I was going to start an advice thread, but I'm feeling a bit too down to try to help others, so let's just have a talk. What's on your minds, robots, what are you thinking right now? How's stuff going for you?
I hate my job. Spend 8 hours a day sitting at the computer moving/renaming files and looking at reports. Was supposed to get some 'real world' accounting experience but it seems like they are using me for cheap labor and making me do things that the salaried people don't want to.
When this shit is over and I go back to college I have a public speaking class that's required for my degree. Don't see myself doing well and I'll most likely be on edge and anxious for the entirety of the course.
I'm hoping that I don't lose interest in my degree as I get deeper into it, lots of money and time wasted with no backup plan.
I've been sad for a long while. It's getting harder and harder to bear.
Never been to a psychologist, I'll probably try it. Or maybe a psychiatrist so I can get some pills to numb the everlasting suicidal urge.
>>30019525
Well what do you want to do with your life, anon? Like, if office life isn't for you, what would you like to do?
>>30019525
What kind of degree m8?
>>30019394
I am pissed at one girl cause she is being cold out of blue, normal stuff, I am getting used to it, I won't stop trying. Also, what's up OP?
>>30019580
Good idea anon. I started taking antidepressants and they're a fucking miracle. It's a lot harder to cum on them and I can't focus as well (I had to drop out of my university Dota 2 team, for that reason), but it's a very small price to pay for not feeling like you want to jump off a building.
>>30019588
Well I don't mind working in an office if there's meaningful work. I'd like to get into software development (apps/games) but it's not realistic to expect success and would be better as a hobby.
>>30019630
Honestly it's the most normie of problems. My gf of two months has gone off to Spain with her parents, and it's the first time we've spent a significant amount of time without contacting each other. What's more, she's moving to Oxford in August and I'm worried about having a long-distance relationship and stuff. You know, normie stuff.
What's up with this girl, anon? How close were you to her?
>>30019394
I'm having constant homicidal thoughts. It's a good thing I'm too lazy to leave my house.
>>30019630
>What kind of degree m8?
Accounting
>>30019642
I'm depressed but not suicidal yet, do you think it'd me worth it to try to get antidepressants or therapy?
I'm pretty lonelyorangutanand still no bf. I feel like someone's been leading me on recently, but it's not going anywhere.
On the other hand, I've been redrafting my sci-fi novel with plenty more violence and character development, which is nice, I guess.
>>30019656
It depends on your definition of meaningful, but if you've ever seen the movie Office Space, that's a pretty accurate representation of what office life is. None of it is meaningful, it's all just monotonous shit, just different day. I actually enjoy it, cause I find it therapeutic or something, but it's not for everyone. As for game design, I'm not 100% certain for to get into that industry, sorry):
>>30019642
I actually live in a building. A fourteenth floor. Sometimes I look down the window and cry.
It's not even that feeling what I'm trying to get rid of. I just want to not feel like shit for once. I struggle at controlling my emotions which makes me do stupid shit and get more depressed in return. I wonder how it feels to not be sad all the time. Anything would be a small price to pay when you've felt like this for as long as you can remember and nothing seems to fix it.
>>30019735
Go see a doctor, they'll help you deal with it.
>>30019736
Yes, most definitely. Depression is a serious illness and seeing a doctor will definitely help you deal with it.
>>30019759
Good stuff about your novel. I'm sorry about the guy thing. This is going to sound so stupidly corny, but there are plenty more fish in the sea - you'll find someone soon enough.
>>30019797
I know exactly what you mean, anon. For several years whenever I was on a high balcony I kept telling myself that I can jump off right now and just end it all. I'm telling you, Sertraline made me amazing - it's like everything is hazy and you feel a bit apathetic about stuff, but in a confident way, not a depressed way.
>>30019394
I decided it was a good idea to play football today.
Bonked my head with the ball a little too hard one time too much and now have terrible migraine, got my feet rubbed into dust, already happy to remove those bubbles, fucked my knee and got all dirty.
I have the slight feeling of getting too old for this shit and the desire to actually do some sport frequently because of this.
