>An inexperienced rock thrower from the Stonegash tribe
Assuming this man lives long enough to become a a high-level warrior, what kinds of weapon upgrade might we expect? What would a rock upgrade path look like?
Vorpal rocks.
>>43711316
Bigger rocks.
balls of steel
>>43711278
> Longer range on rocks.
> Rocks that curve to hit opens.
> Rocks that defy the laws of physics (i.e. You hit a wall, the wall crumples and the rock keeps going.)
> Flaming rocks.
> Rocks that explode with the force of hand grenades.
> Chain-explosion rocks; The rock blows up, and each fragment also blows up whatever it touches.
> Call the Greater Rock: Summons a meteorite from the skies.
Well obviously he'd go the hulking hurler path and start throwing boulders at everything.
Why would you need an upgrade? Rocks are pretty much perfect as is.
Stone Golems.
>>43711278
He chooses to get a variety of rocks for different situations.
Things like limestone, talc, or even volcanic rocks.
>>43711278
It would become a Orkish rok.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B_3TlrZLpQ0
>>43711349
This
>>43711364
>Rocks that return after being thrown
>Rocks that float
>Rocks that absorb spells
>Rocks that multiply after every throw
>A rock that you can add other rocks to and when it hits a target all the rocks Inside it explode outward (like a bottomless bag of holding only for rocks).
>>43711379
>Not wanting rocks of varying weights, shapes, and sizes for different jobs
>>43711428
>the ability to throw rocks to intercept other thrown rocks mid-flight
>>43711278
A sling. A giant sling, perhaps, but a sling nonetheless.
>>43711428
>>A rock that you can add other rocks to and when it hits a target all the rocks Inside it explode outward (like a bottomless bag of holding only for rocks).
Someone find the greentext about that one thing that did this except with arrows.
>>43711349
Thread was over at this point. Why does it keep going?
>About to replenish rockpile
>>43711448
The world descends into chaos as the only people capable of stopping high-level rock throwers are other high-level rock throwers with this ability. Every nation starts training as many rock throwers as they can and line them up on their borders, ready to intercept the rocks of other countries and to retaliate in turn.
>>43711401
Awesome stuff, thank you!
>>43711278
He hurts eldtrich abominations easily now.
>>43711433
>Needing different rocks for different jobs
>Needing to carry rocks around
>Not being able to just pick a rock up and do whatever the fuck you need to do
Stay pleb.
Behold his final weapon.
>Fork in the rock upgrade path
>Stalagmites or Stalactites
wat do
>>43711599
So when are they changing his nickname to "The Roid"?
>>43711364
>>43711428
>flash powder rocks that blind on contact after thrown
>lightning rocks that chain lightning in an area around them
>rocks that explode into poisonous smoke
>>43711606
Stalagmite lets you throw rocks into the ground that become traps. Stalactite gives you increased anti-air power and range.
You gain the ability to lift up tectonic plates and throw them at people.
>>43711623
When he becomes the mountain.
>1/2
>>43711658
Or the last picture.
>>43711490
Stone Cold War: the tabletop game of prehistoric military hegemony.
>>43711568
>using whatever random tool is lying around is Patrician
Enjoy painting your cave with a stick loser, I'm going to be busy making your "wife" my latest rock-ubine
>>43711278
Why wouldn't he just upgrade to throwing Axes or Javelins
>>43711380
I literally found my jaw dropped open at reading this.
>>43713529
Because they are not made from the bones of the sacred earth.
The fruits of the effeminate nature spirits are fit only as fodder for the mighty stone men; for a warrior to bear a weapon made from anything other than stone would defile both his own spirit and the sacred earth.
>>43713481
If your rock isn't large enough and your control isn't fine enough to handle any problem which comes your way, then you are certainly no patrician. But I can tell from the fact that you would rather waste your time getting your rocks off with my wife than practice your rock throwing skills.
>>43713719
>the earth is sacred
>therefore we need to throw it
Right, right, I follow you. Is there anything else which happens to be sacred? The bones of our ancestors, anything along those lines?
Behold, the final level of rock throwers. You achieve such power you become a rock.
>>43713796
I bet ceremonial rocks would have cool fossils embedded in them.
>>43711754
>Fell's Five
Awww yeah nigga.tfw Fell's Five will never be continued.
>>43713849
Anon, ceremonial rocks are fossils of rock throwers.
