>Man anon you've been through some shit huh?
>You aren't shown much affection are you?
>Were you just talking to yourself?
>Why don't you smile more?
>tfw realize that someday in the probably-not-so-distant future, the internet will be trawled for information about every single individual and you'll be fucked by all of the things you said on social media between the ages of 16 and 22
>tfw deleting every post, like, video, image, etc is a real bitch and will probably take the rest of the night
I don't want to be known... just comfy.
>>27754872
I'm glad I deactivated my facebook when I was 19. I recently went back and deleted all my pictures/removed all my friends and ramped up the privacy so it's like it was never there.
It took like a whole night you're right about that.
![a0425747cb[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/nHWr3CS.jpg "a0425747cb[1].jpg")
>>27754960
It's doubly horrendous for me because I was a real /pol/lack for a while and went on similar subreddits. I'm basically going down my old accounts, editing in lorem ipsum blahblahblah and then deleting after.
I think I'm going to get a VPN as well. It also helps with torrents, not having to care about that .1% chance that you'll get a cease-and-desist letter at your door.
After this, I'm going into old email accounts and unsubbing from all newsletters and deleting all old accounts, no matter what they are.
I think in the future, if we do end up having singularity-like technology, I'm going to end up being a hider like in http://www.orionsarm.com/eg-topic/45bd1a9eb4a5c.
>tfw no qt hug bot to comfort me when I feel anxious
>20 hours a week job is slowly making me hate everything
>Music, the only thing I'm good at is now becoming a fucking chore
>College which I used to enjoy has lost it's sparkle and is now a chore
>Hating myself more and more everyday
Too scared /don't want family to feel bad to an hero
Every day I hope I wake up and I'm in my old house, 12 years old in a slipknot tshirt with hair down to my shoulders and I can be young and stupid again. I hate being an adult, I fucking hate it so fucking much and I can't even complain because people tell me "that's just life".
If life is being miserable and tired all the time it's not for me thanks
>>27755831
It gets a little better when you accept defeat.
>>27754778
I think this song sits well in here my fellow anons.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HEuBVDhTPvo
>Boss called off my shift tomorrow
>answered the phone with a shitty cold after some wine
>dunno if I sounded intoxicated
>realize boss may not work until Monday and wants to fire me in person
>she probably saw my shaky hands as a drug problem than fear of her and nerve damage
I'm fucking wish I left with my parents to home instead of being stubborn
>>27754778
>try to become a teacher
>the kids bully you
>the chad of the class feels sorry for you
>your authority comes from one of the chad in the class and you are his beta while you are more than 10 years older.
>gf's brother just purged himself on all social media, etc.
w-what did i do?
>>27754778
>Why are you so quiet anon???
>Yea you never say anything!!!
>>27754872
That's why i have never used facebook and never will.
I saw exactly were facebook was going from day one, I got to the sign up page and it asked for my real name lol i noped the fuck right out of there.
You bet your ass it's being used to catalog and profile people.
>>27756372
you were self centered enough to think someone very loosely related to you did anything on your account
>take up jogging
>jog the past a couple qt's jogging in the other direction
>Give them a nod and they smile
>Lack the confidence or wit to try and talk to them
>They probably don't even know of my existence while I remember them vividly because I have no friends
>>27754872
>what are databases
You realise that even deleting it doesn't matter right? It's al archived and saved regardless
>first kissed last tuesday
>got her whatsapp and messaged her yesterday
>oneitis slowly growing
No! Not again...
>>27754778
>I don't want so sound rude, son but...have you even had a girlfriend?
>>27756507
I always wonder this to. People seem to make an extreme profound impact on me as I think of them for days to come. They probably forgot me instantly cause they have a life.
Or do you think other people are as sad and lonely that they think of us the entire week to come to?
>>27756523
Yea but by deactivating it you are stopping the digital paper trail.
They will have a personality profile of you that stops at that time, Location data that may not be accurate anymore, Contact cross references that are not accurate anymore.
They got what you gave them but that doesn't mean you have to keep giving it to them.
>constantly thinking about that one person
>your life basically revolves around them
>they probably think you're just a creep if they think about you at all
>>27756576
Ohh, i want greentext for dat one
>>27756578
>do you think other people are as sad and lonely that they think of us the entire week to come to?
No. Most people don't remember strangers at all. They're too busy with their own friend circle drama and social media.
>>27756523
>You realise that even deleting it doesn't matter right? It's al archived and saved regardless
Yeah, I know that. It's better to have a dead stop though than to continue on not caring. The smaller your footprint, the better. The older it is, the likelier it is that what footprints I have will be overwritten. Here's a good article about it: https://gigaom.com/2012/09/19/the-disappearing-web-information-decay-is-eating-away-our-history/
I'm praying to every deity that I don't believe in that SpaceX builds that Mars colony. I want to leave and go out to the frontier. I don't want to see what comes of life and the people here. It almost seems like we'll end up in a dystopia sooner or later.
>>27756320
Well I can't login to view my schedule. I'm fucked.
>>27757754
Im sorry anon that really sucks. Good luck finding a new job bud
>oneitis pays you no more mind than she would anyone else and you can tell
>hate working
>don't want to put in the effort to find a way to make money on my own
>really unhappy all the time and feel guilty because I technically have a lot
>worried that no matter what I do and how good things get I will always be unhappy because I'm an unhappy person
>living in my mom's basement and I hate it
>once lived on my own but then my roommates fucked me over
>hate myself
I'm so fucking angry.
>tfw cut contact with the last of my friends before they realize i'm a loser neet
>tfw you realize stockholm syndrome can apply to any relationship depending on the parameters
>tfw to you the relationship between individual and society regarding how you soend your time is stockholm syndrome but theres no alternative because there are too many people to revert to hunter gatherer life
>>27754778
>Just heard a few hours that my brother just killed himself.
>Parents called me this morning to come home from uni.
>Happen to be hundreds of miles away from home for a rager this weekend.
