Decent turnout for a Thursday night. By the looks of things, not a lot of wagecucks in the audience. Hell, who can blame them? After going Monday through Thursday, I'd be pretty fucking beat too. One more day for 'em though, then they get that nice two-day break they've been looking forward to.
...unless their boss calls them. That'd fucking suck. Not a feeling I know though, thank God. Am I right? Who in their right mind would honestly put up with that? Aaaanything for the dollar, anything for the almighty, all-knowing, all-accessing dollar...that we NEETs get as a check in the mail.
The funny thing about wagecucks is that so often they're expecting sex. You might as well use the term sexcuck on them but honestly, their life is cucked enough as it is. Shit, how much fucking cucking can one man even take? You'd figure there's some kind of cucking limit that a guy can handle, like they've reached maximum cuck, but wagecucks just keep pushing that limit. If things go their way they'll be at the top of the cuck hierarchy, well, if they do enough overtime.
Last time I saw a wagecuck I was in a public bathroom and the poor motherfucker was sipping on cough syrup like it was a fine scotch.
But really though, how frustrating must it be, to come home after a long day's work, seek to enter your woman's sweet embrace and make passionate love to her, only to be told
"Sorry hon, I'm just a bit too tired tonight."
Fucking hell man, make tallies of how often she pulls that shit. Then again, when you have the passion sucked out of you, naturally your woman's not going to feel much of a sexual spark for you. It's like there are these zones you can enter, where you stay in them for so long, let's say around eight hours, and when you leave, BOOM, all the passion's been sucked right out of you. And sadly that's the ONLY type of sucking the wagecuck gets.
Oh, wait a second, those zones have a name. They're called cubicles. You guys are fucking awesome, thank you!
Hahaha
WAGIES DEVISTATED! WAGIES BTFO! WAGIES ON SUICIDE WATCH! THE ABSOLUTE MADNESS OF IT ALL! THIS MAN HAS ENDED WAGEKEKS FOR GOOD!
>>25066231
I don't get why any of this guy's material can be considered funny. I can't believe I took a sick day for this shit.
im a wagecuck but dont have a gf and dont like my job, and i have no friends and hate my life
Hahaha, this guy's a riot!
*whistles*
Tick tock wagecucks
You have 30 seconds to sneak your lunch before Mr.Goldtseen sees you.
Whats that? Not enough time? Poor wagecuck you should find some more time!
me you ask? Well i'll be applying another glaze on my roasted hog I have been monitoring all day.
Learning different foods one of my hobbies I like to do while you are busy wasting your life away at work.
Whats that honey? Of course I'll break out some wine! Why not!
We have alll the tiiimme in the woooooooorld
>All
>the
>time
>in
>the
>world
>>25066231
Tell the one about Subway
>>25066414
>miserable wagecuck
what else is new?
>>25066414
That's a shame wagecuck. Let me guess, no time? Depressed? Stressed from overworking? Perhaps exhausted due to early wake ups and late sleeps? Maybe even physically ill due of poor diet of TV dinners?
Why look at the time! Better get ready to clock off time for you to drive in traffic home to your TV dinner.
Don't forget to iron that shirt before you sleep.
What about me? Well I will be attending the new hot flick in the cinema. There is a late night showing which I will be happy to see since I have no bed time.
Maybe afterwards I will treat myself to some late night ice cream.
I can afford a naughty treat because I am physically in shape spending at least an hour of my day in the gym.
Try not to notice that bald spot wagecuck in the mirror on the way home. Stress must be getting to you.
Can you do a wagecuck impression?
>>25066231
Hey, hey fuzzy snail! I think your jokes need a little WORK! Oh wait, you don't have any! Hahahahahaha!
Thisis gut-bustingly funny. Well done
>>25066368
>I can't believe I took a sick day for this shit.
You know what I call a sick day wagecuck? A day. Sure I might be a little sick, a little tired, but it's still a day. Like today is a day. Like tomorrow is a day. What else do you have, vacation days?
NEETs call that 'everyday.'
>>25066735
HOW DARE YOU
I'M G-GETTING THE M-MANAGER
the jokes on you, i'm working over the weekend.
tfw my boss actually is jewish
>>25066654
Here's my impression of the Neet
"WAH, WAH BABY WANT
TENDIES, WAH BABY WANT TO CUDDLE WITH MOMMY, CUDDLE WITH BABY. GIVE BABY MONEY WAHHHH."
>>25066780
>working
>over the weekend
>>working
The joke truly is on us, wagesack
>>25066644
>Depressed
yep
>Stresses from overwork
yea
>early wake up and late sleep
yea, wake up at 5:30 sleep at 9 pm
>poor diet
yeah, it consist of this frozen chicken pasta that i really like and ham sandwhiches, and no breakfest
I dont usually iron my shirts but I do gotta wear a uncomfortable uniform
wish i had a easy life but its work or die for me, theres no way i can get neetbux
actually, I have a history of sever diagnoses depression and extreme anxiety, and Ive been taking anti depressants since I was 15. is there a way I could become neet? Im really unhappy and i know these are b8 threads but they ring true
>>25066654
Oh no it's 5am already?? Another day another dollar I can't spend.
>Where's my coffee I am about to pass out?
>Avoid mirror again because my face is looking a leather belt
>No time to poop and eat this morning, i must pick one or the other
>Has this hair always been there?
>Forgot to shave again, goldsteen is going to dock my pay
>Traffic as usual. Hope i don't pass out
>What if just drove into that wall
Glad I came to this thread. Good job cop, top stand up neet.6 months of neetdom now, how can I start neetposting?
>>25066801
Here's my impression of the wagecuck
"I'm working overtime. My feet hurt. I need to pick up some aspirin on my way home. Gotta do something about my sore back. My wife won't pick up my calls."
>>25066735
>>25066806
Hey, why're you still wearing a blanket? Is it because NEETS are too lazy to change their clothes? Hahahahahaha!
>>25066832
Why do wagecucks pretend to be anything other than what this fine gentleman tells us?
At least he admits it. That alone makes him better than 99% of wagecucks.
>>25066850
Theres nothing to it.
Just describe your average day and/or let wagecucks know how much they are missing.
