God this is tough...it just hit me robots. No woman will ever find me attractive.
Have any of you given up on the possibility of ever dating women? What's it like, what's to expect?
J U S T
U
S
T
b urself
>>28522299
just fuck yourself.
>>28522299
Yep, I'm better off without 'em.
It's all about accepting it and moving on. Find better things to do that will reward you instead of penalizing you.
The secret to becoming not miserable by this society-based problem is to remove it from your self-values. Easier said than done. It takes a lot of rationalizing and focus. Even then it can ensue again because it's a biological need, but so long as you can drag yourself out of it again you'll be better off.
With how women act in relationships these days, do you really think they could fulfill your needs? My dad learned this lesson after his second current marriage with my stepmom. She doesn't fuck him for months, spewing "it's not just about sex" bullshit. She doesn't even clean herself. I got to hear about how he had to put up with the smell of unwashed ass while he barely got the chance to fuck her. I got to hear all about how my mom would rather masturbate in the shower rather than fucking my dad. I provide more emotional support than either of them did just by being willing to listen to his problems.
That is a future you do not want. Even dying alone is a cleaner, more dignified prospect.
>>28522299
I am 32 and I finally gave up on ever getting a gf.
Strangely I think it made me more confident. Like it's one less thing in life to worry about.
>>28522299
dude seriously?
i was 10 years old when i realized i wasnt going to get a gf. never will. ive been at peace ever since.
>>28523224
Same bro, around 11-12 I knew how women saw me, so i avoided a lot of the beta white knight phase, it wasn't until 17 i just figured its pointless trying to get with girls
>>28522299
>Have any of you given up on the possibility of ever dating women? What's it like, what's to expect?
Most of the time I feel like I've given up, but I still think that maybe if I got into social situations where I could meet girls and get to know them then something could happen. I have no ways of achieving that, though. Getting a job would be too hard for me now and I don't know any other ways to create a social circle after graduating HS.
>>28522299
I've given up, but unlike >>28523030
>>28523224 I haven't completed the acceptance phase. Once that is completed I feel like will be much better. Whenever the biological urge for companionship rises, the emptiness is quite uncomfortable and consequently panic attacks I could do without. Cannot wait for acceptance.
>>28522299
I realized that when I was like 16, and gave up on ever trying, but somehow got a girl when I was 24 by luck
>>28522299
I've accepted it long ago. On some days it surfaces and it bothers me, but I manage to suppress it everytime.
That's just how life is.
>>28523609
>>28523030 here
As I said, it's nearly impossible to fully accept. Even I succumb to crying fits if I linger too much on it. The difference is that I can get over it and keep moving, remembering what people are like.
When I have moments of weakness, it is from being unloved. I can jack off however much I like but that feeling of wanting love will never completely fade. I can only pursue other things to take my mind off of it.
So it's not a question of if you can completely remove the biological need, it's how fast you can console the fact with yourself and continue to pursue the things you enjoy. I had a solid six months where it ate me up and eventually my mind wandered from it. The worst thing you can do is hang around influences that make you linger on the fact.
go to a strip club and practice talking to girls there. They will want your money so they'll pretend to be interested in what you say. but remember youre not obliged to give them anything. they'll leave if you don't give them money after a few minutes but in that time you practice talking to them until you can talk to girls without being nervous or weird
Guys that have given up, did you pursue less desirable women such as fat girls, crazy girls, single mom's, extremely ugly, or disfigured girls, before completely giving up? Or did you just try for normal qt girls before giving up?
>>28524073
I didn't even try at all before I gave up
>>28524145
This to be honest.
I was already friendless anyway so I figured I would be too much of a social fuckup to be desirable.
>>28524145
>>28524219
This
>>28524073
Never tried, although I got friendzoned many times (even while I didn't try). Yes, literally "oh anon we are best friends forever!" by my crush who ended up dating asshole Chad.
>>28524219
same, but eventually tried online dating when I was like 25 or something. pretty bad experience for the most part cause I only got a few dates after a whole year and barely anyone answered my messages but I did eventually get a gf, so giving up doesn't neccesarilly mean you cant try again later
>>28524381
Forgot to add that she ended up becoming a total slut with bipolar disorder + attention whoring. Didnt miss out on anything it seems :^)
>>28524073
Single moms have turned me down. Once I met and hung out with a crazy fembot girl. I kissed her and it turned out that she had not brushed her teeth for an entire year, and that was the straw that broke the camel's back for me to be honest.
