>You have just saved the kingdom from the evil wizard.
>In honor of your service, the King has offered you his daughter's hand in marriage
>While you do not hate her, for some reason or another you do not wish to marry her.
How do you get out of this? Or is it better to like back and think of (your country here)
>>46679254
>lie back
>>46679254
I tell the truth. I'm a wanderer and a scoundrel at heart, and the princess's hand should be saved for a better man than I.
>>46679254
Make it a marriage of convenience, as most royal marriages were. Allow the Lady Queen to have those suitors she wishes, with the understanding that you are not enemies, and might even be amiable to one another.
Call on my chum the Dragon.
He's been in the business of Princess re-allocation for years.
>>46679254
>while you do not hate her
is their a specific reason i dont want to marry her? Is she ugly? Does she have a shitty personality? Am i in live with another woman? Those all influence .y decision.
>>46679254
>While you do not hate her, for some reason or another you do not wish to marry her
>While you do not hate her
Get out of here normie
>How do you get out of this?
By not being a fucking normie.
The setting has an explicit disconnect between love and marriagejust like real life for most of history.So yes, I will marry the Emperor's daughter. Because that's so much better than whatever political marriage I was going to eventually negotiate that it's not even funny.
>>46679254
Well, I accept the marriage assuming the king is willing to raise me up to a suitable rank to marry such a person.
I then explain to her that I intend to continue my life much as before, as it was in adventuring I made my name and thus this is the field in which I excel. While I will spend plenty of time at home, I will also quest to keep my skills sharp and ensure my reputation is intact, as to do otherwise would not befit a man of my status.
Then I enjoy a comfy as fuck home life and do what and who ever I want when Im on quests
>>46679254
Suck it up, marry the princess, learn to love your wife after the marriage the way everyone else in a society with arranged marriages does.
What if I'm playing a female character?
>>46679254
I tell the DM I'm fine with being a henchmen and he doesn't have to keep forcing shit like this on me when the bard and the wizard are over chomping at the bit for story hooks.
>>46679758
Then history will remember you as a man, most likely? I mean, he offered you his daughters hand, apparently you did something great enough hes decided your gender is irrelevant but history will decide you're a dude to cover over the ''awkwardness''
>>46679254
Tell the king that I am a wandering adventurer. That is my life, and so if I shall marry any woman, it would have to be one who is willing to risk her life wandering and adventuring with me.
That, or just marry her, and get a big political ace in my back pocket (plus great perks when returning home). Just as long as Kingie is aware that I'm still adventuring and not sitting down into some nobility once married.
>>46679758
Give her the dick.
>>46679804
Guess I enjoy my new wife then.
>>46679815
I feel like that's going to require me to delve into some deep jungle temple for some ridiculously shaped artifact.
On the bright side, I'll have kids.
>>46679758
Maybe you were offered the prince instead?
>>46680000
OP said princess. No take backs.
>>46680023
i dont know man, quads might put take backs on the table.
>>46680043
For you maybe, but not for me.
>>46679254
That princess has a largest rack I've ever seen and my character hunts deer for a living, I don't understand why I wouldn't be all over this.
>>46679254
It's just a political marriage, ffs.
The princess and I barely have to see each other again after the wedding. I get a dowry and a measure of political power, the princess gets a child and an absentee husband and gets to chill with her lover/s, the king gets a worthy heir and doesn't have to worry about his daughter getting knocked up out of wedlock anymore.
>b-but anon what about love?!
Marriage is a business transaction. You're taking a personal relationship and turning it into a business relationship. Love has nothing whatsoever to do with it.
>tfw you're just a monster stitched together from various parts
I don't have genitals, I do, however, have a detachable blade where my genitals would be located.
So consummating the marriage may be the worst idea in recent history, and a fruitless endeavor.
>>46680133
You fool, clearly she is a Changeling trying to seduce you to... do whatever it is Changelings do.
Come to think of it, check the King. These fuckers like to work in groups.
>>46680154
>I don't have genitals, I do, however, have a detachable blade where my genitals would be located.
THAT SOUNDS AWESOME
>So consummating the marriage may be the worst idea in recent history, and a fruitless endeavor.
JUST DO IT YOU FUCKING FAGGOT. NO REGRETS.
I roll to intimidate.
>>46679254
>that princess
I only have one character in recent memory who wouldn't want to hit that.
And that's only because said character was a robot and technically genderless(though turned himself into a female robot once because he was curious, then changed himself back once his curiosity was satisfied).
>>46679254
I'd remind him that I don't have the necessary equipment to produce an heir for him.
>>46680154
Are you playing some manner of Vampire Knight Requiem based game?
>>46680154
>I have no penis but I must kill
>>46680216
There's an ancient temple deep in the jungle that has a 20ft golden cock stuck the ground that will solve that problem.
>>46680463
Then what does the king need me for?
>>46680341
Nope, just a monsters theme, I obviously took my inspiration from Frankenstein's monster, but closer to the original interpretation and less of "The Creature" version.
Then dip it in homunculus batter, fry it up in victorian fashion oil, sprinkle on a bit of walking war machine and viola!
He wasn't a very happy man, but he was pleasant when he wasn't stabbing your face off.
>>46679254
You go through with the marriage. This is the best thing ever for both you and the princess.
