Why do relationships have to be so painful and boring?
All you do is spend money on some other person and pretend to love them just so you won't be alone.
But is it worth it? The not being alone?
>>28391390
not quite my tempo guy
meanie
I dunno I feel like plenty of people would be happier but relationships are horrible business and legal arrangements now and it just sucks all the life out of them.
>>28391390
No it's not worth it.
I broke up with my girlfriend a few months ago, and I have no regretted it for one second. I have actually been 200% happier than when I was dating her.
I love not having to answer to anybody. I love doing anything I want and not regarding anybody's feelings ever. I love not having to make plans, come up with date ideas, not be entertaining, spend all of my money on myself, not shower for 2 days, not think about the relationship, not wonder why she was acting weird, not have to put up with passive aggressive behavior.
I fucking love being single. I will only date somebody again if I meet someone who is nearly identical to myself.
>>28391820
You're exactly where I was a few months ago. Then I met someone exactly me and wouldn't ya know it. It still fell apart. Take from that what you will.
>>28391390
no. you will always resent what you have and desire what you do not. It's just human nature.
I'm not quite sure anymore. I love my boyfriend but as a previous poster mentioned, you don't have freedom and there's all sorts of passive-aggressive behavior that stems from both sides. We are getting along great at the moment... because we're not spending much time together and have conflicting schedules. He plays league all the time and I stay at my mom's for hours after work because of this. I know he doesn't actually want to spend time with me, he has to force himself to.
We're also both mentally unstable. I have anxiety issues and spergy behavior(it's really obvious that I have problems...mannerisms,ect. ), he's bipolar and easily angered.
I'm 23 at this point, I don't want to leave him but at the same time I am unhappy.
I can't make him want to watch movies with me. :(
I kind of just expect him to leave me... because I'm not going to, I love him. Even though I think he'd be happier without me.
>>28394087
Why do you love him?
>>28394151
Because of little stuff he does, and when he's nice to me.He likes to cuddle a lot when he isn't playing league. We've been together almost 3 years now, even after a lot of bad things happened.
>>28391390
Buddy, if your relationships are painful AND boring - there are negatives (or atleast negatives that aren't massively outweighed by the goodparts) - then you're doing it wrong. For you it probably is better to be alone, but I've never been in a relationship with a girl I didn't absolutely enjoy spending time with.
>>28391820
That just sounds like a shit relationship bruh
>I love not having to answer to anybody.
I don't know what sort of messed up relationship you were in but I can't imagine "having to answer" to my gf - just don't date controlling bitches
>love doing anything I want and not regarding anybody's feelings ever.
Eh, I don't do everything I want and I definitely pay attention after her feeling but I don't really see that as a bad thing. Anything I didn't do because of te relationship wasn't worth much because otherwise I'd end the relationship so I could've done it.
>I love not having to make plans, come up with date ideas, not be entertainiI ng
Don't understand - planning cool/cute things for us to do together was one of my favourite ways to distract myself through boring lectures. As for being entertaining, what do you mean? It's not like you have to thing of shit to do to entertain a gf, you just go out/stay in and do things you both enjoy together.
>spend all of my money on myself
But relationships are financially even these days - that's what feminism's done. Seriously, who doesn't split dates these days? And I reckon she paid way more for presents during the relationship than I did.
>not shower for 2 days
Eww
>Not think about the relationship
Isn't thinking about the relationship, daydreaming about what you'll do in the future, reminiscing about what you've done in the past - isn't that nice?
>Not wonder why she was acting weird, not have to put up with passive aggressive behavior.
Just relax man.Don't overthink things, or find a better gf if she's actually weird and passive aggressive all the time.
>>28391820
If your particular relationship was this bad, I'm happy for you that you ended it.
Though if you need a girlfriend to make plans and shower, you probably aren't reay to have one anyways.
>>28394087
>won't watch movies with you
even if he gets to choose the film sometimes?
>tfw people think having money is all in life
>tfw they have a sense of superiority just because they make more money at the end of the month
>tfw all they wanna do/their all purpose in life is buy things and brag about them
>tfw this kind of persons are completely empty inside and have zero interest whatsoever in any subject/topic in the world
>tfw money ruined it all
>>28394087
>>28394403
Nobody gives a shit you fucking whore. You obviously have no self-respect if you've been with a complete loser who treats you like shit for so long. Get out
>>28394878
I don't think you belong here, bucko
>>28397189
>>tfw people think having money is all in life
What else is there?