>We have always been so callous to each other, but I did not know how to feel.
>Robots, I do not know what to do? I am going back tomorrow back home to visit my parents. I do not know what to tell them.
What should I do my robots?
>>27754872
>tfw I have never had an account with my actual name so I'm goochie
>>27758636
iktf
You should probably go because it will just get worse faster
>>27758676
I will asap, but I am stuck in a far away city. I have a ride tomorrow morning from a friend, but they are too drunk right now. My parents called me this morning about some "intense private matter," but I wasn't sure what it was about until my friend heard from another friend at my brother's uni.
>>27758568
Iktf. Dropped out of university after 4 months and quit my supermakret job because its depressing as shit and outstandingly unfulfilling. Now everything makes me angry
>>27758595
Anon, can you give me stockholm syndrome?
>been crushing on a shy, average-looking girl in my mathematics and technology club, hard
>she always laughs at my stupid fucking jokes when I'm in the room, even if I'm not even talking to her.
>she sometimes smiles at me, too (just being friendly, I'm guessing)
>yet, when I talk to her, she seems completely and utterly disinterested some days, and other times she seems to genuinely enjoy my presence, and she shoots the shit with me
>she started approaching me more, which is huge for someone like her, that doesn't talk to anyone
>yesterday I decided to ask her to lunch, or something
>I call her name yesterday, and she completely fucking ignores me, and I'm right in front of her
>she looks at me, and then stands up and leaves the room
>later that day, she's back, and some new guy that wanted information about the club asks her about it
>they proceed to talk for half an hour, more than I ever have with her, and it's been a whole fucking semester
>she has absolutely never been this engaging with a guy, before. it almost didn't seem like she was shy
>the guy didn't ask for her number, but you could tell that she was begging for it
>when the guy enters and leaves the room, she closely watches him
>when I enter or sit near her, she barely fucking reacts, or sometimes doesn't notice
what the actual fuck. i'm not even friends with the girl, but this guy just swoops in and woos her like nothing. and he was fat and shorter than me, too.
how do I give up on women completely? please, I need to stop worrying about this, so much.
>>27756403
I doubt someone's called Dickson butz but I am. And I'm from analville.
>>27758661
>goochie
True robot confirmed
>>27758568
>>27758745
In addition to this feel
>dad and dad's side of the family lives in Arizona
>they're always trying to call and talk to me
>never pick up
>been calling extra since it was my birthday recently
>just don't have the courage to talk to them because I'm a piece of shit
>Starting to feel seriously hopeless, like there doesn't seem to be any end in sight
>>27754778
>first day of a uni class
>have to do this thing where you have to have a conversation with every member of the class for a few minutes
>have to talk to an attractive female who is a few inchs taller than me
>seems to like me, asks if I have a gf, says that I'm cute, also does a movement that shows off her tits while talking to me
>I've got my hopes up
>a week or two later, someone posts a link on r9k to a pua site that has an article about how to tell whether or not a girl is attracted to you
>the site says that sometimes if a women can tell that a man does not talk to women very often she will tease him with no intent of sex
>the site explains that if a girl leads a conversation with you, and asked questions about you and does not talk about her self it means she is teasing you
>this is exactly what happened, also she's taller than me, also she called me cute which means I'm in the same category as puppy's and kids, both things women don't want to fuck
I think I've been rused la famila
>>27758819
Hahahaha its heart warming how naive you are brobot.
That bitch has been running laps around you in the psychology mind fuck game. Basically, she did(does?) want you, but you fucked up by not showing her that you wanted her, so she brings this other guy in in front of you, and she'll take whichever one is more alpha and is harder to get.
Welcome to the world of women, they're best used as fleshlights and ignored until age 30
>>27758896
>>27758896
I know this feel very very well.
>>27759183
In other words, she does want you but she wants you to force her out of her shell and shit, and she's shown you intentionally that she can get another guy and ignore you at will.
Feel free to toy with it but be careful because women are succubus and she will hurt you more the more you give a shit about her
>>27759124
This is the worst case of overanalyzing I've ever seen. Just fucking talk to her. If she calls you cute, then she thinks you're cute. There's no hidden meaning or any of that bullshit, stop doubting yourself and making excuses
>tfw I tried to rekindle the relationship with friends that I cut off, but now they all see how much of a loser that I really am
>>27754872
if that ever happens, we'll probably be experiencing massive civil unrest anyway so why should I give a shit?
>Hey anon you wouldn't look so mad all the time if you got laid
>Heh, yeah maybe
>have brief interaction with qt girl
>be depressed for weeks
I keep trying to intellectualize my feelings and actions in an attempt to make sense of things because I'm scared.
I've always had a deep seated fear of everything, and can't handle noises around me, or people, the world is just so...loud. As I grew it felt like someone had been watching me from my back just peering over always watching me, sometimes when I look in the mirror I don't recognize myself or become extremely scared for no reason. A fear so great I freeze, tremble, and shut down. Someone or something behind me it seems always there.
I've been having gaps in my memory, months at a time. Then I go back to living a bit more then back to the haze. I've been alone most of my life and had tried to fit in, really had tried, tried to reach out to be loved to be liked, did what my parents told me to do, then realized I had been ignoring what I really wanted, I had become this empty shell of a person as my parents tried to live through me.
I've never told my psychiatrists about it, about the fear. The fear. It never ends. The fear is always there, sometimes it even feels good and I accept it, its almost thrilling, but at times its not just crippling its physically painful. Jesus Christ. The emotional co-dependence thing doesn't help either, its literally yandere-tier behavior sometimes, even if I'm 6'2'' and physically fit or some other shit, extreme attachment and I can recognize it sometimes but in the end I always end up alone. Its my own fault, my own need to be stimulated and inability to focus, my own choices in the end.
Jack.
His name is Jack.
The only Feel in this thread should be the fact that every single one of you are just lazy.