>you get a title and enormous wealth
>princess gets a husband who won't mind her fooling around with the foppish young courtiers
>>46680483
It solves his problem in that it gives you the missing equipment needed to produce an heir. You're still needed because you are a hero and it looks good to have a hero in the family and a hero's genes in his daughter's kid.
>>46680520
>being a cuck
If they don't force it on me then I'll just tell them no thanks.
Ask for some gold in a few bags and be on my way.
>>46680545
JEENS? What's them then? Sounds like some sort of witchcraft to me!
1) I'm already married.
2) I'm a woman.
>>46680545
>retrieve the magic golden dildo
>give it to the princess
>"Here, now you can go fuck yourself. You don't need me anymore."
>>46680587
How is the only adventurer here with any balls the one without any balls?
>>46680567
It isn't. Furthermore I literally told you go touch a giant golden dong to get a dick so how are you only responding to that bit of terminology?
>>46680587
It's a giant statue that you touch to get a dick. You can't retrieve it.
>>46680577
>2) I'm a woman.
We covered this.
>>46680577
You're in a setting created by Paizo so you have to put on a belt of gender change and cuck your shitlord husband.
>>46680648
You didn't cover being married already or being straight.
>>46680652
But what if they're marriedto another woman?
>>46680648
I know what a giant dick is, ye fekkin' moron! And I know what magic is, too! But I've not heard of these fancy heretical JEENS!
I say he's a witch, we should burn em.
>>46680681
Then they have to become polyamorous to be even more progressive. This is Paizo after all.
>>46680670
It's politics is what it is! Ye don't have ta worry 'bout that. Ye jus' gotta marry 'er fer the dowry and the prestige. It's also impolite to deny the king or the local lords. And illegal.
Ye ken what I mean?
Jus' marry the lass, get yer dowry, an go.
Simple.
'Course, I'd just stay with 'er, and introduce yer husband as your consort. I'm sure she'd understand, lass.
>>46680556
it is very diffucult to simply say
>no thanks
when the king offers you his daughter.
>>46680829
rejecting a gift can be quite the insult.
>>46679254
IDGAF
Marry her anyway, secretly use my adventuring prowess to assassinate any rivals to the throne, she becomes the heir and my children will rule.
>>46679254
Tell the king I'm super gay and I like to take dicks while dressed up like a princess.
>>46680850
exactly, especially when that gift is the guys daughter.
>>46679254
I tell the GM I'm sick of his goddamn /u/boating and my barbarian is straight
STRAIGHT
S T R A I G H T
HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY IT
STOP THROWING WAIFUS AT ME
PLEASE BY GOD PLEASE
>>46680886
I swear I've seen you before.just give in
>>46680906
You have.Maybe next time. There's one on thebooks that might work.
>>46679254
Because the Emperor already asked me to marry his daughter and become his heir and emperor > king.
>>46679254
Same way I get out of everything - get piss-drunk and embarrass myself so hard the king would revoke my marriage to her.
Or, just marry her, put a few royal kids in her belly, and spend the rest of the time gallivanting around like I wanted to.
>>46679254
But I was promised gold.
>>46680870
Yeah but you're just some dirty hobo that does odd jobs
I'm more then sure the King ain't going to take it to heart
>>46679254
I seduce the princess. Get her preggers. Ride off before the marriage. Then gather an army "to liberate my children and save my beloved from the evil king". The princess "is an unfortunate casualty". Become King. Marry Waifu.
>>46679254
>Sir I just ripped a man's beating heart out of his chest and shoved it down his friends throat till he choked on it. Pretty sure I'm not the guy you want your daughter marrying.
>>46679254
>implying I didn't leave my betrothed to serve the kingdom, and I can't deny her honorably
>implying the princess isn't a yandere that will kill our bride and force us to murder her, her new husband that she married out of duty, and her entire army in a vengeful rampage
>>46681167
That's what made me want to marry her to you. My son is such a massive pussy. I mean look at that nerd. He's fucking reading! The remnants of the wizards loyalists are still in the castle just begging to be cut down and the pansie is just reading a book.
>>46681049
Nah, that would make it even more of an insult.
I mean, the king mightn't want you as his son in law but he has to offer a worthy reward and for you to refuse it is stating that either it is not a good enough reward, thereby insulting his daughter, or that you are above accepting gifts from the king, thereby insulting the king.
What you do is accept the gift and raise yourself up to the appropriate standard. You can still adventure and argue its about maintaining yer rep and honour but drop the dirty hobo part.
>>46681208
But reading was the thing that help me killed that wizard!
>>46681219
But clothing and finery provides no mechanical benefits. It's wasting loot!
>agree, whilst establishing connections in another kingdom for travel
>ask to quicken the wedding because you are so in love
>take the dowry
>preform in the ceremony as best you can
>hit it then quit it
>onward towards new adventures
>>46681244
It ain't loot when you pay for it with the Kings funds. After all, he can't allow his son in law to be scruffy for christ sake!
So what Im saying is hopping in a river now and then is free and youd be getting the clothes cost free too.
>>46681284
So what you're saying is that I buy a few pairs of fancy clothes and tell him I'm buying a bunch.
>>46681280
This, but I dramatically escape during the wedding. Probably via leaping through a stained glass window after swinging on a chandelier.
No woman has ever contained Cold Feet Roberts.
>>46681219
This is all a very good plan but I'm the dude who killed the evil wizard, saved the princess and the fucking day and I only asked for a few smallish bags of gold for a reward.
