Silmarillion movie: yay or nay? Which of its story threads would you include?
>>44271716
It's happening, like it or not. Too much money left in the Tolkien's legacy to let it lie unviolated.
All of them. Each as a separate movie.
>>44271759
INTO THE PITS WITH YOU, MAGGOTY SNAGGA!
>>44271759
Post yfw the first movie will deal with the creation of the universe up to the destruction of the lamps
>>44271830
Post yfw they're going to make every story into a trilogy.
>>44271949
>>44271759
Actually it can't happen, Christopher Tolkien still has control over the rights for the Silmarillion and everything other than the Lord of the Rings and the Hobbit. Stuff like Children of Hurin and all of that. And he hates what the movies have done to his fathers work, and has been refusing to give up anything else to the studios. Unless he himself chose to produce a movie, we aren't getting one, which is almost definitely for the best.
>>44271830
>>44272011
It's so dense
>>44271716
I don't think they'd be able to do it well. As cool as a movie could potentially be, it'd be really damn hard to make it turn out well.
>>44272021
Chris is an old man himself and its doubtful his kids and grandkids have the same reverance for old man tolkien's materials, it'll be all about dat $
>>44272021
Christopher Tolkien is over 90 years old. While his cause might be noble, he won't carry it for much longer.
>>44272072
Yeah, as awesome as the idea of scenes like Fingolfin versus Morgoth and Hurin fighting until he drowns in corpses seem, they will find a way to ruin them. Fingolfin will actually only be fighting to rescue a girl elf we didn't know about and Hurin will job to make Turin seem cooler.
Stealing back the silmaril will be done in the style of a heist movie.
>>44272021
Well he hated the movies before they had even been shot, because he objects to turning the books into movies in the first place (so he refuses to even watch the movies). His opinion is that the only proper way to enjoy those books is, as books. Which also explains why he hates anything else related to the books too, like the games. If he ever managed to get back the rights - which he won't - he'd shut down the entire licensing industry.
>>44271716
They would slaughter it. Utterly. Of this I have no doubt. If they were faithful to the book itself, it would be amazing, but they wouldn't be.
We will never see Fëanor making his ill-fated oath against the Valar and his kinslaying at Alqualondë. We will never see Fingolfin fighting Morgoth to a standstill after riding across the land like a hurricane in his wrath. We will never see Ancalagon rise above the mountains of Thangorodrim, only to smite them in his ruin when he is slain.
>they shoehorn gandalf and radagast into the stories. Also CGI Saruman. (Or maybe the gollum actor wearing his skin)
>>44273752
>you will never see Earendil flying a F-35 with a silmaril on the tail fighting Ancalgon
>>44271716
The Silmarillion works much better as a mini-series than a set of movies. Although the budget they would need to truly do it justice would be staggering.
>>44273571
>he objects to turning the books into movies in the first place
But why?
>>44275307
He's a traditionalist and think his father's works are best enshrined in the written format for patricians and that movies are for plebes
They took the hobbit, made it longer to watch then to read, added an elf being cucked and made it shit.
Loved the animated one though
Plz no hurt my waifu Saruon.
>>44275348
>Plz no hurt my waifu Saruon.
>>44271830
>>44275545
What's your problem shitlord? A well done movie showing the creation of the universe, the music, the discord of Melkor, and the formation of earth and melkor raising hell would be awesome.
>>44275608
>shitlord
>>>/tumblr/
Go look at your simarillion with shoehorned niggers
>>44275608
This desu
>>44275608
Maybe in the same way a 9 hour trilogy showcasing the 7 days of creation in the christian theology would be "awesome". In other words, not.
SilmFilmProject
http://silmfilm.mythgard.org/
>>44271716
Leaving aside how it would never happen because Christopher Tolkien ain't letting anyone touch shit after seeing what happened to The Hobbit...
I've always felt like The Silmarillion would be ideally suited to an Animatrix-style movie. Get a dozen or so directors, give then all one chunk, of the mythology to tell, and don't have them coordinate at all. Thing is, the Silmarillion is supposed to be a mythology, so it makes perfect sense for each "story" to be different. If one director makes Glaurung look completely different from another, or if one makes Fingolfin look like a noble hero and another makes him look like a waffling coward, that's fine. That's good! It should feel like a mythology, not like a single story, because it was never that; it was meant to be a fantasy history of England, and I think a multi-director storytelling style would be perfect.
Again, that'll never happen, but there's my two cents.
>>44276630
>>44276656
I don't think you understand the fedoras maymay.
>>44273752
Extremely relevant video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3aB6CPyO0Ww
I really wish someone else who isn't a puppet for big corps do ANYTHING related to the Silmarillion. I too would love to see all the characters with their world-shatteringly huge character flaws.
