Previous thread: >>27391175
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>>27413118
DONG RING!
Do mannequins have a use for dong rings?
>>27413118
YES.
>>27413118
>mfw it's dong ring
>>27413118
SHUK. Why u do this?!
>>27413166
Would a mannequin need a dong to begin with?
>>27413118
Glory to the dong ring! May it always maintain our erections!
I don't really care for dong ring, but the amount of autism it causes makes it tolerable
>>27413194
The best ones do.
>Built-in cooler and reservoir for lonely estruses
>>27413118
>anon has a maniac like laughter even though hes not evil
>he cant control it, and pones think hes evil
>he scares the pones because he's their equivilent of a cackling witch/monster
>eventually he finds a pone that has a eldritch abomonation fetish
>sexy times with hands and magic dick milking ensue
>>27413118
truly le epic maymay
>>27413218
So...did Twilight just give us magic prostitutes?
>>27413234
>"Please ignore them when they cry and plead for you to stop. They only THINK they're in distress and pain."
>>27413233
>>27413209
>>27413167
>It's the Apple's yearly pie-eating contest
>Mares from all over Ponyville enter
>Stallions too embarrassed to be slobs in front of everypony
>Anon joins in
>Wins shortly after jamming his face directly into the pie
>Apple Bloom watches on in awe as Anon makes her kokor go doki doki
>>27413328
Forgot the pic
>>27413118
>Dong ring
>>27413328
>kokor
>kokor
>KOKOR
心, こ こ ろ! トリガアアテ‼︎
>>27413495
Can you translate that from moonrunes for the rest of the class?
>>27413495
My codeword goes donkey donkey
>>27413505
Heart, KOKORO! TRIGGERED!!
>>27413565
It still doesn't make any sense.
>>27413169
It's NOT!
Stop perverting this intimate romantic moment between Daring Do and her ex enemy. It's their first day of a happy life and adventures together.
>>27413590
Kokoro is misspelled. Japfag got mad.
>>27413593
Sexy adventures
>>27413074
I would read a story in which anon's mannequins come to life and are harmless but incredibly creepy.
>>27413620
Innocent, creepy mannequins that can't move if Anon is looking at them. Like Weeping Angels only from a less shit fandom.
>>27413620
>#5, no wait, Joe, walked over to you
>Apparently they don't like being associated with numbers anymore, so they just picked a few names from a list that they felt fitting
"Uhh. Hi, Joe. How's it been?"
>"..."
>Right, they don't talk
>Joe pulled out paper and quill and began scribbling furiously onto it before presenting you the text
>'I want a dick.'
"Umm, OK? Like, do you mean one made of felt, like the rest of you, or-"
>Joe underlined 'dick', twice and then proceeded to write 'DONG RING' underneath it
"...Fuck it, I'll try."
>Joe gave you a thumbs up and walked away
>It's hard playing God sometimes
>>27413670
>"A-anon?!"
>You look up from your book to find one of your awful friends standing stalk-still in front of Twilight.
>"I.... I looked up and h-here he is..."
>It's got a plate of....raw meat in its' hands.
>It's really worrying how possessive of you they are.
>>27413765
>Joe starts wearing Anon's clothes
>Pretends to be him
>Ends up trying to kill Anon and assume his identity
>Ponies don't do anything because oh that silly colt drama am I right sister?
>>27413798
>mannequins not actually threatening them
>just don't understand that herbivores are a thing
>or how to cooking
>>27413798
>Mannequins want to have a barebeque
> Ponies think the cuss words Anon exclaims are the names of his Gods
> "Could you tell me about Mother Fucker?"
>>27414174
The ponies only need to know of the one true godAVE NEX ALEASALUTO NEX ALEA
>>27413670
>Well shit.
>You hope that someone is fucking with you, because those mannequins that you KNOW you put in the closet?
>Yeah, not there anymore. For some reason they're playing poker. In your living room.
>All you wanted was a glass of water.
>Sometimes you hate sexist magic horseland.
>>27412980
>Animated, faceless, pony manequines.
Cute, albeit a bit creepy.
>Animated, faceless, human mannequins.
NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE
>>27414323
>Like that one thing with the ragdoll ponies?
>>27413228
>That colt was trouble, you could feel it in your cutie mark.
>After he was dumped in Ponyville by your Mentor, the all knowing Princess Celestia you really reconsidered how sane she was.
>Deep down your feelings were conflicted.
>On one hoof he was a colt, completely helpless and misguided at most.
>On the other, his strange and often evil tendencies were unnerving.
>Keep calm filly, you’re the damn Princess of Friendship, if you can’t solve this then nopony can.
>Time to observe this exotic stallion and figure if there were ill conceived ideals and plans in his heart.
>”Five bits are you kidding me?”
>He was buying apples.
>There was more to this you could tell.
>”Now lissen here, I charge the same price every day, ether five or go buy them elsewhere.”
>Oh this was it!
>The colt looked frazzled, he was going to do something.
>Then you would swoop in and bam!
>”You’re the only one who sells apples here! You know what fine. I’ll go get some pears or something.”
>”Pardna them is fighting words where I’m from.”
>Come on Applejack keep going…
>”PEARS! PEARS! PEARS!”
>The colt’s loud proclamations of a fruit which wasn’t of the apple kind was starting to draw a crowd.
>And Applejack looked like she on the verge of just jumping over her cart and attacking the evil being.
>”Princess why are you in a bush?”
