>obscure feels thread
post confusing feels that you are currently having
>tfw im legitimately more excited about meeting my friends dog than I am my neice or my nephew
>tfw I really want a younger sister who looks up to me as her role model.
>tfw recently started a small niche youtube channel
>tfw everyone has been nothing but nice so far, incredibly so
>haven't gotten a single mean comment
>>28644125
Tfw I had a spontaneous adrenaline rush and I don't how I even got it
>>28644648
link it anon.
>>28644676
I don't want to act like a shill though. I've linked it here before, I don't want to do it all the time and be a faggot.
>>28644705
its not shilling, im asking you, you not trying to sell me a product.
>>28644125
>>tfw im legitimately more excited about meeting my friends dog than I am my neice or my nephew
that's normal
dogs are objectively better than humans as long as their owners didn't turn them into niggers or jews
>tfw preparing for the Second Civil War with commies but all I've been training with are swords
>>28644670
I've been getting these all day too. It's weird.
>mother tells me I was diagnosed with depression at age 8
>Was sent to a group session at one point for Anti social behaviour
>Had the cute little preppy girl dressed in black that grew up to chop a man's member off
>Had a boy there that killed himself
>Had a girl with autism or some shit
>Dad took me out and just played catch with me instead
I still remember this, because it tells me that I've always been like I am now.
>>28644717
Okay, well I guess that's okay then.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QYb7qOgBVwY
I don't monetize the videos and don't make money from it. If you see ads it's because they Youtube detected copyrighted content and added them for the content owner (Konami). Please use adblock if you're going to watch my videos because they don't deserve anything.
>>28644749
That's what happens when mothers try to make other people solve their kids' problems. Your dad did the right thing.
>get d's every semester
>fail academic standards requirements every semester
>write a successful dismissal appeal every semester
>get d's yet again this semester
>used up allowed dismissal appeal attempts
>registration status hasn't changed at all yet, normally changes to dismissed the day grades are finalized
>>28644771
You make weird mouth noises and it seems like you're talking in a hushed voice even though you are perfectly audible.
I like how informative you are even in the two minutes I've watched so far. You've hooked me in enough to make me want to finish this video at least. Good work over all.
>fail my high school literacy test
>Almost failed it the second time
I was born a fucking retard
I get you>>28644855
Kindred spirits
>>28644910
I had to get speech therapy in elementary school but I've gotten over most of my issues since then. I know I sound weird but I got the mic just for this so I sound a lot better in the later parts. By part 3 I sound more like a normal human being and talk louder, I had the mic way too close in the first two parts so it sounds a bit off.
Thank you for the kind words though, I hope you enjoy. The later parts are also much more filled with lore/references, considering the beginning of the game tends to just be building the basis for all of that.
>>28644125
im happy
I have never been happy before
All 3 of my friends are ignoring me
Im all alone
im poor as hell
but im finaly happy
i have a hobby i like
and im just happy
thanks for being there when my friends weren't, robots.
>>28644965
What is your hobby friend? I became happier despite being completely alone once I threw myself into my passions as well.
>>28644979
i picked up photography a few years ago.
i never really enjoyed it but i started doing it more in the past few weeks and it makes me happy
>come back home from a shoot
>edit pictures
>they look really good
>no text messages distracting me from editing
it's a good feel.
>>28645064
Sounds comfy my man. I'm glad you found something you can get immersed in and enjoy, plus it's creating something, which is all the better. I hope you stay happy man.
>tfw don't live in zootopia
It's childish but it just seems like a better world.
>>28645082
Thanks, anon.
What are your passions?
>>28645141
Oh just silly things. I'm the guy who made the youtube stuff up there. I really like studying and playing the same game over and over. For some reason it brings me joy.
>lost interest in vidya
>lost interest in running
>don't practice instrument anymore
>stopped opening up to people
>don't talk to family
>don't talk to friends very much
>started reading about u.s history
>checked out some books from library
>probably last me the next few weeks
i got this going for me, which is nice
>didn't study for calc. test
>Skip every other question because I don't know how to do it
>panicking
>also happen to have diarrhea
>panicking hard
>heartbeat is concussing me
>can't think past 'holy fuck I'm going to fail this test'
>30 minutes remaining
>averaging one question every 5 minutes so far
>turn pages to see how much left
>3 pages left
>not even close to done
>panic intensifies
>just about ready to shit my pants
>take a breather
>drink some water
>next question I actually understand and get
>go back to questions I skipped
>start whizzing through them
>they weren't even that difficult
>best feel that was ever feel'd
anybody else know this feeleroo? its a good feel
>get two interviews for careers I've always dreamed of
>both said no to me the next day after the in-person interview
I feel so dead inside it hurts
>tfw I'm almost finished recording my debut album and have put in a lot of work but I'm not confident in it
>>28644648
Silent Hill bro, that you? Make another thread tomorrow, family.
