But mostly Amber and Maple.
>>27531136
finally finished that stupid fucking polandball edit that shouldnt have taken more than a day.
>>27531721
>>27531188
Poor maple. Always trying
I love it man
>>27531867
unf
moar?
>>27531903
theres no more. it was just those 2 images inspired by ottoways green.
>>27531188
I miss Maria.
>>27531146
>Sweden
>Not getting STRIPED
>>27532869
Dirty pedophile located,
>>27534286
>not some faggot /pol/tard shithead spamming the thread with CP
>>27531136
That's some nice booty
>>27531136
nice ass
>>27534863
>>27534881
you two has good taste
>>27534863
>>27534881
>>27535337
Requesting more maple
>>27531188
freaking nice
here's the original for anyone who wants it
>>27531188
>maple on the last panel
Ayy lmao
>>27532869
You rang?
>>27536042
>panics in mexican
>>27536081
>asustado in american
>>27536081
There's nothing to be afraid of amigo.
>>27531136
>Maple without a hat
LEWD
>>27537109
>>27537350
You're a rectum dominatior, you faggot.Also nice gif
>>27537402
made it about 2 years ago in the original amber and maple threads.
>>27538244
hos do those leaves stay there?
>>27538476
Willpower.
>>27531146
What a cutezebra
>>27538244
And on this one she's sad for some reason.
>>27535337
>commie eyes
>>27538611
thats a really shitty comic familia.
>>27539075
this guy needs to work a little on faces.
>>27538611
>>27539056
i agree, that was antihumor. it was sucking the fun out of you by looking at it.
>>27540718
majestic as fuck
Be nice to your burger brethren
They love you too
And stop talking shit about American education
Is there a Straya pone? If not i have an idea for a design.
>>27544137
what would be the idea?
>>27538244
I-,I...
I've been searching for so long. But I never found a Swisspone. Thanks Anon you just made my day alot brighter f-faggot.
Lang lebi d' Eidgenosseschaft!
>>27545866
>>27545878
did these end up getting posted last memorial day?
>>27531867
Enjoy your vacation.
Why is America pony called Amber? America is already a female name or just Meri. Or Erica.
Why not just used the country names like Polandball?
>>27545987
her name is Amber Grain, and canada is Maple Leaf. they sound like pony names.
>>27545998
That's gay.
>>27545987
the reason we called her amber it's because of am of america, and the ber was because of the grains that grows in the fields of freedom
the grains are used for bread, flour, beer. we chose ber as a reference to the good american beer
am-ber: perfect
>>27546070
american beer grain
perfect
>>27546070
terrible bait
>>27546070
oh, i thought amber was for the color of her beautiful urine as she evacuates her bladder onto terrorist scum and liberals, as well as anyone with that fetish.
JUST
>>27546111
it isn't bait. that's how it happened
>>27546132
she has a liberal mind with conservative values. she probably would tell you that leave your fetish at home
>>27546132
>v_tan_with_that_look.png
>>27546111
How's summer treating you?
>>27546168
>she has a liberal mind with conservative values
more like libertarian.
>>27546168
>her name symbolizes American idiots
perfect
>>27546070
AMBER WAVES OF GRAIN YOU STUPID FUCK
>>27546142
BENIS :DDDD
>>27547128
but i live in america
>>27547168
O beautiful for spacious skies,
For amber waves of grain,
For purple mountain majesties
Above the fruited plain!
America! America!
God shed His grace on thee,
And crown thy good with brotherhood
From sea to shining sea!
>AMBER WAVES OF GRAIN
GET YOUR BURGERFACTS RIGHT
>>27547128
>>27531136
>post country pones
Where the hell is the proto-country pone?
God save Britannia
Bästa ponny
>>27547197
i was talking 'bout the picture
>>27531188
>>27532869
>less tha 10 posts
>country thread already filled with pedos
What is the objective of attention whoring from a 3rd world country?
>>27547381
>>27547391
>beaner trying to be funny
>>27547381
>Being the kind of guy that gets triggered by one post in Spanish
>tfw this is our 'country' pone
Fucking kill me now.
>>27547285
>alicorn
britain, pls.
>>27547552
SHE GAVE BIRTH TO YOU ALL
(Doesn't she deserve at least that; and I'm pretty sure there are a few unicorn versions tho)
>>27547285
>>27547550
Your sharia does not bloody allow it.
