New thread.
Brit School Memories and street memories!
I basically just hid in a bush during most of playtime and lunch, I never even ate lunch ever or used the toilet
Watching Zzzap! after school whilst the babysitter's son was raping me.
Anyone remember when their school put up the massive 10ft high green fences?
Couldn't go out onto the field any more during break, had to be let out on nice days.
Absolute bastards.
http://youtu.be/k52RjUPo8J8
Don't mind me, beat British kids show coming through
>>27318413
I think that was due to perverts. Ours went up when there was stories of some dude in a car.
>>27318431
>tfw when you stay up late one night and watch naked jungle run
>see keith cheggers balls
Fucking didn't want to remember that.
>staying up late to watch Eurotrash
Someone always cutting a hole into the fence at the end of the field so people could nip out to the chip shop without a home-lunch pass.
>>27318345
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a0pXnprQvSA
>But where does it goh?
>>27318466
Naked jungle run? Is this a thing or are you fucking with me?
That reminds me though
>those sleepovers where you and your friends would watch sexcetra / babe station and just talk about how hot they were
>>27318466
>jerking off to shitty porn freeviews at 9pm if hi were lucky and your parents were out
>women's clothing catalogues, all those bare feet gave me a foot fetish
>rotten old porno mag you found in a puddle
>finally get internet and have a guilty fap to scat porn that you found by simply typing poo
What a life
>>27318466
Late night TV was the best. I used to watch it in bed. Mostly Channel Four
>Derren Brown
>That game show Jimmy Carr used to host where they'd have to do dumb shit
>Graham Norton when it was on Channel Four and all crude humour
>Will and Grace repeats
>Stuff like Room Raiders and Switched and dating stuff
>Jackass
>Shows with actual tits in them that I'd wank off to because there was only one family computer
Meanwhile BBC just had this shit.
Anyone ever been unable to sleep and rather than go on the computer just watched late night TV all night?
>>27318553
I wish I was lad. Google it. I don't have the heart to link it here.
>>27318570
>Sneaking down to watch Babestation
>Wank off to just them in underwear dirty talking
>Lasts like two minutes tops.
Ahh, the old wanking days. Could easily do it to a lingerie catalogue.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wQhWXh5-EZw
Before the cynicism and hate of the 21st century swamped our souls.
>>27318597
Holy shit it's real, I'm off to have the most confusing wank of my life
>>27318573
Oh and I forgot Banzai, Mister Hand shakes man.
PLACE YOUR BETS NOW.
Just who WAS putting all those dirty old porno mags in the woods all over the UK?
Used to find them in the bushes at school, in the woods behind my flats (Hampshire), in the trees near my Nan's house across town, and even found them in a gulley behind my Gran's house in fucking Scotland!
i mean what was the point? Were they throwing it away? Why not just use the bin? They were certainly never around to witness us children finding the damned things.
>Coming home from Primary School to watch CITV
Wanking felt so fucking amazing as a teenager and I've never had an orgasm as satisfying as those in my first year of masturbation.
>>27318665
They probably were.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xrVOpG6FdCs
>tfw Gareth Jones married Violet Berlin
What an absolute jammy cunt. I had such a crush
>that lisp
>when she'd wear those tops with the horizontal strips
>you'd see a little cleavage
> The Smell of the art classroom
>>27318665
They could be, there was a car park sort of area at the top of my road where all the local kids would play and some guy kept leaving naked pictures on the floor there because he got off to the idea of us finding them
>>27318698
That first one, though. I'll never have a full body seizure like that again.
>>27318403
I got fucking angry whenever they teased you, making you think it was going to Smart Arty then zooming away to some other shit
>>27318573
I've always been a nightowl as long as I can remember and late night tv is some of my best memories.
>Baywatch repeats
>Airwolf
>Freescreen (loved this show and it kills me that I'll never see it again
>Educational teen stuff on BBC
>Some show aimed at teens on C4 that was about some kids camp. Was pretty good.
Now it's all just games shows and boring shit like that. Late night TV will never be the same.
>>27318665
It was actually a thing, some perv here would lay out porn mags for younger people to find.