>Holy fihiehifoefmo!
>Jumping up from the sheer terror of being found you realized that gravity still worked as you came crashing down.
>The little filly scurried away in fear as you collected yourself.
>Wait…
>Drat! In the split second your attention wasn’t on the evil colt things went really downhill.
>The market looked like a warzone.
>Applejacks back hooves were sticking out of a barrel full of apples and the colt was walking away with an armload of apples.
>You missed it.
>The investigation shall continue.
>>27414461
Was that supposed to be green?Also, I have no idea what you're talking about.
>>27414486
>Damn ponies were going to drive you to drink, that is if there was any damn alcohol in this fucked up world.
>When you got here you made peace with the fact that you were stuck.
>But what pissed you off was when they told you that you didn’t get much of a choice on where you were going to live.
>Its cool though.
>You don’t hold grudges.
>Unless its apple horse, she can go to hell.
>Five bits for apples, you fucking kidding me?
>You resigned yourself to just getting some other fruit, but that was when all hell broke loose.
>The pink one, a demon with curly hair went plowing through everyone at a speed which should have been impossible.
>Knocking ponies and stalls over without so much as a how do you do?
>Explosions that would make Michael Bay proud followed in her wake.
>With fear you deposited five bits as the apple horse struggled to dislodge herself from the barrel she got thrown into.
>Picking up a few apples you headed home.
>This place was scary.
>>27414621
No one can stop the Pink One. Not even appuhls.
>>27414621
mfw my prompt was used to make a good green
>Anon bitches about how valuable gold is and how he can't believe they make their coins out of it
>Jews out and rants about how his people's coins are made from copper and bronze and nickel
>Little does he know that those metals are incredibly rare and valuable in Equestria, while gold is common and worthless (hence five gold coins being used to buy a bushel of apples)
>Cue ponies trying to trick Anon, thinking he's a clueless idiot when it comes to finances like most colts are
>>27415124
>The pocketful of change Anon brought with his pants could metaphorically buy and sell Ponyville
>>27415132
>Fortunately, Jewnon would never so much as give a penny to those meshuggah ponies, oy vey.
>>27415124
>>27415132
>Whenever Anon gets small change, he rolls it and sticks it in his desk
>That desk, and its contents, are the only things that came with him to Equestria
>While Twilight studies his computer and Applejack sketches plans of his multitool, Rarity struggles to open the bottom drawer and discovers Anon's rainy day fund
>About $200 in nickels, dimes, and quarters
>>27415124
>>27415132It's just like that one dead SiM story.
>"Oh hey, neat. Anon? These look like coins."
"Yeah, that's right. It isn't much - just pennies, nickels, and dimes."
>"N-nickels? Wait, are they actually /made/ of nickel?"
"I think so? At the very least they're nickel-plated steal. But yeah, there's nickel in them."
>"....."
"...Twilight?"
>"A-and... uh, and the pennies?"
"Same deal, but they're made with copper instead of nickel."
>"Whoo. Okay, wow. Can I grab a few? F-for research! Research purposes!"
You think Rarity would get mad at Anon for cumming inside of her because it would drip all over her coat?
>>27413118
I am suddenly unable to open up the pastebin site. The fuck?
>>27415341
Operator error, it still works for me.
>>27415341
something something faggot
>>27415325
Its better than getting it in the sheets, or her mane
>Anon has a bunch of old coins lying around because he dumps his change into a jar when he gets home but loses the jar every few months
>Along with his piles of assorted junk, he has enough wealth in rare-for-equestria materials that he could outright buy canterlot and the mountain it sits on
>He doesn't actually know just how valuable his junk is
>Mostly he's keeping it because it's what he's got from earth
>The only ponies he's really let get at much of anything are the research ponies working on replicating his tech
>Twilight knows about his wealth
>She's decided he's evil because of what those other guys earlier on mentioned with laughing and that shit
>"What would somepony rich and evil do?"
>"They'd hire ponies to do their dirty work for them, of course!"
>Twilight is constantly trying to find links back to Anon from every evil plot that she finds
>Changelings invade the state fair and steal all the ribbons?
>"IT'S A HUMAN CONSPIRACY!"
>Discord loses his favorite violin and rampages in anguish trying to find it?
>While Fluttershy is off in Canterlot, where she can't intervene?
>"OBVIOUSLY ANON'S WORK!"
>Meanwhile Anon just wants those research ponies to hurry up and fix his coffee machine
>>27415456
>Twilight bursts through his door with exactly one ponice officer she managed to convince
>"I have you now, Anon!"
>Anon's standing in his kitchen wearing a bathrobe, holding a newspaper and a mug of coffee
>>27415456
>>27415596
That's cool and all thatBUT IS IT RGRE ENOUGH?
>>27415596
>After some embarrasment Twilight and the ponicemare leave
>A few weeks/months later copies of Anon's coffee machine start being sold
>Anon soon has the ponice conpletely in love with him
>They love their brand new coffee machine, and those who were responsible for them getting it
>To a somewhat unhealthy degree, to be quite honest
>Those shrines they made are just a little bit creepy
>Twilight grudgingly admits defeat, for now, as she tends to her own shrine of the coffeebringers.
>>27415632
I think that rumors about Anon sitting on a mountain of wealth would probably a lot of greedy mares out of the woodwork to woo anon
>>27415684
>Looks like you’re rich in the land of horses.
>All that pocket change you had when your ass got dumped in the land of friendship, rainbows, and all that happy horseshit was worth a lot.
