shit wouldn't want to live in Central America.
>>47525406
What if niggers voodoistic gods arise? What if native american bloodhungry gods arise?
Greeks rape and alcoholic stupor is probably not that bad.
>>4752543
Voodoo loa are pretty chill as long as they have enough booze
>>47525434
Well, Africa is already a literal shithole that is only really liveable the Chinese have enslaved the niggers. Like, making Africa even shittier is pretty fucking difficult.
>>47525434
I really dont know enough about the various african belief systems.
Japan would be a weird place to live though, with all the eyeball-anus ghosts n stuff.
But wait...
Jesus will be back too!
>>47525511
Deus Vult time?
>>47525489
Don't forget your flipflops turning into spooky ghosts.
>>47525511
Holy shit, DEUS VULT. We could finally be rid of the Muzzies.
>>47525544
but JESUS will be back...
he'll change water into purple juice and wash their feet.
>>47525544
I just have one question. Will the dress code be great helms, sallets, or closed helms?
>>47525024
Springheel Jack is Jack the Ripper, IIRC.
>>47525183
>>47525045
You don't have skinwalkers in Michigan. They're a southwest thing.
>>47525559
Mythological figure, who is mutated by what those who believe in it think. Between the Orthodoxy and the majority of America's Christians and a majority of Catholics who hate the Cuck Pope, means we're getting ourselves some fire and brimstone. Fucker's gonna come back like Urban II.
lets make a worldbuilding about the rise of the old mhytos
>>47525223
Don't forget the vampires.
>no-one mentions all the horrifying, nearly ubiquitous children's myths
>cooties
>monsters in your room
>insane things local to school districts
>>47525414
>Hey everyone, the sun will explode if you don't start killing huge numbers of people RIGHT NOW. Better get on that. And remember, each god wants a different kind of horrific sacrifice.
