Bible quotes
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You are currently reading a thread in /x/ - Paranormal
You are currently reading a thread in /x/ - Paranormal
Can you guys post some fun/interesting bible quotes?
No.
Balaam answered the donkey, "You have made a fool of me! If I had a sword in my hand, I would kill you right now." The donkey said to Balaam, "Am I not your own donkey, which you have always ridden, to this day? Have I been in the habit of doing this to you?" "No," he said.
Numbers 22:29-30
No one whose testicles are crushed or whose penis is cut off shall be admitted to the assembly of the LORD.
Deut. 23:1
Proverbs 30:14
those whose teeth are swords and whose jaws are set with knives to devour the poor from the earth, the needy from among mankind.
Job 40
15 Look at Behemoth,
which I made along with you
and which feeds on grass like an ox.
16 What strength it has in its loins,
what power in the muscles of its belly!
17 Its tail sways like a cedar;
the sinews of its thighs are close-knit.
18 Its bones are tubes of bronze,
its limbs like rods of iron.
19 It ranks first among the works of God,
yet its Maker can approach it with his sword.
Job 41 goes on and on about some kind of aquatic dinosaur that breathes fire
>>16947425
Jeremiah 10 1:5 forbids cutting down trees and decorating them due to celestial events. Like the winter solstice which historically was on December 25th.
Now this isn't forbidding Christmas trees themselves since that holiday and practice weren't around in the time and place when this was written, its probably talking about Ashera Poles, but I can't imagine that the author of those verses would have looked on them very favorably.
>>16947425
And I declared that the dead, who had already died, are happier than the living, who are still alive.
But better than both is the one who has never been born, who has not seen the evil that is done under the sun.
Ecclesiastes 4-2/3
John 15:18-21
“If the world hates you, you know that it hated Me before it hated you. If you were of the world, the world would love its own. Yet because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you. Remember the word that I said to you... If they persecuted Me, they will also persecute you... because they do not know Him who sent Me."
One of my favorites.
Psalm 82King James Version (KJV)
82
yahweh standeth in the congregation of the mighty; he judgeth among the gods.
2 How long will ye judge unjustly, and accept the persons of the wicked? Selah.
3 Defend the poor and fatherless: do justice to the afflicted and needy.
4 Deliver the poor and needy: rid them out of the hand of the wicked.
5 They know not, neither will they understand; they walk on in darkness: all the foundations of the earth are out of course.
6 I have said, Ye are gods; and all of you are children of the most High.
7 But ye shall die like men, and fall like one of the princes.
8 Arise, O Yahweh, judge the earth: for thou shalt inherit all nations.
This is Yahweh laying judgement on the fallen angels that currently control the Earth
>>16947425
If there be among you any man, that is not clean by reason of uncleanness that chanceth him by night, then shall he go abroad out of the camp, he shall not come within the camp:
Deuteronomy 23:10
>>16947523
Actually it sounds like an enthronement psalm that would be used in the temple in rituals declaring Yahweh to be the king of the gods.
Keep in mind that monotheism was a fairly late development and that the guys who attempted to enforce monotheism didn't always do a good job of editing the earlier polytheism out.
That is Good
Austin 3
16 - I just whooped your ass
>>16947641
LOL I think they mean STD's.
27 Daniel replied, “No wise man, enchanter, magician or diviner can explain to the king the mystery he has asked about, 28 but there is a God in heaven who reveals mysteries. He has shown King Nebuchadnezzar what will happen in days to come. Your dream and the visions that passed through your mind as you were lying in bed are these:
>>16947425
Ezekiel 23:20: For she doted upon their paramours, whose flesh is as the flesh of asses, and whose issue is like the issue of horses.
>>16947425
It's just a weather balloon or a drone. Go make yourself a tinfoil hat.
>>16947425
2 Kings 2:24 something about Glob murdering two dozen kids because they insulted Elisha. Pretty funny stuff.
>>16947425
Tyler Durden:
the first rule of fight club is, you will not talk about fight club.
>>16947425
OP, what this thread needs some mother fuckin' Bible spells up in it.
You're welcome.
"Suppose you hear in one of the towns the LORD your God is giving you that some worthless rabble among you have led their fellow citizens astray by encouraging them to worship foreign gods. In such cases, you must examine the facts carefully. If you find it is true and can prove that such a detestable act has occurred among you, you must attack that town and completely destroy all its inhabitants, as well as all the livestock. Then you must pile all the plunder in the middle of the street and burn it. Put the entire town to the torch as a burnt offering to the LORD your God. That town must remain a ruin forever; it may never be rebuilt. Keep none of the plunder that has been set apart for destruction. Then the LORD will turn from his fierce anger and be merciful to you. He will have compassion on you and make you a great nation, just as he solemnly promised your ancestors. "The LORD your God will be merciful only if you obey him and keep all the commands I am giving you today, doing what is pleasing to him." (Deuteronomy 13:13-19 NLT)
Kill an entire town if there is a single non-believer living there. God sure is good, just, and fair, isn't he guiz?!
>sarcasm alert
>>16949687
>pic related
>no sarcasm
>>16949687
There is no evil in death, satan.
Psalm 2:1 Why do the nations rage and the peoples plot in vain? 2 The kings of the earth set themselves, and the rulers take counsel together, against the Lord and against his Anointed, saying, 3 "Let us break their bonds asunder and cast away their cords from us."
Ephesians 6:12 For we struggle not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers who govern the darkness of this world and against the spiritual hosts of wickedness in high places.
Galatians 6:7 Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.
Psalm 33:10 The LORD bringeth the counsel of the heathen to nought: he maketh the devices of the people of none effect.