If I don't want to marry the princess I'm not going.
>>46681037
jokes on you, the treasury doesn't contain any actual treasure. the princesses hand in marrige is one of the few valuable the kingdom has left that is a liquid asset
>>46681167
Giant rip and tear man would add giant rip and tear genes to the gene pool.
Your son would be biggest ripping and tearing king in history.
>>46681417
I'll settle for her choker.
>>46681417
Well then I'm taking the kingdom.
>>46681378
Dude, you can accept the princesses hand in marriage, gaining wealth, political acumen and hot ass into the bargain, or you can offend the king.
Now, the king prolly cant do shit because his kingdom is in disarray but youd still be offending the king and chances are he has little gold spare for giving as a reward.
>>46681049
>king offers murderhobo his daughter
>murderhobo says nope.
both the king and princess are probably gonna die of shame
>>46681500
>gaining wealth, political acumen and hot ass into the bargain,
With strings attached. A ton of strings attached. Chains, really.
Roughly the same thing happened to my kobold paladin. Unfortunately got pressed/forced to go through with it by the group for the benefits it would net us.
>>46681167
>too tier badass
>probably beloved by the entire kingdom
>not wanting his daughter to be your cum dump.
c'mon anon. At this point, he would probably offer his own ass up to get you and your genes to join his family.
>>46680154
sheathe thy blade
then sheathe the sheath sheathing thy blade
>>46681588
What, none of them were willing?
>>46681565
Like what? You're the princesses husband, not a lord. You yourself would have no responsibility bar producing a child.
>>46681549
Or, considering that the King is probably popular, the murderhobo is going to get a bad reputation and be mocked as a disrespectful madman.
>>46681618
None of them were reputable enough for that kind of reward.
>>46679254
I am a nomad. A kind-hearted, somewhat heroic nomad, but a nomad nonetheless. I travel the earth, never remaining in the same place more than a few months. That's no life for a princess.
>>46681642
Yeah but you're have to be a fool to think that it won't effect you in some way. Forcing your to be a part of it.
I mean hell do you really think your wife is going to let you go on Adventures when there'res problems in the kingdom?
>>46680000
>The Quad-Emprah has offered you his daughter in marriage.
>Wait a second...where's my daughter? Where did that Prince come from? This room is the CENTER of an impenetrable fortress!
>Must have been the work of a tactical gen-
CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED.
Hope that answers your question.
>>46681644
would a king be as popular as a hero though?
>>46681725
He deposed the evil lord who used to rule the land with an iron fist in his youth, and has ruled fairly ever since.
>>46681711
That assumes your wife A) has a say in the matter or B) even likes you all that much.
This is a political marriage. Its all about both sides getting good shit
You get:
Pussy
Money
Prestige
Power
The King gets:
Awesome heirs
Acclaim
Maintained honour
A worthy husband for his daughter
What she wants doesn't really enter into it, unless you want it to, and even then historically it was common enough for royal spouses to live in seperate castles etc and Im sure the princess would appreciate you letting her be free to do whatever the fuck she wants.
>>46681725
Possibly. Monarchies usually had popular kings; it was the noblepeople who were blamed for stuff, most of the time. I don't know, if the king were particularly unpopular then a hero could surpass them (and popularly usurp them, maybe). I figure if it was a particularly savvy hero they'd be about on par.
For the good of the kingdom just lie back and think of Canada.
A hero king is good for morale.
What if the senile as fuck old duke's new wife expresses interest in you and wants tries to get you in her pants because the duke is an asshole she was arranged to marry?
>>46681865
I doubt the average king would allow a hero more popular than them into the family, to be fair.
A hero thats more acclaimed is one thing. A hero thats more popular is asking for a rebellion
>>46679318
C U C K
>>46679254
Just keep swapping and stitching different parts to her until I find something pleasing. Should probably taper her mind into associating serving me with extreme euphoria as well.
>>46681907
is that not the perfect reason to marry him into the family though?
>>46681644
>Oh no, people don't like me now.
>okay.
Well that takes care of that.
>>46681907
Most kings aren't immortal they gotta think about the future. Plus it looks good to have a(nother) hero in the family.
Smokebomb.
>>46681963
I didn't say that would be a problem for a murderhobo
if anything, such an offer of honor, decorum, practicality, and general social advancement might be the true test of a murderhobo's commitment to his murderhoboing ways. A cleric murderhobo who accepts the binds of marriage in lieu of a more significant monetary reward would surely be punished by his God and lose his powers of murderhobo-dom.
>>46681959
Nah m8, that offers the hero legitimacy.
All that needs to happen is for the Hero to claim that the king is senile or whatever and that the queen/heir should take over. Either the king acquiesces or he faces a popular rebellion lead by the hero acting as defender of the queen/heir, which will probably earn him more support, so he can install himself as the king/regent to his wifes queen/heir
>>46681971
There is something to this alright but ideally they shouldn't be someone that could lead a popular rebellion against you. The really smart, charismatic and well liked hero becomes a minor noble that you watch closely while the acclaimed hero of great might joins the family.
>>46681100
Hearing of you cause, the King sends your kid and the princess to you before your army has even completely musters. She's overjoyed to be reunited with you and tells everyone she meets.
How now brown cow?
>>46679254
Just go with it. Arranged marriages usually work out quite well, minus the handful of instances that make the history books.
A little wine will fix everything if something's bothering you.
