What's a cost effective way to attach myself to a tree to do this?
I am thinking of just winging it, but I heard if you are a cripple, you can't be a real mothafuckin G.
>>901767
Notes:
I was thinking of getting some rope, a carabiner, and making myself a rope harness. I used to climb, so I know how to use them, it's just that rope is $120, and I have no idea where to buy rope/carabiners in the US locally.
counter argument :
You will be remembered as a real G if you die while doing it freehand.
>>901769
Allow me to retort: If I fall, I am probably going to fall on my feet and break both of them in the process, but not die. The tree is like tree stories high - not fatal fall height.
So far Home Depot and Dicks don't carry rope. Wtf fgts.
http://www.amazon.com/Entry-Level-Combo-Spur-Rope-Size/dp/B00FM3FZAA/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1447522318&sr=8-1&keywords=tree+climbing+kits
This and a week long training course on how to climb.
If you get into it this much you could start doing it as a job and make pretty good money, like a couple G a job, no body wants to do this work because it's insane.
You sort of could use some climbing hitches to make a DIY harness, but those things really really fucking suck. They are tricky to get right, and never are comfortable.
>>901778
Nigga, you cray, I am trying to avoid paying $500 for them to fell the tree and do it myself because I can, I am cheaping out on $120 ropes, let alone $600 packages.
Anyway, appreciate the advice regardless. I doubt I will get into it as a job - mainly because these things are usually way harder to get into then people make them out to be, even if you have the skills. Would be awesome to do for even $500 a job, but I don't see that happening, seeing as people with insurance quote me that. +Full time "career" job, so not much time to fuck around. Though again, obviously it would be worth it for $1/2000 a weekend.
>>901781
than* Also, insurance, so that means employer. Employer means large cut into your gross, etc.
A set of tree climbing spikes would be good if you need to climb a fucking three-storey tree. If you look around, you get a used set for under $100.
Enough rope and hardware to get up there is going to run you another $50-100. Do you have a chainsaw?
My point is, if the cutter is asking $500 to fell this tree, that's actually a pretty reasonable price. Do the math and see what your actual savings will be. If the price difference is pretty close, I'd say it's better to let the pro do it, even if you have to save up for another week or two.
>>901783
It's not that I don't have the money or don't know how to do it, it's just that I have other uses for $350-400.
I climbed the tree without gear for lulz yesterday, I am just afraid I will get distracted as I am cutting, etc. Basically kind of like "I can work under my car with just the jack, but not worth the risk."
I think I will just get some sort of attachment like this:
http://www.cabelas.com/product/hunting/hunting-treestands/safety-restraints-harnesses%7C/pc/104791680/c/104783580/sc/104639580/hunter-safety-system-174-rope-style-tree-strap/745316.uts?destination=%2Fcategory%2FSafety-Restraints-Harnesses%2F104639580.uts
And some sort of universal harness for $50. That will keep me from dying. I would rather get some climber's rope (since I might use it again at some point in my life) and diy the harness, but that's like $120 starting.
Maybe I should just stop being a cheap fuck. ;^)
>>901784
Oh - yes on saws and chainsaw. I am not going up there with a chainsaw without proper equipment though. Chainsaw just for final cut once all the branches are off if I do decide to drop it.
>>901767
>Neighbour has a ginourmous tree
>One massive branch overhangs my yard
>Was beginning to hang down over my trampoline
>Time to chainsaw, bitch
>My highest ladder only reaches a lower branch
>Climb with the chain saw to the higher branch
>Sawing the branch I'm sitting on
>Giant overhanging branch goes down
>Nails the ladder and knocks it over, like any retard except me could have predicted
>In tall tree with a chainsaw and no ladder
>Toss chainsaw onto branch to cushion its fall, climb down as far as I can and hop and roll
>Everything went better than expected
Of course, itw as a massive branch that was parrallel to the ground and i could comfortably sit on it.
Pic related look more dangerous indeed, but quit being a giant pussy and climb that tree with a motorized cutting device and no safety cord.
Get an extension ladder, an extension cord, and a reciprocating saw with a long wood blade.
Return everything when you're done.
