Post about the time you fell for the dildo meme
>Increasing levels of faggotry on all boards I frequent over the past years
>Watch a thread about prostate orgasms, dildoing your ass, everyone says it feels amazing etc
>Decide to try it out
>Buy a basic kit consisting of a natural sized dildo, lube, disinfectant and a douche
>Try it out
>Feels decent at first
>Play around with it for 20-30 minutes
>Realise I prefer fapping the proper way
>Finish myself, clean up
>Look at myself in the mirror
>What the fuck am I doing with my life.jpg
>Out of the four items I bought the one that amazed me the most was the douche, that thing is surprisingly effective
>Keep the disinfectant since it's probably a decent hand sanitizer
>Keep the lube since I most likely will be able to find some use for it
>Throw out the dildo
Heed my words, robots. Never listen to faggots
>>29671213
Did you at least keep the douche?
>>29671384
No
I heavily considered it since I found it to be brutally effective at cleaning out your ass. It's absolutely superb at removing shit (literally) that you didn't even know was hiding up there.
With that being said I don't think I'll need one in the future since nothing is going up my ass again and I still can maintain basic hygiene by wiping after taking a shit.
>>29671213
>see increasing levels of faggotry on all boards I frequent
>start seeing more and more cuck, BBC, trap porn
>be 19, shy and awkward with 5'8" 128lbs super pale & hairless feminine body
>Watch a thread about prostate orgasms, dildoing your ass, everyone says it feels amazing etc
>go on Amazon and decide to buy some different size buttplugs, a chastity cage and a Lex Steele replica dildo since I enjoy his movies
>edge for 8 days straight without cumming
>give myself a nice enema
>try putting different buttplugs up my ass going progressively larger while edging and watching porn for an hour or so
>lube up my penis and put it in the chastity cage
>decide to try and take the Lex dildo
>hard to get it in at first but I take it slow and it eventually goes balls deep
>start pounding away
>it feels really weird like I have to poop but I'm so horny I keep going since everyone says it should feel amazing
>keep pounding away for 10-15 minutes
>my arm is getting tired and I'm kinda out of breath
>all of a sudden I feel like I have to pee
>keep pound my ass anyway and suddenly I blow a huge load while still locked in my chastity cage
>feels fucking amazing, much better than vaginal sex
>almost pass out
>after I regain my composure a sense of shame envelops me
>go shower, still feel ashamed of myself
>end up trowing the dildo and buttplugs away later that day
>fap regularly for the next few weeks but honestly nothing compares to cumming from the dildo
>end up reordering all the stuff I threw away
>fuck me, what a waste of $160
>now I immediately put away all my toys after cumming so I don't toss them
>I still feel like shit for being such a faggot and letting this place ruin me
Heed my words robots, you'll either not like anal that much like OP and feel bad for being a faggot, or you'll love anal and still feel bad for being a faggot.
Pic related, the Lex Steele dildo I ordered from Amazon.
>>29671638
Would you consider having actual gay sex or are you only into girls?
>>29671638
Can I pound your bussy m8
>>29671670
I fantasize about it all the time but I'm pretty shy irl and I don't know if I could ever go through with it. I think about getting fucked in the ass about as much as I imagine fucking girls.
>>29671704
I feel like I would be so awkward and self conscious if I actually got with another guy.
Pic related, one of the buttplugs I ordered. I still can't believe I wasted all that money on throwing them out.
>>29671728
That's why you turn the lights off and cover up the windows. That way you can just enjoy the feeling without having to worry about anything else.
>>29671670
OP here
I'd never have sex with a masculine or regularly built guy but at the same time I won't deny that it's not exactly straight to shove phallus-like objects up your ass
Think of it like the people that are into shemale/trap porn, they're attracted to feminine features with the cock being an additional yet defining feature
>>29671740
Yeah, I don't think my social anxiety is that easy to trick. Plus, I'm terrified of STD's. I'd love to get pounded by a group of guys but I don't think I could go through with it.
>>29671728
So how close are you to buying some panties and a dress to wear while you use your toys? Shaving your body hair yet?
>>29671864
Uh, I sorta already do all that. I'm naturally pretty hairless but I shave/wax to be completely smooth.
I also bought some cute lingerie and other girl clothes to wear. I paint my toes too.
Yeah, I'm pretty ashamed of it all tbqh.