>>27547569
stick with the unicorn, its less pretentious.
>>27547592
When will the Great Paki Purging begin?
>>27547614
when guns are legalized and mass produced like in glorious murica.
>>27547620
>glorious
this is probably bait but i'll bite.
>>27547700
>days since last muslim takeover
^:)
>>27547700
>Falling for mass shootings myth
>>27547706
>Muslim takeover
>Not thinking that we will eventually just attack them on the spot and cities like Luton will be liberated from Paki hands
This will be the charter of the land, my American friend.
>>27547311
C-U to the C-K to the O-L-D
NO ONE LOVES THEIR WIFE'S SON LIKE A SWEDE
>>27547730
thats some wishful thinking, considering one of those places just banned their own flag so they dont offend muslims.
>>27547773
Ah, fuck it. You're right. I even remember seeing something that said a large amount of perople thought that England's flag is racist.
>tfw you try to be nice to poor muslim and they just fuck you in return and even threaten to take over Buckingham Palace (something they will never do obviously).
>>27547820
well my friend, when the mass migration of germans, britains, etc happens to escape the muslim horde, youre welcome to come here for your complimentary gun and marksman training.
>>27547849
I'd consider it but even though we are being fucked by muslims
>England has more rain (I fucking love the rain)
>No threat of guns
>Everything is cheaper
>Americans would probably want me dead because of words like 'mum' instead of 'mom'
>>27547882
>everything
What about gasoline?
>>27547882
youre silly.
>we have states where it rains almost nonstop, like oregon.
>that "threat of guns" is a myth. most violence using guns is gang related, and the "mass shootings" (where very few deaths occur) happen less often than lighting strikes. this could also be turned political by pointing out more people die to abortions than guns each year.
>the more expensive merchandise is offset by the higher pay and lower taxes
>americans go fucking nuts over accents. you would literally be the most popular person wherever you go.
>dead OCs
>>27548041
she could be george's wife
i can imagine she being the one who manages to keep him in line
>>27548114
george is ugly as all shit tbqhfamilia
>>27547882
Fellow Brit, and stop feeding the Faux News hype about us being overrun with muslims.
House prices are not cheaper here and you get far less. Petrol is more expensive. Gun crime does exist here, you spag, and it's not the fucking revolutionary war any more. You're as likely to be liked as you are loathed for being YOU, not for being British.
>>27548289
that's the reason
only a true american woman can love an ugly american
>Fox news: "who is this 4chan guy, anyway?"
https://youtu.be/pVhn_tdF3eo
does maple read comics?
>>27547550
>>27548514
sauce?
>>27548776
dan vs
>>27548780
thanks
>>27547144
>>27548477
this 4chan guy runs the anonymous hacker terrorist group
>>27535337
I'd whiz in her weenie!
Boop
Bampo
>10
>>27556230
>9/11
>>27558176
>>27558238
She probably smells as bad as Curry Fury (the india pony)
>>27558450
does she constantly have the runs?
>>27531136
Why doesn't Amber have huge fake crotch tits?
>>27531136
>>27559413
just to wear or what?
>>27559390
Always
And she believes there is a witch in the toilet, which is why she shits in the streets
boop
>>27559554
POO IN LOO
O
O
I
N
L
O
O
She's unbelievably salty at Amber
She gets extra pissed when people confuse her for Curry Fury
>>27563557
who?
>>27563557
She drinkum firewater, lose heap big at injun casino?
Not sober for many moons?
>tfw live in New Zealand
>tfw there is only one not truly horrible NZ OC
>tfw the picture is shared between Australia and New Zealandand both OCs are still shit
For the love of Pineapple Lumps, some artist please fix this!
>>27565671
Oh cool. I expected Australia's OC to be some shitty stereotypical piece of crap.
need a hong kong pony
Do we have a list of all existing country pones?
>>27565874
I call rule 34.2:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lists_of_countries_and_territories
>>27565874
Give me some time, and i'll post the list
I'm on mobile, and the list is in my PC
>>27531136
<- This should be USA-pony.