>>46682060
The sort of person that would make those claims and try to boot daddy in law off the throne isn't a Hero. They may have done heroic things, but they ain't a Hero, so don't call them that.
>>46682060
Are you retarded?
A princess doesn't give legitimacy if a male heir already exists and there is no reason to think she'd support your coup of her father. Some chucklefuck marrying the princess doesn't suddenly give him the ability to take on the kings army or any other adventurers trying to get his favor. If the hero claims the king is senile the King will just have a doctor and some noble witnesses examine him and tell you to fuck off.
>>46681893
You know those guys who get their dicks cut off, shoved in their mouths, and then hung from the gate by their entrails? Yeah, that's what happens if you get caught...so you best have a plan on how not to get caught.
>>46682122
Everyones a hero in the battles the win man. If the heros rebellion was successful, a bunch of stories about the king being mad etc will be ''uncovered'', making it evident that the hero was acting in the best interests of the kingdom.
The difference between Freedom Fighter and Terrorist, or Hero and Villain, is very often a matter of success.
>>46679254
I become the next evil wizard.
I wanted fucking spell components, not a princess and all that responsibility. Taking over the old wizard's tower and screwing over the old codger of a King who lies about having rare materials in my spare time sounds like a good idea.
I think what this thread has taught me is that if my DM ever "offers" this then it's not really a choice and just an opportunity to fuck me in the ass if I don't go along with their plot.
>>46682122
Achilles is the archetype of a hero and he rebelled over his fucktoy being taken away. Heroism doesn't require one to be reasonable or nice.
Are we assuming she's the heir? 'Cause if so, hey, I want a piece of that dynastic action.
>>46682322
>marrying your heir off to a murderhobo
>>46680463
Yeah but I'd rather have that in me than on me.
>>46682367
Then drag the princess with you and make her touch it.
>>46679254
I'm not sure you want that. I'm told lycanthropy is, among other things, an STD.
>>46682384
>>46680463
>>46680216
I have the necessary equipment to produce an heir but I'm having her touch it anyway.
>>46682470
>Not wanting to go on lycanthropic killing sprees with a cute girl.
Nigga u gay.
>>46682063
He sent an assassin with them. The princess and our child are killed in the attack. Many nobles swear themselves to my cause to defeat the traitorous king who is clearly being possessed by the evil wizards spirit.
>>46682669
Why would the king send an assassin against a warrior known to be highly skilled when he was already sending your demand that would have ended a costly war?
Why would the assassins death result in their deaths unless you were being blatantly careless with her life?
>>46679254
Seems pretty reasonable a scenario, given that my GM let me get away with basically being a Blues Brother. I will be getting out of this by promising her my love and then vanishing without a trace.
When the revenge comes, I'll be using Glibness to make excuses and get out of her retribution.
>>46682603
This'd be one of those characters that see being a werewolf as a curse rather than a superpower, or at least one that expects the king and kingdom to have that view and get pissed at them when their royal bloodline is tainted.
>>46679254
What, is she butterface or something?
Funnily enough, one of my old characters would have been arranged to marry a princess had his dad gotten his way. He saw her as flightly and braindead, he had another lover, and said princess was six years younger than him.
The dad was killed in a completely unrelated incident, and the marriage never really went up going through because other politics happened.
>>46680850
>rejecting a gift can be quite the insult.
Marriage is not a gift
And that king is certainly not evil, otherwise he would have pinged up on our paladin's detect evil when we first started doing shit for him.
It's easy: politely decline his so-called "gift" and continue doing what we were doing until now.Unless he is wearing an item to hide his alignment and he is some shade of evil, then I would understand if he tried to get forceful with his proposal.
>>46683724
>Marriage is not a gift
You don't understand history then. Marriage, and all the baggage it carries, particularly with someone of power, absolutely is a gift.
>>46683757
I was talking from a subjective point of view. For me and other fa/tg/uys that you've read right now, arranged marriages suck hardcore.
>>46682766
Because I'm lying. LE ftw.
>>46679689
Right there. Love will come in time. The noble born have responsibilities beyond those of common people, small price to pay for their concurrent privilege and comfort.
>>46679254
I accept, but arrange for fake evidence "proving" that I am the king's illegitimate son to come to light before the wedding. Even for royalty that's too closely related for them to go through with it, and I still get all the bonuses.
>>46680150
Who hurt you, anon?
>>46684136
My wife desu
>>46683984
Actually, if my memory of history is correct, I think that there were some marriages where that kinda thing happened. Ya know "to keep the bloodline pure and not pollute it with some filthy peasent's blood" kinda stuff.
That being said however, I just kinda wonder if I could get away with someone playing "Dueling Banjos" from delieverence as a part of the wedding march.
>>46684266
I thought that they typically didn't go closer than uncle and niece?
And I am just redneck enough to seriously consider banjos being played at my wedding.
>>46679428
Obviously, because you're not in love with her.
This could be for any number of reasons, possibly including her personality or looks.
>>46684312
if anything, I would have this played at my wedding. That is, if any woman could have a handsome neckbeard such as myself for a husband.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Me2njoQ3dAY
>>46679254
Sense when did royal marriages care about love, I must prepare myself to truly be a royal consort aka handle all the local politics and finances while the new queen goes and declares glorious war/
>>46679254
>tfw your character is already spoken for
well this is awkward
>>46684312
Depends. Brother Sister was frowned upon in Europe but if their was no concrete evidence that they were related it could go through. Of course that is the perfect opportunity for a claimant to press their claim. Outside of Europe, again it depends. Zoroastrians(not that there were many around) and some sects of Hindus had few issues with it and their were a few Khans that fathered children with their sisters(though not in marriage, Oghuz peoples could be, interesting). I'm sure there are other examples you could dig up.