>>43713903
Yeah, but only mythically-speaking.
>>43713760
Being that we Stonegash men are born weak avatars of the nature spirits, we would not be so bold as to defile the sacred earth by allowing the weak flesh of our dead to be interred within it. The flesh of those who showed true and honourable dedicstion to the stone is prepared in an honourary meal; the bones are then buried, and the ashes used to paint the deceased's deeds upon their birth stone: the first rock they touch after exiting the womb. The painted rock is then put on display in the open sky. In time, the rain will wash away the ashes, leaving the rock behind in a final display of the weakness of the mortal and the undying strength of the stone. Only then will the man's soul be truly cleansed and fit to make its journey to the sacred earth.
>>43713983
I can roll with that.
When the Great Spirit gave breath to the earth, he first shaped clay and dirt to make the lesser tribes. But the Stonegash tribe, he hewed us from solid rock and it is to rock that we will one day return. Let the other tribes fool about with wooden weaponry. We know where our true roots are.
>>43714000
>cannibalism
Like, ew. Can't we just, I dunno, dump them in the ocean?
>>43711278
He throws the Great One. Fastball special.
>>43713866
It could be. The writer just stopped because he wanted to focus on his TV show, if he decides to come back they've said they'll let him continue it.
More rocks.
>>43714124
The great water spirit is the brother of the sacred earth, locked in an eternal struggle. To give the souls of the faithful to the water spirit would be to damn them to an eternity of slavery in service against the sacred earth.
>Being a rock thrower
>Not a stone thrower
>mfw
>>43714000
Why don't the Stonegash just hurl their dead into the sky?
Given they spend their entire lives throwing gigantic rocks, they'd probably be able to make a corpse achieve escape velocity.
>>43714251
Well eating them is no solution either. They're still gonna come out again, and then what do we do with them?
>>43714282
You're off your rocker m8.
>>43714349
>throwing the deceased into the rockless void
You are a sick sick person.
It is said before the Sacred Earth Spirit existed, there was a Great Spirit who was a giant rock in the vast void of nothingness. This stone being looked at the void and decided to fill the void. He injured himself and smaller chunks of himself filled the void with these fragments of the Spirit. Fragments with its tears would later become each world's Great Water Spirit. Our Sacred Earth is a fragment of the Great Spirit. The Great Spirit will return all fragments of itself one day if all of creation becomes too evil. The Great Spirit sends meteoroids as a message. Change your vile ways or be destroyed. Sometimes the Great Spirit destroys world because the world needs a merciful death. Sometimes meteoroids also serve as a warning for dark times to come. If a meteoroid passes a world, the Great Spirit is saying "Nice work".
>>43711278
>>43711349
two rocks.
rocks with chain
more rocks.
>>43714423
Forgot my picture.
>>43711278
carry more rocks
throw more bigger rocks
>>43714387
But the sky is full of rocks! City-man show me once, sky full of big, big, BIG rocks! City-man say big rocks sometimes make new worlds!
If I die, I wish to join the sky-rocks, so that I can be part of a new world someday.
>>43711278
>>43711278
Bigger rocks
Harder rocks
Magic rocks
Rocks engraved with explosive runes
Returning rocks
Non-returning rocks
Angry rocks
Small rocks thrown very, very hard
Hollow rocks filled with various things
Hand-crafted adamantium rocks
Trick rocks
Very large rocks so small party members can hide behind them
Thunderstones
>>43714349
I also like this idea because of the possibility that the Stonegash aren't actually throwing the dead into space - they're all landing thousands of miles away, near a city whose inhabitants are mystified by the random barbarian corpses that occasionally fall out of the sky.
>>43714452
City-man is full of lies. He know not the greatness of the earth and covers it with man-made blasphemous materials, and uses boomsticks to break apart the earth when he feels it is in the way. He serves the endless void, and his soul has become a void as a result, and all his life is spent spreading that hunger, as he devours all around him in his search to fill it.
Sharpened rocks attached to sticks.
>>43711704
>>43711754
Is that the D&D comic?
>>43714535
> Tiny rock
> Using stick at all
Heresy
>>43714349
>they'd probably be able to make a corpse achieve escape velocity
Does the Stonegash Space Program employ necromancers to scout for habitable worlds?
