Oneitis is supposed to be bad for you, but unless you have a crush on a specific girl, how are you supposed to get into a meaningful relationship?
I've been on both sides of the spectrum. I've been the betafag worshiping his oneitis; and I've been the aloof guy who has 3 girls crushing on him, but did nothing because I didn't feel particularly strongly towards any one of them (I liked them, but didn't like any of them enough to choose between them. The egostroke felt better).
Is dating literally just one giant, shitty game of roulette where you have to ask random fuckers out on first dates to see if they're worth pursuing? Developing a good relationship seems next to impossible.
Robots won't know from experience, but at least in theory, how is it done?
KHHV btw.
you can have a crush, but oneitis is when you worship one chick and ignore everyone else
i'm not the oneitis type, i've never just been obsessed with one girl and follow her around and be friend zoned like that. thats just not me so i can't offer any real meaningful advice
but i've never had a crush for more than a few weeks or whatever that i couldn't just put on the back burner. like theres crushes i've had for a while, but i don't think about them. i don't fantasize about them. they're just there, and maybe i'm friends with those people, maybe i barely see them, but i'm not tripping over myself to do anything for them. if it ever happens cool, if not, well, c'est la fucking vie.
girls i've dated have for the most part been my friends before dating, but i wouldn't say for any of them i was obsessive or whatever. i don't really get the whole oneitis thing though so idk maybe i'm misunderstanding it.
OP, you should probably just attempt a relationship with the next possible girl that wants you just so you know what it's like.
And it isn't random at all. Before two people get involved in any way there is usually a lot of information exchanged and a lot of critereons have to be met, even if it's just visual and a short conversation. And then at the start of a relationship it's still two people feeling each other out to see if they are a good fit.
>>25199123
i think when most robots say they have "oneitis" theyre full of shit.
just thinking a girl is hot and obsessing over her shouldnt be considered oneitis. thats just hopeless daydreaming. i think you actually need to interact with them on a semi-regular basis. they can normiebook chat you, friendzone you, flirt with you; all that matters is that you have a nearly all-consuming crush on them that spills over irl, and which more or less is not reciprocated. its that component of "its theoretically possible" that makes oneitis so bad.