Oh don't forget a pepe
>be most powerful sentient form of life on earth
>live in moms home eating top ramen watching anime
>>25066231
god damn those hours spent as a neet have completely refined your material
congrats
>>25066869
Because we don't need to get out of the comfy comfy bed
>>25066869
Good one, Orange. Though I guess this can't be considered "stand-up" comedy if NEETS are too lazy to do that, too!
>>25066901
>be most powerful sentient form of life on earth
>spend time talking shit in NEET vs. wageslave threads
>>25066898
I'll try my best, but I don't think I'd be as funny or smug as some of the elite neets.
>Sleep around 5 am
>No pressure to get up, enjoy that nice moment when you wake up and don't wanna get outta bed
>linger in bed for an hour or so watching whatever's on at noon.
>Eventually get up, get some comfy coffee or tea depending on what I feel like.
>Play vidya if feeling like it for the rest of the day
>shitpost and lurk here if not
>tfw literally no responsibilities
>tfw you have all the time in the world to do anything you feel likefeels pretty smug t.b.h.
So can we agree that these kinds of threads are /b/ tier?
>>25066913
2 big Macs please hold the ickle and pickle wagecuck
And I want fresh fries, I repeat. FRESH fries.
*Vroom vroom to pay*
OH WAGEKEK!! It's you!! How have you been?
Oh my you look awful..
I look great? Oh yes I know, I have been keep quite fit recently with all my spare time and all. I am writing a book at the moment, I'll stop by and give you a copy.
Don't work to hard now wagecuck haha.
*Vroom vroom*
>YOU DIDN'T PAY! Goldsteen is going to fire me this time for sure
>>25066901
>be most powerful sentient form of life on earth
>spend the better half of the day away from your family doing repetitive actions that ultimately mean nothing
I went outside today and saw three degenerates on the bus. Just seeing one degenerate is enough to change my current outlook on life; I don't know how the working man does it.
>>25066231
No wonder you have no friends NEET. Those are shit tier jokes.
>>25066969
>all
>the
>time
>in
>the
>world
WOOOOORLLLLLLLLLLDDDDDDD
>>25066981
> hold the ickle and pickle
That was the NEET comedian with his hilariously gut-busting routine "Wagecucks: To be or not to be (late)"
Coming up next, the delightful musical stylings of NEET musician.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YJ30w9R3XEY
>>25066981
How can wagecucks compete?
>>25067057
Very nice tunes. Music itself has a type of message to it, even lyricless ones such as this.
To me it says "my life is infinitely superior as a NEET, everyday is one of low stress and relaxation."
Great stuff my man.
>there are wagecucks existing right now
>tfw interning
>tfw nowagecucking
>JUST so I can wagecuck
I tried to be a NEET long as possible, boys. It was the best life, and I'll miss it forever, but someone is eventually going to hire me. Mommy won't support me forever-well, she will, but even I'm not evil enough to watch her become THAT disappointed in me.
>tfw just want food, internet connection, computer and some medical care if I get fucked up
>gotta give away over a third of my life to get this bullshit
I hate my everything, boys
>>25067057
This guy's got some real talent.
>>25067110
barely
they are semi-sentient creatures trudging through life
it's a unique experience to observe one in its natural habitat, known as the "workplace"
>writing out an honestly not half bad comedy routine JUST to troll people with gainful employment
Somebody do the voice.
I haven't been to the piano lounge lately, any new talents there?
>>25066832
this wagecuck here, thanks for the music >>25067057
It helps me relax after a long, terrible, depressing day. I really envy you neets, I really do. ;_; i wish i had a gf or had money
can neets pls stop teasing me? im really depressed and I dont like being made fun ofand yes i am serious
>>25067057
>>25067098
Ooh, hey, I can sing too!
La la lalala la! LA LALALALA LA! HEY!
Hahahahaha!
>>25067163
NEETs are men of the people. We strive to amaze and entertain. We are philosophers carrying the torch of creativity and wisdom.
How do you do?
The holidays are always a special time of year, buying presents, shitty Christmas music, all that good stuff. But do you know one group who this time of year isn't so special? I think we're all on the same page here, yep the wagecucks. I was legitimately surprised when I found out that food joints stay open on Christmas day, even Christmas morning that is some Scrooge shit right there. When we were kids we'd get two weeks off for the holidays because they're national holidays but the wagies owner, er boss had found a way to get more productivity from them and now wagies have to sweat just to get a few hours because Schlomosheklestein has a tight vice on their balls and Passover is already over! The only togetherness the wagecuck experiences on Christmas is being together in a back kitchen with other sweaty Mexicans and the manager's bullshit "Happy holidays now wash those dishes!"
>>25067163
This. It would be pretty fucking funny to hear with audience clapping noises and a laugh track added in.
>>25067217
Hey, NEETs are your friends. Sure, we like to tease you and joke around, but we really do care about your overall well-being.
Few people in this world are as caring and compassionate as the NEET.
>>25067057
I swear to god this music is from a hentai visual novel I've played.
It's killing me I don't recall which one.
Unicuck here, enjoying the fuck out of my temporary NEET-life during winter break and trying to blow off some steam before next semester starts. Could we get some unicuck jokes?
>>25067254
>How do you do?
I'm a military welfare queen. It's really annoying the last week because I've actually had work keeping me until close of business. Normally I get out a few hours early.
As soon as I get debt free I'm gonna get out and go back to being NEET.
>tfw self employed
>>25067494
Here's a nice schoolcuck routine to hold you over
Schoolcucks are a particular breed of cucked. They'll do anything they can just to get an 'A' so their parents don't bitch at them and their egos don't shrink down to the size of a fucking crumb. It's all about that nice fucking letter 'A.'
'A' fucking headache because of all the eye strain from reading through books is more like it. Hell, nothing a couple advil can't solve. Just pop two, wait for the relief and it's back to studying hard so you won't get bitched at by anyone!
Great motivator right? I was around enough of these people in high school before I dropped the fuck out. Most of you remember the honors students...you know, the ones who thought that taking all of their classes at the honors level would make them hot shit once they entered the real world. Riiiiight...typical future interview for 'em goes something like this:
"So, what makes you fitting for the job?"