>>46684564
I'm sure that it was definitely a thing that happened at some points in some cultures, but in this case I'm assuming OP's scenario is generic European-based fantasy. Taking that into account I'd say forging a close enough blood relation to bar marriage is an acceptable and very PC-like strategy for solving the problem presented.
Prefer it when the queen is available. Best in game reward I've gotten was getting hitched to the goblin queen as a reward.
>>46680341
>You will never piss napalm with a Megavore trunk
>>46681167
That makes bitches wet as october actually.
>>46680763
You forgot to add 'tell everyone how progressive you are at every waking moment' that'd make it a paizo product.
>>46681565
If Prince Philip of Edimburg has taught me something is that being the king consort has little stings attached.
>>46679254
Does the princess love me?
Even if I may not love her, I may learn to love her.
Give love a chance.
is this kind of stuff common in other peoples games? cause i've never seen something like this happen in mine, but in the last day alone i think i've heard of about at least 4 people who's characters were forced into political marriages.
>>46685946
Welcome to /tg/, where the stories are made up and opinions don't matter.
>>46685946
Not common I imagine but I can definitely attest to it happening. Though we have played political oriented games so stuff like that sometimes is necessary to the plot.
>>46684364
What's love got to do with marriage?
>>46680577
Your husband can knock her up.
Sorry Anon, you should do it
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GPX-mW4l1rU
>>46686089
But then she'd be a cuckquean.
Had this happen to my character posing as a male. Weird game situation after that.
>>46679254
Just tell you are a holy knight saving others without rewards other than rewards for life purposes, like food, weapons, traveling money, and his religion/knight codex forbidd marrying the princess.
>>46686257
Considering the telling silence from that anon, I'll just assume she's furiously shlicking to that idea right this moment.
>>46679254
Hey, it's political marriage. I marry her and spend with her, like, 10 days in a year. Knock her up with baby, then go adventuring to avoid politics and all that shit.
>>46681912
>I don't get it!
It's a political marriage. Your actual lovers are different.
>>46679254
'Stare'
'Stare more'
"Your majesty, as i hope you can clearly see, I am an elder lich. So if the intent of this offer was for it to produce heirs for thy kingdom you will be disappointed.
Admittedly if i bothered i could probably whip
up some sort of magic dick but why bother,
also why would your beautiful daughter desire polished bones.."
"~Bone~sama!"
"...Aaand thats my que, forget the reward byeeee" Greater teleports the fuck out of there.
>>46679318
There is a big problem in this, in it that the legitmacy of the heir will be weak at best.
I can already see a civil war in the futur.
>>46686848
What if the princess looks like Albedo?
>>46685946
No, but at my table, my characters are sometimes subject to being hit on by NPCs that none of us asked for or wanted to be even of a romantic nature. Naturally, it is played for comedy.
Last time I did a performance with my bard, a large rock landed on stage with a pair of troll-sized panties wrapped around it.
>>46683778
Except that's not really accurate. >>46682087 is accurate. We live in a day and age where Arranged Marriage is seen as a practice for the history books, and derided as trampling on FREEDOM 'MURICA FUCK YEAH. We anti-romanticize it as the worst fate imaginable and certainly the worst source of a couple but that's wrong. Our cultures are suffering bitterly for a lack of arranged marriages. Not every one of us -- I've done well enough for myself and probably a plurality of the population tries to figure things out for themselves and has it work -- but letting everyone try to just find a mate on their own does not have better outcomes than the alternative.
>Dating is hard, guys!
The clusterfuck of modern courtship is difficult to navigate, because while everyone who steps into the ring wants the same thing (find a desirable, lifelong mate) we don't all agree on what that means and many of us don't even understand, especially when younger, what that means for US. Parents and matchmakers know the young better than the young know themselves. Why do you think dating sites are so damn popular? They provide a service we've demonized (Matchmaking/marriage arrangement, peasant style) in a modernized form people can accept
>Relationships work when you make them work
Passion is a shitty grounds for a lasting marriage. Love is better in theory, but how do you define it? And whatever the basis the point is that you get out of a relationship, or a marriage, what you put into it. People don't seem to realize anymore that human partnership is harder than gazing into someones eyes while little birdies chirp and suddenly being in bliss forever. Everyone has bad days and it takes a deep attachment to push through them and learn to work together as a couple, making the best of being flawed human beings, flesh and bone like everyone else. You know what gives the incentive to put in that work and breeds acceptance of its necessity? Arranged marriages.
>>46688520
To answer the OP... Unless I've got a good reason to refuse that the king would understand when mentioned as part of declining politley (Already married, another perhaps more personally tasteful offer already on the table that it would be dishonorable to dump, etc.) you take the princess' hand, tell the king say you're honored and would like nothing better, and start to tell yourself that while this might not be what you dreamed of it's sure as hell not going to be that bad.
>king offers you his daughter's hand in marriage
>it's a daki bodypillow with OP pic on it
>the king's eyes shine with pride as he introduces you two
>the entire royal court is watching your reaction closely
>>46688520
This guy gets it.