>tfw wanna start boxing, but afraid of the possible humiliation
>>30019717
We are in the same group at university. Shy is shy, doesn't talk much, she wears her hair in braid, love to watch movies and to sit at home all the time, she hats to come at classes. At the end of semester i took her for a walk to park, we got close(I used to be autistic beta faggot last summer, thanks to my (only)friend it's getting better). I took her to cinema last week(The Conjuring 2). I wanted to kiss her for goodbye before she got into the bus but I wasn't brave enough to do it. With every week we are getting more and more apart and i don't know what to do...
>>30019892
>Humiliation
Even the slowest fattest runner is lapping everyone lying on their couches. There won't be any humiliation. Sure, you won't be the next Muhammed Ali, but it doesn't matter if you win, lose or lose hard, the effort is all that matters. Go for it, man. You're not getting any younger, so now's the perfect time to do it. Good luck(:
>>30019892
Go into it anyways, anon. Alot of that humiliation is just you being too aware of how much of a beginner you'll be. That fades away by the second or third week of it.
Sucks that you bonked your head man, hope your migraine cools off.
I've been back home for a couple of weeks now after finishing my first year at university, and I feel dread that nothing's changed. I actually transcended to normie-dom during the first few months there; went out clubbing a lot, went to societies, had lots of different friendship groups, had a band. Earlier this year, stress and mild depression hit me hard and I because recluse, losing all that. So now in retrospect, I'm in the same state as I was a year ago - a shut in with no drive and no social life,
I work a few days a week in a retail job and I hate having to deal with the general public. I've hit a wall with recording music for an album because I overestimated my actual skills in playing piano / singing, and I've lost the will to carry on because I know it'll be shit. I can't relax and do nothing because I feel guilty for being unproductive and leeching off my parents.
TL;DR - I had it all, man
>>30019394
Im thinking what im going to do with my life.
Im getting kicked out of the army for mental issues after being in for 7 months. And those where some of the best months iv wver had. Now im going back home and back to being a NEET loser. My parents probably look at me different and i feel like iv failed at life
>>30019922
That's horrible, I'm sorry you're going through that. Try to maybe ask her to do something, but I'd personally try to expand your friend circle. Stuff like this is a lot easier to do when you have others to do stuff with. I've actually not had much romantic success with girls I was already friends with beforehand, so I'm not sure how good of a way that is. I just feel like if you're already invested in keeping her as a friend, then you won't have the confidence to just go for it and not care if it fails.
>>30019394
Finally got a bunch ofpiratedgames that I wanted but couldn't find the motivation to grab.
My trichotillomania (a form of OCD) has been going wild lately, probably in reaction to my druggie Chad brother making my parents miserable. Forgot alot of the skills I learned from my old therapist, so I've no idea how to cope with it aside from carrying on.
How are you, OP?
>>30020011
Depression is a bitch, m8. My depression caused me to drop out of uni, lose most of my friends and nearly kill myself. If you try to deal with it then the rest of the stuff will be easier to deal with. You've already shown that you CAN function in a normal world, all you need to do is deal with that depression hurdle.
>>30020011
>I feel guilty for being unproductive and leeching off my parents.
You already have a job man, you are leeching that much from your parents. When you will have free time, take a bike trip, I am serious, get out and just drive somewhere, put your favorite music on and just drive.
>>30020077
>I just feel like if you're already invested in keeping her as a friend, then you won't have the confidence to just go for it and not care if it fails.
s up, I will have to spend rest of my remaining university years with a person which knows I was into her. That's pretty terrifying perspective.
>>30019846
>This is going to sound so stupidly corny, but there are plenty more fish in the sea
Thanks - I hope so anyway.
I'm only 18 and I know people younger than me that are already married and/or have up to 3 children. I'm also fully aware that gay people are generally sluts and have way more sex with way more people than heterosexuals. I don't want used goods who will compare me to their countless other partners and life-ruining STDs; my only four criteria are:
>Genuinely likes me for who I am
>Loyal
>Virgin
>Has a somewhat similar personality to me
and I can't even seem to do that. It's terrifying knowing that time could run out very quickly.
