Robots please help idk what to do
>masturbating after smoking some weed
>weed makes me kinky
>see toothbrush, see lotion, see asshole
>sounds fun
>start out slow but gradually speed up, get going pretty fast
>feel a sharp pinch, but ignore it
>give up because it wasnt working
>finish normally. then go take a shit
>red everywhere
>fuck
>mfw weed did this to me
How the fuck do i hide this from my mom?
also /mistake/ thread
Top kek op, top kek
Blocks
which way did you fuck yourself with it? jesus
also I have a mistake that also involve's partaking in the doobie
>be me
>be high
>thirsty as fuck and my friend dares me to chug a 2L bottle of water
>do it
>almost fucking puke everywhere but manage to keep it down
>fast forward 40 minutes
>still really high and have to take the biggest fucking piss
>we were smoking outside because his girlfriend doesn't let him smoke weed
>It was fucking winter too
>my hands were fucking freezing
>like sub zero temperatures
>when i unzip my pants and whip out my cock I almost die
>get the bright idea of pissing on my hands to warm them up
>feelsgoodman.mp4
>after I finish I realize what I have just done
>I realize I wasn't even facing the toilet
>mfw my friend kicks me out of his house for peeing on his floor
>mfw I haven't seen him in two years
>>24823344
Dude im a medic you may have torn a hole in your colon you need to go to the hospital.
You could die.
Shit may be flowing into your stomach
>>24823344
>>24823620
you dun goofed op
>>24823718
shit wrong reply i meant to do >>24823688
>>24823688
is there any way to check without going to the hospital? My mom is a hardcore conservative im not about to tell her I was fucking a toothbrush
>>24823790
seriously which end did you use?
>>24823620
How is it freezing inside the house
>>24823816
I just came back from outside and my hands were freezing
>>24823816
his hands were freezing
>>24823790
Yes you need to get a flash light. Go to the bathroom drop your pants. shut off all the lights. No turn on said flash light and stick the lens up your rectum. No open your mouth if the light is coming out of your mouth it should reflect in the mirror. If you dont see the light it means there is a hole in your colon.
Also not a medic just play one in battlefield.
>>24823811
the side without the bristles
>>24823870
thanks. will try
>>24823872
you're fucked familia
>>24823910
but i dont have any shit in me right now so i can wait for a little before getting checked out right
>>24823995
are you still bleeding?
>>24824040
a pink in the stink came out just a little red. so it hasn't completely stopped
>>24824040
actually now it stopped
>>24824113
I would go to a clinic or something still
>>24823344
Weed literally turned you gay, the 1950's propaganda was all true.
>>24824130
what might it be if it isnt a torn colon? i felt around a bit and i cant feel any rips so
>>24824167
Where you using red toothpaste?
>>24824167
I'm not a medifag so I don't know
>>24824259
that's a thing?
>>24824167
it's a torn colon. What else would be emanating blood in your asshole? The colon is the only thing up there besides your prostate.
it's not biggie if you can't feel the tear . since the bleeding has stopped, you don't have to worry. Probably just let it heal by itself, but if it gets worse see a doctor.
>>24824163
damn, I'm probably gonna start killing small animals next
>>24824352
good. maybe ill be able to keep my last shred of dignity in front of my mother now
>>24824474
yeah dude. I'm pretty sure i've done that before ( bled from my anus due to inserting things).
It sounds very minor. Your body will recover quickly. Don't tell your mom!!