Luke 8:17 For nothing is hidden which will not become evident, nor anything hidden which shall not be made known and come to light.
1 Peter 5:8 Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour:
Ephesians 5:11 And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove them.
Matthew 16:26 For what shall it profit a man though he should win the whole world, if he lose his own soul? or what shall a man give for recompense of his soul?
James 4:7 Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you.
Psalm 64:1 Hear my voice, O God, in my prayer: preserve my life from fear of the enemy. 2 Hide me from the conspiracy of the wicked, and from the rage of the works of iniquity. 3 Which have whet their tongue like a sword, and shot for their arrows bitter words: 4 To shoot at the upright in secret: they shoot at him suddenly and fear not. 5 They encourage themselves in a wicked purpose: they commune together to lay snares privily, and say, Who shall see them? 6 They have sought out iniquities, and have accomplished that which they sought out, even everyone his secret thoughts, and the depth of his heart. 7 But God will shoot an arrow at them suddenly: their strokes shall be at once. 8 They shall cause their own tongue to fall upon them: and whosoever shall see them, shall flee away. 9 And all men shall see it, and declare the work of God, and they shall understand, what he hath wrought. 10 But the righteous shall be glad in the Lord, and trust in him: and all that are upright of heart, shall rejoice.
Psalm 56:3-4 When I am afraid, I will trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I will not be afraid. What can mortal man do to me?
Hebrews 9:27 And as it is appointed unto men that they shall once die, and after that cometh the judgment:
Isaiah 5:20 Woe unto them that speak good of evil, and evil of good, which put darkness for light, and light for darkness, that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for sour. 21 Woe unto them that are wise in their own eyes, and prudent in their own sight.
Luke 6:26 Woe to you when all men speak well of you! for so did their fathers to the false prophets.
John 4:8
He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love.
>>16949687
Jeremiah 8:8 How do you say: We are wise, and the law of the Torah is with us? Behold, certainly the lying pen of the scribes hath made it falsehood.
>>16947523
>>16947930
Sounds more to me like Yahweh is only the god of this Earth, and the judge among the pantheon of the deities. He may be the one above all, or yet another may be beyond Yahweh. It isn't really specific.
"Yahweh shall inherit all nations", but not specifically the Earth or its people.. Also reminiscent of the Gnostic demiurge. The nations, their governments, belong to it. But there is something greater still.
Just food for thought.
>>16947425
Yes OP, yes I can.
Mark 12:28 And one of the scribes came, and having heard them reasoning together, and perceiving that he had answered them well, asked him, Which is the first commandment of all? 29And Jesus answered him, The first of all the commandments is, Hear, O Israel; The Lord our God is one Lord: 30And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength: this is the first commandment. 31And the second is like, namely this, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these.
Matthew 19:16 And, behold, one came and said unto him, Good Teacher, what good thing shall I do, that I may have eternal life? 17And he said unto him, Why do you call me good? there is none good but one, that is, God: but if you will enter into life, keep the commandments.
John 7:16 Jesus therefore answered them and said, My teaching is not my own, but of him who sent me. 17 If any man willeth to do his will, He shall know concerning the teaching, whether it be of God, or whether I speak from myself
Matthew 7:21 Not everyone that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven, but he that doeth my Father’s will which is in heaven.
John 5:30 I can of my own self do nothing: as I hear, I judge: and my judgment is just, because I seek not mine own will, but the will of the Father who hath sent me. 31 If I should bear witness of myself, my witness were not true.
John 5:34 But I receive not the record of man: nevertheless these things I say, that ye might be saved.
Acts 2:22 Ye men of Israel, hear these words, JESUS of Nazareth, a man approved of God among you with great works, and wonders, and signs, which God did by him in the midst of you, as ye yourselves also know:
2 Corinthians 11:3 - But I fear, lest by any means, as the serpent beguiled Eve through his subtilty, so your minds should be corrupted from the simplicity that is in Christ.
>>16949711
>implying anyone who disagrees with christianity is automatically an atheist
Nice false dichotomy you got going there, faggot.
>>16949744
>There is no evil in death
Oh, so it's NOT evil to kill people? You're fucking disgusting. Kill yourself.
>>16949782
not sure what you are trying to get at, there.
Here's another favorite bit from the bible:
At that time the Spirit of the LORD came upon Jephthah, and he went throughout the land of Gilead and Manasseh, including Mizpah in Gilead, and led an army against the Ammonites. And Jephthah made a vow to the LORD. He said, "If you give me victory over the Ammonites, I will give to the LORD the first thing coming out of my house to greet me when I return in triumph. I will sacrifice it as a burnt offering. So Jephthah led his army against the Ammonites, and the LORD gave him victory. He thoroughly defeated the Ammonites from Aroer to an area near Minnith and as far away as Abel-keramim. Thus Israel subdued the Ammonites. When Jephthah returned home to Mizpah, his daughter ran out to meet him, playing on a tambourine and dancing for joy. When he saw her, he tore his clothes in anguish. "My daughter!" he cried out. "My heart is breaking! What a tragedy that you came out to greet me. For I have made a vow to the LORD and cannot take it back." And she said, "Father, you have made a promise to the LORD. You must do to me what you have promised, for the LORD has given you a great victory over your enemies, the Ammonites. But first let me go up and roam in the hills and weep with my friends for two months, because I will die a virgin." "You may go," Jephthah said. And he let her go away for two months. She and her friends went into the hills and wept because she would never have children. When she returned home, her father kept his vow, and she died a virgin. So it has become a custom in Israel for young Israelite women to go away for four days each year to lament the fate of Jephthah's daughter." Judges 11:29-40
>>16949826
Ooh that's a good one!
