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File: allstarrace.jpg (66KB, 620x324px) Image search: [Google] [Yandex] [Bing]
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The 2016 Sprint All-Star Race OFFICIAL RACETHREAD

Starting Grid:

Row 1: Harvick, Ky. Busch
Row 2: Ku. Busch, Edwards
Row 3: Johnson, Keselowski
Row 4: Elliott, Logano
Row 5: Truex, Jr.
Row 6: Kenseth, Hamlin
Row 7: McMurray, Kahne
Row 8: Newman, Bayne
Row 9: Stewart, Larson
Row 10: Patrick, Biffle
>>
post an HD stream ya dip
>>
who /6-time/ here?
>>
why did keselowski get boo'd?

he's the best driver to root for
>>
dubs and Carl wins
trips and Biffle
>>
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>>
WHO /DIBURRITO/ HERE???

Oh, that's right, nascar kikes rigged the vote to appeal to women.
>>
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>No Blaney
>>
>>67759594
Pretty sure people don't like Penske in general
>>
>>67759560
https://www.foxsportsgo.com/
>>
>>67759560
replying to myself because OP never delivered

http://www.ustream.tv/channel/nascar49c?rmalang=en_US

DO NOT POST TO LEDDIT OR THEY WILL DOX THE CHANNEL
>>
Someone please tell me they got a cap of that motherfucker with a keytar in the background.
>>
>>67759641

>mfw this is what i've been using and it's stuttering and laggy as fuck

WHY DO I EVEN PAY THESE FUCKS $100 A MONTH FOR CABLE?
>>
>le goofy dancing girl

I want Sprint to leave.
>>
>75% boos for Joey Logayno
>50/50 split boos/cheers for Jimmie Johnson
>>
why are chevy commercials so bad??
>>
>spotter: Tim Fedewa
As in the Fedewa from the early 2000s Busch series?
>>
>larry the cable guy commercial

stupid conservative asshole
>>
what time does the race start?
>>
>>67759686
Just a long list in a series of advertising memes in NASCAR threads.
Speaking of which, who /mashedpotatoes/ here
>>
>>67759729
what race? this is just intro week
>>
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>>67759724
>tfw every race thread has to have /pol/b8
>>
>NASCAR cringe fest

this is why you are losing fans, NASCAR, this shit is fucking why

stop it
>>
>>67759732
/narwhals/ over here
>>
>>67759722
Yes

>>67759729
""""soon"""
>>
>>67759679
see
>>67759654

I agree. After I moved to the country after college I now have 6mb internet and no TV package.

But I do have a gigantic antenna on my roof with one of those electric spinner deals and I can easily stream the race on my comp + raceview on my iPad simultaneously
>>
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This shit's pretty fun although the band was hella gay.
>>
>>67759722
He's been Harvick's spotter for a while now. But yeah, same guy.
>>
>>67759686

next year it's gonna be Credit One

there's rumors that Credit one is in talks

NASCAR Credit One Cup Series
>>
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>Danica will never be your All-Star
>>
>this sprint shilling

jesus fucking christ

this is too much
>>
>Grid walk
oh fuck, here we go
>>
Why is Miss Sprint Cup a thing? Why do they only use her for shilling?
>>
>mikey being creepy as fuck
>>
/miss steve/
>>
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>Bryson Byrnes
>>
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>Small loan of a million dollars
>>
>thats stealing and you're going to go to jail now

lol
>>
SMALL LOAN OF A MILLION DOLLARS
THIS FUCKING KID OH MY GOD

>>67759787
Gordon married one of the Miss Winstons way back when.
>>
>>67759776
>not the NASCAR Walmart Cup Series
>>67759787
>Why is Miss Sprint Cup a thing?
i ask myself that question every day
>>
>small loan of a million dollars
>>
fuck this is just a fucking commercial with cringe thrown in
>>
I was banned last week and could post about it, but did anyone catch the bit with Waltrip just before his grid walk where he called out Gordon for taking his booth seat? was prime kek
>>
HOLY SHIT KID BTFO JUNIOR

JUNIORFAGS ON SUICIDE WATCH
>>
This turned into the most awkward pre-race show ever.
>>
>does he even drive
SMOKE DOESN'T FUCKING CARE ANYMORE
>>
Kid get away before Tony murders you
>>
STEWART BEING RACIST
>>
BRYSON BRINGING THE BANTZ WALTRIP BTFO
>>
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eeehh that kid...
>>
mikey continuously

b
t
f
o
>>
>>67759853
He purposely didn't want a big sendoff like Gordon so he could meme hard the whole season
>>
Did anyone catch last week's grid walk with Danica? It was beyond cringe
>>
Bryson sounds like he wants to die, so sad
>>
>y-y-you have to b-be the very best
Kid goes to /sp/ confirmed
>>
>>67759888
truthful trips
Smoke is too jaded to deal with the same shit
>>
at what point did Bryson say "small loan of 1 million dollars?"
>>
>>67759927
Like no one ever was?
>>
>>67759821

Walmart has no interest in being the title sponsor for anything, they said that a year or so ago when asked because they have a merch partnership with NASCAR

realisticly, it's either Credit One, Samsung, K&N, or, and this is a longshot

Microsoft
>>
Get Bryson a contract and get him doing color commentary in the booth NOW.
>>
>>67759946
probably because le smoke ruthlessly killed an unarmed teenager and felt so bad that he couldn't race the rest of the year