>>27565874
>>27566418
reach it
>Aryanne Hoofler (germany)
she is german, a nazy, wants to govern the world, has kinky fetishes, and it's a very capable CO. her uniform is always tidy, and her cap never had a stain. her tactics are straight and devastating, giving her the codename of "white-death". her main rival is veronika, and her friends are a pegasus called kyrie and an unicorn called franziska
>Veronika (USSR)
if the wall never falled, she'll be her representative. she comes from russia, loves vodka, chess, snow, going innawoods, and squat. her best weapon is an old rusty mosin from her family that never miss a shot and never got jammed. she has a cute ruskie hat
>Amber Grain (usa pony)
america in her best form: conservative family values, a liberal mind to understand differents points of view, enjoys a good six pack while eating a meat bbq with her friends. she loves hoofball, and protects her sister to the point of attack or kill to anyone who does her wrong. she's the best flier Equestria ever had, and she flies so amazing that any song cuts just to play "danger zone"
>George W. Freedom (usa grypphon)
america in his power trip form: fat, greedy, and almost an asshole. he eats shitloads of burgers, gets into drunk fights, and doesn't give a shit of anything. but don't you dare slander him: he's the loyal and strongest motherfucker you'll ever have. he's rambo when shit hits the fan, and always protects his friends. he owns legally a tank fully loaded and straped. you can see tons of old pics when he was skinny but stronger before his retirement. all the medals he has were earned in action. likes to talk about his military days while his wife serves lemonade and cookies
>>27566915
>Maple Leaf (canada)
the sweetheart of the north. she loves pancakes with marshmellows, hot cocoa, and fall season. she believes in the good heart of people, even if she results hurt. her sister amber always protects her, and one time in a pond they promise to be together forever whatever happens (Brokeback style). she has a warm smile, and she loves to help during hearts warming eve. she loves to play ice hockey
>Lorelei Kernav (dystopian country)
Industria: a strange country only protected by 4 giants walls of cements. but inside, it's a hole different story. Lorelei is the main chancellor, and biggest controler of the country. food, water, services, family, health, everything is under her control. she's a megalomaniac who wants to control the world: literal control. she wants to be the big brother, and no one else. her intelligence and military tactics are cruel, and she do anything to keep people scared and ignorant to mantain herself in power
>>27563557
i bet she is salty cause amber always kicked her ass when they were kids, and made her sold a very expensive piece of gold/valuable for 25 bucks
>>27565419
Since then she's learned regular english
Just about everything pisses her off now because Amber kicked her ass everyday
>>27565671
G'day, cunts!
>>27567219
shouldnt this pic be upsidedown
>>27566929
>implying Canada doesn't secretly hate the USA for being the racist, bigoted, sexist, homophobic, islamophobic, transphobic, stupid, republican neighbor next door. Canada is currently burning and has refused help from the US and Russia. They brought in 3000 South African fire fighters, filmed them singing and doing other stupid shit and there are Canadians who believe the fire was already put out.
It's still fucking burning.
>>27567244
Also added some JPEG to account for Straya's shitty internet
>>27567278
its so realistic
>>27567259
>secret hate for false reasons
neat meme
>>27567366
Fun Fact:
90% of Canacucks are communists who worship Trudeau's feminine penis
>>27567544
if that it's the case, why no one made a story where vero and maple get steamy
>>27567581
forgot the "?"
>>27567581
To keep the people from knowing
Canada will turn on America in WWIII
Um, any greens?
>>27568470
>amber and maple:
Ottoway (!WmS5b3o52Y)
http://pastebin.com/u/Ottoway
The-Ride-Never-Ends
http://pastebin.com/u/The-Ride-Never-Ends
Faggotria
http://pastebin.com/u/Anynomous
Trinity
http://pastebin.com/96HMC1iv
>aryanne:
https://www.dropbox.com/sh/ktfhoqg46glgrtl/AAC5kDsQewYI8sNzf5aUk4Qla/Stories?dl=0
>veronika
http://pastebin.com/u/BabsZeeb
>lorelei
part 1: https://desustorage.org/mlp/thread/26357953
part 2: https://desustorage.org/mlp/thread/26515968/#q26530568
>>27558201
W H I T E
H
I
T
E
>>27568742
havent had a dedicated writefag in 2 years
>>27569095
someday, the green will comeback
>>27568742
i kind of want to write now...why must i be in another thread
>>27568847
boop
>>27547285
Is there a pone for Anglosphere?