These verses are all interesting: evilbible.com
>>16949856
Jeremiah 11:9 And the LORD said unto me, A conspiracy is found among the men of Judah, and among the inhabitants of Jerusalem.
Ezekiel 21:2 Son of man, set thy face toward Jerusalem, and drop thy word toward the holy places, and prophesy against the land of Israel,
Revelation 3:9 Behold, I will bring of the synagogue of Satan, who say they are Jews, and are not, but do lie. Behold, I will make them to come and adore before thy feet. And they shall know that I have loved thee.
1 Peter 2:6 Wherefore also it is contained in the Scripture; "Behold, I lay in Zion a chief Cornerstone, elect, precious. And he that believeth on him shall not be confounded.
7 Unto you therefore which believe, he is precious; But unto them which be disobedient, the stone which the builders rejected, the same is made the Head of the corner.
>>16949847
thanks, fedora tipper!
>pic related
>it's you
>>16949847
>Oh, so it's NOT evil to kill people? You're fucking disgusting. Kill yourself.
>>16949859
The meaning is pretty clear, I hope the illuminutu pic is just decoration.
>>16949867
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DlucDUgMusI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DHRWnUadAF0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mKEvc8nP73o
>>16949891
John 16:7 Nevertheless I tell you the truth; It is expedient for you that I go away: for if I go not away, the Comforter will not come unto you; but if I depart, I will send him unto you.
8 And when he is come, he will reprove the world of sin, and of righteousness, and of judgment:
9 Of sin, because they believe not on me;
10 Of righteousness, because I go to my Father, and ye see me no more;
11 Of judgment, because the prince of this world is judged.
12 I have yet many things to say unto you, but ye cannot bear them now.
13 Howbeit when he, the Spirit of truth, is come, he will guide you into all truth: for he shall not speak of himself; but whatsoever he shall hear, that shall he speak: and he will shew you things to come.
14 He shall glorify me: for he shall receive of mine, and shall shew it unto you.
John 8:21 Then said Jesus again unto them, I go my way, and ye shall seek me, and shall die in your sins, Whither I go, can ye not come.
22 Then said the Jews, Will he kill himself, because he saith, Whither I go, can ye not come?
23 And he said unto them, Ye are from beneath, I am from above: ye are of this world, I am not of this world.
24 I said therefore unto you, That ye shall die in your sins: for except ye believe, that I am he, ye shall die in your sins.
25 Then said they unto him, Who art thou? And Jesus said unto them, Even the same thing that I said unto you from the beginning.
26 I have many things to say, and to judge of you: but he that sent me, is true, and the things that I have heard of him, those speak I to the world.
27 They understood not that he spake to them of the Father.
28 Then said Jesus unto them, When ye have lifted up the Son of man, then shall ye know that I am he, and that I do nothing of myself, but as my Father hath taught me, so I spake these things.
29 For he that sent me, is with me: the Father hath not left me alone, because I do always those things that please him.
30 As he spake these things, many believed in him.
31 Then said Jesus to the Jews which believed in him, If ye continue in my word, ye are verily my disciples,
32 And shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.
Matthew 6:9 After this manner therefore pray ye: Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name.
10 Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven.
11 Give us this day our daily bread.
12 And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.
13 And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil: For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever. Amen.
>>16949874
Nice rebuttal, you helmet wearing window licker. Keep sucking YHWH's cock.
>>16949878
>I don't understand irony
>>16949687
Self aware thought-form trying to halt the development of a thought-form of similar power. We make our gods, m8s.
>>16949971
Matthew 24:15 When ye therefore shall see the abomination of desolation spoken of by Daniel the Prophet, set in the holy place (let him that readeth consider it.) 16 Then let them which be in Judea, flee into the mountains.
Revelation 12:12 “Therefore, rejoice, O Heavens, and all you who live in the Heavens! But alas for the earth and the sea, for the devil has come down to you in great fury, knowing that his time is short!”
The Lord is My Shepherd
…3He restores my soul; He guides me in the paths of righteousness For His name's sake. 4Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me. 5You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; You have anointed my head with oil; My cup overflows.…
>>16949997
>In Exodus 33 Moses asks God if he can see him 18...I beseech thee, shew me thy glory.
>God replies 20...Thou canst not see my face: for there shall no man see me, and live .
> So God moons Moses: 23 And I will take away mine hand, and thou shalt see my back parts....
>>16950041
Pillars you say?
>>16947425
>06
There is a quote somewhere in the bible where one of the disciples visioned a fighter jet and described it as "a man riding a huge silver bird that breathes fire" if thats a description of a fighter then I'm curious about the other descriptions meanings. That shit is creepy.
>>16947425
>>16948006
Nope, means either pissing the bed or wet dreams.
"The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact." Nigger 30:4
>>16950227
Why is Keanu in a diaper?
>>16950823
Damnit you beat me to it.
Psalm 21:19
Made me chuckle. Genuine advice.
>>16949847
>not sure what you are trying to get at, there.
Seems very obvious even to the casual observer
Romans 16:20
The God of Peace will soon crush Satan under your feet.
The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you.
But Rabshakeh said, Hath my master sent me to thy master and to thee to speak these words? hath he not sent me to the men that sit upon the wall, that they may eat their own dung, and drink their own piss with you?
Isaiah 36:12 KJV only (modern translations use "urine" instead of piss)
Jesus wept.
>>16949752
yeaaaaaaaaaah! dis muh shit bruh
Have this kek
Jesus on regards to alcohol/drugs
"What goes into the mouth and into the body is not nearly as significant as what comes out of the mouth and out of the body."
