>must have 3-5 years of job experience
should I just end myself now?
>Put 5 years of gentoo experience on the application
>Sir you've got the job
>>54745191
you can always lie bro
These kinds of job postings are H1-B bait posts, they don't actually intend to hire anyone and they'll just use them so they can beg the government for more H1-B visas because "we literally cannot find anyone in the US to fill the position".
Just lie stupid, say you do freelance computer repair work
>MUST HAVE A BACHELORS OR EQUIVALENT WORK EXPERIENCE, WE WILL CHECK
>MUST have 5-7 years experience working with RandomShittySoftware, WE WILL CHECK
>MUST be willing to work mon-sat hours are not flexible
position: junior IT specialist intern (temporary)
benefits: no
why didnt I just go the liberal arts route
>>54745191
Try to work 3 - 5 years at a new or shit company - then you have 3 -5 years of experience required.
Chances are that shitty company won't even request college diploma - so skip college all together.
>>54745298
if you know how to stretch a resume you can turn 3 actual years into 8 years experience for a 80,000k year job. I'm still super fucking pissed that he got that job while on over here getting kuk'd.
>He fell for the STEM meme
My "useless" liberal arts degree gets me entry-level jobs that pay 45k/year and don't require experience.
>>54745345
well what do you do, I make that with my associates degree I got completely free, in fact I was paid to get it.
>>54745345
>control F
>"useless" 1 of 1
>its from your post
who are you even quoting? its almost as if you knew your degree was useless by nature.
>>54745345
my useless network security degree got me a 75k/year job right out college in a place that has a dirt cheap cost of living
>>54745420
it didnt
>>54745207
I should try that
INTERNSHIPS
>>54745191
they want h1b visas
>>54745676
Not necessarily.
Absurd hiring practices come about when a company puts Human Resources in charge of hiring technical staff.
If you are worth your salt, and you get an interview with a technical supervisor or project manager, you can land the entry-level positions without the "3-5 years experience" bullshit companies have started listing.
>>54745191
Apply elsewhere, anon. There are plenty of fish in the sea.
>>54745226
This. There are tons of fake job postings. Ignore those that have ridiculously high requirements. Ignore job postings by agencies. You won't ever get a reply from them. Ignore anything that's unprofessionally written or don't have the company identified.
>>54745191
Oh so u fucked off while in college?
its called internships OP you should have been doing them during college
>>54745725
didn't i filter you already?
now I did
>>54745345
>>54745790
why are you filtering the falcon? he isnt a bad guy
I have a phone internview for a junior systems network administrator job
any tips?
>>54746369
tell him you do senior work for a junior price
>>54746369
Wear a cool leather jacket
It will greatly boost your confidence and the phone interviewer will never know you're wearing it.
>people don't know how to fake it til they make it
>people don't know how embellish their resumes
>people don't know how to spin their hobbies into work experience
Get an internship familia
>6 months intern while studying
>graduate, perform well in uni and in the work place
>get hired right away
It's probably 99% luck finding a good company. I work in Java/C/C++/MSSQL, flexible work hours - I can come in at 4pm/am and no one would give a shit, lots of benefits and even profit sharing.
Impossible to get in without connections or as mentioned, lots of experience.
>>54746369
yeah, prepare to waste countless hours because something happened to the system in the middle of the fucking night.
connection went down for 12 seconds? better fucking call the admins.
screensaver didnt come up? better fucking call the admins
srsly, DBA where they make you handle the hardware not just the DB along with any kind of sys admin job are shit at best, do not do
>>54746476
>>54746409
>>54746398
thanks
>>54746476
never had a job before and I am a recent grad, I really hope I get this position and do to graduate school at the same time
Lie lie lie lie lie lie LIE LIE LIE. You should be LYING about EVERYTHING.
Every single other person you are competing with are telling lies and half truths.
Growing up I knew an illiterate woman who held an office job. At night she would get her husband to help her do all her work. She was so good at faking it (until she did learn to read) that she kept her job and kept moving up.