>Now you had to deal with the repercussions of having it made.
>”My name is Fleur De Lis and…”
>Slamming the door in her face you grumbled and went back to the couch.
>That was the fourth damn suitress this morning.
>None of them give a single shit about you, all they care about is the fact that you’re loaded.
>Caramel told you before to be careful.
>Mares would herd up with a rich colt, live with him for a little bit, then kick his flank to the curb with nothing.
>The mares might be in charge here but at least some things are the same as on earth.
>”Anonymous the Human we have come for your hand in marriage!”
>The walls of your home shook from the loudness.
>Looks like that mare from Neigh York was back.
>”And we bring pizza!”
>Okay maybe you’ll at least hear what she has to say.
>>27415632
>Twilight bursts through his door with exactly one ponice officer she managed to convince
>"I have you now, Anon!"
>Anon's standing in his kitchen wearing a bathrobe, holding a newspaper and a mug of coffee
>Twilight respectfully looks away from Anon until he puts on something decent.
>Anon offers her and the officer (ponice officer Cuddle Wings) breakfast, which they politely thank him for.
>They sit and wait at the kitchen table and make an effort to avoid talking about things that would not be right to bring up around a stallion
>Anon putters around the kitchen to make a hot breakfast from scratch for three people.
>Well, TWO people first; once their meals are ready, THEN he'll start making his own breakfast.
>Anon crosses his legs when he sits down and makes sure to tighten his robe so that it doesn't reveal too much of his chest to his guests.
>>27415690
What would the pony equivalent of a big fat Italian look like? Are there any famous breeds of Italian horses?
>>27415720
The bardigiano is a pretty famous breed, there's also catrias and plenty of others.
>>27415753
"Ay, yo, Anohn'mus! You gonna come out 'ere or what? I got this, uh, buckin' peetzah 'ere, right? Got it made fresh from muh fav'rit cousin's restaurant!"
>>27415788
I kek'd
>>27415753
>>27415788
>"AYY BADA BOOM! ANONYMOUS! MY FAVORITE GREEN MONKEY FUCK! HOWS YOUS BEENS?"
>>27415690
“This bullshit and I say no.”
>”Anonymous it’s not that simple where you can just say no.”
>Glaring at the obviously uncomfortable princesses you sipped on your delicious coffee.
>”The nobles have been pushing for us to act, a law we had even forgotten about is forcing our hoof.”
>You knew what they were going to say but wanted to hear it straight from the horses mouth.
>”You have to marry, the law is simple, a stallion with financial wealth cannot simply remain single out of possibly mismanaging the money and losing it.”
“So let me get this straight before I kick both your royal flanks out of here.”
>Setting down the coffee mug so you didn’t spill any over what was going to happen in the next minute.
“I need a mare to tell me how to handle my money.”
>Both Celestia and Luna nodded apprehensively.
“Okay then, allow me to retort.”
>Any pony passing by would have shit their non-existent briches over the sight that morning.
>Both rulers being tossed out and landing on their rumps.
>By the human no less.
“Sparkle get your fat ass out here now!”
>Waiting impatiently you tapped your foot.
>These royal assholes wanted to play? You’d play.
>Moments later a visibly frightened princess stood just beyond the doorstep.
>Fear kept her from going any further.
>Groaning you walked up and picked her up slinging her under your arm and walking toward the courthouse.
>”Anon set me down, this is embarrassing!”
“No time, we’re getting married, so tough cookies.”
>>27415813
>anon is freaked out by babs hanging out by his house telling him about an "offa ya can't refuse capiche."
>>27415873
Keep going
>>27415877
So, what would be the equivalent of waking up with a severed horse's head by the bed if Anon refused?
>>27415901
She cuts off her own head and leaves it on Anon's bed.Marshmallow ponies grow bits back
>>27415901
They take away his Mr. neigh neigh pillow.
>>27415901
Cut computer power cord
All his meat spoiling in the open air
Boston creme donuts...with the filling removed.
>>27415873
YESSSS
keep going !
>>27415873
I was thinking of Anon fucking off to the undiscovered west and forming Anonistan but that works too
>>27415873
>>”Anon set me down, this is embarrassing!”
>“No time, we’re getting married, so tough cookies.”
>>27415873
>Holy hay you’re married.
>So much for that contest in school where you got voted least likely to get you some dick.
>Whose laughing now?
>Floating the small gold band in front of your eyes you “squeed” before putting it back on your horn.
>Your parents and not to mention Shining and Cadence were going to be furious that you didn’t invite them.
>But Anon didn’t give you any warning.
>That hunk of stallion just snatched you up and brought you down to the courthouse.
>With those big, strong hands of his
>Unf!
>Speaking of hands.
“You know you can put me down now.”
>”Nope, still got two more stops before this whole things done.”
>Colts
>Always making things so complicated.
>Oh tonight is going to be so great, you won’t need an excuse to wear those socks you got last week.
>”Fuck you bird horse!”
>Without even stopping you watched as Anon extended the middle digit of his hand in what you guessed was a greeting towards a passing Pegasi.
>Craning your neck you saw she almost dropped what looked like a potted plant right on top of him.
>She should be more careful.
>Almost hitting your hubby, that slut probably wanted to steal your man.
>Yeah keep on flying filly, he’s taken.
>When this is over you should probably send a letter to everyone to let them know the great news.
>And hide your playmare collection.
>You won’t need those anymore.