>>29671213
Lol faggot you are such a queer
>>29671638
Lol you are such a faggot, dick in ass means faggot u faggot HAHAHHAHAH enjoy being a faggot
>>29671899
Thank you for the insightful contributions to this thread.
>>29671895
Pics. Now.
hornyblox
>>29671899
>enjoy being a faggot
I think he does.
>>29671929
Sorry anon, I'm posting from my phone and I'm too self conscious to post pics desu. The ones I have on my computer need to be heavily edited and cropped so they don't show what my room/face looks like.
>>29671960
You can't crop your face on your phone? You can't snap a quick pic of your butthole? C'mon.
>>29671960
Do you have skype so I can flirt with a cute girly boy?
>>29671992
>You can't crop your face on your phone? You can't snap a quick pic of your butthole? C'mon.
I don't think my coworkers would appreciate if I took a butthole pic in the middle of our work space.
>>29672002
No Skype anon, sorry. I mostly chat on Whatsapp and Snapchat but only with people I know.
>>29671213
>fell for the traps are better than real girls meme
>decide to try my luck at traps since I'm terrible with real girls
>attend tranny club events at my college because I don't want to go to a gay bar
>claim I'm there for community service bullshit reasons
>end up eventually taking home a fairly passable trap one day
>we run our dicks together to masturbate and do degenerate shit
>fuck her in the ass and cum on her dick
>suck her off afterwards
>fuck each other in every way for the next 3 hours before exhaustion
>fall asleep together covered in sweat and cum
>we've been dating for 4 months now and she's extremely devoted to me
>also she's as horny as I am so we fuck often
I think I became the faggotry. Tbqh though there is some truth to the trap meme, if you treat one like a real girl and don't just use her for sex she'll dedicate herself to you. Traps are kind of picky but not as hard to get with as girls, and when you do they're much more submissive.
>inb4 "she"
>inb4 normie GTFO
>>29671992
>>29672002
>not realizing this is all just a game of pretend and he probably looks like jonah hill
mfw
>>29672075
ever get shitdick?
trick question, you always get shitdick.
>>29672082
Kek, I'm not a fat Jew, I swear.
>>29672109
No you don't senpai, not if who you're fucking actually cares about hygiene.
>fall for the BBC cuckold trap meme
>get a thong and shave my body hair
>eat my own cum
>shove sharpies up my butt
>considering buying anal toys now
And to think 7 years ago I was into normal stuff, thanks 4chan
>>29672109
Yeah, this has never happened to me and I'm the one putting the Lex dildo in my butt. If you know you're body and have regular bowel movements you shouldn't need more than a gentle douche to make sure you're clean.
It probably helps that I'm a vegetarian and eat tons of fiber. I've read that people who eat lots of meat have a harder time cleaning themselves out.
>>29672161
>7 years ago
You are psychologically stronger than me. It only took like 2 years in my case to go from totally straight to shoving dildos up my butt while wearing a bra, a chastity cage and having pretty painted nails.
>>29672161
That's not a meme you faggot, everyone makes fun of that bullshit. Holy shit faggot how did you let this happen?
>>29672192
The trap meme wasn't as strong outside of a couple of anime characters and cuck stuff was non-existent back then. It was just loli for me until recently
>this is the typical man now
Oh how far we have fallen.
>>29672192
You need some extra protein in that vegetarian diet?
>>29671213
>Fell for the mommy gf meme
>in a relationship with a dominant older woman
>she fucks me with a strapon and gives me handjobs, I give her oral
>has given me prostate orgasms
>is always the one who initiates sex
>I'm submissive to her even outside the bedroom
>feel like a little bitch but addicted to her
What happened to me. I'm still a virgin too, have never penetrated her after a year of dating.
>>29672254
I guess sure. I've only ever eaten my own cum and it tastes fine but I've heard that meat eaters usually have worse tasting cum. Do you eat your fruits and veggies?
>>29672404
I tried my cum once ages ago and was so grossed out... I read about vegan cum recently and I've been vegan for over a year now and I gave it a go... It was delicious and I'll probably do it again soon.
S H A M E
>>29672404
>>29672422
My cum has no flavor or anything, it's just sticky gloop
>>29672404
no i eat a fair bit of meat, im not sure what effect that has but my loads are usually copious and thick