>>43714870
And once they find onethey throw this planet at it
![Caber%20Toss%20b%20low%20res[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/7BmA70m.jpg "Caber%20Toss%20b%20low%20res[1].jpg")
He upgrades about mid level from Rocks to Cabers
>>43715448
>woodshit
>>43715448
>Toss
>Not throw
>Log
>Not rock
>Wearing undergarments
Nice try, elfgirl.
>>43715611
>>43715711
>The barabarian from Stonegash discovers a civilization which competes by tossing stone obelisks.
>>43715837
I think he gets humbled or finds his civilization in the future.
>>43715837
>Arm-brothers, we can learn things from the Stonetower tribe. Let us join our families with theirs and exchange gifts.
>>43716039
>Yes, let us take up arms with them against the Woodswingers and prove the dominance of the Earth!
>>43716039
The gifts are allsocks
>>43711278
Resistance: Kidney Stones
Followed by
Summon: Kidney Stones
>>43716194
As long as there's no kneesocks like >>43715448
Don't want to be confused with a guy who underarms posts.
>>43716419
Don't even joke about that.
>>43716509
Stay hydrated puppers
>>43716509
I joke because I know the pain. Had my first one on the morning of a Geology final in college. I threw up from the pain.
I was still hopped up on morphine when I went to take the exam that afternoon.
>>43716509
>>43711278
Master the rock within yourself. Impossibly high constitution. Immune to a number of effects. Constant stoneskin. Basically a rock golem in human form.
>>43711278
Well, why stick to just rocks? Like have him throw little rocks first, then heavier rocks. But after heavier rocks open up his table in terms of the weapons he's allowed to take. Idk if any of you work out, but there are exercises I see people do in the gym that are like throwing heavy rocks but much safer. So once the guy becomes much stronger and more accurate with all that heavy rock throwing give him more practical options as s/he slowly becomes a badass.
>>43711428
>Huge hollow rocks that contain a squadron of gnomes who then proceed to throw smaller rocks
>>43711490
Avatar?
Dragon bezoar.
>>43716535
there's a joke there, somewhere. Wish I had the stones to make one.
>>43715448
>literally playing with massive wood
Get out of here leafboy, go have anal intercourse with your elven patriarch
>>43716603
>Using any weapons besides those given to us by the Sacred Earth
Disgraceful.
In fact, there are some more conservative sects of Stonegash men who even view the sharpening and refining of stone heretical.
>>43711380
Does this count? Is it fair?
>>43711373
Eventually he'd get to be cosmic level and could stand on his hands and throw a planet.
>>43711433
What kind of different jobs are there?
>>43716834
You do know that weapons are made by resources given to us by the Sacred Earth, right? What about ripping out a huge trunk, take a huge boulder, put them together and make a mace? No sharpening and refining here. Boulder is honestly optional if the trunk if clubby enough.
>>43711490
So wait, wouldn't this mean only the highest level rock thrower wins all the time? Unless there's variety.
>>43716509
Why does this one look so fucking sharp?
>>43717055
Because they all are.
Also the blood.
>>43717055
Because Khorne cares not from where the blood flows.
>>43716944
Utilizing anything given by the effeminate nature spirits is absolutely degenerate.
There is only stone.
>>43714099
I don't know why I expected the gif to move
>>43717055
its an uric stone.
Forms from dehydration. Apparently there are different stone types!
COLLECT THEM ALL
>>43716509
MY DICK SHRIVELED
i've never had one
I'm scared anon
>>43718299
Just drink a lot of water and you'll be okay.
>>43718319
I'm addicted to Soda I'm doomed
>>43718319
Doesn't something bad happen from drinking too much water too?
>>43716509
Brb drinking water.
>>43718350
You die from Water Poisoning.
Everything in moderation my friend
>>43718330
https://www.kidney.org/atoz/content/kidneystones_prevent
>>43718350
Your electrolytes get shorted out which leads to hyponatremia (Sodium deficiency).
Sodium is needed for the gated channels for your cells to function. Same with Potassium, you need both to be healthy.
> Fist rock
> Rock splinters
> Rocks of pure energy, no need to refill
>rock for fake necklace
>rock that send textes
>rock that make breakfast
>rock that sign breastes
>rock that straight festive
>rock with six senses
>rock that hate texas
>rock that wear vestes
>>43711278
Smooth, aerodynamic spheres of rock. And one of those things used in Jai-Alai to throw balls really fast
>>43711278
Mobile siege tower to drop rocks from
>>43711278
Indestructible artifact sphere/cube.
