Fembots, describe your ideal guy
>>28202656
>female
>r9k inhabitant
pick one
>>28202656
I like short chubby guys
Gotta be cute though, and hairless
I like the idea of cuddling with a cute chubby little boy and have a short bf would be the closest without being a pedo.
>not much physically, just not obeast
>someone who can chill, smoke, talk politics/generally educated topic, play vidya, gets my depression, inspire me to be a better person, etc.
Just regular human stuff.
>also someone who can choke fuck me like a whore and a princess and beat me down verbally
That's the hard part to find...
>>28202656
I like guys who are smarter than me, use words I that I have to look up to know its meaning. Bonus if he works out as well.
>>28202656
Protective
Controlling
Loving
Attentive
Noble
Skins cats
STEM nerd
>>28202764
I'm tallish, chubby and relatively hairless.
Be my girlfriend.
>>28202656
His 13 cocks must be arranged around his waist like a sunflower and they must all stand up in unison when becoming erect.
The first one must be a golden brown color, 8 inches by 5, and ejaculates cream and chocolate with a 35/65 ratio.
The second must be a 1 by 1 inch asian micropenis with a constant layer of m&m flavored smegma
The third must had Charlie Sheen's coked out face for a head and must extend like a telescope for precisely 6.5 feet.
The 4th must be a black mamba schlong capable of acting as a fire hose in case of emergencies.[
The 5th must be a in a coiled spiral strictly following the Fibonacci sequence.
The 6th must be 9" by 7", white. Nothing fancy here.
The 7th must be a dazzling sunrise, the Morning Star, the Alpha and Omega, the Metatronic Kabbalah, the God of the Emerald Tablet and Proteus of the Sages.
The 8th must branch into 2 separate heads, actually, like a snake's. One head must protrude up at a 65 degree angle from the trunk of his body, the second, down 35.7 degrees.
The 9th must smell of Armani's Aqua di Gio and activated almonds at all times. Color: red, with streaks of purple.
The 10th can be anywhere from green to light orange, but the foreskin must be intact and has to stretch 3 inches further than the tip of the head in flaccid state.
The 11th must be the colour of Barack Obama's youngest daughter, and the inside of the urethra has to be lined with tiny, sharp teeth.
The 12th can be whatever, as long as it's not too thin.
The 13th penis must have long, one-dimensional spines capable of demonstrating the Kakeya Needle problem.
Otherwise he just has to shave and shower regularly and he can't be shorter than me or make less money.
>>28202847
I want the last part so bad too, I think it's an illness ;-;
>>28202847
dont smoke, dont like politics, dont play vidya
but i will whip you and choke you
are you my gf now?
>>28202656
Cute, slightly dope-y man servant/jester who would do anything for me and no one else
>>28202900
Finally, a girl who will not only accept me for who I am, but actually desires me. I'm yours girl.
>>28202894
>I'm tallish
Sorry I said I liked them short, not "tallish"
>relatively hairless
But not completely
Sorry anon, you'll find your gf one day
>>28202900
Holy shit I hope this is pasta.
>>28202992
I'm going to hunt you down and hurt you.Just kidding.Not really.
6'4" tall gay Swede
>>28202900
thread salvaged
desu desu (x4)
Hal from Malcolm in the Middle
I kinda have two
One would be
>quiet
>thoughtful
>stoic
>calm
>old fashioned
>really smart
>dry sense of humor
>goal oriented
>clean shaven
>with a tender side that he'd only show me
>lean but in an athletic basketball player sort of way
>Good with kids as a guardian
Or a guy who was
>Loud
>Passionate
>Defiant
>People oriented
>Friendly
>Goofy
>Flirts with girls but takes special time out for me
>Bit more muscular
>Good with kids as an energetic but gentle playmate
>Maybe has a beard
Feel free to shit on my taste
>>28202847
>>28202908
I have had sex where girls regularly let me and ask me choke them and hit , the hit part is meh for me, but they enjoyed, while I whisper to their ears how they become my personal cumbucket
also then i would cuddle.
I would also abuse verbally in other forms
But I don't feel confident (not that i have anyone to do it with in the first place) I do not talk about it irl ,because I am afraid it would backfire on me somehow.
>>28202912
I don't know this is all moving so fast.
Are you ready meet my emotionally controlling parents and move into my my totes adorbs lady basement? I'll clean the menstrual pads and hot water/sock condoms off the bed so we have a place to make love.
How many autistic children to you want to make senpai?
>>28203073
I can tell you watch a lot of anime.
>Flirts with girls but takes special time out for me
Why would you want this though? That is sick.
>>28202900
Taking the cock carousal to the next level I see.
>>28203073
what does dry sense of humor means?
>>28202900
>The 12th can be whatever, as long as it's not too thin.
Fucking whore
>>28203073
Omg I'm a little of both femanon
Where have you been my entire lif-oh yea you don't exist
>>28203101
Seriously you could tell me your we're gonna fill my pussy until it burst like a cheap water balloon and I'd still get into it if your tossed a few kink buzzwords in.
It's all about finding someone who doesn't give a shit if they sound retarded, because chances are most girls wouldn't even notice.
>>28203118
Nah, I'm more into western fiction
My taste in Chinese cartoons is entry level
>Why would I want this
To feel special I guess? Like, all the girls would gladly jump him but I'm the only one he really wants
>>28203073
>I want Chad
>or Chad
But what do you have to offer?