>>16949887
more jew bashing bible quotes please
" _ B u t - g o - y o u r - w a y - t i l l - t h e - e n d _ A n d - y o u - s h a l l - r e s t. a n d - s h a l l - s t a n d - i n - y o u r - a l l o t t e d - p l a c e - a t - t h e - e n d - o f - t h e - d a y s _ " D a n i e l _ ( - 1 2 - : - 1 3 - )
>>16949221
Donkey dicks and horse cum
>>16947523
>Jeremiah 10 1:5
>yahweh
>KJV
I don't think so, tim.
>>16949795
"nations" translates "goyim". It's saying YHWH will inherit the people of all races. Nation meaning government is fairly new as a meaning.
>>16952829
>Jesus on regards to alcohol/drugs
bullshit. context is misplaced. It's about eating with dirty hands among sinners.
>>16947425
Mathew 21:17
And leaving them, he went out of the city to Bethany and lodged there.
think about it
>>16952979
Correct, the makers of the KJV were more interested in honoring King James than Yahweh. They avoided the tetragrammaton like it actually stung them like a poison.
Their ways are best seen in peter 2 1:20-21, and alas that poison has taken deep root in the mind of fundies everywhere.
>>16949659
Psalm 91 is pretty damned effective, in the right circumstances.
Luke 23:36
He said to them, “But now let the one who has a moneybag take it, and likewise a knapsack. And let the one who has no sword sell his cloak and buy one.
The most /k/ quote in the bible.
>>16949687
God is BASED.
Matthew 7:3
And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?
>>16953230
'smoke weed everyday' snoop dog 4:20
>>16947504
Damn. That's pretty heavy.
>>16949711
It's always either some chinless fathead or a greasy-haired dipstick that doesn't know that all of your blacks have to match. Even your Velcro New Balance, Kayden. Even those.
Intellectual superiority obviously puts you on the path of "fashion abomination". Casts that misguided inferiority complex in a sharp relief, it does.
>>16949752
I like these.
>>16947425
And god said "Fuck the faggots, every single fucking last one of them," and the faggots were fucked.
FAITHFUL are the wounds of a friend....
BUT the kisses of an enemy are deceitful....
Proverbs 27:6
>>16953029
>>16953029
I just read it in context. I do not understand what you mean. Would you explain your idea of it?
2 Corinthians 4:4
Satan, who is the god of this world, has blinded the minds of those who don’t believe.
>>16953360
Lol.
>>16947425
Ezekiel 23:20
She lusted after lovers with genitals as large as a donkey's and emissions like those of a horse
>>16955286
This is not an argument for the existence of the demiurge. It's figurative, i.e. the evil snake has ruined the earth and shit things up, but it's going to be punished by Father God.
>>16950064
Dagon was actually a god of grain, the fish tail thing is a misattribution.
Also that's Triton, not Poseidon.
Like, go back to Zeitgeist with this weak shit.
>>16949687
KJV says "13 - Certain men, the children of Belial, are gone out from among you, and have withdrawn the inhabitants of their city, saying, let us go and serve other gods, which ye have not known"
Certain translations tend to take a lot of interpretive liberty. Also, Leviticus-Deuteronomy was mostly Law of Moses, which includes tons of crazy shit that only pre-Christian Jews followed.
Revelation 6:13-15
13 And the stars of heaven fell unto the earth, even as a fig tree casteth her untimely figs, when she is shaken of a mighty wind.
14 And the heaven departed as a scroll when it is rolled together; and every mountain and island were moved out of their places.
15 And the kings of the earth, and the great men, and the rich men, and the chief captains, and the mighty men, and every bondman, and every free man, hid themselves in the dens and in the rocks of the mountains;
Why do people believe in this shit? All of this shit is obviously myth.
>>16956345
Dummy.
>>16956356
How am I a dummy? You fucking literal retard.
Proverbs 14:12,13
There is a way which seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death.
Even in laughter the heart is sorrowful; and the end of that mirth is heaviness.
Solomon was pretty deep, I'd recommend Proverbs even to non-christians.
>>16956362
The fact that you're asking how you're a dummy proves your stupid. If you weren't you wouldn't have to ask.
>>16956367
Because I said all of it is myth? It is.
>>16956362
sick burn mate, another victory for /r/atheism
>>16956370
>desperate guessing from an idiot
>>16956377
This from the retard.
>>16956374
Mad cause your bullshit is bullshit. That's all it will ever be.
>>16956383
Oh no. He called me what i called him first. Psych.
>>16949292
What chapter is this from?
>>16956288
I dislike religion to an extent (though I do believe very strongly in God) but people who criticize religion when they know almost nothing about it are the worst kind of intellectual frauds and angsty fedora tipping dipshits. Thank you for putting that faggot in his place.
>>16956397
Kill yourself, you have nothing valuable to add.
>>16956407
>you're not allowed to criticize religion unless you're an expert theologian
*tips crown of thorns*
>>16956430
Nice straw man, retard.
This is the shit I'm talking about. If you're going to be a hardcore fedora tipper at least be a bit logical. Fuck.
>>16956430
Am I correct in assuming that you are the same person as this >>16956345 post?
You're totally entitled to your opinion man, but I'm pretty sure you're exactly the kind of person he's talking about.
>>16956449
No, the *tips crown of thorns* guy is not me. How is the Bible being myth an opinion? It's an observation, you dildo.
>>16956460
noun
1.
a traditional or legendary story, usually concerning some being or hero or event, with or without a determinable basis of fact or a natural explanation, especially one that is concerned with deities or demigods and explains some practice, rite, or phenomenon of nature.