You're all self-diagnosed retards. The only reason you are this way is because you chose to be stupid.
There is no other reason except you are lazy.
People like you actually take away from people who actually DO have problems.
You're just a bunch of whiney faggots
>>27759357
This is a meme. Losing your virginity does nothing besides getting the mental block of "getting laid will help" out of the way.
>>27759398
>problems having intrinsic value
top wew
>>27759402
I was just getting bullied
Adult bullied like the complete loser I am
>>27759398
Honestly this might be true. I used to think I had aspergers, but then noticed that I got much better at social interaction in a span of 2-3 years where I had a group of friends to mentor me. I don't think I've ever seriously tried to get a girl in my 21 years of life. I always just convince myself that its not worth the effort since I'm "retarded" and it won't work out anyway.
>>27754872
agree on this
>>27759381
described my life
>>27754872
>tfw see all of the stacies posting lewdpics for everyone to see
>tfw they'll delete it all in 7-8 years when they decide to "get serious"
>>27754872
>implying social media existed for me during those times, all the forums and irc I used, I have different IP, switched at least over a thousand times since then
>implying I would haved used facebook or had an over the table paying job
>tfw sleep deprived with a concussion
It hurts.
>tfw will never be not sleep deprived because the thing preventing me from sleeping is my parents refusing to turn off their television
I'm in despair.
>>27759520
>delete it all
It was still be cached in a NSA server somewhere
Senior prom was tonight, I had no one to go with.
>>27754872
I absolutely have put nothing revealing in any of my real life accounts.
I only say vile shit here in 4chan. If that ever gets published and associated with real people now... oh boy I'm screwed
>very sunny, nice day out
>just driving my car, feeling ok... not great but ok
>look at myself in the rear view mirror
>the sun is shining on my hair
>i can literally see patches of my scalp all over
>it's literally the most clear indication of how bad my hair is thinning i've ever seen
>I cant get this image out of my head
I knew my hair was going, but seeing how it looks with the sun shining on it... fuck.. It's literally soul crushing
>inb4 just shave it
There's nothing more in life I would like to do than be able to shave my head. I would do it in a heart-beat. But instead, I was born with a massive fucking dent in my head. Growing up my hairdresser always knew to leave the top part of my hair a little longer so the dent wouldn't be visible.
In school I became traumatized from people touching my head because one time I let a QT touch my head and she recoiled her hand with a disgusted look on her face.. 'oh...'
Now, at 22 I'm already rapidly thinning. Some days it looks better than others. I wish I could just say fuck it and shave it. But that stupid FUCKING dent. The day will come sooner or later. I'm just ready for it.
You though going bald at a young age was bad, then throw in a severe skull deformity. And I'm literally just a wagie working retail so I have a shit load of people look at me day in and day out.
the ultimate
>JUST
>>27759397
We have a lot in common anon
>>27759639
>I'm just ready for it.
I meant to say I'm not ready for it. I wish I was. It's made me contemplate suicide on more than a few occasions.
>Why are you so quite Anon?
I get this one a lot
>>27755831
I'm at the same point, I miss being young and carefree so fucking bad. I hate seeing teens treating me like an old male. I hate the feeling that everyone my age is settled and I'm unable to match up.
I'm only 24 year old and I feel like I've jumped my fucking shark.
The only consolation I get is knowing all those who mock me for being old will get to this point eventually too and maybe will feel half of what I'm feeling
>>27759617
Could've been worse.
You could've gone.
*powers down after posting to avoid the feels
>>27756680
Ahhh I see anon you dont want your soul weighed down by gravity.
>tfw diagnosed with asperger's in first grade
Requesting picture from Anon who never replied to his dad's text, like "hello son wot u up to?"
>>27758819
google: shit-test
this is a real thing but females will never admit to doing it, mainly because it's so ingrained in their shitty nature they're not even aware of doing it.
>I quit smiling the day I turned 15.
>the day my dad divorced my mom
>the day I stopped believing in love
>the day i was rejected from 3 universities
>the day my dad took off to brazil
>the day i signed up for the Army
>the day i was medically dicharged
>the day I realized
>the day my sister almost killed herself
>the day my best friend died
>the Day I was Born.
because I knew the world was an ugly place, but for a long time I took it as a joke. I took myself as a joke for so long, I never took it seriously, so now, i'm a fucking mess going a community college.
>>27759671
What up young balding famalama
My hair is very thin on top and receded very, very far and wide at my temples, I'm 22
I don't have a dent but I do have an extreme case of the Skellies, so I'm gonna try eat a lot and start lifting then shave it off.
id try give you realistic, good advice if I could see the dent...
>be in research class thursday
>have to present our research topic, our angle, and research we've done so far
>say my reports on Homestead Strike of 1892
>teacher asks me to explain the strike for those who don't know about it
>start explaining the strike
>after 5 minutes teacher cuts me off and says "well I said explain it, I didn't mean for you to read out your whole paper haha"
>whole class laughing at me
>staring at me
>face goes red
>lightheaded
>tears coming to my eyes
>why is everyone still staring at me
>oh god I want out
>teacher asks what my angle is, and to keep it under 5 minutes
>stammer out "either the effect of the strike on Carnegie's steel industry or the effect on the unions"
>teacher tells me that's a horrible idea and that he suggests I focus on something like how it affected Carnegie's steel industry
>Nigga that's what I just said
>get more embarrassed and about to break down
>everyone still staring at me
>awkwardly make my way back to my desk
>want to kill myself
Why are normies so ruthless
>>27759752
nice assburgers dude
would totally play sonic or whatever the fuck with
>>27759752
>shhh nothin' personnel kid...
>I'll be 23 in 6 months
>Time seems to be moving faster and faster and my methods of escapism seem to be growing more and more ineffective, meanwhile I have yet to achieve any of the milestones most people my age reached 5 years ago and am hardly any more of an adult than I was at 16
It feels like I'm in one of those RTS or city building games where they give you the option to speed up time and I pressed the "3x speed" button and now I can't turn it off
>>27759124
It's okay, anon. I think you're cute <3
>>27759442
One will become less spergy overtime, but only through learning how to act human. The keyword being act.