At some point you realize that it is best to give up.
>>28522299
>Have any of you given up on the possibility of ever dating women? What's it like, what's to expect?
It's a curious thing, really. I've been told by other men my age that in time the hurt that comes with this fades, that you finally find peace. And yet I find this hard to believe. Perhaps it's because we can never truly look around our own corner, and I can only understand it through the lens of my own experience.
To be desired by a woman is a need that Mother Nature places within you. You've never asked for it, of course, and yet you find it dwelling inside of you like some sort of alien spirit. It's distinct from you, and yet intimately tied to you. You nurture it with every breath and heart beat, and you walk lockstep into old age together.
After years of seeing nothing but disgust in the eyes of women who meet your gaze, that spirit of Nature gets sick. It becomes hobbled, warped, as ugly as its host. In time, it becomes desperate and angry. It isn't anger at women; the anger is far less defined, directed, or articulate. It's just blind, idiot frustration. It's just the gibbering of something that never learned what it is to be human.
So you do what you can to keep that ugly little demon tame. You drink too much, or abuse drugs. The former has been my attempt at something like a solution.
But of course it will always be with you. There will be moments when even the liquor can't lull it into a stupor, moments during those long, lonely nights when it finally speaks to you.
If only it spoke as people do! Perhaps if it did, those long nights wouldn't be quite so lonely.
>>28522299
No. One day I will be strong and beautiful. Women will have no choice bit to be attracted to my body and I can lavish them with this kindness and love that has been repressed in me for 20 years
>>28525776
Wow...I would like to have your optimism.
>>28525776
Strength and beauty will only mask what you seek to hide away by gaining it. I speak from my own experience. Social grace and charisma will carry you much further and learning to remain human. Always keep a healthy interest in women and get the fuck off of here. Otherwise they'll be able to sense it and smell it. Its not something you can easily shake once its there.
>>28525692
How old were these men you spoke with?
>After years of seeing nothing but disgust in the eyes of women who meet your gaze, that spirit of Nature gets sick. It becomes hobbled, warped, as ugly as its host. In time, it becomes desperate and angry. It isn't anger at women; the anger is far less defined, directed, or articulate. It's just blind, idiot frustration. It's just the gibbering of something that never learned what it is to be human.
I hate so much that I can relate to this.
>tfw women actively pause in your presence as if faced with some wild and standoffish beast before hurrying past you as if you'll lunge out and bite them in an instant.
>tfw they no longer make eye contact and make a slightly held back audible sound if they do.
No matter what your situation is, there is someone of the opposite gender in the same one. You will never date a 10/10, but you can find an average-looking girl whose features appeal to your specific tastes who will date you if you can get yourself to a point where you believe you're worth dating. If you don't love yourself, your mirror-situation girl will also be someone who doesn't love themself and think they're worth dating, and people like that won't find each other or be able to connect.
>>28526644
>How old were these men you spoke with?
Wizards like myself. Virgins in their thirties. There aren't many of us, to be sure. For most men that spirit of Nature is more angel than demon, but there are tiny number of exceptions. Men like me do exist, sadly enough.
The thing of it is, I'm always skeptical of those men my age who claim to have transcended those instincts and impulses, are no longer bothered by the fact they have never been given license to live as most men live, to experience what most men experience and many take for granted.
However, perhaps I'm the odd one. I certainly can't say for sure either way. I can only speak for myself, and yet I suspect I'm not unique among the wizards. A wizard may be a monster, but even we monsters are subject to Mother Nature. The fact that she hates us makes little difference; we are still her children.
Not even a wizard can kill a goddess.
>>28526722
Oh that's rich lad. I wouldn't date someone who mirrors my r9k posting habits.
>>28526924
That's the problem. If you wouldn't date someone who's like you, you don't deserve to date someone.
>>28526957
Neither does my mirror image.
Take THAT mirror faggot.
>>28526722
I actually think about this a lot.
If the whole "There's someone out there for you who loves you for whom you are :)))" meme is true, then I will never meet her. Even if she's not a shut in, she knows she will never find me, and if we do meet, nothing will happen.
>but the chemistry meme!