Telling the truth on a job app is the dumbest thing you can do.
>>54745191
I N T E R N S H I P S
They also want people willing to lie (shows drive) and able to bullshit like they can do it (shows you didn't just fuck off in school)
>>54746553
See guys? This anon knows what's up.
>>54746446
>people don't know how embellish their resumes
You can exaggerate your skills a little but never put stuff you have minimal or no experience with because they will test you on them.
>>54746446
Ding ding! Changed careers from Biotech to IT four years ago. Always been a hobby, but snagged a CCNA and ran with it. I've been the IT admin of a whole mid-sized company ever since.
>>54746446
>people don't know how to spin their hobbies into work experience
I seriously dont know how to do this
>be college student
>looking at internships to get job experience
>requirements: 2 years of job experience
>>54746809
Kek
>>54746809
>internship
>2 years of previous internship experience required.
>>54746809
>>54747504
get one at your college, I had an internship in the IT department and he is even giving me a recommendation letter
>>54745191
Why do you think you deserve a job?
>>54746369
Don't ever sound desperate.
>>54747623
So when they ask when I could start, what do I say?
It's been 2 weeks since graduation and I havent done shit
>>54745399
>Nigger faggot that doesn't understand meme arrows detected
>>54746398
this. if the hiring manager even gets a hint that you want money you'll be passed on.
whatever question the interviewer gives you, its always that just want to work at the same place for the next 30 years, never want to move positions, never want a raise.
it's been awhile since i've had to interview so i've gotten soft.
it's a brutal game and you have to lie about fucking everything.
>>54747885
that's normal for a grad looking for full time employment. just say now.
>>54745676
This they will be doing this very shortly if not already. Fun time for globalization to rape your butthole. The businesses love it.
>>54745345
>anything under 50k
>good
just liberal arts my shit up senpai
>>54745191
>should I just end myself now?
yep
>>54747885
>haven't found a well-paying full time job doing what you love 2 weeks after graduation
might as well just give up right now
>>54748342
I have a phone interview tomorrow doing what I love
>>54748355
>mfw I love tech interviews but hate working
Why can't people just pay me full time to apply to jobs? Instead I have to solve real problems or some shit, all of which are mundane.
>tfw I recently got hired as an embedded software engineer
>I love C
>55k, loads of benefits, 3 weeks paid vacation, coworkers are total bros
>I'm programming in C# for the first time kind of knowing what I'm doing sort of as a secondary thing beyond C and data analysis in a language of my choosing (I went with python because I'm lazy)
I am 23 years old, I have a computer engineering degree with 8 months experience. Do yourself a favour and make a website to show your projects. Even if they're for school. Be honest and friendly.
>>54748119
Yes, 50k is terrible considered to a fast food job where you're lucky to break 20k. Fuck off, faggot.
>>54745191
you do realise that there are real people checking the people who try for the job
plenty of companys have lofty expectations for the candidates which most of the time dont reflect what they will settle for and what they are ok with
just look up what they are doing and when you like the idea write in if they dont like it they dont buy it you lose nothing of worth by doing that
>>54748422
>he thinks 50k a year is a lot
>>54748450
It may not be a lot but it's enough. If he's happy with what he does then would any more money really benefit him?
>tfw couldn't get an internship and about to graduate from a no name school
Honestly wish I was dead.
>>54745283
Sounds like my company
Protip: the people who write the job descriptions are computer retards.
>>54748463
>tfw graduated with no internship and no name school
>still a NEET after 2 yearz
>tfw +130k debt for useless cs degree
>tfw shitty codemonkey entry level job that pays 55k/year (+ "benefits")
whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
>about to graduate CS meme degree
>discover over the past month that i find webdev way more fun than the stuff i've been taught
>mostly qualified to become a junior java developer instead of a junior webdev
should I just bite the bullet and search for java stuff? webdevs seem to earn less too