>>44271716
Movie 1
act 1: the migration of the noldor from middle earth to valinor. establish important characters as they settle their new kingdoms, including finwe and fingolfin, and thingol.
act: 2 creation of the silmarils. "recently" freed melkor begins to gain the noldors trust and sway them against the other valar.
act3: theft of the silmarils and the beginning of the kin strife. destruction of the two trees. feanors house makes thier oath of vengeance, and then sacks alequande.
act:4 the migration of the noldor back to middle earth.
movie 2 establishes beleriand and gondolin. Introduce beren as a character. followed by obligatory battles, and then berens recovery of a silmaril, and the fall of gondolin
movie 3 introduces elwing and earendil. romance etc, followed by more obligatory battles, and then earendils journey to valinor. The valar travel back with him to middle earth, and the final climatic battle with morgoth before he is imprisoned. movie ends with the creation of neumenor and a new kingdom for men, setting up for another trilogy about the rise and fall of neumenor and sauron.
>>44273752
I want to see Ungoliant.
>>44272113
>Christopher Tolkien is over 90 years old
Holy shit I had no idea, I thought he was much younger than that. Or maybe I'm thinking of the son of that guy who wrote Dune.
![51kiFwemFKL[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/0NvH8fZ.jpg "51kiFwemFKL[1].jpg")
The only way The Silmarillion, which is a fucking history textbook, works as a conversion to visual format is as part of a metastory. Someone is telling someone ELSE stories about the world, One Thousand and One Nights style.
Frankly I feel like this would work better as an episodic miniseries, with each episode being an Hour long tale from SOMEONE (it wouldn't even have to be the same narrator every episode) about the history and myths of middle earth and imparting some sort of lesson. A Tolkeinian Wishbone, if you will. Obviously, most of the myths would have to be multi-parters.
Trying to treat it as a single entity sequential story doesn't work, because it isn't. It's literally the history of some dudes Campaign setting.
>>44271716
>Silmarillion movie: yay or nay?
No.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Nien. Nyet. Non.
>>44278029
A series of short stories would be just as good.
>>44272133
I hate to say it, but Silmarillion would work better as an anime. More freedom to do crazy epic bullshit with a smaller budget.
>>44278066
Develop your answer
>>44278298
>low budget anime
Do you want bad CGI? Because this is how you get bad CGI
Nay. Never ever ever. I would, however, approve of an opera or ballet cycle.
>>44278328
The CGI would be worse in a movie of the same budget.
And yeah, the First Age was fucking crazy, there was a lot of weird shit going on pretty much constantly. The first 1/3 of the thing would just be pure CG, in all likelihood.
>>44271716
Make it an incredibly unbroken series of movies moving from thread to thread so that no one could interrupt it really quite hypnotic series of unbroken thread moving from movie to movie
>>44278029
>Someone is telling someone ELSE stories about the world, One Thousand and One Nights style.
I think you mean Princess Bride
>>44272680
Would watch.
We've had the overly-serious epic takes, and seen how that screwed up the Hobbit. It's time to throw shit at the wall and make a bunch of random crap, and hopefully half of them will be original and good.
>>44275068
>flying a F-35
>F-35
>flying
Whoa, this may be high fantasy but you can't just throw in all the unbelievable shit you want.
>>44278855
>hopefully half of them will be original and good.
Sure, and Gilgamesh will come out of his mountain.
>>44271716
Make it a Cinemax or HBO series with each major story given part or most of its own season and I'm for it.
>>44278862
>le F-35 can't fly may may
Fifty cents has been deposited into your account.
>>44271716
I don't think it would work as a movie, and if it was a Peter Hackson movie (which it most certainly would be if it were a movie) it would be horrible and a waste.
It would work best as a TV serial. It could possibly be animated, maybe by Peter Chung -- I could see that working.
>>44277914
Brian Herbert certainly hasn't been sitting on Dune IP if you know what I mean.
>>44279006
But nobody wants Dune movies.
>>44271716
Wouldn't really work unless you ignore pretty much everything and do the broadest strokes possible.
The Simirillion is more like the Bible then a traditional fantasy story.
I suppose Children of Hurin would work as a stand-alone film, but holy GOD is it depressing and dark for a Tolkien work, and Hollywood would likely demand it's ending be changed because of it.
>>44278933
thank you. many more shitposts against the great satan tonight, inshallah
>>44279042
I do.
Properly done of course. Not like those shitty sci-fi channel ones we most recently got.
>>44278457
either Bilbo and Gandalf on a boat or Cirdan and Sam, also on a boat.
>Ahh, here's just about where Numenor used to be
>>44271716
The only way I can see a Silmarillion transposition into another media being good without spending millions is at theater.
Tragedies require good actors, precise movements and god tier voice acting.
The biblical/epic themes also go very well with it.
Some parts of experimental theater could be wonderful to interpret the crazies thing. Saw a sphinx made of 20+ people moving and speaking at unison during Oedipus. Could be very very cool for a dragon.
>>44279683
Musical.
Rock Opera.Bollywood.
>>44279712
I'd rather put it as a standard play with maybe some poem part. I do not see a musical in it
>>44279740
Nightfall in Middle Earth is a good album. It could work.
>>44279801
Metal, when used sparingly, can work surprisingly well in plays
>>44275608
>A well done movie
Movies aren't well-done, m8. They're Think Tank-spawned, Big-Wig-raised shitheaps, bruv.