Oh well... When life gives you lemons, sit in the corner and have an existential crisis while surrounded by citrus fruit.
>>30020141
>That's the point, I am affreid if I fuck this up, I will have to spend rest of my remaining university years with a person which knows I was into her. That's pretty terrifying perspective.**
I am retarded.
>>30020021
I'm sorry man. What kinds of mental issues? You haven't failed at life, anon. A fish isn't a failure because it can't climb a tree, and you have mental issues which prevent you from some stuff, but that's ok, you'll find your way nevertheless.
>>30019959
>>30019984
Thanks anons, I will try to find a gym in my vicinity. I have the feeling like boxing is a pretty good robot sport, because you learn to actually rely on yourself and can let off steam effectively.
I already see myself in the next feels thread because I got my ass beat.
>>30020112
Sorry about your OCD going wild, man. Are you still seeing a therapist about it? If not, maybe now's a good time to start seeing one and mentioning what's been happening.
I'm feeling depressed and apathetic. I mentioned it earlier in the thread - my gf of two months has gone off to Spain with her parents, and it's the first time we've spent a significant amount of time without contacting each other. What's more, she's moving to Oxford in August and I'm worried about having a long-distance relationship and stuff.
>>30020189
From what the doctors at the psych ward told me. I have general anxiety disorder as well as major depression. One of my battle buddies reported me after i made a joke about suicide.
I just dont know what to do anymore. The Army was kind of my last resort.
>>30020141
Yeah I can understand the terror completely. It's one thing to meet with a girl you met on Tinder, being very forward and if you get rejected, saying whatever and seeing the next, but someone you know and cherish is a different thing entirely.
>ruined my oen relationship
>leaving everyone i know behind
>deprssions back n hitting hard
>everyday a become more and more NEET hikkikomori
Ive had a rough month lads
I had a really bad review at work with my boss. I've been at the same place for close to five years, originally it was a part-time thing while I was in college and long story short my job took over my life after a promotion. Now I'm at the point where I have almost nothing left to learn and it's obvious I'm disinterested and stagnating.
For the last couple months I implicated that I was trying to find another job to transition over to but there were almost no responses to my applications. I had two interviews but was passed over, and during the review my current boss asked what the heck I was planning on doing with my life if I'm just juggling ideas around without actually getting anywhere. I was almost in tears telling them that I couldn't get a job in something I want to do because nobody would hire me.
So now I don't know if I should keep trying to find another job or give up and go to pharm tech classes to transfer from my position at work and hopefully get a job at a hospital or something. I honestly really hate my life right now.
>>30019656
Do you have some free time? If so, make it into a hobby.
It'd be slow to start, but if your work gets recognised, you might get job offers as a game/app dev. Most jobs like these prefer portfolios to degrees.
Keep up the office job, though. Unless it's holding you back, it's good for putting bread on the table.
>>30020286
Yeah, but my friend is pushing me to take the risk(it looks like he really wants me to finally be truly happy, with someone which cares for me). And she is kind similiar to me in some aspects. I am afraid I will fuck this up and will hurt her and myself, but I also afraid I won't meet someone like this again. Shit's nuts
>>30020143
>Virgin
The rest are fine, but truth be told, it's practically impossible to find someone who's a virgin, especially gay or bi. To put it into perspective, there is this one guy I know who's tried practically EVERYTHING when it comes to sex. At some point he had a threesome with a guy and his pregnant gf who was on her back and had her arms and legs tied to the bedposts. His biggest unfulfilled sexual fantasy is taking someone's virginity. Like, that's how hard it is to find a virgin. Perhaps it might be easier to change your perspective on this kind of stuff.
On a eurotrip with my best mates. Hoped a month in hostels would help jumpstart my social life. But most nights just end with us all in our beds them texting their gfs and me lurking here. I know I'm better off than most but I just wish I had someone special too instead of just feeling more depressed. Plus when I get home in a week, it's back to studying. I just wish I could feel good about anything.
>>30020392
How old are you sir?
orginalo
OP here, I'm so sorry, but I'm collapsing, so I can't continue this thread. Good luck to all of you robots, and thanks for talking.