>>27566792
>not canon 'murica pone
>>27569562
ah, fuck it.
>"-Amber, we're here-"
"-Hzuh-who-what?"
>You jump in your seat and brace yourself for anypony ready to get their flank kicked in.
>But instead, you're met with Maple, who's sitting in the seat across from yours and smiling.
"-What's going on?"
>She points a hoof at the train window beside you.
>Scooting a bit closer, you glance out of it, and she joins you.
>Outside you see a small, but bustling town, with cobblestone roads, hay houses, large, open fields and a huge forest surrounding the far reaches of it.
>You see ponies flying and trotting around, fillies running and playing, and a lot of them talking and stuff.
>"...Isn't it great, Amber?"
>You scan the place for a few more seconds.
"...I think it's shit.-"
>The train brakes and quickly flings you on top of Maple.
>Once you recover, she just blushes.
"-Jesus, Maple, what's the blush for? We're sisters."
>"I...I-"
>You fly back to your seat and stretch out.
"Besides, I don't do a pony unless they buy me dinner. You know that."
>She nods and hides a bit behind her hair.
>The other ponies start filing out as the train finally hisses to a stop.
>Once they all do, you follow suit and wait for Maple to come out.
>When she does, she's still blushing.
>You rub the top of her beanie with a grin.
"Aww, little sis is still all hot and bothered."
>Her cheeks just grow a heavier shade of red.
>"Am not!"
>You just grin.
"Ah Maple, you adorable little pony, you."
>You flip around and face the train station of the town.
"Alright, so where in Tartarus are we?"
>She walks past and grabs a map from a small stand nearby.
>"We're in Ponyville right now. It's supposed to be the nicest town in all of Equestria!"
"-Then I don't like it."
>"-What? Why?"
"Because nice is boring, Maple. If hockey didn't have any fights, who the hay would watch it besides you?"
>"Hey! Hockey is a great sport on its own!"
>You sarcastically nod.
"Yeah, and I'm a filly-fiddler."
>She just looks at you.
"Oh, fuck you. Hockey sucks."
>>27566792
>>27571119
Mhm, keep hating on the best country that brought you the show in the first place.
>>27571322
I'm fairly sure those aren't Canadian pones.
Fuck off America and stop trying to steal the glory like you always do.
>>27571342
We don't steal it.
It's just naturally given to us.
>>27571266
Proceed...
>>27571266
I like it.
>>27571356
we aren't the best country but we're okay, i guess.
https://youtu.be/JxieEHPh-J8
>>27571770
I live in America, and I second this.
In my opinion though I prefer to live in Norway.
>>27547285
Fukken saved.
We need more Britannia
>>27571779
cool, what's norway like?
>>27572246
I still live in America. Norway is just a thought for the future if rebellions against Donald Trump break out. But, for what I've read about from Norway: It's kind of expensive to live there, it's a monarchy, you can camp anywhere, they already have Americans living there so if I go there I won't be the only one, the people are nice, and that they decided to knight a penguin recently.
>>27572284
if riots do occur and get violent my plan is canada.
but i don't plan on anywhere starting a riot but Ferguson, Missouri.
What does Africa pony look like?
>>27572393
I was also thinking of moving to Liechtenstein if riots occur here. One of my parents is German so they can help me in that department. Also Montreal, it's in Canada and I happen to know French.
>>27572418
we made some ideas in other threads before
you could check the archive
>>27572418
Not as sexy as Florida pony
>>27572422
not bad.
>>27572964
>florida pony
>sexy
probably looks like ponigg
>>27573080
Florida has lots of spanish and white people
If you're looking for niggers, go a little north to Atlanta
>>27572873
Is there a Cuba horse by any chance?Obliviously not posting from there, with the islands intranet.
>>27571266
More?
>>27574686
More what?