>>44271716
silmarillion anime, featuring Feanor-sama and Nerdanel-chan
>>44271716
>Movie
It'd be a mess incomprehensible to your average /tv/ goer, and would probably seal Jackson's fate to a George Lucas level.
>>44272113
>Christopher Tolkien is over 90s years old
Well damn, time sure flies.
>>44275345
Having seen the disaster of the Hobbit as well as the lackluster quality of every adaptation that wasn't the original Jackson Trilogy, perhaps he isn't entirely incorrect.
I'd like to see Jackson's take on it, if for no other reason than to see how he justifies Legolas being present in every scene.
>>44280389
I read that and momentarily blacked out.
Also my desk has developed teeth marks. I don't know if these things are connected.
>>44280389
>>44280496
Parts of the Silmarillion are anime as hell.
A silmarillion movie would have to be an entire series of movies to even be possible. Not to mention there is some stuff that would be almost impossible to depict/explain in a movie like the creation of the fucking universe. A lot of things also rely on massive infodumps to understand them.
I would accept something like a Children of Hurin movie, but telling the whole story of the Silmarills would be more trouble than its worth. Plus most people only care about the Hobbit and LOTR.
>>44276630
This could be pretty cool, assuming it allowed people to experiment with their own styles in each section.
But then again I think that lots of things should be done like the animatrix, doesn't necessarily make it a good idea.
>>44271949
even the short stories
even the tale of old tom bombadi going up the river
>>44280422
honestly i thought the hobbit started out alright but it did go to shit a bit
there was one good other adaption though the gba fellowship game it was not very true to the story but it was fun
except when you got stuck with very little health in moria on a single save file.
>>44280430
i chuckled
then i cried
>>44280430
He will just get Orlando Bloom to play Fingolfin.
>>44275345
Yeah, I'm sure we all know better than Tolkien's own fucking son
>>44278909
>HBO Serious
NO.
If anyone will cock it up, it's HBO. Imagine, they will cut all the battle scenes short, add whores and brothels in every possible scene, and trade in the actual visible magic and wizards for fedora-tier 'science.'
Then they'll kill off characters just because.
Then again, Hollywood is just as bad with this shit.
>>44280951
*Series, goddamn phone.
>>44280592
What is so complicated about the creation of the universe?
>>44281264
No visuals for half an hour.
Just music.
I think the Silmarillion is just too far removed from everything else LOTR to actually work. Unless it got changed massively (read:raped) the average movie goer just wouldn't get it. Just like how the Hobbit is a prequel to Lord of the Rings, this would be billed as the origin story or some shit and then when there is no Gandalf or Legolas or whoever, people just wouldn't take it well.
And this is to say nothing about the actual contents of the book.
>>44281273
>you now realize The Silmarillion would make a brilliant stage show
>>44271716
I want the same people who made samurai jack behind it. and Don Bluth.
>>44278855
Not sure i would like this applied to the silmarillion, but generally I do agree with you.
We need more art in our movies. Less formulaic explosion=money and more exploration of ideas and different mediums.
>>44279070
No need to change the ending, just slap on an epilogue showing Turin killing Morgoth at Dagor Dagorath.
Jackson would turn it into a "Sauron's Origin" trilogy.
>>44280635
You're not wrong about the Hobbit movies. Jackson is a competent filmmaker and he has a great team behind him. The production issues really caught up with them on the last one.
>>44271716
Nay to the fullest.
>>44280817
I mean, yeah. Tolkien's kid is kinda the worst.
Because the rights were sold we got three of the best movies ever made. I'd say it was worth all of the other less good stuff for that. Plus, it is kinda the best way to introduce millions of people to the series.
>>44283003
Also say what you will, but those books are a total slog to get through. The movies are legitimately the best way to hear the story.
>>44283021
last time i read the books were over ten years ago. i reread the lotr trilogy this summer and i was wary because of /tg/ saying that they're boring and tolkien is a shitty writer but i read them extremely fast. i read the 1st book in a 12-hour session.
If they did make it, what's the bets they made Feanor blond?
>>44283021
I enjoyed both the trilogy and the Silmarillion, but then I'm a history student minoring in Celtic Folklore.
>>44278855
>We've had the overly-serious epic takes, and seen how that screwed up the Hobbit.
That's not what screwed up The Hobbit. Jackson having to take over from Del Toro, needing to start filming basically immediately, and therefore having no time to prepare, and consequently having to make up the film as he went along, that's what fucked up The Hobbit.
They actually added more stupid kidsy shit in the film, you know.
>>44283138
Why would they do that?
>>44272082
What if he put a clause in the will?
He easily could have. They might wriggle out of it eventually of course, but it's possible he could hold the shittery off for a while that way.
Also, am I the only one who thinks that having all the Valar be as "try hard" and visually flashy as Morgoth is wrong?
I feel like he WOULD go in for the special effects and stuff, but some of them, just wouldn't.