"I took a lot of honors classes in high school!"
Meanwhile the employer looks down and writes bullshit in his notebook because he just hired a junkie burnout two days ago, buuuut maybe the honors kid'll help pick up the slack. Work ethic, right?
You know, come to think of it, I remember the last exchange I had with an honors student. Smart motherfucker, too. Last thing I said to him was "someone spilled some shit in the aisle next to this one, you might want to go mop it up!"
>>25066981
>work in fast food place on graveyard shift
>someone doesn't pay
>just error correct and go back to my ciggerette
i work on the most not giving a shit shift, and i still feel stressed fairly often. i would hate to work at a place where i was held to account for my retardedness. actually i already hate where i work. i hate everything about who i am and what Ive accomplished in my life.
>>25067537
Here's to a speedy transition from militarycuck to NEET.
Safe travels, friend.
>>25067574
Hahahaha, oh man! You're telling me there's people who actually TRIED in High School?
What can you expect out of a future wagecuck, I guess.
>>25067574
classic
schoolcucks have nothing on full-blown wagecucks
>>25067574
>You know, come to think of it, I remember the last exchange I had with an honors student. Smart motherfucker, too. Last thing I said to him was "someone spilled some shit in the aisle next to this one, you might want to go mop it up!"
Beautiful. Thanks senpai
>>25067632
T-thanks NEETbro.
I-it's not like I keep the country safe for you or anything, I just felt like it!
>>25066981
>mommy mommy! No pickles! Pickles are icky for my tum tum!
please continue these Anon
>>25067712
>I-it's not like I keep the country safe for you or anything,
Military cucks ACTUALLY believe this.
>>25067747
Militarycuck routine when?
>>25067574
>>25067640
>>25067681
Sounds like you guys must have gotten a BACHELOR's degree! Hahahaha!
Too long winded m8
But I bet you're happy you can say wagecuck again instead of wagekek
Working a job does indeed kinda suck, sometimes, depending on what it is. But I've accomplished and experienced more than any NEET ever will. I'm happier and more fulfilled. Wew, lad.
>>25067712
You're a glorified police officer.
I'm not saying police officers aren't protectors, but what good are they to me if they're a thousand miles away, y'know?
In any case, stay safe, militarybro.
>>25066654
>w-wow can't wait to get up early to contribute to society!
>e-e-early bird c-catches the worm, r-right?
>Sorry Mr. Goldstien, I won't do it again! Just cut my hours I'll be okay
>>25067610
last week my mum spent my entire pay at the casino.
had to withdraw money from my moving out fund.
i really should just end it all. at a point its my fault for being too optimistic and going on like this.
>>25067775
Is it even worth it? Even normal wagecucks make fun of the military.
Here's my day:
>wake up at 0330
>shower and shave as fast as I can
>walk across base to work
>have to empty my pockets for security every day
>climb stairs (no elevators)
>cram some slop into my mouth so I don't collapse from hunger in a few hours
>rush to quarters
>no point, there's nothing to put out anyway
>spend the next hour doing basic janitorial work
>once that's done do maintenance
>have to 'read a step do a step' off a card because the military doesn't trust us to know how to do anything
>wearing ridiculous amounts of safety gear so we don't injure ourselves
>do this until lunch
>rush to get in a 90 minute line for lunch with everyone else
>finally get some slop
>cram it down before lunch is over
>oops, it's training day, gotta go to training
>wait for instructor to show up for 30 minutes
>get the same boring training as last month
>get back to workshop
>another half hour of cleaning
>finally get to go home
>on the way out get scolded by an NCO for something inane like hands in pockets or 5 o'clock shadow
>have maybe two hours to shitpost with my NEET friends until I have to get to bed
>>25067574
>be in uni
>scholarship requires certain grade point average so I won't get debts
>working part time on top of that
>not getting enough sleep
>feel like shit
>driving home one night
>Drunk normies on the road swerving because they are trying to party in the car
>Side swipe my car
>I go off the road, throguh the railing, and roll down the small cliff
>Live but am crippled
>Sue the normies for all their money
>Also qualify for disability
>One of the normies tries to commit suicide, fails because he went across instead of up the road
>They will work for the rest of their lives to pay me back
>I get to live the life of a NEET now
>Get to enjoy this special comedy show
Life is good.Miss being able to walk though
>>25067926
America wouldn't need a massive military if it didn't fuck up the lives of people in the middle east so much. You shat on your own plate, m8. Eat it up.
>>25067840
Well we do keep those nasty terrorists occupied on the shitty half of the planet so they can't come to the nice part, generally.
Don't forget to vote for Trump!
>tfw fucking wagecuck
>tfw working 7 days in a row, all 5 AM starts for pathetic 4 hour shifts
>tfw I live 30 min drive away so I have to get up at 4 AM
>tfw go to bed at 11:30 cause my sleep schedule is fucked
>tfw they never extend my hours cause they hired too many seasonal people and don't have the "budget" for extra hours despite two of the full timers getting overtime regularly
>tfw I'm getting fucked and cucked by my employer
JUST FUCK MY SHIT UP FAMILY
>>25067993
Never forget Muslims started the fight.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/First_Barbary_War
I like my job, but I only make 55k/year.
How do I get neet money? How much do you get monthly?
>>25067993
Sand niggers exist to be exploited IMO. My problem is the USA is so half-assed with its imperialism.
Like, why invade Camelfuckistan and then spend all of that time and all of those resources trying to play nice with the locals? Slaughter them and take their women. Who's gonna fucking stop them?
>>25066231
*Clap Clap* Clap* HAHAHAHA Keep em coming pepe!
>>25068077
>why invade Camelfuckistan
Because of Israel. America is a puppet of Israel.
>>25067973
I wish I was able to sue
How much did you get?
My story
>Squatting in gym because all the time in the world
>Kid over head pressing by next to me knocks my bar
>Weight shifts to spine
>L5 S1 herniated disk
>Can barely walk due to pain
>Stuck in wheelchair or crunches
>>25066231
HAHAHA Looks like someone's on a roll today!
Hey, hey NEETS! Hey! Guess what?
So are you still a cripple?