Pussy!
>>
>>67759979

NASCAR Credit One Cup is catchy and i kind of like it
>>
god isn't real

fuck off joe gibbs
>>
>Joe Gibbs giving the invocation

Isn't that conflict of interest?
>>
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>>67759895
what happened
>>
>>67759979
Big Daddy's BBQ Cup
>>
>God

wew
>>
BASED BIGGS
>>
Let's trigger the /sp/JW faggots and pray for our nation, pray for our military, and pray for our sport
>>
>>67760019
>All race payouts are now on a Credit One Visa gift card

I like it
>>
>>67759748
>tfw every race thread has butthurt sensitive faggots that can't handle banter
>>
check that mullet
>>
>>67760046
he kept asking what yoga she did that morning and she pretty much shot down every thing he said
>>
Does this guy know he looks like he sings in a second-rate bar band at a rundown shack in the Charlotte suburbs?
>>
hey a fellow anon is on the stage
>>
>>67760056
Remember when Big Daddy's ruined like 2 or 3 Cup teams back in the day?

/sp/epperidge Farm remembers.
>>
>>67760056

7/11 Cup

US Cellular Cup
Walmart Cup
Target Cup
Stihl Cup
K&N Cup

all names that are in talks
>>
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>>67760124
>no McDonald's McCup
>no Taco Bell Cup
>>
>>67760046
>you will never grope a concussed Danica in the medical center
>>
>>67760106
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O9_Gvbn2pFs

This guy did it best.
>>
>>67760116

>/sp/epperidge Farm remembers

mother fucker i laughed at that
>>
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lvjtKv0mikY
>>
>>67760064

you don't actually believe a magic sky wizard randomly got bored one day and decided to create the solar system and humanity, right?

I always was under the impression people were being ironic when they said they believed in god
>>
>>67760124
>>67760056
>>67759979
How about the Jimmie Johnson cup? He's going to win it easily this year now that gordon's gone
>>
>>67760064
>>67743036
>>67743212
>>67743427
>>67758026
how many of these are yours
>>
Are Danicles and Steakhouse still a couple?
>>
>>67760046
why does she look so cute in this gif?
>>
>land of the fray
what did he mean by this?
>>
>>67760145
Imagine if Danica went the way of Russell Phillips. NASCAR would be over.
>>
>>67760064
>>>/pol/
>>
>>67760170
i hope she comes out as a lesbian tbqh
>>
>>67760167
0

Just got back from the store and sat down to watch the race
>>
>>67760191
We aren't known for our seams
>>
>>67760124
>US Cellular Cup
Sounds boring as shit
>Walmart Cup
Sounds terrible
>Target Cup
Rednecks shit themselves because of the trans bathroom thing
>Stihl Cup
Sounds odd but it works
>K&N Cup
Do they really have the money for that?
I just figured all they could sponsor was the K&N East and West series. Realistically the best name option.
>>
>>67760170
they're in an open relationship. Danicles gets to peg steakhouse everytime she finishes in ahead of him.
>>
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>>67760056
>>
>>67760167
0

I don't actually use the term "sjw." I just call them morons.
>>
BUDWEISER CUP
>>
>>67760162
>>67760167
>>67760199

Eat it

NASCAR is a Christian sport
>>
>>67760229
>>67760124
>>67760142
>>67760165

why don't they just call it the Nascar Premier Cup?

No sponsorship or anything
>>
>>67760167
lol every single one of those was a reply to my post
>>
>>67760264
Money
>>
>>67760264
Because that means no shekels
>>
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>>67760167
>>
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>>67760264
>No sponsorship
>nascar
>>
>>67760255
someone go find that conspiracy video about the Petty family in Catawba County
>>
>>67760264
>Premier League
>not Barclay's Premier League
>>
When is the race starting?
>>
>>67760264
>No sponsorship or anything
oy vey
>>
>>67760317
They are killing time to dry the track some more
>>
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>>67760264
And not get shekels for naming rights?

That's crazy talk!!!
>>
>Greg Olsen

COME ON JUST GET ON WITH THE RACE
>>
>>67760258
Fuck. I toasted in the wrong bread.
>>
stereotypical chad
>>
>>67759979
Coke is supposedly in the running as well. They offered 50mil/yr for three years; NASCAR wants 100mil/yr for 10.
>>
>Olsen straight up lying
>>
If it rains they HAVE to keep it green. I know racing in the rain is impossible 99% of the time and stupid in normal races, but this is THE GIMMICK RACE, LET THE MEMES FLOW
>>
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>>67760264
oy
>>
>waltrip repeatedly trying to emphasize the the pit crew are athletes
>>
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>a stud
>>
is an gas man an athlete?
>>
>>67760366

>NASCAR Coca-Cola Cup Series


no, because that's literally an offline nr2003 or stop motion series you'd find on youtube

fuck no
>>
>Danica winning the fan vote

I'm calling bullshit. I'm sure she has fans, but most of them are children.