I know they are divine beings and very important, but it does not seem in character for me for many of them to be so grandiose. Like, Gandalf is definitely coming from a "understated" place, but then that's really just sort of him and his quarter.
Whereas Sauruman, well, definitely the "magestic, possibly arrogant asshole" quarter, if not originally evil. He fell off the wagon/went bad where his folks back home never did.
>>44279587
>>Ahh, here's just about where Numenor used to be
That might actually work. "Ah Frodo and Bilbo, here lies the former great nation of Men, Numenor. Come, let me tell you of Numenor's rise, its hubris, and its fall when Men thought they could take by force the grace of the Valar."
>mfw
>>44283268
Except Gandalf was never with Bilbo and Frodo at the same time while traveling that far North up into Arnor to reminisce about Fornost and the Kingdom of Numenor.
>>44280396
>probably seal Jackson's fate to a George Lucas level.
He's already there. The prequels had a few redeeming qualities. The Hobbit trilogy had none.
>>44283254
do it like in that immortals movie where zeus et al came down from olympos looking just like men
You can't really make a film of the Silmarillion. As other have said, it's not one story. And it's not even a novel. It's like the bible or the prose or poetic Edda. You wouldn't make a film out of the whole bible or the whole Edda. You'd have to take a particular story. And then you'd need to adapt it, which would be a lot of work. The medium of epic poetry is really different from modern film or even novels. Making a film out of a poem is so much work you might as well be making something new. It can only ever really be inspired by, as opposed to a normal adaptation.
>>44283299
Uh, Fornost wasn't in Numenor. I think you might be confusing Numenor and Arnor. Numenor was an island.
Actually, this >>44283268 idea would work perfectly, because they probably sailed over Numenor's former location on their way to Valinor on the grey ship. Elrond and Galadriel would be there too.
>>44283387
>Elrond and Galadriel would be there too.
Elrond could pop in and mutter "Men are weak"
>>44283305
Nah, they're both terrible, but I'd say the Hobbit films rank a little higher.
That aside, I think the Lucas comparison is a little unfair to Jackson. Lucas had complete control over the prequels, he had all the time in the world, total creative freedom, and he still made three abysmal films. Hobbit had insurmountable production difficulties. It's really not fair to hold it up as being representative of Jackson as a director. If anything, it's impressive he did as good a job as he did.
It's still possible that The Lord of the Rings trilogy was bit of fluke, considering his other work, but he's till nowhere near the same level as Lucas. I mean, Lucas wasn't even responsible for the best parts of the original trilogy, even though he still likes to take the credit. You have to go a long way before you're on Lucas's level.
>>44271716
instead of a movie, make it a high-budget animated series.
>>44283491
Lucas having total creative freedom is the reason the prequels were shit.
It always is, you never give directors total freedom because unfiltered ideas are always terrible and everyone needs a good editor.
Have you ever looked at what Lucas wanted in the original trilogy?
>>44283567
>what Lucas wanted in the original trilogy
Consider my interest piqued. Care to give some examples?
>>44283637
Just look at some of the names he put into the prequels
Elan Sleazebaggano (drug dealer)
Kit Fisto
Dexter Jetster
>>44283657
Honestly, those seem pretty appropriate for Flash Gordon fanfic, which is what Star Wars is.
>>44283657
Kit Fisto ain't that bad, but yeah, the rest looks like he just opened a dictionary at random and added a few letters.
>>44283567
No, Lucas having total creative freedom, and being a hack, is why they were shit. Really good creators know they need an editor, and will willingly utilise one even when they have total creative freedom. Really good creators are capable of being critical of themselves and their ideas and know that a second opinion is extremely helpful to the creative process.
>>44271716
If there is a Silmarillion movie then would you take someone to view it on a date?
>>44283950
If I could find a girl that loved the Silmarillion as much as I do I'd never let go. We could go and watch the abomination and mourn together. It'd he magical.
Fingolfin with a piece of an axe in his skull.
Dorf-Elf Fanfic leading to the hatred between the two races.
The Two Lamps are just metaphorical lamps.
Fingolfin fighting Melkor will be a huge battle between whole armies, with giant worms and CGI-Orcs.
Gandalf shoehorned into every scene possible.
Hurin slays only one troll, then gets captured like a bitch.
Last King of Numenor is Aragorn 2.0, doesn't get trapped on Valinor, but dies as misunderstood anti-hero.
Ancalagon wouldn't be the largest being Arda has ever seen, just about the size of Smaug, his fall smashing the Thengorodrim is just metaphorical.
Melkor never builds Udun, starts right off with Angband.
Somehow, Glorfindel will reference a "Ranger in the north", even though it doesn't make any sense.
Just some of my predictions. You know at least some of it would happen.
$$$!!!1
>>44278029
Gotta make it a framed narrative "outside" a framed narrative.
>Have Oromë tell the first elves the Ainulindale/Valaquenta during the great journey.
>Have Miriel tell a young Feanor of the great journey.
>Have something tell the story of Feanor.
>Etc.