>>27318698
>be like 13
>watched porn a few times just to see what it's like
>keep having wet dreams
>decide only way to stop it is to jerk off
>can't find the courage to do it
>get a semi in the shower
>decide to just go for it
>unbelievable pain
>try it again a couple of weeks and a dozen wet dreams later to porn
>holy shit what the fuck have i been missing out on
>>27318767
Yeah now it's all call in shows. The stuff you mentioned reminded me of whenever I was off school and you got to watch the weekday morning TV and it was all still educational stuff. I learned more from those shows than at school to be honest. El Nombre! It was good thinking from the BBC to put stuff like that on.
Same with on cartoon network, they aired the obscure shows at like weekdays like Fatdog Mendoza. Back when Cartoon Network ended at like 9pm and came back at 7am.
>>27318767
Do you remember the TV show name?
I remember The Tribe on Channel 5, that was a cool teen thing.
Anyone remember that episode of round the twist where the lad pisses so high it goes out the window
How the fuck were they allowed to get away with this shit back then.
>>27318403
It never went on the eye
Any anons wanna share their bullying stories im an antibullying ambassador in my school -16 pretty boring but i got a day off for a training day
gonna share mine
>move to new school teacher makes kid be my friend super nice teachers pet type kid super nice to me lets call him M.
>M has a friend lets call him A he hates my guts because M is his friend not mine and gets pissy whenever i talk to him make friends with the other new kid who is polish super chill would play pokemon with him all the time
>A is fat and has a voice that sounds like a stereotypical gay voice decides to go to teacher saying im staring at him every break time just glares at me and harass me and then plays the victim despite me never doing shit teacher sees through this and tells me to tell him when A does this but A tells his mother who goes into the school and just causes more shit and the rest of the year is ruined because i keep getting punished despite doing nothing
>the next year A moves away to australia finally happy best year ever super chill teacher who is great make some new friends everything goes great until about half way through the year.
>A comes back forget his name he says hi to me I just say hi and walk away in front of the class teacher thinks im being rude to him get told his name say hi to him
>A fucking week later he starts shit again by doing the same victim shit based teacher from last year retired cant stick up for me and im assumed a dick friends stick up for me and tell alex to fuck off and he does
>next year A,s dad dies go to his funeral with class he hates that im there when he comes back its all be nice to A he is going through a very tough time dont even talk to him even tell him im sorry for what happened he just doesnt respond and makes up more shit would join in on chasing games with M and my friends who dislike him and just go for me and would cheat and hit me get told to fuck off by a friend of mine he makes more shit up and me and friend get in trouble. kek
>>27318403
I swear it was always t he same three fuckers every time, no other ones.
>>27318841
i used to cover my dick in shampoo and pretend it was cum and moan quietly to myself
found out a few years later my sister slept in the room next to the bathroom she was 4 and is still confused about what happened now
>be like year 5
>be at pantomime
>all is going well
>need to go to toilet, shout at Mrs Hall who is sat quite distance away
>she nods and let's me go
>go for a piss, come back sit down
>a little while later need the toilet again
>ask get permission to leave again
>she gestures no
>panic, really need to piss
>sit there for the next 5 minutes trying to ignore it
>really need to go NOW
>beg Mrs Hall to please let me go to the toilet
>again she shakes her head and tells me to settle down
>not of the age yet to think rationally and just ignore her and piss anyway
>remain obedient and seated, my bladder pressuring into my pants belt line
>a few minutes before the end of the pantomime when they are throwing shit into the crowd I piss myself badly
>walk back to the school bus as though nothing happened
>sat in my own piss on the bus
>when we get back to school the seat was very damp and warm
>surely the bus must have smelled like piss
>go home, no one found out, no one mentioned anything ever
>don't know how no one could notice
Fuck you Mrs Hall you piece of shit.
tfw junior infant too autist so always put my hand up to use the toilet when people would just go and teacher wouldnt give a shit had my hand sprung up while teacher just read a fucking magazine
shit myself go through whole day nobody fucking realizes even played chasing with a hunk of shit in my underwear
Doing an all-nighter at a sleepover with ya mates because it was awesome. Everyone spending the entire next day trying to pretend they aren't desperate to sleep.
> That one blocked toilet in the boys toilets that people would just keep filling up with more and more shit and daring people to go in and flush.
Who here /MonaTheVampire/?
GOAT television show.