Claim celibacy.
>>46679254
>While you do not hate her, for some reason or another you do not wish to marry her.
And? She's probably equally disinterested in me. We simply agree together to a completely political marriage, and to be discrete with our lovers. If the time comes that we can both agree on trying for an heir, we can schedule something around her menstrual cycle.
>>46688520
This is definitely one of the better posts I've seen on /tg/ this week.
>>46679758
Then you got killed and raped, end of story.
>>46679254
>On a personal quest for vengeance to settle past wrongdoings.
"Welp, let's go get you sized up for a suit of armor, ma'am. I hope they at least taught you how to hold a sword right, because you're sure as hell going to need one. Or six; this is probably going to take awhile."
The poor girl is either going to die painfully in a foreign land with nobody but her good-for-nothing husband to comfort her in her final moments, or she is going to beat the odds and we're going to make an awesome power couple.
I guess she could also murder me in my sleep and go back home, but her survival becomes less feasible the further we get away from home.
>>46688702
>She's probably equally disinterested in me.
unless she is some kind of lesbian, the thought of the great hero probavly gets her ladyparts all tingly.
>not marrying her and let her know the arts of war and the world beyond the walls of her castle
>not transforming your princess into a knight princess that is ashamed of showing her girly side
>not adding an extra character to the party for increased DPS
Roleplaying, magical realm and mechanics, marrying a princess is a win win win
>How do you get out of this? Or is it better to like back and think of (your country here)
No, that's what you do when your husband is away on the Empire's business and you're home alone.
Anyway, princesses are usually married for the sake of politics, and you're probably not much to speak of there. So as long as you're polite about it, the king probably won't mind if you pass on her.
>>46689355
>No, that's what you do when your husband is away on the Empire's business and you're home alone.
is that what that expression means? i always thought it meant undesirable sex
>>46689381
It does mean undesirable sex, particularly that meant to conceive an heir. That other anon is an ignoramus.
>marrying your daughter to a random murderhobo just because he happened to kill something that was threatening the people
The Emperor is retarded, no wonder the kingdom is going to shit.
>>46679254
>"I don't hate her..."
Is this an anime universe I'm living in? Do you think I'm some sort of beta MC that is too scared to fuck a girl even if she's butt-naked and actively spreading her legs for me?
>>46689432
>Everyone plays murderhobos
>What is 5e putting the "noble" background in the core book?
>>46689432
Not all heroes are murderhobos, there's nothing preventing a wizard-slayer from being of noble stock
>>46689471
Hey, nobles are just as good at murderhoboing at anyone else. Just look at the Normans. What do you think all those second, third, and + sons do?
>>46686848
Jiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii~~
>>46688520
>They provide a service we've demonized (Matchmaking/marriage arrangement, peasant style)
Except the dating site gives you a choice. An arranged marriage doesn't really do that, be it through social pressure or by force. Even today there are parts of the world where not going along with the arranged marriage means your own family will outright murder you, especially if you where to be the bride.
>You know what gives the incentive to put in that work and breeds acceptance of its necessity? Arranged marriages.
And what about arranged marriages provided that incentive? The fact that the two probably don't have any fucking choice. It's a rare thing to have arranged marriages AND divorces being a realistic option. Not much use forcing someone into somethign if they're free to just walk out the other side straight away.
But sure, if you're fine with having someone else choose your mate, then there's no problem with that, as it's ultimately by your choice that you go along with it. But outright forcing someone into marriage against their will, that just ain't nice.
I'm a Half-Farspawn, I can't even remember what my dick used to look like or where the fuck did it go.
>>46679254
"Look, don't take this the wrong way, but I like living in the shadows. It's simple, it pays well, and I get to shoot people. I like my nice little 3x3 plot of public campground down in Redding that the CFS lets me sleep free on ever since that thing with the bug shamans. I like waking up at 11:30, not showering 'cause I don't have a shower, and spending the time I'm not shooting people lazing out front Daryl's stuffer shack arguing over whether Ares is going to take the Cup this year. I know that must be hard for you dandelion eaters to wrap your heads around, but that's the plain and simple. My life is simple, and I like simple. So no, I ain't marrying your damn princess. Go ask Nikolai; he's the face adept who can wear the fancy suits and talk the fancy talk and all the other dumb bullshit you people do up here."
"Now what you can do for me, if you feel so compelled to reward me, is point me to the nearest novacoke dealer and a bar."
>>46679254
>>46679254
This image triggers me
Rana best
>>46689503
Murderhoboing was by and large how you became a noble in the first place. Make a name for yourself looting shit and eventually the local bigwig would give you a job. Or you could simply loot his.
I would do it, but a competent noble friend has a thing for her and would make a better ruler than myself.
I take her hand, and he challenges me for it. I'm a swordmage, and he's a knight. We duel without the use of magic of enchanted equipment. I put up a good fight, but he wins honorably.
Princess gets a husband that cares and can rule, buddy gets a waifu, and I get an in with the next-generation monarchy. Win-win. I'll probably bang the fat chamber maiden.
>>46679254
Marry her, enjoy the fact that I just married a princess. Make an heir and take a mistress. Wife dies during childbirth (because of the hemlock), marry mistress.
It's the middle ages, fucking taught this shit by my tutor.
>>46679254
What if I want the Queen?
>>46691139
That's not how politics work, friendo.