>>27566929
only 4 yet (usa, germany, USSR, canada)? That´s pretty surprising, thought that we´d ponified way more
or some countries were ponified, but just sucked too much
thanks for the list though, anon
>>27573688
No as far as i know
>>27575329
i forgot a pair, sorry.
it's because i separate the list between OC's made by /mlp/ and OC's made by generals of /mlp/
>María Teresa de los Ponyos Paguetti (Ya Es Hora: spanish thread)
she is (was) the main mascot of Ya Es Hora: a spanish thread where all the hispanic people talk spanish events in the latin america and spain sides of the world. she drinks tequila, snorts cocaine, and crossed the border shitloads of times because she blowed all the guards. like any latin girl, she has a nice ass, and loves to party. she works in a food stand selling her delicious home-made cooking (a feat only of latin moms)
>Princess Argenta (argentina)
she used to act like celestia in the spanish threads. she's white to make fun of the argentinian meme. she likes bbq (called asado in argentina), beaches, and lives in downtown Buenos Aires. like any other argentinian, she has a head full of herself.
>Stivalia (italy)
from italy with love. a small beautifull mare who lives in venecia, singing songs of loves and drama. as any other italian, she's a great lover and has lots of culture. but her main disadvantage is having "family matters"
>>27538611
these comics are fine
we need to give Norfolk Island a pone.
>>27566792
That is already fry-pony.
>>27547550
It's the UK ponycon mascot, Brittania.
>>27559479
Do you not understand how fake breasts work?
>>27579229
>>27579229
what are you telling me anon? that you don't like big fake equestrian titties?
>>27578941
Fuck Canada
Stupid mapleniggers
>>27544137
This one was made in one of the previous Amber and Maple threads recently. There's another based off a green too.
>>27580682
G'day cunts
>>27579400
This can't be real. Crotchtit fake breasts?
>>27547700
>le mass shooting meme
guess you're gonna have to keep trying to taze criminals and hope they don't run up and stab you
god help you if there's a mob of them
>>27563557
oh god its a skinwalker
>>27572418
>What does Africa pony look like?
>Africa pony
>Africa
>pony
fucking triggered it would be a fucking zebra you shitlord
>page 10
>>27580682
Oh yeah, thats pretty sweet. Mine was less creative than this. Whats her name? I was thinking Southern Star?
>>27585332
I don't think she's been named yet. The one came up with sounds rather nice. If only, the original drawfag was here.
>>27579400
>>27585332
we used to have a bunch of aussies. i guess they all died.
>>27587148
>What do you think about gun control, Amber?
>"If you have a firm grip you'll stay in control of your gun."
>>27587195
the man who ask her hoof?better be prepared
>Stereotypical as fuck
>'meh'-tier design
Of course.
>>27587399
thats the most murderous expression ive ever seen.
Where the fuck is my Irish pony?
>>27587942
getting drunk, making poetry, or beating a bastard
>>27587942
barfing up whiskey and potatoes.
>>27547285
>alicorn
God damned right
boop
>>27589107
So Maple plays Gridiron, does Amber play Hockey or is she to SCARED cause Maple will thrash her?
>>27590517
its in the pasta
Murica and Cunadia and friends got together and made some pones. The adventures continue with our [error] thread.
Thread Archive: http://pastebin.com/metVf429
>Greens in progress:
Ottoway (!WmS5b3o52Y)
http://pastebin.com/u/Ottoway
The-Ride-Never-Ends
http://pastebin.com/u/The-Ride-Never-Ends
Faggotria
http://pastebin.com/u/Anynomous
Trinity
http://pastebin.com/96HMC1iv
>Drawfriends
Sand
Avion
Ashton
MoonPone
>Note to Drawfriends
Post all artwork to Derpibooru with the tag "amber and maple” to find them easier
Developments thus far:
>Maple Leaf and Amber Grain are sisters, Amber, being the older of the two.
>Maple puts syrup on everything. Amber was initially disgusted by this, but now secretly steals it for some of her own food.
>Amber loves summer, and summer related activities. Maple loves winter, and winter related activities.
>They've done some sisterly 'experimentation' together.
>Amber is ever the alpha, always pretending to be cool with everything. Maple is very passive-aggressive, and will sometimes hint at some things her and her sister have done together in order to knock Amber off her little alpha kick if she goes too far, since she knows it embarrasses her.
>Amber secretly loves hockey and openly loves hoofball, while Maple is the other way around. Amber agrees to watch hockey only if Maple will watch hoofball, and vice versa.
>Maple is somewhat gullible, as she tends to look for the good in ponies. She also has a specific comfort-zone, and gets insecure when outside of it.
>Maple is passive-aggressive until it comes to her sport, at which point it can turn aggressive-aggressive. Maple is usually the peace keeper, until this happens, at which point Amber must quickly take up the role.
