Remember your first blowjob, /tv/?
>Gravy's good tonight
>>70637058
sure did, it only took the guy 3 minutes to cum.
>>70637058
yeah, your mudda was workin the bon bon concession at the eiffel tower
>>70637058
it was in a theatre AMA
Sure, it was amazing. Had a gay guy film as a woman sucked me off. Then down the line the gay guy did as well. Truly, bisexuality is the patrician's choice.Also black women and gay men give the best head
Yeah it was sad. The girl was afraid of it and barely put any effort
She's a malignant CUNT!
>>70637058
Never had one.
>>70637405
Figures
i was the blow job
Yes, we were drunk as shit, she was crying and I was feeling depressed. Very weird night. She left immediately after and I never saw her again.
>>70637058
Yep, it was the closest thing to sex that i ever had. Friends called hookers and bought one for me. She was just sucking for about 20 minutes and then looked at her phone and said "times up, i have to go. Sorry you couldn't cum". All that time i was waiting when will the real coitus start, since i didn't enjoy blow job at all. It felt like someone is trying to bit your dick off (i could feel her teeth stumbling on my dick) and didn't even had boner not only because blow job wasn't pleasant at all, but the girl was chubby and hideous. So, i guess i was supposed to tell her that i don't want her sucking my dick anymore?
>>70637964
Why would you want to fuck the disease filled thing?
>>70637058
was brilliant, after she blew me she blew out all six candles on her birthday cake
>>70638061
I wore condom, besides thats the only thing i'll ever be able to fuck.
>>70638093
My first blowjob included my first girlfriend and happened in a movie theatre in 2007 during the showing of 'There will be blood'. Since then I developed a liking for cinematic viewing and most of the times I get a boner while going to the cinema.
Not even kidding.
>staring out the window thinking 'isn't this supposed to feel better?'
>she went to the bathroom to wipe off her tongue every time she got precum in her mouth, literally every other minute
>didn't cum
Wew
Vaguely. I remember the fucking after more.
>>70638093
Yeah, it fucking sucked, Paulie.
>>70637058
Never had one, but my wife loves them.
>>70640279
Does she have a feminine penis?
>>70639584
what's this from?
>>70637790
>She was crying
absolutelyerect.jpg
>>70640769
good god, does he really explain the joke after? and do the subs really just say "heh heh heh"?
>>70641257
WATCH IT CHRISSY
>>70637058
right after watching Scott Pilgrim at my place, with a very pretty girl from my high school, who had a tongue piercing. that sensational feeling stayed with me 4 ever
>>70640769
>heh heh heh
https://youtu.be/R4Ot4u_3Ao8?t=55s
Nothing but teeth. Then she tried riding on top and broke my dick in half
>had sex
>gf was a prude never gave blowjobs
>pay for expensive hooker
>she looks mediocre
>thinking to myself I wasted my money
>she goes down
>holy motherfucking shit
>the world is wonderful
>problems with premature ejaculation gone because this feeling is too good
>literally in heaven for a few minutes
I actually regretted fucking her, it felt so much worse
O-of course. You don't think there's any weirdo adult virgins here or anything, d-do you?
>sucks me until I'm almost ready to cum
>then gets on top of me and I have to push her off literally two thrusts in
>>70641955
Take it from me lad, vaginas are gross as shit. Seriously disgusting to look upon. Congratulations on your doubles, today is a fine day for you.
>>70640607
https://youtu.be/yYgVGXdRkng?t=1m4s
>>70642130
>this
I'd pick dubs over vaginas any day
>>70642169
This
>>70639584
sounds like a joke from good will hunting
>>70637058
Yes all 3 times were terrible, by the same girl
>>70642492
These
>>70637964
>So, i guess i was supposed to tell her that i don't want her sucking my dick anymore?
Yes? That's what you were supposed to do bro.
>>70637058
Remember when is the lowest form of conversation.
>>70642843
Word to the wise
Remember Pearl Harbor
>>70637790
Dan, pls go
>>70642964
Kind of tempted to make some Sopranoswave music now
>>70641257
https://youtu.be/6lUPPDqanuw?t=2m13s
He does it all the time.
Yes I'm pretty sure we were watching the climax of A New Hope
>>70637790
>crying girl giving you a blowjob
>waah i'm depwessed ;(
When WILL the memes end?
tfw I wanted this thread to be more about the sopranos.
I just finished it and now I have profound sadness. I swear to god I thought Paulie was gonna be gay by the end of the show.
>>70637065
fucking gravy, i don't know if it's a NJ thing but half the shit they said was so retarded, it's not even proper italian slang. and why is it so hard to just say sauce? i guess that's what Chase was going for though, these second generationers who wanted so desperately to be like their dads and follow their old school italian mob ethics but fail miserably
My first gf was wretched at giving head. She scraped with her teeth like crazy and it was awful. And she loved giving them but they were all terrible, I thought they were all bad until my next gf and I found out you could actually get pleasure out of it.