>>46679254
Does she have a cuter little sister I can marry instead?
>>46691186
But anon, what if the PC desires the Queen?
>>46691227
She has one, but the king has to marry his oldest off first.
>>46691271
Do it
>>46691271
And so I will go on a grand quest to find other suitable husbands for all but the most adorable of the king's daughters! I will not rest until his bloodline is guaranteed to contain all the greatest of heirs!
>>46691227
>>46691271
>>46691321
And then anon was playing Taming of the Shrew.
Well, if his daughter is OPs pic...
No dissent here, marry her right up.
>>46691599
honestly I would play the fuck out of that campaign. "The king has x daughters and one of you is in love with the youngest one and you've all agreed to help. You have x-1 party members, pick who you'll court and make yourself worthy of them through whatever means. And find the last suitor who you'll help with the same. Or something along those lines.
>>46692381
I was thinking it wouldn't work well as a campaign, but maybe as a video game using dating sim elements. Start out with you as a hero saving the youngest princess and falling in love with each other. When you return to the king he offers his daughter's hand in marriage, leaving you ecstatic for a few moments before some woman you've never seen before walks out and you learn he ha a number of other daughters who must be married in order from oldest to youngest. The king thinks you're a cool guy, but he can't go against tradition leaving you with no choice but to find husbands for each princess. You have to go on arduous quests to find great heroes that not only will the king accept as sons, but the girls are also fond of, else they undermine your efforts through various means.
>>46679254
But I don't want to. I do want to marry a princess and settle down for peaceful life of murderous court intrigue.
>>46679254
>for some reason or another you do not wish to marry her
Of course I don't, it is a fucking hand!
>>46679254
My character is a warforged ranger who was once a old hermit ranger that faired forced his dying soul in to a metal monster's body. He's too old, hates people and doesn't have a dick, what the fuck would I want to marry that whore?
>>46692647
You don't. Read the OP more thoroughly.
>>46692647
>>46692679
ok, probally say now, show my no gentitals and run away to the woods.
>>46692679
Fine then, why the fuck would the king want his daughter to marry a robot? What on Earth did she do to deserve this? Is the king senile?
>>46692719
The king is senile and the princess has a robot thing fetish. Unfortunately this /d/eviant has found a way around the no heir thing too >>46680463
>>46679758
Then the two of you both get knocked up by the royal dragon, just like every other female in the Septim line traditionally has been since Akatosh first cuckolded Tiber Septim in the 2nd Era!
>>46681722
Looks like somebody just found 1d4chan.
>>46692381
I can only imagine my party's reaction to that plan.
>Rogue
You want me to take an arrow to the knee so you can get the girl you want? Dude, there is only so much I can tha-oh god, demand titties...well I guess I can take one for the team. Bros before hoes and all that.
>Cleric
I'm a man of my god. It wouldn't be right for me to marry some poor girl when her husband is already sworn to another master. And another thing, taking me to the library ro meet her won't change anythi-oh you bastard...you knew I liked bookworms with glasses. Lord, why must you tempt me so?
>fighter
You know I love you like a brother, but come on now, would you really wish me in anyone? You know how bad I can get I-oh geeze, look at the butt on that one...you know what? I could clean up my act for dat ass.
>>46679254
>trying to play a LG incubus paladin who must complete 1,001 good deeds to win the heart of another delicious princess
"I'm flattered, really; unfortunately, I believe that I'm already spoken for--
"Ooooooon the other hand, those swords *do* look rather sharp..."
>>46680133
> largest rack I've ever seen
> my character hunts deer for a living
>>46679254
Marry her and my seed will become King, is it really a difficult question?
>>46679305
This
Is the princess the woman in the OP? Why would she not be the woman of my dreams?
>>46694438
>>46680133
I didn't get it until you pointed it out to me lol
>>46679254
I'd remind him that my character is a eunuch.
>>46679254
>"Yes commander, its true. The king from that backwards/backwater land is saying I'am obliged to now marry his daughter; the princess, and that I may even be prince... What should I do sir? I'am sure if I'am prepared for marriage. While I have to admit it was still fun and hilarious that the oh so evil and oh so powerful wizard was easily killed by a volley 7.62 bullets while he was busy in his long badguy spiel and banter... But what should I do about this marriage commander?"
>>46679254
>giving a Jayan a tiny princess wife
I wonder if this is his plot to stall me until the Inquisition comes.
>>46682364
>Allowing women to inherit
Shitty kingdom deserves what it gets.
>>46679305
My grandfather had to bail out of his cargo plane into the jungle during the War. He fell in with some natives, and eventually, the chieftain tried to match his daughter with grandpa. The dashing flyboy then showed the chieftain pictures of his wives and girlfriend. Yes, he was a bigamist and still had time for a woman on the side.
Soon after, the tribe returned gramps back to civilization. Go figure.
>>46679254
She looks alright.
Fuck her and leave, go find some other kingdom to adventure in. This one's out of adventure.
>>46688520
>Our cultures are suffering bitterly for a lack of arranged marriages.
Citation needed
>but letting everyone try to just find a mate on their own does not have better outcomes than the alternative.
So instead let's just go back to how it was done in the dark ages. Gotcha.
>They provide a service we've demonized (Matchmaking/marriage arrangement, peasant style) in a modernized form people can accept
Please provide numbers for how many people actually have seen it work and haven't separated after they got together and/or married and stick to the "until death do us part".