Remember coming home from school to watch a few episodes on CBBC
>>27319178
i never actually watched a full episode of bernard's watch but even to this day i imagine what i could do with that power
What was your Saturday Morning, Before School and After School watch?
I was mostly a BBCfag.
Weekday mornings was BBC, Round the Twist and Raven and Get Your Own Back, then later on I moved to ITV where I watched Cardcaptors and My Parents Are Aliens
After school was for sure BBC, CITV was shit. Mona the Vampire, Tracy Beaker, Jeopardy, Grange Hill and Biker Grove.
Saturday Morning I went with SMTV until Ant and Dec and Cat Left. Then I went for Smile and Dick and Dom.
>>27319176
that one piece of shit that floats and has a nickname and the kid who actually flushes it gets jumped
>>27319204
Those types of shows annoyed me because the show was always about how they didn't need the power. The episode would always end with them having to sort the shit caused by their power or sort stuff without using their power.
Who else here /TracyBeaker/?
I have probably watched every single episode of Tracy Beaker
What a show
>>27319178
Show us your fangs... YAH MONA!
090 11 10 50 10
Wonky Donkey
Brum
Budgie the Little Helicopter
Postman Pat
Fireman Sam
Stretch Armstrong
Fapping to Cat Deely
Waking up early on a Saturday just to fucking watch Pokemon
>>27319137
When their parent would let you drink and you'd get pissed off two cans.
>>27319245
SHE'S A NICE NORMAL GIRL
IN AN ORDINARY WORLD
SHOW US YOUR FANGS
YAY MONA
GRAB YOUR CAT
GRAB YOUR CAPE
BOOGEYMAN
THERE'S NO ESCAPE
THE QUEEN'S NOSE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H-JXfIV2Zpo
>when they get it wrong and dec goes absolutely balistic at the camera
SMTV was the all round best Saturday TV
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=urPG8kB_gVw
Big Breakfast was classic before school watch though.
>>27319267
BRUM
holy shit that little yellow shitty car getting into all sorts of hijinks
>>27318345
>Red Nose Day 2001
>Be in Year 4
>Go to the toilet wearing Red Nose for some reason
>Falls off into toilet
>Panic and try to grab it while leaning on the toilet handle
>Accidentally flush it
>Blocks toilet and overflows
>Flood entire classroom (and outside area)
>All got to go home early and no one ever found who did it
>>27319099
>Can I go to the toilet
>You should have went during break
>I didn't need it during break
>Are you desperate to go?
>Well, yeah.. that's why I'm asking to go.
>'EVERYONE GO TO THE EAST END TOILETS, QUICK, PHILS DONE THE LARGEST SHIT IVE EVER SEEN'
Followed by a mass wave of people running to see said monstrosity
>>27319207
>Raven
"You have lost a ring, Majeed."
>>27319298
CHALLENGE ANT
WHEN THAT FUCKING KID WENT FOR GAMBLE AND HE BEAT ANT
AND THEY FUCKIN WON LIKE 100 GAMES.
>>27319298
I really miss The Big Breakfast and Brookside too.
>>27319344
>Yeu must loose.. a laif.
>lighting strike
I actually watched the first ever Way of the Warrior winner, on TV. I flipped shit and my parents were confused, nobody had ever beaten it until that point.
Anyone else here /TheCrampTwins/?
GOAT show.
Used to watch it on CBBC every morning
>>27319298
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l08XV0nuhfE
"Me and Cat, alone in the flat..."
>Was on either GMTV or The Big Breakfast one morning
>Guy in a cul-de-sac knocking on peoples doors and if the parents were there they won a large amount of money or something
>Guy knocks door
>Girl about 11 or 12yo answers and is pretty clueless on the situation
>"umm I'll go get my mum"
>Guy is going "quickly quickly"
>Guy gives up and moves on to another house
I've been thinking about this memory recently and I can only imagine that the girl was somewhat disowned by her parents for costing them that money.
>>27319390
Remember Navar?
Guy was fucking terrifying for a children's show.
Whenever someone "died" and Navar fucking obliterated them, I genuinely thought they had died
>>27319370
The Big Breakfast!
That year where no ones paren'ts could stop their kids from singing "Get your, get your nobbly nuts out!"