>overwatch in 6 days
>every day feels empty until then
>all life experiences feel hollow
>can only focus on those 6 days
why blizzard
>Female friend I don't have romantic feelings for but care deeply about is willingly re-entering an abusive relationship
I know "kill the Stacies" and everything but it's hard to watch since he fucked her up emotionally not even that long ago. When I tried to talk to her about it she got defensive with "it's my choice" and all that. She's normally smart and has common sense, I have no clue why she's doing it.
>Live at home at 21
>parents love having me around because they fucking hate each other and I'm the only child that actually listens to them
>Feel like shit staying at home with a job that could easily support me if I wasn't financially helping out a guy
>feel like said guy is just using me even though his issues are genuine and I've experienced firsthand
>feel like my life is on pause yet I keep getting older
I'm fine, I just wish my folks loved each other enough to let me go and this one guy would just GET A FUCKING JOB ALREADY HOLY SHIT I'V E BEEN HELPING HIM OUT FOR ALMOST TWO FUCKING YEARS JUST LET ME KEEP MY MONEY GODDAMMIT.
>>28646282
move out
cut that dude off
fuck everyone that aint you
>>28646327
I know i'm making excuses at this point.
I know I would just feel guilty if all I did was think about myself. I was raised to pretty much sacrifice everything I have to help others.
I just don't want to feel guilt.
Thanks for the advice though.
>>28645315
This is almost exactly me, except with books about microphones, acoustics, and soundwaves.
>>28646134
Link to band?
originality bot
>tfw I've lost interest in playing music
I've played guitars, bass, and a little piano for years, but it's just now enjoyable anymore. I don't know why. Nothing I play seems to sound good or gives me that feeling anymore.
>just got very lucrative job with room for upward mobility
>now I don't get to go North and work construction while living on-site for a few months
Literally all I was looking forward too this year
>>28644125
I really feel like I should want a girlfriend but I just don't. I don't know what I would do with one and if I imagine having one I feel like an idiot and really uncomfortable.
I'd rather get drunk while playing strange video games and listening to 80s music and ironically being a furfag on /s4s/ is that normal???
>>28646202
where do they live?
>>28644951
Good job Anon, i really liked the first video especially when you called that faggot a brain dead. Kek
>>28646499
I've got the same problem. Everything I play and write sounds the same. I always end up back at the same keys, playing similar riffs and melodies and styles.
When I try something different it just sounds horrible.
>>28646153
It's me friend. I can only make the threads once or twice a week because manning them and responding to everybody for 5 or 6 hours straight can be exhausting. That said, I'll make sure to make one soon. Maybe even tomorrow. Thank you for being nice to me.
>>28646769
Thank you, that means a lot dude I am glad you enjoy. I just want a good source for lore/trivia without having to study the wiki or watch Twin Perfect's videos. They're a bit self indulgent.
>tfw you find a solid gold swastika among your deceased German great-uncle's stuff, basically confirming your Nazi ancestry
>be in abusive relationship for a year
>finally break shit off
>finally feeling my feelings again
>they're all just obscure and hard to verbalize
>talk to friend
>"I feel more stable around you. like I'm a better person when you're here"
>"you're just different, you're really different from other people"
>feel worse
what
people like me and I know how to get close to others but they don't want to be close back. or they can't and I don't understand it
>read a cool webcomic
>the guy drawing this is a little inconsistant and only uploads twice a week
>there's a link to his tumblr, too bad that place is pretty much your got-to if you're making yourself known an artist
>likes steven universe and a lot of stupid shit
>his patreon earns him $1922 a month
>$1922 for a well drawn, well written comic but goddamn he uploads like 3 pages a month lately
>suddenly lose a lot of respect for this guy
you can't look up to anyone these days
>Had a scholarship while attending a private high school
>Had to keep high grades + do some community work to keep it
>Mom was always late with monthly payments
>Would usually get called out during classes to go sign some paperwork about late fees
>Anxiety about this increased over time, as our financial situation got worse
>Stress and anxiety kept piling on during my high school years
>Managed to graduate high school, been going to college for a year
>Our family's economy is better than ever, but I still feel a lot of anxiety over money
I can't believe that shit scarred me the way it did. It's been a whole year since I ended high school, and around a year and a half since our situation got better, but I still get anxious whenever money discussion is brought to the table.
>tfw every good idea I have involves copywrite infringement
>>28644771
>lore-play
so, a gameplay focused on the game story, sounds interesting m8, too bad i never cared for the silent hill but i'd def watch lore-plays of other games
>>28647304
what ideas do you have?
name a few
>>28644624
I think it's lack of sleep, but I read that as "model rocket". Thanks for the laugh
>>28645534
Yeah, that sudden burst of happiness when you start destroying a test. It is even better when you ace it.