>>25068146
Orange you glad I didn't say wagecuck
>>25066463
>30 minute lunch
>big boss come up and talks to you for 45 minutes 15 minutes into your lunch
>knows both of you have time to kill
>the only guy bigger than him is 7000 miles away
>hour lunch break with 30 minutes of it paid
Feels good man
Eh I got the chance to NEET it up, but I like toys too much for now. How do you neets live without consumerism?
>>25067574
>honors classes
>anything
You might as well just take regular classes at that point. IB 4 lyfe desu
>tfw my job service provider has in the process of setting up Work Health and Safety training for me and I'll be starting work as soon as that's done.
>tfw I can't get out of it without losing Centrelink.
It'll only be around 15-20 hours a fortnight and I'll still get a decent chunk of Centrelink on top of what I'll be earning but I still feel sad I can never be an elite NEET and my NEET days are coming to an end.
It's been an honor and a privilege NEETing it up with you all. If you ever see a sad manlet landscaping the yards of public housing, make your next tendy extra crispy in his memory.
>>25068182
Nope, guess again! Here's a hint: It eats up everything you have, including your money!
>>25068243
AAAAA FEEEEEEEEMMMMALLLLLLLLEEEE
REEEEEEEEE
>>25068133
It's cause they were drunk as fuck
>Crunches
Ahead of me, I'm stuck in the chair forever. On the one hand wheeling myself around has given me really good upper body strength. Can't really do leg day though. I'm on the way to Togurro mode.The shrink says my jokes are a coping mechanism
>>25066832
Are you from Maryland?
>>25067574
Damn that has to be the best thing I read all week
>>25068275
Yeah, and she's a real snake!
>>25068301
>The shrink says my jokes are a coping mechanism
So does mine.
>>25067574
Ooo, ooo!!!
Do one about college students taking Adderall because they're so obsessed with their grades that they're willing to take drugs and stay awake far longer than they should, even if it ends up hurting their physical and mental health.
Anything for that GPA!
>>25068301
Your story made me sad. I want to hug you.
>>25068275
>>25068358
Uhh, I don't think you heard me! I said, she's A REAL SNAKE!
>>25068301
>toguro
Well at least you have excellent taste in anime.
>>25068604
>>25068275
*CHOMP!*
>>25068512
Someday I hope my hugs will be able to crush people's bones.
>>25068634Kuwabara is best grill
>>25068683
AHH! Oh no!
Poor NEET! I guess things didn't WORK out for him after all! Hahaha.. Ouch.
>>25066463
STOP IIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!
AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Wagecuck here, with a twist:
>be schoolcuck all my life, always working hard to get good grades
>grind extra hard in college to be the best, do lots of extracurricuck activites for my resume
>need to put a smile on and a nice button shirt and tie to fool normie wagecucks that I am working on their side
>get into med school, which is about as wagecuck as it gets, pay THEM to work extra hard all day every day, I literally get those schoolcuck headaches from reading books all day
BUT
IT WILL ALL BE WORTH IT
Because one day I will become a surgeon,
and when you wagecucks, from your nice relaxing life of splendor have a pain in your gallbladder...
you will need me, the wagecuckest of them all, to remove that gallbladder to take your pain away.
And I will be glad to do it (plus tip) because I love the NEETs with all my heart and soul.
WAGEKEKS4NEET 2016.
WE LIVE TO SERVE
I know these wagecuck threads are just a fresh meme to some of you, but they're actually the underpinnings of the next social crash.
Wagecucks are mad and underpaid. They feel like shit, and they don't know what to do about it. So when they have a group of people to blame, they take it the first chance they can. In this case, it's immigrants/refugees. It's going to happen soon. There's going to be a massive racist movement in the United States and Europe (XD good!).
No, not good. Because the wagecucks will immediately get back into the same patterns. They'll work 50 hours and week and pretend they like it. And when automation and robots come make them redundant, they won't do anything to fix the broken distribution of wealth. They'll just blame immigrants again.
Wagecucks: always fighting for the crumbs rather than overthrowing the 1% eating all the cake.
NEETs are basically white immigrants/refugees. They're an easy target but not really the big problem.
my day yesterday:
>wake at noon
>laze around in bed for an hour, then get up, make the bed, get some water in me
>shower, shit, shave, get dressed
>make a simple breakfast with ham slices, toasted bread, over easy eggs, and half a pineapple
>drive to work without much traffic since it's early afternoon
>meeting at 3:30pm
>after meeting topic discussion at 4pm
>do checks on last duty shift and swap out new target packages for the day
>get my radio, authorize key, and head to the cafeteria for coffee, donuts and fruit (free since it's cheap)
>spend the next 2 hours reading/replying to email and doing software stuff
>take an hour lunch at a local greek place with some coworkers (meze plate is great for $8 and comes with a fountain drink)
>drive back to site, check in, et c
>spend 4 hours doing maintenance work and rebuilds on aging equipment, checking in new equipment, and implementing swap outs
>another lunch for an hour just snacking on cafeteria food (chicken noodle and some sides)
>2 more hours doing software stuff
>1 hour to write reports, hit up the in-office gym, and dick around until production is over for the tonight
>drive home with no traffic at 2am
>dick around for a couple hours, go to sleep and repeat for 3 more days
>enjoy a 3 day weekend, maybe work from home a little, then go back to work again. new projects, new designs, et c.
easy days playing with expensive things on someone else's dime and getting paid to do it on top of all that. salaried work, so i'm paid for expertise, not time. if it only takes me 2 hours to finish my tasks for a day, then i'm done and go home.
>>25067864
Hahahahahah I know people like that. 10/10 anon
>>25067926
>Read a step do a step
This is what wagecucks take pride in
>>25066553
>>25066644
>>25067110
>>25067125
>happiness
>confidence
>enjoyment
NEETs confirmed normies. Normies are not welcome here you are not welcome here this place is not for you you are not robots you are not welcome here nobody wants you here normalcuck
>>25067973
I'd give up being able to walk if I could get disability and normie bloodmoney.
Good job, Sayaka-chan. You wanna be my cripple gf?
>>25066735
>What else do you have, vacation days?
>NEETs call that 'everyday.'
Fucking savage
>>25069308
Wagecuck psyop detected.