NASCAR has rigged that shit every year.
>>
>Stud

mikey finally out
>>
How come they don't have wet tires?
>>
>>67760200
Pretty sure she's into women, her getting knocked up is bad for her brand
>>
>>67760369
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bRCVmsBA7SM
>>
>>67760406

every thread
>>
>>67760406
Because who wants to watch a race in the rain? Again, the answer is shekels.
>>
>>67760404
children can vote though
>>
>>67760366
I feel like that'd be a safe choice.
>>
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>>67760406
>>
>>67760478
every thread
>>
>>67760412

>those names
>those paint schemes

Jesus fucking christ

talk about a blast from the past
>>
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ayyyyyyy
>>
>>67760408
>wins a rain shortened race
>comes out as lesbian transgender in victory lane

>instant 10 year sponsorship and guaranteed ride
>liberal media declares the day a holdiay
>>
>>67760478
every thread
>>
>>67760487
and people will still take the b8
>>
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>>67760404
The could never let a Le Reddit driver happen again

DiBurrito got shut the fuck down
>>
>>67760433
Doesn't mean they would.

I go to a few races a year and I never ever see anyone with Danica March and her hauler is always the least frequented.
>>
>>67760492
hahahahahahahaha cucked
>>
>>67760539
>always the least frequented.
doubt.jpg
>>
>>67760404
Just like the rigged qualifying for the Daytona 500.

DiBurrito most likely won.
>>
>>67760406
They do, they've used them on Xfinity for toronto, a road course, wouldn't work on oval. They had wipers too, if it makes you happy.
>>
>biffle
>>
>>67760474

photoshop

nice try
>>
why don't wet tires work on banked ovals?

no one has given a definitive reason why

everyone just says it won't.
>>
>>67760590
JUST
>>
>>67760586
He was third in Fan voting
>>
>>67760539
What races are you attending

It's not like it was a few years ago, but Danicles is still a big draw
>>
HAHA SMOKE WITH THE MOST HALF-HEARTED COMMAND EVER
>>
Chick-fil-A Cup
Craftsman Cup
Sunoco Cup
Texaco Cup
Lucas Oil Cup
Boeing Cup
Facebook Cup
Gmail Cup
Cracker Barrel Cup
Cheese Nips Cup
Pimm's Cup
Corning Cup
Carfax Cup
CarMax Cup
Carmex Cup
Tampax Cup
Kay Jewelers Cup
Stanley Cup
Sippy Cup
DD Cup
Mushroom Cup
Flower Cup
Star Cup
>>
>>67760605

because tire wear

they would wear faster than a slick, and as a result they would have to have a competition caution every 10 laps
>>
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>>
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AHAHA KEK
>>
>>67760591
>
https://youtu.be/nvDKsqWerxs?t=4187
>>
>"Low Downforce Package"

Take a drink
>>
>le digital tachometers

did they finally get speedometers?

>>67760624
>Danicles is still a big draw
huge draw

like she's top 4 in Kansas
>>
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dat smoke sad face
>>
>>67760645

Butter Cup
>>
>>67760585
Why?

She's a novelty and everyone knows it
>>
Lol, smoke is dead inside
>>
>>67760645
NASCAR Chick-Fil-A cup has a nice ring to it
>>
do they still have the extra $1m if the driver wins every segment?
>>
wait, so why doesn't steve byrnes do pit road reporting anymore anyway?

Haven't watched nascar in several years
>>
>>67760645
Stanley Tools

NASCAR Stanley Cup
>>
>>67760645
will be Coca-Cola Cup Series

you can print
>>
>>67760645
Reddit Cup :^)
>>
>>67760687
Parkay Cup
>>
It'd be funny if Patrick dies tonight. Don't get me wrong, I don't care if it's in a wreck or even during the race, just in general.
>>
>>67760692

DO IIIT

THE SJW'S WILL BE FUCKING MAD AS HELL, LET THE SALT FLOOOOOWWW
>>
>>67760650
I TRIED SO HARD

*wrecks within first five laps*
>>
>>67760699
ded
>>
song name?
>>
>>67760650
He legitimately looks like 2000ish Tony more than even in the last ten years. Maybe it's the wide-eyed look ratehr than his recent tired/squinty eyes.
>>
Berenstain Bears Cup
Berenstein Bears Cup
Ragu Cup
Rapala Crankbaits Cup
Tampax Cup
Dallas Cowboys Cup
Chex Mix Cup
Triscuit Cup
Cadbury Egg Cup
Indycar Cup
>>
>>67760699
0/10 b8 m8
>>
Any bets on when KuBu wrecks?
>>67760664
Yeah, glass cockpits now, finally.
>>
>>67760705
>All race payouts are put on Credit One Doge Coin Visa gift cards

I like it
>>
WATER COOLER DALE
>>
>>67760701
ohh that sounds good actually
>>
>175 posts
>26 posters

wew the shitposting levels are high tonight and I like it
>>
>>67760714
fuck off
>>
>Two horses died in rainy races at Preakness today
>Joey and Brad are horse faces
Guess who's dying tonight
>>
>>67760760
the lawsuits would be glorious

NHL vs NASCAR would go to the Supreme Court
>>
>>67760645
I would die happy if they painted the asphalt at Watkins Glen to look like Rainbow Road.
>>
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>>67760699

