>>16627002
Go out. Fuck up. Consider suicide. Decide against suicide. Learn how you fucked put. Repeat the previous steps until it works.

>>16627002
girls like this should keep you going lol.

it's really about you anon.
if you're at rock bottom you can only go up right? so just fuck around. shower and go out tonight. there's tons of clubs and parties and shit.

IF you asberger the shit out of yourself and it's some horrible night, it's still better than sitting at home on the fucking computer

>>16627002
Nigger, just go out to a bar and have a beer. You might not successfully talk to any chicks but at least you made the effort to go out. What's the worst thing that could happen?

>>16627055
>>16627063
actually potentially getting beat up and robbed by chad and his friends who took your girl, spending night sleeping naked on cold street, is not better than sleeping in warm bed in the safety of your house. either way you'll be the laughing stock for the people at the bar.

Well the simple question is are you happy with your life? If yes then don't worry about it. If not, then you have to ask if the potential embarrassment of learning how to socialize/get rejected is worse then how you feel now.

>>16627002

If you're anything like me, you'd probably hate going to a bar.

For happiness, do this
http://www. nerdfitness.com/

for productivity and life-optimisation, read some of these:
http://waitbutwhy .com/

Also this:
https://www .headspace.com/

Once happy and in control of daily routine, good things will follow.

Find a group that centres around one of your interests, meet some online peeps and chat or play games together then pick a time to meet up

I was like you and then I started traveling by myself. It made me so much more social.

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>>16627049
>>16627055
>>16627063
i don't know about going out alone tonight.
every place is charging $25+ for admission it seems (including bars), and I think this anon is right
>>16627085
people do get beat up when going out, and i am afraid i'll be the laughing stock for the people at the bar.

>>16627099
not happy. i don't know how to learn to socialize. don't know where to start, i could try bars, but would rather not go out alone tonight

>>16627132
thanks for the links, i do want to get into the habit of meditating more

>>16627139
i don't have many interests, been rock climbing recently, that's it. i don't know any online peeps

>>16627174
i want to travel more, but i won't get a chance for 6+ months. and i'm worried i still won't be social
i've gone recently to another city on a business trip, i didn't do anything social. i went to a bar, but everyone was already in groups at tables, and the people at the bar were already talking to each other... had a couple of drinks and left

>>16627194
Try to pick destinations that are known for their lax partying atmosphere. Even if you don't enjoy it it will teach you to be more social.

>>16627063
some nigger will literally kill you

>>16627306
This.

Conceal carry just in case and never leave your drink unattended, or take your eyes off your drink for too long.

>29 year old virgin
One more year and you will become a wizard

>>16627219
i will try, maybe i should stay in hostels too, instead of hotels (which I did for my last business trip)

>>16627541
well memed my man

>>16627541
im a "wizard", literally nothing special.

>>16627139
How do I find some kind of anime meetup thingy in my area? There's none on meetup.com

>>16628185
this

>>16628260
you might need to travel if you don't live in a big city, or create your own meetup

if you're in school or there are schools nearby maybe you can join them.

>>16627063
I don't like to sacrifice my health for something that is very unlikely to succeed.

>>16627063
Because these aspies just want to SAY they want to meet girls. They don't actually want to though.

>>16629979
>>16629979
or maybe they are too aspie to go out to a bar

if someone is afraid of spiders, you don't ask them to hold some poisonous, lethal spiders

>>16627002
stop doing everything fun and get a job doing something that only aspies find tolerable like computer science or engineering

>>16627002
LISTEN, THIS IS WHAT YOU GOT TO DO!!!
Follow my advice, and you will change your life. It will be hard, but not impossible.

You are 29 years old, and a kissless virgin. That means that girls is the least of your issues. You are struggeling with serious anxiety and depression, and probably spend all your energy and time inside of your own head. If you tell me you don't have anxiety and depression issues, that means you have no self insight either.

Man "go out and have a beer" is SHIT advice. IT WONT WORK. Not when you are as fucked up as you are. There are just too many underlying issues, too much mental leverage is needed.

Now, I will tell you how you can change. First of all, realize that it will take a long time. With consistent action, a year can make an enourmous difference, but a year is still a long time. So, rule 1: Calm the fuck down, just make a little improvement every day, and have faith in the journey. Stop giving a fuck about others, truly. Stress will make things a lot worse and make you irrational.
2. Start thinking long term. Get as much sleep as possible, stop any drugs (including nicotine and caffeine), try to get some exercise and vitamins.
3. Start reading self help litturature all the time. Doesn't matter if you apply what you learn or not. Just that fact that you are reading stuff like "never give up" instead of the usual dark shit you read will make you ALOT more positive.
4. Start meditate, going for walks, read about mindfulness, listening to music etc. Anything that will clear you head. You are in for a long hard road, it will never work unless you remain relaxed.