Nice try.
>>25069223
shit after you shower? your disgusting. die.
>>25069335
come again, normie? I don't speak facebook or reddit, normalcuck
>>25068805
OK OK I'll give you some time to relax. After that it's tick tock
>>25069352
it's not in order, generally, and i wash my hands anyway with biocidal hand soap. you don't?
>>25069370
>relaxing
>ever
get out normie
>>25069315
Normies may have stolen my legs but I'm not about to let someone take my virginity. Five more years and I get magic powers.
bait thread as usual
but I enjoy working at the bakery
free bakery foods for me to take home and eat
>>25069370
*sniff* i don't want to go to bed
yeah but when was the last time you wanted something but couldn't afford it?
as a 'wage cuck' I can buy anything I want,
can you say the same...? ;)
>>25069439
don't listen to the normie memes with their Facebook frog desu, they're all objectively and irrefutably not robots and not welcome here
>>25069477
Yes... keep consuming goy.... I mean guy
You need that big house and new car! So what if it's five years of your salary? I very reasonable interest rates to finance your purchases goyim...
>>25069477
HAHAHA
>implying you can actually buy shit without placing yourself under crushing debt as a wagie
Also, you probably buy too much bullshit anyway, enjoy your worthless baubles and trinkets.
>>25069520
so you don't purchase anything, ever?
This doesn't add up guys.
>Pepe is a normie meme
>the only people who still post Pepe are normies
>OP is a normie
>normies have jobs
>OP is actually a wagecuck
You almost got away with it you sneaky Hebrew
>>25069554
I have all my needs met and I get all of my media, games and entertainment for free
No reason to consume wastefully
>>25069536
>Sour grapes
although what sort of moron buys beyond his means it probably someone that either doesn't understand how money works or is desperate to present an image to others.
Reminds me of NEETs really, living a life dependent on the generosity of others while producing nothing worthwhile themselves, and having no assets, no relationships, and no meaningful outcomes to be remembered by.
>>25069581
So why do you assume that someone who has employment is also someone that consumes needlessly. The two aren't related.
>>25066231
>*brief awkward forced laughter and clapping*
>"FREE BIRD!!!"
>"You suuuuck!"
>>25069554
>using the internal combustion jew
>not mending your clothing and snatching what you need from consignment shop charity drops
>spending lots of money on red meat that gives you cancer
>spending money on shit you can get for free on the internet
Really what the fuck are you actually buying that's "enriching" your life so much?
Haha I will be laughing at you neets once mommy kicks you out and I have my own apartment all the vidya money can afford and a smoking hot gf.
>"anon s-spare a coin for a poor frog
>"Ewww anon who is this loser?"
>"Ignore him and come back to my place for some hot sex"
>"sure thing anon!"
I can already taste your salty tears
>>25069630
The wagecucks says "I can buy anything I want", not realizing his freedom and time are more valuable than any trinket
>>25069614
This.
Goodnight neets, going to sleep next to my fiance now, with hundreds of hard earned credits safely in my account to spend on what I choose. Won't check this thread again,goodnight.
>>25069682
Incredibly delusional wage cuck. My parents are dead, the nanny state takes care of me now (thank you 100% disability from the VA).
>>25069680
gb2reddit
>>25069682
>gf
At least put some realism in there.
>>25069682
>this level of delusion
Wagecucks confirmed for living in la-la land.
>>25069682
>"Ignore him and come back to my place for some hot sex"
You expect anyone to believe this shitty bait
Fuck off to reddit bud
>>25069724
>>25069737
>>25069867
>>25069937
>all these hotheaded neets
Keep deluding yourselves into believing your fantasy lasts forever
>>25069973
it does you fucking retard mummys precious little sugarplum is never leaving home
>>25069457
But anon, how will you wake up tomorrow for you shift? You don't get money for doing nothing. Well you don't, we do hahahaha
>>25069986
>This retarded neet will probably live with his mum for the rest of her and then for a few weeks
>>25069995
NO! how am i supposed to go to sleep peacefully knowing that the next thing i will here is *BEEP* *BEEP* *BEEP*
BEEEEEEEEEEEP*
please tell me there is a way out!
WAKE
I love these threads almost as much as I love "My mom is throwing me out tomorrow, what do?" threads. Tick Tock NEETS.
Sorry OP you got way too deep at the end there, it was no longer comedy.
>>25069685
and you post frogs on a meme board about losers that can't get their dick sucked. i don't think you're going to win any awards for anything either.
You peaked my interest, now you have my attention.
All few questions:
>How do you have enough money to eat?
>Pay rent?
>Pay bills?
>Participate in some social activities with friends?
>Gas?
>Where do you live? (Type of home and location)
>How to you afford tangible goods? (Computer, cloths, new shoes, phone, basic/bare minimum necessities)
Just legitimately curiosity...
My guess, you guys collect welfare and foodstamps. Or part time jobs?
>>25069581
>thinking life is just media consumption
fucking normies
>>25069685
>freedom
being cucked by your internet addiction and digital media addiction are not freedom, guy
>>25070101
Money from lawsuit and disability payment. Live in ground floor apartment. I don't buy gas because I rarely drive my car. It's weird not having to push the pedals, also I am slightly afraid to be inside cars since the accident.
>>25070166
>>25070182
Life is just biological memes.
>>25070101
>peaked my interest
>peaked
>>25070262
Wageslaves are barely literate
I bet they don't even read Kant and Rousseau
nice one NEETs, already copy pasting jokes from a few nights ago i see.
anyway, im on my winter break from school now and being a NEET is shit. i feel tired all the time, the sun is always setting because of my sleep schedule, and i sure as hell am not happy. I know who's getting cucked here. its not me.
>>25066999
fuck. this is a stark fact of modernity.
>tfw we could all be doing something meaningful with our lives
>>25070360
>could be
That's the key term. I'm afraid human nature screws us over in that regard.
>>25070101
>>Participate in some social activities with friends?
>friends
Part-time wagie here.
I go to college full time ("returning" student in my mid 20s) and work 3 days a week (at a job that I really don't mind).