>>901770
tractor supply? they always got rope.
>>901788
Haha.
It's amazing the emotions you go thru when something retarded happens by your own fault
>>901788
>>901845
OP here - last time I was sitting on a horizontal branch and cut it hit my shin as it fell. Thankfully it hit the bone - had a huge bruise, lesson learned, but they really can snap up in unpredictable ways.
Anyway, what I bought today was a:
1. "Lifeline" - basically rope + carabiner: $35
2. "Roofing harness" - piece of shit harness that has attachment point on back: $50
3. Gloves which I dropped on way up tree:$15.
-------------------
$110ish after taxes
Anyway the "lifeline" was a pain in the ass to attach and re-attach - needed both hands. It had to be switched out any time I hit a fork, which is a lot of times.
Tbh, I got scared a few times - hands started getting tired as I was messing with the damn "lifeline" and holding on to some shady branches. I workout, but this is diff.
Main lesson - every man should be able to know a bunch of basic knots and be able to use rope instead of relying on gimmicks. I am a faggot until I learn these basics.
>>901788
>attacking someone's great big tree because muh trampoline
you deserved death
>>901881
You are using something you paid 35$ for as a lifeline. INCLUDING A CARABINER?
You're a fool.
>>901891
Control your shit and respect your neighbors.
>>901940
if you think trampoline airspace needs justify hacking at someone else's tree you're nobody's neighbor, you're barely even a person.
>>901945
I need to go back up there and cut the branch hanging over my garage, in case it falls on it.
>>901784
>Maybe I should just stop being a cheap fuck. ;^)
YES. yes you should. Stop being an autistic faggot and pay a professional to do it.
You're going to save maybe $100 but at the cost of a couple of days of your time and the risk of a good fuckin chance of putting yourself in the hospital, maybe damaging some structural property with falling pieces.
>Idiot thread #278,456
>>901891
>>901945
If you think people should have to put up with your shit coming over their fences, you need to stop being such a selfish cunt and manage your property better.
>>901767
>cost effective
Not if you don't want to kill yourself. That flip line (pic) has a steel core so chainsaw won't accidentally cut through it. Lots of stuff h/w stores sell is specifically not approved to support a person's weight. Buy stuff intended for logging/arborist use.
>>901767
If it were me and I only had cheap and "safe" as my guidelines, I'd measure the tree, and rent either a 40' or 60' extension ladder. I know 40s are like 40 a day, and 60a are like 100.
I'd have someone hold ladder, then I'd tie off at top, then tie ladder off like 3-5 more spots depending on height used and then drive some stakes in ground and tie feet to them. Then just drop a rope and pull chainsaw up. Even if branches hit ladder, it should hold up fine.
Move ladder down and retie when needed. Get ladder back before next day.
>>901974
You have a belaying knot/pulley and a choke around the fly end of the limb you're cutting. And a ground crew lowering the limb so it's not in free fall.
>>901768
Home Depot sells rope you dumb nigga
>>901945
Fuck people like you
>>901767
>I heard if you are a cripple, you can't be a real mothafuckin G.
i think i've heard that old proverb as well
>>902115
I dunno Stephen hawking has been married twice and I'm still over here forvever alone.
>>902135
We'll he's also minted and famous, and you're not.
![imagesizer[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/2Ulp9mQ.jpg "imagesizer[1].jpg")
get some rope and learn to rig a Swiss Seat.
tree climbing spikes or crampons
another length of rope to attach to the waist and go around the tree.
a length of rope for the chain saw
a length of rope to secure your self by the swiss seat to the tree.
hard hat
ear protection
eye proteciton
OP here again. Meh, it's done. Obviously it would have been better with proper tools, but these (listed above) did it.
In retrospect, I would have two ropes to attach the harness to, since I was disconnected as I moved the rope around splits in the tree.
As far as the chainsaw/steel core rope - I didn't use a chainsaw for a variety of reasons except for the main trunk after it was clean.
>>901767
Ok ok, heres the deal, your rope line idea is good. However, before attempting a large job like this, watch fucktons of forestry training videos. You may not understand the risks involved.
Now here are the things that can go wrong.