I definitely want to make some changes in my life, starting with getting a new circle of friends. Current ones make unsolicited phone calls at 3 AM in the weekends when they they're out partying. Most of the time someone messages on Friday evenings, I am 95 % sure it isn't an invite.
Don't be a pushover like me, robots
>>27759822
Haha hey bro
I've always been a twig too. im 5'11 and am the same weight I've been since high school - 140lbs.
Appreciate you offering that but I don't think it's visible at my current hair length. Unless the sun or a spotlight is on my head. It's thinning bad but still not quite visible.
I'm just trying to get out of retail and into something wen design related because I have an AA related to that. Then I can shave my head without dealing with a million people in a fucking retail enviroment and worrying about people judging my physical appearance
>it's ok to be lost anon lol you're 20
>life isn't a race
>it doesn't matter if literally everyone around you is progressing and building careers and families and lives because somehow you being a fucking loser is unique and ok
>everything is just ok :))))))
Fuck you. Life is inherently a race and I'm losing.
>>27760006
Web design*
Fuck this iPhone 4 and planned obcelescence
it'll get better, guys. but you have to work for it.
I feel legitimately depressed for the first time in a while, usually just sad but I can get over it with vidya or music or food or anything really that can distract me, but not this time
>give classmate a ride to an art museum
>see another classmate there
>ask him if ex had emailed him the rough sketch for what we were all working on
>he says no, tells me she did mention that me and her dated and that I was an asshole about something
>suddenly feels like I'm sucked into a dark abyss
>didn't even realize she still talked about me
>even less so that she's saying bad things
>both classmates think she's crazy
>tell me they know I'm a good person
>I hear them but don't really say much
>on the ride home classmate tells me he had a good time and that he owes me one
>so out of it I don't even realize what he's doing when he reaches for a high five
>>h-hey man you're gonna leave me hangin?
>>uh.. huh? oh sorry man I didn't even realize what you were doing
>can't get her out of my head
>>27759880
>20 in one fucking month
holy shit how the hell is it only a month away just fucking kill me already
on the bright side, only one more year until I can start drinking myself to death
>>27760208
literally the nicest thing anyone has said to me for a long time.
This ocean of sadness fills up inside me, drip by drip, until it's just my eyelids holding it back. It's easy sometimes, when I'm alone, when I'm drinking, for the levees to break just a little bit.
>>27760043
If it's any consolation, literally every hallmark of success is a meme perpetuated by society, and even though you won't be remembered 100 years after you die, neither will any of the people you envy.
>>27760267
I wish I could cry more often. It feels good in a way.
The most tearjerking words are when my mother says my sisters love to help me in any way when I need it.
>>27760043
Fuck. People say the same thing to me. I'm 19, but it's still dicks.
>>27760331
I go back and forth between this mindset and the opposing school of thought. I'm a lazy fuck, working 35 hours a week, no school, and I just play guitar in my free time. Music and art makes me happy, but I can't help but feel that maybe just being "happy" isn't enough.
>>27760267
I can't tell if you were trying to be poetic, or if you're just a pompous cock.
>not really depressed but get random pangs of depression
>get overcome with an overwhelming sense of uselessness
>just lay on bed contemplating why nothing matters
>can't even bother getting up for a couple of hours
>when I finally do get up feel like shit because I spent hours remembering how much of a fuck up I am
>dad is paying for university out of pocket
>don't take it seriously and fail classes
>dad still believes in me and breaks his back working overtime everyday
>have no friends in uni
>try to get in touch with friends from hs
>"sure anon I'll let you know when I'm free so we can hang out"
>its been two years and they've never so much as texted me
>still have pent up anger from middle school bullying
>randomly snap at people for no reason
>almost choked out a friend in hs over report card grades
I always remind myself someone else has it worse, but it doesn't help. At least I've been feeling better since I start working out.
I want to become a better writer, but everything I produce is uninteresting trash. Either I write literary analysis that nobody wants to read, or I attempt to develop a story that ends up as a stilted abortion of style.
I'm currently pursuing an English major. I used to be the best writer in my high school classes. Now I'm too embarrassed to even show my work to my mother.
Too make matters worse, I recently had a dream where I fell in love and heard back from a publisher on that book I finally wrote. I woke up devastated, thrust back into the reality of being a fat loser with too much debt and nothing to care about. I have friends, I have drugs, but I don't have a reason to live and I'm just trudging along in the hopes that I figure something out.
>>27760446
>At least I've been feeling better since I start working out.
Don't neglect cardio mane. Just sayin
>>27760490
maybe drugs are what makes your writing shit anon
>>27760407
If success doesn't make you happy, what's the point in succeeding?
>>27760507
I skipped it this week due to the weather being shitty, but I go for a jog any day I can. Feels good not being obese anymore. My memory seems to be getting better too, but I might just be imagining that.
>>27760524
I doubt it. It's not like I'm shooting meth, I just smoke weed and take shrooms. I drink at parties.
Not reading and writing makes me terrible writer. But I'm also depressed, and lack the energy to do anything outside of what's required to get good grades and maintain friendships. I barely achieve that.
>used to churn out twitter and tumblr content a lot
>made friends with people i guess, spent a lot of time making my stuff
>aside from part time work it'd be what i'd pour all of my time into doing, making that content
>blogs won me a scholarship to a nice school
>as school started to pick up i maintained my blogs less and less
>i literally just worked on school stuff all day
>twitter and tumblr are usually just open on my computer
>see stuff from mutuals, they're doing their blogging thing
>get really down about it and how distant it feels now
i have to remind myself school is a priority but i wish i had the time or the patience to manage both school and that. school is just so much work. i miss being really into making my stuff.