>>16956467
How does the Bible not fit into that definition? You absolute retard. Anyone can look and see that you're the one who's wrong here. All the Bible does is explain practices and rites.
>>16956475
>How does the Bible not fit into that definition?
what the fuck? obviously it does, that's why i posted it
>>16956488
Oh, I thought you were the guy who called me an idiot and said it's just my opinion.
>>16956475
>all the Bible does is explain practices and rites
You clearly are not familiar with the Bible. The Bible clearly fits the definition of a myth but it there's way more in it than explanations of practices and rites. If you're trying to sound ignorant then congratulations. You've exceeded your own expectations.
>>16956475
Alright man, explain your perspective. Have you actually read the bible? Do you have reputable points of evidence against it? Do you have any more to offer than the typical internet religion patrol rebelling against his catholic parents or will you just continue to recite /r/atheism tier 2 bit condescending nonsense?
>>16956423
YOU kill yourself.
>>16956506
Why would I need evidence to prove that the Bible is myth. It's not history, that's a fact. It's obvious myth. Like Exodus never happened. Noah's Ark isn't real. Samson in Kings is fiction obviously. The Book of Daniel is myth. Etc.
>>16956506
>Have you actually read the bible?
read a fair bit of it and it bores me to death
>Do you have reputable points of evidence against it?
is there anything you'd accept as a falsification
>>16956512
Oh you were there? Wow I guess it's all false then, shit I'd better become a buddhist
>>16956528
Well that's above average at least, maybe it won't change my mind, but I'd at least know that your statements against it are backed by more than personal opinion
>>16956534
>The were you there argument
My sides. That's the best you have?
>>16956534
Explain to me why you think it's real? What would possess you to think this shit?
>>16956549
But it reads like fiction. It doesn't read like a historical account.
>>16956558
>It doesn't read like a historical account.
it does if you cut out the mythological bullshit
>>16956561
Good luck with that.
>>16956537
>The 'My sides, that's the best you have' argument
My sides, that's the best you have?
ps: it wasn't an argument, I was mocking you, your logic is a fallacy known as "begging the question", maybe you should shrek yourself before you wreck yourself
>>16956558
Of course I can't provide logical evidence that it all happened, but the "prove it" logic works equally for both sides. Most of the story follows what's accepted as known ancient history (Egypt, Babylon, Syria, Israel, etc) but extends to history of smaller groups and individuals whose existence could never possibly be proven unless more engraved plates or hidden scrolls are discovered (which then would be suspected falsified anyway).
I'm a christian because it feels right to me, and I respect everyone else's beliefs too on the grounds that no one really has substantial evidence of how people got here and what happens when we die, so it annoys me when people start throwing around words like "sheep" and "drone" just because their own beliefs are popularly praised as 'logical and forward thinking'.
>>16956596
You're a Christian because it FEELS right to you?
Ok, I think we're done here.
>>16956561
It does if you DON'T do that and aren't a philospophical vampire called skeptic
>>16947434
Woa.. what if it was like an accident, like an injury sustained in defending the name of the lord
>>16956620
It doesn't if you both do and don't.
>>16956620
So you believe Noah was 480 years old? And that Adam lived to 980?
>>16956614
>doesn't understand faith
This is the same shit I've been talking about. You're criticizing religion and religious people based on your own world view which seems admittedly narrow. I mentioned before that I don't really like religion but I'm not going to put anyone down for being religious if their religion doesn't hurt me. I'm going to assume you think of yourself as being a skeptic but you come off as a judgmental asshole. Maybe you'll understand things when you're a little bit older slugger.
>>16956650
I really don't understand faith because faith is illogical. How you could look at a book of fiction and think anything but 'This is bullshit' is beyond me.
>>16956650
What I understand is that you're fucking afraid of death and you think the contents in a book will save you from it.
>>16956664
>is beyond me
This is completely and utterly obvious.
>>16956680
Maybe because I'm not a gullible retard. Belief doesn't give you an upperhand over people, so be quiet. Actually study history, not as a layman, as a scholar then you'll see that the Bible is not historically accurate.
>>16956620
You're as bad as this guy >>16956614
Skeptics are not "philosophical vampires" (which is neither an interesting or clever term; it's nonsensical drivel), they just demand that claims meet certain scientific parameters before they believe them to be true. It's a respectable position, if the tenets of the scientific method are adhered to. You're thinking of people who like to debunk things, especially to make someone else feel stupid. This is not skepticism. It's unwarranted self importance and condescension. Know the difference.
>>16956664
You've never read a book of fiction or even watched a movie that has changed the way you think or changed your life in a meaningful way? That's sad.
>>16956698
So because people like to debunk your position, it means they're assholes, gotcha.
>>16956664
>>16956690
It isn't, we don't claim it to be, but neither is whatever you believe.
I'll go out on a limb and assume you're an atheist, that's fine, great, but as a 'scholar' I assume you're familiar with all the problems with evolution and bio-genesis right? All the things that have like a 1 in 10^200 probability of happening? Yes? Ok, scientists solved this problem by introducing the multiverse theory, every possibility is met, and thus our existence without intelligent design is within probability. How is the multiverse theory any better than God other than being coined by a scientist?
>>16956716
Cherry picking. You took one sentence while ignoring everything else I wrote.
You guys are all slowly working through the entire list of logical fallacies. Please learn how to debate intelligently.
>>16956730
You have no idea what you're talking about and it's obvious you don't but I'm not gonna argue this with you because I'm a layman myself, you see, I don't precede to know everything.
>>16956736
The rest of the paragraph wasn't directed to me.
