I've had a pretty crazy life. I've had my ups and my downs but i'm going to be focusing on the cons just for the sake of /X/
Approx. 3 years ago in my sophomore year of high school me and my best friend were playing chicken on some train tracks... long story short we both got hit by the train , he died , I lived.
For a while I was traumatized but eventually I got over it. Ive been doing pretty well , making music distracts me from all the bullshit in life.
About a month ago I was walking home from work and I start to hear thunder (earlier that same day the news said there was going to be a huge storm )
In the mist of walking i'm having thoughts of somebody getting hit by lightning, when out of nowhere a giant bolt of lightning strikes right in front of me .
At this point Im freaking the fuck out so I just run all the way home praying I don't get hit .
In my head i'm always so anxious of every little thing , always thinking of scenarios like from final destination.
Afraid that my thoughts will become real.
I feel like god is giving me an ultimatum and I haven't been listening ....
The Lonely Hearts and Emo board is >>>/adv/
God made you play chicken infront of train tracks? You walked outside during a lightning storm?
This sounds like poor decision making skills.
God doesn't exist. Don't blame a deity for bad timing.
>>17150739
I agree
>just coincidence
>>17150790
Or synchronicity ?
>>17150728
I think God, the universe, or just dumb luck let you survive. You've done very stupid things, yet you're still here. You were given fair warnings, and clear signals ahead of time. Grace, luck, or whatever won't save you every time. Everyone knows you don't fuck around on train tracks. Everyone knows you don't walk around outside in thunder storms. Stop being an idiot and taking your life for granted, then accusing the universe of plotting against you.
sounds like god wants you alive and other forces want you dead
If God wanted you dead you'd be dead. Sounds like God or some kond of Guardian has actually saved your life
>>17150728
>I feel like god is giving me an ultimatum and I haven't been listening ....
God, or whoever, gave you two chances not to fuck up, and the third one may be your last. Quit doing stupid shit and you might live past your seventies, playing chicken with a train and walking in a thunderstorm when you knew there would be one that day is foolish.
>>17150728
A) If there is a god, and he wanted you dead, you'd be dead.
B) Prolonged anxiety, paranoia and fear are all symptoms of a nervous breakdown. They might be caused by PTSD, drugs, underlying spychosis, and a few other things.
Stop taking any stimulants you might be taking, (including caffeine) and go find someone to share your inner feelings with. I'd recommend paid therapist, as they can't break confidentiality unless you express a desire to harm yourself or others.
I don't have a degree in psychology, but it sounds like you have a serious case of PTSD and survivors guilt. You eventually learn to feel "normal" again after the trauma, but the anxiety is often still there, even if you are used to it.
Good luck, and try not worry about supernatural forces too much. If they want you dead, there's not much you can do, unless you let them in.
>>17150728
> Survived train.
> Survived lightning
> "Omg god hates me and wants me kill!"
Stop being an emo fag.
>>17150985
This desu. God gets what he wants.
Damn, I am feeling the same! I mean, EVERY YEAR i get to a near death experience like 4-5 times. And i always get like little accidents like every other month. My friends have all agreed that someone/something wants me dead.
Only Satan wants to destroy man. Seek Christ.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ghJYCdhVix0
>>17150728
god is not trying to kill you.
op, I feel a connection with you. let's make music together...fuck god, we're going to meet him sooner or later, so give me a form of contact, and lets crawl into the minds of his followers with our notes and words...
don't normally do this, but I have gone through similar things (imo my shits way more fucked) but I want to hear what you produce musically.
>>17150728
Gonna go ahead and assume that if the author of all creation seriously wanted you dead that you would have been turned into a cloud of space dust long ago
>>17150728
Normally I'm the first to denounce Yahweh, but it sounds to me that he has far less to do with your poor luck than your decision making skills.
>>17150735
I wish /r9k/ and /pol/ hadn't invaded /adv/. It used to be so much better.
>>17150728
>stories about times you easily could have died but luckily survived
>god wants me dead
I feel like your attitude towards surviving is pretty shitty.
embrace destiny anon. If its your time its your time. You are part of a story, if a God wants you dead you will be.
>>17150728
>i've survived a bunch of dangerous stuff
>therefore an omnipotent being must have been trying to kill me over and over again, and yet failed
>>17152071
https://soundcloud.com/playerwild0/bleed-pearlwhitecvrl-ft-plaugexmobb-x-kidjay
[email protected]
>>17154226
see a priest this is there thing
tldr fix is : say your sorry, pray for her to save you from things and men that would harm you, and ask for a way to go forward with life
if its ayys just say aww man i never kill stuff, i wanna be good, and never go look for the ayyys...
>>17150728
God doesn't want you dead. You're just an idiot.
>>17150728
Like just about everybody here has said, if God wanted you dead you would be.
You made continuously stupid decisions with ample warning and still survived. And rather than realizing you are taking life and survival for granted you try to blame it on the very thing that kept you alive.
>>17150728
If something or someone wanted you dead then you'd be dead. Seems more like you have an affinity for narrowly avoiding death.
>>17150728
>I think god wants me dead
If God wanted you dead then you would be dead.
>>17150985
This. God will take you when it's your time.
Unless your own stupidity kills you first..
Too bad God didn't kill you.
Sounds like this thread is boring.
0/skinwalkers
>>17156953
I like your grading system... I will grade this thread 52/testicle hair.
>>17150728
you dumb as fuck, thread dumb as fuck. just slit wrist already, you draining my taxes. Autistic bitch.