Anon...
>>
>>67760734
Thai Cup
2 Girls 1 Cup
>>
>>67760764
36* shitposters and a trip
>>
>>67760781
they gonna change the cup in name to Premier Series or something like this
>>
Big Cup
Little Cup
Jock Cup
4Chan Cup
Moot Cup
Fruit Cup
Pudding Cup
>>
>Officials Channel
Still a bunch of wet spots on the track

Let's do a circle jerk Yellow/Green
>>
>>67760768
No thanks, she's annoying and I do not like her. She was terrible in Indy car and she's just as bad here. I'm tired of it, I want her to die. I'm all for women in racing, I'm just anti her living.
>>
>>67760764
here's a lurker at least
>>
>>67760764
Everyone knows Cleveland will win the series, so we got a lot of basketball fans in here.
>>
calm down redditors
>>
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>>67760859
>>
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>>67760872
>>
>>67760872
(you)
>>
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>>67760859
>>
>two fan vote drivers

Is this Josh Wise's ultimate legacy?
>>
can they just change numbers like that?
>>
>>67760845

YES YES SHITSTORM IN TRACK

INB4 TONY WINS AFTER LOTS OF SHITSTORM
>>
Stan Lee Cup
Cannabis Cup
KFC Go Cup
Cup Noodles
>>
>>67760934
For the All-Star? Yes. in 2011 Jimmie Johnson was #5 and Mark Martin was #25
>>
Someone spins down to the bottom of the track off of 2 they're screwed.
>>
>>67760934

It's an exhibition race. If it were a real race JGR would meed to own the rights to the 75
>>
>That flared out side skirt on the drivers side of the #42 car that noone else has...
>>
>Officials Radio
Final call for spotters and drivers to object to the track conditions
>>
Are there incentives to do well in this race? Its not like usual all-star events that are meaningless right?
>>
CONFIRMED

NASCAR Coca-Cola Cup Series

to be announed at Pocono

can Coke afford that?
>>
How is this thread so active, the race hasn't even started yet god damn
>>
>>67761000
Biffle has it too
>>
>>67761000
>trips of truth
>>
>DANICA BEST RESULT IS LAST

TOP LEL
>>
>>67760934

>let's just try to get a good finish

It's the all star race. God she's stupid.
>>
>>67761014
Winner get $1 million

Everyone else gets like $100k for running costs
>>
>>67761000
That's the handicap
>>
>>67759641
Fuck this shit always messes up somehow, sometimes it just stops responding and buffers forever. Also keeps setting to low quality even though my speed is perfectly fine
>>
Is Danica racing? I'm not watching if she isn't.
>>
>>67761039
No it is not
>>
>>67761015
Coke nowdays sponsors +90% of tracks in NASCAR they can do this easly
>>
is reddit down or something

whats going on in this thread
>>
Are they just going to run them all down to like 3/4 of a tank of fuel riding around under yellow?
>>67761014
$1,000,000 to win.
>>
>>67761016

The meme format makes for extra lulz
>>
>>67761053
I was joking senpai
>>
>>67761065


if the cans of coke have NASCAR plastered on them i will hate myself for drinking it
>>
>>67760905
Actually, no, if anything I'm just a sociopath that is honest about my feelings towards bad drivers, but if it makes you feel better trying to insult me with your posts, go for it, I don't care.
>>
>>67761089
I'm amazed the officials let that car through without pounding that modification from this morning back out though
>>
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who /ragsinabox/ here
>>
>>67761098
i think that they gonna do some promo cans or something like that
>>
thread is halfway thru and we haven't started
>>
>>67761101
It still makes you an Edgy dick.
>>
>>67761015

No, Coke is on the verge of bankruptcy. They are committing suicide.

>not understanding taxes and the based advertising write off

one of the things that makes america keep going (because big bisiness can write off these advertising expenses which in turn benefit the payees)
>>
>Officials Channel

2 to go till the green at the line
>>
>>67761137
Always

>tfw no image with me
>>
>>67760919
Not even a little mad, though I never cared for Earnhardt either and I honestly laughed when he died. Now I'm actually happy, if it happened to one driver I didn't like, maybe it could happen again. Except he was an expert driver who could control races, I was just a Rusty fan.
>>
kasey kahne

followed by 20 second sprint ad
>>
i wish NA$CAR made the driver audio free
>>
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What's everyone drinking tonight?

I've got pic related.
>>
>>67761202
$4.95 per month isn't bad if you're a die hard fan
>>
>>67761028
She meant, I just hope I'm able to finish.
>>
>>67761202
OYYY VEY GOYIM ITS JUST A FEW SHEKELS
>>
>>67761152
>Coke
>verge of bankruptcy

Coke is one of things that never gonna get bankruptcy, everyone buy and drinks this shit, they get billons and billons of money every month
>>
i think sprint is pushing every last penny out they can on this series this year, thats why we are being blasted with sprint ads
>>
Are there normally a lot of wrecks in this race?
>>
Does Newman's scheme remind anyone else of Earnhardt's silver scheme he ran in '95?
>>
>>67761221
Miller lite like a true american
>>
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>>67761202
>mfw used to listen to Robby Gordon audio
>>
>>67761271

Like 1 a year
>>
>no boogity
>>
>no boggity
>>
>>67761221

Victory golden monkey and coronas. im pretty hammered after 5 of these golden monkeys- gotta admit. drinking coronas now.