>>28647276
>you can't look up to anyone these days
you never could
why do you look up at all? just look across
>>28647351
>I created a stream of seinfeld (http://shiggystream.com/) that was too successful for its own good with hundreds of viewers and I had to shut it down for a while because I got spooked that it would get shut down permanently with a C&D letter but now it's not very popular
>I sell hats with nostromo patches on them but I can never go big time because I can't just sell Alien merchandise like that
>>28647494
>I sell other peoples products
oh
>immediate family are all typical normies
>extroverted, zero self-awareness, great social skills, somewhat dumb, etc
>inherited none of those traits and instead ended up being a neurotic shut-in too self-conscious and insecure to do anything
>>28647646
>typical betafag
>le "normie" meme
Oh fuck off. This is supposed to be a thread about obscure feelings, not one where you come and whine about the same thing everyone does in 99% of the threads in /r9k/.
>>28647784
>not one where you come and whine about the same thing everyone does in 99% of the threads in /r9k/
but i'm not whining about not having a gf or a social life
>Read a fucked up doujin
>begin to cry
>thinking about human morality
I dunno. After a while, it just gets to me. It's one of those irrational feelings only humans experience
>I know the story isn't real
And yet, it makes me feel so sad. I think "Is this it? Are we all just monkeys parading themselves as something better? Why do any of us bother being nice to one another or trying to achieve dreams like traveling the world or getting stronger? Do we all deep down want nothing more than to fight and eat and sleep and fuck?"
Autism is a hell of a drug. This shit keeps happening now.
>>28644125
>tfw I'm excited to meet my parent's new pupper but horrified to meet my father, and mildly annoyed to see my mother.
>>28644624
damn nigga, this picture brings back memories
>flying out of the sun.....
>>28644125
>tfw you will never be a cute girl
Feels bad desu
>live with gf
>sleep together every night
>she frequently asks for sex and I decline
>go in the bathroom and jerk off to /gif/ on my phone
what the fuck is wrong with me
>tfw take a pizza out of the oven and feel tbe heat on my face, imagining the heat from my inevitable confrontation with jumping into a train
>started browsing /mu/
>obsessed with music for a while
>download 350 gb of shit I'll never listen to
>started browsing /fit/
>lift for a while
>drink lots of milk and get gassy
>started browsing /n/
>buy a 600 dollar bike which got stolen in less than a month
>/fa/
>got a dumb haircut and spent hundreds more on like 2 outfits
>/v/
>300 hours in souls
>/lit/
>read lots and start writing poetry
>get called pretentious for talking about joyce in public
why am I becoming 4chan
>tfw not even a robot or cyborg, just cynical and socially clumsy
>tfw when other boards are slow or filled with uninteresting threads i lurk here instead
>tfw this place is an inescapable cesspool and each time i come here for any other reason than shitposting everything here either annoys me or makes me hate myself alittle more
>wander around from board to board, but always end up here again
>help
>>28644771
>99999999 KB
>but you need 8 KB
>me and a friend start attending uni and move to a appartment with 6 other people (mostly girls)
>we bring a new life to it, we make people laugh and everyone likes us, we really become the heart
>but he's the more popular and charismatic one, i really just tag along
>one girl in particular is really into him (but he has a gf that he is committed too) and i am into her but although she does probably like me too she is into him way too much
>he is leaving the appartment as he is leaving the uni
wat happens now?
really the only outcome i can think of is that without his 'guidance' (for lack of better word) i will become awkward spaghetti tossing autist as that is exactly how my interactions with the other people without him present went
>>28648399
Pretty weird dude. Is your gf ugly or something? I would suggest you stop watching porn for a week and try doing the sex instead, if you never have sex she's going to break up with you sooner or later.
>>28644771
>he suffers from this condition called being mentally retarded
>I don't want to rag on him too much because it's obviously difficult for his family
Top lol
You are funny in an understated way. Keep making videos
>That feeling you get when beating up homeless people when they're sleeping and they wake up to pain
Anyone ever get really scared when you haven't slept for 3 or more days in a row and you have to go outside?
It's fucking scary
>>28646375
you should give the guy a deadline to get a job and if you would still feel guilty doing that you should help him get a job. Tell him that he can always come to you for help but you cant support him your whole life and he has to do somethings for himself at some point. I dont really know your situation but thats what i would do.