>>30020112
OCD is some really terrible shit, I never got diagnosed, but I know certainly that I have it, because I am anxious as fuck about my house every time I leave (or even if I do not). I always think that I forgot something despite having good memory and checking everything 100 times.
So every time I leave you see me running around the house several times and starring at things like a retard.
I noticed that it always got worse when my physical health went down the drain, how are you holding up? You should make efforts to eat well and excercise, it always takes some part of the burden. Also personally for me it seems like it is coming from a severe lack of trust for myself, your doc probably told you this, but maybe you should try to tackle possible underlying problems in your life.
I can't get her back, shit i don't even think I want to anymore, I'll see a girl in a couple of days, hope no spaghetti gets spilled... All that time thinking about her wasn't worth it, thanks r9k you were My home in times of depression but Know i have to leave, For My own good. See you Space robots
>>30020322
>Do you have some free time? If so, make it into a hobby
I want to do this but after work I'm too tired to do anything mentally taxing. Don't have much motivation anyways. Maybe in the future.
>>30020445
Godspeed anon, don't ever look back
>>30020429
Take care and watch out OP, hope you will be happier someday
>>30020143
I think you might be waiting a long time if they have to be a virgin, friendo
anyone with a gf or oneitis, please leave this entire board and go to /b/. nobody wants you here. you are weak and fell for the glorified woman meme and you still cant cope? fuck off
>>30020516
Yeah man, I want a gf too
>>30019394
Spending my day drinking coffee and lurking as usual, still struggling at finding something that interests me. I used to love computers and technology but it feels like everything that had to be done is done, kinda pointless to pursue anything in that field. Struggling to find a job at the moment, will power is not enough anymore.
>>30020516
Something wrong anon? Tell us about it.
>>30020530
they will do nothing but drag you down and waste your time, for what? only to satisfy an urge that can be fulfilled in 5 minutes on pornhub.
>>30020405
Do not waste this opportunity man. I deeply regret being a retarded manchild back then and not appreciating the fact that I was able to see every part of Rome or Brussels. A trip is not about texting your friends back home all the time, your friends are idiots if they spend their whole time on their phone.
Enhoy the fact that you are able to see new places and turn this whole >tfw no gf shit off for once.
You do not know how much I wished I could trade places with you, I have no money or time to travel right now and wont have it for several years. Not mentioning the fact that my city makes me want to puke at this point.
Just attended to university, still not sure in my field. I won't be able to compete. Have been told several times that I got an "unfailing potential m8", it works like a trigger. Can't get rid of suicidal thoughts. Every time I come home I feel trapped and slowly going insane.
And this fucking weird deja vu feeling, which happens too much often. Some dreams I had, I didn't write but remember, and at some point it repeats itself after some time.
>>30020537
>but it feels like everything that had to be done is done
Did you try to color old photos? It's pretty relaxing thing to do.
>>30020571
Dont get me wrong, I'm totally loving seeing all these places, it's almost like as soon as night falls all that excitement just vanishes and I feel like shit again. Maybe I'm just depressed or something, it's just hard to get out of your comfort zone without a bit of help
I'm just thinking about my social anxiety, as always. It's so severe that I can't go out in public by myself. It's been this way for years now and nothing helps. I've tried working up to shopping by myself so that I could then get a job, but that is so tiring and stressful that I recover by being a complete shut-in. I just wish I could work so no one could bother me about being useless.
>>30020560
I wanna cuddle though
>>30020252
Nah, trying to save up for a car. I might give her a call, though. She was really chill about phone sessions.
Aw man, that sucks. How often would you be able to see her if she moves to oxford? Why is she?
>>30020592
>whole post
Are you me? I used to have(and stil have) "deja vu dreams". Try something new bike, gym, just walking(I am not meming you, it can help). Your brain just gone into routine and puts similiar things from your life to your dreams(completely opposite of what dreams are).
>>30020646
I feel you bro, I only have a job I got through connections, but I still eat stale bread because I don't have the courage to walk to the local bakery, I swear I even hand money to cashiers like a fucking autist
Like a fucking idiot I did cocaine, drank until I blacked out, then apparently cheated on the love of my life.
