Ignoring all of your academic accomplishments and what others think of you...
who actually thinks they are stupid here and good at just hiding the fact you're an idiot?
I don't mean the "I'm actually smart but I'll be humble and pretend I'm stupid" card but actual honest to goodness you are convinced you are a retard and have no idea how you made it as far as you have.
Even though I have a degree in an STEM field I convinced myself I know nothing and feel utterly retarded.
>>7998015
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Impostor_syndrome
>>7998016
this hit so deep i could barely muster up anything to reply with. i'm not going to say much other than thanks. im going to relax and sleep
>>7998031
Thanks man. I needed those words.
>>7998015
the world is a predatory and unjust place. bad guys win sometimes, the mediocre can soar off of shear luck.
just roll with it. do the best you can, and try to be a decent person so if you fail, you won't be a friendless cocksucker AND a failure.
>>7998016
>People who have reportedly experienced the syndrome include screenwriter Chuck Lorre,[6] best-selling writer Neil Gaiman,[7] best-selling writer John Green, comedian Tommy Cooper,[8] business leader Sheryl Sandberg, US Supreme Court justice Sonia Sotomayor,[9] and actress Emma Watson.[10]
These people all fucking suck and deserve to feel like frauds
>>7998015
When you talk to someone who genuinely cares about their major more than you do and you feel really dumb because they know shit like it's the back of their hands.
I feel like I'm motivated, but significantly less motivated than them. I'm not spending every hour of my free time reading scientific papers or cutting edge physics research. I'll watch a video occasionally. If I want to learn something, I'll try looking up multiple resources for the topic. But I dunno, it feels like it doesn't "stick" as well now. Maybe I read it but I don't understand it. I think I've read up on the singlet and triplet five times and I STILL don't understand what they are. I feel stupid and unaccomplished, and my near-straight B average since I started upper division physics courses shows it.
>>7998015
I feel like this all the time, in a top level chemistry graduate program... then I talk to some of my peers and realize everyone else is just as fucking stupid as I am
I've been working professionally as a software engineer writing stuff in C-family languages for over a year now and I get this feeling all the time. It's like deep down, I can't accept that I am in fact a software engineer and a peer among my colleagues. I wish it'd go away, it's not needed at all.
>>7998015
Well, I'm doing a double major in math and computer science, so even though I feel that I'll only be a failure in math that accomplishes nothing worthwhile, I also get to see all those other computer science majors, and that makes me feel not so pathetic by comparison. That's how I cope, at least.
>>7998015
got the opposite problem tbqh
I have a growing opinion of myself that shows no sign of diminishing as every time so far an opportunity has come for me to be exposed as a fraud I've pulled through with flying colours.
I'm just waiting for something to finally come and knock me on my arse.
>tfw left all revision last year to one day before the exams
>btfo the exams
>tfw doing the same again
>desperately hoping I haven't completely btfo myself this time and will be able to pull through
>>7998015
>tfw projected completion date for thesis has to be pushed back again
Yeah I'm a fucking retard alright. I'm so fucking pissed at myself
>>7998049
>tfw
i've had a 85-95% average since high school and it's continued into college
I feel like i care enough to not want shitty grades but not enough to care about what I'm learning
I cheat constantly too. Not on exams and I usually make sure I know how to do something but I always fucking cheat.
>>7998015
I don't think I'm good at hiding it.
>>7998047
>Emma Watson
>accomplished
>>7998015
This. I never did any work at school and barely attended, for reasons I won't go into, so I flunked out with terrible grades. I mean really bad grades, a G grade in gcse maths, for example. It took a while to get my shit together, but I've been attending night school for maths and physics and have achieved top marks consistently. Yet I can't draw any satisfaction from it. I can't shake the thought that it's just incredibly easy or I'm just getting lucky, or both.
Not a good feeling, so I try not to think about it.
>>7998016
I've never been so happy to learn about a disorder.
Stay strong OP, I feel you bro.
>>7998195
No that's the same problem.
>>7998016
>never achieved anything in my life
>still feel like an impostor
I feel like I shouldn't exist
>>7998047
This right here
Especially sotomayor
Naw I'm legit smart. I think I might have made myself dumber by hiding my powerlevel for so long, however.
>get picked on for be that kid who always raised his hand in grade school
>parents eventually move for work
>pretend to be normie the rest of my school career, even through uni
>no one knows I was a straight A student
>>7998015
sounds like somebody went to grad school
>>7999528
It shouldn't be called imposter syndrome when you ACTUALLY haven't done anything worthwhile in your life.
It should be called "justified low self-esteem".
>>7998373
>again
Senpai...
>>7998016
Wtf man. Wtf. This explains so much. I am nearly done with my BSC and often think it's just because of the help of others or because supervisors are helpful but never because I studied etc.
Holy fucking shit man
>>7998015
I think everyone is an idiot including myself excluding a handful of genuinely brilliant people (maybe 1k in number). I just don't think humans overall are as smart as we'd like to think.
I don't think of myself as very smart at all. I'm just curious and very hard working. In college I had a reputation as the weird but really smart guy. People were always bugging me for homework help etc. The thing that struck me was how little effort people put into their work, yet from their perspective they were busting their ass. There were projects where I would put in 8 hours or more, yet people would come to me after only spending an hour on their project, yet whine about how hard it was.
I've never personally met anyone who I would consider a genius, but I do think they are out there.
>>7998015
It's not that I'm convinced I'm retarded, it's that I know I am. All of my success can be attributed to learning for the moment, and then forgetting the information later on. Programming and biology aren't difficult subjects, especially when you learn enough to sound like you know what you're doing. Also, I struggle with math, and my IQ is average at best.
That being said, it's worked for me this whole time, but now I'm waiting for a reply from my PhD program, I think my luck has finally ran out.
>>8000139
This is more plausible if brilliant is defined as
>necessary for legitimate progress
>>7998015
Me. I literally don't understand anything. All A's but I do everything by rote and following patterns.
I study for the tests, get good grades, and then forget everything once the semester is over. People tell me I'm smart but I just can't feel it.