>Passion is a shitty grounds for a lasting marriage.
That's the first thing you said right all day. I agree.
>and suddenly being in bliss forever.
No one said anything about being in bliss forever because of love though: we all agree that a relationship between two humans has it's highs and lows. Stop strawmanning.
>it takes a deep attachment to push through them and learn to work together as a couple
Yes, something else beside "My parents wanted me to marry this stranger who I don't dislike but don't like either" from the arranged marriages. Sure, there are niche cases where arranged marriages actually manage to make love bloom between husband and wife, but hey: let's just ignore that arranged marriages in islamic places are still a thing and that husbands beat their wives because they don't love them in the least. I digressed: arranged marriages do not have the same factor that married couples have through love, through that same love that makes them stick together through thick and thin, through easy times as through strife instead of an arranged contract where both care very little about each other and only do it because of Peer pressure.
Because it's usually -as in, in most cases- for peer pressure that couples agree to arranged marriages and nothing else.
>>46701601
>"Come back and stand down sergeant. Don't worry about it, I'll handle the long ears: get some rest, you've deserved it."
>>46689586
This nigga gets it!
>>46679254
I give her anal so that she will want to pull out of it as well.
>>46689586
you know there's a difference between arranged marriage and forced marriage
So did I just literally walk into a thread where a guy is such a betafag that he wants his mother to pick a girlfriend for him?
Yeah, girls sure love a momma's boy...
>>46708071
If arranged marriages were still a thing, that girl wouldn't have a choice about that momma's boy
>>46679254
Accept, claim the throne when he croaks, form a PU with my home nation.
>Just as planned.scroll
>>46682173
>The difference between Freedom Fighter and Terrorist, or Hero and Villain, is very often a matter of success.
This jesus fuck. The only reason we don't remember America's Founding Fathers as a bunch of fanatical treasonous murderers looking to grab something that would have probably been given in a few years anyway is because they won.
>Not wanting your wife to be a beautiful princess
>Not wanting all the wealth and status that comes with it
>Not wanting your son to be King
Only a faggot would say no to this.
>>46711925
This. If you really don't want her, take a mistress on the side. Wed one, bed the other. Keep your affairs discreet and nobody will be the wiser.
>>46704346
>"And then they made me their chief."
Cool story if true, but Imma want to see some sort of evidence here.
>>46679254
Tell the king that I am already engaged and harems are not allowed by my religion. As man of honor, he should understand me.
>>46711925
Not knowing the princes is a tranny.
>>46689586
The association of Love and Marriage is a rather recent affair, historically speaking.
Speaking of history and affairs, almost every bit of romantically dedicated historical art/poetry/etc is dedicated to someone the artist was having an affair with.
The cuckold's opinion aside, affairs were socially acceptable back in the day.
>>46679254
Question? Is your succession law Agnatic?
>>46714438
Egyptians did it first.
>>46714992
>The story of how we turned D&D into CK2
>>46679254
It really matters here why I don't hate her but don't wish to marry her.
>>46684364
What a misguided derail. Not being in love with someone is, while significant and possibly tangentially related, essentially totally disconnected with wanting not wanting to marry someone. You can love someone, and not want to marry them. You can not love someone, and want desperately to marry them.
You asked this question, presumably, because you thought that the some of varied people in this thread might have differences in them that would express themselves with answers that were somehow useful to you. So, it follows that when someone asks you about the specifics, ie. the circumstances that will interact with the quirks of their personality to potentially provide that original response that you might like, you should oblige them.
If I don't want to marry her because I know she's in love with another and I'm sympathetic to her cause, that's one thing. If I don't want to marry her because I've sworn to marry my own true love, that's another.
The cause of the rejection factors into the method of rejection, that should be obvious.
>>46680187
>do whatever it is Changelings do.
Grow their fingernails really long and kill you... somehow?Sorry, I just watched Krull.
>>46688520
I dont know if i agree with all of this, as choice and freedom to not get married and all that makes up for all the bullshit in my opinion, compare divorce rates in america and india, it's pretty staggering
>>46712044
You wouldn't if some dude literally fell from the sky one day?
>>46705381
>arranged marriages in islamic places
Just a side note, but most of those are about prestige, honor, goats, etc, not actually making a good match, otherwise you wouldn't end up with 50 year olds marrying 9 year olds.
>>46680488
>stabbing your face off
>detachable blade where my genitals would be located
>>46705381
Loving your wife would be the only thing keeping you from beating her? Time for a serious examination of your life...
>>46680886
>>46680906
>>46680928
Were you in a healer thread?
>>46679254
"Hi, Han Solo."
>>46705381
Muslims beat their wives because women's rights don't exist in those countries, not just because arranged marriage.
>>46712044
I agree with the scepticism. That said, the philandering part was quite true.
>>46684564
>Zoroastrians(not that there were many around)
>citation needed
>>46679254
Obviously my character's wishes are irrelevant. Being presented with such an obvious opportunity for temporal power is clearly a miracle of Bane, and to reject it would be to invite destruction. While his heart may be dedicated to another, taking a consort on the side is hardly his cruelest deed.
Perhaps a royal bride will be invigorating. She does seem eager to please.
>>46720125
I don't have a wife but this I know: if I loved someone, I wouldn't beat them.
>>46679254
...Are you struggling to break up with your girlfriend dude?
>>46725296
That and because they don't love each other but hey, that's beside the point.