Not all elements react. We are the Nobel gasses. We exist alone and have accepted that fact. Some Nobel gasses can form bonds, but they are weak and easily broken despite needing tremendous energy to form.
>>28526899
I don't want to kill the goddess I just want the suffering to stop.
I wish I could accept my position. I'm completely done with women, and as done as is possible while still surviving with people in general.
The loneliness hurts, even though I know the cure hurts more and never lasts.
I've mostly given up on pursuing relationships. I've been in two and looking back at them I only feel disgusted by myself. Flirting makes me sick.
Especially seeing other people flirt and make cutesy jokes with each other, it's so obvious how meaningless everything they're saying to each other is. They could say it to anybody, because they're not speaking from the heart, they're following the script of "being flirty."
I'd rather be the truest version of myself than in love.
>>28527103
You're right, but it does mean it's in your hands: if you become determined enough to stop being a shut-in and open yourself to finding that connection, your mirror girl is now someone from a similar background who has done the same thing. You just have to find it within yourself.
>>28527333
How trite. People like us never change fundamentally. Not to mention the supposed road to the "mirror girl" is riddled with other girls which means we would be able to meet failure after failure and is only able to fulfill itself properly after a stupid amount of effort and non-guaranteed success.
If I had a mirror image girl I wouldn't put her through the useless efforts. That's just cruel and unusual punishment.
>>28527424
>>28527424
People definitely can and do change fundamentally. Having a toxic environment which continually reinforces each others' self-prophesized doom doesn't help, of course, but while many who live the miserable existence of a robot may not find a way out, many will and do. You're always going to see more failure stories than success stories for change because the success stories generally take themselves away from places like this.
If you are determined only to act on the guarantee of success with minimal effort, you're right, there's no hope. You would have to open yourself to the willingness to fail repeatedly, because that's the only way to get anywhere in life for anyone.
>>28527547
Nigger I have done this shit for well over 20 years and I can't even make one friend. Nobody who is sane would repeat the same shit with the same failures. A logical person would do something more productive with their time.
Just as my attempts to be social have failed repeatedly, so has my will to continue trying. Why bother if I'm not learning or gaining anything but a bleaker worldview and a reinforced confirmation bias?
>open yourself to the willingness to fail repeatedly
I have and it got me nowhere. Just like it got many others in this wretched cesspit nowhere.
Fuck off with your normalfag optimistic crap. If I wanted to hear your bullshit I would go to /soc/ like the other members of the thundercock family. Or outside again. Your lack of empathy sickens me.
>>28527333
I do force myself to socialize, despite using every excuse I can to avoid it. I can talk to people just fine, women included. I am, however, done going up to people and trying to make random conversation. I'm 27. I've spent enough time playing the song and dance ritual that >>28527243 described, and I've accepted that I won't be accepted.
If there is someone out there for me, this mirror person has been through the same shit, which means that person has moved on, too. I'm INFP, so I have always had these wild fantasies of meeting that person. I'm also not an idiot. I know the difference between fantasy and reality.
>>28527424 isn't me, but he's not entirely wrong. Some of us are destined to be alone.
>>28522299
I'm pretty atypical and spend almost all my time alone by choice, but this is my take on it.
Sex and interactions with girls are really not that fantastic or life changing/affirming. You guys who have never experienced these things greatly inflate them in your mind and that's totally understandable. Your biology is screaming at you to fuck and find 'love' and reproduce.
Fucking a hot girl is fun but if I knew I'd never do it again, I'd be fine with that. Girls are just icing on the cake of life. I'll spare you any more psycho analytical bullshit but a lack of success with women is probably not the cause of your anguish but rather another symptom.
>>28527617
>>28527617
Repeating the same shit with the same failures means you need to (radically) alter your approach and perspective, not that the task is impossible.
On this board, you are surrounded with people who you choose to socialize with stuck in the same circumstances as you. Would it be so impossible for some of them to be your friends if you happened to know them in the real world instead of posting online? The goal isn't necessarily to make friends with normies, but to find people like you in some way you can talked to about shared circumstances or interests - that's what friends basically are.
>>28527729
Yeah except these people are in the same situation. We don't go out because normal people go out. We don't socialize. We communicate through elaborately-crafted shitposts and meme hard between legit discussions. To meet in real life would also negate the anonymous factor which brings us all comfort. It's why offline meetups are fucking weird the majority of the time when everyone is some form of introverted robot. Because if I wanted to meet the people that suffer they would have to go outside. It's a mutual virtual-only society of memeing wojack and frogposters.