She doesn't know, but the guilt is consuming me and I've never considered suicide until now.
>>30020592
i started feeling like that during the onset of major depressive. thought it was bipolar or schiz-type. only recently i made an appointment with a GP and ended up on zoloft, so i cant attest to the efficiency of it just yet, but to put a name to it, that's what i was going through.
>>30019394
>what's on your mind
The fact that i know if i would work on myself just a bit and fix my depression, or at least lessen it to some extent, then i would have a decent shot at being somewhat ok. I even like myself as a person and i know people can and do like me and yet i can't even imagine living something close to a happy life and have absolutely no motivation to better myself.
>>30020727
You deserve to feel miserable, but you can use this an an opportunity to fix yourself and find someone better. Life's the longest thing you'll ever do, you have time
Anybody here feel immediately snapped out of a depressing state after they clean up?
I just cleaned the house and took a really good bath afterwards and now I feel oddly happy.
>>30020771
I don't want anyone else.
I have the flu so I couldn't go to Dungeons and Dragons today.
I'm paranoid that this'll somehow be a strike against me, even though my friend texted me to get better soon. And I'm afraid my friend is going to get a gf and stop hanging out as much. I only have one real friend.
I know I'm just being weird but I'm stuck in a negative thought loop or something.
>>30020796
You have to be honest then. You fucked up, but living a lie is just going to make you feel worse.
>>30020638
I see where you are coming from.
To be fair, I would rather travel alone anyway, so there would be no one holding me back or presenting me a life I do not have. I think this should pass over time, at some point one has to go over it and enjoy himself.
Try your best to let it go man, it is the only thing you can do.
everything's been going wrong. it's extra shitty because for the past two years i've been trying to hard to get my shit together, i was almost hopeful then it all came crashing down. now i'm just trying to man up and find a way to off myself. i've been reading about it a bit. drugs are out, too many survive. cutting's out, again too many survive. i can't afford a gun and it turns out i can't even afford rope either, so i think shooting myself and hanging myself are out. i guess i could jump off of a building but i'm not sure there are any around here that are high enough to get the job done, let alone if i could actually get to the top cause of locked doors or whatnot.
i think a few methods mixed together might be my best bet though, ideally. if i could overdose on something and then hang myself, or shoot myself in the head and hang myself i'm pretty sure that'd be the safest way to go about it.
i'm crashing and burning so hard it's insane. 30 years of hell. i really did try though. the only person that actually cares i went off on last night in a drunken stupor. it's just all a mess that can't be fixed. i apologized and she understood it was just drunken stupidity, but i really fucking hate myself for it, it was so unjustified and just.. fucked up. i've always been a good and decent person, i've never blown up on anybody like that before in my life. i've fallen apart so much it's starting to affect other people. i'm ashamed of myself.
>>30020392
>it's practically impossible to find someone who's a virgin, especially gay or bi
That's exactly why I'm terrified. I'm worried I'd continuously be compared to previous partners by a non-virgin, not to mention the overwhelming possibility that they'd infect me with HIV or something (which would then get me fired from the job I'm studying for, because risk of doctor to patient transmission) and/or leave me to return to a life of sluttiness.
I keep trying to hold on to the hope that, since I'm still a virgin, there's at least one other person out there like me. The lifestyle that the majority of them lead seems so unfulfilling and empty. I don't even have any physical standards. Obese with acne, balding, unkempt facial hair, body odor, severe autism, and micropenis? Sure, whatever! I actually prefer the modest 4/10 aesthetic to the 8+/10 chad one. Anything's better than being pumped and dumped or being used by someone who ultimately wouldn't reciprocate the care you felt for them, because they've already felt it more strongly for people they can't remember.
It's a lost cause though, isn't it? Some people live successful and fulfilled, yet lonely lives, right?
>>30020794
Yeh, I always feel like now I can start with a blank slate. I feel the best when I get a fresh haircut, clean up, sort my stuff and have my sleep schedule on track.