>ywn live in a fantasy world where amazing and wonderful things happen
>even if you did you'd still be an outcast loser that nobody likes
It's an abstract kinda feel
>>27759828
I think that the effect on unions would also be interesting. I mean, Carnegie's steel industry was bound to collapse at some point, but worker's rights are one of those things that continually accumulate over time. It represents the bigger picture, you know?
Anyway, I wouldn't worry about those people laughing at you. The only person thinking about it in bed tonight will be you.
>>27760631
It sounds like you've got your priorities straight. It's kind of sad to lose a fan base you worked so hard to accumulate, but now that you've done it once you know you're capable of doing it again.
>have to decide what I want to do with my life
>not even thinking about the decision
>each day that passes is going to make it 10x harder
>I know this yet I still refuse to think about the decision
>"you don't even want to change anon, you want to stay depressed so you won't have to take responsibility for your life"its true
>graduate college
>get job shitty job that you tell yourself you will quit once you find a better job
>getting five year pin in two days
>never wrote that book I said I would write once I graduated
>still a virgin despite being 29
>all my friends are getting married and moving away
>turn 20 in 11 days
>realize I've been an adult for 2 years
>haven't done or experienced anyrhing at all in my life
>realize that ever day is getting worse
>worries have gone from when is a girl gonna fuck me to what the fuck am I doing with my life
Fuck my shit up
>>27760867
>>27760934
>>27760941
>>27760961
Holy shit, you guys should form a club
>Tfw everyone hates me at work
>>27761016
Stop bully
>>27761016
This IS the club
>>27761083
What a sad existence I must have to come to r9k to pick on robots
>>27754778
umm..what day is it?
I broke up with a cute quirky girl with awesome parents that thought she loved me because I was going into highschool and didn't want to be dating a girl a year younger than me that was still in middle school. I genuinely thought that I would meet someone else in high school. How fucking naive.
>>27761459
When was that, 8th grade?
I doubt it would have made a huge impact on your current life.
>>27761459
I did the same thing. I remember my exact words after were "How long could I possibly stay single?"
It's almost a decade later and I haven't had a meaningful relationship with a girl since.
JUST
>>27761459
underage get out, enjoy high school, unfuck your life now
>>27761518
You have to understand, the situation was practically arranged marriage tier. My mom and her parents were good friends. Her parents liked me. I spent time alone talking to her grandfather and he liked me. If I had stuck with it I likely would be dating her to this day.
I saw her a handful of times and parties that my mom dragged me to. I'm still friends with her on Facebook.
>>27759593
Get some earplugs faggot. Have you seriously never thought about that before?
>>27761625
Why not try messaging her?
>>27761570
I had fun in high school. I did a lot of drugs, got good grades, and now I'm going to a decent university. But I didn't meet anyone then, and I doubt I'll meet anyone now.
I finally caved and downloaded snapnormie, and added everyone in my phone. Now every time I look at people's stories I get depressed because everyone is with friends or partying all the time.
>>27759817
>the day I stopped believing in love
this is the worst feeling, because it's true. life is tragic
>>27761675
I did the same but realized I only have people from work in my contacts
Only 1 guy accept my friend request
>>27761675
This.
I only downloaded it because I wanted to stay relevant. I don't want to become that kid that people just "remember" sometimes.
But I see my friends hanging out together. I just don't know why they don't even invite me. And I see my friends who are away at uni and they're getting gfs and have large groups of friends. I just wish I was doing that, too. I'm wasting the best years of my life here. But I'm really scared because I know deep down, even if I was there, nothing would be any different.
>>27761675
this is my exact experience with Facebook in high school. always told myself I was going to integrate into the normal social world but only tortured myself looking at everyone's photos knowing that i would never really be like them, i would only be pretending
>>27761652
You'll be alright. Focus on yourself
>>27754778
>>Were you just talking to yourself?
>>Why don't you smile more?
>tfw talk to myself constantly
>tfw resting bitch face and everyone thinks I'm constantly angry
>>27761016
You mean /r9k/?
>>27761802
Psychotic bro how are ya
>>27761642
Two reasons.
I'm a coward. Back when I dated her, we were at a family party during New Years Eve. We were standing on the front lawn, and of the adults were in the house. It was 12:01 and I decided not to kiss her.
During that time I was pretty suicidal, and my mom move me in with my grandparents an hour and a half a way. I only saw her a handful of times after that, and then we broke up. I'm still a kissless virgin.
The other reason is that she's still in highschool. Beyond the creepiness factor, I have too much on my plate to try and rekindle middle school romances. My long term plan is to move to Alaska and die alone.
>>27761995
Sorry for the typos, posting from mobile blows dick.
>>27761995
Eh... if you're plan is to just die why not atleast give it a try?
I went one a date with a high school junior (I was 18 at the time, she was 17).
I only got that date because I messaged her. Even though we only talked once, months prior. I had not expected her to be into me, but it still worked out...
...until the actual date, atleast, but thats unimportant.
Just give it a try.
>>27761838
I'm okay
My only real friend insulted me when she was black out drunk the other day so I'm kinda sad
>you're a kind person but I'm the only one who will ever appreciate you
>tfw it's actually really accurate
I'm just lucky to have a friend I guess
>>27762097
Friends cut deep that's what we're here for.
At the end of the day you always have yourself.
>>27762133
>tfw /r9k/ is my support group
thank you kind animeposter
you're the best
>>27762067
Maybe I will. Couldn't hurt. It's not like there's anyone around here worth dating, and summer is pretty close.
>often think and cringe about things ive said
>swear to myself when im alone that i should talk less to avoid creating more cringe and to not appear as one of those retarded juvenile adults
>end up talking less and less, seems to work out for the most part as i can think through what to say more carefully
>even this post is subject to this as ive just 2/3rds of it
>>27762273
>as ive just 2/3rds of it
You're thinkin too hard
>>27759402
This is the truth. It didn't help me, and only made me feel emptier because I didn't like the girl, sex for the sake of sex is meaningless. It won't fix you.