>>28203073
Hahaha, oh shit, this is fucking hilarious.
>>28202891
>Skins cats
I would skin you.
Not really, but I would strangle you for that.
>>28203073
Is deadpan the same as a dry sense of humor in some vein? Can't even be bothered with clean shaven when I hardly grow facial hair to begin with. Don't play basketball and not looking to start.
Doesnt do drugs
Occasinally drinks
Not a 'been there, done that' type
Willing to try things more than once
Into spontaneous events and doesnt care if its legal or not
Will help me and make me happy even if they know its wrong (ie spray painting someones car with me for revenge)
Nice teeth
Drinks mostly water
Well defined collar bones
Skinny or otter mode
Morbid sense of humour
>>28203131
Big sarcastic cunt who can make witty quips on the fly
>>28202847
You fucking s-slut be my gf right n-now pls
>>28203236
Too generic. How good looking 1-10 is your limit?
>>28203179
yes yes I get that the moment
Some time I rethink things that I think or say during heat, which is fun, sometime triggers the kink again.
But then again.
Many thing can go wrong.
I just feel it would backfire somehow
Is it me being autistic or would I go and bit into their ears, telling them how I want to rape their outer labia, lie the cheap scum semen place holder they are?
>>28203236
>Doesn't do drugs
>Nice teeth
>drinks mostly water
Welp, I lose on those. Fuck.
>>28203201
We're taking about ideals here, silly bastard
I'm not ugly, bitchy, or overweight
It's enough for most cunts
Not as though I'm running around chasing my mysterious brooding guy or defanged Chad
>>28203242
>>28203073
Your first Ideal guy
Is the Ideal guy I wanna become.
Fuck life.
>>28203114
why would you clean up the menstrual pads? i can always shove them in your mouth to shut you up
>>28202847
>likes politics and is generally educated
desu when a cisgirl says this i instantly am impressed before i come to the cold realisation that most girls say that but are actually like double digit iq, this goes for men too
Ive dated 2 guys who were serious history and politic faggots like me and only 1 girl but she still nearly wasn't as interested in them as i was
I want someone to listen to Dan Carlin and read political memoirs and shit with!
>>28203309
Id date a 5/10 or higher. Id never date anyone better looking than I am though (dat insecurity), so I probably would not date anyone 7.5/10+
I like blue or green eyes and dislike dark curly hair.
I don't really have an ideal kind of guy, but there was a tripfag from like a year or two ago with Russian characters as his name that seemed really cool. He lived in Maine and wanted to go to Central Asia, but he hasn't posted in a long time. ;_;
A lot of what he posted made me really go >tfw too so he was kind of close to ideal.
>>28203073
I know the EXACT type of cool-uncle you're talking about in the second one.
>>28203343
So Chad? Yeah, I think most guys wanna be that type of guy.
>>28202847
>>28203114
NEW ZEALAND
E
W
Z
E
A
L
A
N
Dblox
>>28202847
>gets my depression
fucking roasties
>>28202764
I'M 5'6 AND CHUBBY
I AM KINDA HAIRY (MY LEGS ARE VERY HAIRY) BUT I AM NOT LIKE ROBIN WILLIAMS OR ANYTHING
>>28202891
i like to pluck whiskers off cats but that's as far as i'll go babe.
>>28202847
I do all thaaaat thouuuughh
>>28203377
fuck off you kiwi faggot SHES MINE
go jerk off in your hobbit holes you faggot
>>28203375
Is that a Chad.
wouldn't know.
I just wanna be clean cut, down person, will get /fit/ trying to improve a little
>>28202847
>also someone who can choke fuck me like a whore and a princess and beat me down verbally
I could never do this shit. I'd feel guilty tying to hurt anyone on purpose for no reason, especially with the chance of hurting them really bad. I don't care if they're okay with the abuse, it isn't in my nature.
>likes politics
Never interests me, even though I should be involved. Not that it's hard to understand, just boring.
>>28203368
Strange. But at least you know yourself which would avoid issues in the future, good for you. Since you'd only date "below" would you consider cheating on them if you got bored?
>>28203375
Stereotypical Chads aren't like that
Chads wear TAPOUT shirts with sunglasses and say brah a lot while banging sluts
>>28203397
You can start by getting a clean cut and getting fit. Those are two variables you have absolute control over. The rest might come through confidence or some paradigm change.
Start tomorrow and build that disciple and try not to let your sad self overcome you.
Good luck man.
>>28203383
Sorry anon, NO HAIR, gotta be smooth like a little boy that hasn't gone through puberty.
>>28203444
God damn it this shit is like winning the fucking lottery
How will I ever get all 3 reqs? I am going to be alone forever.
>>28203410
No, I dont cheat. If I get tired or find a detrimental flaw to the relationship or just end up unhappy, Ill tell you why and then break up with you if nothing changes.
Thick black/dark brown hair
Long thick dark eyelashes
Hazel eyes, or dark green but any eye color is fine
Dimple(s)
Full rosy lips
Takes care of teeth, hair and generally good hygiene
Pale skin
Tall
Skinny, only slight muscles
>>28203422
You're thinking of "loud obnoxious douche Chad". The one anon posted was "introvert handsome Chad".
>>28203073
So basically Edward or Jacob?
