>mfw I finally got my oneitis
>mfw I'm still apathetic
>mfw I got a gf but will never be able to return her feelings due to the severity of my depression
I know what you mean. There is a girl I have been dating for a little while who is really affectionate to me and definitely would qualify as my oneitis. Only..I can objectively see I am incapable of doing her any good because my emotional instability and rampant personality disorders have rendered me a 29 year old, drug addicted community college drop out who recently has had to move in with relatives.
At this point it almost feels like a mockery when she tells me that she loves me...This morning I am considering taking responsibility, telling her in a forthright way that I am in no state to be a decent partner, that this does not change the fact that I love her, but that love is more than feelings and a life with me as I am would be terrible at best. I know this is true because my history of exacerbating or creating problems in the lives of ex girlfriends. It sucks, but I feel like I need to man the fuck up and not give this beautiful and intelligent person any share in my misery.
anyone else /charmingpsychopath/ here? it sucks when you finally realize it and have to face the kind of self sacrifice your neuro-chemistry absolutely despises.
Failed normies, that's what you get
>>26671093
>>26671204
Well are you just the biggest faggot in the universe? Stop being a pussy.
Only because he's black, racist douche OP.
>>26671247
How is being accountable for very real problems and not wanting to inflict them on others being a pussy? Why are you trying to justify antisocial behavior with the muh masuclinity meme?
>>26671286
>>26671247
Actually, I've told her about my apathy and worries, and she actually told me that she wasn't going to leave me, and that she wanted to be here for me.
Feels pretty bad that I can't return her feelings, makes me feel guilty and selfish.
>>26671377
fuck off and killyourself originally
>>26671377
Tbqhwyf it is selfish and you are right to feel guilty. This is the conclusion i have reached with my gf. And she does the same thing, in fact I tried to own up to this before and she cried until i backed out. She isn't perfect, and probably has some weird social problems as well which is why i think she is okay with how awful i am...but that is beside the point. I can't say what you should do but I am thinking that I should take responsibility and walk away even if she is hurt for a while it is far better than the kind of pain I could cause her over a longer period of time. Idk man r9k might actually be making me feel worse than I should.
>>26671204
>charming psychopath
>attempting to spin your autism with "psychopathy" to appear edgy and dangerous
No you're just a faggot
>>26671463
>Idk man r9k might actually be making me feel worse than I should.
That's literally all this board is, one giant circle jerk of miserable people who love each others company. Hell even the normalfags such as yourself set up camp here because it makes you feel better to see people who are further in the dumps than you are (please leave though it was so much better without you guys). This board is literally a bottomless pit of despair and self-loathing of course it's going to make you feel like shit.
>>26671471
if you think psychopathy is edgy and dangerous and anything but being literally mentally retarded then you are the 13 year old edgelord anon...ASPD sucks so much. It is like autism except you end up with a huge criminal record and drug problems. At least autists can enjoy the sweet NEET lifestyle and sperg out over their interests.
>>26671517
/r9k/ makes me laugh more than most other boards; but it definitely reinforces some negative thinking. I'm really not a normie..even though im not a KHV i am a fucking hopeless loser
>be a depressed little bitch
>acquire perfect qt virgin robot gf
>she tries to help
>i drag her through hell
>she cucks me
>broken as a result, but got over being such a little faggot
>another femanon starts liking me
>can't return feelings despite seeing no glaring flaws in her and we can get along
>oneitis returns after a year of no contact and starts talking to me constantly
>no feels towards her either
>other robot orbiting me
>no feels for her either
>my fucking face when just four years ago I never even talked to a girl properly and now i don't want any of them
>>26671636
people who told you that getting a gf would help you with your own problems were either lying or ignorant.
>>26671377
>she actually told me that she wasn't going to leave me
:)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
>>26671701
That wasn't the point and most robots know this. I knew this before I even got the idealonlinegf.
It's about not being able to feel back anything any more. Absolutely anything. I was a romantic before and now I'm nothing. No attachment, no crushing, no infatuation, no desire, no ego stroking, no compassion, absolutely fucking nothing.
Being cucked so hard made me unable to feel towards women. I'm not a misogynist, I just don't see them as anything valuable or extra. I just put them in line with other introvert views.
>>26671740
Romantic isn't really an emotion. It sounds like you are just jaded. That will fade with time unless you feed it.
>>26671740
>I just don't see them as anything valuable or extra
but that was always the truth. just that before that experience you were projecting your personal perfections over them, now you see them as what they are. just normal people like everyone else. actually u might not be reached to that stage yet. it might be just the after trauma effect. after years you might probly expect what you were expecting before from them again.
>>26671794
>Romantic isn't really an emotion
Never said it was. I just didn't want to write out a list of what I felt and now don't.
>It sounds like you are just jaded.
Very likely.
>That will fade with time unless you feed it.
I got over the ex, don't hate women, not feeding it. It hasn't gone away even a bit almost a year later.
I tried having a gf, didn't work out, no need to do it again in my eyes. No real bitterness, I believe. i don't seek relationships out of not wanting them, not out of fear of being hurt again.
>>26671816
Yes, you're correct, I agree. It's how partners/women should be viewed. I'm just saying I feel no twinge of emotion towards relationships or any romantic notions, even towards decent grills that like me, or even the one I became infatuated with for the first time in my life. Nothing appealing or things I need. I was always alone and can continue to be alone, nothing to be gained from relationships any more. No warm and fuzzy feelings inside, absolutely nothing. It's like my emotions are sterile and pragmatic.
>>26671896
A year is not so long, really. I wish that I could say your state of mind is a good thing, like a revelation, but I totally understand why it seems like something good was lost. You are probably better off...romance is largely a falsehood used to sell all kinds of bullshit to men and women.
>>26671957
I want the feelings back mainly because I enjoy being alive now that I'm not so depressed. I want to experience everything related to being close to someone, but it's just not in my.
Also I don't see romance as something negative, as a monster of sorts. It makes sense, it's nice and beautiful. I'm just not capable. Helps being pragmatic but that gets tiring sometimes, frustrating.
>>26671995
Hm you should try MDMA...also maybe anti-depressants like Zoloft...get your seratonin working overtime breh. I know what you mean though, i've become so accustomed to failure that i can't remember the last time that i was actually *afraid* to lose something. Adaptation is kind of a pathetic thing. Or as Raskolnikov said: "Man can get used to anything, the scoundrel."
>>26672100
I might try it when I get more bux. thanks for the reply. AndDostoyevsky is based.