>>27415993
>And then she finds out that it's a loveless marriage purely for legal purposes.
>Anon fucks other pone poon.
>>27416009
>It's more of a "Friends with legal benefits" type situation
>She sits there and deflects dumb laws, he stays out of her way when she's researching.
>Ponies no longer bother her about stallions.
>She's clearly married.
>Ponies no longer bother him about being "a stallion"
>He's clearly gotten his wife's permission.
>It's win-winThe sometimes fuck if they're both in the mood
>>27415993
>Marriage certificate from the courthouse… check.
>Several copies mailed to the princess and royal archives… check.
>You felt bad for putting Twilight through all this but desperate times call for desperate measures.
>Those measures being marrying a certain princess with a flank inferiority complex.
>How many times did you catch her at the gym staring at it as she tried losing weight?
>This girl needs to learn that there was nothing wrong with that ass.
>Girls back on earth would kill for an ass like that.
>Now here you sit with a visibly sweating princess on the couch.
>For some reason you smell spaghetti.
“So Twilight”
>”BE GENTLE IT’S MY FIRST TIME!”
>Blown back by her outburst you peaked over the couch edge.
“I was going to ask if you wanted some coffee, but let’s go with something without caffeine instead.”
>”Eh heh heh, waters fine.”
>There’s that spaghetti smell again.
>>27416009
>>Anon fucks other pone poon.
>>27415993
Don't do this to Twilight. She wasn't the one who fucked Anon's life over with the law.Make my favourite chubby little nerdbone feel loved.
>>27416009
>Anon fucks other pone poon.
>>27416060
>This girl needs to learn that there was nothing wrong with that ass.
Twiggy Piggy ass is best ass.
>>27416039
>Sometimes after they fuck, they cuddle under the excuse that they're too exhausted to move
>All that sweat makes them feel cold so they hold each other
>Sometimes Anon feels guilty that he fucked Twilight into a sex-coma, so if he wakes up first he'll make her breakfast the way she likes it
>Once in a while they'll slip up and say "I love you", but they know it's just because they forgot to tag on "your cock" or "your tight pussy"
>Maybe once in a blue moon they'll lay next to each other and enjoy each other's presence while they read a book together. But that's only because Anon's pants are in the way of sex, and Twilight's CLEARLY over-powering Anon making it so that he can't get up. What else can he do but read along with her?
>>27415993
Given the whole pone herding thing this won't really stop the suitors, they would just shift their focus from trying to marry Anon to bugging the hell out of Twililight for the right to herd with anon
>>27416133
>"I-I'm a fat little piggy!"
>Meanwhile, Anon can barely contain his erection.
>Twilight, distraught, assumes Anon's penis is angry with her and wants to pick a fight.
>>27416060
>Two happily crying ponies clutched at your abdomen.
>”Oh thank Celestia!”
>You are confused.
>Both of Twilights parents came as soon as they got the news.
>”We thought for sure she was a filly fooler.”
>Turning to face your wife she looked pale and mouthed “I’m so sorry for this” despite her embarrassment.
>”We thought we’d never see her find a decent stallion.”
>”Mom really?” Twilight was redder than Macintosh.
>”Your brother and his family should be here later today, Oh how I wish you’d told us earlier.”
“Yeah Twilight why didn’t you tell them, were you ashamed of me?”
>Oh this was going to be good.
>”I… butttt… you… usssss”
>Grinning you bathed in her confusion.
>”Hey Twilight a scroll from Princess Celestia just came for you.”
>Spike the resident mailbox came shuffling in holding a sealed scroll which Twilight quickly snatched up with her magic.
>Watching as her eyes scanned the parchment you noted that all color drained from her face.
“You alright?”
>”Consummate the marriage.”
>What the fuck is a consummate?
>>27416238
>Consumate
You need to fuck that certificate to make it legal.
You can trust me, I've been to weddings before.
>>27416238
>>27416251
Do it carefully, you don't want paper cuts.
>>27416177
>Anon's penis is angry with her and wants to pick a fight.
>>27416238
>This is not how you thought your wednesday night would go.
>Apparently to consummate a marriage you had to go balls deep in Twilight mutherfucking Sparkle.
>So here you were in only a pair of your best underwear waiting on the bed for Twilight to come out of the bathroom so you could “do it”
>Tonight you would officially become a horsefucker.
>Not a bad way either and you two were married so it didn’t seem to farfetched.
>Hearing the bathroom door open your eyes trained on the doorway.
>And you waited.
>…
>…
>And the door slammed back shut.
>Grabbing the paper on the nightstand you flipped to the crossword puzzle.
“Hey Twilight five letter word for an archaic dragon?”
>Muffled by the door you heard her voice.
>”Drake.”
“Cool, thanks.”
>It was going to be a long night.
>>27416318
>Meanwhile, Twilight is too fucking scared to go out of the bathroom.
>Keeps going over her thing-to-do-to-please-a-stallion list, her Stallion Wooing for Dummies handbook, and her 1001 post-it stamps with all of the advice the other girls gave her.
>She's about to take a practical surprise test on sex and she doesn't think she's ready to graduate from her virginity.
>>27416381
kek
>>27416381
>Twilight gets nervous
>Nervousness makes her fuck up
>Twilight fails at sex and becomes a double-virgin
>Anon hugs her and tells her she's still his friend
>Even if her horsecunt buried itself deep within her and bricked up the path behind it
>He promises that if she wants to try again later he'll go fetch a sledgehammer.