Proverbs 17:28
Even a fool, when he keeps silent, is considered wise;
When he closes his lips, he is considered prudent.
>>16949687
Easy ignora, fedora
>>16956737
Why? Was there a problem with what I said? I've actually studied the topic quite a bit.
Did you want to sound intimidating but weren't able to think of anything else to use?
>>16956759
Go to /sci/ with that shit and they'll probably laugh you out or they'll challenge you on it. You don't push that shit in /sci/ because you know better. You push the shit in /x/ because these people are gullible. Go to school.
Yea though I walk through the valley in the shadow of Death, I will fear no evil.
I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me.
Philippians 4:13
The He that is in me is greater than he that is of this world.
I am the Way, the Truth, and the Light. None shall pass to the father except through me.
For God so loved the world that he gave His only begotten Son. And whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have everlasting life.
John 3:16
David took his men with him and went out and killed two hundred Philistines and brought back their foreskins. They counted out the full number to the king so that David might become the king's son-in-law. Then Saul gave him his daughter Michal in marriage.
Samuel 18:27
>>16956786
Holy shit David was a gangster.
>>16956794
Samson killed 1000 Philistines.
>>16956765
I don't go to /sci/ to start fights over God, in fact I don't start these fights at all, I only get sucked into them. Nice ad hominem though, moderately rustled.
>>16956649
I know so. Because god said so and I've met him and there is no lie in him.
>>16956680
lol burned
>>16956698
No. They are vampires. They use other people to think for them and just lay on their dicks using none of their own energy to enrich their lives. Vampires of philosophy.
>>16956806
It's Abiogenesis, by the way.
>>16956811
Except the Bible was written by humans, not any god.
>>16956816
You don't understand and your mind is turned toward disbelief so I would be a fool to try to bring your mind to understanding.
>>16956799
The bible is such a great nonfiction
>>16956816
I'm sad that faith is alien to you. Your parents burdened you without a trust in Gods ability.
>>16947425
Hyperpenis 1:8 "Hyperpenis."
>>16956819
You believe this shit because you think it makes you special or you're stupid, one of the two. I used to believe this shit too.
>>16956829
Psalms is so sad, it's an apology letter from David to God.
>>16956827
Cop out. Think for yourself.
>>16956833
No I believe this shot because the alternative is impossible. Matter cannot be created or destroyed by sciences own ever-changing logic. By the reason how did the Big Bang occur? The thing that baffles me is how short sighted you so called scholars are. You're so busy being mortified of the possibility that maybe, just maybe, we are very small fish in a very big pond.
>>16956824
Yes. It is.
>>16956833
No. I believe it because I know and understand it and can see it is right and good using faculties which are better than your faculties. You're SO dumb that you don't even know you're dumb. You DO know your unhappy and wish things would change but you hide it from everyone. I know though because god reveals everything to me.
>>16956827
Man, these fucking brainwashed retards. Can you imagine being as stupid and lame as this fucking guy, utterly convinced that some arbitrary mythology is 100% true because his Jonestown-esque parents and community were just kind enough not to inject him with cyanide? What a sad fucking retard, completely lost to the real world. Just a waste of human DNA.
>>16956834
The Psalms are everything.
And he hath put a new song in my mouth, even praise unto our God: many shall see it, and fear, and shall trust in the LORD.
- Psalm 40:3
"Meaningless, meaningless says the teacher, utterly meaningless. Everything is meaningless.
What do people gain from all their labors under which they toil under the sun? Generations come, and generations go, yet the earth remains forever.
The sun rises, and the sun sets and harks back to where it rises. The wind blows to the north, and turns to the south, round and round it goes, ever returning to its course. All streams flow into the sea, but the sea is never full. From the place the streams come from there they return again.
All things are wearisome, more than one can say. The eye never has enough of seeing, nor the ear its fill of hearing. What has will be again. What has been done will be done again. There is nothing new under the sun. Is there anything which one can say, 'Look, this is something new?' It was here already long ago. It was here before our time.
No one remembers former generations, or those who are yet to come. We're not going to be remembered by those that follow.
I, the Teacher, was king over Israel in Jerusalem. 13 I applied my mind to study and to explore by wisdom all that is done under the heavens. What a heavy burden God has laid on mankind! 14 I have seen all the things that are done under the sun; all of them are meaningless, a chasing after the wind.
What is crooked cannot be straightened; what is lacking cannot be counted.
I said to myself, “Look, I have increased in wisdom more than anyone who has ruled over Jerusalem before me; I have experienced much of wisdom and knowledge.” 17 Then I applied myself to the understanding of wisdom, and also of madness and folly, but I learned that this, too, is a chasing after the wind.
For with much wisdom comes much sorrow; the more knowledge, the more grief.
>>16956850
>>16956847
Shit* iPhone please.
>>16956834
For a long time I thought it was pretty words written in a pretty book that meant nothing. Then life happened and when I had nowhere to turn I had to sleep in my buddies garage. Jesus came to me in a dream and told me to "serve at sea". I enlisted in the navy and by some miracle scored high enough on the ASVAB to where I had every job available to me.
>>16956847
You sound as stupid as you made yourself sound before.
>>16956849
Except there's no any evidence for any god. Every experience people have with god(s) is subjective to what they believe or what is going on around them. You think this shit makes you special? It doesn't. You would never argue this shit with people who know what they're talking about because you're disingenuous.
>>16956861
WHERE did you get that pic?
>>16956850
>name fagging
>aggressive language
>purely insulting
INTO THE HELL IT GOES
>>16956813
sorry, It's been a while
>>16956866
You're dumb. I don't need your permission and empiricism to perceive and know what I've perceived and know. And you better not blaspheme me.