>>27319469
Supposedly Raven was really slow on set. Like because they had to CG stuff like deaths there'd be a lot of pausing during the games and rearranging and bringing people off set and having to direct them, so it got confusing at times.
>>27319344
'You have completed the challenge, and therefore earned yourself a feathah'
>>27319207
Weekday mornings was either Big Bad Beetleborgs.. or Teletubbies
Afternoons was CITV, Art Attack
Weekends were Transformers, Power Rangers etc
>>27319498
>Are you ready? Then let the challenge.....begin."
It would definitely be shit to be a contestant on Raven with all the CGI yeah. The pauses would have done my nut in.
I always wondered how the contestants applied to be on shows like that though
When everyone in school had a crush on someone who looked like this but you didn't.
Those science videos we all watched at school that were old as shit that was parodied more recently in Look Around You.
>>27319596
You know the saddest fucking thing in the world?
All the women still fucking look like that.
>>27319584
If you remember the final challenge with Nevar to get yourself to the finals was to run to the portal as he throws 'lightning bolts' and those robed guys walked around the battle field.
If you got hit you were insta eliminated, if all were hit they'd all go back to the start until someone go through the portal.
So someone was pelted by a ball, everyone would have to stop and pause, they'd be guided off, balls are cleared, have to do it again, if all are hit, they balls are cleared, robed guys back in position, everyone back at the start. It was only a 30 second challenge since it was essentially a race but must have took five minutes with all the pausing and unpausing.
>>27318403
Fuck, you've just unravelled a long forgotten frustration. Were they not aware of how much kids hated this?
>>27319331
Trying to imagine this post from the perspective of a non-Brit is quite hilarious.
Since someone was talking about pranks and shit that happened in PE changing rooms, here's my story. I've told it before but it was in a bullying thread.
>In top classes in most subjects, so there's not a lot of bad behaviour in those classes
>PE is divided into three groups for the whole year
>Top group is all the sporty athletic guys and the popular chads
>Middle is everyone else
>Bottom are the useless ones.
>Guess which I was in
>Bottom group was a mix of people not good at PE, lazy layabouts and bad kids
>So essentially you had a bunch of bullies and a bunch of people ripe for bullying, all in one group
>Rather than use the big changing room we use individual ones for each group
>Teacher has to leave when getting changed because people in their underwear
>Dumb idea because it left us alone with all these people
>People's underwear getting pulled down, belt whippings etc
>All that was done to me for a while was verbal abuse
>One kid was essentially the leader, he'd hurl verbal abuse to me but not physical
>One day he went around to each person saying "I like you." "I like you" then to whoever he didn't like he'd say "I don't like you" and slap them twice.
>He did that to me
>Get slapped
>Stand up
>Scream shit in his face I can't remember
>He looks like "What the fuck" because nobody's did that before
>Run out and tell the teacher on him
>Next PE lesson
>Know they'll be out for revenge
>They strip me and two others down
>Throw us outside the changing rooms and close the door
>Nobody around but we can hear people around us, girls as well
>We all freak out and bang on the door
>They make fun of one of us due to the fact he has no pubes yet
>They make fun of the moles on my butt
>They let us in
>I just silently get changed
>They still make fun
>I freak out
>I rush the leader guy
>Start beating the shit out of him
>His cronies pile on me
>They beat the shit out of me
>Nobody helps
>Teacher comes back
>Catches all this
>PE cancelled for us
>>27320260
>Me and Leader guy banned from PE for two weeks
>Had to do work instead
>Didn't mind
>By the time I get back the leader guy had been kicked out of school for something unrelated, smoking and stuff
>Heard they've been throwing people in the showers with their clothes on
>One PE lesson they turn the lights off
>Start beating me up
>I get knocked back
>Back of neck hits clothes peg
>Get winded
>Can't breathe
>Collapse
>They turn light on
>They freak out and tell teacher
>He comes back and sorts me out
>One guy gets suspended
>Individual changing rooms no longer allowed
>Everyone changes in the same room
>The bad kids don't do stuff anymore because they were essentially taking advantage of the powerless, now the more powerful were around
>No more shenanigans due to chads and stuff
>Still some homoerotic shenanigans would happen over the years
>I got enjoyment when one of the bad kids was once ran down for having a scrawny body.
>Was never belt whipped or anything