>Until you get to Elendil telling someone the Akallabeth
>And then maybe Aragorn telling Eldarion "of the Rings of Power and the Third Age".
The major choices are how you divvy up the story, who is the narrator, who is/are the listener(s), and during what context/period the story is being told.
I do think the Ainulindale should be the opening with narration from Oromë. Cut to a bunch of elves around a fire with Oromë in the center. This would be a slight "cold opening", as the audience (aka the uninformed movie/tv show watcher) doesn't know that Oromë is one of the Ainur in the opening sequence. You would then have elves ask for more of the story, who the Valar are exactly, the Maiar and Oromë would give a run down of each a la the Valaquenta. So the audience would figure out that this Oromë is kinda a bad ass.
The next part would be Miriel telling Feanor of the Great Journey, who stayed and who goes, the problem here is communicating what happened to the Sindar. Maybe Miriel "dies" at the end of the sequence, but that might be a little too convenient.
If she does die, it's an easy cut from a sad looking Feanor to someone narrating Feanor's story.
You can see the pattern. This setup allows for narration when it is needed AND it alleviates the vast time between some parts of the story.
>>44277044
one of my favourite songs ever
>>44284297
>Melkor never builds Udun, starts right off with Angband.
Very little is lost if this change is made.
>>44284297
God the Hobbit movies just killed all faith in Tolkien films, and I just saw the last one
>Somehow, Glorfindel will reference a "Ranger in the north"
Oh sweet god no
>>44283335
I hate this Silmarillion = the Bible meme.
The Silmarillion can be, infact, considered a single story, which on its most basic level is the story of Melkor vs the world. The Bible isn't like that AT ALL.
>>44284232
>If I could find a girl that loved the Silmarillion as much as I do I'd never let go.
>never let go
>screenshot was from School Days
You're doing this on purpose aren't you?
>>44283637
he wanted C-3PO to act like a sleazy car salesman
he wanted Boba Fett and Vader to be related
he was just going to have Obi-Wan disappear, his wife had to yell at him and tell him to kill the guy off
everyone was going to have a ligthsaber, and they were going to be called laser swords
>>44271716
>that picture
Where's the most important Valar? The author couldn't possibly have forgottenTulkamania!
>>44284438
Its more Silmarillion = Greek Mythos.
>>44282043
Way I see it, it's myth, treat it like it.
What's the worst that could happen, a bunch of people who saw bad films wouldn't read the Silmarillion?
>>44284424
Given how The Hobbit's production went, a forced Silmarillon would be even worse. LotR was a labour of love for Jackson & crew unlike The Hobbit.
>>44284438
not Old Testament. New Testament is basically Jesus vs. sin, though
>>44284504
>The author couldn't possibly have forgottenTulkamania!
I think you mean Macho Man Randy Tulkas
>>44284524
Why is it the better story got the worse moive?
>>44283021
>The movies are legitimately the best way to hear the story.
Actually, The Unfinished Spelling Errors of Bolkien are legitimately the best way to hear the story.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cARgxwaGBAY
There used to be somewhere you could download the whole set, it's something like two hours of terrible filk with terrible jokes, and it's glorious.
>>44284538
The Hobbit is not the better story, it's just the cozier narrative.
>>44284538
It had to do with the production people being a bit greedy. After reading about how filming went, it's easy to see how unhappy everyone was.
>>44284538
better story is debatable. It's certainly a very different type of story.
Which is also why Jackson fucked the Hobbit up so much. He wanted the same grand scale of LOTR, when Hobbit is supposed to be about how greatness is often found in the smallest of things
>>44284399
Very much is lost, because Melkor moving back into a demolished fortress he's already lost once, rather than building a new one even stronger and more twisted, would be fucking stupid.
>>44284594
>when Hobbit is supposed to be about how greatness is often found in the smallest of things
This. also was I the only one who got into a rango rustle at the fact Bard didn't do the black arrow monolauge before shooting Smaug, yet smaug couldn't shut up.
And whats the deal with the elf cucking?
>>44284576
>that pic
"Abloobloobloo I'm getting paid millions of dollars and I have to use my imagination for a little bit". Pic related
>>44284594
you couldn't get 3 movies if you didn't include the grand scale
>>44284637
there was a lot more cgi in the hobbit than in the lotr trilogy which much have frustrated him
>>44284576
Damn, that picture. Makes you wonder what would be so hard in bringing the Dorfs , bilbo and Gandalf into the same room and make it look good. It worked in LotR, so why not a good 10 years later?
>>44284630
those were actually the third and second most annoying things about the Smaug and Bard 'fight' for me, but they both lost out to Bard using his fucking son as a tripod for an arrow with steel fletching
>>44284672
>you couldn't get 3 movies if you didn't include the grand scale
are you saying that splitting it into 3 movies wasn't a stupid decision?
>>44284672
It takes longer to watch the movies than to read
>>44284719
no. i'm saying he fucked the hobbit by making it into more than 1 or 2 movies. i guess you implied that too but i had to read your post more thoroughly.