>>67761257

i was being sarcastic in that first sentence. i was just making a commentary about our nice capitalist system. how coke can invest their profits into shit like this to cut down on their taxes and create more jobs.
>>
>>67761149
I'd say just a dick, but whatever at least I'm honest about it.
>>
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>>67761221
>>
>>67761224
i heard they censored it on the website since its a little delayed. like it would obviously cut out right before a f bomb. of course the scanner at the track is live and uncensored.
>>
Holy shit, leader doesn't have a 30 car advantage after a lap
>>
jgrwinslol
>>
>>67761317
>>67761319
DWmind
>>
why is biffle in last?
>>
Think of all the tight yoga pants Danica could buy is she won the million
>>
>>67761281
It's whiskey time...though I'm drinking Crown.
>>
>car 75

explain?
>>
>>67761336
Not sure about that

I hear F-bombs, sometimes the scanner stream is ahead of the broadcast

more often than not it's a little behind

Besides, they'd have to have 40 people monitoring 40 channels to censor like that

Perhaps the officials channel gets special treatment though, some of us pointed out a mysterious voice that called the "Duh Breeze" cautions the last couple seasons
>>
>>67761424
Gimmick number to celebrate M&M's 75th anniversary
>>
>>67761320
Golden Monkeys put me on my ass. Never been able to finish a six pack in one sitting.
>>
c l e a n a i r
l
e
a
n

a
i
r
>>
>Larson up 8 spots in 12 laps

holy shit that nip is impressive
>>
>>67761477
9.5% ABV will do that to you
>>
im trying to watch this game with my wife's son but he wants to watch the cavs-raptors game. Any ideas /sp/?
>>
>>67761522
memes :))
>>
>>67761477

I'm an alcoholic unfortunately, so i had to buy me a 6 pack of coronas to last the rest of the night too. I think the golden monkeys are better than drinking gin like i used to.
>>
>>67761522
Stop shitposting
>>
LEMME
GET
A
MCPICK
2
>>
Don't forget to put lemon spritz on your guac /sp/
>>
>>67761437
I always assumed the Drew Brees call came over a private channel we couldn't hear.
>>
>>67761221

I don't drink alcohol because i'm not a fucking degenerate
>>
>>67761540
>I think the golden monkeys are better than drinking gin like i used to.

You need to switch to a brown spirit at this point in your alcoholism anon

Scotch, Bourbon, Whiskey, or a barrel aged Tequila

Beer is a bad road to go down
>>
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strong 18th
>>
I thought they didn't limit pit road speed during the all star race.
>>
>>67761648
She actually looks cute in that picture.
>>
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>>67761570
>>
>>67761655
That's for Qualifying.
>>
>>67759807
Most middle class Americans with good credit could get one. Just saying.
>>
>>67761571
If you ever rent a scanner at the track there are 2 officials channels

Not sure why really. As I scan them both. One goes silent during the events

But a mysterious voice would pop up last year a lot of times before Hoots called a debris yellow

Usually, there is a driver or spotter report of debris followed by officials chatter as Hoots polls the officials on the ground around the track

The mysterious ones never had that chatter, just the mysterious voice

I assume it was Brian France
>>
>>67761615

I never liked brown liquor. gin and tonics are pretty much the only liquor i like. its a younique sort of road im on i suppose.
>>
They say there's all these cool pictures on lolgayno's car. From a distance it looks like Jackson Pollock splattered black ink randomly on the car.

It's a shitty paint job.
>>
>>67761570
hi jeb
>>
>DANICA BEING LAPPED
>>
>>67761700
Gin and tonics fucked my life up senpai

Good times

Good drink

I love me some Kettle and tonics or Sapphire and tonics
>>
>>67761648
>>
>>67761697
Lel brian france
>"Junior caution coming in 5 laps"
>>
>>67761745
WHO IS THIS SEMEN DEMON???
>>
>>67761697
lol
>>
NASCAR Coke Zero Cup Series 2017

SCREEN CAP THIS
>>
>tfw no clint bowyer audio to listen to

>WHAT HAPPENED
>>
>>67759807

>a liberal thinks if they had a loan for a million dollars they could turn it into a 10 billion dollar empire

do you really think a 1 million dollar loan is rare here? i think someone who can take that kind of loan and turn it into 10 billion dollars and a business that employs thousands is a genius. think of how many people here and how many small business here were able to get 1 million in financing.... none of those fuckers turned it into the trump empire kiddo. people refinance their homes every day for 400k and don't do shit with it.
>>
>>67761745
>ywn fuck Danica after a race when she's all hot and sweaty
>>
>>67761779
Coke Zero doesnt exists anymore, is Coke Black now
>>
>>67760492
Doubly cucked since bane and sniffle won.
>>
>>67761807
>coke got blacked
>>
>>67761740

i felt good about myself for not buying gin and tonic water this weekend, then i went and bought these golden monkeys. i guess thats still progress lol.
>>
>>67761807
Maybe where your from?
>>
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You have to hand it to this little bastard

You really do
>>
>patrick got the fan vote over diburrito

Still mad.
>>
what is the shortest NASCAR driver in any series?


Rico Abreau doesn't count, he's a legit midget
>>
>>67761540
I'm a bit of an alcoholic myself. Golden Monkeys are intense though. Strongest beer I've tried by a landslide.