You drop the chainsaw as you fall, land on the still running chainsaw.
You fall on your head
Your rope breaks your ribs as you fall and hang yourself.
Now actually doing the job isnt that hard, staying in the tree. As long as you have a good hold you should be fine.
How you can fuck up, having little experience with this is if you dont clear all the branches that are woven in to the branch you are trying to cut off. If the branches get stuck and your branch ends up just hanging in mid air waiting to fall because you didnt free it before cutting then you now need to climb down a tree with a 100kg weight suspended over your head.
If the branch is split or rotten it can shoot off a massive shard into your face when it falls.
Make sure there is nothing below the branch for it to pivot on when it does fall so you dont get the end of the branch spinning up and smacking you in the face.
>>902184
Forgive my clear blindness but what's the mechnical limitation this self-bondage tries to achieve? It just seems like harmless rope on skin, which she'll quickly get desensatized to.
>>902168
>>902179
Why aren't you guys using climbing rope and climbing harnesses?
Get a branch stuck? No bother: just rig a descending rope in addition to your protection rope, and drop down and get it.
Fall? That's what it's designed for. Ain't no-one breaking nothin', so long as no-one hits the ground.
>>902200
It's just supposed to feel kinky while you go around town
>>902201
Op refused to buy any proper equipment.
Several hArnesses were suggested.
>>902135
>>902146
He hooked up with the first girl he married while he was still an athlete and at an Ivy League School. If I remember correctly, she already knew he was going to be cripple mode when they got married though.
>>902168
Thanks, I need to learn to make that.
>>902179
I only cut branches that I am above, with few exceptions where I take special precautions. I recommend everyone do that. Branch can hit you pretty hard if it swings unpredictably.
P.S. I would have undercut every branch if I wasn't a lazy fuck. I didn't use a chainsaw, because muh powertools in a precarious situation. Did hang the saw from a rope though, can't see a way around that.
>>902201
lol I would love to have a climbing set up with a belay device and just hop up and down the tree, but you kind of have to secure the rope on top at first.
>>902207
Heh, I did listen to you guys and considered it.
>>902200
1) it's hemp rope, which feels way different
2) you might not have spotted, but it's wedged in her cooter
3) the karada tie is a starting-point, to which you can add your own variations. The individual segments, due to all the cinching, don't move about, so anything attached to them stays where it's put. With thinner ropes you can cinch any bit you reckon needs cinched more. With the right rigging, a karada can even be used to do a full suspension.
>>902226
...and then they divorced and he married someone else.
I guess he was a celebrity by then though.
Alright m8 I'm currently doing the same thing. I've got a tree over 2 stories high I've been taking down. It's a danger to the house/other peoples property and had carpenter ants in it so it had to go. Had some help from my wife, dad, and inlaws taking down the branches with leaves on them. As you can see it's huge. We took down ALL of the branches using an electric pole saw from harbor freight that my dad brought. I don't really buy into that electric crap but holy shit that dog will hunt. The only time we used a gas chainsaw was on the ground to cut up the branches to carry-able sizes to load on the trailer. Many hands make light work.
>>902388
To be fair my dad works at a power plant and brought this so I had access to this type of harness for the day, except it had two clamps I could wrap around branches. I used it a few times for support climbing and whatnot but for the most part it was just there to ease my mind.
>>902389
We ended up taking 6 loads to the brush dump, about $40 total. My dad is awesome and I really appreciated the help.
>>902390
Here's what the tree looks like after all the leaf branches were taken down. I have to do all of this on my own now. Wife was a big help too.
>>902391
I sawed one brach down by hand and said fuck it that's gonna take forever. I picked up a coupon and bought a harbor freight electric chain saw for about $40. I don't really buy into that electric stuff but living in the city I don't really have use for a gas chain saw so I didn't want to spend $150 on something I'd never use again. Plus, I figure if I can get though this one tree before it craps out then that's $40 well spent. That said, holy fuck this thing has been awesome. I've taken down all of this over the weekend just using the 14" electric chainsaw and I've only had to stop once to sharpen it. Granted I still have a ways to go but so far I'm impressed. Gonna chop off the tree arms next, then try to drop the whole remaining thing at once. Hopefully it will fall forward and not backwards on the fence, I gotta look up how to do that. Once everything's on the ground I'll chop it into smaller pieces. Probably gonna rent a log splitter from Home Depot and break it down even smaller.