>Amber has been known to eat meat in burger form sometimes. This disgusts Maple.
>Amber is extremely enthusiastic about the 4th of July, and Memorial day/Veterans day
>Maple is extremely enthusiastic about Hearth’s Warming eve
Oh my, oh my, this thread is not enough Slav.
>>27590627
how does a slav pony crouch?
boop
>>27590592
I might draw Amber and [Straya Pone] having a beer drinking contest with Maple classily sipping on a glass of Canadian bourbon looking unamused.
>>27592119
THAT'S ALREADY TOO SPECIFIC
THAT MEANS YOU GON DO IT
SO DO ITp-please...?
beep
>>27592119
For the love of the Queen please add kiwi pony, we're like 'Straya's Canada.
>>27592959
>we're like 'Straya's Canada.
Never have I heard a better description of NZ.
>>27592959
Is there a design for NZ pone already? Ah whatever, ill try and make the sketch modular ao if i have to redraw it wont be a problem.
>>27593935
I'm pretty sure the only Kiwi-Pone art is >>27565671
Also, on the topic of Straya/NZ and Amber/Maple hanging out, I'll post some writing on the topic I did LITERAL years ago.
>Who won the lottery? YOU, Southern Cross just won the lottery!
>Well...the Ponyville Charity Raffle, but they were basically the same thing.
>Honestly all you were hoping for when you got a couple of tickets was a gift basket or gift card.
>Yet somehow you managed to snag the grand prize.
>You grin and make your way backstage, ignoring the downcast Stallions (and mares) that you pass on your way there.
>As Princess Twilight and the Mayor thank everyone for their contributions, you slip backstage through the curtains and find your neighbour, Amber Grain, arguing in hushed tones to her sister, Maple Leaf.
>"I should never agreed to this stupid raffle."
>"Come on Sis, it might be fun eh?"
>"Oh yea, tons of fun."
>You clear your throat, and the two mares spin around to face you.
>"Oh, it's you." Amber mutters bitterly, only to receive a nudge to the ribs from Maple.
>"Don't listen to her, she's just a bit sour over the whole thing."
"Given how late she was up last night I wouldn't be surprised of that was the only thing she was sore about."
>If looks could kill, you'd be well rooted from the one Amber shoots at you.
>Maple giggles, and Amber shoots her a look too.
>"So Cross, do know who else you're going to bring?" Amber asks curtly.
"Haven't the faintest, guess it'll have to be a surprise."
>Amber rolls her eyes and scoffs, earning another nudge to the ribs from her sister.
>What they didn't know was that you were telling a porkie, and that you had already decided who to take; your little brother All Black.
>Not that you particularly liked the little dropkick, but after a day of him crashing at your place you'd had enough.
>So why not, you figure that this will at least get him off your back for a while.
>After all, who wouldn't enjoy a being part of a double date with Amber and Maple.
>>27594368
"So, I'll see you ladies tonight then?"
>"Yep, we'll meet up at Amber's place, right sis!"
>Amber grunts in response.
"Sounds like a plan."
>You turn to leave, and hear the sisters launch back into hushed conversation as you exit through the back of the town hall.
>When you get home, you find All Black layed out on the lounge watching the tele.
"Good to see you havn't gotten lost."
>You pass him a rugby ball, which he catches without a second thought.
"Get up ya' mug, we've got a date."
>"A date? No way." He says, leaping to his feet. "Who with?"
"You know my neighbour, Amber?"
>All Black nods his head.
"Well it turns out first prize in that raffle was a double date with her and her sister Maple."
>"Woah, sweet as bru!"
>He gallops upstairs and locks himself in the bathroom.
"Oi you bloody drongo, I need to use the shitter!"
>"Nah it's all 'kay bru, I'll only be a sec."
>A few hours later, both you and All Black are ready for your respective dates.
>While you were harsh on him, you weren't a complete ratbag and agreed to let him take out Marble, leaving you with Amber.
>Not that you didn't plan on doing that anyway.
>As the two of you walk out of your house you spot Amber and Maple already conversing next door.
"G'day ladies, how are we this 'arvo?"
>Amber looks much less cranky than she did earlier, but still answers with a simple "Good."