>>44284727
you have to read the appendices and other stuff to reach the same coverage as the movies but yeah
>>44283176
>They actually added more stupid kidsy shit in the film, you know.
Sure, but they also tried to make it have a dark tone like the LotR had.
Best and only Hobbit movie, right here
>>44283414
Then Galadriel pops in and explains precisely why her son in law is so bitter.
It would be interesting to see Galadriel developed more on screen, as it becomes clearer she's not really her saintly image but a dangerous, ambitious ancient aristocrat
>>44271716
Hard no.
As Colbert points out, very few people understand it, and dumbing it down would ruin it.
>>44272021
Hoping he fucking writes that shit into his will.
Put the rights with a fucking trust that doesn't have the authority to lease them to studios.
>>44284502
Ye gods...
>>44275068
>Mordor becomes Belka
>Barad-dur has a fucking superlaser
>>44284905
YOU GO MY LAD
>>44284905
I agree whole heartedly
>>44284576
>Olorin missed just a few lines of this verse
>it was weird, like the sonorous trappings of the universe went mute
>though he could still sense the fundament of Eä, the theme was so quiet and weak, the secret flame was flickering low
>he sighed, and picked up where he could remember the lines, and returned to the fullness of the world
>>44284637
That looks more like
>*groans Britishly*
>Pete, keep telling me how to emote at the tennis ball, c'mon, Pete, tell me one more time.
>so I guess this is the state of film today
>cant post-production just edit in a fuck for me to give?
>>44284438
It's not a meme. Even if it's wrong, it's not a meme. Learn what words mean, okay?
And the bible, on "it's most basic level" is the story of god and his interactions with humanity. But if you aren't being ridiculously, laughably, reductionist then no, it's not just one story, and neither is the Silmarillion.
>>44285143
>*groans Britishly*
>>44284836
True, but that's not why it's bad. That could have worked. It wouldn't have been very faithful, but that doesn't mean it would have been bad. In fact, even Tolkien at one time started rewriting the Hobbit to match the darker tone of The Lord of the Rings. He eventually decided it would be too much work and settled for only rewriting a single chapter, the one with Gollum in it.
A serious tone, done well, would have been good. A lighter tone, done well, would have been. we didn't get wither of those things, because he was literally making as he went, because he had to.
You want to know the real reason why they split it into three films instead of two? Because lopping off the end of the second film and releasing it a year later gave them more time to plan it.
See here:
http://birthmoviesdeath.com/2015/11/19/this-is-why-the-hobbit-movies-were-so-bad
>>44285563
as much as I hate Ctrl Alt Del, this is almost definitely the actual reason for the trilogy
>>44284630
I suppose when you've paid flibbledick cabbagepatch a lot of money to crawl around your recording booth like a gecko you kind of want to get your money's worth.
Protip: If you're going to apply a jillion and one audio effects to an actor's voice, just hire a cheaper actor because no one will know who it is.
>>44284502
His Wife really is the unsung hero of the franchise.
Except Lucas will freely admit the OT wouldn't have been nearly as good if she wasn't around to say "Honey, that's retarded."
>>44271716
Bëor and his chasing DAT sweet elf pucci
Fëanor and him being and edgy, yet skilled crafter
As much as they need to build up the battle of many tears
I REALLY want to see Turin turambar in their
Of course we need the numinorians and the valaquenta in their entire storyarcs...
Maybe the seige of gondolin include Ölorin learning to be the great angel mithrandír
>>44286492
>his chasing
>pucci
>being and edgy
>their
>numinorians
>seige
>gondolin-gandalf
what
>>44284232
As long as you're willing to put up with bad Melkor/Sauron fanfiction then it's not too hard to find a grill who likes the Silmarillion.
>>44284673
3D fucks up everything that's good and wonderful. No, seriously. In order to have actors in the same set yet appear as different sizes, you have to do some brilliant camera and set trickery.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QWMFpxkGO_s
But because the hobbit movies had to be done in 3D to milk more shekels out of it, you can't do the trick anymore. If you had two cameras, you'd see past the illusion at either side.
>>44285163
>meme
No it is, infact, a meme.
>an idea, behavior, or style that spreads from person to person within a culture
Someone came up with the idea that Silm = Bible. Maybe it was based on the Ainulindale resembling Genesis or whatever, either way the connection was made and then massively construed. And then once reading it, someone else decided that "yeah that makes sense to me, even though I've only done a single read-through and only read every other word, and I'm a giant idiot" and it grew from there.
>And the bible, on "it's most basic level" is the story of god and his interactions with humanity. But if you aren't being ridiculously, laughably, reductionist then no, it's not just one story, and neither is the Silmarillion.
So you can't see how a list of interactions with God is different from a list of interactions with the personification of evil in the world? Like maybe if the Bible was about defying Satan your argument would stand up, but its not. Satan is mentioned some 13 times, no one tries to defeat him.
>>44275625
epic reddit post, my /v/ /b/rother
>>44284504
if it ever gets adapted, they better have a pro wrestler play him. or at least someone who can do a good macho man impression.
>>44284504
>Tulkamania
That alone would make the movie worth watching.