>>27416403
How?
>>27416408
How what?
>>27416408
Our dick. Duh.
>>27416408
>he does't call his dick 'The Sledgehammer'
>>27416415
>>Even if her horsecunt buried itself deep within her and bricked up the path behind it
>>27416318
>You waited for two hours.
>You even finished the damn crossword puzzle. You might have looked at the answers once or twice.
>Yet still no Twilight.
>Throwing the paper aside you got up and went to the bathroom door.
>Knocking gently you called out.
“Twilight? Everything okay in there?”
>Waiting for a response all you heard was “blurghufho”
>Okay she’s throwing up.
>Opening the door you couldn’t help but feel sad at the sight.
>Twilight Sparkle, in pure white socks with her had in the toilet puking her guts out.
>”Anon I’m so sorry blahihihhundn uhhhg those hayburgers were a mistake.”
>Kneeling down you pulled back her mane so she didn’t get vomit on it.
>You might have been an asshole but even you knew that when a girl hurls like this it’s the least you could do.
“So is this because of the food or the sex thing?”
>”Blafhhsjjksl ugghhh my stomach, the second one.” She managed to mumble through.
>You stayed there and waited until she got it all out of her system.
>After a few minutes you reached under her and picked her up cradling her small body in your arms.
>Carrying her into the bedroom you laid her down on the soft cushiony bed.
>”Anon I’m sorry.”
“It’s alright. Get some sleep.” You said sliding into bed with her.
>Wrapping your arm around the purple pony you brought her close.
>You were overwhelmed by smell of lavender, how this girl managed to puke her guts out and still smell this nice was beyond you.
>Feeling her relax and settle against your chest, you closed your eyes and fell asleep.
>You both could try again tomorrow.
All this adorable sparklebutt is making me very happy
>>27416587
daww
>>27416587
I'm loving this adorkable Twiggles
>>27415788
Das racist.
>>27415684
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qBlt_zN-NhE
>>27416587
I'll continue tomorrow, here's a bin for anyone interested. http://pastebin.com/GQgFBSFa
>>27416587
>Anon and Twiggy return to Ponyville for their honeymoon
>Friends are disappointed that Twilight never invited them to their wedding
>Pinkie is assmad that she never got to throw Twilight a bachelorette party
>>27416303
Chicks love scars. It shows you're dedicated.
>>27416509
>Not calling your dick "A Weapon Of Ass Destruction"
>>27416749
You're doing good anon. Keep it up.
>>27416726
You can't be racist against Italians. They aren't people.
>>27416799
This. You did good, Anon. I'ma let you fuck my dad.
>>27416749
Will wait for more.
>>27416587
>You were overwhelmed by smell of lavender, how this girl managed to puke her guts out and still smell this nice was beyond you.
d'aww
>>27416749
holding you to that, anon
>When Anon slaps Celestia on her cutie mark, the sun flares briefly
>When Anon slaps Luna on her cutie mark, the moon cycles through its phases
>This idea by itself isn't RGRE, but it's really cute and I'd pay money to see it brought to life into an RGRE story
>>27415873
>Kicking out best wife horses for twiggles. Look man, I'm not against Twilight coming in too, but let's not be hasty.
>>27417138
He's so cute yet so fucking punchable, it hurts my limbic system.
>>27417138
10/10, would herd with.
Is a cutie mark like just fur growth/pattern, or is it more of a skin tattoo?
>>27417213
~ M A G I C ~
>>27417138
>Anon confuses cute Pegasus for a mare since he acts so feminine.
>Pegasus thinks Anon is a mare because of how he acts.
>After a night of drinking both go home together.
>Anon learns that the Pegasus is a stallion and vice versa.
>He still plows that cute little ponut filling it with his seed.
>Colt no longer cares Anon is a guy since he gets all the fucking he could want with cuddles after.
>Good end
>>27417100
I'd read it.
>>27417100
>slaps Cadance on her cutie mark
>every mare within a fifty foot radius goes into heat
>>27417326
>Slaps Spike on his cutiemark
>Both wonder why Spike now has a cutiemark
>>27417326
>Slap Chrysalis on her flank
>She turns into her most recent disguise
>>27417353
I thought booping did that.
>>27417353
>Slap Chrysalis on the ass
>her midsection starts glowing
>>27417371
like a cum filled lava lamp.
>>27417353
>Slap Shuk on his dookie mark
>He writes another Cheerilee Story
>>27417371
>There is a noticeable cracking noise as you do so
>>27417371
>Slap Chrysalis on her flank
>Her belly lights up and she tells you what time it is in a monotone voice
>>27417371
oh geez they're back
>>27417371
>Slap Chrysalis on her booty
>Moments later.
>WUD WUD WUD
"E-easy baby! Be gentle!"
>"DO YOU FEEL ME IN YOUR BLOOD LIKE FIRE?!?"
/rape/ is always interesting in RGRE
>"I'm gonna make you cum INSIDE me!"
>>"N-No! I don't want you to get pregnant!"
>>27417371
>smack it right in the middle of one of her monologues in front of the ponies
>both her midsection and face begin to glow as she squeaks out her last word
>>27417459
All future conflicts and villains now end before any battle due to Anon simply giving the baddy a nice firm spank on the hindquarters.
>>27417478
Even Sombra?
>>27417482
Especially Sombra.