>>28646172
>lack cash to buy that fucker
>lack cash to upgrade pc to run it decently
>have to design a 3 two story flats for class by friday
>structural analysis test on friday
> air filter design due tommorow
>bunch of other obligations inthe background
I just wanna go back to the days of playing COD and watching anime sempai
>tfw you feel nothing at all really
>The only emotions that get evoked at this point is just fleeting joy that lasts for a minute tops from a funny video or just anger/sadness from random internal thoughts and fantasies of what could happen.
Eh fuck it, I don't even know what I'm doing anymore, here are some cute bunnies.
Spent some time with my young nephews and niece today, they had a great time and they love me for some reason
All I could think about the whole time was the fact that one day they're going to die and their flesh will rot off and their bones will turn to dust
>>28644125
>tfw can't justify living life without delusion
>tfw you know someone that is basically your ideal partner except that he's extremely depressed, apathetic as hell, and won't do anything about it
>>28651082
why don't you encourage him more? perhaps that's all he needs.
After all this lurking I realize I have something to contribute.
>Have this irrational fear of forgetting everything I've done during the prime of my life
>Not the big events, just those small, every day little interesting events that'll be completely forgotten by next week
>Not that I even do anything social or interesting anyways. But my internet life is interesting to me and that's all that matters. That's the point of a diary.
>New years resolution was to keep daily journal
>Successfully never miss a day until April 2nd
>Motivation to continue took a dive that day
>Only written two entries since then
>Slowly becoming more depressed as I fail to keep a log of my life
>All of these April and memories will be forever forgotten
I don't know. I'm a person who likes to cling to the past. I'm just worried about turning 50 years old and realizing that I can't remember the prime years of my life (Even if they were just playing vidya and hanging with "internet friends") But I've had a problem with motivation my entire life. Now that the streak has been broken, it's hard to feel like there's any point.
>>28644125
>tfw got dosbox and timidity to work together
>marathon playing the entire Uncharted series from 1 to 4 and just really craving adventure
>knowing I'll never get the chance to explore anything
Fuck this mundane shit
I can't even comprehend the thought that someone could ever love me for who I am and I don't know how I should feel about that.
My psyche is so messed up that I don't even know what it would be like for someone to want to spend time with me without it being necessarily convenient or being forced to.
If I got I girlfriend I wouldn't even know what to do because I have no idea what couples do.
I hide all of my feelings behind a layer or irony and sarcasm because inside I don't even know if there's a personality, let alone one that anyone would want to hang around for more than an hour at a time.
Help.
>>28644771
Don't be a faggot and monetize your videos. Going to binge watch your channel today.
>>28644125
Someone on /b/ posted a link to a life-quality test and I scored the lowest, at 1.8/10. (See pic.) People with much higher scores than me were talking about how horrible their lives were. My life doesn't seem so bad to me. It makes me wonder if my life is so consistently horrible that I've become accustomed to misery as "normal" and no longer notice it.
>>28644125
>walking to bathroom in 1st grade during class time
>teacher stops me and asks me what I'm doing
>going to bathroom teacher
>she yells at me to be more respectful
>taken back to class no bathroom break
>get put into special ed class for the next year
Why random teacher? Just why?
>tfw I prefer my fantasies to real life
>spend all my time writing them down
Now Mikey is on this board too? Jeez, things are getting weird... Hi Mikey!
>>28653276
Get off r9k. I know it seems like it's helping, but it's not. What you're doing is surrounding yourself with people just as damaged as you are, many of whom are here to keep other people miserable and unhappy because it's the only way they can feel better about their own lives.
Get out of the house and meet real people. Get a hobby, join a book reading circle, take some adult education classes. Do *something* which gets you circulating with real human beings. It may take a while, but you'll eventually find someone who finds your presence appealing -- but you'll have to risk rejection to do it. And you WILL be rejected over and over again before it happens.
But none of it will happen while you're sitting in r9k, insulating yourself in an echo chamber of dysfunction.
>>28647000
Be proud of your pure bloodlines then, anon!
>tfw I'm behind on all my college classes, completely bombed one of my exams and have about a month to make up 3 months of work
>tfw I'm not even all that stressed out because for once in my life I have friends and they're just as autistic as I am
I'm actually happy for once in my life.
>>28651258
I've tried. I've suggested he gets therapy, gets a job, I tell him that he's not useless/ugly/etc (he absolutely is not); but nothing works. I don't know if there's anything to do.
>tfw most of my waking thoughts are about preparing to lucid dream in the night
>tfw I have to do legitimate reality checks, not just to make it easier to lucid dream, but because sometimes I actually can't tell if I'm awake or not
>tfw losing touch with reality
>>28644125
iktf op
>havent been home in almost 10 months
>haven't seen friends or family (I'm actuslly really close to them and love them a lot)
>still more excited to seeing my cat
There's just no mistaking it. Animals > people.