In fact, I like NEETs. I'm all for giving you guys benefits. I don't mind a fraction of my taxes going towards paying for you guys to keep your WoW accounts. I would much rather the government give my taxes to NEETs than to fucking Israel or to paying legislators to make more laws to tell us what to do.
>>25070261
>biological memes
>someone actually used this as an excuse for being cucked by media consumption
>>25069724
>gb2reddit
That was a reference to a Bill Hicks standup called "I'm Sorry Folks" where he lashed out at a retarded audience who didn't understand dark, cynical humor and just wanted to hear sex jokes.
Not reddit at all.
>>25070482
>In fact, I like NEETs. I'm all for giving you guys benefits.
Thanks man!
You feelin the Bern?
>>25070529
The way you make references is terrible and forced, fuck off.
>>25066231
haha i love these roleplay threads
>wage cuck
>easy job
>sit at comfy desk at all day
>get payed big bucks
>can buy what I want when I want
>plenty of energy because I work out after sitting at work all day able to come home refreshed from the gym and work on my hobbies that I can afford to pay for
>>25066231
>>25067574
this is my favorite show
thank you neetfriend
>>25067182
>>25070600
hows this one guyz?
>>25070539
You're welcome... but nah, fuck that. I could see Sanders telling legitimately disabled whites to suck it up and go to work, then giving blacks all the free shit they want. I don't trust him at all. I could see Sanders calling for hate speech laws and turning us into the UK.
I'd vote for Trump over any of the other candidates for different reasons... but I don't really like any of the options. I have more of a European conservative outlook.
Government spending and welfare spending are perfectly fine, as long as it is on our people, and not on illegal immigrants, immigrants who hate our country/culture and violent minority groups who are given everything for free yet still hate the majority and blame them for shit that people completely unrelated to them did before they were even born. How can you be responsible for something that happened before you were born that you had no say in? That is just stupid, illogical thinking.
>>25069153
>mfw shitskin NEET
literally the most Degenerate of Degenerates!
>>25070783
i was gonna post that but I forgot i didn't save it
thanks anon! life is terrible!
>>25067926
Military cuck here as well. Fortunately I'm in MOS school right now so not so bad...here's my routine
>wake up at 0430
>formation for PT at 0500
>after PT at 0600 go back to room
>go to chow at 0645 but take sweet ass time
>Do meaningless janitor tasks for about half an hour
>get rest of morning to fap and watch porn
>go to chow at 1130
>Come back and fap again or watch movies or play vidya
>Have the rest of day to myself to nap or watch porn
It's going to suck when I actually have to go to class
>>25066839
>No time to poop and eat this morning, i must pick one or the other
Fuck I laughed.
what do NEETs like yourself think of the righteous self employed?
>>25067712
>>25067840
>>25067996
>>25068048
>>25068077
>unironically being this cucked by General Shekelstein and your C.I.A. overlords
Underage v& here's the deal:
These MilitaryCucks are shilling
I'm going to be one of the few people on this thread to tell it to you straight.
Don't mind these ContractPlebs.
These succubi are literal slaves for Raytheon, Blackwater, Northrop Grumman and Halliburton shekels.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6VMaW9GfQKM
These threads
My sides
as a "wagecuck" >< i approve of these threads lol XD
>>25066869
This is the most normie-tier, lower management, 40 year old, 9-5 Facebook baby boomer shit I've ever seen. Annoying fucking Orange? Why don't you post a fucking minion before shitposting with chainmail.
YOU'VE BEEN VISITED BY THE WEATHERED WAGEKEK.
Repost in 5 seconds saying "Thanks Cucky" or your NEETbux will stop coming in.
Does anyone else see pepe wrapped up in his comfort and just die of laughter.
by far best meme
>>25071113
Thanks Cucky
Man, this meme just gets fresher and fresher. I honestly feel honored to post itt
>>25071345
And I feel honored to have you in my audience.
I've got a bit of a buzz going, maybe I'll post some new shit to keep the NEET comedy club a movin'.
What to joke about...what to joke about.
H-Hi fellow NEETs. I sure love sleeping in past 6 AM and enjoying my life. This standup is great!
Unfortunately I can't stay for long. I n-need to get in bed soon because I uh, I have to go on a long run tomorrow.
>get job 6 years ago
>first night
>have to kneel down and pick up strings
>do this dozens of times
>stand up after picking up a handful
>shooting pain through my knee
>to this day my knee will give me trouble if I put too much weight on it
After that I pledged to never again cuck for wages
It wasn't meant to be
joke's on you, chucklefuck
I'm quitting my job tomorrow!
>>25071689
Welcome to the good life then.
>>25067555
Nice trips, masterace man
Soon to be former target employee and moving on to home depot, NEETS listen to me, NEVER work at target or walmart. i've worked at both and they are twice as hell. Just 2 more days til i quit Target. I just hope Home Depot will be nice. I'm not gonna let my job consume my spirit like it had tried to multiple times.
Hey NEETS wagecuck here, I just wanted to say thank you for making my day posting this, it's all true and I love the new material
testing cuck nigger desu senpai faggot jew
>>25072290
shaking my baka senpai ily
>>25069439
Bread is what, $0.02 cents a loaf? Is it really worth slaving over when you can get the exact same bread made at home? Instead of wasting your life you can make a loaf or do then do something productive with your time. I guess that's kind of scary to think of doing something without being told. What's your favorite bread? I enjoy baking too. I have a kind of sour pizza dough I bake. No knead, it sits for 3 days and is then cooked. It's amazing. I also make donuts fried in real lard. I'll never be able to enjoy the ghetto fake donuts fried in oil again.
>'SHUT UP I'M CALLING THE MANAGER ON YOU'
this line fucking slays me every time I read it. I don't know how anons come up with shit.
imagine that acted out by Michael Douglas in falling down. the ultimate wagecuck!!
>>25069477
Everything but food and drink is free. What could you buy that a neet can't? Once a month I buy two handles of bourbon. I go to Kroger twice a week and shop the manager's specials for meat then get fresh produce to go with it. I enjoyed spicy pulled beef sandwiches for dinner earlier tonight. Since in not a wagekek I had time to sear, make a good vegetable stock,and bake some rolls. The trick is painting the tops with egg whites before and midway through baking. They come out so smooth, shiny, and perfectly browned.