>>28203444
>hasn't gone through puberty
Found the pedophile. Get the torches ready boys.
>>28203498
Kek. That was pretty good
>>28203461
It's okay anon, I'm sorry you're not my one but maybe another girl will love you.
>tfw you will never be someones ideal
JUSTclose the door on your way out
>>28203443
Thanks man, will do. I will start by fixing my sleep cycle which is fuck
Stop failing med school ( i guess this semester is lost now)
and get correct eating paterns.
Have 2 days whitout eating.
I can eat once every 2 days or something like coickies, but yet still no feel hunger.
however im not fit so i will get.
thanks for the good luck, I hope you the best too.
>>28203509
Can you not read?
>>28202764
Ofc I'm into little boys, but not gonna fish one out that wants pussy and risk going to jail.
That's why I like short hairless guys, the chubby part is just me liking fat guys.
>>28202908
>I want the last part so bad too, I think it's an illness ;-;
Same
>>28203528
Thanks, I guess.
Original fucking comment.
>my height or taller
>chubby or husky or a little builtfat but I don't like hard defined muscle
>I also like tall skinny guys
>beard and glasses
>has a modicum of hobbies he pursues
>has similar music taste to me
>not a picky eater but doesn't eat junk food
>likes to travel
>likes the idea of living on a homestead: eating from the garden, raising a few livestock, likes animals
>doesn't want kids
>kinky af
>>28203579
Sorry, still not into camwhores.
>>28203579
Last fm chart?
Also, what's your height?
>>28203594
I'm not a camwhore, you've mistaken me for someone you clearly have some anger towards
>>28203406
>I don't care if they're okay with the abuse, it isn't in my nature.
No I feel it, that's why it's an endless search, it's hard for a lot of people. Pretty much sub/dom relationships require a lot of "recovery time" because it is such an emotionally demanding relationship. Especially if you're drifting into DD/LG territory.
>Politics. Never interests me...just boring.
I just mostly want someone to bitch about candidate pandering and how this whole election just proves how much of a joke our political system is.
>>28203599
I don't use last fm, pleb
I'm5'11"
>>28202764
>I like short chubby guys
>Gotta be cute though, and hairless
Might wanna stick to dating asians.
>>28203543
>Have 2 days without eating.
Don't do that bud. It's actually worse and you gain weight that way because your metabolism slows down and body starts eating your muscles.
But yes. Fix your sleep cycle and eating habits. Try to cut cookies or surgery stuff out. I used to eat cookies like every week to treat myself from end of wageslaving. Now I have some Greek Yogurt or something else I enjoy and is also good.
Let go of this semester and work on yourself during the off months.
I need to go to bed now. Hope things work out for you.
>>28203549
Don't you ever fucking reply to me again you disgusting filth.
>>28203607
Hehe umad misogynist nerd umad umad ban pls ;)
>>28203579
what is this of girls wanting something specific about guys and their hobbies?
I have tried all my life to hardly hide the powerlvl of all my hobbies what the actual fuck?
>>28203326
I cant control myself around soda.
I have this oral hygiene neurosis
Ithink that drugs make people lazy and use them like a crutch. Plus I dont like it when they share pipes or bongs because it seems so intimate and I dont like indirect kisses (oral neurosis kicks in and makes me want to bash my forehead agaisnt a wall)
>>28202908
>I want the last part so bad too, I think it's an illness ;-;
after trying to look for a guy or even a girl who was capable of psychologically dominating me without being abusive as fuck for a very long time, it's basically rare as fuck. it's really all ive ever wanted too
generally men who act like that will almost 99% of the time be super abusive because of insecurities, and not the good kind of abuse either. either that or they slowly stop acting like that once they get 'comfortable' with you. it's hell
its much better to just be dominant and live vicariously through the people you treat like you wish you got treated like T B H
>>28203549
>That's why I like short hairless guys, the chubby part is just me liking fat guys.
Where are you from? I'll cover myself in hair remover
>>28203653
what are you trying to say?
blox
>>28203624
>tfw will never know your tastes
>tfw manlet
WELP!
what a Polite, well manered, correct young man, thank you for making my evening.
I'll make it.
>>28203638
>>28202656
>he regularly posts in r9k
>he's not a normie
>he has never had a gf
>he's a kv
>he doesnt like traps
>he will take my virginity and marry me
>he will never cheat on me
>>28203632
>chunny Asians
Ew, they look gross.
I prefer whites.
>>28202891
I hate cats. Which STEM
Smart
Kinda weird or nerdy
No drugs, smokes, or anger problems
Somewhat feminine in looks and personality
Skelly or thinnish
Pale
Pure innocent heart
>>28203714
*chubby
Original Comment tbo
>>28203740
Where are you from?
very original comment from me
>>28203749
>Where are you from?
Indiana
>>28203696
IDK
in this kind of listings there is somethin and a mention of mans hobbies, like they don't care what they are but they want the guy to be passionate or to care, except when the hobbie gets in the way
which I don't get is, there are some hobbies that are better hidden, I mean, not very well seen in the mainstream.
I just don't get what are the rules here.
>>28203769
Oh ok, I was just checking. The "not robin williams" guy here I would have done body hair removal all over but I am Aussie anyway so never mind. I've even been told I look 13 when I shave.
