i FINALLY DID IT ROBOTS!
I GOT LAID AND IT WASNT A HOOKER
>be 23 hkv
>5'8 average build if not a bit skinny
>walking erratically around campus
>almost on the verge of tears because of all the normies walking around and talking with each other when i struggle to even say hi
>spot a qt girl
>she smiles
>for some reason i think i have something on my beard so i start stroking it to remove anything it might have stuck on it (started growing one 4 months ago on a desperate attempt to get laid if i had one)
>start sperging around
>remember she smiled at me
>try to force a smile back
>it comes out but it must have been spergy as fuck because she just bursted out laughing as i did it
>heart sinks and thoughts of suicide plague my head
>see her approaching me
>heart starts racing but just stand there waiting for her to just strike me with the killing blow that will force me into suicide that very day
>she actually says hey do i know you from somewhere
>manage to reply no, this is the first time i've seen you
>smiles for some reason and then asks me if im busy
>tell her no
>she says shes having lunch and if i can accompany her
>at this point i'm thinking its some kind of prank but agree anyway
>we have lunch and she makes most of the conversation i just sit in front of her listening to whatever she says
>heart is racing and i'm sweating a lot, keep asking her if the AC is broken or something because its so hot and she giggles everytime
>finish lunch and she says she has to go and asks me for my phone
>i actually gave her my physical phone
>she laughs loudly and says she just wanted my number
>somehow manage to respond: Y-yeah i knew i just wanted you to type it
>she lets me know the phone is blocked
>put the pattern pasword and hand it back to her
>she puts her phone and tells me to call her there so she could have my phone
>hugs me as she leaves
>>26376758
>at this point i'm on the verge of tears of joy
>can't stop smiling
>this is the best day of my life
>go back home and play videogames but can't stop thinking about the girl
>8:00pm
>someone is calling
>its the girl
>asks me if i'm doing something
>she actually asks me to come over to her place and have dinner with her
>arrive there like 30 minutes later because i don't have a car
>says she thought i wasn't coming
>i smile
>as i enter she grabs my hand and leads me to her couch
>puts some girl movie and sits down really close to me and is leaning on me
>i'm sweating and wondering what to do next
>after almost 30 minutes of wanting to do it i finally move my arm around her to hug her
>she leans towards me more
>turns her head towards me and smiles
>i smile back
>she starts getting close
>i'm almost dying of happiness on my mind
>actually kiss her and doesnt feel awkward at all
>we start kissing a lot more at this point i have a huge boner
>she puts her hand on my dick area
>feels the raging boner
>zips my pants down unbuttons my pants and takes my dick out
>we're still kissing
>she goes down on my dick without a fucking warning
>im touching her tits
>she's wearing a skirt so i actually removed her panties from below without saying anything
>touch her pussy and shes wet as fuck
>press my dick against her pussy and it goes in
>last like 25 minutes and shes exhausted
>cum inside her and she tells me she's on the pill
>cuddle afterwards
>sleep at her place and go to school feeling like a new man next day (today)
i finally did it, am i a normie now?
>>26376758
>I GOT LAID AND IT WASNT A HOOKER
NORMIES LEAVE NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>>/facebook/
Was waiting for this to turn into a Fresh Prince or open the door, get on the floor etc.
Instead it was just a run of the mill fake story. Disappointing.
>>26376768
>i finally did it, am i a normie now?
Did what, got picked up by a girl who has unprotected sex with guys she's known for not even a day? Yes, you did. How many guys do you think she does this with every week? Maybe just one? Two? Three?
If I were you I'd get a std test soon.
Congratulations, man.
Have you spoken to her since? It seemed like she was more interested than a one night stand since she asked you out to lunch. One night stands are usually dinner or drinks after dinner.
Was she on top? I remember trying to explain my first time how I wanted her on top mostly cause I had no idea what motions to make.
>>26376768 Congrats Loser
>>26376758
Good job, son.
Always knew you'd make it.
Don't let the wizards and shitposters diminish your victory.
We're proud of you.
>>26376758
>>26376768
>didn't get affirmative consent
You gonna get rape charges
>>26376758
>>26376768
On the one hand, congrats OP, I'm genuinely happy for you
But on the other hand, I'm depressed for society. When the hell did women become so obscenely slutty? The worst part about this story is that it's believable, it's ridiculous how many women will ride the dick of any guy they meet that day because he gives them tingles.
I want to go back in time and live in a world where getting a first kiss takes multiple dates and sex is unheard of without extreme commitment. I've had a few one night stands and just felt like dirty shit the next day, thinking of how many other guys got it just as easily as I did.
>>26376859
>tfw probably true
>>26376862
yeah we have texted since it happened but i don't really want her as a GF because of what the previous anon said
we did it on her couch at first and then literally on the floor because the couch could not fit both of us, i was on top of her we both had our shirts on and i just had my pants down
>>26376927
>tfw she could claim rape and it would appear as true
How was it? Did you blow her mind or did you suffer from a limp dick and premature ejaculation?
>>26376968
dick went from extremely hard to semi to hard to super hard to semi a lot of times, its like 20 cm fully erect so when tis semi its still like 17-18 i dont think she noticed anything wrong with it
The physical feeling was good even great, but what i got out of it the most is that i'm not a virgin anymore, its that mental liberation that i can die today and i wont die a virgin.
>>26376758
>>26376768
Very happy for you anon on one hand like others here also say. But also jealous and sad because I know this will never happen to me. It seems like a movie, hard to understand shit like this happens IRL
>>26376964
I used to think only chads could get laid like that
>mfw just b urself guys were right
>>26377042
>mfw i thought the same as you
>in less than 12 hours i lost my hug, held hand, kiss and virginity cards
>>26376768
How does sex feel? is it better than masturbatin?