Other than that I really can't think of anything. I mean maybe tools, but a neet only buys those once from Craigslist as his projects require. It's not expensive, and besides that, wagekeks have no time or energy to do anything fun or productive.
>>25069630
Why work then? Is it just so you don't have to take responsibility for your life? How can someone be happy with never doing anything productive or of value? Are Mr Shekelsteins headpats and good boys really worth selling your dignity for?
>>25069682
If mommy tried to kick me out of my house I'd call the police. The problem is easily solved. I'll be fucking your girl while you're at work. I'll try not to tire her out too much. I'm sure you're starting to get sick of hearing "not tonight babe, I still have a headache from cumming my brains out on anons glorious neet cock earlier".
>Work for 2 hours a day 5 days a week
>500$ every 15 days for Grad school
Feels nice. Don't have to work the Holidays either
>>25072860
>getting paid to go to school
Where the fuck do you go?
>>25072890
I'm a Grad Assistant at my university.
>>25070064
I paid a cam whore to post a recording of her saying "good morning anon, it's time to wake up. I love you, have a good day at work". I set it as my alarm tone. I thought it would make me sadder but I do like it. I also fall asleep to 10 hours epic rain and thunder playing over a recording I found of a girl sleeping and breathing.
Those asmr girls are the biggest whores. They'll do shit the chat(mast)urbate would never do in a heartbeat and usually for just $5 or $10.
wait i can say cuck now?
>>25070101
>how do you have enough money to eat?
Food stamps and babysitting wagies on suicide watch part time nights
>Pay rent?
I cut the grass and cook, mommy thinks this is more than enough. Really she just enjoys my company, but I can't let her do those things. It's too dangerous.
>Pay bills?
Mommy's pension covers power, Internet, property tax, and cellular. What other bills are there?
>Participate in some social activities with friends?
I shitpost here. No real friends but there's always 1 or two races a month in a city nearby and I've gotten to know the regulars. 10k is my favorite but I do 5ks too and even did a half marathon once. I get bored after about 90 to 120 minutes though, so 10k is perfect.
>Gas?
It's cheap, $1.60 something a gallon last I filled up.
>Where do you live? (Type of home and location)
3br/2ba little brick house on 6 acres innawoods
>How to you afford tangible goods? (Computer, cloths, new shoes, phone, basic/bare minimum necessities)
I just buy them. Computers last a long time when you only use 4chan and emulators for ps1 and down. Clothes last until they're worn out, shoes as well. Toilet paper I get scotch which costs a little more but lasts 4x as long roll for roll, and really isn't that much more if you buy the giant packages.
It's mommiemommies pension,ebt, and about 24 hrs a week of shitposting while some emo sleeps all night.
>>25073119
Sounds very comfy. NEET life is truly the patrician life.
>>25070182
It speaks volumes about your character when the only thing you can imagine doing with your time besides wagekek is be addicted to digital media. Get a life, faggot.
>>25066231
best wagecuck copypasta meme ive seen
>tfw part-time job
>5-10 at night
>mindless task actually helps break up the monotony of my day and give me something to focus on
>actually enjoying myself and now have a nice savings account toward the future
Life is good boys.
>>25068146
>>25068182
>>25068243
>>25068275
>>25068358
>>25068604
>>25068683
>>25068730
These NEET threads are getting better day after day.
Wakey wakey
If you don't squeeze in that shower that cuts your sleep short, your co-workers will talk behind your back!
And skipping work is not an option because you need all the jew points you can get so you can buy what the tv told you to buy!
Alright, NEETcomedian, I'm taking back the mic. You seem to forget I own this place, just like I own you.
Tell me NEET, how does it feel to look at the money in your bank account, fearing the end of it every day? Having to look at all those things you want, even if you say you don't, to look at games you can't afford, to look at computers you can't buy, to look at that dakimakura of your waifu, who will never love you? How proud are you to know that the money you get is handed down to you by your mother, or by the sole virtue of the government? You NEETs should suck the cock of every leftist politician you meet, since they're the only ones keeping the system alive. That's what you are, NEETs. Whores for handouts.
But tick tock NEETs.
The end is coming for you. They're letting in so many migrants that soon it will be the end for you. No more money for NEETbux.
Hell, even the people are getting fed up with giving people money for meme disorders even they know aren't real. Autism? Hah.
No NEET, I know you will tell me you don't care. But what when the money ends? You have no marketable skill. Fapping to anime does not get you hired. You have nothing to show for yourself.
Oooh, so you wrote a sonata and read philosophy? Neet neet neet. Do you even know what we do with people who are accomplished musicians? With people who write philosophy books? Do you truly think that this is worth anything?
And that's implying you don't lie, NEET. That's implying you aren't here because you feel crushed by loneliness and only connect with utter rejects and virgins. Tell me, how does it feel to fall asleep holding your own hands because you are so lonely?
You claim to cuck our wives, but NEET, we know you don't, and that you desire the women we can have. All you get are fat, desperate femanons, and we don't want those. Do you think they wouldn't jump at the snap of a finger for a rich wagecuk? Keep dreaming NEET.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA BLOWN
THE
FUCK
OUT
FUCK YOU WAGEKEKS FUUUUUUCK YOOOOOU HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAH
>>25066231
WHEN WILL SOMEONE RECORD THESE AND ADD A LAUGH TRACK?
>>25075623
http://youtu.be/K8E_zMLCRNg
>>25075623
>games you can't afford
games are for children, and if I wanted them I could pirate them
>computers you can't buy
when you're not going crazy over the latest triple A garbage, you discover that computers actually last a very long time
>dakimakura
Not having a job means that my emotional health is much better than that of my wagie peers, so I do not require such garbage. Nice try, pillow merchant.
>money you get is handed down to you by your mother, or by sole virtue of the government
My mother is dead, but yes, I do get 100% disability from the VA since I did my time in the military unlike your cowardly ass.
>Whores for handouts
Not everyone is born with a silver spoon in their mouth, Harvey Goldensteen.
>>25069335
cler bear?
>>25075737
>emotional health is much better
>get 100% disability since I did my time in the military
Somehow I doubt the first part of your proposition based on the second.