>tfw LITERALLY no femanons in Australia
>>28203707
Literally me babe
>>28203800
Fly me to Straya, ill marry your ass just for dual citizenship
>>28202900
>tfw your 11th cock is lined with tiny Tuvan throat-singers instead of tiny, sharp teeth
Fuck, so close. Guess I really will be alone forever.
>tfw no woman wants a tall, chubby, native american guy
>>28203707
>he doesn't like traps
bye whore
>>28203818
/r9k/ warned me about marriage
>>28203849
Dont worry, we will divorce after three years and theres such things as prenups
>>28203868
Will you make me call you mommy and do foot stuff
>>28203879
...uh. Im not against it? I actually have some breddy nice feet
>>28203810
hey be my bf please
>>28203906
post feet
originaru commentereto
>>28203906
What fantasy did you have in mind? Just regular vanilla sex but I am supposed to be a QT young boy?
>>28202847
fuuuuuuuck
i fit all this shit
too bad i live half way cross the world and have no hobbies or social skills to even initiate a conversation
>>28203377
>not part of the american master heritage
>thinks you can have this pussy without sacrificing cheese burgers to the great Dale Earnhardt in the sky
>>28203350
I'm not really into blood play, but step daddy chaddy never gagged me, so that must really mean you care ^-^
>>28203774
well, it may or may not surprise you to know that not all women are interested in or care about all the same things. personally, short of /mlp/ and other completely fucked up shit, I wouldn't really care what my hypothetical boyfriend is into. I think women like to share hobbies, or at least I do personally. I'd like to learn from him and see him get excited about something. it's bonus points for me if it's something I'm also into, and it's bonus points if it's something I'm not into that we could share or that I would like to learn.
because then it's just sharing.
>>28203698
I like downtempo electronica, avant-garde and experimental, chamber, ambient/dark ambient, triphop, jazz, blues, neofolk and folk revival, prog rock, post rock, classic rock, pagan metal and speed metal.
I'm not infinitely hard to get along with as far as music.
>>28203967
I like the sound of you but I don't really fit your criteria too much
Where are you from?
>>28203929
Ok, a/s/l?
>>28203967
>I'm not infinitely hard to get along with as far as music.
Well that's good, especially if it meant we could introduce each other to other artists, but ad I've noted already
>manlet
any fembots like cute girly boys here?
>>28203967
> see him get excited about something
I don't understand this female trait. A lot of girls have mentioned that they are into guys who themselves are really into something and it turns them on. Why is this? Why is seeing guys with passion for something a turn on for women?
Seems oddly specific.
>>28203967
>downtempo electronica, avant-garde and experimental, chamber, ambient/dark ambient, triphop, jazz, blues, neofolk and folk revival, prog rock, post rock, classic rock, pagan metal and speed metal.
I can dig it. Listen to all those.
>5'11"
I can not dig.
>>28204009
Women are snakes.
Like paracites.
If they latch onto someone, your happiness is theirs. Your motivation is their inspiration. They feed off your mood and behaviour and try to match, mimic and mold themselves to be more appealing to you.
>>28203481
TFW that's me except blue eyes and more than slight muscles.
>>28204009
>Why is seeing guys with passion for something a turn on for women?
It's not. They want a guy with passion for something that makes him money and/or raises his social status. No one cares about a guy who collects model trains in his basement unless he's the leader of his model train society or whatever the fuck.
It's mostly women who have absolutely nothing to offer (fat ugly nerd camwhores) who even mention this hobby/passion bullshit, because they need some hierarchy to latch onto and justify their choice, since no guy that's successful in mainstream "real life" hierarchy would want them.
>>28203967
but this is contradictory to me.
Here is the part IDK, for example I get why you don't want a flat person that only exists beside you.
But I also don't get why girls get so mad when en enjoy themseleves., Like If i wanna marathon my self some things up alone hikki style, or girls hating boys for being on the Xbox or girls hating guys going out to watch a baseball game with their bros.
That gets them so mad.
So what are the rules here?
>>28204006
>tfw the ryan gosling cereal guy died
Femanons: I am mudraced robot. Do I have any chance in hell?
>>28202656
I like Arab/Middle Eastern-looking guys with white personalities. Being Muslim is a dealbreaker though.
>>28204078
If you have light skin, blue green or hazel eyes and arent fat, youd be pretty damn okay in my book.
>>28204009
a guy that doesn't have any passions or hobbies?
1. what on earth does he do with his time?
2. does he not have love for anything?
3. will it be hard to get him to share in things I like? i.e. talking about music, tv, politics, books, games, whatever
also it makes you seem boring.
it's just not healthy or natural to have no hobbies.
>>28204006
how short are you?
we could talk about music anyway, if you have a skype.
>>28203993
midwest US.
>>28203951
oh you sound lovely
And I feel bad that I made a cute image of you in my head.
Too bad that perfect answer wasn't replied to me,
into gaging. One can only dream I guess
how pathetic is that I am jealous of wanting to have made the gaging with pads post?
Maybe this means I have had to much of life and internet for today.
>>28204093
Sikhs are probably the most ideal then, huh?
>>28203944
Perhaps in another life anon.
I hope you find your own socially awkward, same continental living, slut princess one day.
>>28204106
>midwest US.
>Another non aussie
I think it might be just worth it for me to move to USA or Canada or something. This country is normie central.