(continued)
"I said to myself, “Come now, I will test you with pleasure to find out what is good.” But that also proved to be meaningless. 2 “Laughter,” I said, “is madness. And what does pleasure accomplish?” 3 I tried cheering myself with wine, and embracing folly—my mind still guiding me with wisdom. I wanted to see what was good for people to do under the heavens during the few days of their lives.
I undertook great projects: I built houses for myself and planted vineyards. 5 I made gardens and parks and planted all kinds of fruit trees in them. 6 I made reservoirs to water groves of flourishing trees. 7 I bought male and female slaves and had other slaves who were born in my house. I also owned more herds and flocks than anyone in Jerusalem before me. 8 I amassed silver and gold for myself, and the treasure of kings and provinces. I acquired male and female singers, and a harem[a] as well—the delights of a man’s heart. 9 I became greater by far than anyone in Jerusalem before me. In all this my wisdom stayed with me.
I denied myself nothing my eyes desired; I refused my heart no pleasure. My heart took delight in all my labor, and this was the reward for all my toil.
Yet when I surveyed all that my hands had done and what I had toiled to achieve,
everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind; nothing was gained under the sun.
Then I turned my thoughts to consider wisdom, and also madness and folly.
What more can the king’s successor do than what has already been done?
I saw that wisdom is better than folly, just as light is better than darkness.
The wise have eyes in their heads, while the fool walks in the darkness; but I came to realize that the same fate overtakes them both.
Then I said to myself,
“The fate of the fool will overtake me also. What then do I gain by being wise?” I said to myself, “This too is meaningless.”
>>16956866
Believing in God doesn't make you special. It's what you do afterwards that gets notice. David isn't famous for believing in God. He's famous for being an unmatched warrior that took on armies.
>>16956878
I'll smack the shit out of you, who are you?
>>16956868
From anon.
>>16956866
Took on armies in the name of God.
Here's some PC principle
>>16956881
Sorry, let me rephrase, it makes you feel special.
>>16956886
Prime example of someone feeling special.
>>16956889
Not really. I get a cog in the machine kind of feeling from it.
(continued)'
For the wise, like the fool, will not be long remembered; the days have already come when both have been forgotten. Like the fool, the wise too must die!
So I hated life, because the work that is done under the sun was grievous to me. All of it is meaningless, a chasing after the wind. I hated all the things I had toiled for under the sun, because I must leave them to the one who comes after me. And who knows whether that person will be wise or foolish? Yet they will have control over all the fruit of my toil into which I have poured my effort and skill under the sun. This too is meaningless. So my heart began to despair over all my toilsome labor under the sun. For a person may labor with wisdom, knowledge and skill, and then they must leave all they own to another who has not toiled for it. This too is meaningless and a great misfortune. What do people get for all the toil and anxious striving with which they labor under the sun? All their days their work is grief and pain; even at night their minds do not rest. This too is meaningless."
From the mind of the great Solomon himself.
Don't you see op? None of this matters. None of it.
>>16956892
I was speaking of David. I originally wrote that he took on armies but meant that he took on armies in the name of God.
>>16956882
I AM.
>>16956898
I don't think God browses /x/. If He does is have to apologize a lot.
>>16956898
See? You are... nobody. You're not special.
>>16956897
Yeah, I kind of gathered that after the fact. My fault.
>>16956910
It's all good I posted it in a needlessly convoluted way.
>>16956910
That's what my mom says. And she's an empty husk.
>>16956898
Shhhhh. You'll wake >THE JEWS.
Here is how to break all of this down. Can a person who believes that the Bible/Christianity in any form can show any meaningful truth better than any other form of mythology? to do this they would have to appeal outside their mythos, and provide real facts and reasoning. So can any Christian do this?
Simply put, no Christian has so far. They mirror every other religion on the planet. They don't stand out. So Christians who admit it's just a personal faith are good, but those that try to argue otherwise, they're liars.
>>16956918
Or Popeye.
>>16956918
>>16956922
Christ's resurrection is not part of the "mythos," it is historical fact.
>>16956925
>>16956925
keks. That image makes me laugh like a little baby man.
>>16956934
Your post made me smile. God bless you.
>>16956933
No it isn't you lying sack of shit. No wonder everyone hates Christians anymore, all they do is lie.
>>16956922
It's a personal faith that spread further than any other in all of history. Jesus existed, there are reports of Him performing miracles that were sent to Caesar along with a message from the corrupt synagogue leaders asking for soldiers to crucify Jesus.
Now let's back up. Someone who claims to be the Son is either one of 3 things:
A liar
Insane
Or the Son of a living God
Jesus turned other people into his fold. He was so influential that even educated doctors fell to their feet at the sight of Him.
Would DOCTORS follow a man so insane He thought he was the Son?
Jesus preached truth and peace through this adult life. Documents show he never wavered on any of Hos teachings, something even the most skilled liars fail to accomplish: getting all the details right over YEARS.
How could you call a man who never lied a liar?
That leaves the only remaining possibility and as so commonly referenced; Sherlock Holmes says it bluntly.
When you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains no matter how improbable MUST be the truth.
>>16956933
I'll go one step further and say it is fact even if everyone forgets and burns the records. It happens and the world is how it is because it WAS. It's incontrovertible.
>>16956950
Preach.
>>16956922
>
>>16956933
Guys, hi, it's me the internet. We've all heard these arguments before, so in the interest of saving time, let's fast forward a bit.
>christian guy
(various stuff about Flavious Josephus and there being more historical evidence for jesus than the existence of king arthur)
> Atheist guy
One by one, gruelingly going over each point and attempting to disprove. Then, conversation transitions over to science
> Christian guy
Gives info about intelligent design, says it can so happen.