You anons drinking Busch, Bud, or Miller aren't even drunk. You aren't elevated to a new plane of existence like you get from the Monkey.
>>
>>67761861
Danica
>>
>>67761861
Does Brad Sweet still count even though he hasn't been in a car in two years?
>>
>>67761856
>20th vs 19th
>>
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>>67761839
such a cuck face
>>
>>67761713
>It's a shitty paint job.
in general those sort of schemes don't look good
>>
>>67761832
they ratify coke, everything is only Coca-Cola label
>>
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>>67761894
A cuck face that gets all the prime pussy
>>
>>67761867

its totally a different drunk than beer. cause it just strikes all of a sudden.
>>
>>67761839
Who?
>>
>>67761867
>Golden Monkeys

What are these an IPA?

I've never seen them and I live in the US capitol of alcoholism
>>
inb4 cawshun
>>
>cuckboy
>>
>McFlurray
>>
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>>67761894
>cuck725
>>
>mcflurry
>>
>McFlurry
>>
Caution might Fuck up these put stops.... we'll see what the officials do.

>>67761861
Allgaier? It's him or Danica.
>>
>>67761930
Ricky Shithouse Jr.
>>
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when will kurt get a win
>>
KENSETH AN ABSOLUTE MADMAN
>>
>Kenseth
>>
>>67761894
you have a folder of over 700 cucks?
>>
>Kekseth
>>
>kenshit
>>
>one rule to follow
>the 20 team still fucks it up

Top lel
>>
Kenseth's luck is such shit
>>
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>All this strategy spaghetti
>>
>>67761915
It hits me after the fourth bottle. I'm shot after that.

>>67761932
It's a Belgian Tripel. Think three times stronger than an average beer. It's a unique drunk. Reminds me of the feeling I get when I simultaneously smoke weed and drink alcohol. The stuff fucks you up.
>>
>>67762054
fuck off with the anime

remember what board you're on
>>
Are only like the top 5 on the lead lap? hahaha fucking retard crew chiefs
>>
When do they actually start racing?
>>
>>67762141
Not until the last segment.
>>
what they won't show you right now is that they are all in line just outside of pit road doing a lugnet check

if they don't mention it I will post pics
>>
>>67762210
They showed it during the showdown
>>
What in the actual fuck is going on?
>>
>11 cars on the lead lap

hahahahah
>>
>Kissy
>>
why would you wait until the last 5 laps to pit when you have to pit again at the end of the stint?
>>
>>67762267
To start the second segment with essentially four fresh tires.
>>
>>67762267
2 tyres
>>
Matt's got a point.
>>
>Vortex THEORY
YOU FUCKING HEATHEN
>>
>vortex theory mentioned
>drink
>>
>>67762258
the last part of race will be a joke exepct if yellow happens and everyone gets LD
>>
>>67762278

But arent you switching all four tires and the pit stop before the next stint?
>>
>Kenseth
That was fucking cheeky m8
>>
Kasey gets up front and Nascar fucks him over with a runaway tire penalty. Did that actually happen? I missed it.
>>
lol they are all so fucking confused

Chase is pissed
>>
Incoming actions detrimental to stock car racing fine for Kenseth

>full moon
>>
>>67762306
If you switch two under green, and then two on pit road, you get off pit road faster and have better track position.
>>
based joy
>>
Dale Jr. bringing the toppest of keks
>>
>Dale
Ahahaha
>>
>>67762324
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA yfw this will actually happen
>>
Seriously what the fuck is going on
Does NASCAR even know what its own rules are?
>>
WATERCOLLER DALE
>>
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>>67761912
Yum
>>
>>67762334

How stupid of me, makes sense now
>>
Sorry this is late. Just got back.

>Kenseth
>>
>>67762363
The 1/5 mile kart track I used to race on had a tighter rules package.
>>
>nascar intellectuals
>>
congratulations nascar
you played yourself
>>
>Larry and Jeff calling out nascar on their bullshit

ACTIONS
>>
kys NASCAR
>>
brian france is worthless
>>
What tire, Larry? I'm lost.
>>
Welcome to NASCAR, where the rules are made up
>>
Are they literally making up the rules as they go?
>>
>>67762452
and the points don't matter
>>
NASCAR: We make up the rules as we go
>>
I am a smart man, but this shit is too fucked. I am so confused.
>>
Why not just make the purse at Charlotte $1 million and cut this confusion bullshit race?
>>
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>Benny Parson

I miss BP senpai
>>
I'm rooting for this spaghetti scenario
>>
holy shit harvick is died
>>
Chase Elliot will make the Hall of Fame if he wins tonight
>>
CAN SOMEONE TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON WITH THE NASCAR TIMING AND SCORING?
>>
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>All of these cars a lap down
>>
Half the fucking field is a lap down.
For shame, Brian France.
>>
They're still making up the rules during the actual race.
>>
>>67762536
i was talking about it
probably NASCAR gonna trown debies cautions to give lucky dogs for everyone -1
>>
>>67762628
>>67762615
Fucked up