>28
>moms dead
>dad took off after birth
>dad used to hit me as baby to make me stop crying
>was molested
>haven't seen nor spoke to my siblings in years
>live in shithole room for 300$ a month
>work shitty retail job
>drink myself into oblivion on the daily
>>27762401
You're still living though right? It's never too late to change
>>27762401
kill yourself please. Seriously, you're not doing anyone any good, goyim.
>I've never known what it was liking having a friend/companion in my life.
>Spent most of my childhood alone inside because people didn't like me.
>was obese as fuck for most of my life and hate myself and body
>Spent most of my school life eating by myself until I just skipped lunch all together to hide myself in the library.
>Lose weight and drop over 60lbs.
>Despite being less than 150lbs I still see myself in disgust.
>Have a good paying job but requires me to be sociable which is hard
>still eat lunch by myself because I'm too used to it
>can't love myself.
I just want to know what not being alone feels like is all. I know I'll never know what kissing is like or holding another female's hand while in love. Or even have a gf.
I just wish to able to have one friend in this life to speak to.
>>27760446
>failing
>dad is breaking back for you
>because he loves you
You're such a piece of shit anon.
>>27762543
I'm working on it.original comment
>tfw high and no girlfriend to curl up in my lap
:-(!
!)-:
>in a Skype call with a group of friends (inb4 leave normie reee)
>1 girl in group is your favorite member
>through a series of drinks and weird truth games, she confesses you're actually her least favorite
>leave feeling slightly betrayed
>Oh hai, wat iz this some sort of feels thraed?
>We no have zis back in 07
>>27762253
hey. do it bro. at least then you'll know. go for something low commitment: "Hey x, long time no see. Let's grab a coffee and catch up! Why don't you meet at [location] at [time]."
>>27762809
FUCK THAT IS BRUTAL
![drinkingalone[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/nBgtt0R.jpg "drinkingalone[1].jpg")
>>27762847
2007 was 10 years ago and I don't know what I have to show for it
>only person I love blocked me without telling me
>2 friends
>1 in america who'll probably die from suicide
>another in same country who wants to smoke weed all day
>got semi pro at esports
>4th perma ban
>jew ban system cause i call kids bad hehehe :3
>too demoralise to even try
>better than every other graphic designer in my class
>ms paint > photoshop
>mother is suicidal
>im suicidal
>my half black brother thinks im racist for funny meme
>I WANNA FUCKING DIE
>Start getting life in check.
>Exercising, got a job, talking to old friends and generally starting to feel good that my life could go right.
>Be about two months ago.
>Go to see my doctor because of stomach pains.
>Always had problems with my stomach xue to stress, ulcers, deterioration due to stres (Intensifies the production of acids)
>Get a call about two weeks later to go back in for tests.
>Find out that my stomach has become permanently damaged and I would be lucky to live until 45.
What do I do, Robots? I finally went from my old piece of shit self and got my life in check to build a future and hopefully a family and now my life expectancy is cut in half. Have since turned back into a piece of shit through fear.
>>27754778
>tfw I used to dislike women when I was11-12
>tried to grow out of it in my teens but always felt like they're inferior in many ways
>now I hate them more than ever since I'm a bitter virgin
How will I ever get a gf when I honestly can't stand women lads? Should I just accept my fate and hire a hooker? Only people I hate more than women are their male slaves who enable their behavior by fueling their self esteem, I wish we'd go back to the old ways when women knew their place
>>27754872
>tfw reading 5+ years old cringy posts you've made
>>27764325
I am in this feelboat with you, anon
>have hereditary chronic form of GERD
>except it's different, I don't know if there's a name for it but my stomach is misshapen
>my dad has it, but he's doing alright
>his mother had it much worse than he did, and she died at 44 of stomach cancer
>I have it worse than either of them had it
>have stomach ulcers
>can't eat certain foods
>throw up all the time
>big parts of my stomach and esophagus have been eaten away by stomach acid
>stress makes everything worse, speeds up progression of the disease
I'm just hoping I'll get the cancer so everyone will pander to me and then I can just die. that sounds pretty ideal.
>>27764455
Are you me? I don't hate them, I'm just disgusted by their behavior. Women these days have to much confidence, and I rage internally when I see guys giving them too much attention, stroking their ego's.
> Be me, sitting in library reading a book
> Notice a group of 17-18 year old girls walking by
> One of the girls comes across an old classmate it seems.
> She greets him and asks how and what he's doing. As he replies, she turns around and walks away laughing mockingly, leaving the guy flustered
Why the fuck do they do this? Don't they know the average guy can literally end their lives by choking them out. If I were a girl, I would definitely know my place and do everything I can to avoid a physical confrontation with a male.
>>27764943
Honestly, I'm glad some guys are just opting out seeing as women no longer offer things to men that we can't get from whores and no matter what women would have you believe, it's not just losers like me who think this way, my normie friends think and talk this way about women too when it's just us guys, they just have no self control and still hit on them. I hope VR technology progresses fast so we won't need them all in the future.
>>27759124
>>first day of a uni class
>>have to do this thing where you have to have a conversation with every member of the class for a few minutes
This is a thing?
>I know what love and having a gf feels like
>I wish I wouldn't
>>27754778
What is actually worth living for anymore?
With my realization that love is probably unattainable, the inevitable depletion of natural resources, the slow decline of my race, the ever increasingly disfuntional government, and the sad failure of a life ive lived, I havent a clue what actually fucking matters anymore.
Everything seems so doomed and fucking pointless. I cant even make a good life. The world is against me 100%.
I dont know anymore. All of my friends and co workers are giving up. They have told me to give up but I just cant.
I want love and a family so bad but its not even possible is it? What do I live for? Myself?
>>27754872
>tfw only used my real name for my FB and never even posted there
>tfw have a common as fuck name so finding my old edgy accounts on forums will be hard as fuck
Feels good. Although I'll never be able to become famous, I don't care about that though.