> Atheist guy
argues against intelligent design with various sciency facts
>Christian guy
Compares atheist guy to hitler
>atheist guy
compares christian guy to stalin
>and no bible quoting was ever done again. The end.
>>16956942
Yes it is my fanny frazzled friend. No wonder everyone thinks you're hilarious, all you do is goof.
>>16956943
Yes. You said a good thing.
>>16956955
If quoting the bible annoys you so much then you're welcome to leave.
This is a thread about the bible.
>>16956961
Pet3r, you get instabanned if you use your real nick. Even most Christians don't claim Christ's resurrection is historic fact.
You're a bad person, a liar. You are an evil man and people don't like you.
>>16956963
Actually, I quite enjoy quoting the Bible. Too bad you're too busy arguing over nothing to be able to do so yourself.
Trolls beat ya, chief.
>>16956955
No, dude, you missed it. Shitclown there wasn't saying Jesus as a person was historically accepted. Read again. That moron was saying the RESURRECTION was historically accepted.
And here's the sad thing. He's not a troll. He really believes that stupid shit.
>>16956963
If you ever learned to stop lying about the Bible, you realize your threads would go more smoothly, right?
>>16956969
Hey man, I don't know if you can talk. After all, you can't serve soup by the slice. Your whole nick is a lie. How can we trust you?
>>16956976
Only if I give up.
I'll die before I let someone say God isn't real and Jesus isn't the Son of God without correcting them.
>>16956986
When did I lie?
Everything I've stated is factual.
For reference I posted
>>16956943
>>16956988
YOU
FREEZE THE SOUP
YOU UNIMAGINATIVE RETARD
THEN YOU CUT IT
THIS ISN'T EVEN AN ESPECIALLY DIFFICULT PUZZLE
IT
JUST
ILLUSTRATES
HOW BLINDLY IGNORANT
MOST PEOPLE
ARE
TO THINKING
HATE....YOU.....
actually I kinda love you because i suspect that you knew all this already and just fed me that line so I could rant so...thank you ^_^ !
>>16956969
>Even most Christians don't claim Christ's resurrection is historic fact.
No, wtf?
>>16956986
Friend I've got all night and I've done this song and dance a hundred times. The He that is in me is greater than the he that is of this world.
>>16956991
So you're not going to quote the Bible then? Because I was having fun.
>>16957010
This threw me for a loop too. They aren't Christians if they don't believe in the Resurrection
>>16957013
What kind of verse you looking for bro. Sorry if I got defensive but my faith is the most important thing to me.
>>16956969
The first half of your post is demonstrably false.
The second half is not for me to judge.
>>16957001
Yeah, but who's going to eat frozen soup? That just sounds gross.
I still say you're a liar...until you eat some.
I think we have tumblrinas shitposting in here.
>>16957019
Intelligent Christians know what objective history is and are intelligent and honest enough to not lie about their faith. Yes they believe Christ ressurected, but they also know that human history does not record that accurately. They're honest, good, Christians as opposed to the lying, shrieking shit brain Christians we have here on /x/. That, in fact, describes the difference perfectly. Thank you!
>>16957028
Pet3r, are you being true or facetious
>>16957029
YOU SLICE IT THEN YOU LET IT THAW OH MY GOD YOU WANT SO MUCH HAND HOLDING ARE YOU TRYING TO DATE ME?
I might be into that.
>>16957032
I think you're a little embarrassed cause you're losing an argument and you said something dumb.
"Most Christians don't believe in the resurrection"
Can't really come back from that one...
>>16957039
hahahaha what a fucking freak, even the way you type is autistic
Ez ignora, fedora
>>16957042
No sir, I said most Christians don't believe that the resurrection is objectively historically demonstrated.
See how you need to lie? You're not a real Christian. You just claim to be a Christian to belong to a political club. Real Christians don't lie. Lying is a sin. But you lied. So you don't believe in Jesus at all.
>>16957039
Problem's still not solved, chief, now it's not frozen anymore. I suppose you could serve it like some kind of weird cold potpie, but it still wouldn't taste all that great. Maybe throw in some ice cream or something...Damn I'm hungry now. Fuck 4chan. I'm getting food.
capchas aren't helping either.
>>16957038
True.
>>16957063
You clearly don't know how to cook. What the FUCK do you think canned soups are but frozen, sliced and distributed portions.
And Campell's CHICKEN AND STARS IS DELICIOUS AND IF YOU SAY IT ISN'T YOU ARE A LIAR
>>16957057
You obviously know nothing of the bible if you think real Christians are sinless purified individuals. Your attempts to unhinge me are frankly childish, and as such I reported you for being underage b8.
I'll admit; I'm on my cell phone so this long winded paragraph mildly annoys me, but past that your blatant trolling has failed more miserably than the assassination of Fidel Castro
>>16957070
why are you namefagging LOL
you're literally the epitome of autism
>>16957073
Oh god here we go, another deep fried southern "Christian" that argues knowing jack shit about science is what MAKES them Christian.
If you're not Catholic, the single LARGEST Christian denomination, then go sulk in the corner you sad fucking wannabees. You're just fringe trash and you know it.
>>16957057
Historical fact is not the same thing as "objectively historically demonstrated". Something may be a historical fact yet not be "objectively historically demonstrated".
Also, most Christians who've taken the time to research the historicity of Jesus usually claim (confirmation bias or not) that there is sufficient historical proof.
>Real Christians don't lie. Lying is a sin. But you lied. So you don't believe in Jesus at all.
This is just stupid.
>>16957081
u wot.
