What's your best SpongeGar moment?
>just drove out to the country road to chill, smoke some dope and listen to tunes.
>be dark out
>Notice two cars coming, both directions.
>I'm parked on a large dirt shoulder with vehicle still on
>Notice I'm probably blinding the dude in the car coming my way
>turn car off and go into some sort of stealth mode
>car coming my way passes
>car coming from behind me is noticeably slowing speed while approaching
>think wtf this dude doing?
>car gets in sight basically as it's passing me, I see it's a cop car...
>My heart sinks and I just feel like dying on the spot
>Entire car smells of dope and I have a good bit on me
>thinking of how I'm going to hide everything in 2.0 seconds and also think of a reason why the fuck I'm out here parked in the middle of nowhere
>just stare the car down waiting for it to stop or for the lights to come on
>He just keep on going
>I start my car when the cop is otta sight and turn 360 and tear it down the back road paranoid as fuck I'm gunna see the cherries way down the road
>Drive around town for an hour too scared to go back around that area which is near my house.
>Finally get home, run upstairs to start this thread
First time in 5 years of using that road I see a cop and I just happen to be doing illegal things.
Sometimes I believe in god and angels and shit cuz of dis shit....
>>29533910
>be me
>jaywalk
>get hit by a hearse
>>29533910
>be younger me
>9 years old
>just discovered masturbation
>take a day off of school to do nothing but masturbate
>say I'm sick
>parents still home
>lying in bed all day
>father comes in to check my temperature and stuff
>my pants are down under the covers with my hand on my dick
>still_as_stone.tiff
>can't remember why, but he flung the covers off of me
>PULL PANTS UP AT THE SPEED OF LIGHT AND HOP UP OUT OF BED
>I think he didn't notice
>oh my fucking god, why would he fling the covers off like that
>>29534173
AHahha he knew!
>>29534352
shit, you're probably right
also, bumping this thread for more stories
>>29534830
>was a nympho kid in my early years
>used to fuck everything or at least try to
>pulled the rubber handle off the vacuum cleaner
>perfect size for muh dick
>got hair gel out to use for lube
>proceed to have a good time
>I finish and hear my sisters clunker car pull into the driveway
>her and her bf come rushing in
>I'm losing my shit trying to put everthing away
>gotta wipe the hair gel from inside the rubber handle
>slide the handle back on the vacuum
>dispose of cum/hair gel towel
>so my feathers are all ruffled when they walk in
>I did a good job cleaning up so I get away with it
>An hour later sisters bf is vacuuming the house
>the once "tight and snug" handle to the vacuum is just sliding right off when ever he pulls the vacuum
>starts losing his shit and just making it slide off into the wall.
>He's had enough and starts investigating
>Pulls the handle off and looks into it
>"Wtf theres something all over the inside of this handle"
>It smells like hair gel
>He's saying these things to me
>I just say "Huh that's weird."
and nothing ever came of it.
>>29534989
I can't tell you the amount of times I've been almost caught while or for masturbating
shit's terrifying, dude