>>27754872
>not curating a perfectly normal and unremarkable online profile of yourself
It's like you think not engaging in social media isn't a red flag in itself
>>27765529
It's called "ice-breakers" and it is pure shit.
>relative's birthday, holiday, etc.
>taking pictures
>force a smile so I don't look back and find the photo depressing
>get depressed at the fact that I have to force a smile
>>27763210
No it wasnt you dumb faggot!
>>27760446
How about you get your ass into gear and start studying, do it for your Dad it at least for fuck's sake. You're an A grade cunt if you piss away the opportunity your Dad's given you.
>>27764325
Prove them wrong.
I don't like this feel.
I sure love spending my sunday jerking off, cringing about texting her while drunk last night and generally not feeling like doing anything.
Life is peachy.
>tfw you are keanu reeves
>>27768151
oh shiiiit man sorry to see that
>get tinder
>all the girls are attractive like what the fuck why do you even need online dating
>deliberately target the more homely.plain ones
>no matches
fuck this
>Haven't made friends in six years
>Feeling increasingly lonely and unwanted
>Tried again and again to find someone I could connect with
>Play fightan, host tournament in the hopes I could find someone, not even to be particularly close with but just to play with from time to time and talk
>Get fair turnout
>No one attempts to befriend me or play me outside of it
>Have small number of online friends I'm close to, helping less and less
>Start to feel like I'm depending too much on two in particular
>Going to come online less frequently
>Can't vent about much by starting a new thread on /r9k/ because anons will attack you for it or it will die without any (You)s
>parents divorced when I was 13
>dad moved to a different country because of debt
>bullied at school every day
>stop going to school for days at a time
>got so bad that they were going to call the police on my mum because I just didn't want to go
>dropped out of school at 15
>develop terrible anxiety & depression issues
>avoidance coping behaviours
>stay inside every day for years
>don't trust anyone in a position of help & authority because of my time in school where teachers couldn't do anything to help me
>don't know how to handle responsibility, work, relationships
>literally scared of life itself
>everyone I grew up with has moved on in life
>gf's, fiances, careers, houses, kids
>im still waking up past midday every day and not showering for over a week at a time
>no ambition, no hope for the future
>no savings
>no pension
>just going through the motions every day, distracting myself with games, music, tv & music from the hopelessness of life
>dont remember what happy is any more
>too scared to kill myself
I turn 29 next month....
>Two years ago
>There was a girl, 7/10, really into me
>We dated for a while
>I was a bit of an arrogant douche
>I first ended it after just a couple of days, but we got back together later
>She moved abroad for an internship for a while, I moved abroad for a job, we ended things
>Come back from stay abroad, she has a bf now
>Realize my mistake
>She's in love with him now
>Sit alone most days, playing vidya and browsing YouTube
>She goes and sees places with him, goes on holidays
>This is the future I chose
>This is the future I chose
>>27765025
We don't need them now either, only to bear children.
>"man, I can't wait to get home and have some time to myself"
>why? It's not like I'm going to do anything with it anyway.
>>27759124
Anyone reading this DO NOT fall for a staceys lead on. They do this to test their power level. The more nervous the guy gets when teased, the more attractive the roastie is.
She just wants a reaction to her sexual ability. The 20/80 rule forces her and other Staceys to compete over the Chad.
She needs an opinion that isn't from her jealous friend or Chad. A second opinion, or reaction, that accurately shows her sexual market value.
Every qt goes through this stage. Some get out of it feeling like 10/10s. Others aren't as 10/10 and do it multiple times to desperately confirm their value. If this happens to you, it means they think your the lowest in the social heirarchy.
They're more comfortable around us than when they're around Chad with 4 other Staceys and intense drama occurs about how they all deserve his cock when in reality Chad is fucking them all.
What's worse is there's not many counters to this dumb move.
Go all emotionless and she tells her friends how weird you are.
Tell her to stop acting slutty and she screams mysogyny with whiteknights ready to defend her honor.
Be a little nervous and she's happy now.
The only defense against her is to return her flirty messages to embarass her.
If you're super ugly, this works better. If you're moderately attractive, DONT. She'll bitch about how perverted you are to her friends because your not as good looking as her. She will also be validated more than usual because your attractive. The emotionless route is best for 7/10s and above.
Fucking roasties and their defense mechanisms. Its as if they're trying to get revenge on you for not making them feel special.
>>27754778
Does God exists?
>>27759294
>being this autistic
Look at >>27769268
>tfw your life virtually ended at 18
why do I feel so empty?
>got absolutely hammered last night
>was notably fucked up, but kept taking shot upon shot
>everything was great
>eventually shriveled up like a fucking prune
>cold and hyperventilating, couldn't breathe
I can't delude myself anymore, I'm a fucking lonely bastard. my realization of this was so impacting i could not fucking breathe. a few minutes after this episode i went and passed the fuck out on my bed. worst experience i have had with alcohol...and the thing is i know ill be back for more
>>27768573
(you)
blboxoxox
>>27769435
Stop destroying your body anon it's not going to help anything
>Your family hates you
>You have no friends
>You're a college dropout
>You're poor
>You're depressed
>You talk to yourself
>You can't see without a spectacles
me_irl feels. How can I make my life better?
>>27769577
I talk to myself in public too
>>27769639
People in public will call me crazy, stupid, mental, laugh at me, when they hear and see me talking to myself in public
>>27769535
>it's not going to help anything
and neither will maintaining it. i lead a healthy lifestyle, save for the fact i desire alcohol. why give a fuck
>>27769784
You are correct. It takes years to die from alcohol anyway. You might as well enjoy it.
>>27769577
I want to commit suicide, but I fear the possibility of me going to hell after death and staying there for an eternity because it's the punishment for me committing suicide
>>27754872
I stopped using proper accounts long ago. This is why I just stick to 4chan. I'm anonymous. Nobody can get to me. Nobody to check out my history. I've gotten myself banned on my account forums so they can't get me.