>>27417482
>Slap Sombra on the flank
>A crystal garden display erupts from his horn
>Which he then promptly eats
>>27417488Beatme to it
>>27417482
>>27417488
He has no ass to smack, he is mist.
>>27417518
That's quitter talk, Anon. Believe in the booty.
>>27417511
Carlos! how did you get out of the dungeon!?
GUARDS!!!
>>27417581
mexicans are known prison breakers
>>27417581
Your guards had a terrible sense of humour. I didn't appreciate theirpunch line
First timer rgre here. Can someone explain dong ring to me?
>>27417677
It's a forced meme that's incredibly unfunny.
>>27417683
>dong ring
>not funny
>>27417677
It's RGRE skub.
>>27417711
It isn't.
>>27417677
What >>27417728 said
>>27417242
yes
>>27417677
>Picture of dong ring being given to whatshisname gets used as OP by someone
>Gets used again for OP image in the next thread
>A different picture is used for the one after that
>Back to Dongring.jpg
>Dongring.jpg strikes again
>Artfag makes us a bunch of pics
>You thought you were getting new pics? It's dongring again
>People notice a trend
>[Dongringposting intensifies]
>>27417823
wut
>>27411017
I am by no means an expert, but the use of a giant robot usually comes down to they are all terraine when they are stuck on a planet, and have mass utility when they are in space. They can do almost any job well, but no job perfect.
Then you have the pilot interfaces, some shows put the human mind into the robot, and i'm betting money if I had to pilot a robot with my mind, a human facsimile would be easier to control then a normal tank.
More or less, giant robots are all sci-fi to an extent that you have to willing to go with it to accept the concept.
>>27417823
Oh, the Dong War goes further back. It was merely declared when BGF drew the pics.
>>27417100
>When Anon slaps Luna on her cutie mark, the moon cycles through its phases
>It cycles through like a roulette wheel being spun
>When it lands on the winning phase, [jackpot noises] can be heard
>You smile in childish glee as moon pies fall out of her vagina
>And take your winnings to the spank bank of just desserts
>>27417100
>>27418339
Somehow this reminds me about this one thread...
This horse is old and stale.
>>27418781
>tfw no pregnant pegawaifu
>>27419294
I've noticed some really like pregawaifus. Can you tell me what makes them so attractive?
>>27419311
A sign of trust and love and the desire to remain together long enough to raise someone who is an equal parts you and your partner?
>>27419545
>>27419545
No I meant why especially pegasi?
>>27419722
Because after they preen themselves, you can collect their feathers and make super-soft pillows.
>>27419837
Sounds soft and comfy.
>>27419837
>Your birdpone waifu will never gift to you a pillow filled with her impossibly soft discarded feathers that she'd collected over the course of years
>>27419837
>Pegasi show off to their mates through presenting pillows made with their feathers
>The softer, the better
>>27420693
This is why napping is such a big part of Rainbow's life. Sleep and comfort are intimately linked to desirability as a mate.
>>27420794
Of course.
>>27419722
>>27420794
>Sleep and comfort highly important
Does this make Luna highest tier of waifu? How soft are her feather pillows?
>>27421263
They're so soft you can't feel them
>>27421564
>they're so soft you can't feel them
>yet when you try sleeping without it, your nights are worse and you are uncomfortable when trying to sleep
>>27421564
>You can't feel them because if you even touch them, their softness just puts you to sleep
The best.
>>27421263
Touch them.
>>27421564
>They're so soft you can't feel them
>Sleeping in a bed made of Luna's feathers feels like sleeping in the air.
>Literally.
>>27421564
Her wingjobs kind of suck because of this.
>>27415190
>rarity shits a brick
>>27416587
>Watching with eager interest you saw Twilight shrink as her six friends all surrounded her.
>Questions flying a mile a minute.
>Normally you’d step in and put a stop to something like this but it was just too much fun to watch.
>”Darling how could you? Oh just think of the dress I could have made! Oh and the maid-of-honor dress would have been equally as splendid.”
>”Calm down Rarity, ahm sure Twilight here has a good reason for keeping her friends in the dark, right?”
>Smooth apples, very smooth. Can’t tell the sarcasm at all.
>”But darling, as the maid-of-honor I should have been informed immediately.”
>”Hey!” all of them yelled in unison.
>”And what makes you think you’d be the Maid-of-honor huh? It should fall on her best and most awesome friend!”
>Rainbow was now poking Rarity right in her chest, both their faces only inches apart, eyes filled with anger.
>Oh you’re going to get some coffee before all hell breaks loose.
>There’s nothing like watching a bunch of women…
>”BATTLE ROYALE!!!!!!!!!”
>CRASH!!!
>Damn it’s started. Oh well the coffee can wait.
>Somehow in the whirlwind you saw Twilight crawl out and take a seat next to you.
“Not gonna help?”
>”Heh not this time, I’ll let them get it out of their system, then we’ll talk like adult mares.”
>”I will eat your babies!” that sounded like Fluttershy.
>You always figured she had some deep-rooted anger problems.
>>27422381
You wouldn't know.Because she doesn't exist.
>>27422422
WELCOME BACK
>>27422422
>It was decided, there would be a grand wedding in Ponyville.
>Pinkie and Applejack would be in charge of catering, Rarity and Fluttershy would handle the dresses, while Rainbow and Starlight would handle the venue and guest lists.
>You happily agreed, it meant less shit for you to do.
>But despite Twilights and her parents objections you were going to fund this little shindig.
>After all you were loaded.