>Maple on the other hand looks pretty happy, even faced with the prospect of a blind mystery double date.
>"I'm great thanks Cross. Is this your number two?"
>She nods towards your brother, who steps forward and holds out his hoof.
>"Kia ora, I'm All Black. Nice to meet you."
>"It's nice to meet you too, I'm Maple Leaf, and Ms. Unsociable here is my sister, Amber Grain."
>She returns the hoofshake and while Amber continues to stare daggers at you.
"Come on Amb cheer up."
>All Black and Maple walk off, and you fall into step with Amber as she follows.
>>27594378
"I bet if I was some beaut lil' sheila you'd be completely fine with this whole thing."
>"Yep, pretty much."
>Well at least you've got her speaking multiple words.
>You're about to reply when Amber speaks again.
>"Unfortunately, being scene with you all night means I'm going to have colts thinking they have a chance hitting on me for weeks. Months even."
>Full sentences, you're impressed.
"True, but think of it this way."
>She turns her head and cocks an eyebrow.
"Think how much fun it'll be to see them when they realize they don't have a chance and pike."
>You see the corners of her mouth twitch slightly upwards and you swear you hear her give a short laugh.
>"Yea, I guess that'll make it worth it."
>You and Amber hear your respective sibling's laughter and you both you turn your gaze forward.
"Oi Blacky, you regaling young Maple with the story of the time you shagged that sheep?"
>For a moment it becomes so quiet you could hear a gnat let one rip.
>Infact you think you do.
>Then both Maple and Amber burst out laughing, while All Black coughs and splutters trying to say something.
>"Bloody hell bru, what'd you do that for?"
"Come on, you know you're never going to live it down."
>"Yea but you didn't have to spill it infront of the chicks did you bru?"
"Where would the fun in that be though?"
>You grin and slug him in the shoulder.
"So come on, tell me you don't plan on walking around all arvo."
>Remembering he is in fact on a date, All Black perks up at raises his voice so he can be heard over the girl's laughter.
>"Anyway, I know this place that does some choice chips. It's right around the corner."
>By the time you arrive the girl's laughter has died off and you all file in and find a table without incident.
>"So..." Maple starts in an attempt to break the ice.
>"A sheep eh?"
>All Black groans and rubs his face.
>"Look whatever Cross says SHE came onto ME."
>As if to spare him any more embarrassment, a waiter decides to show up and pass out the menus.
>>27594399
>You decide on a hayburger meal, All Black orders a generous serving of chips with his and Maple asks for a bottle of syrup.
>"Quick question, do any of these burgers have a meat option?"
>All eyes at the table turn to Amber, and out of the corner of your eye you notice Maple turn a little green.
>"I'll...see what we have ma'am."
>The waiter walks off towards the kitchen, and you share a look with All Black.
"Meat huh? Interesting choice."
>"Well I figured why not, after it is a special occasion."
>There was so much sarcasm dripping off that sentence that you were afraid that it'd stain the tablecloth.
>You're not sure whether you prefer this Amber over silent, tranquil fury Amber.
"Meat just seems so hard to come by in Ponyville, stuff's almost as rare as a decent jar of Vegemite."
>"That's not a problem is it?"
"Not at all, I cook snags up for my mate Gniezno all the time. We'll have to get you over for a barbie some time."
>Still, you were cunning as a dunny rat, and two could play at this game.
>"So do either of you two do any sports?"
>Amber jumps in and answers before her sister can.
>"I played hoofball in college, could've gone pro if I didn't join the Air Force."
"Real hoofball or gridiron hoofball."
>She turns you, and you can see the look from earlier is back.
>"'Gridiron' hoofball IS real hoofball."
>You quietly scoff, and share another look with All Black.
>When you look back you notice Amber AND Maple staring daggers at you.
"I'm just saying, gridiron players have to be pretty soft to wear all that gear when it has the same amount of physical contact as rugby and real hoofball."
>Forget tranquil fury, the girls look absolutely spewin'.
>If not for the 2nd intervention of the waiter you reckon you'd have had better chances of surviving against pack of hungry dingos.
>"Look, how about we agree to disagree and tuck in to our feed? Yea?"
>You can tell it's hard, but the girls decide to eat their food rather than you.
>>27594410
>You have a quick squizz at Amber's burger, and see that the chef somehow managed to get some meat.