>>28202656
>at or above 5'7"
>as fit as me
>good hair
>good skin
>smells nice
>has unique interests and also shared interests
>religious
>likes animals
>good with kids
>makes as much or more than I do (80k/Yr)
>respectful but fun
>kind
>protective but not controlling- trusting
>intellegent
>open minded
>nice penis
>nice butt
>handsome
>patient
>funny
These are not requirements just preferences.
The more of these you have the more I'll like you
>>28204106
>how short are you?5'4"
This is why spoilers were invented kiddies
>>28203579
>>kinky af
What does that mean? Do you want the usual degenerate shit that mentally ill daddy issues whores want?
>>28204106
>>it's just not healthy or natural to have no hobbies.
true
m-my hobby is browsing r9k for 8 hours every day
may I have gf?
>>28204146
you took 'ideal boyfriend' to the next level kek
>>28204071
>So what are the rules here?
I don't care if you want to go do some things with your guy friends or play video games or have alone time, but you have to work in moderation. there's no reason to be dating someone if you prefer to spend all of your time alone. dating someone you live within driving distance of and only seeing them once or twice a week isn't acceptable.
you're supposed to be dating to find out if you could live together for the rest of your lives, you know? some alone time for both of you is good; but you should also incorporate them into your life. that's the entire point.
>nice
>sense of humor
>traditional values
>dominate
>compassionate
>can teach me things
>pasoniate about something
I used to describe him in here all the time but now it hurts too much
>>28204153
it would work if you find a gf whose hobby is also browsing /r9k/ for 8 hours a day but you will need to make time for relationship things too.
>>28204150I'm even worse ;)
>>28204149ouch
>>28204112
No, I don't like long hair on men at all. Also, aren't sikhs usually very Indian-looking? When I said Middle Eastern I meant like the light-skinned Northern ones. i.e. Lebanese, Jordanian, Turkish, Iraqi, Persian, etc. Pic related. If they were light-skinned and have short hair then sure.
>>28204223
>relationship things
once I get a gf I plan on making r9k jealous about it for 8 hours a day
that's good isnt it?
>>28204149
That's beyond manlet. That's kill yourself right now status.
>>28204181
ok I am starting to get it.
you actually make it sound good and fun.
so , what was your ideal bf again?
I guess spending time explaining basic things like this is a no no
.
>>28204223
>I'm even worse ;)
What does that mean? Do you masturbate with your own turd when someone replies to your irritatingly vague posts?
>>28204205
what if he is passionate about ponyes?
>>28204223
>I'm even worse ;)
I like it when girls step on bugs and have an evil smirk on their face
Is that too degenerate?
>>28204223
>ouch
I know
Why do girls like to be choke fucked? I mean I hae 0 problem doing this and It certainly seems to make them cum faster. Is it a self-esteem thing? Daddy issues?
>>28204240
>That's kill yourself right now status.
I may be short and browse /r9k/, but I'm not depressed enough about my height to off myself.
I'd rather just love the rest of my life alone doing what I love.
>>28204115
Time to try again.
Wish me luck.
It's a shame. I'm pretty attractive too.
Guess there's no cure for what's in your head.
Seems like I might fit maybe...two ideals.
Not bad. Good luck and all that, for whenever you find someone.
>>28204178
Gotta Dream big lol
>>28204109
And to think I was almost woo-ed.
>how pathetic is that I am jealous of wanting to have made the gaging with pads post
Well duh, you can't even shit post properly. I'd be pretty upset learning I was autistic loser too.
Wait a minute...
>>28204290
Because they're literally subhuman. Might as well stick your dick in a cow.
>>28204290
who care, i love they like it, i like doing it and forced to call you daddy.
probably a mixe of two, Helps they get closer to you
>>28204258
Please respond
Would this be a relationship killer for most women? Is it as weird to others as it is to me?
Sup bitches, Chad here.
Submit your gf applications now.
>>28204007
Do you only like dominant fembots?
>>28203967
Fuck I fit your criteria, but alas. I'm a fucking loser manlet.
>>28204295
>doing what I love
get the fuck >>>/out/ of here normie
>>28204357
I've exploded a slug by pouring salt on it
Ate ants
My friend ate a bee with the stinger still on it
>>28204368
Collecting vidya/comic books and enjoying editing film make me normie?
>>28204357
Eh, I once dated a guy with a "squirrel killing knife" and tole me he wished he could hear "those fat little groundhogs scream" while he mow them down with his truck. It's about finding someone equally as fucked as you.
>>28204378
Where are you from?
Another original comment btw
>>28204241
my post was >>28203579
I don't mind explaining things, I'm older than most people on this board and I've learned from my life so it only makes sense to pass on what I know.
>>28204248
every single time
gimme them (You)s bby
>>28204258
step on bugs with their bare feet?
because I hate bugs and I wouldn't step on one with my bare foot.
>>28204260
are you into femdom at all?
there are girls that would like a guy shorter than them. especially ones that are older, like milf-tier.
>>28204290
masochism
women are naturally prone to it the same as men are naturally prone to sadism
it's why no one actually has a problem with choking during sex, people just like it. guys like to choke the girl because it strokes their masculine ego to make her seem so weak and in his control and it strokes the feminine ego to be choked and made so weak and to feel owned.
biology bitch.