>”And a bachelorette party!” remarked a hopping Pinkie.
>Yeah and that, it was tradition, you weren’t going to object.
>Besides you were in horseland, albeit a sexist and irrational horseland.
>”Ohh I know the perfect pair of Stallions who specialize in those!”
>Why didn’t it surprise you that Pinkie would, nothing about that mare surprised you anymore.
“Now remember Twilight, if either of them offers any special services I get first dibs.”
>Not that you would, but judging how red in the face your wife got it had the desired effect.
>”I don’t think that’s going to be necessary, right Pinkie?”
>The pink mare without even missing a beat smiled happily.
>”Okie Dokie, just means more dick for me and the girls.”
>You never figured that the pink one would be the most lewd of the bunch but hell if in anything made sense here.
>”Darling we must hurry, no time to waste and all that.”
>Pushing Twilight outside with her magic you watched as they all left.
>Now what?
>Looking towards the small dragon who still looked confused and tried to make himself scarce by everything that was happening you shrugged.
“Want to play poker or something?”
>”I’ll get the cards.”
>>27417138
An rgre world where the stallions are as if not more capable of work/thinking as a mare, but everything works good enough and they don't have to do shit so status quo stays the same.
In this episode of Ponies Take Music Literally, Anon introduces his waifu to the glory that is Meatloaf.
>"I want you! I need you! But there ain't no way I'm ever gonna love you! Now don't be sad, cause two out of three ain't bad!"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k5hWWe-ts2s
>>27421727
>Before she gifted you a pillow, the best sleeps you ever had were when you rested your head on her tummy
>"We have taken the mares' power, and claimed the Crystal Empire for ourselves, the most powerful stallions in the world... But at what cost? Anonymous, was it all worth it?"
>>27423716
CRYSTAALS.
>>27423716
>"Stop being suck an emo fuck and come eat Cadance's pizza with me, Sombra"
>>27423750
Those are very feminine eyelashes.
>>27423760
Sombra wears fake eyelashes in order to seem more feminine, and therefore more fit to rule.
>>27423760
I don't know what you're talking about.
King Sombra might be kind of marely, but he's still a stallion.
>>27423794
Worst villain.
>>27423750
>"We've crippled the leaders of this country in our lust of power, Anonymous. Will our people remember us as heroes, or as tyrants?"
"For fuck's sake, Sombra, Cadence can just BUY herself another pizza. She'll get over it."
>You do your best to ignore the sounds of bitter weeping carrying on the wind.
The real reason Sombra tried so hard to take over the Crystal Empire was because he went to a social event where a colt was wearing his exact same outfit, and SOMBRA was made to go change into something different. He's held onto that petty spite for YEARS.
>>27424172
Petty spite? PETTY SPITE?! Sombra's outfit was perfect! That WHORSE wore the exact same thing just to spite him! Then Sombra had to go change, but he couldn't decide what to wear instead and wound up missing the party! He was a laughingstock! But nopony laughs at a King. Nopony wears the same outfit as a Tyrant.
>>27423760
That's umbra, r63 sombra
>>27417611
page 8 bump
>>27417482
>>27417488
>>27417495
>>27417573
I'm gonna try, because fuck it.
>Be Anon
>Be with the mane six in Crystal Empire, helping Shining and Lovebutt by finding crystal heart >thingie in castle. Barrier falls and ponies start panicking. Pony materializes out of the darkness >right in front of you, facing the mane six on other side of the throne room. Look down, see >plump posterior. Unf. Suddenly realize all bad guys so far have been mares. Lean to the left. >See fangs, cat-like eyes, long mane, dat ass; seems legit.jpg.
> Purplesmarts is talking, she’s distracted. Have only one shot. Raise arm back as far as possible, >flatten hand for maximum area covered.
>Purple stopped talking. The mare growled then opened her mouth. Now!
>“Cry-EEP!”
>Your hand strikes true. Like a lightning bolt your hand flashes down and slaps that ass like a >clap of thunder. The sheer force of your blow clears the sky of clouds and blows the falling >snow away. The echo of your strike rumbles across the valley until there is only silence. The >mare moaned and started spurting out crystal flowers from her horn. Four shots and twelve >crystal plants lay strewn on the ground. Purple looks shocked, the elements looked shocked, the >mare looks shocked, you were shocked, the sky looks shocked. Recovering, you slowly lean >over to her ear whisper while your hand squeezes her rump,
“Naughty, naughty, pony.”
>>27425362
darkness >right in
see >plump posterior
left. >See fangs, cat
possible, >flatten
the fuck is this?
>>27425576
eh, first time green poster. wrote it in word first then copy pasted. didn't translate over well I guess.
>>27425620
It happens. No biggie.
>>27425620
Oh sorry then. Aside from that it was good.
One of the Pinkie Pie clones escaping is now canon.
How does this effect RGRE?
>>27425950
It doesn't.
>>27425950
Did they give her the Tom Preston treatment like the rest of the clones?
>>27425989
I'll bet you're tons of fun in real life, you faggot.
>>27425950
Pinkie now has an accomplice to bring home twice as much cock as before. She can do shit like have a fresh, steaming breakfast of pancakes and waffles ready for the colt she most recently fucked by having her clone make it for her (they alternate between cook and colt-fucker to keep things fair), which gives Pinkie the reputation of being a caring lover. She can go out to all the bars/parties she wants and pick up colts, and her other self will get things ready for her as not to disappoint her cock-meat provider.
