I do not give a fuck how awkward it will be meeting up with someone, all i have my eyes on is me changing, and i think having someone to do it with will give me the motivation. The awkwardness is nothing compared to my sense of urgency. I really dont care about the awkwardness(really), i cant let myself waste time having feelings of awkwardness stop me; do you care about running away outside naked if some random person tries to kill you while you are browsing r9k naked?

From 2008 - 2011. I tried changing on my own. In short i couldn't do it and when i do i cant sustain it for more than a week. I disappoint myself with my own incompetence and every month/year that passes i am confronted with that incompetence and the time wasted.
Perspective- A university degree takes 3 years. My former high school peers finished their degree while i had the full 16 hour waking day to myself and i end up achieving nothing useful.

>>27221013
In late 2011 i went to see a psychiatrist because, i want to know why the fuck couldn't i get things done. To keep it relevant, he prescribed me Lexapro -acts as both anti-depressant and anti-anxiety- i felt better, less suicidal, was able to muster up the emotional energy to converse with my younger cousins, less hatred towards the world, less filled with desire for revenge, until they were eventually gone and i was carefree and nonchalant, being able to accept my useless self, but still failing to achieve anything i ever tried, BUT STILL able to accept my useless self. Eventually i was prescribed Ritalin; in short, unhelpful. (if you're reading this and want my Ritalin and if you're from Sydney, ill trade you something for it; I'm quite flexible as to what i want, you never know you might have something that interests me).

Then, in January 2016, my psychiatrist switched me from Lexapro to Paxil. I weaned off Lexapro completely before taking Paxil, i noticed i feel more alive, determined, free, less subdued; like how i was before i took Lexapro. I took Paxil until mid-February, i then decided to stop taking it as i feel the anti-depressants just subdued my mind so it would prevent me from eventually killing myself if i had not been on it. I feel that the anti-depressants has done its job to subdue my negative thoughts, suicidal ideation, hatred. Its been 5 years since being on Lexapro and i have been off anti-depressants for a month. Other factors considering, which i will not bother mentioning, the point is my external situation and my mind has both improved enough for me to say "i think now's the time".

Just letting you know that i'm reading the thread.

>>27221052
This time, i cant let stupid useless bullshit stop me. I have to try whatever means possible, no matter how ineffective it may appear, If i feel it has a good chance of working i will have to try it. I can't just do what I've been doing for the past 8 years. Now that things are better for me, i must improve now before i fall back into my negative state which will then lead me to go back on anti-depressants. There's a time limit before i will probably have to go back on it again. One of my ideas will involve having another robot with a strong and urgent desire to change.
(I will not reveal my other ideas as i feel that revealing them will make me less likely to do them as i will only be jerking myself off bragging how glorious my plans are)
>>27221065
All that manipulation you fucking better

Give some (you)s and Sydney browsers respond

man i would gladly help you out irl if i was in Australia...

All i can do is tell you that you're on the right path, admitting your mistakes is the first step to correcting them.

how old are you btw? did you get your highschool degree?
i know it's literally a meme nowadays but you should pick up lifting if you haven't already, it's what really forced me personally to change to the better, and most importantly is the diet aspect, eat healthier and get more sleep, that will help balance your hormones, and you don't have to join a gym if you feel it's going to be intimidating or anything, just get yourself a set of weights and do it at your home.

and next on the line is to find a job that can force you into socializing, don't go for something socially demanding though you'll stress yourself out that way, pick something easy you don't want to burn out in the first day, even if it's in a fast food joint, remember that money isn't on the highest demand here.

it's the small changes that makes you carry on your plan, so don't think today or tomorrow but next year or 10.

hopefully what i said can aid you.

tell me anon, what's your plans/ideas?

Inside of agony
Those butterflies crying out
Crying in decay
So God help them fly away

>>27221434
Thanks or the bum now i wait for someone from Sydney, like a spider waiting on its web

Need yous NOW

op should kill himself.

>>27221738

omg shut up you sperglord

>>27221774
nice dubs
origamidesudesu

>>27221738
Yea... I dont feel like it. Give me a year maybe, if i eont get my shit fixed.
I still get neetbux. So i have value there

>>27221809
stop posting here dude, you'll face nothing but a crab mentality.

>http://www.meetup.com/cities/au/sydney/

you'll find more of what you need there than here.

>>27221850
Im not even affected. Really if im willing to find and meet up with robots, it means im mentally prepared. And my mental state is stable; like an ipad on 99% battery, and the anti-depressant is when i recharge, except i wont be recharging

>>27221891
>ill find a robot there

Maybe a tennis partner.

dubs op kills himself.

>>27222030
OP LIVES ON AS A LEGEND
IT IS YOUR FATE

>>27222030
Reroll aingles op will fail
Djjejdj

More yous
Jyyj

Pls rdgh