>>28204146
1. Check
2. Probably not
3. Check
4. Check
5. Depends on the weather
6. Check
7. I don't hate religion
8. I love animals
9. Good with kids, but don't want any
10. I'm 18, I don't even begin to make money
11. Respectful eh, fun I guess....
12. eh
13. eh
14. I mean i guess
15. I guess
16. Hell yes
17. Yes
18. eh....
19. nope
20. I'm goddamn hilarious
So yeah, we're completely incompatible.
>>28204400
>men are naturally prone to sadism
Just fuck off.
>>28204146
>just barely made it past the manlet cutoff
phew lad
>>28203848
this desu senpai
i ain't gay but just let a nigga live you know
These threads should be banned if I'm being completely honest. Fembot should also be filtered to 'stinkubus'.
>>28204400
>are you into femdom at all?
>there are girls that would like a guy shorter than them. especially ones that are older, like milf-tier.
I wouldn't mind it
>>28204363
im pretty much a true switch
>>28204400
>step on bugs with their bare feet?
Sometimes, but mostly high heels.
>>28204205
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
I FUCKING ALL OF THESE THINGS GIRLS ARE DESCRIBING BUT SUFFER FROM DEPRESSION AND SOCIAL ANXIETY THAT PREVENTS ME FROM ACTING THIS WAY
JUST FUCK MY LIFE UP SENPAI
WHY THIS THREAD EXIST RUINENING OF R9K AND NOW TRIPFAG IN EVERY THREAD!!!!!!!! FUCK YOU ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>28204458
that's not so bad. I mean at least for me, but I have a bunch of fucked up fetishes of my own, so I could understand where someone might like that.
if it weirds her out, then she just isn't the one for you.
>>28204446
where are you from? are you qt?
>>28204421
hey, I'm just saying, of all the men I've ever talked to about it, I've only met one who was against that kind of thing.
most men are totally cool with it just like most women are totally cool with it. choking is absolutely mainstream.
>>28204365
h-how tall
>>28204205
So you want a father to fuck?
>>28204205
I've tried teaching women things...it turns into a big chore when they lose interest.
I fit most else, depending on what you consider to be "passionate about something". Not sure if historical war item collecting is interesting to most.
>>28204503
>if it weirds her out, then she just isn't the one for you.
Thanks, that makes me feel better (no sarcasm)
>>28204205
So basically you have no idea what you want? That list is generic as fuck.
>>28204503
>where are you from?
Southern Illinois
>are you qt?
I have no clue, I don't seem to disgust women as they talk to me and close friends/family tell me I'm "good looking" but I don't think that counts.
>>28202764
>>28202847
>>28202891
>>28202865
>>28203073
>>28203236
>btw guys i'm a grilll
>pay attention to meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Fuck. Off.
Fuck off.
We seriously do not care. We don't care about your day, we don't care about your boyfriend, we don't care about your issues. One thing we certainly don't care about is your fucking opinions. Jesus Christ, why did you make this post? Did it benefit, inform, arouse concern in ANYONE? No. You posted this because you are a solipsistic whore who thinks she matters because guys like her kikebook photos. I can hear you just now, you're thinking "but i don't have fa-" SHUT THE FUCK UP. I don't care about your fucking tumblr either. It's a site where you post pictures of yourself for validation, hell it could be /r9k/ for all that matters - you are still an attention whore. The guys that have called you beautiful on omegle have convinced you that you have any kind of worth, guess what: you don't. You're valued for a vagina. That's it. Nothing else. Why you think owning something that 50% of the human population owns makes your opinions worthy of shit is fucking beyond me.
Words cannot describe the utter amount of hatred I have for you. I cannot stand your vapid personality, the way you look so clueless all the time. You are a literal robot who lives for nothing more than getting validation from random guys on the internet i.e. us, and you think we're going to tolerate you parading your fucking boring thoughts on our board? Think again, cunt. Girls like you are the most boring people anyone could ever meet, because you do nothing but talk about some guy you met on here or what was on tumblr or your hair or some song you supposedly like or just SOME OTHER SHIT WE DON'T CARE ABOUT. Fuck you. You have the audacity to expect us to care when you never provide any interesting discourse or state something interesting, you literally just consume and regurgitate SHIT. We whole heartedly despise you, and you should never forget that.
Phsyically:
>light eyes
>skelly or skinnyfat
>pale
>white or korean/japanese
>jew nose
Other:
>mental illness and not just depression meme, something actually interesting
>NEET preferred
>into conspiracies
>shut-in
>smokes/doesn't mind smoking
>likes night walks
>pretentious
>doesn't mind obsessive gfs
>no female friends
>no friends at all
>>28204405
Haha well you sound like you're doing well for only being 18. Plus a lot of the stuff is just personal preference- you're gonna make it anon :)
>>28204431
It's ok at 5'7" I'm barely below the giantess cutoff
>>28204400 so By watching this >>28203579
-how tall are you?
-I guess I am a little builtfat
-I have a beard and glasses. (trying to loose the beard for dream of becoming a clean cut)
you would probably find my beard ugly anyway
-I have tons of hobbies, Hide them all, but be willing and happy to share, not embarassing stuff, just jelaous of people trying to steel the hype or not wanting to find Amy self into the "hey anon i heard you are into this" and trying to talk to their ignorant heads about it.