I guess it is simply the impact of noticeably making a change. It might not be much, but for an average robots lifestyle it can have quite an effect.
>>30020849
Cheers mate, it helps just to rant a bit
>>30020452
Ah, apathy. I know that feel.
Try a double espresso after work. Sometimes, it wakes you up and makes you feel more motivated and alive. You could put it off until the future, but then, it may never get done.
There's no time like the present.
>>30020600
Guess this should be a good quickstart for it? http://www.tutorialgeek.net/2012/11/use-gimp-to-create-color-photos-from.html
On the surface I guess things are going well for me, I finally moved out of my parents' house and got my own place, got a gf and lost my virginity and have been working out and learning to cook and shit, but none of it is making me any happier. I'm still the same exact depressed piece of shit but I have nicer surroundings. I don't like any of the stuff I do, my gf is basically just a fleshlight to me, and honestly acting like I'm a normal person is just fucking exhausting. Is this all there is to look forward to? Making more money and having nicer stuff? It just feels so empty. I'm 25 btw.
>>30021062
>all this
nope, no sir. i dont want it
>>30021062
Oh great. So there is no hope for me. Even fixing my shit and moving out it will still be horrible.
>>30021172
Probably depends on your specific issues. I've been diagnosed with major depressive disorder since I was about 20, and it's proven very treatment-resistant, so take that for what it's worth.
>>30021283
Yup. rip
>>30021062
>has a girlfriend
>is not a virgin
>still claims to be "depressed"
Get the fuck out of here you piece of shit.
>>30020893
I don't really know what I can tell you that will help, but I hope you find peace whatever you do anon.
>>30020911
I wanted to upload this image I just made along with this post, in reference to my earlier post, but I couldn't finish it before it would have seemed awkwardly late for me to respond.
Just imagine this was on the post...
>>30021567
dude im like him. peace is the last thing i want, cos that would actually warrant suicide. only reason i havent killed myself is because i am NOT at peace. got a lot of loose ends to tie, talents to master, and places to see. being incapable of doing just that makes me want to kill myself, but then it's like a catch 22. til then i have this dumb hooligan bucket list.
>>30021778
I get what you mean, but I basically meant that i hope he finds peace in death.
>>30019394
I'm thinking and trying to remember when was the last time I was ok. Thinking if I made the right job choice.
> Thinking about secondary school, those days were the best days in my life. Everything had a purpose, a reason, be it labs, assignments, exams or projects.
>uni was ok, studied hard, worked hard, enjoyed the time with my mom.
>things don't get better with time
>>30019830
>Shilling anti-depressants this hard.
I was suicidal as a kid, and they put me on Paxil when i was 10, that was over 16 years ago, now i feel like they are making me feel empty and i want to know what adult life would be like without them.
>psych tries to titrate me off and i have a seizure.
Panic attacks because i dont want to have another seizure
>psych says i should go up to 40mg for panic.
Meds should be a last resort, there's so much dirty bullshit with psychiatric medication its nuts. Doctors getting kickbacks for prescribing a certain amount. Clinical trials being changed and information about the medication withheld.
Paxil has some of the worst discontinuation symptoms in its class, and the company that makes it still denies this is even a problem or a thing that happens.
Just check this out
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paroxetine#Society_and_culture
>>30021567
no one could say anything to help, it's just one of those things i guess. thanks though, i appreciate the sentiment.
>>30019394
I'm feeling down even though everything in my life is going well. My careers is where it should be, moneys alright, I got a bunch of great friends. It just all feels hollow. The only thing I'm missing is a girlfriend, since I have trouble forming intimate relationships and have high standards, but I know even that won't make me happy.
I dream of being a boxer and i practice nearly everyday but with my robot self esteem i feel like i cant do it, whatdo
girl calls me her bf, holds my hand, hugs me flirts, etc. i tend to ignore her a bit, but she hits me up on twitter dm to talk to me then i say if she wants to actually wants to have a converstaion or something to text me instead. she says she doesnt have a phone, which she does. nothing for weeks then randomly messages me to congratualte me on graduating. nothing next