Follow my advice, and within a month you will be a new man. Keep in mind though, the first month will be EXTREMELY hard. You brain will lie, trick you, and fuck with you in every imaginable way. Anything to get you away will help. Just sit in the fucking woods all day. It might seem pointless right now, but just getting away from the computer makes a difference

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>>16630561
i don't know if i want to go back to school.. but i am learning to program again

>>16630637
thanks for the advice. i will do all of that.
i should think in the long-term too, instead of worrying that i'm not progressing quick enough

>>16627002

>what do i do to change /adv/?

Don't mind me, just promoting my thread (since you somehow seem to be unable to find it): >>16629830

>>16629806
there's literally nothing wrong with drinking in moderation

>>16627002

Bumping because I'm someone in the same exact situation, age and all. Honestly I feel like it's too late for me...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5lqo86IvOJ0
here you go friend
he changed my life

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>>16631079
will check it out

i've seen his video before, don't remember if i've seen that one

>>16627085
AT least it gives you something to fucking TALK ABOUT. Bad shit happening can be good for you in other ways, either by helping you grow or just giving you a potentially good story. My gf is a nurse. Met her in the emrgency room while I was bleeding profusely from my head after getting glassed in a case of mistaken identity (dude thought I was the guy who felt up his girl). Got glassed, but also met gf.

>>16627085

Is this really what it's like going out? no wonder why I stay inside.

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>>16627085
>ahh, a rare /r9k/ post, spotted well outside of its natural containment board.

>>16633814
>>16627085
>>16627306
>>16629806

Here's a tip, stop living in Detroit.

>>16633571
but don't you realize that it could have been much worse. a random guy who you didn't know attacked you for no reason. what if he had a weapon? or you hit your head?

>>16634366
Never fucking reply to me again unless you're contributing to the thread.

>>16635381
why the fuck do you keep posting this?

>>16635440
pictures? to bump the thread

>>16635381
I hopethis is photoshoed
Bbbr

>>16636048
Why?

>>16627194
It's like going to the gym, you THINK people are judging you, but they aren't.
I'll tell you what may happen, tho: you get inside, sit on the bar, ask for a beer, hang out an hour, someone may initiate smalltalk with you, you're going to respond. You can literally say "this is new for me because I'm trying to be more social" and it will be ok, s/he's not going to judge you, or if s/he does, it'll be a positive judgement, because you're trying to improve yourself.

>>16636051
Because I wish a grill with a similar ass would sit on my face and I know I'm never going to find one.

>>16631079

This shit is just basic conversation skills, except with a creepy PUA attitude....

Learn from this video but drop the PUA shit, unless you want to end up depressed because you think every girl is just a target to manipulate.

>>16636339
so i should go to a bar, order a drink and stare at my phone for an hour, and hope someone comes up to me and initiates smalltalk?

i've been to a bar by myself once, no one talked to me except for the server

>>16628137
wizard here.
but im male.
Im not into partying.

I go travel alone for adventure in nature n culture. stay in hostels, and listen to/share stories w/ other travelers.
Meeting other ppl does not mean need to go to the bar. Hostel lounge area and some potato chips would do the trick.

if i dont travel, i get some mini project to keep me occupied over weekends (ie fixing broken stuff etc)

>>16630637
this anon give good points

>>16636339
Never say never

>>16627002
>everyone else is enjoying life
>traveling, partying, having friends to hang out with, having relationships with others
Who is this "everyone else"? I think I got left out of that. I have relationships with others but I sure as hell am not traveling or partying on my income. Nor am I hanging out with friends much, though that's mostly by choice. But my point is that no, "everybody" is not having a great time all the time and leaving you in the dust.
>>16636339
>I know I'm never going to find one.
If I see one more of these fucking future-predicting statements, I'm going to kidnap you and lock you in my basement and make you give me winning lottery numbers. If you sincerely think you can prophesy with that kind of accuracy, start your own church. You'll meet all kinds of people.

You probably will never have a traditional family so fuck normal definitions of success. Dedicate your life to a series of novels, create the world's largest comic collection, fuck it all.

>>16627002
Hey man, I was the same way. Still kind of am.

Forcing yourself into bars and clubs will not make you happy. It will be an hour or two of agonizing torture where you check the time every 5 minutes and sit around

Girls won't make you happy either, or at least the kind you find at bars and clubs will not. I've tried to tangle with a few, they're very shallow and literally have no care for other people's feelings

I've dealt with this crushing lonlyness by chasing my dreams, and am kind of hoping I'll meet some nice girls along the way.

>>16637124

Keep hoping faggot.

You have to go get what you want, shit doesn't just fall into your lap.

Even while chasing your dreams, if a girl comes up and talks to you you're going to piss your pants.

>>16637058
>Who is this "everyone else"?
"normies", like most of my coworkers
all of their evenings/weekends are spent doing something with friends. going to a bar/club, house party, playing board games, going to a wedding, etc. they also travel throughout the year

everyone else is doing something it seems

The ammount of effort I put to be able to just browse the tubes/play video games everynight is impresionant, then again I am not a kissless virgin, I just find the social interaction required to have sex to be annoying (despite actually enjoying sex and, to be honest, lately I've really been thinking about getting into a relationship just for the sex).

Most people are assholes, the hardest part of finding social interaction is to find someone who's worth your time, but if you really want to just go outside, is not that bad.