>>25075623
This is what they call a 'bad set' in the comedy business.
>>25066231
Funniest wagecuck thread of the year right here.
>>25075844
I don't need to make any more money than I do, I just wanted to point the NEET to his rightful place.
On his knees.
Begging.
For my money.
>>25075869
How does a person spend over 8 hours every day slaving on thier own knees for the boss's scraps, and then turn and see the NEET in his own position? I think you've gone mad from sleep deprivation, wagie.
>>25067182
>"insure" is used incorrectly instead of "ensure" each time it comes up in this image
>>25075923
I'm my own boss NEET.
Now open wide as I spill my money on your face.
It's much nicer to humiliate you directly than through the government. Maybe I should make this a team building activity. Where the wagecucks under me can humiliate the NEETs.
Nothing better to feel good about yourself than to humiliate other people. Too bad you're not above anyone NEET, despite these pathetic attempts of a thread.
why do you have to be so mean neetfrogs
i dont even have a wife to decline sex
highlight of the year is the 1,5weeks off for holidays and do like neets
whatever
>>25075623
MY man, all you had to do was link this thread:
>>25075948
Let them implicate themselves.
I'm basically NEET since I'm a grad student who doesn't have to pay tuition because I'm teaching Composition next spring so hey
>>25076000
trips of truth trips of truth
wagecuck all the way
>>25066231
Literally Autism the post
There are people on r9k that unironically believe that being unemployed, living with their parents and leeching off of society makes them superior to people who are independent and who support themselves.
>>25069973
careful now, wouldn't want Mr. Goldstein to see that loli if you want to keep your job.
>>25076147
>slaving away every day for the right to stay alive
>independent
oh i am laffing
>>25076348
Tell me NEET, when was the last time something you had was given in exchange for a skill, capacity, or thing you did? You are on the far left, right, like those communists, SJW and feminists thinking of "universal income"?
You do nothing of value.
You are nothing of value.
took the day off to star wars at 645 so hahaha jokes on you neet fag
>>25076396
>being an assistant secretary to a social media outreach manager is valuable work
keep telling yourself you aren't completely expendable interchangeable trash, wagecuck.
>>25076430
Talking about interchangeability coming from a NEET, the irony must burn like the gastric acid you get from too many subways and ramen, no?
>>25076430
>talks about being disposable
>provides literally no contribution to society and actually is a drain on it
top kek
>>25066231
Sure looks fun to be a neet! >>25075948
Bump. These threads are comedy gold.
>>25066231
Thisand the zone have entered is called the Smug Zone.
>>25076917
Thisis a correction to the post above: I mean the zone *I* have entered is called the Smug Zone.
>>25076454
>>25076490
The NEET has a point.
A wage-slave death amounts to a minute of silence from his coworkers during lunch break, and being a topic of chitchat (replacing "How's the weather" with - did you that ......... died?") among the circle of people who knew him for 10 days. Oh, and that new job advertisement for that one open slot of employment in a place he previously worked.
Thanks for contributing to society! We hope you raised at least one offspring/thugspawn to replace either you or someone else in the near future!
Long live society!
>>25073167
interesting, but it is in fact neets that have been cucked by media addiction, not wagenobles
>>25066463
>We have alll the tiiimme in the woooooooorld
literally the moment mummy dies you are dead
>>25066231
How do neets feel about part-time cucks? I clean office buildings a few hours a night, still have a lot of free time, only works out to 20 hours a week. Just a bit above $700 a month. Anyone with neetbux would be making about the same money, likely even less, and I actually do a lot of the things you guys talk about (reading, practicing guitar, exercising).
I had a full time cuck, once, and I wanted to kill myself. But when I go full NEET, I'm so bored and broke that I want to kill myself.
>>25077009
I never said working is fun or satisfying, it isn't it's fucking terrible but having been a neet in the past for a while I can tell you that it's much better to be working and actually earn your own money instead of leeching off of your parents. Also being a neet robot is soul crushing, during the months I spent as a neet I never had any sense of accomplishment or purpose, now I have a job and even though I hate it for the most part it's actually kind of nice to be able to buy stuff with money that you know you earned and worked hard for instead of begging mom and dad for.
>>25077178
Whoha, nice blogging.
Look, pal, if that works out for you - cool.
Not all slaves are (or have to be) upset about being slaves, so it's perfectly fine.
>>25067217
I'm not going to be as condescending as as some these neetfucks but as a fellow wagecuck, all I can say is find something that makes you happy. You might not have as much time as neets to devote yourself to it but it makes you appreciate what little time you spend on it.
For me it was art, I know my work won't make me rich but it makes me happy, and that's even better.
Find something to be happy about because It won't find you, anon.
>>25077287
>Not all slaves are (or have to be) upset about being slaves, so it's perfectly fine.
That's the problem though, it's not fine it's pathetic and neets are a drain on taxpayer's finances and a burden to society.
>>25077287
>Whoha, nice blogging.
Is that supposed to be a comeback or rebuttal? I'm just sharing my experience here m8
>tfw unifag and get to be neet for a month and half
Feels good senpai
>>25075623
BOOOOO
GET OFF THE STAGE LOSER
>>25066735
Your "vacation" is you jerking off 8 hours a day.
my vacation was spent in Los Vegas snorting coke off a hookers cell phone lel
>>25070783
this is the only true infographic ITT. 3 year NEET here
>>25075623
HOW
DARE
YOU
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>25079924
And then you woke up.
I have extravagant dreams too wagie.
>work from home
>only 6 hours each day
>3/4 of that time is fapping or watching movies while doing work slowly
>almost always finish early because workload is so small and kept up to date
>make $80,000 annual
NEETkeks will never EVER have life this good
>tfw I was homeschooled
>will never be a gradecuck
Nothing gallant or refined about being a NEET.
I was one for eight months.
I lose all my motivation, my drive. I didn't leave the house, or even my room; I spend most of the time sleeping or going on imageboards, and occasionally looking for jobs. I just wanted out.
I work now, and while I do hate my job (mostly because of its dead-end nature), I'd prefer to be earning money - which I can save to use for something I truly want, like, say, a home - than stuck in my parent's home.
>>25082376
What is it you do sempai?