>>27769811
i will certainly try. cheers anon
What's the best way to commit suicide?
>mfw when my crush hooked up with my friend
>>27769866
Most effective is putting a shotgun in your mouth and pulling the trigger, a pistol is also very effective.
If that's not an option then hanging tends to work well, as does jumping in front of a train but you're probably going to traumatize other people if you do that. Same for jumping from something tall.
Stay away from overdoses/drinking bleach etc. It's much less effective with the vast majority of people surviving drug overdoses.
If you want something painless look into exit bags, though it's much harder to get pure helium now because of people using exit bags. There's also stuff like deliberate carbon monoxide poisoning though the effectiveness is up for debate.
Take a look at this website: http://lostallhope.com/
>tfw no gf
I'm 23 now, I'm not a virgin though if fucking a hooker counts
>>27769898
fuck outta here normieshitter
>>27754872
>tfw the government pays extra attention to 4chan because we say things here that we wouldn't on normiebook, and if you ever go for an important position in the government, this stuff will be used to blackmail you to step down.
>tfw trying to stay sober from both opiates and benzodiazepines
Sober reality isn't nice.
>>27769964
Thanks anon. Have you attempted a suicide before?
>I like anime and manga
>>27760446
At least you have a dad who cares for you enough to pay for your college you ungrateful piece of shit. I don't care how depressed you may get. You fucking try your hardest and pass your classes. Make your dad proud of you. If you fuck this up you're literally human scum.
>>27769866
Just jump from a very high spot familia
Thats what im going to do tonight
But remember
Try to land on your head or its all for nothing
>>27770189
>tfw I fucked this up
>>27769859
But doesn't it make you feel like shit physically and mentally?
I'm getting oneitis again
hold me please r9k
I don't want to cry anymore
>>27770411
This too shall pass...
She'll pass you by. regardless of your efforts or attempts.
One day you will pass away... And feel the glorious nothing that you deserved all along.
>my first bike and cell phone got stolen just a few days after I bought it
This was in high school
>Meet the coolest person ever from r9k
>fuck it up after one day because of one dumb lie
>can't stop thinking about all the ways you could have prevented this
>tfw I'll never talk to them again
>>27770496
>dumb lie
What the hell did you lie about?
>>27770451
what makes me even sadder is that I might have a shot, I've kissed her before, and she calls me "angel"
too bad there are lots of things she doesn't know about me
>>27754778
>get a job 40-60 hours a week at 36/h +overtime
>did therapy for social skills
>currently saving for my second surgery so I can start some form of exercise but its mostly just a goal to keep me from suicide
>created a mask and ive finally associated feelings to actions
>still feel empty as ever nothing has changed outside of my outward appearance
>sex with girls at 25 really isnt fun, even fucking trannies or topping a black guy is just a chore
>anti depressants dont help they just make it easier to will myself to do a thing i think of without feeling anything
>I get as much satisfaction out of doing something as I do just sitting around
I made it lads I went from a miserable robot who shit in the corner to a miserable chad who can fuck anything and not a thing has changed.
>>27770529
I wanted to be someone that they would like to talk to, so I lied and said I didn't have a gf so I would sound like more of a robot, and when she found out, it destroyed her. I feel so bad and want to explain myself, but I can't talk to her because I got blocked on literally everything. But whatever, she wouldn't ever want to talk to me ever again anyways.
>>27770573
Why are you lying to yourself, anon?
>>27770598
Oh fuck off failed normie shit.
>>27770598
You're a faggot and I hope you die a painful death.
>>27770605
Bored mostly i really have nothing to do after construction work besides sit around the house and wait for work to start again
>>27770598
True robots shouldn't turn their backs to the failed normies/demi-robots out there
I've been bullied my whole life and was alone
I'm not KV anymore, does that make me any closer to normie life? no it doesn't
>>27770639
>you have a job
Why are you here?
>Samefag posts
>>27770371
nah, anon. I don't get hangovers. and when im fucking blasted i get rushed with euphoria. it's the greatest feeling in life and the only way i find true happiness. and for this i must pay the price of deteriorating my body
>>27755135
I just use a teddy bear :3
>>27771071
You're a huge faggot too, manchild?
Fuck, Saturday and Sunday mornings are fucking pointless.
All of them taking photos in a club, posting how much fun they had last night. I don't get it. I guess being drunk and dancing is good, but why do people like to do it every week like it's the best thing ever? Pretty sure I'm the problem since everybody else and their mother like to do it. That shit looks boring. Why do I dislike partying so much?
>you seem to have a problem with maintaining eye contact anon
ugh...
>>27771143
because you're a beta?
>>27771143
Alcohol is boring. I do like a different drug every week. Just found some mxp hiding in my keyboard
>tfw saw a former friend of mine that used to be the group's punching bag and he's really dumb and even he has a gf
>>27770794
What else would I do after work?
>drive 1hr to and from work
>work 10hr
>come home
>vidya boring, sports boring, all the good hookers are trying to be born against christians on sunday
i have nothing else to do besides posting shitty pretend threads about being an upset robot with no problems
>>27771205
You're an Australian?
>>27754778
>moms birthday soon
>dont want to listen all this shity questions about gf, better job etc.
>>27771409
You should get a better gf and a job
>>27771468
He wouldn't. He's busy
>>27759639
only thing i could think of
>>27754778
>tfw I will never be good, let alone the best at anything
>tfw I don't know whether the bad things in my life are my fault or not
>tfw after a long period of no free time, I finally have a bit of time to do what I want but I realize that I don't even want to do what I thought I liked doing.
>tfw If my life continues being or getting shittier I will likely have to kill myself by age 50.
>tfw I think I could be good friends with people in another Major
I'm relatively outgoing, but none of these science geeks care about art.
Just kill me, famablam
>>27760446
Where's this quote from?