>>44291787
TULKMANIA!
ERUSDAY!
ERUSDAY!
ERUSDAY!
GOLDEN TULKAS AND HUNTSMAN OROME FIGHT MORGOTH AND THE BALROG SQUAD! THE BATTLEFIELD AT UTUMNO WILL BE SHATTERED IN THE ACTION AS THE SHINNING DUO FACE DOWN THE KING OF MIGHT!
THRILLS AS THE GOLDEN GRAPPLER SUPLEXES EVIL!
CHILLS EHEN MELKOR DROPS THE HAMMER OF THE UNDERWORLD!
TICKETS AVAILABLE IN VALIMAR, TIRION, MORIA, AND UMBAR!
BE THERE!
>>44284637
Some choose their jobs based on enjoyment, not paycheck.
>>44284502
>"No, I AM your father. Also, Boba Fett is your uncle."
>>44286390
Lucas was pretty much scrambled once she left in that department. To give him some credit though, he sort of got things back together when he did the Clone Wars TV series and had to actually have his ideas filtered through multiple directors. Too bad that couldn't have happened with the actual Episode II.
>>44286390
Too bad she wasn't around for the Prequel trilogy.
>>44284948
back to lotr for a moment, gollum, frodo and sam speeding through the tunnels, caves, lava tubes of mount doom to drop the ring.
"Frodo, now! Drop it into the flames!" "Pickle? After all this...?"
>>44283657
Or names he put in the OT:
Luke Skywalker
Han Solo
Darth Vader
>>44284348
This sounds great, actually.
>>44282887
i cant remember which one it was but the scene with legolas running along the falling stones looked like they only did one take and said good enough.
>>44291702
>>44275625
NO! BAD! NOT IN THE /tg/!
You want to do that, you go OUTSIDE!
>>44284297
i can see them doing some of those things but surely they wouldn't change anything to a metaphor
>>44298617
Look, if they managed to mess up 200-page children's book, what on Earth or in Middle-Earth makes you think that they'd do anything like a good job with what is essentially a textbook? A pretty arcane one, at that.
>>44298642
oh god your right
>>44284502
>they were going to be called laser swords
That's what they're called in german...
'Lichtschwert' or 'Laserschwert' which means light sword or laser sword
>>44285143
He is a trained stage actor, they emote with objects and people that are not there all the time.
The reason he was crying in that scene was a general frustration with his own performance, which can stem from a whole lot of reasons. But the anti-cgi crowd always spins it the other way.
>>44296331
Darth Vader being luke's father was never a big surprise to me as a kid.
>Vader is the dutch word for Father
>Child brain thought he was called Dark Vader
>>44300410
>general frustration with his own performance
http://www.themarysue.com/ian-mckellen-hobbit-cry/
>This is not why I became an actor
Yeah dude I'm sure he was just frustrated with his own performance.
You're retarded.
>>44300478
A statement he later attributed to general tiredness and stress and not necessary a big problem with the filming.
And once again, he also does theater which requires far more imagination.
>>44278298
This. I'm not an animé fan, but you need some cartoonishness because the silmarillion is myth. It can't be too real-looking. Anime is perfect for that.
But hopefully it won't happen at all. Peter Jackson did a good Fellowship movie bit they've gotten steadily worse since.
>>44300532
>A prepared statement he gave to cover his ass so he doesn't lose work trumps an emotional breakdown he had when he was stressed to his breaking point and thought no one could hear him
k
>>44273752
I really hate this picture. Ancalagon was big, even the biggest thing ever seen in Arda. But not like *that* image. That's a stupid comparison based on a painting that's not even very good.
>>44301720
Ancalagon fell on three mountains and crushed them.
He was big.
>>44296331
>Darth Vader
Invader, Insidious, and Luke & Leia's son, Darth Cest.
>>44300617
An Unexpected Journey wasn't THAT bad....
>>44284905
>dwarves with real beards
that sounds right
>>44285626
No, the real reason is what I said. A terrible and unfunny webcomic is not evidence to the contrary.
>>44301824
One should be careful about being too literate with Silmarillion, and if we're talking "making sense" then it makes no sense at all for an organic being of that size to destroy a mountain even if it's a tenth its size. You jump on a rock a tenth your size, see if it breaks.
>>44300915
The things you say during stressful moments aren't always the most accurate explanation for why you're stressed. Imagine how easy life would be otherwise: something bothers you, and whatever slips out while you're bothered is a perfectly accurate analysis of what's going on in your psyche.
>>44290904
Melkor is actually absent from a large chunk of the silmariliion. You're just full of shit.
And no, you repeatedly spouting bullshit and saying "it's a meme" doesn't make it a meme. It's an idea, one you irrationally disagree with. Your disagreement doesn't make it a meme.
Someone without learning disabilities would easily see that one book of mythology containing multiple stories, dealing with many different characters over a vast timescale, including a story of the creation of the world and gods and angels as well as mortals who interact with the divine is, in fact, quite similar to another book of mythology containing multiple stories, dealing with many different characters over a vast timescale, including a story of the creation of the world and gods and angels as well as mortals who interact with he divine.