What a shit show
>>
Not even sneak knows what's going on. This is some bullshit.
>>
inb4 cawshun
>>
>88 car isnt krispy kreme
>>
>>67762655
>>67762683
Weeper caution incoming
>>
>inb4 actual caution in about 1 minute
>>
commercial caution
>>
COMMERCIAL CAUTION
>>
>>67760645
>Sippy Cup
I want this so bad.
>>
Things I've learned tonight:
-My local 1/3 mile dirt ring has a better rules package than NASCAR during the All-Star race
-The vortex effect is only a theory
-Sprint spends more on marketing than on redundancy and QoS
>>
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>All this confusion

Terry Labonte wouldn't put up with this shit.
>>
>NASCAR in charge of remembering what its rules are

Also WATER COOLER DALE
>>
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>>67762728
>>
what a meme of a race
>>
chevorlet has the

VERY WORST

commercials
>>
So there's no wave around for the lap down cars since the first few cars didn't pit? Maybe? Brian?
>>
>>67762732
>My local 1/3 mile dirt ring has a better rules package than NASCAR during the All-Star race

this

I'm hating myself for staying home and not going to my local short track tonight

fuck this confusing shit
>>
do people actually eat M&Ms anymore?
>>
>What emoji would you use to describe this car

Fuck it, I was unironically born in le wrong generation.
>>
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>harvick ded

THANK YOU
>>
>>67762743
what the hell is this thing
>>
>>67762774
I did a few weeks ago.
They were very mediocre.
>>
>>67762757
NASCAR is the meme Racing
>>
>>67762774
Only in trail mix
>>
>>67762781
This is America's androgynous, pussified future.
>>
>>67762781
a liberal who makes sammiches
>>
>>67762766

>REAL PEOPLE NOT ACTORS

No wonder there are barely any Chevy's in Europe
>>
"i think something is broke on the 4 car, thats why the hood is up"

CAPTIAN OBVIOUS DARREL WALTRIP
>>
>Glad it's all sorted out now
huh
what resolved the issue of HALF THE FIELD BEING DOWN A LAP
>>
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>>67762792
>Sweet & Salty
>>
>>67762812
With brilliant observations such as that, it's no wonder he was able to win 84 races and 3 championships.

>Click verify once there are none left.
What in the fuck is this
>>
lo que es una carrera extraña hasta ahora

ni idea de quién va a ganar
>>
Does anyone literally have ANY IDEA what is happening?
I watch NASCAR a lot but this is a shitshow
>>
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A BRILLIANT RACE
>>
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Kyle Larson wins lol
>>
>>67762815

The format is ok, but kenseth not following literally the only rule fucked everyone over.

Those cars had to be a lap down cuz kenseth trapped them with stupidity.
>>
>>67762830
No. We don't know what's going on. The drivers don't know. Even NASCAR doesn't know.

This is hilariously fucked up.
>>
>>67762833
Can someone fill me in on this meme?
>>
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>mfw televised ARCA tomorrow from Toledo
>>
>more time has been taken to dry the track and screw around under caution than there's been actual racing

can't wait for that draw now
>>
Just give Jimmie or Kyle the win and move on to next week.
>>
>I'm gonna use my SPRINT phone to call siri
>>
>I'm gonna call Siri
>call Siri
>>
>nascar heat launches on my birthday
>>
>>67762849

NASCAR sorted it out just fine. The Fox announcers not understanding got everyone confused.

Kenseth never pitted so he trapped half the field a lap down. But was then held a lap for the penalty.
>>
>>67762863

yeah seriously, this is like what happens when you let /sp/ be race controllers
>>
>new NASCAR HEAT
>from same team of old ones

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
>>
>>67762857
Free live streaming for the people that don't get whatever channel the race is on.
>>
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>nascar heat
>>
>>67762848
>Those cars had to be a lap down cuz kenseth trapped them with stupidity.
I think you have it right if Kenseth wasn't an idiot we wouldn't be in this situation.
>>
>sneak
>>
Maximum spaghetti
>>
what the fuck is it now
>>
Thanks Chase.
>>
OH SHIT GUYS WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING
>>
>>67762854
Dave Moody is a gigantic NASCAR shill
>>
>>67760591
>He can't into Nationwide.
>>
SMOKE UP IN SMOKE
>>
???
>>
SMOKE NO!
>>
Is Chase literally retarded?
>>
oooh. Stewart's going to feel that one tomorrow.
>>
based brian france
>>
>Implying that wasn't just Stewart smoking brisket and sausage
>>
Yeah, okay, Kenseth's done. I finally have a good excuse to not watch this circus anymore. Goodnight /sp/.
>>
>>67762960
YES
>>
CHASE BTFO EVERYONE

GET WRECKED OLDFAGS
>>
>NASCAR Heat is back


YOU BETTER FUCKING GET BESTWICK TO DO IT YOU MOTHER FUCKERS
>>
>Kenseth fucks half the field over then wrecks
MAN OH MAN WHAT A WILD NIGHT
>>
>sodacookies
>>
harvick what the fuck
>>
>>67762974
b..but...who's going to make the next thread?
>>
>>67763006
Make Sneak do it
>>
>danica made it
>>
STUD
T
U
D
>>
Bayne crashing this field
>>
>>67763006
le tripfags
>>
>i don't know what's going on
We're right with you Chad
>>
>>67763034
>cue butthurt danica fans bringing up this race for the next ten years if anyone says anything bad
>>
>Greg Olsen

How come black people tried to make the Panthers about themselves when Olsen and Kuechly are white as snow?
>>
why the fuck are they counting caution laps during the all-star race?

why is there a mandatory pit stop under green when there's also a mandatory pit stop between segments?

why does nascar always try to make things so stupid?