Cannonballs, with or without explosives inside
Oversized throwing weapons.
Bundles of alchemists fire or acid or poison.
Smaller party members.
If you manage to upgrade to a sling, you could load it up with debris and have a grapeshot effect.
>>43713796
And then you throw yourself.
>>43714602
Fell's Five. Best damn D&D comic there ever was.
Staff sling.
>>43718965
Replace axes with rocks, basically.
Rock that shoots smaller rocks
Rock with elemental damage
Rock that has a handle for close combat
Rock that is actually a chain of a lot of small rocks with one really big rock on the end
Rockcrafting
Rock. Form of sharp
Rock. Form of cube
Rock. Form of spear
Rock armor
Smiting rock
Rock of law
Rock powder, which explodes
One way messenger rock, range: short
Lesser distract
Greater distract
Greater longe range sap
Pet rock
Familiar: rock
Summon golem of rocks
Summon big rock
Rock throw
Rock drop
Rock toss
Rock that climbs on rocks
Epic steed: massive rock
1 rock 2 rock red rock blue rock
Rockscaliber
Rock of imminent amnesia
Rock of emergency stuns
Rock of disintegrate...only works on glass
Rock that rolls
>>43721218
>Rockscaliber
Whosoever pulls this rock from the stone will be crowned the next king of Bedrock.
>>43716604
>Balsawood rocks filled with flies.
>>43721218
> Summon Glacier
You remain in control of the glacier so long as it exists or you're alive. It can be issued specific commands, that lay within it's ability. (Go west, go south). It may not be used in an attack. Mainly used by ageless beings to carve out their own lands.
> Stoneseige
3d6 medium sized rocks are ripped from the Earth and hurled at an enemy dealing 2d8+4 blunt damage per rock
> Bone of the earth
You call for them, and the earth shrouds you in it's protection. Rocks burst forth from the ground and form armor over your skin, granting +8AC and full cover against ranged attacks.
> Tectonic shift
The ground swallows you, then begins to shake. All manmade structures made from mundane materials within 1000 feet crumble to the earth. Any enemy standing in or within 10 feet of the structure take damage as if from a falling rocks trap. Afterwhich you emerge from the ground unphased.
> Rockshift
You turn into a rock, losing all forms of consciousness, levels, and abilities. The size of the rock you form is determined by your level when you rockshift. Rockshift is a permanent spell. Your body is unrecoverable, and your soul becomes one with the earth, unable to be reincarnated.
>>43716914
Need to capture a target without killing them
>Small smooth rock
Need to bridge a Fjord.
>Large Square rock
Need to deliver a message
>Painted rock
The question here is why would you ever need a wizard when you have rocks?
A Palantir to scry new targets for throwing.
>>43711657
Are Lightning powers just an automatic side effect to rock throwing?
>>43721339
Throwing termite mounds filled with angry fire ants.
>>43711278
Stone Tablets
>>43721394
I was planning on doing a "lithomancer" class (basically a druid with abilities exclusively focused on rocks; shaping stone, summoning earth elementals, hardening your skin to stone etc.). This gave me some ideas.
>>43721421
>Using magic
>Not your own rock throwing ability.
>>43718273
it actually looks more like an oxalate kidney stone. I've been unfortunate to pass a few myself. They're fairly common if you drink a lot of tea. And I sadly drink a lot of tea.
Also not all kidney stones are jagged.
>>43721245
>Some guy put a magical rock aroud a sword
>Only the chosen one can separate the two and use rockscalibur
>>43721440
Holy shit. I drink a lot of tea as well. Now I won't be able to enjoy tea without worrying about jagged piss-rocks.
>>43711278
basically pic realated
I found a long lost member of the Stonegash tribe
https://youtu.be/htmua9kSAig
>>43711364
>> Call the Greater Rock: Summons a meteorite from the skies.
>Summons a meteorite from the skies.
not
>Summons The Rock
you had ONE JOB
>>43711380
Oh yes indeed.
Buys custom hobbit sized stone golems off a Mage.
They hop into his hand on command, bunch up and he fastball specials them into the gut of an enemy.
Then unfurl hold on to the target and start punching them in the crotch.
Beautiful carnage from every shot.
Afterwards your ammunition runs back to you with an Armful of the targets belongings ready to fly again.
>>43716627
Underrated