>>44292989
Clone wars is still pretty bad, m8.
>>44302354
You're delusional.
>>44283003
>we got three of the best movies ever made
No. No. Just no. The first film was decent and everything after that sucked balls.
>>44302603
No, I'm right. What you say or when when you're angry or drunk is not "the real you" either.
>>44301720
>>44301824
There is actually a bit of debate about if he was that big. The core problem is that in several different publications there are variations in punctuation. This is the "eats, shoots, and leaves" problem.
A panda walks into a café. He orders a sandwich, eats it, then draws a gun and shoots everyone.
"Why?" asks the surviving waiter, as the panda makes towards the exit. The panda produces a badly punctuated wildlife manual and tosses it over his shoulder.
"Well, I'm a panda," he says. "Look it up."
The waiter turns to the entry in the manual and, sure enough, finds an explanation. "Panda. Large black-and-white bear-like mammal, native to China. Eats, shoots and leaves."
so the context of a sentence can be very different from a single comma. In the case of Ancalagon and Thangordrim. The bit from the silmarilion reads:
Before the rising of the sun Earendil slew Ancalagon the Black, the mightiest of the dragon-host, and cast him from the sky; and he fell upon the towers of Thangorodrim, and they were broken in his ruin.
It could be that the dragon fell, and his falling is what destroyed the towers, or the the sentence is just describing the series of events "Earendil killed the dragon, the dragon fell onto the fortress, and then the fortress was destroyed (because the enemy was defeated)"
This is further complicated because the "Towers of Thangorodrim" could mean three different things. The volcanic peaks of the mountains themselves, or the constructed towers of the fortress at the mountains base, or the towers could have been carved through the mountain, and capped the mountain peaks. Much like Durin's Tower, at the top of the mountain Celebdil. There was a staircase that lead all the way from the bottom of Moria up through the mountain, and this was where Gandalf killed the Balrog.
So Ancalagon might have been the size of a mountain, but probably wasn't because no other creature comes close to being a fraction that size.
>>44302314
The First Age didn't make any sense at all, and Ancalagon was Morgoth's equivalent of a nuclear weapon.
Trying to argue for realism when considering the giant dragon who was killed by a flying ship piloted by angels and super-elves, and captained by a half-elf wearing Venus as a hat, during a war so horrific in it's scale that it sunk a continent, strikes me as hopelessly quaint.
>>44302685
Uh, Middle-Earth didn't sink.
>>44302685
>Trying to argue for realism when considering the giant dragon who was killed by a flying ship piloted by angels and super-elves, and captained by a half-elf wearing Venus as a hat, during a war so horrific in it's scale that it sunk a continent, strikes me as hopelessly quaint.
But god forbid the dreaded taint of anime be allowed to contaminate the purity of J R R Tolkien's epic, Dragonball Z.
*feanor screams for a week to power up*
>>44302732
Uh, they didn't say it did?
>>44302753
>during a war so horrific in it's scale that it sunk a continent
I suppose that could have been a typo of "shrunk".
>>44271716
I hope not. God I hope not.
The way things are going we would have african Vanyar, lesbian maiar, trasngender orcs and the whole thing would be a plataform for PC agenda.
I want it to be kept safe from all this bullshit. They already infected harry potter and the hobbit movies, keep the Silmarillion safe please.
>>44283491
>Lucas had complete control over the prequels, he had all the time in the world, total creative freedom, and he still made three abysmal films.
He didn't make terrible films despite all that, he made terrible because of all that. He had just as many terrible ideas when making the original trilogy with the difference being that he didn't have the resources to put in all the special effects he wanted and did have a whole crew of people who were willing to tell him no.
The situation is depressingly similar to Jackson's who was very constrained when making the Fellowship and was then immediately given way more money to "improve" it's sequels once it turned out to not be a flop, which he then used to shot them up with unnecessary CGI. By the time of The Hobbit, do you really think any one person had the balls to question his decisions? Of course not, they admired him way too much for that. Jackson has always been an effects geek but when he was a nobody that the studio didn't want to waste money on he actually had to get creative and that led to some pretty decent films.
>>44302744
That does sound like feanor. He would do it even if achieved nothing.
Feanor once caused a political clusterfuck because people were changing the pronunciation of words from the traditional mode.
>>44302794
Idris Alba playing Fëanor.
Start petition!
#blackfeanor
The Silmarillion is an unreadable bible like tome and literally nothing bad can come of adapting it because there's nothing to ruin in the first place.
Stop whining.
>>44302779
>>44302732
>>44302779
They sunk beleriand. It's entirely underwater now. They fucked it up so bad it cracked apart and sunk into the sea in a shattered, magma pitted wreck
>>44302779
It sunk Beleriand. That's a continent the size of europe or india.
>>44302836
Please don't waste him on shitty characters.
>>44302986
(he should be playing Olórin)
>>44278029
Just make it literal Tolkien wishbone, but 100% serious, I would happily die laughing.