-The music one is easy, just love hearing and playing music, (autistic reluctant to tell other people what music i listen or play and just say anything- same escenario as hobbies) but willing and happy to share
Don't eat junk food, maybe just coockies, I try to cook simple things, not hard I don't eat too often
would like to travel (who doesn't)
yes
yes
yes
However that wouldn't matter, cause I don't get basic shit even tho I am 26, and I am sure I am not on your driving area.
I just really wanted to fit into one of this ideal partner things for just once, at least.
you seem fun and polite. thanks for explaining things
>>28204571
Haha thank you, my personality saves me from being a total loss.
>>28204503
What happened to you that you can't enjoy normal sex? Some trauma or just insanity?
>>28204551
And you wonder why no one wants to touch your dick...
OH MY GOD ONE THREAD FILLED WITH TAMPONS AND GROCERIES NOT MY 4CHAN REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Get over yourself faggot. Every single fucking post on this site (including your nice little rant) is made for attention. It's social norm, not a gendered one. Women are just easier to please. Just justify my sexual appeal and I'm all your. Meanwhile you want equally autistic shits to stroke your dick for "being above the grasp of the rosties" and not giving in to the "whores".
Just admit you're sad and bitter because not even mommy will succumb to the advances of her precious baby boy.
dead and far away from me
>>28203579
Funny how you never mentioned the choking and other fetish shit in your previous boyfriend application where you try to make yourself into a woe is me foreveralone fembot.
http://desustorage.org/r9k/thread/23537182/
Oh look you're a druggie too.
http://desustorage.org/r9k/thread/15425336/#15439924
>>28204670
>implying I want a filthy stinkubus whore to touch my dick
kek, no thanks. pic very related.
>>28204541
>tfw Illinois here
s-skype pls
>>28204592
no problem, I guess
you shouldn't be embarrassed about sharing your hobbies, because then what if there's a qt out there who never had anyone tell her that, and she hides them too?
you guys could walk right past each other and never know.
>just jelaous of people trying to steel the hype or not wanting to find Amy self into the "hey anon i heard you are into this" and trying to talk to their ignorant heads about it.
literally what
>>28204603
did I say that I couldn't enjoy normal sex?
I just think it would be boring to only have one type of sex forever. fetish is fun.
LARGE BLACK DICK THAT i CAN BARELY FIT IN MY MOUTH PLEASE.
>>28204705
who are you and why do you care?
how did you even find a post I made in 2014?
this is some creep shit
also to answer your question, of course the shit I write out isn't the ONLY stuff about me. just a menagerie of things that were prompted information.
>guys I found the autist
>>28204709
>s-skype plsI have one, but I'm not sure. I barely use it and having someone on here seeing my real name scares me.
Scratch that, anyone on the internet.
a pretty, small and gentle dark haired boy who will break my heart
Look how fucking bullshit this is, when it's a guy thread and we post out qt's and people we want we get no fucking reply and the thread is only filled with men. Yet when females make a thread and post they get 10 replies each and everyone is a perfect match.
Ok.
>>28204775
>this is some creep shit
What, your creepy sexual fetishes or your creepy drug use or your creepy whoring on /r9k/?
Did you not know about the archive before today or what?
>>28204709
What I meant was.
(sorry english not my first language and autocorrect goes weird from time to time)
I would get jealous of the way other people see and treat this things, maybe is a childish Idea.
But I wouldn't like to find my self in a situation where a person hears and is semi into this stuff and tries to make small talk about it " Hey anon I heard you are into westerns" and then cringe about how light is their knowledge on the matter
I would love to share but not with everyone, not that i have mucho people to share with in the first place.
>>28204825
what do you expect from an imageboard with such a high male to female ratio? grow up
>>28204825
what is your ideal qt3.14159 anon?
>>28204825
there are more men on this board than women.
I haven't gotten a "perfect match" or even a close match yet.
Check.
>>28204825
>>28204842
Also pretty curious.
>>28204842
>>28204849
Yeah, well don't pretend and claim you are lonely. Looking at this thread is complete fucking bullshit just how easy girls can get people. Complete fucking bullshit, while i haven't got one single reply to my fucking qt chart or thread like this when i post my supposed match.
Fuck this thread i'm out.
>>28204828
I know the archive exists, just didn't realize someone was out there tracking every post I've made for two years or more, that doesn't strike you as kind of creepy?
I'm not afraid of my fetishes or affinity for marijuana.
>>28204832
why would it bother you that people are trying to reach out to you about common interests?
you shouldn't find it "cringe" worthy, I would just be happy someone cared enough to know what I was into and wanted to talk about it.
>>28203379
am sayin senpai
>>28204893
>I know the archive exists, just didn't realize someone was out there tracking every post I've made for two years or more
What did you think the archive was doing then?
How many poor /r9k/ saps did you ruin so far? Not enough?
>>28203329
>We're taking about ideals here
>>28203379
>why didn't you text me for three days
>i was really depressed and barely got out of bed the whole time sorry I wasn't really feeling socializing
>yeah right go back to fucking your chad you vapid slut
Girls don't have real problems, their all lying sluts don'tyaknow.
>>28204878
wehelp thanks for pisses me off honestly how cna they even claim to be lonely?
>>28204893
Maybe you are right.
But I have had experiences where people tried to reach me just to validate themselves on the matter.