>>26377258
stoned fapping >>>>>>>>>> sober sex
everybody knows that
>>26377258
Yes but cummin feels the same, getting there is much more enjoyable though
Although i wished i had done more dirty shit it was probably for the best.
>>26376758
I'm personally glad anon, sad that you could have not waited a paltry 7 more years to gain wizard powers.
>be 29, depressed sucidial virgin faggot
>however, all of my life, my one love was technology, technical applicances, computers etc
>decide on my 30th birthday to go out to a bar
>literally an hour before midnight hits, the fucking hottest whores I've ever seen came up
>told me they wanted to have some fun, lead me to their apartment
>"Holy fuck it's happening im getting laid tonight"
>They lead me to their bedroom, start taking off their clothes, my dick is fucking diamonds
>all of the sudden, demonic wings and horns sprout from their bodies
>they lunge at me
>natural wizard instinct kicks in, and I dodge and use latent technomancer powers to stun them with electricity with the power outlet
>all of the sudden, the room fills with smoke
>the shadows of the succubi quickly vanish with a plume of flame
>the smoke clears up, and there's a middle-aged guy in a lab-coat robe with vials of different liquids in a belt around his waist
>introduces himself as the lead chemimancer, shows me all these cool chemistry tricks
>he was sent by the grandmaster wizard apparently, my talent was too great to let vanish to succubi
>invites me to the local wizard guild, and my studies began
So far, I'm a level 32 technomancer, I learned more in two years than I did in twenty, finally I have a purpose, to research and find a way to banish succibi and normies from this world with the help of my wizard guild mates.
Sad, that normies cannot experience such a thing, but they live their extremely short lives in pure, blind hedonism, like animals.
You can't blame an animal for following the natural instinct of eat-fuck-sleep, now can you?
how does a vagina feel?
>>26377359
like a warm, wet hole that's gently pressing around your dick
>>26376768
nigga she gave you the clap lmao. no girl that doesnt have aids would fuck a guy she met within the same day
>>26377383
why is that better than fuckin my pillow?
I'm 19 kv, and honeslty, I just assume whenever I see a girl smile at me it is because she caught me looking at her and is smiling out of being creeped out.
>>26377409
Because it's warmer and feels better. Also, your pillow can't suck your dick. Neither can it kiss you.
Also, there's no nice body attached to your pillow hole.
>>26377016
>20cm=7.874 inches
>tfw below average
Damn, had a hope spot for manlet me too, oh well
>>26377330
>tfw I will never get wizard powers because I had a drunken one night stand with a hippo when I was 26
It wasn't even enjoyable, I had to close my eyes because she was so ugly and I felt sick to my stomach for like a week afterward...but I was so desperate to not be a virgin that I did it anyway.
If I got to live a Chad lifestyle it might be worth giving up the powers, but not like this...not like this
>>26377456
the size played no part because she couldn't know beforehand
>>26377505
Oh, actually I was referring to not being laughed at when the pants come off, and the sex not being as good as it could be
>>26377468
In my studies, I heard of a ritual that could cleanse demonic residue from the spirit of a true wizard.
However, it is extremely difficult.
Firstly, you must mind a way to access the astral realm, depending on your latent wizard class, it could be difficult to reach the medatative levels required for entry, as it was for me.
Next, you must find the astral realm which contains the tree of kaballah, again, this could be potentially difficult, but there are a few kind astral wizards and monks out there willing to lend a hand to people.
Next, you must venture to the top of the tree, and meet with a vassal of "The One" (Hermes Trismegistus).
The vassal spirit will assign to you a task that alings with your class, but seems nearly impossible, this is done so that you may discover for yourself, if you are a true wizard or not.
If you complete the task, the demonic residue will be cleaned from your spirit, and you may know wizardy.
Be warned, this may not happen more than once.
Some wizards also have a stigma against cleansed wizards, but this is natural.
You could also become a warlock, but I cannot speak of them unfortunately, not here at least, they are forbidden to speak of to the unenlightened.
>>26377707
What if the ritual fails?
Can you "die" and just be stuck in limbo until the end of times?
I suppose there must be some kind of consequence for those who attempt wizardom and fail, otherwise everyone would try don't you think?
>>26376964
That's a time that never existed.
Summon her to you as I wish I could then a merry threesome would take place, oh such a sweet dream
>>26377789
Common left wing lie
Sluts always existed, sure. And teens always had premarital sex. But nowhere near to this extent.
Sluts used to be a rarity, like less than 5% of girls would fuck a guy on the first date. Now it's more like 90+%. The girls who fucked their boyfriends in high school for the most part did it after months of dating and sure as hell wouldn't have any other partners.
Now it's completely common for a girl to have 20+ partners by the time she finishes her freshman year of college.
>>26378451
nice stats, what kind of stuff do you pull out of you assholes m8 :^)
also
>except for you
>>26376758
rEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
NORMIE OUTTTTTTyou made it bro
>people literally walk outside and just fall into pussy
this isn't my reality, i refuse to believe it happens
>>26376758
Lying faggot, this sounds like a very good fantasy though.
>>26378451
I think you have the wrong impression because the couple's parents would 'make an honest woman' out of any slag who got pregnant by forcing them to marry, giving the illusion of chastity. During ww2 cheating was rampant as women were left at home and run through by soldiers on leave and soldiers helped themselves to European whores.
>>26378628
this
it happens to everybody except me
>>26376758
Why would you come here just to rub it in our faces? Fuck you. I hate you.
>>26376758
congrats faggot now get out and don't come back.
>>26378721
this. sounds too good to be true unless OP was a turbochad all along.
>>26377707
how do you determine your latent wizard class?