Also, get a fucking job.

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Give it up in december i hit 23 and just going to quit this shit this year

>>16637079

>You probably will never have a traditional family

Why is that? Is it too late?

Not going to read through everything. What have you already done to better your situation?

>>16638974
read how to win friends and influence people in the past few days

trying to find hobbies, lifting again and plan on doing rock climbing

>>16629979
Yes, generalizing is always correct.

>>16638537
Hey I also turned 23 in December. I started going to the gym. Still not happy. But, little steps.

>>16631060
I'm 19 and feel like it's too late for me. I turn 20 in June, never kissed or dated a girl, yet have texted several and even hung out with a few. I'm out of weed which is shitty and I won't have any untill tommorrow when my friend can pick me up and we can drive to his dealer. My second youngest 17 year old sister is cuddling with her boyfriend and it makes me want to stick a gun in my mouth because I can't have that. Any girl I talk to we text for a while, maybe hang out once or twice, and then they never talk to me ever again. I want to die. What should I do to survive today and get out of this mode of thinking?

all this advice going out to clubs seems like the next distraction waiting. (before it was the screen, then it is alcohol)

my solution for you: get a dog.

>>16639130
is a dog not a distraction?

>>16639120
>>16631060
Everyone says it's too late for them regardless of age. It's a mental state more than anything.

>>16639120
Maybe you should consider quitting the weed for a while? Call it a tolerance break if it makes you feel any better about your addiction.

>>16639002
Getting into hobbies is great (and an important step towards better quality of life) but it's not going to directly yield the results you want. Why are you not actively dating? Think really hard before you answer. Yes, certain things in life come easier to some than others (trust me, I know) but I'm betting you've never actively tried to attain the things you want in life or at least not recently.

Im 28 and like OP.
I've tried going out many times, but i just feel out of place.

I end up sitting in a bar somwhere looking down on my phone. Sometimes when i've been out with friends, i've danced, and once a girl stared dancing with me before she got pulled away by her friend.

But i haven't done it since.

In general, being there in those places, with people having fun and gils making out with jocks everywhere, i just makes me jealous and insecure.

Then i when i go home, i usually get a rage and throw bottles and destroy things, because im drunk and totally hate this world. Haha.

After this had happened a few times, i decided to stop drinking and stay home.

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>>16627002
Work out. Bodyweight reps at home in private. Jog daily if overweight.

Dark Souls 2 had one of the best lines of dialogue I've ever heard, OP. I was in the same boat as you, but this one line resonated with me:
"For now, seek strength. The rest will follow."

If you're depressed, unmotivated and completely out of energy, just do that. And the rest will follow. I triple tip top guarantee you this, OP. EVERYTHING will fall into place. Just seek strength. Physically, mentally, every way you can.

>>16639158
Usually you distract yourself from something. Say you distract yourself from some important goals (because they are/seem unattainable). Say making friends is one of those goals.

A dog is your best friend. It loves you unconditionally. It gives colour to your otherwise boring days. A DOG IS NOT THE DISTRACTION. A DOG IS THE SOLUTION.

>>16639130
That's your solution? A fucking dog?

>>16639558

not that person but dogs can be conversation starters I've found

>>16639167
>Why are you not actively dating?
i don't meet many girls to ask out. don't think i'd do well in online dating, i'm not the most attractive guy tbqh

>>16640323

do you go out a lot?

>>16640829
just to and from work. where would i go?
i don't have friends, so i don't go to any bars/clubs or anything. can't meet friends of friends who might be grills, etc.

>>16640323
> i'm not the most attractive guy tbqh
Ugly people have ugly sex, get married and have ugly offspring every single day. Come back when you've been on at least five dates. I'm not wasting any more time on this. Also, don't buy a fucking dog.

>>16627503
go to bed junior... school starts again on Monday.
Most places do not allow CC where alcohol is served. Because of dumbshits, like you.

>>16640323
Buy a dog. Lift. Eat healthier. Learn a language. Pick an active hobby. Go out by yourself once in a while. Read in a coffee shop. Go to the dog park. Take classes at a university if you don't have a degree. Spend time with your family. Learn a skill like cooking.

You gotta strive for greatness, man. You can do it, literally nothing is stopping you. But if you don't respect yourself, no one will respect you. It sounds corner, but women eat up self-esteem, and friends need people who will benefit their life in some way rather than sit around and complain.

You just gotta put yourself out there and find people who like doing what you do. Maybe a hiking club, for example.

I'm in a similar position I guess?

>25
>BS in Computer Science
>Work full time as a software engineer
>Have a mortgage and a home
>...just go home every night, browse 4chan, play videogames by myself, and wonder where it all went wrong

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>>16641412
thanks for the advice

>>16641604
yeah, similar. except you might have a better paying job

I'm the same age and situation. But I don't have any special talents or abilities that could lead to a high paid job, so I have been working the same minimum wage job since high school. I envy people who are good at programming or something that can rake in a ton of dough. I suck at everything, even my minimum wage job.

Why is our generation full of pussies...?

>>16642214
Because no one is taught when it's time to lose.