So by virtue of the culture and the medium of communication, it is impossible. It's common sense. We're just as inclusive as normal people are. Normal people are brought together by how much they enjoy each other. We're brought together by how much we've suffered.
>>28527680
As a KHV, I agree. I've heard nothing but horror stories from most people I know about their girlfriend/wife. Funny enough, my mom and my little brothers fiance are really the only exceptions. It's not just stories, though. I've seen it first hand.
On too or that, I honestly can't imagine living with someone who wants to interact constantly. I've been alone for so long that the thought just sounds annoying as hell.
>>28522299
stop expecting
>>28527834
So you could start socializing with similar people online in a similar but non-anonymous setting (not nearly as much as a leap), then progress to instant messages, then to voice chat... eventually you might find through experience greater comfort in the company of others to the point where you can be comfortable with friends in the real world. As an extremely awkward teenager this was basically my trajectory.
>>28527834
Dude... You sound like you're 16 and trying to weave adult words into your angsty teenage rants about how much people just don't get it. You cling to the idea of being this edgy loner, which makes you sound like a fedora sperging about atheism.
>we're brought together by how much we've suffered
Suffered how?
By being alone?
Introverts actually enjoy being alone. I know I do.
Suffered from anxiety by doing a thing in public? Suffered rejection?
Suffered what exactly?
Before you get on my case about being a normie, let me give you a quick run down.
I'm a 27khv working a shitty 2nd shift job suffering from diagnosed major depression that's lasted the better part of my life. My shitty apartment is a mess because I can't find the will to clean it. I haven't payed my rent yet because the place I usually go to get money orders is down, and I haven't brought myself to get to the other store less than a mile away because apparently, that's too fucking difficult for me right now. Why? Fuck if I know.
I was bullied from kindergarden though 7th grade, then I changed schools and was utterly ignored. What few friends I had back then haven't spoken to me in several years, and the people I occasionally play MtG with frequently forget to invite me to play. When I do get invited, it takes me 2 hours of putzing around before I work up the nerve to go out and play some fucking cards. Sometimes, I don't even respond and instead stay in bed for another 6 hours doing nothing because it seems like a better plan.
>>28528346
Suffering being a general term. You shouldn't be this clueless if you've browsed this board for more than 2 hours (and this is being generous) to notice that there are a wide variety of problems people here complain over.
>introverts enjoy being alone
Not all introverts do. Sure introverts can enjoy being alone but introverts also enjoy socializing to various extents. It just drains them.
The extroverted have no actual reason for being here, given this board's reputation.
>angsty teenage rants
>implying my rants have nothing to do with you
You are exactly the kind of person that fits into my "edgy rants." If anything, you've only reinforced my point.
>>28528334
What part of anonymous culture don't you understand? People put names on and it becomes obnoxious memeing due to it taking place out of the board. People keep it here and it's fine. These wretched people like us don't go out. It's like I'm talking to a brick wall.
>>28528706
It's like you're reading from a cue card.
You know how I know you're just a teen? You're trying to identify yourself as an idea or a group rather than accepting what you are.
There is no sense talking to you anymore because you won't listen anyway. I'll even give you 2hat you want:
Congratulations? You've won an argument on the 4chan! You're right! You're a piece of shit just like everyone else! You sure showed me!
>>28529016
Fuck are you talking about? You think I don't know that I'm just some schmuck on a russian oil drumming board?
>that passive aggressive bullshit last sentence
Fuck off with that weak shit. If you aren't going to actually debate me then don't bother replying. If anything you're even more of a piece of shit for giving such a passive-aggressive response.
Why the fuck should you care about woman? They are selfish vile creatures. Unless you are a wealthy chad or a rich as fuck guy they wont ever deem you ""worthy"".
They can only communicate through mindgames that normies label 'the game' which is literally just the term for fucking with you and making you feel bad. If you even think a woman can love you, youre fucking wrong. If they cant gain from it then they'll just move on.
Tinder is the perfect example if how woman work, they'll swipe everyone to yes and ignore them all and cherry pick the best and most promising. They dont care about whats on the inside of you, the only inside they care about is that of your wallet.
TLDR; get over it, woman are shit