Most of the time I just don't simply care about this people opinions, mostly because they speak out the mainstream voice of what they heard of read on the matter instead of their opinions, So not only do I just re heard things, but i also don't learn anything from the akward experience.
However like how you put it, sharing music and interests, Trying to actually learn and share with some one else is something that i might wanna try, sounds fun.
But then again maybe people just wouldn't find me interesting enough,
>>28204825
>REEEEE WHY IS LIFE IS NOT FAAAAAAIIIIRR
>>28203201
Just her wet holes, like every other "fembot" in here.
>>28202656
>average height (5'8-5'11)
>skinny
>wavy longish hair
>cute face
>dorky/nerdy
>shares similar interests with me
>will let me do butt stuff with him and gently dominate him in bedtfw found the perfect guy but he's a thousand miles away
>>28205036
I'm everything you listed except the wavy hair, am bald
>>28205036
It's always this, I'm looking at 1700~ KM right now.
>>28205036
hi this is 100% me, where you at
>>28204994
it depends on what they're into.
if someone likes sci-fi and electronic music and you like westerns and classic rock, you'd probably find each other boring. you get it? so it's a matter of finding someone who is like you.
>>28204926
did someone like me make you mad one time?
did I personally make you mad one time?
>>28204801
;_; tfw no dream boy to trample all over my love for him
>>28202656
>/jp/
>STEM
>sweet
>probably a little bit autistic
>/gfd/
>>28205058
:( sorry anon, I like playing with guys' hair. running my fingers through their hair while being the big spoon hnng
>>28205060
ikr, life is suffering. I'd move if I could, but that'll just get me deported
>>28205068
but you don't even know what my interests are!
>>28205117
well then tell me your interests!
last time i believe fembots can be lonely
last time
>>28204064
I'm not that anon but pls be my bf.
I'm gay.
>>28205132
we A RE im lonely right now someone please contact me
>>28205036
is it ok if im not white
>>28205130
mostly /g/ and /k/ stuff
>>28205080
BUT I DO!
I do find interesting all those kind of this, I love sci-fi i love jazz, when I find a person that is fond with something IDK anything about or slightly know, i play stupid and ask them to hear everything, I actually like learning.
I'm not a stuck up, I am always trying to learn and hear new things on my own
However
Do you find yourself interesting?
I guess I don't find my self interesting to desu, but maybe because I know my self.
>>28205132
Why? Like I don't get what you're implying with this?
>>28204709
>>28204779
Oh fuck it I'll bite
Email?
Any australian girls here?
Be my qt please
>5FT11
>Lift weights
>White
>Many other hobbies and interests
>>28205174
i cant say im totally into that stuff, particularly guns, but its honestly something im really interested in but have just never been exposed to
unrelated butdo you like biting?
>>28205220
how much is this in cm?
>>28205196
[email protected]
>>28205183
I don't know if I find myself interesting
but I'm sure that other people might find me interesting, however few people that may be
just because of the sheer number of individual people on the planet, there's no reason to think you are ever actually alone in anything.
>>28205241
>how much is this in cm?
180
>>28205220
I lift weights but I am a skinny faggot lol this is honestly a ridiculous thing to put as your ideal mate
>>28205230
who's biting who?
>>28205251
O ok, Im a guy I just wanted to know,
I googled my height and I m 6.0ft and something more
>>28205248
>[email protected]
I should've known it was all fake this whole time.
Oh well, back to browsing /r9k/ like usual.
>>28205264
What are you talking about? i listed the things about myself. What is the point of your reply?
all these cucks in my motherfuckin threads
>someone living in colorado who isn't mexican
>or half mexican
>"ayyyye bby where ya get dem leeeeegs"
>tfw no skinny, white, nerdy, awkward, stoner bf :(
>>28205270
preferably both
>>28205284
dude what?
it's a temporary email, I figured you were going to give me your skype
are you, or not?
does any girl want a sad, tall, white, ottermode, drug enthusiast, socially broken boyfriend that acts like i don't give a shit when i do.
nah didn't think so.
>>28205080
>>did someone like me make you mad one time?
>did I personally make you mad one time?
No, why? Do you make people mad often?
>>28205309
Oh I'm dumb
Sorry, I'm new to this whole sorta thing
>>28205321
Pretty sure I literally just described this.
>tfw no daddy bf to sell me weed for cummies and shit edibles into my mouth ;_;
>>28205274
>tfw thought you were an aussie girl
going to do pull-ups and gorilla crunches until failure because of disappoint.
>>28205248
Yes you are right in that part.
Maybe my thing is that I don't know basic stuff
or maybe I'm just ugly.
I enjoyed talking to you and you actually cared to answer all my retarded questions, I don't know how to keep the conversation although I actually wanted to talk to you, just do not know how to keep it.
At first I wanted to talk with anyone, I don't get much conversation and forcing it becomes cringy.
I could keep asking stupid question but maybe it would just be forcing the natural conversation flow and get cringe really fast.
Thank you for the good read. It was nice.
-I know he color doesn't match-
>>28205036
That's me. What's good qt?
>>28205306
I can get behind that
original comment you dumb bot
>>28205376
I'm Sorry mate
It was a legitimate doubt.
>>28205350
didn't pay much attention to the thread
fuck
can't do anything about it; anything
i can't even get outside to meet people without getting high or drunk.
>tfw just want a skinny druggie bf
PLEAAAAAAAAASEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