>>27426099
Actually no. Rarity was taking about making clones to save time, then Pinkie talked about the time she made clones, completely unaware of the surviving clone right behind her.
>Ponies identify each other mainly through smell
>Anon changes his deodorant
>Suddenly nopony seems to recognize him
>>27426399
>Anon wrestles with Pinkie one day
>Stallions congratulate Anon and mares offer Pinkie high-fives
>catering to the mare gaze
>Mare doesn't want to review movie
>Pony-tumblr colts react by violently shitting themselves and crying with childish impotant rage
>Colts everywhere wonder why mares don't take them seriously
>>27426983
Ghostbusters 2016?
>>27427011
Ghostbusters 2016.
>>27426983
>>27427011
I haven't followed any Ghostbusters news at all so could you explain since this sounds kinda funny
>>27427249
Angry video game nerd made a video stating he would not review and furthermore not watch the new ghostbusters and twitter and tumblr collectively shat themselves.
>>27427269
This. He doesn't like remakes and that makes him a woman-hating man-child.
>>27427269
AVGN is still relevant? I thought he would go the way of the dodo after the terrible movie he made
>>27427269
I don't like the movie because it seem like it's trying to hard to be like the original movie, but god dam those retards can't accept other people opinions
>>27427371
Eh, I thought it was OK. Nothing to really brag about, but it was definitely better than Pixels.
>>27427391
brining back a dumb joke from earlier
>The head of Anon's cock is engorged and red
>A pony's cock is flat and not any particular colour
>Mares get scared of his crotch because they think Anon's dick is angry and wants to pick a fight with them
>>27427371
Not as good as Quest for the Game Child, but it wasn't godawful.
reminder that bigpon is bestpon for spooning.
>>27427411
It's not only his opinion.
Hollywood has been obsessed recently with making cheap CGI knockoffs of 80's cult-followed classics, like Total Recall, Robocop, The Thing, etc.
Most of them have been mediocre to shit so far, and a lot of people are getting tired of it. Ghostbusters (2016) takes the cake because it promises to be nothing but a soulless remake of the original franchise, brought back to life only for the sake of filling someone's pocket with loadsemone. At least Robocop and Total Recall played a bit with the original plot/setting.
We will have to wait to see if it will suck as much as people expect it to, but don't get your hopes high.The only good reboot so far is the A-Team's movie based on the series, which was fucking awesome but nobody saw for whatever reason.
>>27427919
I didn't know they remade The Thing. I really wish I still didn't
>>27427953
Not really a remake per-se, but a prequel to the original movie. It ends with the helicopter chasing the dog-thing out into the snow, where the first movie picks up, so there's no uncertainty at the end like in the first movie since we all know what happens next.
They also replaced all of the practical effects with CGI, so you can imagine how scary it is.
>>27427953
More of a prequel for that and it wasn't bad
>>27427558
You couldn't be anymore wrong.
Bigpon is uncomfortable and awkward. They cannot hug you properly with their legs and they might hurt you with their hooves.
Smallpon is bestpon for spooning.
They are easily hugged and are warm and soft to the touch, like a daki, or a teddy bear. They also feel completely secure and comfortable in your arms which is always a good feel, and you can even pet them until they fall asleep in your embrace.
>>27428063
My niggest of niggas.
>>27428063
Well, we can all agree that mediumpone is too vanilla for proper cuddles and hugs.
>>27428063
Wrong again: Tinypon is best pon. You can hold them in one arm and the'll curl up against you like a cat.
>>27428112
That's a pretty tiny kind of pon.
Fillies would be the size of kittens.
Best pon is smallest pon.
>>27428135
daww
>>27428135
Exactly. I want to scoop up my half human (and yet inexplicably identical to a pony) foal in one hand.
>>27428324
>half human
>identical to a foal
nigga...
>>27428348
Identical to a pony only because the idea of a perfectly-proportioned human head and arms on a tiny kitten-sized pony body is really creepy.
>>27428390
Human babies are pretty ugly.
>>27428410
this is true, but i would like to point out that freshly born kittens arent very cute in the first few weaks and only get to the look as cute as the average kitten when their about a month old, this age in humans is around the time we turn 4-6 is when we would be kittens. after that we start not being cute and turn into teens.
>>27428528
Anon confirmed for having a "preference" for children.
>>27428584
oh, right. i forgot i was on 4chan for a second. no i dont have a preference for children i have a preference for ponys. if i had a preference for children i wouldnt be here i would be on the deep web jerking off to a dead 5 year old.
Thread sure is dead today.
>>27428980
Everything is dead today.
>>27428990
Why's that? Something going on in the fandom or something?
>>27429002
Not just here. Everything is dead. I haven't had a new Youtube video in 5 hours. I'm pretty sure this is how Zombieland started.
>>27429002
My smile died and I am the Fisher King of teh Interwebs.
>>27429002
No. Nothing is.
>pones get into the human world around the time of the cold war
>they are a communist/monarchy so they contact the soviet union
>celestia/luna are invited to one of their hell marches
>they expect to see hundreds of female humans and a small amount of humans males
>hundreds of males and a small amount of females
>they think the soviets are weak and only have an army of forty
>they invade
>get btfo because the mares refuse to fire on the "poor human stallions forced to fight"
>>27429164
ghey
>>27429180
im trying to revive a dead thread ok. the idea doesnt have to be good it just has to inspire somebody to make a good prompt
>>27429205
it sounds interesting anon, follow your dreams