>>902398
Here's everything I've used so far, you probably already have some of this stuff. I picked up a wedge today and used my sledgehammer to drive it into a cut to encourage a branch to fall a certain way. It was pretty straight up and I couldn't tell which way it would fall so that helped. You can always tell when the gap you are sawing starts to separate a little, so you know to stop and put the extension cord and everything aside before you push the branch by hand to fall. Also be mindful of your ladder because I've had two branches hit mine and bend it to shit. I was so worried about the fence I failed to realize the ladder was right in the path of the fall. It's aluminum so I was able to bend it back but still. I used a rope and clamp to loop around the branch I was cutting quickly (and untie quickly) and looped off to another branch so when it came down it would swing and not hit the fence. Loop it a few times around a branch and you can ease it down like a pulley. Wear gloves because one took off and gave me a rope burn from falling so fast. Eyeglasses keep the sawdust out of your eyes so you can see what you're doing. You're gonna need a chainsaw sharpener no way around it. I got an electric one from harbor freight, about $30 with a coupon. Good luck, keep us posted.
btw anyone need some firewood?
>>901770
Have you tried Ace? They carry rope fo' sho
>rope
Home Depot, Lowes, Harbor Freight, Wal-freaking-mart, McCoys, jesus the list goes on and on. Tons of place sell rope ya dingus. Harbor Freight sells 100 foot of rope rated for 600 lbs for less than $10. I can't tell if you guys are joking or not...
>>901770
>Home Depot doesn't carry rope.
Yes they do, it's by the chains section. Close to the gloves, fence hardware, safety glasses, etc. section. You must have overlooked it.
>>902398
Make sure to remember to fill up the chain oil, it's really easy to forget on the electrical ones.
>>902400
I'd buy a new ladder if I were you, aluminium has no strength once it's stretched and lost its structural strength
>>902428
Yep keeping the tank full, don't want to have to buy a new chain anytime soon.
Thinking of doing this to get rid of the stump...
>>902486
It's a small crack and the ladder is still usable. I picked up some aluminum brazing rods and with that + flux it's supposed to yield a strong bond. It'll work trust me. It's just a safety thing to keep the crack from spreading.
http://www.homedepot.com/p/Bernzomatic-AL3-Aluminum-Brazing-and-Welding-Rods-334491/203710179
>>902598
Fair enough, up to you man
>>902598
Make sure you drill a stop hole at the end of the crack before you weld it back up to stop the crack propagating and to ease the tension in the metal caused by the split.
>>902623
>>902662
Sooo fuck that shit it didn't work. Maybe a different kind of aluminum idk. I wire brushed the spots, applied flux, applied the aluminum rod but it would stay stuck. I dripped a drop into the crack and slowly dripped drops to get it in, then kind of pushed it in. But in the end I was able to flake it off, like when you drip solder on concrete and you can just scrape it up. Fuck it, jobs done so whatever.
>>902398
I chopped off the remaining branches today and prepped the tree to fall.
>>902768
Thanks to advances in modern science and our 4k high def slow motion camera we're able to bring you this never before seen footage of the tree actually falling.
>>902774
Now to burn that stump and chop the rest into into firewood...
>>902767
Brazing aluminium wont work, you only end up passivating the surface layer then you are trying to braze to aluminium oxide (a ceramic). And not to mention the heat will ruin the specific aluminium alloy. What you need is a tig welder, basic arc welders can be modified to do tig and it will work "ok" for this purpose.
For crack drilling, the crack will go further then what you can see (crack penetration fluid will help) or go a little further then drill the hole.
The bigger problem is you have a aluminium ladder with (most probably) a fatigue crack, you need to investigate why there is a fatigue crack and address it.
And throw the ladder away, cracking on aluminium insist an isolated problem and fixing it only suppresses the problem, if money is tight use a double up plate where appropriate with spaced plug welds.
