So I've been toying with the idea of making a 40K fanfic based on Chaos characters fighting eachother *even though there isn't actually any of that here* and couldn't really be assed to reformat it into 4chan style, so here it is. I guess.
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1TG8Qj4cPklAUDUs5L35VlQByeNn8cdCStYW2fvdteJ4/edit?usp=sharing
>>46596034
I made a writefriend thread earlier today but it died with no replies
I don't really know Tau lore too well yet, but this is what I came up with for a back story for a force I want to make
http://pastebin.com/Q3p3NSFk
it's not worded like a 40k novel, more like a young adult coming of age story
>>46601776
This. The story fails by the first paragraph to capture any of the essence of 40k.
>>46596034
>https://docs.google.com/document/d/1TG8Qj4cPklAUDUs5L35VlQByeNn8cdCStYW2fvdteJ4/edit?usp=sharing
some of this stuff is a little hard to read
you might want to do some editing
>>46596034
It reads like any fanfic. Rushed and pretty sloppy. Nothing is described in any meaningful way, not even the actions of the characters, "And then he did this, and then he did this and then he did that", with as much of the concepts you seem to like in 40k crammed in as quickly as possible.
Your story reads like a high-schoolers first attempt at a short story for his literary class.
Sorry to be so harsh but you kinda asked for feedback and I see no redeeming qualities in your writing.
On the other hand, if you really want to write and write well, my suggestion is to read more. Read a shit ton, think about what you are reading from the writers point of view, think about the concepts and pacing and characterisation and all that. Then try again.
should we make this into a general writing thread?
>>46605228
ops probably killed himself so I don't think so
>working on short story, how's it turning out?
The storm was battering the rotorplane as we tried to fly in to Vostok-II. The six of us weren’t researchers, we were the private security force of Huronian Corp. By regulation we each had Kevlar body armor over our thermal suits, and were intimately aware just how useless it was. The plane was getting tossed around like a toy in the hands of a god, the blades chopping through air that seemed to be more ice than not. It lurched as the rotors died, and then reversed. The landing gear slammed into the helipad and we filed out as fast as we could.
Ice on the helipad shattered as clamps reached up to grab onto the plane and hold it down. The dull glow of lights beneath the ice lead us to the nearest door and let us inside. When the door sealed back shut after the last man, I tugged off my mask. A sudden cloud of mist formed from my breath and we all stared at it. “Bravo, Charlie, get to the life support and figure out why there’s no heat,” I ordered, turning to two of the men. They stood at attention and nodded. They glanced at each other, and took off jogging. Their footfalls slammed against the steel floor like knocking on a door.
“What do we owe the visit for?” The four of us remaining spun, looking for the source of the heavy Russian voice. I put hand up to calm the men. “There is no shortage of supplies.”
“Fabian,” I shouted. I turned and looked for any of the AI’s terminals, but only saw darkness down the halls. “Where is everyone? We recorded strange fluctuations in the magnetosphere and have lost communications ever since.”
“That is normal during a winter storm. There is nothing to worry about. You have wasted your time by coming here,” Fabian responded, his voice as calm as Lake Vostok four kilometers beneath them. I turned to my men and signaled down the hall. They fell in behind me in a quiet march.
cont.
>>46609705
“If there’s nothing wrong, that’s fine by me. Where’s Dr. Gottshalk?” I asked as I led my men through the halls towards the control room. When we passed the hall to the residential wing, I signaled Echo and Foxtrot to sweep the area. Fabian’s voice was still the only thing we had heard in the entire station.
“Is this about the Salinophiles? I had reported a ninety-eight percent chance of failure before synthesizing them. Huronian demand too much. They would corrupt the lake and render all future experimentation moot,” Fabian explained, the calmness in his voice slipping.
I glanced at Delta and he glanced back. “This isn’t about the Europa Project,” I shouted back. We rounded a corner and the control room for the station finally came into sight in our shoulder lights. We broke into a jog to close the distance to it.
“The lake is alive you know. Life had lingered in it, without seed to latch onto until we put it there. It has to be treated like a living organism. Putting in our experiments is like giving Kostov a disease,” Fabian explained as we forced open the door. There were no locks anywhere in the station, there was no need on the inside. But the door seemed to have frozen into the frame with some sort of black ice.
A hologram appeared in the side of the room, it was of a man from the waist up and nude. When it spoke, Fabian’s voice joined it. “Do you know what it means to be alive?”
“Alpha.” Echo’s voice broke through the bud in my ear, pulling me away from the image. “We found some of the researchers. They’re dead.”
>will be continued eventually
Lads, I wrote a short intro into a scenario where angron gets picked up by the eldar instead of them failing to kill him.
Any suggestions on how to continue this thread or any lore loose ends would be helpful.
>>46610529
why not bump by reading something posted here and responding to it, instead of being an insipid fag?
>>46610565
I don't know, maybe because I posted something here and needed a response?
So I can sharpen my writefagging in this thread right?