>To be honest it looks a tad undercooked.
>Amber doesn't seem discouraged as she bites into the burger, sending a cascade of juices dripping down her chin.
>Amber Fact No.29: She's a bit of a messy eater.
>Not wanting to crack a fat right there in the restaurant, you turn you attention to the other two occupants of the table.
>Somehow All Black has finished off his platter of chips, and is in the process of stuffing the survivors into his hayburger.
>Maple's dinner seems to be inundated with several sticky layers of syrup, and at one point she just skulls the rest of the bottle.
>You chuckle, and tuck into your own food.
>"What's so funny?"
"Just remembered a funny joke."
>"Oh? What was it?"
>Well, time to think on your hooves.
"Did you hear the one about the tip?"
>Like clockwork, All Black chimes in.
>"Oh don't tell that one bru, it's rubbish!"
>The sister's give the both of you confused looks, and you explain that 'tip' is slang for garbage dump.
>Maple chokes back a laugh, narrowly avoiding sending half eaten, syrup covered food everywhere, while Amber just rolls her eyes.
>The rest of the date progresses without incident, some drinks, a few more jokes, civil conversation, the works.
>Eventually you all decide to call it a night and make your way out of the restaurant.
>You subtlety pull All Black to the side while the girls are talking.
"Oi, don't stay out too late now, 'kay?"
>"Yea, no prob bru."
>You hoof bump and, being the gentlecolts you are, escort your dates home.
Kiwi life is the good life, cuzzies.
>>27594419
>You and Amber walk in silence for a while, what would be a romantic moonlit walk ruined by the storm clouds over head.
"Looks like it's gonna start pissing down any minute."
>"Yea, I heard the weather patrol planned an overnight storm."
>That short conversation thread runs it's course and you're back to silence
"So..."
>"So..."
"You can't say you didn't enjoy tonight."
>Amber looks at you and you swear you see her smile.
>"Well, I can."
"Ah, but you'd be telling a porkie, wouldn't you."
>"That's for me to know..."
"And me to never find out."
>You guess the end of her sentence, and judging by her smile, you were right.
>"I did enjoy one thing."
"Oh?"
>"Yea, you were right earlier when you said how fun it'll be to lead some poor stallion on until he realizes he never had a chance."
>Somehow, you've made it back to her house without realizing it.
>"I think I'll start now."
>Amber turns and runs the tip of her tail along your chin as she sashays to her front door, wiggling her plot all the way.
>She turns and looks you right in the eye.
>"Goodnight Cross~"
"What, no goodnight kiss?"
>Amber scoffs and disappears inside.
>Leaving her front door wide open.
>You'd have to be a bloody idiot not to miss something that obvious.
>>27594442
>"Well, what happened next?"
>You smile as you take another swig of beer.
>Gniezno, Lucky and Anon are all leaning forward, hanging off your every word.
>You place your glass back on the table, and silence settles over the table.
>You clear your throat, and resume your recount of last night's events.
"I said to the mare, 'Are you trying to tempt me?'"
>You smile even wider.
"Because I come from the land of plenty."
>A look of horror settles on Gniezno's and Lucky's features, while Anon looks on, confused.
"And she said, 'Oh, you come from a land down under! Where the mares glow and colts plunder! Can't you hear can't you hear that thunder? You better run, you better take cover!'"
>Anon bursts out laughing while Gniezno and Lucky groan and bang their heads into the table.
>"Come on Cross, you can'ah leave us hanging like that."
>You clear your throat, and settle into your best impression of Ponyville's boutique owner.
"A gentlecolt doesn't kiss and tell."
>That earns another round of groans.
>"So Cross, was there any 'hanky panky' or not?"
>You put on your most serious expression and look Gniezno right in the eye.
"Yes, I made sweet, passionate love to Amber right there at her front door."
>"Really?"
>*Beat*
"Nah I'm just pullin' your leg."
>Lucky gives an exasperated sigh, and moves to down the rest of his drink.
"I rooted her in her bed. Like I said, I'm nothing but a sophisticated cunt."
>A cheer goes up around the table and you wonder what will happen between you and Amber now.
>Truth be told, as far as you remember the two of you had a few too many drinks when you got to Amber's house, and the two of you ended up passing out on the couch.
>Not that you'd tell your mates that.