>>70644225
Gravy is gravy, you turkey. It's not sauce.
>>70644146
They hinted towards it to so that people would be amazed that the writers didn't stoop that low.
>>70639760
holy shit what a cunt
>>70644291
no they constantly refer to pasta sauce as gravy throughout the show, like when they went to italy and Paulies asks tot o pass it or when Jackie asks Ralph for a piece in the kitchen while he's making pasta
Breaking Bad really missed some great banter like Sopranos did.
Sopranos will be memorable to this day because all the great banter.
She was a Chinese-Indonesian mom with big ass tits. She was 25 and I was 21. She claimed she was good at it but it was very forgettable, I just played with her tits all the way through.
I still to this day have never ever had a good blowjob and I've had it from at least 7 different chicks.
>>70641257
Yeah, it's brilliant. Really rubs it in.
Hey guys how do you make yourself last longer? My gf wants to ditch condoms and cum inside her with the pill, but I feel like I'm gonna bust real quick
>>70643679
>one in a million, kid now let's blow this thing and go home!
>>70645054
>chicks
well theres your problem
yes, she didnt make me cum
she hasn't made me cum once in 1 year, but it's probably because of my past masturbation habits. I don't understand how I'm supposed to cum with her. I think that I flex my thighs/ass when I'm jacking off, do normal people do that? Do you just lay/stand up and relax and she does her thing?
>>70644631
>god tier
>shah of iran
eat shit
>>70644631
I can't even begin to fathom how inaccurate this list is.
It's objectively over 95% wrong.
>>70644631
>Feech
>low tier
Fuck outta here
malignant CUNT
>>70644631
Shit tier and Anthony Jr isn't on it.
>>70641257
that's what makes it so funny
re-watching now, ya prick.
>>70641462
Most nerve-wracking scene in the series desu
>>70644631
So many things wrong with this list but the worst is definitely:
>Melfi in low tier
>mfw
>>70644631
off yourself
Yeah. It sucked.
:^)
It was terrible bros
She sucked me off with a condom and it didn't do anything to me, she sucked like 20 minutes and I just lied there (kind of enjoyed it but didn't really go anywhere), it was my first time and I didn't really have the confidence to move on from the blowjob so it was super awkward for me.
>>70647570
I know that feel.
The condom kind of ruined it but then again it did allow me to last about 7 minutes due to a lack of sensation.
After a few minutes the poor girl (who admittedly worked hard to get me off) was visibly frustrated that I didn't cum but afterwards I told her that it was due to the condom.
I remember, was like 15. I guess I got lucky, was in her birthday party when she called me to go inside her house. We locked ourselves there and the magic happened. She was also 9/10, blonde rich grill. Nevar forget.
>>70645896
you get used to it
if she loves you she'll understand
im a kissless 21 year old virgin without a drivers license.
>>70647570
>blowjob with a condom
It's like drinking light beer
>>70645896
Practice and experience - there are no magical exercises or techniques to last longer.
If anything foreplay can help get her hot and ready while slowing down the pace so you don't bust so quickly.
>>70644225
>it's not even proper italian slang
Well, it use to be. You nailed it on your last point, Chase was constantly portraying the current generation of mob goons grasping at nostalgia and looking at mob life through rose-tinted goggles.
>>70637058
Yeah.
It was alright.
>>70645824
>>70646292
i guess reading it and hearing it are different. those "heh heh heh"s at the end especially make it look like those are the english translations of the chinese dubs. odd.
>>70641257
Paulie throughout the show just constantly tries to overly impress Tony. One example.
Yeah it kind of sucked.
The girl had no idea what she was doing. She learned eventually though.
>>70644631
Livia should be in Low Tier. Furio should be in God Tier (perfect enforcer/loyal soldier)
>>70646060
Feech was annoying
>>70645953
Phil is based despite being the villain
>>70637058
Unbelievably hot girl who had a long term boyfriend prior to me (who still loved her).
Anyway she was sexy and experienced but then somehow when she sucked me off it was so much teeth that i started laughing out loud.
She said "what's wrong?"
mustve known she gave shit head, maybe her mouth just couldnt open enough. She did have a little face
>>70645054
Badger and Skinny Pete
Hank and Gomez
Saul Goodman
>>70637278
How were the crab legs?
>>70637278
Could you explain the falcon meme to me please?
>>70645896
I used to think this when i first started dating my gf. She didnt like condems and only wanted pull out. I was used to condems and was afraid of the same thing. I naturally didnt last as long at first, but I got muuuuch longer pretty fast.
She should be cool with it. Might even like it because its flattering. Then if you ever get back to the rubbers you can go for like an hour and a half
>>70648087
show yourself the door, you stupid fuck
>>70644225
I'm jersey and its fucking sauce. Gravy id the brown shit for turkey.
Dont believe this fat fraud