I know it's just the all-star race but this is just fucking dumb.
>>
Greg Olsen is actually pretty good. "People are punting on second down"
>>
why don't they just use the same system that they always have?
>>
Damn, Sodacookies is pissed. Not that I don't blame him.
>>
>I don't know how the hell they've officiated this thing from start to finish

What did he mean by this?
>>
NASCAR BLOWN THE FUCK OUT
>>
>that commentator silence

based stewart bringing the bantz
>>
i still think of biffle when i see 3m
>>
>>67763124

The system has changed every year for like 15 years
>>
>tony calling nascar out

RUH ROH
>>
The Smoke is ACRID!
>>
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F I N E S
I
N
E
S
>>
>>67763124
Because there's 50 of them

I love this though, based Brad probably thought this up when he was drunk as fuck
>>
>>67762900
DMI is making the new one; Eutechnix made the last few.
>>
Why is everyone so confused? Tony was a lap down cuz kenseth trapped him there. This really isn't that complicated.
>>
Based Tony
>>
Holy shit Smoke is headed to the hauler after that interview.

Since every driver is going to be negative about this race, will fines even be issued?
>>
>>67763166
>Kevin Harvcuck
>>
H A U L E R
A
U
L
E
R
>>
>gonna pit
>merrr maybe not
chase just wanted to watch the world burn
>>
NO INSULTING THE FUHRER, TONY!
>>
>>67763179
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8sDBe6typj0
>>
>>67763160
yes
DMI is doing with old NASCAR heat team
>>
this is tony's last year, he don't give a fuck
>>
>>67763166
YOU JUST KNOW
>>
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>>67763139
>>67763143
>>67763147
Fuck yeah. He sucks in terms of results lately but by god, he's got to be the most successful non-fake sports personality ever. I love his honesty.
>>
>CHASE NEARLY BECOMES JPM JR
>>
Chase pls
>>
lelliot
>>
CHASE ALMOST PULLED A FUCKING MONTOYA BUT WE'D ALL HAVE SEEN IT LIVE
>>
>chase trying to impersonate JPM
>>
>Chase almost Montoya'd
>>
>Sneak
>>
ABSOLUTE MADMAN ABSOLUTE MADMAN ABSOLUTE MADMAN ABSOLUTE MADMAN ABSOLUTE MADMAN ABSOLUTE MADMAN

IM A NEW CHASE FAN
>>
WEW
E
W

CHASE
>>
>>67762900

THEY ARE WORKING WITH MONSTER GAMES
>>
>Chess channeling his inner Montoya
>>
>>67763226
dat bee rayciss
>>
this race has fucking everything

What are the chances of a caution in the last 13 laps giving the 12th place car a win?
>>
>chase trying to outdo JPM
>>
MONTOYA POSSESSED CHESS FOR A BRIEF MOMENT
>>
D-did somebody hand out crazy pills or something?
>>
>>67763235
how you know why i keep cheering with 24

CHASE IS THE NEW FACE OF NASCAR
>>
Chase shit the bed.

>>67763107
Funniest analogy I've heard in a while. Probably because I've heard so many basketball, hockey and baseball references lately.
>>
>Chase trying to kill himself on live TV

MY SIDES
>>
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YEAH KURT WE WEREN'T GOING TO TALK ABOUT IT
>>
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>>67763217
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VseH8mZCksc
>>
>>67763166
wtf? is smoke banging delana in exchange for kevin's car?
>>
>>67763272
Chase always looks so depressed
>>
This is the dumbest race I've seen in a while, but it's also by far the most entertaining race I've seen in a while.
>>
>>67763205
OH SHIT
I did not know that.
>>
Chase IN 2ND
>>
SNEAK WE NEED A NEW THREAD
>>
>KRYLE
>>
>Kyle
>>
KRYLE
>>
>>67763301
It's interesting to note that, by around 2000, his dad always looked like he'd rather be anywhere in the world than the racetrack

>KRYLE
GET FUCKED CHAMP*
>>
>>67763317
you must've missed the end of last week's race or the first and 3rd segments of the showdown earlier today
>>
>Cryle
>>
>Kyle Busch speeding in pits [X]
>>
>kylel
>>
>mcshitty
>>
NEW THREAD

>>67763372
>>67763372
>>67763372
>>
>>67763317

Its great because the optimum strategy complete flip flops ever time there's an incident.
>>
File: bill-elliott.jpg (52KB, 180x248px) Image search: [Google] [Yandex] [Bing]
bill-elliott.jpg
52KB, 180x248px
>>67763353
They almost look the same.
>>
Don't forget that based Chase endorses Trump
>>
Lel Jimmie
>>
Man I have no idea wtf is going on,

This fucking shit sucks,
>>
>Jimmie Johnson Invitational Race
>>
So....uh.....what the fuck.....
>>
hahaha get fucked jimmies
>>
Caution will fuck Larson....
Thread replies: 540
Thread images: 70
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