![[HorribleSubs] Netoge no Yome wa Onnanoko ja Nai to Omotta - 01 [720p].mkv_snapshot_10.32_[2016.05.05_23.45.18].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/B3k1PfR.jpg "[HorribleSubs] Netoge no Yome wa Onnanoko ja Nai to Omotta - 01 [720p].mkv_snapshot_10.32_[2016.05.05_23.45.18].jpg")
All of the girls I have been with have left me, I never wanted to be apart from them. I'm too desperate for love, for validation, for admiration, for the power and the sex. I feel useless having no one that I can make happy in the most ultimate way. I feel like a failure for having failed so hard that they hate me now. I'm so clingy and jealous I wish I could find a girl who doesn't want other friends and is happy to have only me. I want someone who will work hard to show me that they care, and I would do anything for them.
>>28394087
I kinda know this feel.
With my relationship, I have the opposite role than you. Sometimes I feel like my bf is like a pet cat, and whenever I try and do something that I want to do, that he doesn't want to do, he will impede me from doing so by demanding that I pay attention to him instead. Another thing is that I have to ask permission for 'nights off' from seeing him, because it is implied that we will see each other everyday. Also he shit-tests me and starts arguments all the time. I find myself saying 'yes dear' all of the time, and finding the adage 'happy wife happy life' very accurate in describing my situation. I don't give my boyfriend enough attention, and when my bf is needy, he becomes annoying, and that makes me less thrilled about giving him attention.
A breakup is inevitable, he just started seding me angry texts while I was typing this post. Oh well, can't be helped etc.
>>28397486
Not that guy, and this may come as a surprise to you, but there are actually other categories in life more important than money, particularly good health, which entails a healthy, gratifying social life.
Money is VERY IMPORTANT. It is a central category of life, yes, it's true. Also, lecturing poor NEETs that money isn't as important as xyz isn't likely to register with them, since they're only focused on themselves are unwilling/unable to get outside of themselves for a discussion, and consider other categories in life. But it's still true that money isn't the single most important thing.
Someone who actually kinda likes the work that they do and is compensated comfortably for it (or has the free time to pursue hobbies he cares about), is in many cases happier than the guy who made the mistake of studying something that he actively hates/doesn't care about, and ONLY does it ONLY to get the money. The latter resents his job to a special degree that many don't, because his whole life, his whole education etc, has been bound up in this thing that he just went along with ONLY to get the money. Sure sure, he may be comfy. My point is that he has a different set of problems which money hasn't alleviated, for him.
Also look up the studies which indicate that among a sample, above a certain salary/life savings, happiness doesn't increase.
Other things that I would generally suggest are more important than money are good health, a genuinely gratifying social life (whatever that means to you), and not being miserable on a daily basis.
I've read enough realistic-sounding posts from anons on here who claim to be rich by r9k standards, and they often don't have friends or a gf, just things. They don't sound particularly happy, usually.
r9k's problem is that its users, along with lack of money (bad), /also frequently lack even the more important things in life/ (even worse!), which I've suggested above. Which is why they are so unhappy.
>>28397753
Ok, so which of those things can you get without money?
Yeah, thought so. Retard.
>>28397799
Money is not the fundamental currency which precedes the good genetics that some Chads and attractive white people more generally are blessed to be born with --- /without spending any money to be born/.
Power writ large, and the sexual marketplace, are the real currencies which are foundational of that happy circumstance. Money is a human invention which streamlines things, but an abstract contrivance nevertheless. Power, sex and the human need for social interaction are what are objectively real about the world.
You make the unimaginative beta mistake of only referencing the present state of affairs, /and only for yourself/, which I anticipated in my above post: "hur u need money to get much (you think all) of dat so da money is da most important dur". Why didn't it occur to you to be born a woman or a chad instead so that people give you things for free?
It's true that real happiness comes from a combination of having the money to support the lifestyle you want, and experiencing a real genuine connection with other human being(s). In the modern western world it can be very difficult to keep hold of one, much less both. Could also be that we're just too spoiled. I notice third worlders tend to be a lot happier, they also typically have big families and communities, not this shit we have where its one guy, one girl, one kid; or maybe just one parent and one kid; or even one single guy who sort of sees a handful of friends once a month. Humans probably aren't meant to live these ways.
>>28398008
>Why didn't it occur to you to be born a woman or a chad instead so that people give you things for free?
Why didn't it occur to me to go back to the big bang and design the universe so it's all pink fluffy unicorns living on giant gumballs?
>>28398212
>I notice third worlders tend to be a lot happier
When the fuck did you notice this, when you went to the third world and people smiled at you expecting money and the whores and booze were cheap for your standards? No one is fucking happy here.
True love is a very rare thing, our culture has romanticized it and makes us think that it's a common part of life for everyone. The second biggest secret to enjoying life is to learn to love your own company.
>>28391390
they don't have to be that way at all tho
>>28391390
That's not what a relationship is though.
If you want sex and something to cuddle put a fleshlight in a teddy bear.
If you want someone to grow with, complementary companionship and both of you work together toward self-improvement then that's a relationship. Why would you be in one if you aren't looking for AND willing to work toward those things?
